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Jpe WritixxU Ipailu. gagle: jguMay Pmmg, "gtextlx. 16, 1890.
ST. PATRICK fN IRELAND.
Ho camo there a stranger.
God cent hun.
And the light lie kindled
lias since lived.
It will not dio
While lives a Celt.
B03. F. Walsh.
Oh J did you no'er hear of the ''Blarney"
9njat"i found near the banks of Killarney?
Believe it from me,
No girl's licart li. free,
Once she hears the sweet !ound of the Blarney.
For tho Blarney's so great a deceiver,
That a girl thinks you're there, though you leave
And never finds out
All the tnckB you're about,
Til she's, quite goue herself with your Blarney.
ft I I
mi mmm hw
: 7W VfoY imtigkWfi,
Oh' say, would you find this same "Blarney?"
XhTC's a castle not far from Killarney,
On tire top cf its wall
(Uut take care- 3-011 don't fall),
There's a. btonc tlsnt contains all this Blarney.
JJko a magnet, its influeaccsuch is,
hat attraction it gives nil it touches.
If you kiss it, they say,
From that blessed day
may Kiss whom you pleaso with your
Blarney. Samuel Lover.
A TRUE STOttY or ST. 1'ATKICK'S DAT.
ICopyriqht, JS90, by American Press Association.
T WAS St. Pat
rick's day at Bal-
liii spittle. Tho
air was crisp and
tho day bright,
and tho little
church was filled
dren of Erin. Tho
good priest dcliv
' crcd an oration
on their patron
M5 saint, and when
"the mass was
ZZz.-znr-3 -" ' over and tho
usaal Rood intentions made tho rosy
cheeked, gayly dres&ed country giilsand
tall, broad shouldered young men, all
"decked in their best," streamed out of
tho Tillage church and crowded the lit
tle chapel yard, forming a splendid
grouping of the brawn and beauty of tho
sons an J daughters of St. Patrick.
"Man passed out through tho chapel
gate and encountei ed the usual string of
bog T.irj. who haunt tho roads that lead
to the churches ou all holidays, but par
ticularly on this one.
Among those who made such speedy
exit was Myles O'Hanlon. lie was not
in excellent humor, in fact ho was un
us lalh motoso and ih tempered, and ho
pa'J&id quickly through tho throng and
enteiod the public house of Terence Mur
phy. In the "taproom" there was no
one but the lady of the house, and when
XI lb entered she looked at him search
ingly, "V. isha! Myles, an' is it going to break
year pledge, ye are?' she asked.
" l es. ma'am,"' replied her visitor. "I'm
not fit lin well; an', if ye plaise, I'll tako
a small tint of whisky."
Th" old lady was uo in a particular
hurry to serve her customer; she was
ratl'er inclined for gossip, and asked:
"W.iclvate Connell at masui, Myles? They
tell me ye're pulling a string together.
But if I were you I'd go slow. Dan
Comu II is a hard man. an' t2 boy that
gels Kate'll have to mind hiukelf better
tiiAU t i break his pledge.'
"Mrs. Murphy," said Myles, "what's
b"t e n mwelf an' Kate is our own af
fair, aa j ou'll oblige me by not mention
in it agm. I'm not breakin' me pledge.
But I have tho colic an' want something
to hi i the pain. Sure Father Dnnlea
lmisi'lf would forgive me for takin' a
This appeal was irresistible; the land
lady poured out tho whisky and Myles.
h-ving taken, the medicine, left tho
hou. lie did not return to the chapel
yard, whew a meeting of the athletic as
sociation was to be held wh?u the priest
had finished breakfast. And many an
inquiry was made for him, for Myles was
th? president of the association.
Through the laneway that led to the
prieat's house Father Dnnlea could now
be soon coming toward' tha meeting, and
stdl the president did not put in an ap
pearance. Thf committee could not un
dt Ktaud it. They had seen him at mass.
