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FAU oommunlcaUona .few ffcia pa-Mt
Should be accompanied by Vha nama of tot
author; not ceeeasarilr foe publication, but
M an eridance of food faith on the part of
the writer. Write only on one aide of the pt
per. Be particularly careful In firing- name
nd date to have the letters ana fig-urea pMi
"If you 'were me, and I were you.
And all the world was twisted, too.
What do you think that you would do
If j ou were mc and 1 were you V
"It 1 were you and ;you were mc,
I'd be as pood as pood could be:
I'd never fret, nor1 tease, you see,
if 1 were you and you were me."
"If vou were mc nad I rcrc you.
You Utfnk that you 'd be pood and true ?
Well, it's as easy a tiling to do
When I im I, nnd'you are you."
"Since I'm not you and you're not me,
Suppo-c we try. each day, to be
So pood that nobody can Pee
Which one is you, and w hich is me."
TWO OF A KIND.
The Love Affairs of Father
Mr. Jnoa Kenned- was pronounced
by his irfetrfls the mildest-tempered man
in Posey County, but had any of them
chanced to accompany him on his
homeward way the night on which this
chronicle opens they would have been
obliged to alter their decision. The
little gentleman trembled in every limb,
his cane swayed menacingly up and
down, and his lips heaped muttered
vituperations on the heads of imaginary
companions. His own dwelling reached,
he called hoarsely from the foot of the
'Come down; I want to sec you."
She ran down the stairs after a mo
ment's time and followed her parent
into the parlor. Her toilet she consid
ered amply sullicient for the occasion,
it consisting of a pair of stockings, a
night-dress and a shawl.
"What's the matter, pa?" (She pro
nounced it paw.)
"AVhat's the matter?" He turned
around with a burst of anger that
startled her. "What's the matter?" ho
repeated ajniin. "The matter is that
if that thieving, low-lived Mark Dickin
son enters this house again I -will shoot
every load in that revolver into his idle,
worthless, impudent carcass," empha
sizing each adjective with a resounding
blow from his cane upon the time-worn
horse-hair sofa. He paused for an in
stant, but his astonished daughter did
not speak, and he opened up the second
round. "You've had your pick of the
finest fellows in town" and to take up
with a loaling vagabond who never
earned his own boots nor even blacking
for them. Girl, girl pie began to grow
ragic, you've ruined yourself and
3'ou've ruined me; but remember grad
ually lowering his tones to the deepest
bass in his vocal repertory if he once
comes here he comes to Death! Go
to bed." " y
Glad to escape, she lost no time in
locking herself into her room, for she
was quite decided in her own mind that
her father had become suddenly insane.
Her mother had domineered over him
all the years of their married life until
the grave stood between the meek little
man and his firm-minded consort; but
Katjc assumed tlfe reins of government
as tney fell from her -mother s lifeless
hands, and followed so nobly in .her
footsteps that Mr. Kennedy's subjuga
tion had been quite as complete with
his pretty daughter for housekeeper as
during his wife's lifetime. The un
wavering docility that had characterized
him made his exhibition of rage the
more impressive. Mr. Kennedy was
the victim of a deep and humiliating
disappointment. Had not her thoughts
for weeks past been so exclusively
centered on Mark,Katie would have de
tected the fact that her father seemed
apprehensive of displeasing her. While
love had been gently besieging her
heart' the same tender passion had
made immense havoc with the similar
organ that beat in Mr. Kennedy's breast.
The Widow Garrison (the widow and
her large farm south of town) had
captivated his affections; her gracious
acceptance of his timidly offered atten
tions gave him every reason to consider
his suit successful, though a nervous
dread of incurring his daughter's dis
pleasure long deterred him from utter
ing the decisive words. But his fears
subsided when the widow casually re
marked upon her son Sam's growing
admiration of Katie, and Mr. Kennedy
recollected that ho had frequently met
the young man in his own parlor.
Should Katie many Sam she would cer
tainly not refuse to sanction her father's
tmion with her mother-in-law, and en
couraged by these reflections Mr. Ken
nedy offered his heart and hand to and
was accepted by his elderly charmer.
