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TELL THEM TO OBEY THE LAWS AND UPHOLD THE CONSTITUTION OF THE UNITED STATES ."Last Words op Stephex a. Douglas.
UEBANA, OHIO, WEBKESDAY, MAY 28, 1862.
Poetry for the Hour.
"UNDER THE SNOW."
GENERAL LANDERS LAST POEM.
Th Spring had tripped and lost her flowers,
The Summer sauntered thro' the glades,
The wonnded feet of Autumn hours
Left ruddy footprluU on the blades.
And H the glories of the woods
Had Sang their shadowy silence dawn,
Tia, wilder than the storm it broods,
She fled before the winter's frown.
for her sweet spring had lost its flowers.
She fell, and passion's tongues of flame -
Ban reddening thro' the blushing bowers,
Now haggard as her naked shame.
One secret thought her soul had screened.
When prying matrons sought her wrong,
And Blame stalked on, a mouthing fiend,
And mocked her as she lied along,
And now she bore its Weight aloof.
To hide it where one ghastly birch
Held up the rafters of the roof.
And grim old pine trees formed a church.
Twas there her spring-time vows were sworn,
And there, apon its frozen sod.
While wintry midnight reigned forlorn
fine knelt, and held her hands to God.
The cautious creatures of the air
Looked ont from many a secret place,
To sec the embers of despair
Flush the grey ashes of her face.
An I where the last week's snow had caught
7 he grey beard of a cypress limb
fbt heard the mas if of a thought
Hare sweet than her own childhood's hymn.
For, rtsiag U tkat cadence low,
VBi " Sow I lay ne down to sleep,"
Her otefher rocked her to and fro,
And prayed the Lord her soul to keep.
And still her prayer was nimbly raissd,
Held up In two cold hands to God,
That, white as some old pine tree blazed.
Gleamed far o'er that dark frozen sod.
The storm stole oat beyond the wood.
She grew the riaion of a cloud.
Her dark hair was a misty hood.
Her stark face shown as from a shroud.
Still sped the wild storm's rustling feet
To martial music of the pines.
And to her cold heart's muffled beat
Wheeled grandly into solemn lines.
And still, as if her secret's woe
No mortal words had ever found
This dying sinner draped in snow
Held np her prayer without a sound.
But when the holy angel bands
Saw this lone vigil, lowly kept.
They gathered from her frozen hands
The prayer thus folded, and they wept.
Some snow-flakes wiser than the rest
Soon faltered o'er a thing of clay,
First read this secret of her breast,
Then gently robed her where she lay.
The dead dark hair, made white with snow,
A still, stark face, two folded palms.
And (mothers breath her secret low !)
An unborn infant asking aims.
God kept her counsel ; cold and mute
ITu steadfast mourners closed her eyes ;
Hor headstone was an old tree's root.
Be mine to ntter, " Here she lies."
WHY THE WIDOW JENKINS
DIDN'T MARRY DR. WELLS.
" Wbt didn't the widow Jenkins marry Dr.
Wells'" That was the exciting subject of
debate before the Gossiptown " Ladies' Mu
tual Improvement and Widows' Relief So
ciety," at one ef their weekly meetings.
Now, Dr. Wells had been very attentive to
Mrs. Jenkins for a number of months. He in
variably walked home with her from church,
had escorted her to a number of pic-nics, and
in many ways had evinced his partiality. As
for the young and pretty widow, she did not
appear to be at all displeased with these at
tentions ; on the contrary, she received them
with evident pleasure ; so their marriage was
considered a settled thing by the inhabitants
of Gossiptown in general and the members of
the " Ladies' Mutual Improvement and Wid
ows' Belief Society," in particular.
So, when they learned that be had sudden
ly disappeared, without telling them where
lie was going, what he was going for, when
be was coming back, tc, Ac, all of which
particulars they felt they had an undisputed
right te know and without bidding any of
them good bye, their astonishment and indig
nation ware intense.
Strang and conflicting Were their conjec
tures and various were the rumors that were
thereby set afloat. Some said that he had been
arrested for high treason, some that he was a
py from the Confederate army, while others
- did not hesitate to gay that he was a bigamist,
one of those wandering gentry who go from
town to town, deceiving with their perfidious
wiles the susceptible hearts of that confiding
ex whose gullibility has become proverbial.