"Whai, had become of him? Boys were
sent to las home at Garrcttstown, about
a mile away, and through the village,
and one member of the committee, know
ing of Myles infotuaticn for prettv Kate
Cona.'.n, ined him to her father's cottage
with the hope of finding there the miss
ing one. But ali were unsuccessful, and
the meeting began and ended without
the presence of their popular president.
In tho afternoon there were ts be ath
letic sports oa tha beautiful strand at
Garrettstswn, All tho country side was
to be there. But 8 o'clock camo and
assod. and bo wes still absent from his J.
t: VH u i it3irt tSaJrzrf'-yr'Tr S
Ajjy" j JlJZzr-Z4h)
to UK ' ft
a h I Hcf
mil h i
duties. His friends began to feel uneasy,
and his old father, who came to the
strand to see his boy win some of the
prizes was particularly anxious about
There were athletes from Kinsale and
Timoleague and other towns and vil
lages; and on the sandy beach, beside
tho frowning cliffs of Kilcoleman, shel
tered by the picturesque wooded hills of
Garrettstown, and facing the ever heav
ing ocean, were gathered together thou
sands of Ireland's prettiest daughters
and finest sons. There were there people
of every class of society, from the popu
lar landlord to the laboring man, from
the parson to the priest's altar boy.
But where was Myles O'Hanlon?
The question was on a thousand
tongues; but it seemed to ba unanswer
able. He was considered to be the best
runner and hurler in the parish, and on
him the neighbors relied to keep the
laurels in Courcies; but the sports be
gan and ended; not one prize remained
in the parish of Courcies, and sad were
the hearts of the good people of Ballin
spittle and Garrettstown. But now that
it was all over, the friends of Myles
gathered together in little groups and J
discussed the strangeness of his absence.
Father Dunlea was as anxiously nervous
about him as was his old father, and, in
reply to a query from some uncharitable
rival, he said indignantly:
"Myles O'Hanlon is not drinking. He
has the pledge since he was a child, and
early this morning, when the dew was
upon the grass, he picked the shamrock
I'm wearing aud said to me: 'Father,
I'm thinkin' we'll keep the association
cup in Courcies today.' But what has
happened the boy I can't understand."
This silenced the evil thinking ones,
and proved that at least it was the in
tention of Myles to be at the sports.
Something must have happened to
him. So thought everybody. But no
one could suggest a solution of the mys
tery. Suddenly old Tim O'Hanlon,
Myles' father, went to Father Dunlea and
said to him: "Begor, yer reverence, I'm
thinkin' that maybe ould Dan Connell's
daughter has somethin' to eay to it."
"Why?" inquired the priest.
"Because, yer reverence, she refused
him last night. There was a dance up
at Moll Daly's, tho match maker's sav
ing yer presence an' I hear tell that
ould Connell gave Moll tin shiilin's to
make a match for Kate wid Johnny
Hurley, the butcher."
This did not throw much light on the
subject. But Father Dunlea knew well
that Myles had "a tender spot in his
heart for Kate;' he was looking forward
to having a fine wedding at Shrovetide,
and although Connell did ni like to give
his daughter to a man who had not a
farm, he believed that this breach could
ha filled up, and he had decided to use
his good endeavors Cowards that end.
Turning to old O'Hanlon he said:
"Tim, when did you hear that Kato
"I didn't hear it at all, your reverence;
but be tho signs of Myles' face last night
an' this morning I guessed it. But 'twas
himself told me that the ould fellow gave
Moll Daly the tin shiilin's. He was look
in' very bad, sir."
Hero the old man ceased talking, but
just as the priest was turning from
hiin and about to leave tho strand ho
hobbled up to him and said: "I beg yer
reverence's pardin. But I didn't seo
Kate Connell at the sports, yer rever
ence." To Father Dunlea there was more in
formation in this sentence than in all
the surmises that had yet been spoken,
and he hastily questioned himself: "I
wonder could they have run away?" He
decided to have that thought speedily
answered, and walked quickly in the
direction of the village. Arriving there,
he did not delay to go homo and have
dinner with the party he had invited at
the Eports. He "v ent into Terence Mur
phy's public house and, asking the land
lady for a sheet of paper and an envel
ope, he wrote a short note to his sister
desiring her not to delay the dinner for
him, but if he was not there in time to
explain to his guests that ho was de
tained on urgent parish duties. Having
sent this letter by a boy, he said, good
humorcdly, to Mrs. Murphy:
""Well, Mary, you didn't do much busi
"Iso, your reverence; the boys were all
down on the strand at the sports. Sorra
the wan had a tint of whisky but Myles
The priest started painfully, and in
quired: "Did he drink much. Mary?"
