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The Morristown gazette. (Morristown, Tenn.) 1867-1920, July 02, 1873, Image 1

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The Morristown Gazette.
PUBLISHED BY
L. P. & G. E. SPECK
TERMS ."
$2 A YEAH, STKICTLY IN ADVANCE.
Miscellaneous Advertisements
J. O. M A T H E W S O N ,
PRODXTCB
COMMISSION MERCHANT,
AUGUSTA, GA.
may 18 ly.
v
K
Line
miSQH, BURNS & CO.,
Wholesale Grocers and Commission Merchants,
30 South Howard Street, corner of Lombard,
BALTIMORE.
WE Keep constantly on hand a large and well as
sorted stock of Groceries, suitable for the
Rrtnthern and Wetiteru trade. We solicit conmgu
rnents of Country Produce, such as Cotton, Feath
erw, Ginseng, Beeswax, Wool, Dried Fruit, Fur
Hkius, etc. Our facilities for doing business are
such m to warrant quick Hales and prompt returns.
All orders will have our xrompt attention. uia27.
J. COOTEK.
W. VAN HUSK.
J. VAX HCSS.
COOTER & CO.
DEALERS IN
General Merchandise,
Clmciy Bend. Hamblen County. Tenn.
o
PRODUCE TAKEN IN EXCHANGE FOR GOODS.
SALT ALWAYS KEPT ON HAND. jy8-ly
F. L. DA VIES & BRO.,
IMPORTERS AND DEALERS IN
Watches, Jewelry, Diamonfls
AND
Sterling
Si Iver-wa r e ,
CORNER CHURCH AND SUMMER ST.
NASHVILLE, TENN.
novUO-ly.
'Mrs. A. P. Flynn,
At tiie Tnrley Honss,
MORRISTOWN, TENN.
XT EEPS Constantly on hand the Latest and moid
Fashiunable Styles of
Millinery and Straw Goods,
B0N.KT, TBIMXIlfG AM) VELVET RIBBONS,
Hunnet Silks, Satins and Velvets,
Blond-J, Notts, Crapes, Ruches, Flowers,
Feathers, Ornaments,
Straw Bonnets Ladies'' Hats
TRIMMED AND iNT.UMMED
Ml.-. A. J. DONALDSON.
K. I. IIAYNIE.
DONALDSON & HAYNIE,
Dressmakers & Milliners,
MAIN STREET,
(Fir.-"t door west of the Steam Mill,)
MORRIS l"OW N, TENN.
11 OITLP Respectfully announce to the Indira of
f Mnrrist own and vii'iuity that they haw OpMM d
lu establishment fur the purpose of carrying on the
Millinery and. Dressmaking Business
In all its branches, and solicit a share of thf ir pat
ronage, pledging our best efforts to render entire
satinfaction. oct9.
E. F. ESPEBANDIEU.
F. I1 I'.H XDIEU.
ESPERANDIEU & CO.,
Cipr Manufacturers,
KNOXVILLE, TENN.
Prompt attention paid to Orders, and satisfaction
guaranteed as to iputlity of goods and prices.
Our Cigars can be purchased, at manufacturer's
prices, from Dr. O. T. Mage, Morristown.
J, H. COULTEK.
J. W. BBOWDEB
COULTER & BROWUEB,
MAIN STREET, - -
MORIil'.XOWN, TENN.
IKALKIIS IN
Drugs, Medicines,
Paints.
MUUS!
Patent medicines, Fancy Goods
AND, IN FACT,
Everything usually kept in a
Retail Drug Store.
Physicians
septl.
Prescriptions Carefiilly Compounded.
HENRY WALKER.
THE OLD, RELIABLE AND "PERMANENT"
Barber,
flONTTNUES to "hold forth" at his old stand on
Cumberland Street, near the Railroad, where he
will be pleased to see and wait upon all of his old
customers, and aa many new ones as may feed iu
clined to patronize him.
Lewis & Jackson,
81TCCESSORR TO EVANS LEWIS,
DEALERS IN
Boots, hoe9
HATS, CAPS,
Furs, Trunks, Traveling Bags,
UMBRELLAS,
FURNISHING GOODS, &c.
No 53 Gay Slrcet,
Puff Lewis. )
A, O. Jackson. (
Knoxville, Tenn.
Ben. P. Mitchell,
CARPENTER & BUILDER,
Morristown, Tenn.