Her "yes" had hardly been pronounced
when Sam entered the room, his glance
falling with displeasure upon the
"Well, Sam," began happy and un
suspicious Mr. Kennedy, "how did you
leave Kate to-night?" with a surrepti
tious wink at his own dulcinea.
"I left her a deceitful, two-faced minx
as she always has been."
The explosion brought consternation
to its hearers. Mr.- Kennedy's jaw
dropped and he stared in silent dismay,
but the widow's quickened intuition
saw through her sons anger.
'Has Katie jilted you?" she asked
"I asked her to marry me and she
"Perhaps she'll change her mind,"
suggested Mr. Kennedy, hesitatingly,
after a few moments of ODmressive si-
-, - . . . . .A -
"She does, though," interrupted Sam,
sullenly, "she's engaged to Mark Dick
inson." "Mark Dickinson "
"Well, 'Mr. Kennedy," the widow
spoke deliberately, although her expres
sive black eyes hardly indicated a soul
at peace with all mankind, "if your
girl is too good for my boy I reckon Td
- better make matters even by being too
good for you, and we will be just as
comfortaDle if our two families keep a
right smart distance between them
of tor this."
Mr, KtsMty ktj)t his ted tl follow
inor (lav. PThntistpd hv his tit ot itission. I
g . , -yj L j
His daughter waited on him at first
with a feeling of anxiety that gradually
gave place to one of relief, as he showed
j no symptoms oi leiapsmg into nis con
dition or tne previous evening., one
had not expected that he would entirely
approve of her engagement, as Mark
was out of employment and had no
projjerty, but she had not anticipated
any decided action on his part. She
now began to consider herself a martyr
for 'love's sake, and went moodily
abojit the house, her nabitual tyranny
ovyr her father increasing day by dry
with her resentment.
Autumn set in and a sharp wind cul
My. Kennedy's face as he came home to
dinner. He reflected that he must have
tlie winter fuel hauled from his wood
lot down the rher; simultaneously he
noticed Mrs. Pcabody's long, trim pile
Of wood reaching entirely across her
backyard. Mr. Kennedy had felt very
I 1UUC1JI SlUUC II1U 1UIMV Villi 11SUU
his keeping; Katie's silence at home
was not calculated to cheer him, and
the old gentleman's heart gave a per
ceptible bound as he recollected what a
cheerful, engaging woman was Mrs.
Peabody. Pate favored his thought,
for at that moment Mrs. Peabody's
plump, agreeable person tilled her door
way, and she said in quite a musical
"O Mr. Kennedy, do you know of a
man who will saw my wood? I have
neglected it until I have hardly enough
to get dinner with."
"Certainly, certainly, ma'am." Mr.
Kennedy bubbled with" his joke. "Here
is a man right before you anxious for a
job. Are the saw and saw-horse
"INow, Mr. Kennedy, you know I
didn't mean for you to do it." Even
her smooth black hair and white apron
seemed to join in the smile that radia
ted from the corners of her mouth. But
Mr. Kennedy became suddenly imbued
with youthful gallantry, and in spite of
her protests he insisted upon making
his way to the woodpile, where, rheu
matism entirely lorgotten, he manipu
lated the saw and axe so energetically
that he soon deposited a generous arm
ful of neatly-prepared wood in the
kitchen, remarking facetiously: "I'll
send up a man this afternoon, unless you
want to engage mc to do the wliolo
of it" He was obliged to hapten
away to his own dinner, but
he felt more lisrht-heartcd than he had
before in weeks, and visions of Mrs.
Peabody, her comfortable house, long
woodpile, and money in the bank tilled
his mental vision all the afternoon. It
was a little strange that she had never
before occurred to him as a matrimoni
al prize, but Mrs. Peabody had been
considerably married already, and the
presence of two grave-stones in the cem
etery and a decree of divorce locked in
her bureau-drawer were enough to give
any one the impression that her experi
ence of married life must have been
sufliciently Aaried to satisfy almost any
woman. When she obtained her di
vorce from the last incumbent, Mr.
