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THE LOGAN REPUBLICAN I
TWICE- AWE E K H
VO LOGAN, CACHE COUNTY, UTAH TUESDAY. MARCH 10, 1903 NO 37' H
"IT CAN BE DID."
Idaho Enterprise Tells How to
Live on $30 a Month.
Some time ago a member of the
Utah legislature brought up the per
plexing question: "Can a family live
on $30.00 per month. Now the problem
was not easily solved because the
member did not name the place where
the feat was to be tried nor tho size
of tho family. Of course the editor of
Tho Enterprise could only take Malad
as the chosen place. After a thorough
Investigation and exact calculations
wo have arrived at three distinct con
clusions, viz: First, Malad was the
place the solon of Utah had in mind,
V because conditions hero arc more fa
vorablclin health and strength than
I any other place on earth. Malad val
ley is a veritable Eden. Second, the
size pf the average frfnilly In Malad Is
7 persons. Of course some run. up to
10 and 18, buta fair average is 7. Third,
and last, it can bo did, and at the end
of a year tho family would have a
larger bank account than the average
newspaper man saves in a lifetime.
Now then we will show how It can be
done. There are any number of sheep
camps In tho valley which could be
borrowed during tho winter months
and In the summer no house is needed.
Malad enjoys a warmer winter than
sunny Italy"and also a cooler summor
than tho Boise valley. Homes arc not
needed hcre.x Thac eliminates housc
rcntcxpcnscs. A good, healthy man,
with a little energy, could rustlo his
fuel, meats, vegetables, fruits and
Hour1 on any moonlight night, because
coalbins arc unlocked and cellars are
unbolted. With a little economy two
packages of coffee and two packages of
tea would easily last a month. For
beverage tho cost of lining would not
exceed 60 cents. Clothes, by means of
a little moon shining would not cost
over $3.09. One dollars worth of sugar
would suffice for pics, cakes and pud
dings. -Spices, such as cinnamon,
cloves, riutmegs, allspice etc., should
Mot exceed 40 cents. Butter would
cost $1.60, and milk $1.20. Music les
sons for .two oldest girls, one lesson
pet week each, $3.00. Shave for old
man and one boy, one shave each week
for each at Ave cents per shave 40
I cents. Parenthetically, we could not
give tho washing out, because it
would be inadvisable. Luxuries, such
as fresh fruits, fresh oysters and
breadfast foods should not bo over $3
per month. This makes a grand total
of 815.09. A family could therefore
save $14.91 per month with which a
I good financier could easily own the
controlling stock in a bank or two in a
I few months. Of course we do not say
I there are any Malad families of 7 who
I live on $15.09 but it can be did, wlth
I out boarding with one's mother-in-I
law, and we have proved it. Let the
I soloris of Utah rest in peace.
F. S. We almost forgot, cither tho
head of the house will have to shave
I himself or.do without chewing to
I bocco. Idaho Enterprise.
I If the Iloitse and Gov. Wells concur
in Friday's action of the Senate on
I Senate bill 1C0 tho superintendents of
schools of. the various counties will
henceforth be elected in the regular
fall elections instead of at special
I elections in July.
I "7 The curfew bill has passed the house.
The bill provides that children under
I 12 years who remain on the streets
I after 0 o'clock at night may bo lined
H $5. Allowing or permitting a child to
H bo out after that hour is also a mlsde
H mcanor, for which tho parent may bo
I lined up to $10.
H Mr, Wilson objected to tho arrest-
H ing of children and wanted to strike
H out that pirt of tho bill, but his
H amendment failed.
j Tho guide post bill was another that
fell by the waysldo in tho Senate Frl
H day. It provided for a guide post at
every road intersection in tho State
H pointing the way and telling the dls
I tanco to tho nearest town. Senator
H Murdock murdered tho bill with a lit
H tlo computation. He estimated that
It would require 100 posts for each of
sm tho twenty-seven counties at a costs
j of $10 each, or $27,000 for tho lot. Ho
jH said tho people In his county knew
IS enough to get to town without a sign
Hj post; and pcoplo who did not know
that much ho thought didn't caro
( which way they went. Tho vote on
Hj -tho bill was 5 for andO against and
m -? cadavcr was carted to the morgue.