"Oh, no, yer reverence. "Twas just
after mass he came in an' told mo he had
a colic savin' yer presence an he only
took it for physic."
A LITTLE MEDICEnTE:.
This alloyed the pastor's fears a little;
but he went straightway from Terence
Murphy's into every public house in the
village, and wa3 relieved to learn that
Myles had not been in any one of them
But ho learned something else that
concerned liim gravely and seemed to
corroborate his first thoughts on hearing
that Kate was not at the sports. JKddy
Green, the keeper of the hotel, told him
that when he was coming home from
Kinsale. about 2 o'clock, he saw Myles
and Kate at the cross near the Sandy
cove road, and that they seemed to be
talking very earnestly about something.
Quickly Father Dunlea went to Con
nell's house, but his surprise was as great
as his joy when Kate herself opened the
"You're welcome, father," said the
lovely girl, as she dusted a chair for the
reverend gentleman. "I'll tell mo fsJier
"Xo, my cliild," interrupted her visi
tor, "I wish to speak with you. Now,
Kate, I want you to tell me tho plain
truth. Did you refuse to marry Myles
O'Hanlon last night?"
The girl blushed and toved with her
apron and stood before the priest looking
sheepishly and silently at the ground.
"IThv don't xoa answer me. Kate?'"
' glliik , ill!
ioHfi!-.. if f
aeeiunorme Brave wnoDaibiesu
for Irish right in
lo trust except fcir quenchless wl
Hn nntoiPr ;ap in
f.UV j-wii UU1V UiUiV.il ItUllUi iiunuo.
t SACWOsni.ra0W - .fla.
"I did not refuse him, father, but"
"But what, Kate?1'
"Me father tould him that he would
never let me marry him, as he hadn't a
farm, and he gave Moll Daly ten shillings
to make a match for me with young Hur
ley, the butcher."
At this the young girl burst into tears,
and the good priest soothed her as best
he could. When sho had grown com
paratively calm he said to her:
"Did you see Myles today?"
"Yes, father; I met him after mass
and we tonL a walk."
The girl was answering his questions
truthfully, lie believed; but ho was now
certain that she knew something of the
causes that kept Myles away from the
sports, so he asked her:
"Do you know, Kate, that Myles was
not at the sports today and that the par-
REITSE TO MARRY
is?h relied on liim to win the associion
"I do, father."
"Well, as you saw him last, do you
know where he is?"
This question was a little too straight
and Kate winced under the priest's keen
gaze. But ho repeated it and she re
luctantly answered, "He was sick today
sir, and maybe ho went into Kinsale tc
Bee a doctor."
"I have been told that he was feeling
unwell and what you say is quite possi
ble; but what I want to know is this do
you know where ho is now?"
Again the girl lowered her eyes and
nervously rolled up and unrolled her
apron string and kept silent. Again
Father Dunlea lepeated his question, and
Kate, timidly, yet v. ith determination,
replied: "Yes. father, I do; but I can't
tell you." This leply was more than the
good father expected; it was now his
time to feel nervous, and he positively
quailed before the superb beauty of this
young girl as she stood there, in defiance
of him, defending her lover's secret.
After a moment or two he said, "Kate,
I do not think you are wise to withhold
this from me. You know how I love
that boy, and it was a pleasing thought
for me, when I knew that ye were lov
ers, to look forward to marrying you.
I was well aware that vour father did
not like Myles, because he has not a
farm; but I hoped to be able to talk him
into it. Now. my dear girl, please tell
mo where is he?"
