Newspaper Page Text
(Copyright 1908, by Byron Williams.) Endangerin' Tom. Tom Crumb, of our village, wa'n't muc of a "dude-" I s'pose he wuz what squeamish folks might call "rude!" But, somehow, Tom never could flgger it out That style helped in movin' old b'ildin's about! I knowed him way back in th' 6o's, er so, When both Tom and me wus a goin' ii slow, And Tom wuz as poor-well, as poor as could be, Exceptin' he wuzn't as poor-quite--a me! He tuk up with movin', an' teamin', an' stch, And gradually saved 'til he saved himself rich; But Tom sed, a givin' my shoulder a crack: "I hain't never had a bled shirt on my back!" Th' trouble cum on when he tuk sick an' died His darter wuz allus too long on 'er pride. They buried poor Tom-'twas a tarnation sin In tailor-made clothes, all starched up tew his chin! An' most of us fellers who'd knowed him fer years, Attended th' obsequees harrered by fears We're scared tew this day that his folks did him dirt, By sendin' him off in that biled linen shirt! Us fellers is feared that Tom didn't git in. A wearin' them elothes, all starched up tew his chin; We're scared that St. Peter gist slammed shet th' door, Not knowin' him,, 'count of th' clothes that he wore! ". s Stray Thoughts. When it comes to blubbering, a whale can make Johnny look. like a deuce spot. A bicycle always takes especial de light in throwing a woman when she has a hole in her stocking. When you are out walking with her a woman's shoe always comes untied just as you pass the busiest corner in town. An Iowa grocer advertised for a boy and the next night his wife presented him with twins, both boys. It pays to advertise. "Some girls," remarks an ezchange, w"a e o ernD; they's, ht be one once that made me feel like there was going to be a terrible drought that year. Hank Scott's Shirts. I remember Hank Scott well. He lived out in my town and one day he visited the city and bought a half dos en flannel shirts at a bargain sale. On the way home there was a wreek and Hank was thrown through a bridge in to the water. Fortunately, he was unharmed, and reached home in an hour by walking vigorously. He groped his way up to bed and lighting the lamp was surprised at his wife's exclamation: "Well, for heaven's sake, Hank Scott, what do yen mean by coming home without any shirt and one d them new-fangled neckties around your neck" The shirt had shrunk! Rank had seven eabldrea and they started these -ktp the line. The oldest boy sq them atte n h the lii atl E on th. hirt and thr purple 1ate a bi ae scot awakened ad tern. ued it. S#acn the., Hank always . s his SanmI shbirts tre his homse me haat. "t may est a litutle o attW the start," says Hank. "but hM a atnse .Aiish leas worriyin' . are Wards" I see that a New York maowalus talled the "Lamb" It dead. I sapeu sh liean refused to lie down with R mad the wdes gobbled the -alo BORAX IN THE DAIRY A Matter of Profitable Interest to the Farmer and Dairyman The problem of keeping sweet all the utensils used in connection with milk and cream selling, and butter making, has been a serious one with the farmer. He has come to realize fully that the slightest taint or hint of staleness left in a can, tin or churn may ruin a whole output; that the taint which is left is in the form of bacteria which grow and multiply in milk or butter, producing disastrous results. The farmer has learned that hot water won't rinse away the greasy residue in dairy utensils. He has learned that soap leaves a residue of its own which is, if any thing, worse than the milk or cream residue, and it is little wonder that that there has been a constant clamor for a dairy cleanser and sweetener that will meet modern requirements. A few of the largest creamery es tablishments have called