Drewgood, she hal again reverted to
the name of her first husband, Silas Pea
body, for she no longer wished to be
known as Mrs. Drewgood, and Peabody
was so much more distinguished a
name than Higley, the cognomen of
number two. She seemed very much
surprised indeed when, upon answer
ing a hesitating little ring from the
door-bell, she discovered Mr. Kennedy
upon the porch; but perfect candor
makes it necessary to state that Mrs.
Pcabody's comfortable form was attired
in her second-best black silk and a
marvel of a worked-lace apron; her hair
that evening had proved so obstreper
ous that three combings had been nec
essary to reduce it to its usual condi
tion of sleekness, and she had straight
ened her furniture and gathered stray
bits of thread from the carpet quite in
the manner of one expecting a visitor.
"I hope the man got around to take
care of your wood. I just thought I
would step over and see that it was all
right," explained Mr. Kennedv, with
an air of responsibility. "These fel
lows sometimes try to take advantage
of a woman when the- don't lind a man
around to look after her."
"Yes, it's hard for a Woman to go
through life alone." She sighed and
gazed mournfully at a figure in the car
pet. On most occasions she would have
said that it was a sharp man that could
get ahead of Miranda Peabody, but that
remark hardly seemed appropriate at
this time, and she continued to sigh and
look at the carpet until her sruost. sorrv
that he had said anything to make her J
teei meiancnoiy, remarked with anima
tion: "That's a fine portrait of Peabody
that you have up there."
Mr. Peabody's relict glanced at the
portrait with an expression of great sat
isfaction. It was one of a group. Be
low it at the left was a picture of Mr.
Higley, and at the right of the latter
was one of Mr. Drewgood. Supported
by a bracket below them was a pot of
English-ivy, the vine wandering in and
out among the frames and cords.
"Yes, it's a good likeness of Mr. Pea
body, and so it is of Mr. Higley; but I
never thought Mr. Drewgood's picture
did him justice. Mr. Drewgood is a
handsome man; they were all good
looking men. Indeed," she 6aid, with
pardonable pride, "taken all in all, I
don't think you would lind three better
looking men in Indiana."
"You wouldn't, you certainlv
wouldn't," agreed Mr. Kennedy, em
phatically. "But Mr. Drewgood," continued his
hostess, "was the handsomest of them
all. 1 must say that Mr. Drewgood is
a very fine man and a man of find man
ners." Air. jvenneay was conscious oi a
slight but very perceptible twinge of
jealousy. He had not come there to
hear Mr. Drewgood s praises. "Let me
see," he said, "it's about four years
since you and he had your your ,"
he tried to think of a delicate and suit
able phrase, but the words would not
come, --your blowout?"
"Just four years ago to-day since we
decided to separate," she answered,
smilingly, but added, in a pensive voice:
"As I said, he was a very fine man, but
he and I were not congenial. The very
day that we were married I discovered
that he took his roast beef extremely
rare, while I eat it well Gone."
"So do I," cried her listener, delight
edly. "No op but a barbarian can eat
"And he had such a passion tor raw
onions," she said, plaintively, meeting
the eyes of her guest, "it was awful.
He ate them every da-, and you will
certainly admit that it was very incon
siderate in him, when I tell you that I,
under no circumstance, ever touch an
"Inconsiderate? It was brutal." .
"But the worst of it was," she went
on, "that he wanted me to invest my
money in building houses tenements
in Indianapolis, and I made up my
mind that he was a dangerous schemer;
and although it was hard for a woman
who had buried two husbands to sat
herself square against a third, I did it,
and I have never been sorry."
"Sorry? It was the noblest act of
your life, ma'am. He didn't appreciate
you. It fires me all up to think of your
living with such -a such a smelling
scheming reprobate as ho was. Why,
if it had been me, Mrs. Peabody, I
wouldn't have eaten anything if you'd
sjiid so." Emboldened" by his indigna
tion Mr. Kennedy placed his chair
ckisr. by Mrs. Peabody's side and sat
dowt upon it.
"I hardly think I would treat yon as
badly as that," she said, coquettish!.
Mr. Kennedy's heart began to beat very
fast, and a dull red burned in his checks,
but his courage had deserted him as un
expectedly as it came, and he quite re
gretted changing his seat, as he could
not think of a word more to say. The
late partner of Drewgood was equal to
the emergency, however, and again re
verting to the spot in the carpet and the
pensive gaze, she said, so softly and
sympathetically: "1 have often thought
how lonely you must be with only that
child Katie to be society for you1 Mr.
