Newspaper Page Text
TO THE CAOTOFS MOUTH, g
A Tale of the Sepoy Mutiny.
11V t. J. DEESTON.
OILED iu bis at
tempt to escape,
Major Arthur Fitz
ge r a 1 d-Lascelles
nut nenr to a corner
1 1 kSwS of t,,e l,,l,aeon n,m
llsfojrl watched the toran-
tulas, Dome" em-
id hairy legs, regarded mo
,or. Tlioir name was legion. Upon
:fv projecting nugle, from floor to
lug, hideous, fot, loathsome, tbey
; led patiently.
vlond by the Major, with chiu rest-
jnpon drawn-up knees, nat Color
jeani.Tohn Haltiwoll. Thin man
foo'evos for the tarantulas; his
,) was introspective. Strange rep
,'.J crawled over bis motionless foet,
, 1 be heeded them not. At times
, ' companion swore, loudly and
ly;'tbe Color-Hergeant littered
. -word. Occasionally tbo former
' bed and Htamped round the dis-
Apartment; the latter never raised
oe dungoou was subterraneous to
a ixteut of ten foot. High up on
ids of tbo room an opening re
bliDg a balistrarin admitted cross
of feeble light. The massive
I were mncid with damp and the
, uolesome air. At intervals the
( dure pwelled info bngo drops and
!) bed ppon the greeu floor. Somo
' one foil upon a spider and made
;f',hiorj but tbo tarantulas never
6 ed, only just waited, waited.
Alt au hour in this dungeon would
Ki eoed a savago dog. Yet into
in bad thrown bis hrotficr man.
iyhom did it belong? To the Rajah
irViitoor better known us Nana
of execrable memory.
tho vear oi. wliou the liamos oi
swept over India, every day
Major Laseelles grew sullen and fr
ritnble, though bo controlled bis feel
ings. Ho resumed bis limited walk,
with arms folded and face frown ins.
The Color-Sergeant continued to sit
motionless. Thus for an hour both
maintained an almost intolerable si
lence, until a key gratod harshly and
tbo door of the dungeon was flung
open, llulf a dozen Sepoys entered,
oud the two Englishmen were led
Tlnndreds of eyes followed their
egress. The tarantulas, it seemed,
were doomed to diFappointment.
Down a rlightot stone steps, through
subteraneau pnssago racking with
damp, up again into a drier atmos
phere, through more corridors torti
ous and innumerable, all forming part
of the (treat palace of tho wealthy lla
jah of lihitoor, were the prisoners led
by thei. dusky guard.
All Ibis abruptly terminated. Dark
ness gave- place to light, s,iinlor to
splendor, misery to magnificence.
They wero confronted by tho Rajah
himself in one of bis state apart
ments. The Vahratta prince stood sur
rounded by tho emblems of wealth
and- Eastern luxury. The heavy fra
grance of incense was in the nir, water
splashed iu marble basins, light en
tered through windows of delicately
tinted glass. One of these windows
was Hung open, and by it stood the
Rajah, attended by tbn e of his suite.
Upon a motion from him the two pris
oners, their arms securely held, were
The Rajah's eyes filled with an evil
lire as ho glared upon tho men who
had once esteemed themselves his
friends; for they, in company with
others, had not infrequently shared
his hospitulity. Tho nation which
taught with incidents dramatic,
' Bathetic, terrible. The follow
ing narration ot one such inci
itlio story of a fiend's thought,
rudL-ulimiu'H exultation, of the
If tho Tiger of Cuwuporo
fCliIor-Scrgeaut John llalliwell,
Pf or Ins kiud. loved bis lifo
1A ho was about to lose it: that
he oLF.Artr.n the oux with one scpr.nn noexn.
grave. He also loved amoved the direction of tho gosture.
The loss of the one implied
f the other; this mudo him
lesently ho looked towards
tuion, nnd seemed about to
i'uou, thinking better of it,
nee more lost iu meditation.
