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SOUTHERN STANDARD-MCMINNVILLE. TENNESSEE-sa'I URDAV, DEC. 12,1891.
THE VALVE OV PRINTER'S INK.
Will tliu mcrcluiut who is wise
Ever cease td advertise '! ? '!
Some unknown writer answers partly
t lie aflirmative as follows:
When the trees grow upside down,
When the beggar wears u crown;
When iee forms upon the sun,
When the Hpnrrow weighs u ton;
When the women (secrets keep,
When gold dollars pet too cheap,
When iish forget to swim,
Woen boys are not called Jim;
When girls go back on gum,
When the small boy hates to drum;
When no politician schemes,
When mince pies make pleasant dreams;
When its fun to break a looth,
When all lawyers tell the truth;
When the young people cense, to wed,
When the human race is dead;
When the drummer has no brass,
When those things come to pass,
Then perhaps the man that's wise.
Will neglect to advertise.
I1Y A It A IS.
Up tin? broad street ru.slioil the
.uttiiijr November wind, sending
clouds of dust on before it, heralding
its Hjiroach, and warning the pe
destrian to turn his buck in time to
avoid the blinding drift.
In spite of cold and wind the
streets are well filled with shoppers,
people who have been to market to
provide for Thanksgiving Day, and
almost every one carries a turkey,
which is to grace the festive board on
The city folks come to the farmer
for the largest share of their feast day
dinner, and the farmer goes to the
city grocer for his dainties, such as
nuts, raisins, etc.
Eben Stubbs was staggering along
the market place under a load of
groceries which he knew would de
light tho hearts of the younger
Stubbses, and also" of his buxom
At last he reached his wagon,
which was drawn up against the
curb in a side street, and deposited
his weighty burden in the rear of it.
Then stretching his arms, he let
out a vociferous "Whew!" which
"Wall, now," he said to himself,
"if it don't beat all how Martha
know'd jist what to git to mek all
them children happy, and ef they
don't eat theyselfes sick it won't
be her fault. But I must be a gitten
home, he said, as he clambered up to
the front seat and took up the reins.
"Git ep," he cried to the old roan
mare. As happy as could be, he
drove along at a good gait, occasion
ally hurrying the mare along by a
loud "(Jit ep" or a touch of the
His home lay out on the Morgan
Pike, good ten miles from town, and,
as it was dusk when he started,
darkness overtook him belore he
had traversed one-half the distance,
lie lit his pipe aud had buttoned up
his coat and was about to give his
horse a fresh start when he heard a
noise behind him. Hastily turning
around he saw a little urchin just
arising from under a big comfort that
lay in the bed of the wagon.
"Hello! W'at yer doin' there?"
he cried as he reached back and
seized the young scamp.
"I ain't doin' nothin' mister!" the
little lad faltered. "I just clum inter
your waggin down town to take i
rest, and I felt so good and warm un
der the blanket that I jest went ter
sleep. Oh, what'l mother think
when I don't get home early," he
sobbed and then started to cry.
Touched by the poor little fellow's
story, the old farmer said: "Never
mind, my little man, you jest climb
up here with me, and if we don't
pass no waggin a goin' in, I'll tek
vbu on home and send . you ia on
my John's milk waggin' about mid
night." - '
Thus comforted, the ragged lad
climbed over onto the seat, and in so
doing his little bare feet were seen by
"What! Yer don't mean ter Say
yer ain't got no shoes on ? Here,
boy, wrap, your feet and legs up in
diet comfort and rut them 'neath
this b'ur skin."
Having thus made the boy more
comfortable. Stubbs murmun'd half
"Well, I swan, ef that don't beat
all. So cold thet the thermometer's
well niirh friz, and ain't trot no shoes
" i:t svor name, lad ."' lie con
"Willie Green," the boy answered
"Ain't yer pap got no better sense
than to let yer freeze ter death?"
"Father's dead, ami mother a in
4ot enough money to get me no
-hoes, so she always keeps me in the
hoine. Bat today 1 thought I'd
out and sen If I couldn't do some little
Job and get some money to buy
mother some coal and a turkey for to
morrow," the poor child explained,
liy this time the farm houso could
be seen in the distance, and as soon i
as Farmer Stubbs saw the light he
said: "There's my ranch."