The girl blushed furiously during this
sneech of Father Dunlea: but she had
promised to lreep lier lover s secret, and
she was in a quandary of nervousness
as to what she should say.
At last her Irish genius came to her
rescue and the said: "I cannot tell you
where Myles is, your reverence. But
he'll be back again m a couple of days,
and then he'll tell you himself."
And as she said this a ilush of positive
triumph covered her face. Father Dim
lea was satisfied. He had as implicit
faith in Kate Connell as had he in Myles
O'Hanlon; and lie went to his dinner
party with a light Tiearr.
The disappearance of O'Hanlon was
almost the only topic of conversation in
the parisfc of Courcies for three davs.
Humors ot ail Kinds tilled the air. Ana
among them was one that he had com
mitted suicide "because okl Connell
would not give him his daughter." But
a surprise as in store for them. On the
morning of th third day Myles walked
into the village liale and well, and look
ing as happy as a prince. There was
with him a stranger a foreign looking
man and they both ac once proceeded
to Father Dunlea s hense.
In about an hour's time all three the
pritst, the stranger sad Myles were seen
walking across the lawn that divided the
presbytery from, the landlord's demesne,
and the busy ones of the village cooki
not understand what was on the tapis.
Soma time afterward Mr. C (the land-
Iord accompanied by ilyks. the priest
and the stranger, came down along the
1 read towards the viiiace. Irat stoopad at i
I the little lauewar wbfeh ltd to James J
ivm." A.-;.i-j-vrr rvrtrt7iv j4
"DID YOU REITSE TO MAKRY MYLES
t 1 if-i-i
Eholish I mds,
Fhpir hzkoA hanic;
- ml.l" - 3.O. rs ,fi-..-
-r'-Xf' WN??nV-( J.tt
The village was on the tiptoe of ex
citement to learn what all this meant.
Some said that perhaps the stranger was
going to buy tho farm, as O'Brien in
tended going to America.
But before evening they all knew what
had happened. The farm was bought,
but it was Myles who purchased it. It
was the best farm in tho parish, and ev
erybody' was secretly pleased that their
favoiite should "come into the place"
when Jimmy O'Brien went to America.
But everybody wus anxious to know how
or where Myles got the money to pay for
it. Perhaps I had better tell it for him.
His friend, Tom McCarthy, had been in
America for several years, and had at
the gold diggings accumulated a large
fortune. He ciino homo to see his par
ents, but they were both dead, and
Myles was the only friend of his boyhood
A MERRY "WEDDLva WAS CELEBRATED.
"When on St. Patrick's eve old Connell
refused to allow Kate to marry him "be
cause he hadn't a farm," Myles made
up his mind that ho would get one. Ho
remembered McCarthy's offer to befriend
him; and knowing that his friend was
about to retarn to America in a few days
he decided to abandon the sports and go
to Cork, where he would find the Irish
American. To him he unfolded his
scheme and McCarthr was more than
pleased to be permitted to help his friend.
Myles told him that he only wanted it as
a loan. But his friend said "very well,"
and looked serenely amused as he con
tinued: "I won't sail until after vour
marriage, Myles, and I shall go with you
to purchanse the farm."
And so it happened that old Connell's
ob actions wero removed; a merry wed
ding was celebrated by Father Dunlea,
and Tom McCarthy's wedd'ng present to
Myles and Kate was the lease of O'Brien's
form. Robert F. "Walsh.
Tobacco Clievrins Ministers.