But finally, after due deliberation and care
ful consideration of all the pros and cons, the
whys and wherefores, by the directors oc the
above-mentioced society, U-wit: Miss Dor
thy Wormwood, Miss Lovetalk, Mrs. Pickflaw,
and Mrs. Makefuss, tliey came to the unani
mous conclusion " that this mysterious disap
pearance was occasioned by the rejection of
Dr. ells by the widow Jeukins, for some
cause to them unknown, but supposed to be
some terrible crime committed by the afore
said doctor ; and that the aforesaid gentleman
had leftGassiptown clandestinely, to hide his
discomfiture and to avoid the shame of a dis
closure." Indeed, Miss Lovetalk testified, " that one
day, as she was walking past the widow's
Louse, she saw the doctor and Mr. Jenkins
together in the garden, and distinctly heard
the latter tell the former, " That she should
certainly expose his conduct" And that the
doctor replied, " That he hoped she wouldn't
a it would be the ruin of him." Upon which
the widow gave sort of a derisive laugh.
Whereupon Mrs. Pickflaw shook her head,
and said, " That she didn't know what strong'
er proof they wanted than that For her part,
she was free to own that she never did like
Dr. Wells. She knew he was a grsat favor
it with some folks, but his smooth oily ways
didn't go down with her! She never had
said anything because she didn't wish to in
jure the young man's prospects, but it had
long been her private opinion that he was
nothing but a wolf in sheep's clothing!
Mothers ought to be very careful," she added,
drawing herself up with dignity, " with whom
they allow their daughters to associate. I took
an early opportunity to warn my daughters
against him ; and it is very gratifying to me
to reflect that they had the wisdom to profit
by the advice." (Mem. When Dr. Wells
first came to Gossiptown, this wise and pru
dent matron was very assidious in her atten
tions, using every art iu her power to entrap
him into a marriage with one of her five uu
" And the widow Jenkins is of the same
piece, I'm of the opinion," said the amiable
Miss Dorthy Wormwood. " The airs that
woman puts on are perfectly ridiculous! I
should think after this that she'd hold her head
a little lower."
"I should think so, too," chimed in the
charitable Mrs. Makefuss. " I guess if the
truth was known, it would be found out that
she's no better than she ought to be I To my
certain knowledge, she has been altogether
too free, not only with Dr. Wells, but with
other gentlemen I could mention. For my
part, I should be glad if her conduct could be
considered in the light of imprudence."
" It seems that she was'nt imprudent enough
to marry Dr. Wells, remarked Miss Lovetalk;
" though one could see, with halfan eye, that
she was over bead a.id ears in love with him.
What could have been the reason ?"
This was re-echoed by the company, while
deep perplexity sat upon all countenances.
And this brings us back to the commence
ment of our story. " Why didu't the widow
marry Dr. Wells?"
It was clear to these astute minds, that the
wi.low herself was the only person who co aid
settle this vexed question, lint with all her
kindness of heart and affability, there was a
gentle dignity iu this lady's manner that pre-
vented anv attemnt at familiaritv. so no one
was bold enough to ask her point blank, and
hints and insinuations the either could not, or
would not understand.
Miss Lovotalk once venture! to ask, " if she
expected to hear from the doctor ?'' to which
she received a decided negative. And they
had each, respectively, expressed their aston-
sliment at his sudden disappearance, in the
hope of obtaining some clue to the mystery.
but the widow listenel in grave silence, giv-f
ing them no intimation, by word or look, that
she knew any more about it than they; so
they we're completely baffL'd.
"There is Ilattie Burns going by!" said
Mrs. Worm wood, suddenly, as she happened
to glance out ot the window. " Til warrant
she knows something about it, if she was only
a mind to tell, she is over to the widow's
more'n half the time."
"I shouldn't wonder if s!ie did," exclaimed
Miss Lovetalk." " I mean to call her in."
Hattie was called in accordingly; and no
important witness ever underwent a sharper
coss-questioning at the hands of the most in
genious criminal lawyer than diJ the aston
ished girl before this self-constituted "Court
But they elicited nothing of importance.
Hattie solemnly declared " that she hadn't
heard Mrs. Jenkins mention the doctor's name:
though she had thought that she seemed more
sober than usual since lie went away."
At last by the dint of tea and flattery with
which they plied her liberally, Ilattie, who
was but a young, giddy girl, and not a little
elated at the idea of being a person of so much
importance, was induced to promise that she
would ask Mrs. Jeukins why she refused Dr.
