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JOSEPH A. KELLY, EDITOR A5D rROPKIETOK.
11'CON.NELSYILLE, OHIO :
Friday, Feb. 25, 1STO.
TO OUR SUBSCRIBERS.
SUBSCRIBERS.
As the paid-up subscription of quite
a number of our subscribers expires -bout
this time of the year", we ahall
mark the margin of all delinquent pa
peri with the X" this week. As there
are some on our list who hare been is
arrears for some time, and hare not
paid any attention to our request that
tnej" should call and settle ; and as we
occasionally receive a request from
trach parties that their paper be stopp
ed without the arrearages being settled,
we publish the following United States
8upreme Court decisions for their ben
fit, in the hope that they will see there
by that the only legal method of stopp
ing a paper is to first settle their in
debtedness for the same :
1. Any person who takes a paper reg
ularly from the post office- whether
directed to his nam or another', or
whether he has subscribed or not is
responsible lor the payment.
2. If a person orders his paper dis
continued, he must pay all arrearage,'
or the publisher may continue to send
it until payment is made, and collect
the whole amount, whether the paper
is taken from the office or not.
, The courts have decided that refus
ing to take newspapers and periodic
als from the post office, or removing
and leaving them uncalled for, is pri
ma fade evidence of istektiosalfracd.
I Peters' Report of Decisions in the
Supreme Court of the United States.
Enlarging our paper has increased
the expense of publishing it ; and, as
we have to pay cash for everything we
get, we hope those who have been be
hind hand with us will see the necess
ity of their calling at our office the first
time they are in town. We know that
it is sheer negligence with many, that
they ever get behind-hand with their
County paper. They think the pay
ment of their mite but a small matter,
and that they can pay it most any time,
and thus put it off from time to time.
All such should remember that a pub
lisher's income is made up of these
imall sums, and that when a large
number of persons do as they do, the
publisher is kett out of a large sum of
money.
We hope to see the faces of many of
our friends within the next two weeks.
Pyle's Attempt to Smooth Over
the Defeat of Andrew Kahler
for School Director.
Two weeks ago the Conservative
contained an article on the election
of School Directors, held on the Sat
urday preceding our day of issue.
It chronicled the defeat of Andrew
Kahler and Enoch Dye, candidates
for re-election, and reflected upon
the unscrupulous means resorted to
by those individuals to come off the
victors. The Herald, of that week,
was very mute on the subject con,
tenting itself, although it was hard
up for a local, with merely mention
ing the election of Robt. A. Pinker
ton and David Mummey, and did
not refer to the overwhelming do
feat of Kahler and Dye. Jiast week,
Loweverr Mr. Pyle set himself to
work to conjure up an article that
would let theso defeated gentlemen
down as easily as possible, and also
destroy the effect of our article of
tbe preceding week. He starts out
by saying, our article "abounds in
scurrility and misstatements," and
then does not deny tb,e truth of any
one material charge we made. He
does not deny tbe fact that Kahler
had his name printed and written
on tickets in connection with each
of the other candidates, and had
them circulated ; nor doe9 he deny
that Dye attempted to influence vo
ters by telling them Pinkerton did
not support the war, and did vote
for Vallandigham.
He 6ays, however :
"What we 6aid m our issue be
fore tbe election, was said for
tbe purpose of etirring up a lively
interest in the matter, believing it
essential that our citizens should be
awakened to its importance, lest ir
responsible and incapable men
should be elected."
How we did not assert that Mr.
Pyle's article in his issue just pre
ceding the election was for any oth
er purpose than what he clains.
We admit that his design was good,
and we will agree with him that
the people acted upon his sugges
tions ; and did rally to the polls for
the purpose of preventing the elec
tion of "irresponsible and incapable
men."
He farther states :
When the Conservative b&jb that
the declination of Mr. Kahler, was
s mere trick, and a wire-pulling op
eration, it simply falsifies, as what
we said in relation to the election
was penned with the fall understan
ding that neither Mr. Dye or Mr.
Kahler would be candidates."
We ask if it follows, as a matter
ofcourse, that we falsify when we
charge that Kahler's declination
wasv a mere trick, because it icas Mr.
Isle's understanding that neither Mr.
