Newspaper Page Text
iTlraiTtifSfcarnV TTilL round trin tickets
will be sold at reduced Kates. Rates for Sunday, 13th lrist., half.
fare. Special Trams will he run as-follows:
jr .TmSr ,, .,
A. - JE A. r Jr
" A ffi'eshsnppiy,jnst'rreeelvcHl rf
OIaX JS 33 3E2 X) ,
All this year's purchase. Call and get a cata
.m .., ,.
Every style and pattern, as cheap as the cheapest;
Give us a call and examine our stock.
ap2l ly J . U. PECOR & CO.
VflPb jftf BB ABM BHUB9 MBI IW U
Groceries, Hats and Caps
Boots and Shoes, Queensware mnd Hardware,
Highest cash'prlcd paid for Grain and Country
Produce. .. Jyl5l Mt. OLIVET. .
nwmkm flfctjltl Mteft m ftteiO
s l!pl' A"! H W WET ITifW i fyJWUUf
dealer J iDWli Kl Hyrtois.Vi BiHt. Iron
apd Lead Plp, Globa, Ancleand Checlc valvae,
5&bbFr Rm,. and 8wf
rantdapddonewnwiprpmlMkl. ttcon a street
Leave Maysviilek '.!. 5:45 a.in$J
Arrive Camp Grounds 7:15 a. m. 9;45 a. m..
LeaveParjs,,.?...i.y...r. ...-....... 6:30 a. m .!
RBttirainglfeaeGampfGrounds for Maysville, 5;30 p. m. and
7:15;p. For Paris, 5:30 p. m.
The schedule on: Sunday, the 13trriiistr3 y -
Special Trim leaves Maysville !.'!?..:. ..8:30 a. m.
" " Covington 7:30 a- m.
" l Lexington 8:30 a. m.
Allraingtujiiing leave Camp Grounds at 4:00 p, m. sharp.
We will offer fbrthe next THIRTY DAYS, our enttlre Stock of
U A Tv mV&WKi r ft D v
lift I OWmMfVniO
:: iENT.'S FURNISHING GOODS, &e., ' '
Below Cost, to close out nnd make room for Our PALL and WINTER GOODS. Call early
and secure your BARGAINS and be convinced thatyojt.eanjbuymore GoodtUfoj:
money at the Olotlxi.33.gr Kou.fe:"thimat.iaiiy
' " w " ' ' "
other hoe-Hn ithe, Sta.ier, ,r..Wil,, -
SceoBcl SrcfTMayHviUorKy 3 IIL VIQRQ I & LEE; Proprietor
OK account of my continued ill nealth, 1
have concluded, as soou as practicable, to
retire from the dry goods trade, 1 now oiler my
entire stock'toi'saleto apyonercbau wishing
toi engage lntlid business, aridLwlll rroniitbe
1st day of July'sell'my goods FOR GASH,untIl
disposed of, which vUl enable me to otfer to
the retail trade some special bargains.
All persons knowing themselves indebted to
me)wlll please calFanp settle at once; as Jtam
anxious to square my books. Respectfully, '
apllldly H. . MM OPT.
J. C. .. PECOR & CO.,
mum' Uwv,. a 3 i t a. m .fi
Headquarters for all kinds of Confectionery
Fruits, Ctfn'neil'Ubods, etW rrf ;. T- ;
V 2 Sr ; & W . vf ' W
Fresh Stock and Lowv Prices.
Come and see me if you want to save money.
F. L. TRAYSER,
Frosil St.f 4 r III11 Honftc
Grand, Uprightaud Square Pianos, also the
best make of Orgaus at lowest nanufacturers.'
pirlcesjunTngaud Repairing'' " vnl.7
THE LATEST SENSATION.
4kYard5lLawn, clfol'cestylesVnd fnsC coidrs
kt?5fopifti" nnr vnrri. fiOO vnrHs Iiidin L.lnen
ceiitsper yard.! 2"iO. pair$3JregrjDur made
nriAn'M linlf hnsn nt. 10 nnnts nor tinlr.
goods proportionately low.
BURGESS & NOLIN.
July 0, 1882.
. G. W. GEISEL, ,
Fruits and, Vegetables in season. Your patronage
respectfully solicited. jHdlv
y f t
J. &. SOTJSLEY,
farakrtted and' all okxwarr
SdTIMATSB on 'Forth 8trMt lstwaXL
arket and Limertoe.t "j . mar46mdaw
You ma3? notch it on the palin's as a mighty
To make your Judgment by de clo'es dat kivers
up a man;
For 1 hardly needs to tell you how you often
A fifty dollar saddle on a twenty dollar boss,
An' wurkin'in de disklver as
Dat de fines' shuck may bide de meanes' nubbin
in a row !
I tliink a man has got a mighty slender chance
Dut holds on to his piety but one day out of
Dat talks about de sinners wid a heap o solemn
And nebber draps a nlckle In de mlssio nary
Dat's foremost in de for r aisin'
allde ch unes.
But lays aside 'liglon wid his Sunday pantaloons!
I nebber Judge o' people dat I meets' along de
By de places whar dey.come fum an' de houses
whar dey stay.
For de bantam chicken's awful fond o roostlu'
Anrde turkey-buzzard sails above de eagle in
de sky ;
Dey ketches little ralnnerz in de middle ob de
An' you finds de smalles' possum up de blgges'
kind o' tree !
Could Not Run Steadily.