experts into consultation on this problem and have with this scientific aid hit upon a prod uct of nature which exactly fills the bill-borax. Scientists have long known borax as a cleanser, a sweetener and an anti septic iestroyer of bacteria and germ growths. Destroys all that is harm ful and promotes and preserves fres1h ness, sweetness and purity, rilieving the dairyman land dairy housewife of drudgery and of needless work and worry. Its cheapness and value should give it first place in the necessities of every dairy. The cow's udder is kept in a clean, healthy and smooth condition by washing it with borax and water, a tablespoonful of borax to two quarts of water. This prevents roughness and sore ness or cracking teats, which make milking time a dread to the cow and a worry to the milker. TO MOTHERS.-A dainty book in col ars, called "Jingle Book," sent free to any Mother sending name and address Df her baby, and tops from one pound carton of "20 Mule Team" Package Borax, with 4c in stamps. Address Pacific Coast Borax Co., Chicago. IlL The Details. "The particulars-?" "Well, Capt. Feebles was shot in the back, originally, and went around with his back bent a good deal like an in terrogation mark, until he got a port ly slab of back pension. Then he straightened up his back until it was decidedly concave instead of consider ably convex, dyed his whiskers a fighting black and set out in pursuit of a buxom widow, who, being a widow, knew exactly how to be caught while maintaining all the symptoms of eluding capture to the very best of her ability."--Smart Set. Paving the Way. "George," said the pretty girl, "I know you're awful bashful." This was portentous, with leap year so new. He blushed assent. "And you'd have proposed to me ex eept for that?" This, too, he was bound to acknowl edge. "Well, I would have accepted," she went on, "and so that's settled." Discussing the matter later she ex pressed a natural pride that she had not taken any advantage of the sea son. Just a Deduction. A polite little girl was dining one day with her grandmother. Every thing at the table was unusually dainty and unexceptionable, but on this occasion the little girl found a hair in her fish. "-ndma," she said, sweetly, "what "Ha ibut, ma dear." "Oh." replied the child, "I thought, perhaps it was pmermaid." FRIENDS HELP. St. Paul Park Incident "After drinking coffee for breakfast I always felt languid and dull, having no ambition to get to my morning duties. Then in about an hour or so a weak, nervous derangement of the heart and stomach would come over me with such force I would .requently have to lie down. "At other times I had severe head aches; stomach finally became af tected and digestion so impaired that I had serious chronic dyspepsia and constipatlon. A lady, for many years State President of the W. C. T. U., told me she had be greatly benefited by quitting coffee and using Postn Food Co.se; she was troubled for years with asthma. She said it was ase a.os to quit col5t when she ýasid el lbeleur aU oiund rimmeate alton ceas ing1 cot lade stad 'beinnn eat=m twice a da' She wasn woltly eared. Still anotber teind tbol me that Postum Poot b eea was a Godsend to heher hsit tro ble haaing been relieved aite aeisng off eaise and taks on "So maay such eses came to my mote that I concluded cotee was the mea .r sef y tro ble and I quit aad took up. Postm. I am mere than pleased to as thait my dhys of trouble havey dsaeared I am wel ad bapp: "There'sb a Remaon. Re.d " lead to Wlarilwe" in pas. Ea reast'ts alve rlelSert A nw sar 4PPpR i. ttl "me tu tima. They g I ~ni ta~~lie= ·iFf-r ·nJr cmap ALMOST A MIRACLE. Raised Up When Science Said There Was No Hope. G. W. L. Nesbitt, Depot Street, Marion, Ky., writes: "I was a