'U asked himself, should he
ii confession 'it Probably be
e harshly rebuked for bis
he would draw upon hiiu-
r$ fciUujor's wrath, aud all to uo
seeing that death lay
I flint little iron door.
such an hour a man yearus
,his hourt te bis fellow, l'os-
, bis companion might os
I though he might refuse the
f the living, yet the message
&'J id is sacred.
jf ," he began peril bad bred
n between the snneiior und
'ordiuate-.".Mujor, I have
Mi! to tell you."
ijor s knitted brows relaxed,
d in bis walk.
did not believe, sir, that I
;ht my last buttle, my seoret
ivo remained unrevealed. It
iHillo that one of us muy see
Uk'uin. If that one should
t-'lf, sir, will you deliver a
certainly, llalliwell. What
suge, sir, to your daughter
, whom heaven nreservo
luud Roue mud! I love her,
angry. I cannot help it.
i angel of my life."
iin.l it, sir! But I am angry,
1'igry, too! Uy jove, you
, tny friend."
1 not disturb you, sir. Life
'vo given her to mo I be-
uld have done; for, bad I
so miserably caught, I would
u promotion at this time,
or and glory lie within the
every brave nmu. And
with ull respect, my liuoage
comparison with yours. Rut
II, Dundoo rant's word is
liuti yours. Major. Only I
Jo.'!, sir, should you elude
lies of this most infamous
'is Nana Kahib, to tell Con
U one muu met his end un-
v, thinking of her bonny
lioaven reflected therein,"
"like John llalliwell, kuo v-
ig of the terror to come
now holds his name in deepest loath
ing once trusted Natia Huhih as au
ally, until thwarted ambition breed
ing successfully hatred, treachery and
revenge turned the prince into a
traitor, tbo man into a tiger.
His prisoners rogardo.l him with
proud indi.Terenoe. Ho smiled, and
pointed a bejewelod linger through
tho window. The men's eyes fol
Cawnpore lay stretched out before
hundreds of bamboo nnd mud huts
interspersed indiscriminately with
public buildings of a more substan
tial Ftruoture. The broad river ap
peared as a streak of silver; the
minarets flushed iu tho golden sun
light. "Down look down." It was tbo
Raiuh who spoke.
They obeyed, and this is wliut they
A long court of extreme narrow
ness, bounded on either side by edi
fices nppareutly consixting of the
quarters allotted to the priuce's re
tainers. At tho neur end of this
court, and almost against the palace
wall, a square, thick iron shield had
been eveoteil. At the opposite end,
Home uity to seventy yams distant, u
cannon stood mounted upon a stone
curriage. 1 lie polished steel gleamed
in me sumigut. ino piece was a
Major Laseelles shrugged his shoul
ders'. "Of cotirso, jou nee tho scoundrel's
game, llalliwell," he whispered. "It
seems we shall have to run a race
Ami his face grew white as death.
Softly though tbo words were ut
tered, tho Rajah's attentive ear did
not miss them.
"A race that is it," be said, bis
voice trembling with half suppressed
excitement. "A race foi life. Hoe, I
am merciful, If you leap the gnu be
fore the fuse burns to the touch-hole,
you shall dine with me to-night, and
go where you will with the sunrise.
You first; the other remuius to oil-serve."
At a glauce from tho Rajah's stern
eyas Major Laseelles was seized; but
the officer, by a powerful effort,
wronehod himself free, aud faced up
on his captors with a look rendered
more terrible by its despair than by
its anger. While they hesitated, the
Major turned to bis companion with
"llalliwell, you have my word. If
I esoape I will deliver your message
Clod bless my ifarliug girl." ,
llalliwell gripped the band offered
to him aud wrung it ferveutly.
"Thank you, Major. Heaven help
you. Good-bye. And run hard
Lardl Oue uever knows vou know "
The uet iustant tho Major had
In a few mimenti he appeared iu
the court and took bis station infrout
of tho iron shield, facing tho gnu.