W "Sthator Lowlsjvas tho author of the
bllL-i-Tribune'
L
LOCAL PICK-UPS
1
Mixed up With a Little of
Everything that Isn't Local.
TIIK MAN IN TIIK MOON.
Dear Janet wears a corsage low,
(Just to be In it), '
A gorgeous half moon all aglow,
(She needs to pin It).
Now patfcof tho pin Is In the lace,
Hut most of it is above that place,
And wouldn't It be a great disgrace
If the moon had a man within it.
In Town Talk.
TO WICK 1IKIIIND TIIK TIIKONK.
The hand that rocks the cradle
Is the hand that rules the world,
Hut the hand that wields the ladle
As across the knee we'ro hurled
Is a forco in shaping matters,
And, as most of us would own,
When It patters, patters, patters,
'Tis the power behind tho thrown.
Urooklyn Eagle.
"Truth," of Salt Lake, asks, "Is
oratory a lost art?" The pencil
pusher of that publication should
visit our council room at any time
there is a petition up for consid
eration. A gathering of the Latter-day
Saints of Indiana were locked out of
the court room at Indianapolis. This
has naturally caused some hard feel
ings but nothing to be compared with
the feelings that might have been
aroused had they been locked In.
If this man Lcllach is the, kind of
man portrayed in tho State press,
how very inappropriate is his name.
Instead of resembling one of our sweet
scented llowers, he seems to be more
like a jimpson weed with a dog-fennel
smell. If the man Is of no more con
sequence than stated, much good space
is being wasted, for a man of that
kind left to himself will soon reach
the end of his rope.
That committee from the .legisla
ture "has been shown" a few things
that they didn't know about the Re
form school. What they didn't know
when they left has been told them
since by tho press. The visit .to tho
institution was made on Sunday, and
evidently the committee expected to
find the state's incorrlgibles with a
bible in one hand and a golden harp
in the other, but were sadly disap
pointed. The only thing In the shape
of cither a Bible or a harp was a copy
of the list of subscribers the Home
Telephone Co. hasn't got yet, and this
was immediately shied at one of the
committee.
Because it would cost $27,000, the
legislature refused to pass a bill mak
ing it compulsory for sign-posts to be
placed at each road crossing. There
is another little matter along the
same line, that would cost little or
nothing and yet be of more service
and convenience than said sign-posts1
in fact a matter that we believe
should really be carried out. That is
the placing of family name-plates on
the front gate, or in some other place
convenient to the passerby. Persons
not thoroughly acquainted with diff
erent localities frequently mako mis
takes that are embarrassing, which
such a scheme would obviate. Not
only that, but the frequent inquiry
'Jwho lives here" would be readily
answered. Tho carrying out of such
an idea would entail butslightcxpcnse,
which could bo placed upon the in
dividual, and tho little plate would
servo well In a business way and as a
source of pleasure.
r
Thk Rkpuiilioan Is contemplating
a scheme whereby tho city of Logan
may bo beautified to no small extent
and at.-little cost, providing the citi
zens feel enough interest and pride In
their surroundings. The editor of
tills paper has a friend In tho east
who Is an architect and landscapo
gardener of considerable reputation.
With tho Idea of doing anything to
advance the causoof this paper, he has
kindly offered to give suggestions along
his line free of charge. TheJdeawo
have In mind Is to have pictures taken
of the different homes in the city that
could be improved, send tho same to
tho abovo named gentleman, who will
oifer suggestions as to how tho prop
erty and grounds can bo beautified to
the greatest extent at tho least cost.
Tub RuruiiMOAN would then print
his report. Oftentimes little sugges
tions from a competent person would
bring excellent results and be thor
oughly appreciated. Tho suggestions
will cost you nothing and they need
not bo acted upon except as tho prop
erty owner sees lit.
THE PLACE WHERE THE LEGISLATURE WAS BRIBED
The Reading Room at the A. C, which was Converted Into a Commodious Dining Room
During the Recent Visit of the Legislature.
I!y Permission of "Student Life."