TROPOSES to the citijsens of this community to
contract for the work of every description of
Buildings, upon the most favorable terms. Parties
who contemplate the erectiou of houses would do
well to call on him. He is prepared to furnish all
the necessary material for buildings, upon such
terms that cannot fail to be to the advantage of the
jwrson building. Those who doubt tliis, can be sat
ifted of 1U truth by consulting the undersigned.
octH-ly. B. F. MITCHELL.
A. J. G O O L E Y ,
Carpenter and Baiifler,
MORRISTOWN, TENN.
(WINO to Mr. Cook's bad health, and his wish
to attend the Springs this summer, Cooley &
Cook have dissolved partnership by mutual consent.
1 wish to say through your paper that the "old man"
Goosey la here, has a good run of work, and a con
siderable amount on hands, and still solicits the
rUronage of Lis friends and the public generally
wish to hire THREE or FOUR
Journeymen Carpenters,
Good workmen no other kind need apply but the
aocve can get ui om wages: paia in Morristown.
A. J. COOLEY.
MU9.
DOUT SENP A WAT FROM HOME TO HAVE
Toot Job Printing done. The OazErrs Office
iM i retired to do any and all kinds at low figures.
THE
Vol. VII No. 18.
New Advertisements.
COWAN, McCLUNG & CO.,
KNOXVILLE, TENN.,
Are now offering to the trade the largest and most
desirable stock of
AND
NOTIONS
Ever brought to the Southern country.
Cowan, McClung & Co.
HAVE RECEIVED
the Manufacturers
stock of
Direct from
an immense
Boots & Seobb
MADE TO ORDER,
Of the best material, and as their very large pur
chases secure to them extremely low fig
ures, they are enabled to guarantee
their prices against any mar
ket in the United States.
IOWAN, M'CLUNB & CO,
Have the Handsomest line of
rmr me
Including Ladies' Trimmed Gxds,
They ever purchased, and at lower prices.
COWAN, M'CLUNG & CO.
HAVE IN STORE A FRESH STOCK OF
ClothinG,
Adapted to the season.
QUWAX, McCLUNG & CO.
Are in receipt of full lines of
Hardware and Cutlery.
JGWAH, U 'CLUNG &J0.
Also have a special department of
QTJEENSWARE,
AND
COWAN, M'CLUNG I CO.
ONLY SELL TO
MERCHANTS.
Ths Type Upon Which
Thxb Papee
IS PRINTED
WAS CAST AT THE
RICHMOND TYPE FOUNDRY,
1200 & 1208 Franklin Street.
H. L. Pelouze &Co.
MOULDERS PATTERN LETTERS
Always on Hand.
H.
C. Jackson,
Fres't.
F. H. Mc(?Lt so,
Vice-Pres't.
W. LlLLABIJ,
Cashier.
East Tennessee National Bank
OF KNOXVILLE,
(The only National Bank Betweei Salem, Va.,
and Cleveland, Tenn..)
Designated Pepsi'tory of the United States
AND SUCCESSORS TO
First National JM of Knoxyille.
St o;lcliolloi'!ss :
Jos. R. Anilcro!i, Bristol , H. U. Matlock, Riceville.
Rob't Love, Johnson City. N. Bogart, Philadelphia.
J. H. Earnesi, Rhcatown. J. A. Rayl, Knoxville.
F. W. Taylor, sr., Russell- Joeeph Jaques, "
ville. i F. H. McClung, "
R. M. Barton, Morristown. Sam McKinuey, "
Wm. Brazvlton, New Mar-: S. B. Boyd, "
kit. i W. W. Woodruff, -
Wm. Harris, Dsndridge. J. W. Lillard, "
Oeo. A. Fain, Julia Jackson, "
J. E. Raht, Cleveland. R. C. Jaokson, "
DECEIVES Deposits, Buys and Sells Exchange,
AV Ponlca and Domestic, deals in Gold, Silver,
Pncurr. nt Bank Notes, United Statea, State, County
aud Corporation Bonds and Coupons, and wiil
do a General Collecting and Banking Business
throughout the United States. feb!9-ly.
(
M
WILMETH
I II I L III L I II I
MAIN STREET, MORRISTOWN, TENN.
Has opened a complete stock of
F a m i I u Groceries.
m i I y
Which he offers cheap for Cash.
He will pay the highest market price fer all kinds of
country produce.
Also, keeps a good stock of Staple Ooods, such aa
Heavy DoiuesUcs, Shoes, Prints, Fancy Goods.