Two Hcpoya held him by the arms,
awaitiug the signal. Hulliwell could
see it all clearly; the loading of tho
gun, the curefiil adjustment of the
"Ho will uever do it," groaned the
Color-Sergeaut irwardly. "He's ton
fat. He will be blown to shivers."
Suddenly the mau at the gnu raised
his hand and touched off the fuse. At
the same instant the Major was
pushed forward. He bounded with
great swiftness dowu tho passage, so
narrow that he had scarcely room to
swing his onus. In a tnco bo had
covered a quarter of the ground a
half three-quarters. Then llalliwell
cr.ed, "Merciful Powers!" for n hor
rible jet of red flame burst from tho
A man's body cannot check acbargi
of grape shot, so the missiles came
on, all bloody, and smashed into tho
iron shield. Major Laseelles had been
blown to pieces. Tho watchers at the
window heord the patter of a ghastly
rain upon tho stones.
llalliwell turned bis face to the
prince, to show him that a soldier can
look upon a soldier's death nnd not
flinch. The Nairn's dusky skin bud
puled a little. He took somo graphs
from a dish, and ate them slowly,,
Then he turned to ono of his retinue.
"The cursed I'cringhee has lost a
Tho man smiled and bowed without
"This ono is thin. Think you !i!
will run faster?"
"Your highness will have tho hot
ter sport, Duudoo Pant traced a pat
tern with his foot upon tho cloth of
silver. His brow grew sullen; he
seemed to autieipato the vengeanco of
a Havelock, Presently he said:
"Let him try."
llalliwell was led from the apart
ment. Ho paid no heed to the change I
scene, A face swam before bis eyes,
the face of a woman into whose heart
a great sorrow would shortly come, a
woman left fatherless. The vision
lent him strength, gave courage to hi
sinking heart and vigor to his limbs,
which privation and imprisonment
Then bo-ealized that he was facing
the grim muzzle of the cauuou. Never
runner toed the marj: iu so dreadful a
raeo. Ho saw the gunner attending
to his piece, watched him brush away
the priming, aud carefully loload.
His footings were indescribable. The
sunlight llashiug on the steel trun
nions dazled his eyes. He clenched
his hands, clenched his teeth.
"For lifo and love," he muttered,
"aud the rest with God."
Suddenly he received u violent push,
ami knew that tho fearful sprint had
Have you ever, in the grip of night
mare, run from one who follows fast?
You strive to fly, but your feet cling
to tho ground, and you only crawl.
Tho sensation is maddening. So it
was with John IUUiwell. The stone
flaars seemed glued to bis limbs; iu
reality he scarcely touched them ut
all. Every nerve, every muscle of
the man wore engaged in the fright
ful struggle. The guniur, who stood
by his piece, recoiled with amazement
from tbo face of tho Englishman, who,
rushing down upon him, cleared the
gun with one superb bound, even as
the leaden death roared out.
The Color-Sergeant waited not to
test the verity of tho Rajah's word,
aud tho invitation to dinner failed to
tempt him just then. He continued
his rapid course, through the maze ol
mud-huts and eocoa-puli'ns, over the
baked plain, aud finally pluuged ink
the river, whielyhore him, half-swim
miug, half-florfting upon its deep aud
even current.) Tho Nana never .saw
bis prisoner igaiu.
The Color-Sergeant bad won his life.
Two year (subsequently Lieutenant
C'jlonol John llalliwell won a prize
even more dear to him. rCassel's Maga-
Front iiikI ltM Ktirmtitloii.