I sometimes think that any man Tyljo
is graving old, and to whom it has been
appointed in this life to earn his own
bread, ought to be thankful to find himself
in any settled and fairly creditable
vocation. It terds to make one so to
look around upon those vho started
along with us, and to remark here and
there the clever fellow who would not
settle to steady work, who would not
get. into one of the recognized grooves
of human affairs. Such clever fellows
tend to be unsteady in another sense
than lack of fixity of oim, and here
doubtless is a main cause of their failure.
But even where this is not so you
know the sorrowful upshot of not sticking
to the track, not choosing a line and
holding to it. The income is
ous ; all incomes are precarious that are
made up of scraps. Give us steady
wages, whether little or great. You
have known a brilliant man with a hundred
times the brains of some wealthy
mortal who. wants to get into Parliament
(with the single purpose of serving his
country) thankful to earn a few pounds
by doing election jobs, writing squibs,
and cauvassing, and meekly bearing to
bo sworn at by the wealthy mortal in
the hour of defeat. It is verv sad to
find a man of true ability aud eloquence,
and content to work very hard, waiting,
like a cab on the stand, for some .one
to hire his brains ; for some one to get
him to write on some subject in which
he feels no interest, or to puff some
doing which he sees to bo contemptible.
Aud such a man, living from hand to
mouth, even if he.has no one but himself
to support, must many times look
forward to the future with fear, thinking
of the days when the poor, wearied brain
and hand will not be able to work any
more, and when there will uo longer be
the nerve to push himself forward amid
younger and fresher competitors. Surely,
thus meditating, and beholding how
sclid mortals who never had half his
ability, and who never worked half so
hard, but who got into one of the main
grooves and kept to it, have distanced
him in life are judges, bishops, or at
the least are thriving business men and
rosy country parsQUjfiJlfog recognized
positions, and not without the confidence
thence arising the brilliant Bohemian
that never would run .steadily in
harness must f Gel that he has made a '
inisfeke in his choice pf life.
j A prmtmj; fljod,, Jik, j
motion fr.jdjygDt &&?, in Qrdgrv
Txs gpeakiblr trumpet m said to hgff
been invented by Alexander the Grai
1 'j'1 ---- - - , n . ..-.. .......
HEW TO THE LENJf, tBT THE CHIPS FALL WHERE THEY MAY."
U . .
VOLUME 1. MAYSVILLE, THURSDAY EVENING, AUGUST 10, 1882. NUMBER 223.
ntjiiiwuiMiiwillMWwi ; ' i wr ,- M4MMW
Observations of Rev. Gibe Tucker.
The Ready Letter Writer.
The third letter of the series, is that
of a yonng man asking for the position
of humorist-on -an English paper. It
should be in about the following
White River; Colorado, )
March 1, 1882. j
Editor of London Gurgle:
Dear Sir It is with some hesitation
that I address you. on. this occasion, relative
to the subject of securing a lucrative
position on your great journal 03 chief
humorist and pun promoter.
I am aware that my experience so far '
has been somewhat limited in this line,
but I hope by patience and a proper
course of dieting to bring myself up to a
point where I may establish a reputation
both for myself "and your paper.
1 have attempted several times to hold
down a like position on American journals,
but so far have not made that
mark which my ungovernable.
seems to crave. I hope to strike
the popular gait in a few weeks so that
in England I would liave no trouble.
My jokes are of a grave and at times
almostj sad complexion. They are a
style of grief tainted humor, which cannot
but attraot the kindly notice of your
Heretofore I have filled the position
of undertakers' foyernan with wonderful
success and could still holdt&e position
if I desired it, but it is too cheerful in its . ,
nature. I want something that will
chasten and soften mv rebellious nature.
I want something that wjji give me a
constant reminder of my dying .
tion. What I want is to mingle with
woe and suffering. . Iieel as though life
should not be a holiday and a pjenic.
It should be a groan, a shudder, or "a
prolonged death rattle. I am fully impressed
with the idea that we can only
be purified through suffering. No man
can fit himself for death if he glides .
evenly through life.
It is therefore my desire to enter .your
office and be thrown in constant coQtact
with the corpse-like presence of your
jokes. I would love to mingle with the
bony relics of your staff- and hear their
grim and awful puns.
Please do not turn me away, but give
me a chance to sit in the ghostly glimmer
of your smile.
I do not care for a large salary on the
start. All I would require would be the
wholesome contact I would be brought
into with the ghouls and wreokers of
human hilarity. My morbid longing for. .
the dead and decaying humor of forgot-
ten years would then be put at rest. ;
This wild hunger for something acutely
sad and heart-broken would be stilled, t..
Please write me as soon as possible
wad believe me ever
Dearily yours, v'
Somber 0. PaiiIj. '
Laramie Boomerang ' ' '
A young, rich, and pretty widows in
London, with plentv of animal SDirita.
and in want of some innocent amusement,
hit on the oriffinal tvlan of
inscribing name m the books'"
of a matrimonial agency as' a ,
wealthy but blind candidate for matrimony.
The number of suifors wasM
legion, and the young widow amused V!
herself to her heart's content. . Some
came in shabby clothee, somo stretched .
themselves at full leDgth on the sofa and. ,
made themselves quite at home, out
spoke in tones of the deepeat affeqtion.
The charming widow was, however, aooa , .
obliged to, cat the joke short, forpnfltof
her snitora, afr annexing a pair ,
dleatickM introduced a bunch of ;loog .
finger into her pocket and lafcakacUd
her parse. . . - : n I
amok the" ryiwV M mM
.hi oh:v. t -.:. i-' ;i;m.irsoui tnc