Newspaper Page Text
''Did you ever stop to think about
finger bowls?'" asked Ann, the wai
tress, of the newspaper man at break
fast. "Well, I had the subject
brought up before me right yesterday
noon. A guy from the East, a cranky
old man, looks up at me when I sets
the finger bowl before him and says:
'None for me, young woman. I can
eat a meal without having to take a
bath afterward.' I took it away, and
then he grew lucrative and wanted
'' Finger bowls is only for the
vulgar, to my mind,' he says. 'You
might as well bring me in a comb and
brush or a shaving outfit.'
" 'I guess you're right,' I says,
jollying him along a little so's I'd be
in line for a tip.
'' 'Right?' lie fires back, 'I know
I'm right. Finger bowls ain't got no
more place on a refined person's table
than tooth brushes. Now, just imfag
ine how I'd look picking up a tooth
brush and going after my molara
when I'd got through eating this sop
py pudding. Wouldn't that disgust
Which we use are without c
We believe ir PURITY.
We constantly preach PU
We always practice PUR
PURITY counts, and cou:
Ask your doctor.
Arethe ones who sit down o
They put this and that together
don't bite at all "Bargain Ad" F
"We give such
They know that they save nickl<
article they buy from us. No c
pared or financially able to give
money than we are. It actuall)
a double-seated carriage and a i
all the goods that a farmer bouE
We have thousands of bargains
only mention here a very few.
500 pairs Pants, not a single p,
$1.50, our price 92c. pair.
300 pairs Knee Pants, every ps
250 Men's Suits, not a Suit in t
our price $4.98.
100 Boys' Suits, not a suit in 1
our price 89c.
DRESS GOODS.-Here's whe
back. Don't buy a single yard
Worsteds, Woolens Outings. et<
Come, if vou don't buy it will p)ost 'ou a
1,0 0 yards Outing going at 4e yard.
SHOES! SlOE~S!--We have the Shoes,
money, you want the Shoes-Going at
Come before you buy We have lhttle
the time to dispose of goods for less thai
SPE'CIAI,-1-0 yds. 40 in. heavy White I
- t a o attato
where Good Thlngs
~~ THE S. S.
Yes, we have the best line
shown in Prosperity. We hav
Post Cards and Toilet Articles
We sell other goods also.
Yours for more 1:
Her ring was answered by an offi
ial in uniform.
"I am come," she began, "to take
he inmates for a picnic in the green
"ields and flowery meadows, It's a
Peautiful day, and it will do them a
vorld of good, cooped up as they are
n this building day after day."
The official gasped for breath.
lever in all his long experienoe had
le heard such a cool reqpest. He
imply gazed at her in astonishment.
"They can't come, madam," was
3l he could utter.
"Yes, they can. Let them all come
-every one of them.''
"We never let them out," he ad
ed in a hoarse whisper.
''Oh, yes, you do I I met two of the
ear old men just now in their long
A whole flood of light suddenly
urst upon the astonished attendant.
le saw everything clearly now.
''Ah, I seel'' replied he. ''You
rant the workhouse. It's just around
lie corner. This is the county jail.'
What the Boer Intended to Bay.
A detachment of soldiers was en
aged in clearing a certain district
. the Orange River colony of sdp
lies, and during the operations Col.
hovealong's staff oflicer came up to
Boer farmer sitting at the door of
is cottage with a large stack of oat
raw in the hack-ground.
''I have orders either to buy or
estroy all forage and food in this
istrict.'' said the officer. ''I there
>re give you notice that I am about
> set fire to that pile of oat straw.'
'Bod I tell you '' Began the
tolid Boer. as lie removed his pipe
rm his mouth.
'1o. you may Is well knowstraigit
t'. itTriipted the ollicer. ''tIat
lsistance antd objection are alike fu
"1od vould you blease '' onet
lore hegzan the farmer.
''I can listen to no excuses; I have
either time nor inclination,' ' was
ic impatient rejoinder of the officet
s lie hurried away.
''Vell, my dear.'' said the Boer to
is wife, as the stack of straw burst
ito flane and the officer went on
is way rejoicing, dose Khakis are
range peo)les. I vanted to dell him
at dis vas de oat straw I haff sold
de Colonel half an hour ago."
Thus saying he meditatively jingled
bie British sovereigns in his pocket.
No Longer A Gentleman.
''Tle ienbers of a football team
Cre in my car going to another city,'
lid a sleeping car conductor. ''They
ad to ride half the night and so they
)ok the sleeper. One youth had SO
nitts to spend, and when lie went to
ed he decided to hide the money so
obody would find it. When no one
-as looking lie slipped it. into the toe
f one of his shoes. Then he put the
hoeIs under the berthI and went to
eep to' dream of his fortune below.