"When Rev. Dr. Tiffany, of Minneapolis,
preached in Chicago his brethren all knev
that be loved fmo cut, because he made no
secret of tl chewing habit. He was a regu
lar attendant at those iioaaay morning "min
isters' meetings'' hich the average reporter
hate&, but which nre retdly enjoyable on ac
count of the bright sayings and ciever witti
cisms of preachers who do not think thoy ara
forbidden to indulge in a hearty laugh be
causo they occupy a pulpit. "While Dr. Tif
fany was a participant in these meetings tix
tobacco habit camo up for discussion one
morning. A well know n bishop was presid
ing. One after another tho brethren arose
and condemned tha use of tobacco in any
form. Tnen one cf them, during a lull, said
he would like to hear Dr. Tiffany5 ideas on
the subject. The big doctor arose. "I chew
tobacco," he said, "and you all know it. 2ow,
I would like to have all those who do not ust
tobacco rise in their seats." There was a
graud uprising. "Remain standing, piease,"
said the doctor, as he looked over tne cadav
erous men standing before hun. "Will those
who use tobacco please step forward herer
he said, and a half dozen sleek looking par
sons walked up and joined him. "Stand up,
bishop; you're a chewer," ho said to the pre
siding divine, and he joined the group. Dr.
Tiffany then looked over the thin feilovrs whe
tabooed tobacco, turned to the healthy look
ing men around hin? and said: "Brethren, 1
think we are doing pretty well." The argu
ment was unanswerable. Chicago Hwald.
HxatBirmtlon of History Com.
School Board Inspector Now, boys, what
is the diet of Worms! Can aay of you tell
(Dead sQeace prevails.)
School Board Inspector Sorely due of yon
can answer so simple a question as this.
Cocne now (cooxiagly), what is the diet of
Small Soy (timidly) Dad cats and
corpKaes, pfaue, arl Yeoowiae's 2"ews.
E-tlmatiMl in Hound Numbers.
Dabotaate jcooSdiBglT) Say, how much
is young Mr. Lancers worthl
Banker Friead (earaealy) In nmnd eusv-bx-s!
W!B, 111 write it do-Tva for you hare"
And etPK-etbe ressfaef seed n the j
!! Sip iOSi
THE IRISH OF CAIteHNA,
JACKSONS, COLQUHOUNS, M'DUFFIES,
M'KEMYS AND ADA1RS.
Bow a JFeolIfih Kitrj Accidentally CM a
"Wijo Thing, to ihc BeneSt of Ireland
aud America The Elood of Trro Races
Combined to Make a Splendid Third.
King James II, of doubtful memory,
did at least one very good thing, though
some writers assert that it was done by
accidentand because he was just then
angry with his noblemen. Tho wars of
Tirlogh O'Neill and other chieftains of
the north against Queen Elizabeth and
the horrible retribution exacted had left
Ulster almost an uninhabited waste.
King James refused to grant the aban
doned lands to royal favorites and great
soldiers as his predecessors had done, or
to discarded mistresses and court syco
phants as "William of Orange afterwards
did. (See Macaulay's account of the lat
ter.) King James declared he wcvdd
have the country settled with men, and
that the cultivator should own the land
or have come permanent tenure.
It was a perfect success. Some tractB
were settled entirely with English and
Scotch, others with enterprising Irish,
but still more with a mixture of the
two. Each race supplied what the
other lacked, and the result is the
Scotch-Irish race. There is a theory
that the true Irish came originally
from a southern land and retain many of
the faults and virtues of a southern peo
ple. The Highland Scotchman, on tho
other hand, was almost totally destituto
of wit and humor; poetry he had in rude
abundance, but very little appreciation
of art. His contribution to the common
stock was the habit of untiring industry.
Both races agreed in undying opposition
"What a pity there was not in England
wisdom enough to allow two such races
to blend in peace a pity for Ireland, but
her loss has been America's gain.
"Their factions," cays Sir Walter Scott,
"have been so long envenomed, and
they have such a narrow ground to do
their battle in, that they are like people
fighting with daggers in a hogshead.'
In Ireland their disposition to contend
for what they believed right was turned
into a cursd; in America they soon mad a
common cause against thfir common op
pressor. And the "how of it" is one of
tbe most curious things in history.
If any one had said in 1G92 that a Brit
ish parliament could succeed in exiling
300,000 Protestant Irish and perhaps an
equal number of Catholic Irish in such
a way as to make them fight side by side
with Cathoho Frenchmen and non-sec-
tarian colonists against the United King
dom, he would havo been denounced as
a fool. The wise men would have told
him that legislative folly might do won
ders, but it could not work miracles.