Soon they drove in, and the whole
family, hearing the wheels on the
road, was out to see what father had
brought for the morrow. Jumping
down from the seat the old farmer
lifted the little fellow on" the wagon
and handed him over to his eldest
son, John, who was standing near
by, too surprised to speak.
"There, John, there's your Thanks
givin' gilt. Take the poor little fel
low in to.the fire, I reckon he's well
"Sukes alive, Eben Stubbs, what
you been a doin ? Whar did you get
the boy?" cried his amazed wife.
"Never you mind, wife, it's all
ight. I'll come and explain when I
put the horse away. Here you, Bill,
tek them things outon the waggin,
so as I kin unhitch."
Jlocciving no answer he turned to
s"; what had become ot Uill and saw
them all going into the house. In
the excitement over the new arrival
they had forgotten the father's
So he carried the things to the
house and drove off to the barn,
whence he soon returned. He told
them all the story of the little boy,
and when he turned to look closer at
the lad, he was startled by the like-
nets he bore to some one he had seen
"Wife," he said to Mrs. Stubbs,
who was busily picking over some
old clothes, from which she was go
ing to select a suit for the little waif,"
who does this boy look like?"
'Well, Eben, I noticed that, and I
can't recall to save me."
"Come here, Willie," she contin
ued, addressing the lad, "let me see if
one of Henry's old shirts won't fit
Stripping off the child's torn shirt,
she was about to try on the other
when she noticed a locket dangling
from a gold chain. "What's that,
my boy?" she inquired, looking at it
closely. ' '
"That's got a picture of grandpa
and mamma in it," he said, opening
it and showing it to her. Glancing
at the miniature photos she trembled
"Look here, Eben, if this ain't a
picture of your father and sister Kate,
what married Gilford Green, my
name ain't Martha Stubbs."
Sure enough, there it was, a pic
ture of Eben Stubbs' father and sister.
"Come here, lad, and tell me all
about your mamma. Where does
she live?" cried the overjoyed farmer
Hardly knowing what he was do-
in?, the frightened child told all he
could remember. He pathetically
told of his father's death, and the
poverty of himself and mother
since ills death, now ins motner
tried to locate her brother, and how,
wearied out, she gave up her search
after She had traced him from his
native home to the town in which
they now lived."
"Jest to think of it," cried the
farmer, "me a livin' only 10 miles
away from her, and havin' plenty,
while she "was sutTerin'. You, Bill,
harness up the black colt to the
spring waggin and bring him round
to the door. I'll have Kate and her
boy here to spend Thanksgiving and
as many more of 'em as they like.
That black colt never went over the
pike at such a rate of speed before.
The 10 miles were covered in a
short time, which seemed an eter
nity to the farmer.
He drove down across the town
and turned into a dark,harrov street,
and pulled up with a "whoa!" be
fore a dilapidated cottage. Knock
ing on the door and not waiting for
the hurried response he heard from
within, he pushed forward, and
soon brother and sister were once
more united after a long seperation.
Oh, what a Thanksgiving Day
was that! Their prayers of thanks
ascended with the greatest fervor to
the One who had caused this happy
Now Try This.
It will cost you nothing and
surely do you good, if you have a
Cough, Cold, or any trouble with
Throat. Chest or Lungs. Dr. King's
New Discovery for Consumption,
Coughs and Colds is guaranteed to
give relief, or money will be paid
back. SufFerer from La Grippe
found it just the thing and under its
use had it speedy ami perfect recov
ery. Try a sample bottle at our ex
pertise and learn for yourself just how
good a thing it is. Trial bottles
free 1 Uitehey A- Bostick's Drug
Store Large si.e .".oc and fl.OO. :i
OkkicbofS Cherry, "21 Drayton St.,)
Savannah, Ga., Due. la, ls-io. )
Muss us. LtlTMAN ltitos., Savannah, Ga.:
Dear Sirs-I would like to add my testi
mony to the almost miraculous effect of I
1 l in the ease of Mary Iiiiirnliam, a wo
man living on iny place; she hud a constant
cough, soie throat, debility, etc., and was
emaciated to a degree that she was unable
to get out of bed unaided, being given up
by physicians; she hail taken the ruinous so-
called Word Medicines without the least
effect, until being put under the 1'. P. l'
she immediately began to improve anil is
now in as good health as ever in her life
You can refer to me at any time as to the
effect of P. P. P. in the foregoing case.