chronic invalid with kidney troubles, and often wished death might end my awful suffer ings. The secretions were thick with sedi ment, my limbs swollen and mn right side so nearly par alyzed I could not raise my hand above my head. The doctor held out no hope of my r covery. and I had given up, but at started using Doan's Kidney Pills made a rapid gain. After three months' use I was well and at work again.'" Sold by all dealers. c0 cents a box. Foster-Milburn Co., Buffalo, N. Y. Good Work Has Slow Growth. Baci oft spent 26 years on his his tory and Webster 36 on his dictionary. 'Tis tLe same with tLa great inven tions. It took years of study and ex periment to perfect them. Everything must have a foundation, otherns :e it cannot stand, and the more solid the fUundation the safer is the structure. Do You Itch? The cup of human misery is never quite full until soma form 3f itching sl. in disease is added. Then it over flows. E ant's Cure In a specific for any itching trouble ever known. One applica.t on relieves. One box is guar anteed to cure any one case. Louisiana has a steel sawmill with a e apacity of 600,0ql0 feet a day, which is said to be the largest in this country. NO MARRIAGE BELLS FOR HIM. "What's the matter, boy?" "Gee! Mamie says it's leap, year an' she's goin' ter propose to me!" BUYING PAINT BLINDLY. Many people look upon paint buy Sing as a lottery and so it is, the way they do it. It is not ne essarily so, howcver. Pare White Lead and lin I seed oil are the essential elements of good paint. Adulterants in white lead can be easily found by the use of a blowpipe. Adulterations in linsee4 oil can be detected with a fair degree of certainty. See that these two elements are pure and properly put on and the paint will stay put. National Lead Company, Wood bridge, Building, New York City, will send a blowpipe outfit and instruc tieos for testing both white lead and Use Where Needed. Starboarder-I'm going to buy the landlady a bottle of hair restorer. Hallroom-Why she seems to have a good head of hair. Starboarder-Oh, hers is all right. Irm going to gt her to use it on the mattresses.-Philadelphia Recora. Important to Mothers. Knamine carefully every bottle of CASTORIA a safe and sure remedy for infants and children, and see that it Bears the Signature of 46 7tI In Use For Over 30 leau The Kind You Have Always Bought Reflected Sentiment. S"Whenever that man speaks, you Sknow exactly' what he thinks," r I marked thE admiring auditor. "I shouldn't say that," answered the cautions person. "But you know ex I actly what he thinks his constittents want him to think." ds the Spo" -i0oi we struck is the bIttSt e º wile others have passe a siuplr becaUse it cares your L Aches, Brpises, Sprans, Cats and I Burns quieter than any other hnow lemedy. Hunt's ~Lghtning Oil It's r hae for Chigger bites also. To overcome self I the true sirit of malneis. No easy victory ever r produced any great result. It is the Shand to hand struggle that carries the 1 leld-. W muses Cpuin Cures on i an ses. It ies n i peasat to tome- Taint batte Uko--rguair sss so =.o .at drgst. =I put myself In the way oa thins Shappenintg ant theyr happ -mdThSI "Every Month" writes Mrs. E. Fournier of Lake Charles, La., "I used to suffer from headache, backache, pain in my side, pressing-down pains, and had Fw r fainting spells, was nervous and had no patience or courage. I could not wear my corset and could hardly walk. The doctor could not relieve me, and I thought I would die. "At last I took Your Wine of Cardui P *iand now I have no more pain, can walk as far as I want, and am like a different woman." Cardui is a specific female remedy, composed of purely vegetable in gredients, perfectly harmless and recommended for all sick women, old or young. . WRIT FOR FRS BOOK r ite fr .BookZfoonewi.,pton cans strnt and Ominous. "I'he bookkeeper," said the junior partner, "has been married nearly four months now." "Well," demanded the senior part ner, "what of that. ' "Why, he hasn't asked for an in crease in salary-" "Heavens. We must have his ac counts examined."