This la the place where you can always find some.
;..... good to eat. jel9-ly-
h. hudbiTs;
Fashionable Barber,
NEAR THE DEPOT,
Mo rristown, Te n n .
TtfY Shop is fitted up in good style, and I offer
accommodations equal to the best. I return
thanks to my friends and the public for their pat
ronage in the past, and respectfully solicit a con
tinuance of the same. feb6-tf.
Wanted.
A GOOD COOPER TO MAKE ONE THOUSAND
Barrels, for which we wiU pay cash- but prefer
selling 00 acres of land, well timbered, IV miles
from Holaton river ; all tillable, and for woich we
will take the making of 1000 barrels in payment,
and we furnish the hoop iron. Address
C O TATF
mvM Bean's Sttioa7Tenn.
HNS
MORRISTOWN
Miscellaneous Advertisements
For over FORTY YEARS this
PURELY VEGETABLE.
LIVER MEDICINE has proved to be the
GREAT UNFAILING SPECIFIC
for Liver Complaint and its painful offspring
DYSPEPSIA, CONSTIPATION, Jaundice, BOknM
attacks, SICK HEADACHE, Colic, Depression of
Spirits SOUR STOMACH, Heart Burn, CHILLS
AND FEVER, &c, &c
After years of careful experiments, to meet a
great and urgent demand, we now produce from
our original Genuine Powders
THE PREPARED.
a Liquid form of SIMMONS' LIVER REGULATOR,
containing all its wonderful and valuable proper
ties, and offer it in
ONE DOLLAR BOTTLES
The Powders, (price as before,) . $1.00 per package.
Sent by mail 1.04
CAUTION, -a
Buv no Powders or PREPARED SIMMONS'
LIVER REGULATOR unless in our engraved
wrapper, with Trade mark, Stamp and Signature
unbroken. None other is genuine.
J. II ZE1L1N & CO.,
MACON, GA., and PHILADELPHIA.
SOLD BY ALL DRUGGISTS.
Professional Cards.
DENTISTRY.
DENTISTRY.
THOS. J, SPECK, D. D. S.
OFF ICES:
Kogersville, Tenn. .from 1st to 15th of each month.
Morristown, from 15th to last of each month.
I M Cash or Its equivalent
MAGEE,
and Physician,
Sugeon
.MORRISTOWN,
Will give special attenti
TREATMENT OK DISEASES
T e n N .
l to tho
HV WOMEN.
WILL. S. niCKSON.
KlmR HAItTO-'
DICKSON & BARTON,
Attorneys ii i aw,
MOKRIS1'; '. N, TKNN.
.TILL Practice in all the Courts of upper I.ast
Ten
aee&ee. Prompt and I'-' 'ai a'.tt :Hnu given
to collections,
Kekeuencks by Peumissios Rob't Mc Far land,
If. M. Barton, sr., 1). Morris, AVm. FtOton, K. J.
Kidwell, Earnest & Briscoe, Fence k Lyle. Dr. G.
T. Wai.HO, Morristown, Tenn. ; J. A. l'-uji, Knox
ville, Teun. ; Win. II. Moffett, New Markrt, Teuu. ;
H. Baker, Oreeueville, Tenn. ; Davis .c McJ arlaud,
Bristol, Tenn. fel.l'J-ly.
T - rr. CJ -A- ILL HON
DENTIST.
T.T A VINO Permanently located in Morristown, res
pectfully offers his services to the pubJic.
Satisfaction guaranteed. Terms liberal.
SSr Office over Folsom & Taylor's Store, decll
JAMES P. EVANS
Attorney at Law.
MORRISTOWN
T E N N
Will practice in all the courts of Last Tennessee,
where the FEE will justify. Prompt attention will
be given to collections.
A. H . PETTIBONE,
Attorney at Law,
t i II E E X E V I L L E , T E N N .
Will practice in the courts of the First Judicial
Circuit and the Supreme Court at Knoxville. Will
also give prompt attention to the collection of all
kinds of claims and debts.
"a i .
Hotel Cards.
TUKLEY HOUBJG
(OPPOSITE THE DEPOT,)
llorristoivn, Tenn,
T. C. Gain, Proprietor.
rpUE TURLEY HOUSE IS " FIRST-CLASS "
In all departments, witli large, comfortable and
well-furnished rooms, while the Table is supplied
with the best fare of the country.
e A well-etocked LIVERY STABLE is kept in
connection with the Turley House. jau8.