A farmer's bulletin on the subject
of protection from frost has beeu pro
pared by E. R. Garriett, professor of
meteorology of the weather bureau, at
Washington. The bulletin defines
frost aud the conditions which favor
its formatiou. und gives the methods
of protection which have been found
practicable by experiments. It tells
when to expect frosts and describes
devices for preventing the rapid radi
ation of beat, for charging the air with
.moisture, ami for adding moisture to
the air, Somo facts regarding froey.es,
which are destructive alike to tender
vegetation and to plants of hardier
growth, are also given. The bulletin
says that iu the dry climate of the cit
rus fruit region of California and in
the promising fruit districts of Ari
zona small aud numerous fires, prefer
ably of coal burned iu iron baskets,
have been found to be the most elfec
tive device used for protection against
frost; Hecoud in point of utility may
be placed irrigation ; the practical pro
cess which affords the least protection
appears to be smudge fires. In tho
orange-growing districts of tho South
irrigation a fiords tho most effective
protection against frost, while iu re
gions where this process can not be
employed dump smudge fires, proper
ly bandied, uro best udapted to gen
C!.btuoitr of Jtuif tfiiicit Cm. 1
A largo baggage our will hold about
200 trunks, n 'small one about 150
trunks. At teriuiuul stations no bag
gage master in the car will have a
man to help him bundle the baggage
aud stack it as it comes iu. The bag
gage is piled, of oonrse, with a view
to its convenient distribution at tho
stations where it is to go. It is also
stacked so that the cheks and marks
cau be read easily, and it is piled iu
such a way that it will ride to the
best advantage and with the least like
lihood of damage; all the work of au
expert in the handling of baggage.
Ton of lliiraeahoe Koliiriioil Ono liy Oiid,
Four Rethehem boys, who stole
nearly a ton of horseshoes from
blacksmith, were compelled to curry
theiu back, one by oue, through the
main street of the town, and were
then forgiven. The lads traveled 27
miles apiece in returning the stolen
property, and were thou publicly
spanked by their pareuW. Phitadel
NEW YORK FASHIONS,
! Designs For Costumes That Have fie
como Popular in the Metropolis.
New York City (Special).--Fo out
door children's gnrmentft tho new
model 3 nliovr ii aoi.iewhut puzzling
variety. First of all, jackets of all
trains will be even longer
have ever before worn them.
rrcr.i.s.'iE roii fivu-vkaii-cpi.o dinr..
shapes and lengths, nnd pelisses cover
ing tho skirt, theti there are capes
which will be ns neb more worn thau
Tbeae e.ie made round with hut
IHtle trimming and reaching slightly
below the waistline. They uro fre
iiuently constructed with small pel
lei ines, one, two or even three, super
posed, and fastening at the foo of tbo
cciliar by loops ami buttons, so that
they can be lubied or ih.i ut will.
Tht y nr.! chielly made in cloth or
ScmI'.'Ii tweed, nu 1 many have plaid
pi llerinen, covering tUehlniublers only
nd forming the luiuming, or the
long cape itself is plaid und the rmuller
lu the ii'-oor-ipuiiying cut, repro
duced from ihe Pry Guods Economist,
is shown a eo:it-shuped pelisse for girl
Tim Nw .iHi'brt.
A very pretty new-shaped ,'acl.cl i
close fitting in the back and sides w ith
rather long basque rounded ot!
ubruptly and terminating .it the fide
darts. The front of the jacket iv
formed of a broad tab, tounden at its
lowest extremity, and, though shorfei
than the basques, still of considerable
length. It causes tho jacket to stand
off from the figure in front and never
thelof s imparts a graceful curve to the
form. Two small square levers hib
up on tho breast and a Medici lolla1'
at the buck only.
ThrIiIoh' Nfwnt Fnnrv. i
The young person w ho is fond of
being tailor made may now add t.i her
wardrobe a silk tailor-made gown. It !
is one of fashion's newest fancies. Tin,
silk tailored gown must be severely
plain. It is very effective if mad. by
an expert and trimuio.; with 'ir.n.'.i l
A llpaulirul 4 tiiilr1hii.