Kennedy sighed so enthusiastically that
the newspapers on the table :it Mrs.
Peabody's elbow rustled. She hap
pened, quite accidentally, to lay her
well-shaped hand on the chair-arm next
to him, and, after an instant's hesita
tion, he covered it with his own palm.
She did not repulse his action and
waited a moment for him to speak; but
language was further out of Mr. Ken
nedy's reach than ever.
"I know the grief of losing a loved
companion." No one could accuse her
of exaggeration in that statemcut "I
know the grief of loneliness" a grow
ing tremor in her voice; "1 know tho
grief of being alone in the world." A
sob completed the testimony, and her
disengaged hand covered her face with
"Don't," said Mr. Kennedy, with
husky sympathy. "I know you've had
a hard time a good many of 'cm; but
you should never say fail; you may
be happy yet. Faint heart never won
fair lady."" He realized that; in his
efforts to b-; poetically comforting he
Was wandering somewhat from tho
point. Mrs. Peabody realized it also.
"How can I be happy?" she in
quired from behind the handkerchief.
".No une cares for me." The reflection
was so overwhelming that her whole
frame shook with sobs. Mr. Kennedy's
love and sympathy mastered his hesita
tion. He put hisarm about her waist
and drew her head upon his shoulder.
"Now, see here; can't we fix this up,
Mrs. Drewgood no, Mrs. Higley no,
I mean Mrs. Pcabady."
"Call me Miranda," murmured the
"Well now, Mirau la, you're alone
over here and I'm alone over there; and
I sav we'd better hitch up and make a
"Could you be happy with me,
Jason?" She had removed the hand
kerchief and her lips were very near
"Could I? Well I reckon I'm will
ing to try," emphasizing his answer
with a resounding kiss. How suncrior
she was to the Widow Garrison, and
what a merciful Providence had kept
him from marrying that hateful woman.
This idea brought Katie to his mind and
he did not feel quite so happy.
"Well, Miranda," he said, "I thank
my stars for bringing me over here to
night, but it's pretty late and I'll have
to go, but I'll be over to-morrow."
He started home with a variety of
emotions dubious when he thought of
Katie but jubilant when his mind
turned on Mrs. Peabody. "Jehosiphat!"
he exclaimed aloud, "She's a she's a'1
feeling about in his rather limited vo
cabulary for a sufficiently slowing ev-
.pression "she's a glorious female!" If
Katie would only not make any fuss
she might many Mark as soon as she
liked, and Mr. Kennedy would gladly
give him a situation in his store; ho
knew that in his wild rago he hail been
unjust to them both; there was nothing
bad about the young fellow he was
merery poor and out of employment
There were very fev" business openings
for young men in the little Hoosier vil
lage, and the f ascination of Katie's face
had kept him from trying his fortunes
elsewhere. But his name had never
been mentioned between Mr. Kennedy
and his daughter since that memorable
evening, and the old gentleman's habit
ual indecision and evasiveness made
him shrink from recurring to the sub
ject. "Do vou suppose Katie will object?"
asked Mrs. Peabody the next evening,
after Mr. -Kennedy had succeeded in
overcoming some other faint objections
on her part to a speedy marriage.
"Well Mr. Kennedy looked troubled
"I am afraid that is, I am rather in
clined to think that she will. Wht do
you think we had better do?"
"She need not be told until it is all
over," suggested the prospective bride.
Mr. Kennedy looked rather alarmed
at the idea of such an act of insubor
dination. "I don't quite see how we
could help it," he said, anxiously.
"You old innocent!" Miranda smiled
and pinched his arm. "You're too
honest for anything. Suppose I should
go up to Newburg for a little visit;
suppose you followed the next day to
buy goods, and when we return home
Miranda Peabody would have become
" here she stopped with quite a
maidenly assumption of modesty, but
Mr. Kenneiy delightedly finished the
sentence, 5niranda Peabody will come
back "MiraJda Kennedy. What ahead
she's got!" looking for sympathy to the
portraits of his three predecessors in
Miranda') affections. "We couldn't do
better;1' he said, patting her plump
shoulder. "What ao you say to going
up Monday? I'll come Tuesday, and
Wednesday we'll be back hero and sur
prise everybody, eh?" Mr. Kennedy
could not contain his satisfaction. Ha
Wlltal U uld shake bjpxlth. him
self; he wished he could shake hands
with the portraits even Drewgood.