ST O JE3 uft. T THE
Yirg'inia House.
Mil in Street, Morriatown, Tenn..
If. DICKINSON, PROPRIETOR.
J.
o
1" OCATKP In the Business Centre of town, and
1 1
but a few steps in rear ot the Deoot. Con.
nectedwith the Virginia Ho; sk is a good Liv
ery and Sale Stable, and parties can be fur
nished with horses, buggies, hacks, etc., at
reasonable prices.
O
Low ( It arses, Good Fare aid (artful Attention
DAILY LINE TO TATl'8 SPNXG.
Baggage carried from and to the Depot free
of charge.
Frankli n H ou e ,
OPPOSITE COURT HOUSE,
Main Street, Knoxville, I 6 mi .
Wm. 8MITn, PROPRIETOR.
Battle House,
(FORMERLY STACEY HOUSE.)
Church Street, Nashville, Tenn.
M. B. WINBOURN, PROPRIETOR.
J. T. BLAND AND W. 8. WINBOURN, CLERKS.
rpHE Battle House is most conveniently located
to all the Depots, the Capitol, and to the business
portion of the city.
WASHINGTON HOUSE,
Corner of 8th and Church Streets,
LTNOHBUKQ,
I W. BCOVIIAE a CO., PROPRIETORS.
Omnibus to an from Dcyet. Krce
fksH!Bn m. w Jbk.
MORRISTOWN, TENN., WEDNESDAY, JULY 2, 1873.
i
"Woman's Laugh.
BY" GEORGE ADAMS.
I've pondered over every sound
Whose echoes thrill the soul,
I've searched those melodies profound
Whose numbers round me roll ;
But sought in vain the magic spell
Which bids each care depart,
When ripples from fair woman's lips
The joy which fills her heart.
There's music in the summer breeze
And the glad water's flow,
I hear amid the forest leaves
An anthem, soft and low ;
But when from woman's ruby lips
Is borne vipon the air
Her overflow of happiness,
She reigns unrivalled there.
The ocean'B wild, majestic tone
Resounds from clime to clime,
The noble organ fills the soul
With harmony sublime ;
But these mii3t ever yield the palm
When woman's heart sets free,
From love-lit eyes and teeth of pearl,
A flood of ecctacj.
That laugh can gild with joy the clouds
Of sorrow, toil and pain ;
Can cause the deserts of the heart
To blossom o'er again ;
Can melt the fetters of the world
Its coldness and its pride ,
Can lift the veil from fortune's face,
And cast her frown aaide.
That ringing laugh the echoes wake
O'er earth, and sea, and air ;
It links the mingled eongs of time
With angel voices fair.
Call this no more a "vale of tearx,"
While gushes, full and free,
From woman's lips, and eyes, and soul.
That heaven-born melody.
Bad Debts.
The Teronto Monetary Times,
commenting on a recent failure, re
marks as follows :
Fifty thousand dollars of bad
debts in six or seven j-ears, on a
wholesale business of moderate di
mensions ! That a pushing trade
conducted for so long a term should
end in such a slough of despond !
What an interesting collection, what
i a beautiful bundle all these p rotes t
ed notes, unpaid bills, returned
I drafts, insolvent schedules et hoc
iuiist ui.iivv; up I
How much money
was paid out to the travelers who
got the orders for the goods which
all this rubbish represented ; and
how often have the anticipated prof
its on all these transactions helped
to brighten the prospects of a for
tune to be made by conducting an
enterprising trade, selling where
other men couldn't sell. And now
the whole structure of fortune and
distinction erected on this founda
tion has disappeared like the base
less fabric of a vision and left little
else than these mildewed documents
behind. There are evidently two
ways of doing business the one to
make money, the other to make bad
debts ; the one to accumulate a bal
ance at the bank, and the other to
heap up a pile of rusty and dishon
ored obligations. The moral of a
recent case is not hard t draw.
Every trader may decide for him
self which of these models he is
pursuing. Like causes will always
produce like effects.
There are but few men in this
country who are more ready to give
advice than old Mr. Waterloo, of
the St. Louis Journal. Hear him :
"At this season it is proper to ad
vise clergymen that brevity is the
soul of wit and that the Sermon ou
the Mount, an excellent model for
them, could not have been more
than ten or fifteen minutes long'
As the Journal man was never
known to go to church "hisself," the
kindness of heart and pure benev
olence exhibited in the foregoing
paragraph, are calculated to bring
tears to the eyes of the most hard
ened reader.