Many unique designs in jewelrj now
appear iu tho showcases and on :asl.
iouablo women. The newist h:.!e
luiueis small ami of heart shape. It
is a cirtde of pearls around a tiny
enamelled tlower with a diamond cen
tre. The flower should be the flower
of a girl's birthday month.
Tim lnir Cup llnlil (In Own.
The utility of a gulf cape as en n!l
round, ever-ready ga, rent is still in
disputable, aud in the latest curs
when made from the newest Scotdi
plaid two-faced materials they ur
surely attractive enough to ;le(se eveu
tho mo.-.t fastidious.
I'iiviirlli Willi Yimliit Winn, n.
An inordinate craze for novehioi
really seizes only very yoniitf wnien,
and it is with these, if with any, that
the bright Highland plaids now nec.i
in such great profusion will find much
favor for dress fabrics.
riHliI Arn H,l,tillilc.
l'iaids of the most pronounced type
can now truthfully be said to be epide
mic, so few vomeu are there who r.re
free from tho infection.
The initial purchase of the season
by every maid and matron, just filter
ing on the delightful task of collecting
fc ' va 7 ; 'i-AJ
of five years. Tho material is while
Hot!', Tho rovers of white velvet,
stitched, aro repeated ou the cull's and
pockets. Thru double rows of round
crystal buttons ornament tho front.
Tor young children, say from Uvo
to eight, jackets 'are mostly inad-j
Ioomo with straight bueks and fronts,
with turned-back revers and no collar.
Ilati in ':iiiJI4 rrtiltmon.
Hata for the neason now at its
height present a bewildering display.
They are weighted with fruits and ber
ries, leaves and blossoms which hnve
i ien turned by the miu nnd frost in
Ihe workroom:!. Straws the like of
which never have been seen iu a field
ure presented iu combinations sbich
require great courage to wear.
A toque of sevr ral shades of violet
velvet iu bauds, interlaced with a black
l'ara liso feather, I'asteued by a je led
rosette, is among tba recent styles, j
and is suitable for evening wear.
1 or visit ing t here lu a broad-briiuine 1
straw, lifted ut the sides underneath
by velvet bows and bauds. It has
three waving ostrich plumes, and
pendaut from tho buck are black mous-
selitie da soie strings, which are lied
under the chin a little to tho ride.
Most becoming to a young face is
another broad but iu green fancy
straw. Swuthed urouud its crown is
inoirsaeline, tho lightest shade of
green. Clusters of cherries und their
leaves fiuiHh tho combination. I
Brims are all wide in the new huts.
One, loaded with autumn flowers, with
loops of wired black velvet ribbon
wreathed o'er them, is a charming
erentiou, but this, too, is fastened by
Tho ever mrvicenble if not always
appropriate sailor is to bo found iu ull
norls and conditions among the new
millinery. Those which aro trimmed
with ribbon or wide velvet iu loopa at
tho back are tho only uoveltioa in ibis
limy FMAlilniiubla Knr Waililliic,
The most charmin;; materials foi
gowna to be worn at -bo weddings of
tho neason aro designed in gray orepo
do chiun garnished with grny peurl
embroidery, and with such n goyi n a
very llet-topped tnrbau of gray ilk,
wound with a scarf of peurl bed'.uvod
white chiffon, i:t the smart oud proper
thing. Ko uoto of color is thought
well of iu connection with those very
neutral hiivemliies. nnd for nil f tatelv
nlfair.s it is iatorestiu to lonru that I
an aultnniial wa-drobe, hss been at
least one of these wooliy-buckod, full
bunging wrap.'i, the hue oi whi'.'h, so
angry and brave, like the poet's vo.se,
bids tho rash gazer to wipe hi eye,
and lends not u whit of charm to the
One excuse to bo offered in extenua
tion of tho popularity ( these amaz
ingly toned wraps is tho undeniable
uovelly of their shapes and the indis
putable comfort to be found in some
of them. There pro snugly fitting,
double-full capes with largo useful
capped pockets applied to (he ontsido
surface of tho li'vt f-'.ll, hesid.s the
round short collet formed "golfer's
friend," which wears a deep e rcula'.'