Yet that is just what parliament accom
plished; for scarcely was tho ink dry on
the treaty of Limerick (which provided
that Catholics should enjoy in Ireland
"such rights as they had enjoyed in the
reign of Charles H"), when it was vio'
lated by a series of laws that now make
honest Englishmen blush. It is needless
to repeat the black details. Says one Brit
ish writer: "Tho laws were so many and
so atrocious that an Irishman could
fccarcely draw a full breath without
breaking a law."
At the same time they fell upon tho
Presbyterians of the north, declaring all
their marriages illegal and arresting
ministers for "living in adultery" with
their own wives! On top of this camo
statutes forbidding Catholic or Protest
ant to manufacture or export to any
other country than England. The result
was a general flight of the bravest and
best the "wild geese,'' as they were
called, from the south to France and
Spain (where such names as O'Donoju,
O'Donneland Macifahon still attest thetr
talents and valor), and the men of tho
north to New England and Pennsylva
nia, where such local names a3 Antrim
and Iterry, Sligo, Tyrone and Belfast
show the origin of their families.
Later there was- a combined movement
of Celt and Saxon Irishman, Catholic,
Quaker and Presbyterian to South Caro
lina; and of all colonies sent out by the
prolific isle this probably contained the .
largest proportion of talent, courage and
persistent energy. At any rate it may
challenge comparison with any other.
It is scarcely possible to make a list of i
the names of the emigrants to South
CarcJina in 1750-70 without its seeming '
to be a partial list of America's eminent
patriots Jackson, Calhoun, O'Keliy,
McDuffie. Polk, Crockett, Houston, ,
Adair. McKcmy, McWhorter, OTarrell,
Q'Grady, McNairy. All these are of
Irish extraction, and still (some of them
Americanized by dropping the O' or the
31c) adorn the annals of their states or
In 1765 a shipload of emigrants left
Carrickferjrus for Clrarlestfe and it is
claimed that every family in it has since
been represented, and come of them
many times, in the congress of tbe
United States. On this ship were An
drew Jackson, his wife and two sons.
and two years after their location at the
"Waxhaw settlements, and after the
father's death, was born a third son.
named for his father, who was destined
to humble British pride at New Orleans,
and to slaughter (alas that it must &2&Z)
hundreds of his father's countrymen
who were in the rarka of the invaders.
A ISood of IVUd lianas.
Thjre is said to be a large bead of "rild
norses, led by a tborocghbred, bsowa to its
rtockmec as the "outlaw stodV rangia be
tween Tracks, Nevada eoesty, and PrATia,
yr. Years aso tbe stod. a fioa racer, es
caped tc tbe motmtawa, asd has sacs dnSed
captare. Br desperate reding ftockmec man
ae to gef ioto tbe bead every year tad drm
cat tin ooltx. T" bocses rmge so the bigk
est peak, byood wber catsie or tfeeepd&ea
pe. i iMty oaiy go to -mamc k a asy, ma .
Aw m !fe fits daws tbe sioestai trail as j
fajfcas tihsyeaarsB. Tbjrba"cat.tiitlr i
Allisa, fjur, your llghbrorra hair
Rests t&nglbic; oa your neck so rsrec
Oar Irish skies are- in your eyes,
My Eileen oge iiachroc
"Wbere'er I rosuij, o'er had orfoasj.
With use, for aye, abides ooe thought.
That Ood. from out bs heart of Ioto,
For me a joy has wrought.
AUaaa, desx, you're cror near;
You bnnj: me hope, ami lore. al cheer,
My Insh fay, my bloom of ilsy.
My Eiben oge ilachree.
"Where'er I stray, by sight or day,
I Laotr God's aageis rstch your sleep
And IreJoud's fftiries thronging round
Sweet virsiis over Veep.
Tho Old Pilot's Kcady TTit.
In "New Ireland" Mr. Sullivan tells of
an old pilot on tho Kerry coast who had
no license and did not know a term of
the trade, but was successful in his lim
ited area. Boarding an English vessel
one day the captain, doubting his capac
ity, asked him if he could "box the com
pass." "Oh. not in English, captain. "Wo al
ways do it hero in Irish."