According to the Kansas newspa
pers, one of the Congressmen from
that State drew last session, under
the head of "stationery," between
two and one-quarter tons of sugar
and twenty-four boxes of lemons.
Do the Kansas people regard a Rep
resentative with such an astonishing
lemon-and-sugar record as that as a
stationarv member?
An exchange says "a 3'oung girl
in Brooklyn supposed she was dying
of love, but the doctors pronounced
it dysi ensia." And, pray, what did
the Jociors know about it? If the I
youpg girl said it was love, then it
was love. We have had both love
and dyspepsia, and we know there
isn't one doctor in ten that can tell
the difference.
President Grant had a bad scare
last week ; one of his bullest pups
was sick at the stomach. The con
sultation disclosed the fact that the
meat had not been cut fine enough.
A thriftv sheriff in Indiana utilizes
IP
idle juries by setting them to work
mowing the grass and cleaning up
on the court house grounds.
Gov. Walker, of Virginia, will turn
j editoj when his term of office ex
pires, taking control of a leading
Virginia newspaper.
jjjiscellancott
HIT AND THE
FONTAINE.
GENTLE
A Mournful Ballad o.f je Arena Tragi
cal Sawdust.
The phrensied paragraphist of the
St. Louis Journal attempts this
storj' :
Young Billy De Hit on the cymbal
played, in Forepaugh's circus band,
and he had, as a C3Tmbalier, 'tis said,
not an equal in all the land. A man he
was in a woman's eyes, accomplished
in every way, and his cymbals drown
ed all other noise, when the band be
gan to play. The snare drum splut
tered and rattled again, the big
horns bellowed and roared in vain,
the cymbals alone were heard. And
Billy De Hit was the pride of the
crowd, who gathered the circus to
see ; they clapped their hands and
shouted aloud in praise of William
D. But Billy De Hit, as remarked
above, was merely a man at best,
and it's not at all strange, he was
madly in love with a lad' most
scantily dressed, in a curtailed robe
of the lightest gauze fit load for a
waist so trim with slight regard for
society's laws, disclosing a 1-1-limb.
La Belle Fontaine, the play-bills
said, was the name she travelled by,
and, of course, no other would do
instead, for play -bills never lie. She
loved De Hit, did this beauteous
thing, as he loved her, in sooth, and
they'd cast sheep' s-eyes in the circus
ring, and for once love's course ran
smooth. Together they'd stroll
where the cages were and tickle the
kangaroo, and admire the green poll-
parrots there and the gaudy cocka
too ; absorbed in loving thoughts
they'd deem the world for them
alone, and the "happy family" made
them dream of a family of their own.
But in roses frequently lurks
a bee, and hopes are often vain ; and
a blight there came over William D.,
who loved La Belle Fontaine ; for
a rival came, an ugly swell, with a
vicious look and frown, who was clad
in tights and a cap and bell a hor
rible painted clown ! He'd flop
about, and grin and wink at the beau
tiful Fontaine, and then, before she
had time to think-, he'd flop and
wink ayrain. This wretched clown
with malice saw the love in Wil
liam's heart, and he told the ''Man
with the Iron Jaw" that he'd soon
make William smart. And a most
malicious, deadly scheme this ugly
clown conceived, to end De Hit's
delicious dream and leave his love
bereaved. This villain fierce and
unrestrained the tale is one of gore
the cymbals of De Hit obtained and
daubed them o'er and o'er, just where
their broad flat surface plaj-ed, till no
brass could be seen, because a half
inch thick there laid of nitro-glyc-erine
!
The seats were all filled in the
weather-stained tent ; there was
crushipg without and within ; the
crowd was impatient, on merriment
bent ; the show was about to begin.
The riders, in colors and spangles
arrayed, were waiting the signal to
come ; the band leader stood, his ba
ton displayed, and the drummer was
tightening his drum. Stood De Hit,
like Apollo or Tom Allen there, a
cymbal sustained in each paw, with
a hold like the clasp of a grizzly
bear or the grip of a mother-in-law.