--Catholic Standard and Times. Best of All. R. J. Mayher, No. 406 South Clark St., Chicago, writes as follows: "I have kept and used your H nt's Lightning Oil for the last ten years in my family. It is the only kind to have pnd the best of all." cures Cuts, Burns, Bruises, Is, Aches, Pains, Stings and ter. It kills Chiggers, too. Through Struggle to Repose. Struggle and anguish have their phce in every genuine life, but they are the stages through which it ad vances to a strength which is full of repose.--Mabie. It Cures While You Walk. Allen's Foot-Ease is a certain cure for not, sweating, callous, and swollen, aching feet. Sold byall Druggists. Price 25c. Don't accept and- ubstitute. Trial package FRI*E. Address Allm S. Olmsted, Le Roy. N. Y. The fact that some men are self made is stamped en the wrapper. Mrs. Wnslow's Soothing Syrup. For children teething, softens the gums, reduces sto Sammation, siys pain, cures, wind coiu. Ii s bottle. When jealousy gets busy love takes a vacatio. PUTNAM FADELESS DYES Cor' l mee wds lhtersand fster color than anyotherdy. On. Oc achag colors an bers. Thoyr de old I c nd tbert tha an eher1 dye. Ye can dl oapmt..it uwutrioig airt. Writ lotre olrliue-uoteflo. miaob sld Coma. OIIROE DRUO 00., Om oiy, IIM.k.. Stupid Jeweler. "Yes, George-that is, Mr. Flckel proposed last night," said the truth ful Dora, "and we're engaged now; and rm the first girl he ever loved, too." "Indeed!" replied Miss Wise. "I tice your ring" . e gave me one, but be had to take it back to get it fixed. The stupid Jeweler made the inscription read, 'George to Genevieve,' instead of 'George to Dors.'-Philadelphia Press. Arai or Otmo. Cirr or Torso. ( ,. Luc.s CourT. " aRAN 'J. CuzI makes oath that be Is -eaor Partuer of the irm of F. J. CasrSr & Co., doing uslnees in the City of Toledo. County and Stare stores.id. cad that said rm will pay the sum of O.N HUNDRED DOLLARS for each and every case of CATATaS that cannot be cared by the use .o HAra CATABE Cuss. FRANK J. CHE.EY. wmrn to before me mad subscrlbedin my presence, thil ath day of December, A. D., 180. A N oTnaR Pusr o. fHals Catsrh Crem i taken internally and acts directly on the blood and mucous surfaces of the system. Send for testimonia.ls, free. a F J. . CHEKY CO., Toledo, O. Tae lla'sFamily Plls for onstpatiton. / Perseverance Essential. There is a certain point of pro ficiency at which an acquisition begins to be of use, and unless we have the time and resolution necessary to reach that point, our labor is as completely thrown away as that of a mechanic who began to make an engine but never finished iL-P. G. Hamertom. It's Fine. C.. Johnson, Louisville, Ky., writes: "I have used your Hunt's Cure and it is fna." We have many similar letters. Hunt's C(ure is a strictly guaranteed remedy fr any variety of skin dis eases. It stops Itching instantaneously. Modesty without merit Is awkward; and merit without modesty is insolent But modest merit has a double claim to acceptance, and meets with as many patrons as beholders.-Hughes. Capudind Cures Indigestion Pains, Sour stomeih and heartburn no matter fran what cause. Gives immediate relief. Prescribed by physicians because it is pose and efective. Trial bottle 10c. Regu la size and sOc at all drugsists. Jf a ma has enough push hell man air ,pw L lfUU U. II 9_ __ 7£)~rlI i ?