Tho captain concluded that he could
notice a similarity in such terms as
"north, northeast by north," etc., oven
in Irish, and detect any imposition, and
so he said:
"Very well, do it in Irish."
But "Old John" was as shrewd as tho
captain, and so he began in the pure
Celtic, "My father, my father's brother,
my father's brother's wife," etc., when
tho captain cut him off with: "I seo you
can do it; take the ship."
Ho Had lice n to tbe Bali,
"Why, what's tho matter, Pat?" asked
an employer of his man of all work;
"wherever have you been?
"Och, to Widow Mulrooncy' ball, yer
'anner,and an ilhgant time we h&d of it.
Four fights in fifteen minutea an' a wind
up knock down wid the bye from the
'swamp' that left btttfwan whole now in
the house an' that wag on tha taykottle.
Bedad, the loikes of it maaolf has not
seen since we waked Tim Donnelly."
Bothered by American Ifastes.
'Sure an thini American bts do
bother me," ekt a newly arxrrtd Hiber
nian; "speimiily the feathered Lcindx
Tbr first -wan I msn ot ti kmnd was a
forkestme (porcspsse). I treed kirn
under a hay staofc an shot hka wid a
barn shovel. Tb first ticM I abet him I
mib&id him, an" tlx ssxt time I bit him I
hit him is the same paoe I missed bis
A Toot Stiok.
"EbSeo, what art js fatay stamV
"Only prsesteamr! TTkjv jam ware ar&ctie
fsg tas Ttsr . WSms rs j gttaz Va
SoA6: AwsJbMdHkdHML) I
Fkrst TKsam D yam imem dHtkataa
SommI Pmw-2Csv tattfa lf 1
i cxxs eSEjrr?wfri
., ...! I T
!JLtt I s
FllT IE I W f i A
A GOOD STORY OF BEAVER.
TThat Camo of im Effort of tha
to Teach tQuetto to a Prirato.
Governor Beaver ja knowa by every PIttt
burgboy in tho &ao,3l guard to boavery
strict disdplioariaa in military otiquerts and
me drilL Austin CartJn. of tha governor'!
nativatOTrn, told tlus war rendnisceaca about
him last night to scene of the delegates as tha
G. A. R. encamfKoent: Whilo Esatenant
colonel, of tho Forty-afth rejuaeat, Beaver
was one day sitting in front cf his tent, when
a slouchy looking t soldier with ill fitting uni
form caaie along, stopped and inquirod:
"Vere ish der doctorP
"Is that the way to address your superior
officer, sirP roared itoL BeaTer.
Tho German staroi at his superior oTSceT
in blaak amazement but said never a word.
"Here, sir; tako ilhis chair, You be the
colonel, and I will tcicb vc how to address
"Vas me der boss o t der rasimeatP
"Yes; tako this chair- and I will show jou
iow to act.''
Tho soldier sat down la front of tho teat.
Cob Bearer walked off a few paces, turned
about, returned to a politico in front of the
officer pro tempore, sqntxred himself arcucd,
mode a military salute !ad inquired:
"Colonel, can you lafUna mo where I cxn
find the surgeon of the rpgiraentP
The soWJer arose and, looking seriously nd,
straight at Beaver, repli td:
"Hanged if I know i there he-fttp Pitts
They Took tlto Hint.
An iasido car full of uavders was toiling
up ooo of the long bills hi rje county Wick
low. Tho ilriver leaped cbnn from Ids seat
in front and walked by tbt side of the horse.