'Well, along in) the night the por
'r etune1 in antd heg.an his work of
hinin'g shoes, Hie found the jay's
hoes with the 10( cents in it and
on ought to have seen him smile.
D)is man am suttinly a gentleman,'
e said. 'Jes think-leavin' me 80
ents jes for blinkin' his shoes.'
''The next morning wvhen the play
*r found his 80 cents gone he almost
ad a fit. He made the porter give
rim hack his money. The porter was
nad. He came to me and said:
''Say, boss, you know that feller
ih said wus a gentleman fo' leavin'
nie 80 cents fo blackin' his shoes?'
'''Yes,' I replied.'
'' 'Well, he ain't no gentleman
mo's a jay. HIe was usain' dat shoe as
i 1han1k.' ' '--Denver Post.
Offered Choice of Seats.
When sihe entered the car it wvat
eaisy to see that she was angry. His
shin was high in the air, and her lips
were set in a rigid line. The car wvat
erowded and every seat was occu
p)iedl, so she pushed her wvay up front
with a determination that gave fur
ither evidence of her vexation. Shi
r'eachedoi the front end of the ear just
a tail, good looking man rose and:
lifting his hat, asked in a pleasani
voice, ''Won't you have this seat?'
''No, I won't'' she s;napped. The
young man was surprised, but sal
down again without speaking. .Foi
ab)out five minutes she rode along
banging on to the straps. Then the
ear gave a sudden jolt, and she wat
lthrowvn unceremoniously into the
vivid red and, struggling to rise, wau
almost on her feet when anothet
lurch threw her back again.
''Madam,'' ho said quietly, in the
satme good humored 'tone, ''if yor
refer this scat to the one I offered~
before you are quite welcome to t."
Daughter-Why is that paper call
91a riief, papa?
Judge-That is a little legal joke,
"Well, I agreed with him so's not
to be out of the money in the tip
'Just then a woman at another
table began using the bowl. 'Now, 1
look at that fat thing there,' he says.
'She's washing her whole face. If i
she had a bathing suit along I believe
sh6 'd try to take a dip in that bowl.
Ndw, look at her I Do you suppose
she could eat with delicatessen, for
instance, with the King of England '
' 'Well, .I should say not, most
emphatic,' I replied.
"That tickled him, and when he .
left I found 25 cents staring me In
the face. A few more quarter guys
with kicks like that and I" petition
the keeper of this jaw joint to cut
out the bowls. Anyway, they are noth
ing but vulgarities, ain't they?"
No Pleasure Trips for Them. I
An amusing scene wias witnessed
one day last summer in a country N
town. An old lady, with her coach- t
man, drove up in a large brake and I
stopped opposite a huge red brick
xception the purest grade.
ITY when preparing medi- d a
its for much, in medicines. * t
,nd consider things carefully. r
and draw conclusions. They t
'ins at I c. paper, Towels 5c. a
,s, dimes and dollars on every s
ther merchant is better pre- (
you "greater values" for your t
required a two-horse wagon,
)ne-horse buggy to carry off
ht from us last week for $100.
In every department. We can
ir in the lot worth less than S
Ir worth 50c, our price 23c. pr. t
he lot worth less than $7.50, i
he lot worth less than $2.50, "
re we rip competition up the ~
f your Brilliantines, Henriettas,
:., until you have seen our line. t
nd save you many dollars.s
rou'vo got the money, we want the
half price. .
time to write advertisements, but all
i all the rest.
The Fair and Square Dealer.
Lomespun at only 59c.
S*o1Ek Is the con
n a villagle store, .Y
Cli1o,etargues for -
sk This done, the
of Jewelry arnd Watches evre
e all the noveaties in this line.
S. S BIRGE CO.
A Suitable Book.
Customer (hesitatingly)-I sup
pose-e-you have some-er--suit
able books for a man-er-about to
be marriedl Bookseller-Certainly,
sir. Here, John, show this gentleman
some bf our account books, largest
All persons holding claims against
the estatb of Robert L. Schumpert are
hereby notified to present the same
properly verified on or before Decem
ber 10, 1906, to the undersigned Ad
ministratrix or to Mr. Jno. M. Kinard
at The Commercial Bank of Newber
ry, S. C. All persons indebted to said
estate must make payment to me
Carrie A. Schumpert,
Administratrix of the estate of
Robert L. Schumpert.