Wells, for that she had refused him they were
fully convinced, and duly report her reply.
Hattie had hardly left the house before she
heartily repented of the promise that she had
so thoughtlessly made, but as she had given
her word she determined to redeem it.
So the next morning she set out upon her
errand. The nearer she approached the house,
the more unpleasantly she felt ; for she was a
sensible, though impulsive girl, and could not
but feel npon reflection, that this inquiry was
impertinent, and one which their intimacy,
open and unrestrained as it was, gave her no ,
right to make.
When she reached the house, the cloud upon
her Usually sunny brow and the unwonted
constraint of her manner, could not fail to be
noticed by Mrs. Jenkins, who, though but a
few years her senior, feit motherly interest;
the young girl, who was an orphan.
" What ails yon, Hattie ?" she inquired
kindly. Are you sick ?''
"No yes," stammered poor Hattie, who
began to feel what little courage she had been
able to muster oozing out of the ends of her
fingers " that is, I don't feel very well. The
fact is," she added, desperately, " I've got into
The kind-hearted widow looked a little
anxious, for she was well acquainted with
Haltie's impulsive disposition, but she said
quietly, " And you have come to ask me to
help you out of it ?"
" Yes. And if you only will, my dear Mrs.
Jenkins, I promise you that I .will never get
" You may be sure that I will do the best I
can for you, Hattie, but you must first tell me
what it is ?"
" Well, the ' society lad; s' yesterday made
me promise to ask you a question, a very im
pertinent one, I am sure you will say, when
you hear it"
Mrs. Jenkins' countenance cleared. " Is
thai all, you silly child ?" she said. " Why,
I thought it was something terrible ! Sut do
pray toll me what the question is ? I am very
curious to know."
" They want to know," said Hattie hesita
tingly, " why you didn't marry Dr. Wells?
They will have it that he has turned out some
dreadful character, a pirate, a robber, to aay
the least ; and that you have found it 0ut and
Mrs. Jenkins' expressive countenance as she
heard this, underwent various changes ; first
she looked astonished, then indignant, then
she colored and then smiled.
" I hope you are not angry," said Hattie, in
some trepidation, as Mrs. Jenkins made no re
ply, " I promised to ask you, so I thought I
must But you needn't tell me, indeed I hope
you won't I don't see why it should be any
of their business, and I'm sure it's none of
"I am not in the least angry with you, Hat-
He, said the widow, smibng. " Though I
should advise you not to be so hasty, another
time, in giving your promise, inasmuch as this
occasioned you so much uneasiness, you may
tell these ladies, that I will invite them to take
tea at my house to-morrow afternoon and that
I will then and there answer that important
question, I trust, to their entire satisfaction.
You may come, too, Ilattie," she added, as
the young girl caught up her hat preparatory
to making a hasty exit
This message was received by the aforesaid
ladies with mingled surprise and self-congratulation.
With surprise, because Mrs. Jenkins
had, hitherto, stood steadily aloof from the so
ciety ; because she had been so uncharitable
as to declare it to be nothing but a " school
for scandal," and that it accomplished far more
mischief than good. With self-congratulation,
because they felt, to use Miss Wormwood's
felicitous expression, " that something was
coming now that would astonish some folks."
The next day at th.3 appointed hour found
them all quietly seated in Mrs. Jenkins' pleas
ant little parlor.
Mrs. Jenkins received them with her usual
ly sociable, and seemed to be particularly de-
siroiis of making her guests feel perfectly at
home. But there was a certain constraint in
their manner, but especially in their tongues,
which were more than usually quiet, and their
minds seemed to be solemnly impressed with
the important disclosure that was about to be
made. Every time their hostess opened her
mouth to speak all eyC3 were fixed upon her
in eager expectancy, and as there fell from her
lips some casual remark, as far as possible from
the subject of their thoughts, their disappoint-
ment was evident
But the widow seemed to be quiet uncon
scious of all this. She looked as cool and com
fortable in her simple white muslin, laughed
as gaily and chatted as though there was no
such a person as Dr. Wells in existence, and
nothing in the mystery of his disappearance
that she was expected to clear up.
The afternoon wore slowly away, and Mrs.
Jenkins led her guests ont to .the supper table,
whose bountifully spread board seemed to
have a benign effect upon those for whom it
was pro ided.