Dye or Jfr. KaMtr vcould le candi
dates xchen he, Pyle, penned his arti
cle preceding the election t It strikes
us that it does not ! A great many
jMopI believed that Mr.? Kahler
would not have the hardihood to be
a candidate for re-election -when
Pylo pennod his article; and they
were deceived ; and it is altogether
probable that Mr. Pjle was deceiv
ed, also. We have no hesitation in
saying that Kahler never abandon
ed the idea of being a candidate ;
the full understanding of Pyle to
the contrary notwithstanding.
He farther says :
"Mr. Kahler, we know, haJ posi
tively and emphatically bxfusid to
have his name again used in this
connection, and he was instrument
a! in spreading that information,
well knowing that a large number
of his friends desired him to fill the
office another term,"
We admitted in onr article, of two
weeks ago, that Kahler bad given
out that bo would not- be a candi
date. This is one of the tricks that
men frequently resort to when they
want a nomination. Pyle rany have
believed Kahler sine-ore in refasiug;
but, if he did, he was a "victim of
misplaoed confidence." The idea of
Kahler's "knowing that a largs
number of his friends desired him
to fill the office another term," is
rather laughable under the circum
stances. From the paltry number
of votes received on that eventful
Saturday, February 3tb, we should
judge his "iriends" not to bo very
numerous in this locality. We be
lieve he got 43 votes out of 174!
and when it is reckoned that fully
one-half of those that voted for him
are marriage or blood relations, his
friends, it occurs to us, scetn to be
few and far between.
Woaroofthe opinion that Mr.
Pyle's charges of falsifying and
scnrnlity, which he makes against
us, but does not support by any ev
idence, will, like chickens, return
home to roost. So, also, will his
charge that the "opposition move
ment" was a "copperhead trick,"
when it is remembered that David
iiunimey, a life-loDg ISepublican.
was a candidate and elected on the
"opposition t:cket." His attempt
to make it appear that Dye did not
say thai he was sorry that his ni.me
was printed ou tho 6arae ticket with
Kahler's, is unavailing, as there are
plenty of people :n this village,
whose reputations for truth and ve
racity aro unimpeachable, who
heard the expression fall from his
lips.
Political.
THAT CLEVELAND DOG
GRANT WOULDN'T ACCEPT.
The dog, sent from Cleveland to
General Grant, by express, by a
political friend, who, it is supposed,
wanted the Cleveland Postoffice,
but upon which, he, silly knave,
neglected to pay the express charg
es, which caused Grant to refuse
the proffered kindness, has passed
into historic song. A song writer
in Louisville, Ky., has embalmed
the "Purp" in song, and an enter
prising music dealer, in the same
city, has set it to music, and pro
duced it under the title: "Shoo
Fly Purp, Don't Bodder Me." The
title page represents a disconsolate
and mangy cur, with drooping
tail, sorrowfully creeping away
from the White.house, which looms
up in the distance. Here are the
touching words of the song:
Ho! sergeant; kick that nasty purp
from off the Wuite-house door,
No Spanish dog from Ohio shall
trod upon my floor;
I've got a fifteenth in the house, a
woolly dog at that
No strait hair cropp'd cur foreign
purp off me 6hall o'er get fat.
Shoo" purp, 6hoo purp, Buckeye purp,
don't bodder me!
Of all tho purpa I dread the most,
a French, or one from Spain
They snarl and whine, off me they
dine, and often cause me pain.
That Alabama rebel dorg, once did
commit a breach
He tore my seat of gov'ment pants..
and loudly mado me screech.
Shoo fly! etc.
I've dogs enough around me now,
Curly, black and tan,
No Buckeye purp of Spanish blood,
Can mix with Wbitehouse clan.
So, no more purps sent by express,
Shall to the White-house reach,
My bull-face Butler is in his pen,
A whining over his speech.
The Dilemma of the Radicals
Which Horn will Radicalism
Radicalism Choose
The New York Herald, in an ar
ticle on the so-called Reconstruction
measures of Congress, says that
"Southern States were required to
ratify the Fifteenth Amendment as
a condition of reconstruction to tho
Union. As they could not be trus
ted to come in and thea ratify it,
they ratified first and then come in.