flounce piped on the s!:ir-. i," the gar-
A I.TI1 l'LA.!l WUAI.
meut. One aud nil U Oj seem a'lan-'ed
to give the arms free play without ex
posing tho tent of tbo body to tile
. Tho Btyle Sultnlil. I 'or
Tail, slim women aro
by nature to carry or
GOOD ROADS NOTES.
"As the necessity for good roads
increases, more frequent attempts are
made by the country road bnilders to
I construct tdooe or macadam roads.
I Failures are especially numerous in
j respect to the methods adopted,"
j say Otto Dorner, Chairman of tho
: L. A. W. Highway Improvement Com
"We may expect that, iu time, the
construction of stone roads will be
come ns familiar to farmers as the
growing of wheat, but at present there
is very little goneral information ou
"Tho two points to bo observed iu
building stone roads are, first, to pro
vide a proper foundation, aud second,
to ioll md compact the stone metal
with the utmost thoroughness. To
begin with, tho subsoil, which is to
serve as a foundation for tho stono,
must be properly crownod, sloping
dowu from the middle to each vide of
the road, and must then be rolled uu
til it is absolutely bard and smooth.
Tho road should take its shape from
the shape of the foundation. Tho
stone is but a covering or roof for tho
protection of the ground beneath.
In order that this roof may bo solid,
it must rest upon something abso
lutely firm. A soft earth bottom can
not support a stono roadway intended
for ordinary heavy travel. Where tho
road is built upon low ground, the
foundation should bo drained as
"Tho stono used should bo put
dowu in layers not more than four
inches thick, and it is well, where
several layers of stone aro used, to
sort tho material and touso tho larger
pieces for tho lower layer. This
sorting is done by means of a rotary
screen attached to tho rock crusher,
In building macadam roads in Massa
chusetts and Ontario, the lower
layer is usually composed of stone
which will pasa through a bole two
and one-half inches in diameter. The
second layer usually consists of pieces
which will pass through u one aud
one-half inch hole.
"Rolling is the most important
point in the treatment of macadam or
stone roads. A heavy roller should
always be used, heavy enough to
wedge tho pieces of stone firmly to
getlier. The roller accomplishes this
by shifting the pieces about until each
is lodged firmly between adjoining
pieces, which readily explains tho
greater effectiveness of the heavy ma
chine. Two things may proveut suc
cessful rolling; cither the failure to
provide a solid foundation, or tho
practico. which is very comiuou, of
spreading gravel or dirt over a layer
of stone before it is rolled. Tho idea
of using such a 'binder' is a bad
mistake, lu cither event, the dirt or
gravel, getliug botween the loose
I particles of htone, will prevent thoir
' becoming firmly wedged. A mixing
i of stono and earth, which is thus fre
! quently brought ubont in uu attempt
' to build a macadam road, is little
! better than an ordinary dirt road; in
i deed, it is inferior in hoiuo partieu
; lars. Tho material iu a road thus
constructed is sure to shift about
I under the pressure of passing narrow
j tired wheels, which result iu the
i larger pieces of stono working thoir
' way to tho top, rendering the road
I rough- and uncomfortable for travel,
i Tho best way to help the stone to
i 'biud' is to thoroughly sprinkle it
1 with water before aud during tho
: rolling process. Almost every kiud
of stone has more or less cementing
I qualities, and its saturation with
' water while it is being rolled serves
j admirably to help unite the different
I pieces firmly. Tho second layer of
stone is frequently of less thickness
than the layer below. This layer
should also be thoroughly and re
peatedly rolled without the uso of
gravel or dirt as a supposed hinder,
and with the use of abundant water
to help in cementing it. After tho
layers of stono are entirely completed
aud have been thoroughly rolled
aud packed, it is well to spread
a layer of gravel, by the way of top
dressing, ami to roll that thoroughly.
