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THE BOURBON NEWS, PARIS, KENTUCKY, JANUARY 24, 1913.
Good Work Done Cheap;
Cheap Work Done Good!
TRE- J9B R00fflS OF
Are prepaired to do the best of
Printing on short notice such as
and, in fact, everything
that is printed.
Orders for Engraving,
such as Wedding An
given prompt attention.
' . -""
Let us figure with you on
on ybur next work
Our facilities are the best, having
just installed two of the latest im
proved Chandler & Price Job
Presses come around and see them
Our type is new and modern
Che Bourbon Hews,
1 04 Issues a Year for
Advertising rates reasonable and made
known on application
ONE WITH A FUZZY HAT
By GEORGIA HORN.
"Land sakes! There he comes
again, Susie! Why, you know the
one with the fuzzy hat an' the plait in
his overcoat. He sure has got his eye
on you! Yestid'y when I come up to
the table to take his order instead of
you he was so upset he ordered rasp
berry sundae instead of his usual
chocolate soda. An' raspberries out
for months! Go on none of us will
interfere you wait on him!
"Mebbe he's a millionaire. That
would be fine for Susie. "Nobody can
act more like a lady than she can,
only she's got her hair too light. I'm
so glad minp is a nachurl blond. Lilly,
see that old lady just coming in? The
one who looks as though she was go
ing to die in a minute or two, and
bought her clothes in the remnant
basement? Well, you listen to me
that's old Mrs. White-Jones, and she
has a million relatives waiting to get
their hands on her bank account, and
she's tough as a nut. Travels all over
the world alone at her age and never
loosens up a penny.
"Y'ought-a seen her nephew in here
with her the other day. He helped
her out of the electric just as careful
as though he was afraid she might
accidently sink through the pavement.
'Auntie, dear,' says he, 'try a riffle
parfait with nuts you'll like it!'
'Young man,' says she, 'piffle parfaits
are 25 cents a piece and as long as
I'm paying the bill I guess you'll get
along on a ten cent drink! Extrava
gance is the curse bf the age!' And
then I'll bet she drove downtown and
bought a bushel of diamonds.
"Two v'nilla sodas and one mint
lemonade? Yes'm. No'm; there ain't
no strawberries now. Why, I don't'
know I expect they get tired growing
this time of year.
"See that party in the blue suit and
feathers? She's mad because I can't
pick strawberries off'n the chandelier
for her. I'bet it hasn't been very long
that she had enough money to come
into a swell shop like this here one
"Yes'm, you ordered chocolate. Beg
pardon you said so distinctly. I didn't
hear you mention mint lemonade at
all. Well, of course I can change it
if you say so.
"No use trying to please that bunch,
ordering chocolate and then claiming
it was mint lemonade! Gee, this sort
of a job is fierce and wearin' on a
"Look there, quick! Just coming
in! That's Daisy Duberry, and she
draws $800 a week for doing a half
hour stunt on the stage! Think of
it! She doesn't look so much, but I
wish to goodness I knew where she
buys her complexion. Isn't it a
peach? I'm crazy about that hat she's
got on, and I'm going to fix my hair
like hers before I'm a day older.
"Oh, look at that! Kitty nabbed
her! 'Spose she thinks she'll get
tickets or something, an I've always
waited on Miss Duberry -whenever
she's been in! I'm going to tell Kitty
what I think of her! Jealous thing!
Not that I care for the tip she al
ways gives it's just the principle of
"Think you're siriart don't you, Kit?
I'll pay you back for jumping jay cus
tomers she is, too! Miss Duberry is
a p'rticular friend of mine, I'd have
"Yes, sir; I was just on my way to
wait on that farthest table. Nobody
sems to pay attention to the new cus
tomers unless it's me. Not that I
want to name any names, but there's
no use expecting Kitty to wait on any
one else; as long a Miss Duberry isJ
"Guess that'll hold Kit for awhile.
The old man's cross, and he won't do
a thin to her.
"Two maple sundaes and two hot
"Get next to my parties in the cor
ner, girls. They made their hats at
home and they've got on rings enough
to light the shop if they were hung
up high. What do you make of that?
They must be somebody. Nobody but
big guns can be so contrarylike. The
others don't dare.
"What? Hot chocolate? Beg par
don, ma'am, I'm vur-ry careful to
get my orders correctly, and what you
said was two maple sundaes and two
chocolate ice cream sodas. Nothing
was said about hot chocolate at all.
But, of course, we aim to please, and
I'll change it for you if you insist!
"Gee! I wish women wouldn't
change their minds sol They never
know what they order! Here, Josie,
you take these hot chocolates to those,
two vinegar cruets with the awful
hats and the rings over there I've
got to fix my hair.
"It's about time for that young man
with the lovely eyes to drop in for
his tea. I think he must be English,
and sometimes younger sons get to
be dukes and things, you know!
Where's my vanity case? Well, I like
your nerve, Susie! I
"Yes, sir, I'm attending to business.
I didn't know you objected to a girl's
sitting down just a minute when she's
worked till she's rea'dy to drop!
"I'd like to hit him, I would! Al
ways snooping around for fear we're
not earning our pay! Gee! The life
we are leadin is a hard one for "a
girl." Chicago Daily News.
Where Her Shoe Were.
Dorothy, aged five, was having
trouble assembling her clothes on
"Why, "where are your shoes,
Dorothy?" asked mamma.
"I don't know, mummle," the five-
year-old gravely replied. ""But I saw
them walking around wltbTTMargaret
in them last night after -I-had gone
to bed." -Indianapolis News."
SSourbon Sarage dc Supply Co.
Supplies of All Kinds, Repairing, Etc.
SSourbon Sararge $ Supply Co.
I C. 1
C. M. CLAY.IPresident
ED. BURKE, Vice-President
JNO. T.i COLLINS, Sec'y-Treas
S. K. Nichols, General Manager
SALES TUESDAYS, THURS
DAYS and SATURDAYS.
S We have buyers forlthe American Tobacco Co., thelR.'J. Reynolds Co., Liggett & Myers,
the Lorillard Co.. besides various independent and local buyers.
We have an abundance of wagon room and free stabling of horses. Bring us your
tobacco; wefguarantee you a square deal. J
WEi SULIU I YOUK l-W I KOINAOt
Bourbon Tobacco Warehouse Company I
Children's Work a Specialty.
Special Prices For
Beef Hides Until
We pay 121-2c for green
beef flhides. Call us up
or tyring if to our place.
B Opp. Hotel
Call Easb Tenn. Phone 374
C. M. Clay, H. S. Caywood,
Jno. T. Collins, R. M. Jacoby,
W. C. Dodson, Lee Stephenson,
W. M. Rogers
S. K. Nichols
iQew Coal yard
I Have opened a Coal Yard at the Dow I
w Q4 - TT. 1X7.. J Qa-
I Rich Mountain Coal I
Kentucky Jem Coal
I Last longer and furnishes t ajgreater amount l
of heat than other coals -I
O. R. TURNER, I
Windsor Dow Building E. T. Phone 58 I
GEO. W. DAVIS
FUNERAL DIRECTOR AND LICENSED EIBAIMEL
BOTH'PHONES DAY 137; NIGHT 299.