They were, therefore, not in the U
nion when they acted on tbe Con
stitution, or else they acted on the
Constitution, or else they never
was out of the Union. Either, then,
all the reconstruction laws of Con
gress are invalid, or these Southern
ratifications to tbe Fifteenth Am
endment are invalid. If the States
were in the Union there vas no
need to admit them, and if they
were not in the Union they could
not participate in making laws for
the States that were in." Which
horn o.this dilemma will Radical
ism chooBd ?
SUMNER AND REVELS.
Revels, the colored United States
Senator from Mississippi, as is nat
ural that be should, being a stran
ger and the first of his race in a
new position, seeks to hang to the
coat-tail of some Senator who has
the reputation and standing to
make him feel at easo in tbe new
society bo is about entering. He
seems to have fixed upon Sumner as
one to be depended on ; but accor
ding to the following Washington
special to the New York Commer
cial Advertiser, a .Republican sheet,
Sumner is not so willing a subject
as Revels might desire under the
circumstances. Says tho Advertis
er's correspondent :
'A most extraordinary phenoc
non met my gate this morning,
while standing upon the steps cf
the Capitol. It bad the form and
carriage of a human being, and, I
was forced to acknowledge that
some of us are indeed fearfally atid
wonderfully made. It wore cream
colored pants, tightly strapped over
glittering patent-leather boots,
which, so far as size went, might
have been intended for the Cardiff
Giant. A buff waiitcoat, adorned
with green glass buttons, pink sat
in scarf, whoso folds disclosed an
emerald of colossal proportions. An
English cut-away coat of a brown
hue, the side pockets of which were
hidden beneath Jiuge laps, added
not a little to the grotesqucness of
this apparition, while a bran lvew
beaver, set jauntily: jipon one side
of its head, a tasseled bamboo car
ried negligently beneath tho left
arm, and a whito cambric hand
kerchief, with an enormous red
border, conspicuously displayed in
close propinquity to the pink satin
scarf, completed the external dec
orations of the phenomenon. It
approached mo with an air of rest
less curiosity, and asked :
" 'Please, sab, has Mr. Charles
Sumner passcu in yet?'
"Not having 6een the Massachu
setts Magnus Apollo that morning,
I signified that so far as my per
sonal knowledge went Mr. Charles
Sumner had not passed in.'
" 'If you ploase, sah, should you
see him, be kind enough to say that
Mr. Revels -vf ill hang on for him
awhile in the lobby. Very impor
tant business, sah, and wish partic
ularly to see him.' Saying which,
with 'a few rapid strides, it disap
peared. He had not been gone two
minutes when 1 beheld Che majes
tic figure of 'Chawlcs' cautiously
approaching, as if momentarily ex
pecting to see some one whom he
would avoid. Ho stopped behind
ouo of tbe pillars of the portico and
peeped warily out, evidently bent
on recon noitering the ground.
Perceiving that the coast was clear,
he advanced and taking my hand
with much agitation, said :
"'Have you 6een Mr. Revels?'
"I informed him that I had.
" 'Thank Heaven, then, I've, es
caped him for once 1
" 'Fy no means,' said 1. 4 He is
at this moment 'hanging on" for
you in the lobby.'
"'Immaculate Casarf but the
fellow's a gigantic bore. I love- the
negro. It is a great, a glorious, a
gorgeous thing to love the negro,
but- eternally dang my Senatorial
coppers if I like to have one hang
ing to my coal-tail wherover I go!'
"I do not remember ever before
to have seen this great man injauch
a fit of passionate mortification."
a
The War on White Men
Know-Nothingism to be Renewed.
Know-Nothingism to be Renewed. Renewed.
The Radical policy has always
had two aims: to make citizens of
negroes, and to take away and ob
struct the citizenship of white n:tn
The latter is the aim of the disfran
chisement and the exclusion of the
South ; and all the machinery of
test oaths and pardons works to this
end. A new bill, just reported by
the Judiciary Committee, begins a
new proscription of the European
white man. The Philadelphia Age
says it violates tbe pledged faith of
the Government by rendering null
and inoperative the declarations of
intention hitherto made under the
lawa of the United States. Now
declarations will havo to bo made
to count from the date. The pro
ceeding is protracted, and confined
entirely to tho Federal Courts,
which are few and far between, and
this alone will bo a serious obstruc
tion to naturalization by the ex
pense and trouble attendant on go
ing to tho Court with the witnesses
whose testimony is required. The
bill is a piece of political villainy to
which the Democratic press and
Democratic members will da full
justice. "That it will pass both
Houses of Congress wo should
think incredible.it we had not seen
so many acts passed by the Radical
majority in defiance of justice and
decency.