November 7, 1906.
Must Have Been in Gotham.
Well, doctor, what. do you recom
''I think you need mud baths.'
"Mud bath? Great heavens, man,
I've just come through a bitter politi
cal campaign.'--New York Tribune.
A Healing Gospel.
The Rev. J. C. Warren, pastor of
Sharon Baptist Church, Belair, Ga,
says of Electric Bitters: It cured me
of lame hack, stiff joints, and a com
plete physical collapse I was so weak
it took me half an hour to walk a mile
Two bottles of Electric Bitters have
made me so strong I have just walked
three miles in 50 minutes and feel like
walking three more. It's made a new
man of me.' Greatest remedy for
weakness and all Stomach Liver and
Kidney complaints. Sold under guran
tee at W. E. Pelham & Son's Drug
Store. Price bee.
A maiin seldom works as hard at any
other time as he does just before lie
goes on his vacation or just after lie
Chas. W. Moore, a machinist, of
Ford City, Pa., had his hand fright
fully burned in an electrical furnace.
He a pplied Bucklen's Arnica Salve
with the usual result: "a quick and
Pei-fect cure." Gieatest healer on
earth for Burns, Wounds Sores,
Eczema and Piles. 25c. at W. E. Pel
ham & Son, Druggist.
It doesn't take a very smart man to
guess the rest of a story after a wo
man has told one-third of it.
He Was In Trouble.
"I was in trouble, but found a way
out of it, and I'm a happy man again
since Dr. King's New Life Pills curd
me of chronic constipation," says E.
W. Goodloe, 107 St Louis St., Dallas,
Tex. Guaranteed satisfactory. Price
25 cents at W. E. Pelham & Son's drug
Later on you may have an oppor
tunity to walk on the pavements made
of your good intentions.
Luckiest Man in Arkansas.
"i'm the luckiest man in Arkansas,'
wvrites II L. Stanley, of Bruno, "since
the re-storat iou of my wife's health
after five years of continuous coughing
and bleeding from the lungs; and
owe my good fortune to the world's
greatest medicine, Dr. King 's New Dis
covery for Consumption, which I know
from experience will cure consumptior
if taken in time. My 'wife improve(
with first bottle and twelve bottlei
eompleted the cure.'' Cures thh worsi
coughs and colds or money refunded
A t W. E. Pelhamn & Son's druggist
50u. and $1.00. Trial bottle free.
that will last a life time is what ye
want. Our Ok gans have a pure ton
and lovely cases We can suppl
you with an Organ that will plnw i
every particular for omay $iim and 4'l
delivered. Write us for our specii
terms of payment, and for illustratiori
of the beautiful Organs referred to.
If you prefer a Fiano we have beat
tiful and good new Uprights from $16
up on easy terms.
Malone's Music House,
Buggy For Sah
First-ciass Ieather quarier-top buggy guar-.
anteed;. set of single buggy harness, S6.00
Georgia Vocicle Manufacturing Co.,
esW. Mitchell st. Atlanta. da.
J. Ws WHITE.
To every cusl
chases $5.00 ur c
and Notions we'
tern of their own
The offer begins Mo
and holds good until M(
Don't think because wt
much our selection Is n
stantly getting in new 4
Be sure to come to see
Best Stoves U
tween East at
For full inforn
1 SEA B
i AIR -LINE
Two Daily Pullman Ve
Between SOUTH a
The Best Rates and Rc
a Via Richmond and
Norfolk arnd Steari
N ashville, Mempt
iLouis, C hicago, N(
Points South and SoutF
I and Jacksonville an<
PoSSITIVELy THE SHC
se-Por detailed Informatio
man res,ervations, etc., app
rboard Air Line Railway, or
Passenger Agent, Columbia
C. F. STE WAR(T, A
W. L BURROUGHS,'N
omer who pur
iver of DryGoods
will give one pat
nday, November 12th,
>nday, November 26th.
P have been selling so
otgood. We are con
,oods in all our lines.
ITY, S. C.
lation write to
er Traffic Manager,
Wilmington, N. C.
~- RAIL WAY.
-- EAST -- WEST.
stibuled Limited Trains
nd NEW YORK.
NG CAR SERVICE.
ute co all Eastern Cities
Washington, or via
is, Louisville, St.
tw Orleans, anci All
I all points in Florida
RTEsT L INE BETWEEN
3, rates, schedules, Pull
Ly to any agent -f The Sea
Jos. W. Stewari, Traveling
sst.Gfeni. Pass. Agt.,
Pass- Agt. Columhia SCr