· 0~'F~ mm~~~ir l "t$lrL~"" ~#tLDmek flbih'q~idh~ll~ -~V~C~~ Dr. Bitters Huckleberry Cordial I U tal ts " , a t ev ie. It 1sie fawr ibabetebbymedicine the be t iNS aald r doetrw Mohers e-rysw aheretick to d@vin. itaa ulrgtttbtebotbtoaUbettochIdrnfordCoue.Dye etr Dwda bets. Totacas dsad s Tt. mosdS seryo , but M ake DrI. mers k ,y rdi asd loms at drugsutrers, .oirE. a Tw aTE-AQUZ I N P IINTEa GCfasi · TOMAOU'ACS= IM T ftl IIIWOUTZ He Wanted Pie. William J. Ryan, president of the supreme council of public hackmen of New York, said the other day that the winter panic had reduced the hack -men's receipts considerably. "We'll have to come down to Eng .1sh ratee--12 ents a mile instead of 50 cents-if we have many more such panics," Mr. Ryan said. "Everybody felt the pinch. I overheard a tramp grumbling in a public square. "'The trade ain't like it used to be,' he said. 'Here ten times running to-day I've asked for a bit of bread, and what do they give me? Why, durn it, just a bit o' bread.' " GARFIELD Digestive Tablets. From your druggist, or the Garfield Tea Co., Brooklyn, N. Y. 25c per bottle. Once in a great while a woman actually believes that her husband knows as much as he thinks he knows. SlK HEADACHE ý Positively crestned i They also renieve Dtw i t tres from DyspepalIa i r digseionandToonearty SatVR sr A per.. t re. r edy for Dilzzies, N.. , ass, Browalnaas, B.4 atast satheml omtsCo ad Touena, Pain in the 81de, TORPID LIVUa. my r egulate the Bowels. Purely VegetLMs SMALL PILL. SALL BOSE. SMALL PRICE. Genuine Must Bear Fac.Simile Signature REFUSE SUBSTITUTES. Fame @ame for Rhe. Botanic Blood Balm (B. B. B.) cares theworst cases of Rheumatism. bone pains, swollen muscles and joints- by purifyin the blood. Thousands of cases cured by B. B. B. after all other treatments failed. Price st.oo per large bottle at drug stores, with complete directions for home treatment. L.arge sample free by writing Blood Balm Co.. Atlanta, Ga. yruppr fs lixir Senna acts gentlyyet prompt i onthe bowels, cleanses Te seystem eectually, assists one in overcomin$ habitual constipation ermanently. To get its bne icial efects by the enuine. anufactured bythe Ito SYRUP Co. SOD BYLfý NG DRUCGISTS-509 pe..80rm DAISY FLY TILLER ply'u aofim all files. Neat. elsen.ornamentsl. conoenlent.cheap. lasts all sea so.. Albolutely harmless. cannot spill . t'o over. --ll not s,.l or In jure any thln.p. uaranteed efec tive. Of aIll dealr.,. oraet prepaidfor 2 crrtls. HAKOLD S0U"IB% 1.1 liDsL Ave., oLs. Y. DEFIANCE STARCH _ " ..1. k Wlct A. N. Ks.-F (1908-19) 2229. TOILET ANTISEPTIC Keeps the breath, teeth, mouth and body antiseptically clean and free from un healthy germ-life and disagreeable odors, which water, soap and tooth preparations alone cannot do. A germicidal, disin fecting and deodor izing toilet requisite . . ... of exceptional ex cellence and econ omy. Invaluable for inflamed eyes, throat and nasal and uaterine oatarrb At drug and toilet stores, 50 cents, or by mail postpaid. Large Trial Sample WITH "HEALTH AND BEAUTY" SOOK SENT PRR5 THE PAXTON TOILET CO., Bosto, Mausi THE DUTCH .pYo PAINTER STANDS FOR PAINTQUALITY IT IS FOUND ONIY 0N PURE WHITE LEAD MADE BY THE PROCES. Great Closing Out Sale! Farm Wagons sold at less than manufactur ing cost. Address, or quire of OLDS WAGON WORKS FT. WAYNE, BDIANA BAB Y'S Favouritc Slin Soap Warm baths with Cuticura Soap followed, when neces sary, by gentle anointings with Cuticura, the great Skin Cure, preserve, purify - beautify t skinscap hair and ad of iifanfts. and. children, relieve ecze mas, rashes, itchings, irrita tions and chafings, permit rest and sleep and point to a speedy i~moval of torturing, disfiguring humours when all else faills. ',f '.., SCold th.w iN 10.r dtpo: Lsh..do. h3Tf w& (~- .~ I·~EM. 5. k. Pal. - " ser a ~-- ow Fw m il»o8. i ii .W 1sad 3 I, Mnrar2A,