As they seated themselves around it, and
sipped the fragrant nectar, vulgarly called tea,
their heart began to expand under its genial
influence, and they all commenced with one
accord, to praise the light and crisp biscuits,
the spicy loaf cakes, the delicious custards and
preserves, fcc, which they severally declared
were the best they had ever tasted. All of
which were made by the small, white hands
of their hostess, who was a notable little house
keeper, and though she kept one servant, gen
erally spent a part of each morning iu the
The pretty widow bore the honors very
meekly ; though she did not, in accordance
with the time-honored custom, declare, " that
there was nothing on the table fit-to eat and
that she was really afraid that none of them
would be able to make out a supper."
But the supper, like all sublunary joys, came
to an end at last, and the whole party adjourn
ed to the parlor. As soon as they seated
themselves, a deep silence reigned, for they
perceived by the widow's look and manner
that she was about to speak.
This time Mrs. Jenkins did not disappoint
them. " Ladies," she said, in a tone that in
stantly secured their attention, " I have un-
you are all very anxious to
know why I haven't married Dr. Wells.
Have I been correctly informed ?"
" Yes, my dear Mrs. Jenkins," said Miss
Dorthy Wormwood, who, being President of
the " society," and " accustomed to sneak in
public," volunteered to become spokesman for
the rest, "you are. Not from motives of cu
riosity, oh, no, we are above such feelings, but
because we are anxious that the villain should
unmasked who has so basely deceived us.
That in case he should return, which God for
bid, he should not be allowed to desecrate
with his unholy presence our virtuous and
Having given vent to this burst of eloquence
the amiable spinster leaned back in the chair,
and subsided into a solemn silence, whose dig
nity struggled unsuccessfully with the impa
tience distinctly visible in every glance of the
keen restless eyes, and iu each line of the sharp
Mrs. Jenkins continued ; " In order that I
may relieve the disinterested and highly com
mendable anxiety which has so distracted
your minds for some weeks past, and silence
the many rumors to which it has given rise, I
have concluded to answer that important ques
tion to the best of my ability, upon two Con
ditions. The first is that the secret which I
shall unfold to you be strictly confined to your
This was said with a look and tone of great
solemnity, and as the reader will readily im
agine, it produced a corresponding degree of
curiosity and excitement in those who heard
They all, individually and collectively, bo
gan immediately to declare " that they would
never breathe a syllable to any living being I"
Miss Wormwood heroically adding, " Not if
she was to be stretched wpon the rack?-
Which, as there was little danger of the oc
currence of that rather unpleasant alternative,
seemed to be somewhat superfluous.
" My other condition," resumed Mrs. Jen
kins, " is that none of you ask me another
question concerning it."
This last condition was harder to be com
plied with ; but as the widow declined to pro
ceed without it, they gave their consent te
" Then ladies," said Mrs. Jenkins, speaking
slowly and distinctly, "I will inform you thai
the reason why I haven't married Dr. Wells,
is because he has never asked me "
So completely absorbed were these ladies
m this anxiously expected revelation, that
they had not noticed that, they had an addi
tion to their number, in the form of a tall, fine
looking gentleman, who had stood for a few
moments on the threshold of the half opened
door, evidently uncertain as to whether he
had better advance or retreat. Neither did
the widow observe it, until at the conclusion
of her sentence, she raised her eyes, and met
the gaze of the large and handsome pair that
were fixed upon her countenance, in which
there was a singular blending of mirthfulness
The consciousness that he had heard what
she had said, sent the warm blood to her
cheeks, but she did not lose, otherwise, the
quiet self-possession that characterized her
Dr. Wells, for it was he. had already receiv
ed an inkling of the rumors that were afloat
cencerning him, sO he was at no loss to un
derstand the present Mate ot affairs. But
without appearing to notice the evident con
sternation of the company at his unexpected
entrance, lie turned to the widow, and said
quietly, " Good evening. Mrs. Jenkins. I
rang twice- at the door, but receiving no at
tention, and hearing the sound of voices with
in, I eutured to enter uunannounced."
Then, without waiting for a reply, he turn
ed to the rest of the company, and inclining
his head remarked. " I believe that I owe
an apology to some of my good friends here
for alarming illness of a near relative will
prove, I am confident, to such kind and char
itable hearts a sufficient excuse."
A deep silence followed these words, which
was broken by Miss Dorthy AVormwood, who
rising from her seat, said, " That it was get
ting dark, and she guessed that she would
have to be going."