Here It was that Miss Holmgren and tho students of the Domestic Science Department prepared and served
a dinner to the legislators that received unstinted praise, ahd did much to adcitlsc the Institution favoiably. Tho
above illusuatlon Is not of that dinner and the legislative body, but of the reading room when tilled with students.
Score one for our contemporary up
the street. It scooped uson the condens
ed milk factory proposition. Wheth
er the Journal's natural aptitude for
locating eveyrthlng In the way of a bot
tling concern enabled It to get on the
Inside of this In time for Its Saturday's
edition, we are not prepared to say,
but we know we were unable to get at
the facts In the matter until late Frl
da afternoon, too late for our last
edition.
What we don't know about II. G.
nayball's buslne- would fill u large siz
ed volume,but we are willing to wager a
year's subscription against $25 that in
all the eighty-two years of his business
career he never Invested In anything
that brought him better returns than
his phonograph, graphophone, gramo
phone, or whatever particular 'phone
his musical Instrument may be that
Is with the exception of his advertis
ing In Thk Rki'Uiilioan. In spite of
the fact that that class of musical In
struments is no longer a novelty, and
that most everybody has heard the
selections rendered time and again,
the music box is seldom without an
audience. It not only attracts people
Into the store, but keeps them there
while Henry, and his clerks arc on the
run trying to. take caro of their pa
trons. Tills particular instrument is
a good one, and with the enormous
megaphono attached, brings out the
reproduction in excellent shape.
Do the young ladles of Logan appre
ciate tlie real advantages they enjoy
over tho average girl born to one
of the exclusive 400 of any of
the big cities? About as soon as the
child of a parent In the "smart set"
gets rid of her bibs, she has engaged
for her a governess speaking a scoro of
languages, a music teacher, a dancing
master and sundry others who begin
the process of converting the little
lassie Into a gem of culture. If she
survives this and becomes old enough
to have her hairdono up "biscuit
shape" or "a la Psyche" she Is hustled
olf across the briny pond to receive the
finishing touches. The big cities of
the old world are. "done" and the
young lady hasjnow acquired a taste for
stunning costumes of and gay fetching
designs. The once happy child comes
out, makes a sensation and then starts
on tho toilsome Journey. She goes
shopping, to tho matinees, poses for
portraits, dabbles in water colors, fol
lows the hounds, attends the horse
show, reads romonce and sips Oolong
In bachelors studios under tho careful
espionage of a chapcrono guaranteed
to bo both blind and deaf. The young
lady becomes blase at twenty-two and
unless sho is married by tho time she
Is twenty-four, her fate Is sealed for
ever and she usually becomes a pretty
sour apple. There aro exceptions of
course, but tho average Logan girl
who has to wear wool mlts and Is per
mlted to go on slelgh-rldes unattend
ed occupies a more cnviablo position
than the angel cherubs of the upper
ten.
Representative Robeits had a nar
row escape last week, one that must'
and will linger long In his memory,
and yet 'twas not such an escape that
he can view It with pleasure or grate
ful heart. He missed everlasting fame
and glory by Just three hours and
sixty-live minutes. Dave had prepar
ed a bill "Providing for tho establish
ment, Construction and Maintcnalcc
of a System of state Highways" when
along came a Government bill of the
same Import, and covering practically
the same ground. We have the two
bills at tills otllcc, and after reading
both are struck with the remarkable
similarity of the provisions contained
In each. Mr. Roberts' bill is of Ids'
own production and framed after care
ful investigation and deep thought,
and the worth of the same is attested
by the fact that alike measure was in
troduced Into Congress.
The trials and tribulations of the
average telephone girl is "about a
plenty," and girls at our local ex
change are not favored above others.
In conversation with one the other
day, we suggested that a kick be re
gistered against certain unpleasant
phases of the business and the fol
lowing list of rules was formulated for
the guidance of subscribers: "If you
have a telephone In your otllcc or
store, ring up central then go and
wait on a customer. Pay no atten
tion to the bell when central rings
back, but go to the 'phpne In about
fifteen minutes, ring up again make a
kick if the operator is not there wait
ing for you. Always speak in an
undertone In order to make central
ask you over what you said. If she
does not hear you tell her to "wake
lip" or "take the cotton out of her
cars." Sho will admire your orglnal
ity, for sho does not hear that advice
more than forty times a day. Take your
tlmo In answering your bell, or what
Is better, do not answer it at all, but
in half an hour lingupand ask who
called you and get mad if central has
forgotten who It was. She has noth
ing else to do but remember names.