For sale by all druggists.
P. P. P. A wonderful medicine; it gives un
appetite, it invigorates and
P. P. P. Cures rheumatism aud all pains
in side, back und shoulders.knees,
hips, wrists and joints.
P. P. P. Cures syphilis in all its various
stages, old ulcers, sores aud kid
P. P. P. Cures catarrh, eczema, erysipelas,
all skin diseases ail mercurial
P. P. P. Cures dyspepsia, ebronio female
complaints and broken down con
stitution nod loss of manhood.
P. P. P. The best blood purifier of the
u u'i'. lias made more permanent
cures tl.an other blood remedies.
A Brilliant Youth.
A tall, lean, candaverous-looking
individual moped into Henry Wat
terson s sanctum one day. He look
ed lost. There was a wild look in
his basilisk eyes as they nervously
noted the contents of the room, and
you could hear his heart go
thumpety-thump against hit coarse,
blue woolen shirt.
He had on a dirty shirt and a pair
of blue jeans trousers, that held well
aloft from his coarse brogans. You
might have taken him for a cowboy,
had he a more brusque manner and a
There was an infantile cough.
Mr. Watterson! wrote on. There
came another cough, a little louder.
Mr. Watterson looked up.
"Well, young man ?"
"Mr. Watterson," began the in
truaer, in a high, squeaky and un
certain voice. "1 am a journalist.
is there an opening on this paper
for a bright, brilliant young man like
me, excellent education, trenchant
"Yes, young man, there is," inter
rupted the great editor. . The bril
liant young man's heart bounded,
and he smiled sweetly as he moved
toward the speaker.
"Yes, young man, there is," con
tinued Mr. Watterson. "The car
penter, by wise forethought, when he
constructed this building, provided
such an 'opening' lor brilliant young
men like you." Then abruptly
"Turn the knob to the right, please."
The young man had found an
An old physician, retired from
practice, having had placed in his
hands by an East India missionary
the formula of a simple vegetable
remedy for the speedy and perma
nent cure of Consumption, Bronchitis.
Catarrh, Asthma and all thr at and
Lung Affections, also a positive and
radical cure for Nervous Debility and
all Nervous Complaints, after having
tested its wonderful curative powers
in thousands of cases, has felt it his
duty to make it known to his suffer
ing fellows. Actuated by this motive
and a desire to relieve human sutler
ing, I will send free of charge, to al
who desire it, this recipe, in German
French or English, with full direc
tions for preparing and using. Sent
by mail by addressing with stamp
naming this paper, w. A. inoyeh
820 Powers' Block, Rochester, N. Y
The Champion Cow.
Hoard's Dairyman says Pauline
Paul, the champion cow of the world
produced in one year 18,(5(59 pounds
of milk, from which was made 1,153
pounds 15J ounces of butter. This
was done on a ration not exceeding
3D pounds of grain a day, composed
of three parts bran, two parts ground
oats, one part corn meal, with three
pounds daily of cotton-seed meal part
of the time.
our yerTbest people
Lonhrm our statement when we say
that Dr. Acker's Englisii Remedy is
in every way sutierior to any and all
other preparations for the Throat and
Lungs. Jn Whooping Lough and
Croup, it is magic and relieves at
once. We offer you a sample bottle
free. Remember, Ibis Remedy is
sold on a positive guarantee. For
rale by Y II. Fleming. .'5
"on, mamma:" cried W illie, on
seeing n zebra for the first time, "do
come here and see this poor little con
"Who said Hood's Sarsaparilla?"
Thousands of people, who know it to
be the best Mood purifier and tonic
.1. W. Yates, Tullalriina, Ttiin.
writes: "It floes me roovl to praise
Botanic Blood Malm. It cured me
of an ab-H'ess on the ! i lis and a-th-
i ma that troubled me two years and
; that other remedies failed to benefit."
The Cause of Rheumatism.
An acid which exists in sour milk
and cider, called lactic-acid, is be
lieved by physicians to ho the cause
of rheumatism. Accumulating in
the blood, it attacks the fibrous tis
sues in the joints and causes agoniz
ing pains. What is needed is a rem-
dy to neutralize the acid, and to so
invigorate the kidneys and liver that
all waste will he carried off. Hood's
Sarsaparilla is heartily recommended
by many whom it has cured of rheu
matism. It possessed just the desired
qualities, and so thoroughly purifies
the blood as to prevent occurrence of
rheumatic attacks. We snireest a
rial of Hood's Sarsaparilla by all
sufferers from rheumatism.