Whereupon a number of others stood up
declaring, that they " had no idea that it was
So, one by one, they stole ont, confusion
upon their countenances, and shame and dis
comfiture in their hearts, leaving the doctor
and the widow to themselves.
Now we would not have the reader suppose,
for one moment that we would be guilty of
such a breach of confidence as to relate the
conversation that followed; beside'', we are
well aware, though the most delightful thing
imaginable to the parties themselves, that it
sufficiently flat and stupid to everybody else,
especially when put upon paper. But this
we may safety say, that if the widow Jenkins
didn't marry Dr. Wells, it icasn'l because he
didn't aslc lur!
DIDN'T MARRY DR. WELLS. All Sorts of Good Reading.
A Michigan Captain Captures Thirteen Live
At daybreak this morning our regiment
(3d Michigan Cavalry) left Hamburg Land
ing, three miles from the field of Shiloh, and
two miles from Pittsburg Landing,) from our
advanced pests on the road to Corinth; and,
having reached our destination, but before the
regiment had formed in line where we were
to camp, the news came that the enemy were :
driving in oar pickets, which needed no further
confirmation than the volleys of musketry that
came echoing along the woods from a south
erly direction. Orders came at once for two
companies of our regiment, and two compa-
nies of the Seventh Illinois Cavalry, to be im- j
sent to assist the pickets and repel j
the attack. Col. Mizner detailed Company L, j
Captain T. II. Botham, and Company M, Capt.
Thos Sailor, to assist in the service to be per-
formed, and they, with the two Illinois com-
panies, all under the command of Major W. ,
S. Barton, also of the Third, one ol the cool- I
est and most accomplished officers, went for-
ward at a rapid galbp, and were soon in the j
direct vicinity of the rebel cavalry, which was :
aoout three hunareu stroii?. as we aitprwaras
learned. The rebels were posted in a thick '
wood, but in their rear the country assumed j
more the character of " oak openings," for the !
distance ot a mile, and then again came tne
almost impenetrable underbrush, covering low I
marshy ground. One of the Iowa companies
the foe in front, the olher took off to !
the left, while companies L and M, by a rapid '
detour to the right, attempted to gain their j
rear. Meantime the firing was brisk in front,
and the latter companies urged their horses
forward at the top uf their speed, but the
enemy soon espied their movement, and turn
ing their horses, clapped spurs to them, and
away they flew in the direction of Corinth.
Forward dashed the Federal cavalry in pur
suit The race at once became exciting.
They had the start of us, but we kept firing
at them, and finally, with drawn sabrs, we
were among them. The first " secesh' blood
drawn, flowed from a long-legged chap in
butternut habiliments, who dismounted and
attempted to gain a thicket at the right, but
Captain Botham, who led the advance, was
too quick for him, and giving him a handsome
blow that laid open his skull and a portion of
his neck and head, put him in a condition that
rendered his capture perfectly easy. Anoth
er tellow in the everlasting butternut, strove
hard to escape, but a well mounted Illinois
boy dashed up to his side and ordered him to
halt. Nothing heediug, on he went, faster
and faster, the command to halt was repeated
with no result, when the Federal clapped his
revolver just back of the poor wretch's ear,
and firing, sent a ball quite through his head.
The horse gave a leap at the report, the body
rolled out of the saddle, and when we return
ed, lay stark and stiff where it had fallen. Ou
we Went, over hills, and logs, and gullies,
while, meantime, the rebels separated, one
party keeping straight forward, the other
varying off to the right; and now occurred, I
will venture to say, one of the most gallant
and daring feats of personal bravery that the
annals of this war can furnish.
Captain Botham, who was finely mounted,
pursued the rebels who bore off to the right,
and with the cry, " Come on boys 1" gave his
horse rein and spur, and quickly disappeared
in the wood through which their course lay.
He was followed by two or three of our cav
alry, Captain Sailor taking the same direction
with his company. But Captaiu Botham,
without hat, his face glowing with excite
ment, his saber flashing aloft, outstripped all
save the three men in question, and went fly
ing after the frightened foe, now fairly on the
Corinth road. The chivalry ran well, but the
mnd-sills gained upon them every instant.