He could forgive him everything now.
What would not he give to see the face
of the Widow Garrison when she should
hear the news of his marriage to Mrs.
Peabody, the wealthiest single woman
A little gentleman with a plump lady
on his arm inquired at a residence in
Newburg the following Tuesday for
Rev. Mr. Doobury.
"Yes, he is in. Do you wish to se
"Well, yes," he answered, twitching
his cane nervously, "we thought we
made up our minds that is, we ve con
"We wish to be. married," inter
rupted his companion sweetly.
"Come right in, then," said tie lady
who had opened the door. "A couple
is in the parlor now waiting until I get
some witnesses to their maniage, as I
was just going out to do, but you ill
answer just as well."
They were met at the door of tho
Barlor by the clergyman, to whom Mr
Kennedy made his most deferential
bow, and was about to state his busi
noss when his glance fell on ihe couple
at the opposite side, of the room. "Jo
hosiphat!" he ejaculated, and stood as
"It will do you no good to follow us,
Mr. Kennedy," said Mark Dickinson
hotly. "You cannot prevent our mar
riage if you try."
"Prevent it?" cried Mr. Kenned,
darting like a shot across the long room
and shaking both of Mark's hands over
and over again. "Prevent it?" he
shouted in ccstacy; "God bless you,
Mark, you're the" finest fellow I ever
saw in my life. Jehosiphat! I'm proud
to have you for a son-in-law. Good
gracious! 1 didn't think I could be. sr.
pleased over anything."
"He's crazy again," said Katie, look
ing around at the other amazed facet
in the room.
"No, I'm so relieved. I've wished
you and Mark were married for a
month past, but I didn't see any way
to fix it up naturally, as I would
feci yc-u know," he "explained inco
herently, "and Mark can begin work
in my store to-morrow if he likes."
"Thank you," said Mark, with slight
sarcasm in his tone. "1 am sorry to
decline, but I already have a situation
in Bateman's drug-store."
"Well, never mind, you can have my
house to live ia. for I'm going why,
good gracious, Miranda, I'm so upset 1
almost forgot what we'd come for."
"Are you goicr to marry Mrs. Pea
body?" asked his daughter, who for two
or three minutes iad been eyeing that
Before he coiiki reply Mrs. Pcabodv
clasped Katie with both arms about the
neck, and, kissing her tenderly, whis
pered: "I am going to try to coirfcrt
his lonely heart for your sweet mother's
sake, Katie dear."
Mr. Kennedy, who had been shaking
hands with Mark over again, now
grasped the hand of the amused clergy
man and said, jubilantly: "Now, Mr
Berrydoodle, you see how it stands;
they u-(re afraid of mc, and I was afraid
of Katie, so we all ran away from each
other and "
"Nowyou can have a double wedding
and all be happy," suggested Mr. Doo
"Precisely just what I was about to
remark; they're happy, Miranda's
happy, and I'm the beat fixed man in
Posey County." Chicaro Tribune
A HINT TO BUILDERS,
Over-Ornamentation in llrickirark Con
demned !y aConnoissenr.
"The desire for the ornate Las given
rise of late to the moat elaborate and
fantastic attempts in bricks and in the
methods of putting them together,"
said a real estate agent yesterday. "In
many cases of newly built houses this
matter has frequently been the occasion
for the display of bad taste in the erec
tion of A cheap, fias'iy and wonderfully
designed wall While this, when new.
is not unsightly to the average eye, the
Wear and tear of the elements on tho
varidus projections, niche?, balconies
and the like render the cxtci lor appear
ance of such a bouse much moro un
sightly in a given Ciiue than that of 2
building of a more substantial and less
"The various projections and rece-ses
form a convenient place for dust and dirt
constantly blown about, and to add tc
this damage the ornamental brickwork
of the cornices offers a snug abode for
that numerous little pest, tho English
sparrow. When the white deposit, so
common to brick buildings, makes its
appearance the dinginess and general
air of past glory and damaged splcniafir
is increased. If builders would o-Ily
recognize the fact that the effort spent
in this direction would be better appre
ciated if directed toward the Interior
finish of a house the result would be ad
vantageous in many ways. lfiUadH
Base-Ball of To-Day.