The curtains were parted, the riders
dashed by, in blazing, bedizened
array ; the band leader flourished his
baton on high, and the band pealed
aloud in its play ; the drum, clari
onet, viol, fiddle and fife, all aided in
swelling the din, and all was serene
as a millionaire's life, to the point
where the cymbals came in. Then
De Hit waved aloft the broad discs j
in the air, keeping time to the clam
or and clang ; for a second he waved
them aloft, and then square to-geth-er
they came with a bang ! A smoke
and a blaze and a thundering roar !
a mingling of horses and men, and
babies and women the circus was
o'er, and a wreck where the circus
had been ! There came order
at length to the terrified mass, and
the search was commenced for De
Hit ; they raked in the saw-dust, they
looked in the grass, but nothing
they found save a bit of fresh meat,
say a pound, or a pound and a half,
a coat-tail, a small lock of hair, a
music-book, torn from its binding of
calf, and a poker deck, lacking "a
pair !" They buried these relics, or
remnants, or dregs in a grave-yard
adjacent to town, and the false-heart
ed girl, with the spangles and legs,
she married the murderous clown.
Watermelons, with twenty pounds
of colic to the square inch, are re
tailing at Key West, Florida, at ten
cents each. The village undertakers
pay the melon dealers a dollar each
for all they sell.
A newly landed Englishman rode
sixty miles on a locomotive to watch
how the cow-catcher operated, but
it did not catch a cow after all.
A touchy Wisconsin man has stop
ped - his subscription to the local
newspaper of his town just because
the editor eloped with Inn wife.
BILLY D
GAZETTE.
Dary Crockett, the Second.
We have already published a sketch
of Mr. Crutchfield, Congressman
elect from Tennessee, who in many
of his striking original traits bears
great resemblance to the immortal
Davyt Crocket. The following is
from the pen of a special correspon
dent of the Washington Star, who
accompanied the excursion of the
late St. Louis Congressional Con
vention to Texas :
"At Grand Junction we left the
rough diamond of the Congressional
party the Hon. Wm. Crutchfield,
the elected member from the Chat
tanooga District. Since the days of ;
Davy Crockett, Tennessee has always
managed to have at least one moun
taineer character in Congress ; and
Crutchfield, the latest, is said to re
semble Crockett more in originality
and style than any of the intervening
line. He is a sunburnt, wiry little
man, with foxy hair and whiskers,
and though, by report, of considera
ble means, wears the cheapest of
homespun suits, a good deal frayed
at the edges, and with a pair of
heavy, well-greased cowhide brogans
that were the perpetual despair of
the Pullman boot-blacks. He is not
only a mighty hunter, like Crockett,
but is moreover a shrewd business
man. He built the "Crutchfield
House," at Chattanooga, which was
sold during the war for $65,000 in
Confederate money, and the pro
ceeds prudentpy turned at once into
real estate in the shape of valuable
farming lands. In the same prudent
way, Crutchfield invested Confeder
ate money as fast as it come into his
hands into tobacco, which, on the
advance of the Union troops, he
sold at $1.50 per pound in green
backs. Knowing the country and
the people thoroughly, he was of
great service to Gen. Sherman as a
scout. When he was put up for
Congress nobody supposed he stood
any chance of being elected, as the
District went Democratic at the pre
vious election by some 5,000 majori
ty, but his neighbors took hold of
him and elected him by about 1,500
majority.
CRUTCHFIELD S SPEECH.
Crutchfield, by his quaint remarks
and racy narratives of mountaineer
ing experiences, had made himself
vastly popular with the whole party,
and when he took the train at Grand
Junction, it was conceded that we
could have "better spared a better
man." So there was a general de
mand that he should make a parting
speech while the train waited, and
he mounted a platform barrow and
proceeded as follows :
" 'Gen-tle-men We air about to
part after having travelled about a
good deal hyar and thar, but I hope
to meet you next winter over thar at
Washington. My friend Hyne, of
Arkansas, give me some good ad
vice how to keep from bein' sea-sick
when we war down thar on the Gulf.
It war to lay your head back and
look up. I think, my friends, that
in these mo-"n-ler times that will be
a good thing to do when I get to
Washington city. Tremendous ap
plause. Gen-tle-men We have
been through a great country. Na
poleon Bonnr-part truly said, when
he threw down the pen after deeding
Louisiana to the Americans, 'Thar'e
the heaviest blow Great Britain ever
got.' Applause. Gen-tle-men I
wish you could have gone up home
with me. I am the little dog in the
big rye up thar. I have got the
smartest old woman, and the finest
brats j'ou ever sot eyes on. We've
got the tallest mountains and the
best whisky you ever sampled. Ap-
plause. Thar is Lookout Mountain,
from which you can see four States
Tennessee, Alabama, Georgia and
the drunken state. Gen-tle-men If
ever you' here the engine gave a
snort and the train moved off, amidst
loud cheers for Crutchfield."