The party numbered about fifty strong; and
in the mad race they threw away their blan
kets, haversacks, and, in some instarce their
revolvers, carbines, and sabers. Like all re
connoitering parties, they were all armed to
the teeth. At the end of the first mile the
Captain left botli of his companions behind,
and about the time the half of the second mile
was accomplished he came up with the rear
of the flying column, yelling at the top ot his
voice.. By a single blow with his saber, he
killed the first man he reached, the good blade
cleaving his skull ; but just at this lime ob
serving a road that led into a field on the
right, in order to avoid a stretch of the high
way that was very bad, he dashed into it, and
by the maneuver headed off about thirty of
the rebels, crying out to them to surrenderor
ha would cut them all down, at the same
time swinging his sabre madly around his
head. They drew rein at ouee. and there he
stood nhne wi'h them, aud in a loud voice
bade them throw down' their arms and sur
render. Meantime, one-half of them, when
they found themselves headed off, turned
down a road to the left But their captor
put a stop to this by swearing that if another
man left he would shoot him dead in his sad
dle. The two cavalrymen who started with
Capt. Botham now came up and disarmed the
prisoners. Upon counting them the Captain
found that he had bagged thirteen live "sccesh'
single-handed and alone! Has the feat been
beaten during the war? Thirteen of their
cavalry taken by a single mud sill! Upon
each of the prisoners was either a haded pis
tol, a hailed airline, or a sabre. They were
never more completely panic stricken. They
were all safely brought to camp. Eight or
ten others were also taken, and four or five
killed and wounded. None of our men re
ceived a scratch, although several of our hors
es, were wounded. Cor. Detroit Advertiser.
Pulpit Politics and Parson Brownlow—Yancey
and the Parson.
catechise him.'' " No." But the crowd hal
mediately loed to Yancey, "Brownlow is here, but he
ha", not nerve enough to mount the stand
where you are." I rose and marched up the
you are acting witu once tooK Jesus i. urist up 1
upon a mount (uproarious laughter) and !
said to the Savior, look at the kingdoms ol !
the world. All this I will give thee if thou !
will tall down and worship me. " Now, Sir,'' j
said, " His reply to the devil is my reply to j
Bit a few weeks prior to the Presidential
Election, the- announced in their papers that
the great bull of the whole disunion flock was
to speak in Nashville a man, the tw first
letters of his name are W. L. Yaneey a fol
low that the Governor of South Carolina par
doned out of the State prison for murdering
his uncle, Dr. Earl. He was announced to
speak, and the crowd was two to one Union
I had never spoken to him in all my
life. He called out in an insolent manner
Is Tarson Brownlow in this crowd ?" The
disunionists halloaed out, " Yes, he is here."
" I hope,"' said he, " the Tarson will have the
nerve to come upon the stand and have me
steps and said, " I will show you whether I
have the nerve or not" " Sir," said he and J
he is a beautdul speaker, and personally a very j Jn
fine looking man" are you the celebrated j
Parson Brownlow?" "I am the only manljniT.
on earth," I replied, " that fills the bill 1"
(Laughter.) " Don't you think." said Yancey,
vou are oartiy emmovea as a nreacuer. a
man of your cloth, to be dabbling in poliucs,
and meddling with State affairs?" "Nosir,"
said I ; "a distinguished member of the party
you, " Get thee behind me, Satan." (Renew
ed laughter and applause.) I rather expect
ed to be knocked down by him ; but I stood
with my side to him, and a cocked Derringer
in my breeches pocket. I intended if I went
off the scaffold that he should go the other
way. (Cheers.) ''Now sir," I said, "If you
are through, I would like to make a few re
marks." ' Certainly, proceed," said Yancey.
"Well, sir, you should tread lightly upon the
toes of preachers, and you should get these
disunionists to post you up before you launch
out in this way against preachers. Are jou
aware, sir, that this old gray headed man sit
ting here, Isaac Lewis, the President of the
meeting, who has welcomed you, is an old
disunion Methodist preacher, and Buchanan's
pension agent here, who has been meddling
in politics all his life time?" "Sir" said L,
"are you aware that this man, James P.
Thomas, on my left, is a Breckinridge elector
for this Congressional District ? He was turn
ed out of the Methodist ministry for whipping
his wife and slandering his neighbors." "Sir,"
said I, " are yor aware that this young man,
sitteng in front of us, Colonel Loudon C.
Haynes, the elector of the Breckinridge tick
et for the State of Tennessee at large, was ex
pelled from the ministry for lying and cheat
ting his neighbor in a measure of corn ?"