Now the game is as Wholly a profes
sional matter except where it is played
by boys ou the common as.a perform
ance on the the trapeze or the spring
board in a circus. It may bo worth the
price of admission" to those who care
for it, but it has no title to fill up as
muclTspace in local news as a session
of the city council or an anniversary ol
a charitable association. It is "no mat
ter of local interest, except as any dis
play of professional dexterity may be.
Hardly a man in any club claiming the
name of a city belongs to the city bj
birth or residence. One year he be
longs to Detroit, another to Indianapo
lis, "another to Buffalo or Cleveland
The whole body of "professionals," and
that includes every player of any con
siderable skill, is exactly like the "eon
dotiere" of the "middle ages," who
hired themselves as soldiers to one
State or another as they were best paid,
and changed sides on aay adequate in
ducement, and fought as well for the
second party as they had previously
fonght-against it. A city can feel no
iral TtridA or interest in a club thus ap
propriated to it, and there is no sens
o lutal nlntv ot fillinc columns with lH
ioirmis feats.r-jrfligngJo.w Jaumik ,
', " JJi -'
HOME, FARM AND GARDEN.' '
The fashionable sandwich is mads
f thin bread and chopped chicken cov
ered all over with thick paste. N. Y.
Beech wood should always be sea
soned under cover. If left out exposed
to all sorts at weather it soon becomes
almost worthless as fuel. Exchange.
An English gardener states that
fruit does not color so well in a sunny
season as in one when there is but litt'e
sunshine. There "was more sunshine in
England last year than during any sea
son for half a century, but jiil the ap
ples, pears and peaches were Yery poor
To make apple snowball. Boil one
half pound of rice in milk till nearly
cooked; then strain; peel and core
some large apples without dividing
them. Put a clove and some sugar
into the centre of each apple, and tho
rice round them. Tie each up in a
cloth separately; boil for thrcc- uarters
of an hour; remove the. cloth and place
on a warm dish. Ar. II Herald.
A nurseryman asserts that apple
trees which have straight and upright
tops have roots of a similar character,
and that those which have low and
spreading tops have bushy roots. Even
the color and peculiar markings of tho
bark of some varieties extend" to the
roots. The nurseryman is therefore
able to distinguish several varieties by
their roots alone. Chicago Times.
Cracks in floors around the mold
board or other parts of a room may bo
neatly and permanently filled by thor
oughly soaking newspapers in paste
made of one pound of flour, three
quarts of water, and a tablespoouful of
alum, thoroughly'boiled or mixed. The
mixture will be about as thick as putty,
and may be forced into the cracks with
a knife. It Mill harden like papier
machc. Boston Globe.
Everybody should learn how to
propagate fruits. When you buy a rare
plant lor your garden you may increase
it to a hundred in a short time by giv
ing it a little atteution, and if you do
not desire the increase yourself you can
do your friends a favor by placing such
gems in their garden. The professional
fruit-grower especially needs all possi
ble information on this subject. Troy
Many farmers maka a mistake in
fitting their land before they know
where seed for sowing or -planting it
can be had. They place themselves at
great disadvantage by this m:smr.agc
ment. for nearly always at seeding
time there is a scarcity, which Kdvancea
prices. Seedsmen do not change their
catalogue rates, but if orders are de
layed till spring they may find all stock
sold out so that wants of customers
can not be supplied. Prairie Farmer.
Geese should be supplied with food
adapted to their natural want; as far a
it is possible to furnish it. These bird
arc more herbivorous than any of our
domestic fowls. As a matter of course,
a diet coming nearest their summer
gras forage suits them best. Fire
hay, soaked in warm water and sprink
led with meal or bran, is vcceptable.