A Pleasant Lemcn Drink.
For Biliousness, Constipation and
Malaria, take Lemon Elixir.
l or Indigestion, Sick and Nervous
Headache, take Lemon Elixir.
lor Sleeplessness, Nervousness.
and Heart Failure take Lemon
For Fevers, Chills and
take Lemon Elixir.
Latins, for natural and
organic regulation, take
Dr. Mozely's Lemon Elixir will
not fail you in any of the above nam
ed diseases, all of which arise from a
torpid or diseased liver, stomach,
kidnevs or bowels.
Prepared only by Dr. H. Mozley,
Atlanta, Ga. iilc, and $1 bottles at
LEMON HOT DHOPS.
Cures all Coughs, Colds, Hoarse
ness, Sore Throat, Bronchitis, Pneu
monia, Hemorrhage and all throat
and lung diseases.
An elegant and reliable prepara
25 cents at druggists. Prepared
only by Dr. II. Mozley, Atlanta, Ga.
"Why do you suppose Royal Wor
cester ware is marked with four Ws?"
asked one china connoisteur of anoth
er. "I s'pose," remarked a 10-year-old
nephew who had overheard, "the
man that marked it stuttered."
The best cure for rheumatism or
neuralgia is salvation Oil, used ac
cording to directions. Price 25 cents
The news from the seat of war is
constanly contradictory; but not so
from ur. liulrs Uough Syrup; every
report concerning it proves it to be
the best Cough Syrup known. Only
'2o cts. a bottle.
If fails, money refunded ; Preston's
A N ELEPHANT CANT CLIMB ATREC,
J- A WHALE. CANNOT. UVS N
A COOK CANNOT COOK QUITS WEB
IF- THE'RANGS'HASTWO , tsfri
IT YOU WANT THE BEST
Buy the CHARTER OAK,
With the Wire Gauze Oven Door.
IT JS NOT AN EXPERIMENT,
TAKE NO OTHER.
For sale bvMcMinnyille Hardware Co.
' . " i, pESPECTLr WELL. ' '
I Fiu.MOHC, Dimro.cn Oo , I.. Sept I9ti. .
Miss K. Kiv.nigau writes : My nioiber uuil
e'lter used l'nstur Koentg'i Nerve Tonlo for
neuralgia. Thcysre both perfectly well now
Bud never tired praising the Tonic. " ';
SEVEltAL CASES CTUED.
Prrrsii'Rn, r., Mny, 1W9.
The well-known Kev. Pastor A. J. Z , who
Will icadily pive his name on request, write
us: An orphan under my caro Buffered from
epilepsy for four yearn, which had advanced
very far, but three buttles of Pustor Koeulfi's
Nerve, Tonic cured him entirely.
Another boy suffered from cramps to such
a deirree, that he beenme violent at tiroes and
endangered hie own life. Treatment In several
hospitals by competent physicians pave only
temporary relief, but after using several
bottles o Pastor Koonig'a Norvo Tonic be
wan cured entirely, und has been, wtll n4
licttilhv ever slue. w
Valuable Kikm mi Nervous
DisciiHCH MMit tree to any addreHN
aim poor imiit iitH can airocoiain
Oil ineli lne (roe of charge.
This remedy has beon prepared by tho Rever
end PastorKocniu.otl'ort Wayne, lud.. since 1S.,
und Is now prepared under his direction by the
KOENIC MED. CO., Chicago, III.
Sold by I)ruKlts at 1 per llottle. 6 for
I.arseSizc, !... G ItotUes for 89.
relief nud is nn intiillililo
urc for Piles. PnifJI. iiy
free. AddnWA VI K i-MV
ijox t'llii, New VuiH uty.
5SWlftS OAVZE DOORt
0 P p
t A Household Remedy i
BLOOD and SKINS
Botanic Bleed Balm
It rir SCROFULA. ULCERS, SALT
I L- VU I Co RHEUM. EC7FMA ...r.