" Now," said I, " lor God'3 sake, say nothing
more about preachers nntil you know what
sort of preachers are in your own ranks."
From Parson Eroicnhic's Xew Tori Speech.
Bonner and His Fast Horses.
FASHION COURSE, Tuesday, May 13.
reat re;;ef tome'"
Huntsman of Attercliff, near Sheffield (Eng
enKaged land), was the first, in 17W to make raststeel.
He kept hi process recret for ten ypars after
Warren ast weckj anJ caIlcd t the Trac,
Uoafe on hu way to his home in Virin;a
the course of conver.,a,ion he mentioned
that Mr S!iJeU approacilpj him one day sav.
ijr 10Tr ;s it that vnu" never
dl?nk or fmok(;? auJ j nolice tiat j-0u never
wear Whv do vou not swear ?' ' Oh' said
Thk feature of the day, however, was a bit
of sport not in the programme, and which no
one had looked for. He of the Ledger, the
Bonner, the great Bonnet who has not yet
been headed in the Weeklies, nor on the road
behind a gay pair of trotters with the ribbons
in his own hands showed on the track with
his equine wonders Lady Palmer and Flat-
bush, of " vast renown." Handling the rib
bons, he gave the throng a tasle of both his
and his horses' quality.
After a preliminary turn of a rn;;e he halt
ed before the stand, and asked the judges of
the race just over to time him, and away he
set his horses spinning at a rate that no double
but Bonner's can do. He went without a
skip throuh the first mile, well in hand, and
with a pace to spare, until near its end, when
a chirp quickened them for a. spirt to the stand,
to which they came in 2:32f. Tha first mile
over, the gay and noble pair rushed into their
bits and flew away as no others, in double, to
the pole, could fly, with steady stride, and
never a break or a flaw of pace, dashed thro'
the mile and passed the stand in 2:29.
Clapping of many hands, waving of fair
handkerchiefs by the fair hands of delighted
ladies, and the shouts of strong lungs, greeted
the noble horses as they came home in so gay
aud so grand a manner ; aud when the sig
nal went up with 5 m. 1J s. as the time of the
miles done by a pair of gentlemen's horses,
again the air vas filled with huzzas, again fair
hands waved white handkerchiefs, and fair
lips smiled applause at so noble a feat The
throng had seen what no other throng had
ever before seen, and could only be wild with
delight Mr. Bonner then announced that he
would give any gentleman, ho, driving his
own pair, should go two' miles beating 5 m.
sea, the magnificent prize of ten thousand
dollars, a willing gift for the pleasure confer
Our readers will recollect that this great
feat is not Bonner's first great one, for last
October, with the same pair, he trotted over
the same course a mile in 2m. 27s. This feat
of yesterday, like that of last year, was z pub
lic display, and scores of watches told the tale
of flight that Bonner had done. To these we
may add another yet more wonerful. A few
days since this same pair did a single mile on
the Fashion Course in 2m. 20s. X. 1'. Trib
une. A Tucsty Bkac. A lady last uight was
walking briskly down Chestuute street, evi
dently upon business. A magnificent black
and white Newfoundlander walked by her
side. Having no arm to give her, he held
end of her handkerchief, by way of sub
stitute, in his teeth. He kept an eye and a
half upon his- charge, and used the other upon
the sidewalk loafers who scanned the lady as
she passed. At Eighth and Chestnut streets,
where gamblers often congregate in the even
ing to " rope in" greenhorns to a crib in Wal
nut street, near Eleventh, a two-legged pup
py made a motion toward the lady, when
doggy showed a set of ivories that caused
the loafer to turn his back at sudden notice.
As the quadruped walked along he seemed
ProuJ of tbe char, while the lady, we opine,
felt quite as safe as if leaning upon the arm
a husband. Philadelphia Xorth Ainerintn
' I have pnoii"
to make me hum-
wiihout. adding that eil.' ' Well,' said
Mr. Slidell, you don't know how good it is
sometimes. I advise you to try it It is a
Col. Phelps on Arming Negroes.