The funny man of the Fayetteville
Express describes the manner in which
be now employs his leisure time.
He says : "The fat woman at the
circus created sad havoc among the
hearts of some of our young men
last Saturday, by declaring that she
was anxious to marry and settle
down. Anticipating the delightful
probability of her choice falling upon 1
one of their number, every mother's
son of them has been practicing
matrimonial tactics most likely to
suit a woman of her sylph-like pro
portions, by hugging the turn table
at the depot."
It is stated that "the debt of New
York city has increased $12,000,000
since the 'reform' party came into
power." That looks like driving
one set of cormorants out to make
room for another.
A New York Post Office clerk who
can't wear a diamond pin is looked
upon as having very much neglected
his business.
A New Bedford man found a long
lost brother recently, by reading
over the cases of cures in a patent
medicine almanac.
Two Dollars a Year.
Grumblers.
We wonder if this world ever was
or ever will be without more or less
grumblers? We reckon not. It is
no odds how bountiful the crops or
how plenty money may be, there is
always a full quota of grumblers to
croak "hard times," and it does ap
pear that this section is particularly
cursed with its full share of these
miserable creatures "miserable"
yes that is the word because a man
that is always grumbling like a sore
headed bear cannot be otherwise
than miserable. We have one of
the most healthful and productive
countries to be found in the world
a fine climate, where life can be en
joyed as it is in but few other places,
and still we have those among us
who are dissatisfied with their lot.
We have an abundance of corn,
wheat, meat and everything else for
home consumption, and some to
spare to foreign markets we have
enough money to carry on the pres
ent business of the country, and it
can be borrowed at 10 per cent., but
still we have men that complain of
"hard times." The fact is this gen-
oration knows
nothing about the
"hard times" that their fathers of
thirty and forty years ago experi
enced, and never will. If their cur
rency was depreciated and almost
worthless, their corn and wheat ly
ing in their granaries rotting for the
want of buyers at 25 and 50 cents
per bushel, and labor was worthless,
then there might be some cause for
this grumbling. But this is not the
case. On the contrary wc take a
more hopeful view of the situation,
and think the times are a great deal
better than the people. We are too
prone to complain without a cause.
If we were more thankful for the
abundance we have, we would all do
better. Always look upon the bright
side of the picture as well as the
dark side. We think we have the
greatest country in the world, and
the times here, everything consider
ed, are better than anywhere else.
If every man had his pockets full of
money, he would quit work entire
and go to loafing, and we would
have no laborers among us. To de
velop the real resources of a coun
try, money ought not to be plenti
ful. When it is scarce it is more
valuable, and the community will go
to work and do something to get its
share. Is not this so? If some of
our people would do more work, or
business of some kind, they would
find less time to croak about the
"hard times." Why, if money grew
upon the trees and bushes these men
would be too lazy to gather it they
would then grumble because some
body did not pluck it off and bring it
to them. If there is a class of men
in this world that we have the most
utter contempt for, it is that class
that are always croaking about
"hard times." There is an abun
dance of everything here that
can be obtained if the necessary in
dustry is used, and if every man
does not get his share it is
through
his own neglect. More work and
less croaking will make "good
times." Try it and see if our head
is not level upon this matter.
Iowa lovers have a queer way of
doing things. At Webster City,
the other day, as the telegraph in
forms us, E. P. Speakman, being
"driven to desperation by a burning
passion for the idol of his heart, pur
chased a seventy-five cent pistol,
loaded it with buckshot," and, after
seeking her presence, shot her all
over the face and head, because she
would not become his wife. He also
singed his whiskers badly, and ruin
ed his profile by letting loose a
charge of shot in his own face. It
is cheerful to reflect that only seventy-five
cents is necessary to insure
relief for a man's lacerated feelings
under such circumstances. The old
resource of verse making is fast get
ting out of date. If Speakman' s
example is to become contagions.
Iowa matrimonial affairs will not be
long in looming up. Few wide
awake girls will be inclined to hesi
tate between matrimony and the
grave.
The Athens Post says : We beard
of several lots of old wheat in the
county for which the holders refused
two dollars per bushel, hoping for
a higher figure. That sort of busi
ness never made anybodj' rich. The
safest plan is always to sell when
the market reaches a paying figure.
We know some farmers who follow
that practice, and they rarely, if
ever, are hard pressed for money.