IJettcr still is to make this layer of
stone screenings, which will unite
better than gravel docs. This dress
ing will prevent wearing the macadam
road proper, and,- as it disappears
with uso and travel, should bo re
newed from time to time, leaving tho
stone construction below absolutely
Ti Aiill-ltut Acllullidl.
Massachusetts roads aro costing ail
j the way from $11000 to $'.5,0U0 per
j All money npent ou repairing earth
: roads becomes each year a total loss
j without materially improving their
Whatever road material yon uso will
in timo neod carelul repairs ny men
skilled iu this work. The old adago
'A stiteh iu timo saves nine.' applies
Tho total cost of maintaining roads
iu good order ranges, ou account cd
varying conditions, between as wide
limits almost as the initial cost of con
struction. A plan of road building should be
adopted in every State, city and town,
and at least a portion of carried out
each year and the dilferont materials
should only bo used iu their proper
place, according to tho dilferent con
ditions that exist iu each aud every
Uirt roads are, ns a rule, tho most
expeusivo roads that can be used,
while on tho other band stoue roads,
if properly constructed of good mater
ial und kept in perfect condition, art)
tho most Hatisfaotory, tho cheapest,
und most economical roads that can be
Tho road that will best suit t'ua
needs of the farmer, iu the first place,
limit not bo too costly; aud, in the
second place, must bo of the very best
kind, for farmers should be able to do
thoir heavy hauling over them when
their fields are too wet to work and
their team would otherwise bo idle.
New Jersey is building more roads,'
and better roads for less money pen
mile than any other State iu tho
Uuion. Their rouds are now costing
from twenty to soventy. cents per
square yard. Where the telford con
struction is used they sometimes cost
as much as seveuty-ihree cents per
she cried, "do
"yon are yonr
THE HOPE'S OPINION.
Tn 11 n you wlil your lver nnil whl;
Jtiick your poor bruin In the conflict for
. I'linlnh your eyns f;i a elirlnrty znnl
I To :1! 'this cmitrlvHue. of yours wftfi ,1
Tit my turn nt lat. Wlwro the mcri luiv.i
I nlhhhi and doIi!i nr. il my bin. I le I
My lienrt Is o'erjuyeil and ruy nilrnl Is ;
llir' a lny tiny nt last. I'm tlm '-ar-rl!,'eles
PITH AND POINT.
Mrs. Smythe "I wonder why oM
china is so rare and valuable." Mrs.
Pe .foues ' Why, I thought yon kept
A.- "It is when . man is iu troubht
flint he knows the value of a wife."
11. "Yes: be cau put nil his property
iu her name.''
"Knuy umbrellas to mend, tuisler?'"
"Xono to mer.d and none to lend; the
last one was stolen yesterday." Ohio
"There goes one of these wnmen'H
fights reformers." "How do yon
know?" "Don't you pco his wife i.
carrying the baby?"
He win a Kn-nt coiii ocr.
Ami oiers Iim 1 ii I t write,
tint he couldn't fompowe his voiingnst
Wlieu Ue walked Mat round nt iihfht,
T..cna---"Fred must be in love witli
yon." F.dith "Why do you think
so?" Lena "He asked me if I didn't
thiuk you were pretty." Itostoit
"Ah, but Count,
you love me for
"Yes," ho replied,
fa.airo's only child."
Customer- "I want to buy a lint."
Hatter - "Yes, sir. Would you like a
high hat?" Customer-. "No; I want
something for about a dollar and u
"I ued to have beans to beat the
band," said the wedded coquette.
"And now, I suppose," responded her
hushnud "you think you've a husband
to beat the carpet ? Well, you're mis
taken." Cynthia "What positiou do ou
hold iu the engine works. Mr.