Boiled potatoes, mixed with meal,
serve well. Beets, turnips, potatoes or
apples, chopped fine, are good. Cal
bage is a favorite food and ought to to
generously supplied. Corn is relished
by them, but too much makes them
over fat. X. 'E. Farmer.
X .Simple Operation of Considerable Prac
Dishorning cattle is attended with
great suffering, if performed after the
horn has attained a size that makes it
impossible to cut it off close to the head,
without disturbing the cellular, bony
core, or base supporting the horn.
Such an operation is also attended by
some danger of the death of the animal.
The writer ha3 seen in "the Chicago
Union Stock-Yards, in one pen, two or
tiirec ear-loads of bulls, all of which
wenj suffering severely, and some dying
in agony indescribable, because their
horns had been sawn off within about
four inches of their skulls. Flies had
deposited their eggs in the exposed,
marrow-like substance contained in the
cells, of the bony cores, and the grubs
or larvje had worked their way towards
the brain, their every motion causing
Inconceivable degrees of torture to the
helpless beasts. It is -to be regretted
that the day of the auto dafe has passed,
and that therefore, mild just'ee can not
be legally meted to the savage who
would inflict such dreadful anguish
upon even the most vicious of brutes,
for a little gain.
As it is impossible that any reader of
the Frairic Farmer can wish to do so
cruel a deed as to cut the horns off a
mature animal, there is no need of de
scribing the method of doing it. But
there is a way by which the horns may
be prevented from growing, and
die operation is attended with little
?iain, ind that little is momentary.
Vhen a calf of a horned breed is a few
days old, little lumps will be found on
the head, indicating the spots where
the horns will grow, if not prevented
by the prompt removal of the little but
tons of incipient horn, lying loose be
neath the skin. To remove them, two
small slits, crossing at right angles,
aie made with a sharp Knife. The
buttons can then be easily lifted out,
the slight wound closed with a bit of
sticking plaster, and the work is done.
Some prefer to sear the spot where tbe
horns are to be, using a very hot iron,
that the operation may be more quick
ly and effectually done. One or two
shakes of the head express the calf s
disapproval of the fashions of the
world which arc yet quite new to the
youngster, and that seems to be the
iast of suffering on account of the
horns of Jhat animal. As there is no
way in use for determining the" exact
extent of the suffering of any animal
from an injury, one must decide for
liimself whether or not the pain attend
ing this operation on young calves is
equal to the suffering their horns
would inflict upon other animals, if
those dangerous and useless weapons
were permitted to grow. As to the
economy of the operation, there will be
ho doubt in the minds of those who
Jiave lost valuable animals, or much
feed, patience or profit, through "the
uxlsteaeeof horm on miacbleveoi of
vkiotn brutei.--i,rari Formr,
PERSONAL AND LITERARY. -. I
Rufns J. Childress, a poet and
mo(i7inn i?Htr. and a well-knowa
resident of Louisville, Ky., has becomo
The London newspapers have a
curious etiquette forbidding one to
either quote or comment upon anything
that appears in the columns of another.
Ida Lewis, "the Graco Darling oi
Lime Rock," near Newport, R. I., has
sent a contribution to the treasurer of
tho Graco Darling monument fund in
Rufus Choate, when somebody
threatened to challenge his vote on tho
ground that ho could not -write, an
swered: "If you do I will give you a
specimen of my handwriting, and chal
lenge vou on the ground that you cau
not"" read." X. T. Commcrcial-Adccr-User.
Mr. Sarony, the New York pho
tographer, although over sixty years of
age, rich and very fond of sketching in
eharcoal and chalks for the Tile and
Salmagundi Clubs, of which he is a
member, still attends personally to
posing the sitters in his great establish
ment. N. 1'. Fost.
"Bill" Nye invites the Prince of
Wales' son, who has just come of age,
to be his guest when he visits this coun
try. "I tender you. V-he writes, "tho
freedom of my double-barreled shotgun
during the prairie-chicken holocaust. I
know where the angleworm grows
rankest and the wild hen hatches her
The new book, "The Money
makers." which is said to be a reply to
"The Bread-winners," has just been
published, and it has been generally
understood that Congressman Martin
A. Foran, of Cleveland, is the author;
but that gentleman denies the report,
and thcic promises to be the same
mystery about the book as there was
about "The Bread-winners." Chicajo
The late David Kimball, of Ports
mouth, N. II., had on several occasions
during his lifetime the rare experience
of seeing under the roof-tree of the o'.d
house at Topsfield, Mass., seven gene
rations of his own blood, namely, his
own great-grandfi.ther, grandfather,
father, mother, his own generation, his
own and his brother's children and
grandeh'ldren, and his brother's great
grandchildren. Boston Journal.