I or m ot malignant SKIN ERUPTION, be-
iuct uuiny cmtaciuus in inning up ino A
ostein and restoring the constitution,
when Impaired from any cause. Its V
almost supernatural healing properties d
justify us In guaranteeing a cure, It A
directions art followed.
OLD I rritt "Buuk or Wundcrs " f
BLOOD BALM CO.. Atlanta. Ga. 4
nil Tumors CI'TlEre no knif!
bonk f rer. DrallKATKiNT Nohkih
No. Its Kim street, Cincinnati, l-
'NESS h HEAD NOISES CURCDby
1'eika lNVlMULfci TUBULAJ EAR
riKUlAMC. WhUnflrn luaril. Com.
.11 li...l.r.ll M.1i1h 9. HISCOY.
lilt. i UrMwl. K.wlork. VtrlUfor biNk at praub VHSK.
' 'V: ?i liT'rV'' Clean and boiutllict tho t.
'' rVal tr' Promotes a luxurinnt prowtll.
' MitX--'--- JO-1 Never Fails to Kcstoro Gray
t'k "-; V' : - Hair to its Youthful lor.
i:SV-4iw Cures "ralp iii-s-s & hair ...Unit
lyfyV A V fiii-,iindl.iiilst IrnrslH. V
lne Pur k ' (mo-i Tonic. It rtiri'n the uoix itit'h.
v cat i.un, jM'fHinv, innigt-Kion, rain, lane uuiine.au cu.
H1NDERCORNS. The on1Trirpcurf fnrromi.
biupi all putt. Ijq, at Ifiuisti, or
, ur 111SCOX ft CO., K Y.
"liy n thorough 1:!iov1c(Il'l ot the natural
laws which govern the operations of diges
tion and nutrition, and by u careful appli
cation of the fine properties of well-selected
Cocoa, Mr. Kpps ling provided our break
fust tables with r delicately llavoured bever
age which may save us ninny heavy doctor's
bills, it is by the judicious use of such ar
ticles of diet that a constitution may b?.
gradually built above until strong enough
to resist every ten Jency to disease. Hun
dreds of subtle maladies are floating around
us ready to attuck wherever there is a weak
point. We may escape many a fatal shaft
by keeping ourselves well fortified with
pure blood and a properly nourished
name." Civil Srrvtce Gazettt, Made simply
with rjoi'inp water or milk. Sold only in
half-pound tins, by Urocers, labelled thus:
J ill EN LI'IVS A CO., Homeu'pathic,
Chemists, London, England.
Agents' profits per month. A V ill
prove it or pny lorteir. jcw
Portrait just out. A $f0 sam
ple sent free to all. V. 11. Clii
dester tt Son, 28 Hond St.. N. W
A A A A A A A
A A SYSTEM MAKING STOCK AND
(RAIN Speculation practically an In
vestment. Profits larjHi and almost certain;
loss improbable. Explanatory letter mailed
by ndtlressiiiK THE MUTUAL SYNDI
CATE, (i Wall St.. New York.
Or SI.I.F-PKESEIIVATION. Anew and only
( f,: Mcd.il I'llIZB ESSAY onNKKVOUS and
itIVSICAIi lICHIiaTY, KKKORS of
atrril.EXTTAUfSTKD VITALITY, PRE-
, ' vrtuti: Dix'i.iNE, and all diseases
r.nil WEAKNESSES of MAN. 800 pages, cloth,
-iit; 1 invnluable prescriptions. Only $1.00
I mail, double sealed. Descriptive Prospect
ii with endorsements sn rf" I crun
f Hie Press nnd voluntary hKh r I aim.i
.I.Ttimonials of tho cured. I NUWi
CotiBiiltntlon In person or by mail. Expert treat
ment. INVIOLABLE SECKECY and CEK
.'AIV WEE. Adtfm., Dr. V. n. 1'nrker. ot
Vuo I'cabody Medical Institute, No. 4 Bulfluch St.,
Uoi ton, Mass.
The Peabody Medical Instltuto has many lml
tutors, but no equal. -"Herald. 4
Tbu Science of Life, or Belf Preservation, la
t-' asurn mora viilnniilo than pold. Head It now,
cverv WEAK and NEItVOUS man, and learn to
be .yrKO.NO . Medical Jteview. (Copyrighted J
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A pamphlet Of Information andab-
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Sx3ttl llroitdway, (