Always ask central to transfer the
message for you. She likes to do this.
It helps to kill tlmo for her. Allow
everybody to use your phone. Hang
tho receiver with tho big end up, as
In this way It gets full of dust, which
makes another cause for complaint.
Bang on the transmitter with a lead
pencil as though you Intended to
knock it through the wall. This In
variably makes It talk better. Re
fuse to pay toll messages; and If you
are on a party lino with others, always
listen to their conversation, and be
sure to want to use tho line while
they aro doing so. Whenover you sco
tho manager ask him If he cannot
give you a better phono or liayo that
one tlxed, or you will throw tho wholo
thing out of the window. Lastly, kick
against everything and cause as much
trouble for tho ompany as you can.
They aro delighted to havo vqu do so,
otherwise business would jo monotonous.
The lltcliiield Kcupcr man found a
chclet of silk elastic in the street and
after gloating over it for several days,
advertised it. A stunning young wo
man claimed the piopcrty and calmly
slipped it on her Oxford Bible.
What's the matter with a "ping
pong" club in Logan? Thcro are
more than a few "pongers" In tho
city, many of whom can beat the
fellow that has a patent on tho game.
It would seem that through an organ
.atlon, Interesting contests among
local people, and with clubs at Ogdcn,
Salt Lake and l'rovo could be arrang
ed. Tills would offer opportunities to
cultivate the best society of our sister
cities as well as affording a series of
pleasant social successes.
Tho grand 11 a sco of last years' at
tempts to have good baseball In Logan
probably killed the Idea for all time
to come, so far -as Logan fans are con
cerned. Those ardent enthusiasts
who planked down their hard-earned
"slmoleons" and whopped 'or up in
various ways feel that they received a
solar plcxls blow and are now past re
viving. Yet the memory of Eddie
Quick's assortment of double cork
screwed whisker trimmers clings with
us still and the blood courses through
the vlens as If stimulated with some
of Harper's best when wo remember
how the tow-headed youngster pulled
himself and "Stoney's Infants" out of
some terrible holes. Hartzell will al
ways occupy a warm spot in tho heart
of Logan fans, as well as Glade, tho
fellow who usually knocked four cor
ners and all tho microbes oil tho cor
puscle every time it was dished up to
him. And Billy Hoffcr, dear old Billy,
who usually did the skirt dance at
every opportunity and kept tho crowd
In an uproar, is with us still, and of
course wo can't say much about him.
He's gone up higher now, handling
"high balls" and Just us hot ones as
ever came to hhn overThc Initial bag.
In a short tlmo ho will bo handling
another kind of bawl, tho kind that
takes two arms, a kneo and sometimes
two horns to stop. And though base
ball Is relegated to the back scat for
ever we'll never forget Eddie Halm.
This boy failed, sometimes but when
he hit the horschidc squaicly on tho
nose and sent It down under the rustic
seats In the city park, Ed's friends
would tender him thanks and carry
him homo on their shoulders. Poor
old "farmer" Richards will bo remem
bered, not for what ho was, but what
ho wasn't. The boy was probably a
first-class player when at his best, but
the Infants never saw hhn that way.
Last but not least, is ho of tho crook
ed pedal extremities, Ducky Pace.
Ducky was a warm member and could
play more ball with his mouth than
Ogden could think of In a week. But
he held the balls all right and ho got
'cm whether they started to go over or
under tho grand-stand. Tho only
baseball hope for Logan this summer
is another contest between Center and
1st North street.
IS IT POSSIBLE " H
That a "Mormon-Eater" . .,- H
Is Loose in Logan?