Cot. Phei,p3 of Missouri, the gallant and
loyal member of Congress" from the Spring
field District Tvho led a regiment of loyal
Missourians in the battle of Pea Ridge, made
a speech m Congress the other day, on tha
question as to whether negroes should ba
armed. He said :
Tin's is a war of white men, not of Indiana
and negroes, and the proposition to employ
negroes to fight against white men is worsa
than one to employ Indians to fight against
white men. Daring the American Revolu
tion, when a proposition was made te em
ploy savages for the purpose of putting down
the rebellion of the thirteen colonies, it was
denounced in the British Parliament The
slaveholders of a majority of them, were the
last to give in to this rebellion, but thos
who from the first plotted this rebellion plac
ed themselves at once at the head of the State
governments in nearly all the Southern States.
They had the executive and other State offi
ces, and they cont. olled the legislature, and
they could do, therefore, whatever they saw
fit to do. When the people of the seceding
States met iu convention and passed the ordi
nance of secession, by which they declared
that they no longer owed allegiance to thU
government, they enacted, the condition fn
which they placed. There are laws on the stat
ute books ofevery State punishing persons for
treason against their State government, and
a Union man in any one of these rebellious
States, if he had risen up to assert the supre
macy of the United States, and declared al
legiance to the government, would thereby
subject himself to throe old puniiments:
First, the punishment of treason against the
so-called confederate government j secondly,
for treason against the government of his
State ; and, third, the punishment of being
arrested by the military authorities, either of
the confederate government, to do service or
be despoiled of his property. As to the em
ployment of negroes, the people were compell
ed to give the labor of their servants to aid in
tlie construction of fortifications and intrench
menta in the vicinity of the rebel armies.
They did not do so willingly. They were
coerced by military authority, for the people
themselves, or a majority, of them, were
opposed to th rebellion. It would be wick
.l and unjust to turn the arm; ol these negrrea
agaiust their former owners 011 the plea that
they were opposed to an! in arms against
Ox the first day of May, eggs sold in Eicli
mind, Virginia, according to the Richmond
Examiner, for twenty-five cents per dozen,
and butter for a dollar and a half a pound.
High as these prices appear, they are not x
horbitant in comparison with the prices de
manded for butchers' meat, bacon, groceries,
dry goods, wood, etc. Butchers' meat was
held, according to quality, as between thirty
five and a half and fifty cents a pound ; bacon
(hog round) thirty five cents; common brovtn
sugar, forty cents; and firewood, from county
carts, sold at the rate of twelve dollars a cord.
In the way of dry goods, we give a few in
stances: Unbleaeed cotton is sold at front
twenty-five to thirty-seven and forty cents a
yard, according to the conscience of the dry
goods man ; bleached cotton from thirtv-Sve
to forty cents per yard ; spool cotton, two
dollars a dozen ; Iru-h linen, from seventy
five cents to one dollar and a quarter a yard,
and domestics at fiftv ceuts a rard.
A Sctper given at the Astor House recent
ly, was attended by Parson Brownlow, Capt.
Bailey, famous as the- second in command
under Commodore Farragut and other celeb
rities. During the festivities, the Capt was
called upon for a speech. One who was pres
ent thus reports it:
Now the Captain is the reverse of Parson
Brownlow in figure and manner. He is a
rotundity, and there is no "forty thousand
parson power" of talking in him. I believe
somebody pried him up with a handspike or
some way, and he undertook to make, a
speech. It is no detraction from Dr. Hitch
cock, who made a most eloquent one just be
fore, to say that the Captain's told better,
from pure want of words. "Gentlemen.'
said he, as ha nervously twisted his naj.kin
into a hard rope and hesitated between his
words " I don't claim any more than my
share we don't any of us we all 'want
what belongs to us and no more. Farragut
did it he planned it all out; all we had to
was to obey his orders; that's just what
we did. As to tbe particulars, the way of it
was was well, we had a jolly good fight !"
Whereupon the gallant Captain Jumped him
self into his chair.
Congressman and Torpedoes.
A good joke occurred about Congressmen
this afternoon. A Michigan Colonel was -in
command of the guard. Ciii-sens were pro
hibited admittance. Several came up and
asked the corporal to pasn them, saying that
thej' were Congressmen. The corporal stat
ed the case to the Colonel.
"They are Congressman, arc they?" asked
" So they say."
" Well, let them pass and go where they
please," said the Colonel. Let them tramp
torpedoes, go into the magazines and where
there U any prospect of their being blown
the devil, for that is th" pnickest way to
end the war. YorMown Correspondence.
A judicial election takes pku-e in Kentucky
this month. An order from General Halleck
requires that all candidates who are Seces
sionists or Rebel sympathizers sh;dl be arrested.