Tho poor btsist tolled slord And wearily, but
the six lasidu were too bufly eagaffed us eou
versatooa to notice how s?ow!y the car pro
gressed. Presently tho driver opened th
door at tho rear of the car and alannned it to
again. The passengers started, but thought
tho driver wtw only assuring himself ho door
was securely closod. Again the fellow opened
tho door and sfl.-umned it to nguin. Tfte trav
elers turned around aagrilyand ask td why
he disturbed tiem in that moaner. "Ainust,"
whispered tho fellow, "don't spake & load;
sholl overbear us." "Who is sheP "Th
mare. Spake low," ho continued, puttf c? hLi
hand over bis noso and mouth. "Suije I'm
desavin' the erasure. Every tiro sh bears
tho door slammita' that way she thinks one of
yes is gottin' dotvn to walk up the bill, and
that rises her spqTits:,, The insiders toolfc tha
Charmed Him Stilt.
"Fweddy, I cawn't see what you find toaid
miah in that Miss GoUlnghnaso. She's dwtod
fully pitted with the smallpox"
"Boh Jove, ChoHy, sho caught it, dont j
know, while the was taking core of that wich
old undo that died and left huh a grreat b!
hundwed thousand doHahs, bah JoveP
The Shrewd Farmer.
And n Didn't XSrexlr It.
Mamma What is tki matter. Tommy!
Toaupy-I had the rule of th school
brought again! wu for beiac bad.
Mamma-Well, yo niutti'tf bfrbad. What
ralo was brought a&Atnst yuf
Tommy (with a fresh outburst) Way, tfee
great W yoltovr oBtt PalhuMphla Timet.
Still ThejT.Got Thar,
"Ther are two pnxoters of tiio U<rd
States stoat with but 009 leg aplea" re
"WlMtt Uwywye eftctcd tfcgjr dldRtget
thr'wjBr "betta font, t6en,"-rp3eH Btasral.
In u. ilarrg. Too.
iiarry now ata taac ioto ainur
WiUkr Tm lore affair aad Lcam ami to-,
gtthnr. Icftcle otracf ta wifldow "V7taal
"fff earreled o'r a -riMdzz bcsl
Jtjsc vsa I tt)v;L: I'd vcw is
K?-TvaArit -wok, 1 UnsA tt'yirr.
Or itdef had xtzAvit an.
My Sttie Ud read la wrath:
HV crifiwo tr&is sbe ntkA k,
XMi&sixxApptdavi, "J ct a& tKSSif
I itih 14 nvttT Visaed -
Tee ctee to fc-jjt-iidi of the ese.
Oh, ye. ytta, Ue J3ttl
Ax4tir tbowty Joo pji&-li Ohfia,
"Ton oa rs horrid, kzUtat t&2S.
I kaer y vujA to ctett rcr
Asa t)MB tay lfct lay Jeit
CfoAVs :asd esouslt V rut. ce.
"I ho-jpj lo amzvra 70& 9mr r
Itew wfck tt you wre -isUxr
ksA fpHettOf, adevs Ike htfl.
IZ&wttiCKa UMSk vest artise.
Asi thes I rrere Z hayn m. to.
Mm ftiun's mil i to Mr;
I hopi 1 T&CtgX. !, ter r3
Eat Trtii4 KaU-I mlcht-Ma brf
Ah. ? && X, tax wixi
I'd mtU4 i--e.x. h4 Z &jd61
Tea wTsft. UaT a -w Sas I vT
Testi fa Um seauti laad o wfefeh G
t-ZMl S. Tknjriiii tit J4 hetuw irbn
tbej- nso bor hi fcr rrrcloi, they til bj
tlie ei-rfl Sre, Ihsj aanA th n& at Ibrir
iktmher tabuim, tisy hear ta mMinrt
uti Umtou, torn Uasiij ar stflt nmM&.
lira Um irtiMjir Twtsz tnm
tom&A. tbe !&Qt6Us, tfc laerryOfa thi
d t0 sJi. ta4on awi ct. ukmt .
Tmmj sever tfre f lie 4(4 mtvaHmeim, ilk
fhfT jMTja, tmt Urr uzakjar. wnKtotfi,
mvnkm, tmmmMLte, HW ntocbily X Is m r
jc4 4km knt& mmtMmd mb$kl
fj"iisTi zmd hyym. ytxMdk 4&&
fisttr Mr aATt Immiwi.
- ''3 j T
Fs u v n .