The New Orleans Herald says
that any blind man can read the
deplorable condition of Louisiana
upon the books of the State Aud
itor, since the public debt is there
recorded in "raised figures."
Governor Austin, of Minnesota,
declines to be re-elected on the
ground that he really can't afford it.
A woman at Milwaukie recently
gave birth to three boys and one
girt
ADVERTISING RATES.
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A liberal discount from the above rate trill be
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All bills due upon first insertion of advertise
ment, unless otherwise contracted for.
All announcements of candidates must be paid
for in advance.
Job Work must be paid for on delivery.
Time to "Put on toe Brakes.
The Elmira Advertiser has the
following able editorial, to which we
call attention :
It is time for many men in every
community, and many women also,
to halt, or at least to "put on the
brakes," and come down to a more
temperate, calm and rational life.
Suicides, murders, robberies, defalca
tions, lunacies, wreckr and ruins,
are the fruits of our over-stirnuTateri
and intemperate modern habits, ami
the fashionable modes of living, and
just in that proportion as the indi
viduals of a community or a nation
go to ruin, just in that proportion
the communities or nations of which
they are integral parts, srre also
ruined. No patriot can look ou
the several vices and evils which
prevail all through this goodly heri
tage of freedom left its by our
ancestors, without trembling for the
future of his country. These evils
must be checked, and those vices
reformed, or the nation, like all
the proud nations of the past, will
go down to its grave. Temperance,
virtue economy, enterprise, science,
art, industry. Integrity and religion
build up nationalities, while intem
perance, in all its varied forms, and
with its hideous hydra heads, de
vours and destroys them.
It is to be religiously hoped that
we are to see no darker days in
American social life, than those we
are now passing through. It would
seem that the climax of human
wickedness and folly has been
reached, and that any change, from
and after the present time, cannot
but be for the better. There is cer
tainly a more thoughtful mood visi
ble in the public mind, a more gen
eral determination that wholesome
laws shall be enforced, and that crime
shall be more certainly and ade
quately punished. This is an en
couraging sign, and gives promise
of better days. Let all who love
their country and have faith in its
noble destiny, make their voices
heard and their influence felt in
every good word and work calcu
lated to carry the nation safely
through the perilous era of intemper
ance, and its direct consequences,
pauperism, misery, degradation and
crime, to the better days that lie in
the future, though not as yet in full
view of our mortal eves.
The Proposed Mew State of Jackson.
Several of our contemporaries of
the press have suggested a meeting
in this city on the 20th of July, for
the purpose of taking the necessary
steps to form a new State out of all
the territory of West Tennessee,
West Kentucky, and a portion of
North Mississippi. We say, let the
meeting be held, and in behalf of
the hospitable citizens of Jackson
we hereby tender a cordial welcome
to all the friends of the enterprise
who may attend. Ample arrange
ments will be made to accommodate
all who may come. It is not neces
sarj' to have meetings in all the coun
ties to appoint delegates, for the in
vitation is broad enough to take in
all the friends of this great move
ment who may be present on the oc
casion. But we especially invite ed
itors and representative men, irre
spective of political parties, to be
with us on the 20th of July. If we
had a united press on this subject,
all working to a given point, and
take a strong pull, a long pull, and a
pull altogether, the new State can
be formed. In the meantime we
suggest to the citizens of Jackson
that they have an early meeting and
appoint the necessary committees to
push forward the work. Jackson
Whig and Tribune.
A Beautiful Incident.
A laborer, painfully anxious about
the fate of his family should death
take him away, one day found in a
bush two birds' nests near each oth
er. Constantly he watched them,
till one day a hawk pounced upon
and destroyed the parent birds tie
longing to one of them. Sadly dis
tressed, thinking the fate of the
little birds betokened the fate of his
own little children when he was no
more, he kept away from the place
for some time, but at last was drawn
to look at the nest, expecting to find
the fledgeling starved to death ; but
to his surprise, they were alive and
healthy. Standing by in astonish
ment he saw the parents of the other
brood equally distribute the food
they brought between their own
young ones and the orphan birds,
and took comfort (for in that country
there is no work house,) believing
that the great Father would in such
extremity provide in a similar way
for his own children.
The North Carolina judges make
only one bite of it. In charging a
jury at Raleigh, recently, Judge
Tourgee told them that if they were
satisfied that the criminal should be
punished with death, he would take
great pleasure in pronouncing sentence.

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