Policeman Richaiti L. Eldredgc, of
New York, has bee 1 retired from the"
foico and will hereafter receive a pen
sion of fifty dollars per month. El
dredgc has been in continuous service
for fifty-two years, and is now eighty
seven yeais old. He Was one of tho
four men who stood guard at CasL
Garden when General Lafayette was re
ceived bv the citizens of New York, und
was the "officer called by the mob after
the murder of Helen Jcwctt many yuars
ago. It was he w'10 found the haU-het
wiM which the murder was committed
and the cloak of the murderer. X. 1'.
The principal seasons illustrated .it
tne roller-skating rink are "fall" aid
"spring." Some of the remarks they
provoke arc summery. Xorritiown
"Joseph Marmaduke Mullallv, how
dare you, sir!' exclaimed the indig
nant mother of a St. Louis boy. "Take
your sister's car muff off your feet in-,
stantcr and find your rubbers. Don't be
so lazy,s:r!" Fittsburrjh Chronicle-Tele-graph.
"Look here, this piece of meat
don't suit me. It's from the back ol
the animal's neck," said a man to a
German butcher. "Mine fricn', all do;
Ecef vat I sells is pack of dot neck. ,
icrc vos nodding but horns in front ol
dot neck." X. 1. Independent.
"Do you manufacture trucks as
well as roller skates?' "Oh, no."
"But I was down at your factory this
morning and sawscveral puttogether."
"Oh, those were not trucks." "No!"
"No, they are the kind of skates we arc
shipping to Chicago." Boston Tost.
So you didn't succeed very well
with your school in Illinois?" "No;
I had "to give it up at the end of the
first month." "Did you use the black
board much?" "No; it was too large.
But I used all the other furniture about
the room that wasn't nailed down."
X. Y. Graphic.
"Aunt Jane, is it quite true that a
ladv may ask a gentleman to marry her
if it is "leap year?" "Yes, my dear,
it is quite true. "But if he don't want
to marry her, Aunt Jane, what must ho
do then?" "He must give her a new
black silk dress, my dcav, and then sho
understands." "Oh! Aunt Jane! Aunt
Jane! Now I know why you have 0
many black silk dresses." Chicago
"Mary, what does this mean? I1
find a bill for the use of hose." "Sure,
marm. a man called to know if you
used hose. I told him you did and ho
left.that bill." " Why did you tell him
we used hose, Mary? We never do."
Mary's face showed surprise, distrust
and reproach: "Why. ve do, marm!"
with vehemence." "Hose? Mary, we
haven't any." "Why, m-a-rm! What
does Pat take up the weeds with?"
"Just listen to this, Martha!" ex
claimed Mr. Jarphly, who was reading
his evening paper; "one of" the dogs at
the London prize show is valued at
$50,000. Good gracious! That's more
money than I ever expect to be worth
in my life!" "Some dogs are worth
more than others, Jeremiah," quietly
remarked Mrs. Jarphly. And Mr.
Jarphly eyed her for a moment and
said she need not sit np for him that
evening. X. Y Herald.
Barnacle was forty-two years of age
yesterday. His wife presented him with
a handsome pair of carpet slippers cost
fifty cents. Barnacle was grateful, but
thoughtful. At last he exclaimed:
"T imes hav changed!' ' 'Why, dear?' '
asked Mrs. B. "Well, before we were
married, you gave me Blippers worked
in. floss and silk, embroidered, mono
grammed, scalloped in morocco and
patent-leather with wool soles, at a
cost of several dollars ah, times '
change!" -'Well, .John, replied Mrs.
B., alter thoughtful pause, "I had the
ilippcrs charged to jvu. I thought you
wouMtt't wanttoptj fir Mfypur." .
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