Mr. Turner, tho business manager of jH
tills Institution, has once or twice met IH
tills on his rounds: "Isn't Moore a rab- iH
Id "Mormon-eater?" Tho editor will )H
reply by asking whether any Latter- iaLI
day Saint of this vicinity has mystcr- jH
iously disappeared since our advent in- IH
to tills territory in December of 10 01? JH
Has anyone caught us at the dead of tH
hour of midnight or at noon with a IH
leg In one hand, an arm in another and lH
with blood dripping from our tusks? jH
Or Is it felt that wo arc in tho habit ff
of eating our "Mormons" roasted or IH
stewed and that our cellar, instead of tJ
being tilled with water as stated last jH
week, Is piled up with the skeletons tf
of our victims? Dear readers, Mooro H
halls from Indiana and not tho FIJI H
Islands. Indiana has produced such jf
men as BcnJ. Harrison, Levi 1 Mor- H
ton, Senators Fairbanks and Bovcr- H
ridgoandour own .1. C. Walters; It, iH
has also produced Ilvc-leggcd cows, the H
man who beat Ills wlfo to death be- H
causo she wouldn't kneel in prayer H
with him, and pumpkins and hoop- JJ
poles Is a favorite product, but wo H
havo yet to hear of tho state prodtic-
ing a cannibal. Tho nearest thing in, H
that lino that Indiana ever produced H
was the "Wild Man of Borneo," Bar- H
num's drawing card for years. Tills. H
wild man was one Graham, of Greene- fl
county, who was led to indulge In tho- IH
fake by a story from tho pen of W. M. . H
Moss, present editor of tho Linton .
Daily Call. Graham let his hair grow H
long and mado himself into tho char-
actcr and he has been the success tho v, H
world knows. As a clincher to the ar-
gument, is there anyone who has seen.
our ft feet 10 Inches' and waist girth of
181 inches who believes that we man-
age to storo away more than two or
three of the Saints a week? Docs Mr. H
Turner, who Is of the faith, look as H
though scared to death for fear of be- H
Ing torn limb fromllmbund devoured?
By-the-way, Mr. Turner's avordupols. H
would make fair picking for most any H
carnivorous animal, yet by all that's H
holy, we havo not been tempted. Wo . H
believe that our landlady will be wll- H
ling to sign a written statement that H
at each meal we get on tho outside of
not less than four pounds of steak, H
thirty-nine biscuits, a half-peck of H
potatoes and such other sundries as H
pic, cake and ice-cream, and that for H
ono sho behoves wo have little room H
for anything between meals. Of course H
we know the question asked of "Bro."
Turner is not to be taken llterally.but H
It Is hardly worthy of consideration in H
any other way. When this paper H
shows signs of an outbreak on our jH
part; when the paper comes to you H
covered with blood, and filled with H
muttcrlngs against tho faith, then H
cage us promptly, for this ono wolf H
amongst the twenty-thousand lambs H
in this community might work great
from the A. C. of I). iH
Miss Holmgren gave a delightful H
luncheon Saturday in honor of Mrs. H
Naylor. The guests were Mesdamcs M
Robinson, Snow, Jensen and Miss M
About thirty or forty couples of M
students and faculty of tho A. C, H
styling themselves as tho "Unsophlstl- H
catcd Revelers" indulged in dancing at M
the Thatcher dancing parlor Satur- H
day evening. All those present had a M
delightful tlmo and light refresh- M
ments were served about 10:30. U
On next Saturday evening, March M
14, tho Atlieletio Association will give
Its annual minstrel. Tho boys arc H
acknowledged par excellence as enter- H
taincrs and will maintain tho good re- M
put at Ion they established at last M
year's performance. M
Wll Work Much Hardohlp. jH
Tho recont closing of tho varicua M
convents In Franco, It is learned, will H
causo tho Industry and art of laco- ' M
making to die out Thla charming H
and profitable work vrae foatorod chloi- M
ly in roltglous institutions whoro tho H
nuns wero past mistresses In tho art M
and tho poasant girls of tho neighbor- M
hood wotq pupils. fa
"Forevar and a Day." Efl
The other day Blr Coarteo Wjr IH
ham, the actor, was gtvon a dlnnor la H
London at which he mado a spe H
declartnn that ha Tould ramoabat H
his friends' kindness "forerer ac4 a H
day" a phrase which applied to H
him, b said, bceauso it tovndad kUx H
"adding a matinee on to atamlty." y 'H