1'ricity?" Alex. Trieity "I just do
)dd jobs sewing on electric button
nd watering the steam-plant."
"At least," said the artist who was
engaged iu pniuting a portrait of tho
President of the I'nt Men's Club,
"this is ono picture the critics can't
accuse of luck of breadth and color."
The (iuide "Now you sit. right
here; don't move, aud watch for tho
leer through the opening." Amateur
Sportsman "When do you thiuk ho'll
In. along?" Tho (iuide "Oh, some
time this week." Harper's Bazar.
"My dear," said Mrs. Hunewell, ai
she poured the coffee ut breakfast tho
other morning, "do you 'believe iu
the eternal fitness of things?" "I
used to," replied Hunewell, "but that
was before you began to make my
shirts." Chicago News.
Ambitious Wife "You
champion football player
werent you'.' Meek
"Y-e-s, m'dear. Why?"
Wife "Oh, nothing, nothing. Only
that ten-u-week clerk is in the parlor
with our daughter again." Standard.
"Johnnie," auid the lather, sternly,
"your school teacher writes mo that
you do not behave yourself." "Yes
tir," ropliod thu boy, "She nays I'm
as bad as you were, pop." Where
upon the parent went upstairs to en
joy alone tho laugh over obi times.
Philadelphia North American.
"Now that you ure about to uiarrj"
remarked the fond mamma to her only
daughter, "it behooves me to speak
plainly. Vou have hud your own way
nil your life, but that must end."
"Why, mamma:" exclaimed the pros
pective bride; "tieorgo will let tun do
just us I please." "Jiother tleorge!"
retorted tho fond mamma: "I'm think
ing that you will have to have a cook.'-
Ttilil ul' llitlllid liuuitr.
Whar yer goiu'?"
When yer goiu'?"
(Join' now, stranger?"
"Ain't got no bout. How yo'.i goiu
"Jloat! Think er crick like thin
hero's goiu' ter stop nie? (ioiu' tei
ride across, stranger?''
Ho meant what, he Haid, for the
speaker was Puuiel Jiooue, aud he sal
his horse, gun iu hand, on thf
bl u lis where the custom hcuso now
stauds and gaed across that "oriek
tho mighty Mississippi, toward th
west, "whar be wnz goiu'."
This was further back than the
memory of the oldest inhabitant of
Memphis extends, hut tradition say
that it took ten men to hold Paniel to
keep bim from wading his horse aerosr
tho Mississippi. Memphis Kveuiug
Tlip M iki-t at llitlll:i.
Tho market in Halifax, N. S., al
ways draws many visitors. L'p and
down and across parts of a do.eu
streets men, women and children squat
upon the sidewalks or tend theii
stands from the rear of dilapidated
curt or other vehicles. Everything
thut grows iu that part of the country
is ottered for sale in tnese open mar
kets, especially wild produce, berries,
herbs and Mowers. llonie-madc
cheese, preserves and Ihe like are. sel
alongside of tho measure of potatoes,
a pair of ducks, a basket of clams, a
half lamb aud a bask"t of berries,
.'iireh bui and sweet rass are ulil
ied by the Indians, who stolidly iu
sist upon two prices for their guudj
baskets and toy caiii.es.
Mlitlitlr AlKfiil Mludrul.
"Does your husband ever help yon
ubont taking care of the baby?" wai
asked the wife of a young professor ii
a neighboring city.
"Not often, though sometimes hi
does, Last evening he said he'd taki
Willie for uu airing as he was goiug U
walk down to tho postofliee. Half ai
hour later 1 mw my husband sittiuf
on Ihe porch reading a i-cientitie maga
v.ine, but 1 could see nothing of tin
" ' Where's Willie? What liavo yoi
done vith him?" I asked.
"Why!" said the professor. "I for
got ull about bim; 1 think be is sit
ting in the postotliec," Detroit I'rai,