The Harttord Times says that
Sumner complimented Mrs. Senator
Revels on tbe good fortune of her
husband, when that lady replied :
"Thank you, sah ! dough de Lord
affiick you wtd a whito skm, be gib
you a heart as black as anybody's."
tT Nothing of material impor
tance bas transpired in tho Ohio
Legislature the paet week
DANIEL WEBSTER ON LEGAL
TENDERS.
In a speech delivered by Daniel
Webster, in the United States Sen
ate, ou tho 2lst of December, 1836,
that great expounder of the Consti
tution denied the possibility of ma
king anything but gold and 6ilver
a legal tender, or substituting anv
other standard of value. The fol
lowing paragraph from tfre speech
states the point forcibly :
"But what is meant by tho 'Con -stituuonal
currency,' abeut which
so much is said ? What specie or
forms of currency does the Consti
tution allow, and what does it lor
bid. It is plain enough that this
depends on what we understand by
currency. Currency, in a large, and
perhaps a just sense, includes not
only gold and silver and bank notes,
but bills of exchango also. It may
include all that adjusts exchanges
and settles balances in the opera
tions of trade and business. But if
wo understand by currency the lo
gal money of tho country, and that
which constitutes a lawful tender
for debt, and is the statute meas
ure of value, then, undoubtedly, no
thing is included but gold and silv
er. Most unquestionably there is
uo legal tender, and thero can be
no legal tender, in this country, un
der the authority of this govern
ment, or any other, but gold and
silver, either the coinage of our own
mints or foreign coins, at 'ates reg
ulated by Congress. This is a con
stitutional principle, perfectly plain,
and of the very highest importance.
The States aro expressly prohibited
from making anythingbut goldand
silver a legal tender in payment of
debts; and although no such ex
preps prohibition is applied to Con
gress, yet, as Congress has no pow.
er granted it, in this respect, but to
com money and regulate the value
of foreign coins, it clearly has no
power to substitute paper, or any
thing else, for coin, as a tender in
payments of debts and in discharge
of contracts. Cougrees has exer
cised this power fully in both its
branches. It has coined money,
and still coins it ; it has regulated
tho value of foreign coins, and still
regulates their value. The legal
lender, the Constitutional standard
or value, is established, and cannot
overthrown. To overthrow it
would fchake tho whole system.
But if tho Constitution knows only
gold and silver as a legal tender,
docs it follow that the Constitution
cannot tolerate the voluntary circu
lation of banK notes, convertablein
to gold and silvcr-at tho will of the
holder, as part of tho actual money
of the country. Ia a man not only
to be entitled to demand goldand
silver for every debt, but is ho, or
should he be obliged to demand it
in all cases ? Is it, or should Gov
ernment make it unlawful to re
ceive pa' in anything elso? Such
notion s too absurd to be serious
ly treated. The Constitutional ten
der is tho thing to bo preserved, and
it ought to be preserved sacredly,
under all circumstanced. The rest
rernairs for judicious legislation by
those who have competent authority."
THE SOLDIERS BACK PAY.
We observe that Mr. Ball, of Mus
kingum county, in response to the
suggestions which have appeared
from soldiers in tho Enquirer, has
introduced a resolution in the Ohio
House of Reprctentatives instruct
ing our members of Congress to
support a bill which shall pay over
to the volunteers who enlisted uns
der tho gold contract at thiitcen
dollars a month, beforo the passage
of the legal tender act, the differ
ence between that sum and the am
ount they were compelled to take
in legal tenders. That is in accor
dance with the spirit of the decis
ion which has been made by the
Supreme Court of tho United States.
By the bye, we have several times
asked our amiable neighbors of the
Gazette and the Commercial wheth
er they were in favorof making it
right with tho soldiers in this way.
We know they are for paying the
five-twenty bondholders gold, when
we only agreed to give them legal
tenders, but aro they for paying tho
soldiers gold, according to the con
tract, or do they believe in the re
pudiation of tbe agreement thro
the legal tender clause? Let us bear
from you ? Cin. Enq.
Mr. Greeley In Trouble.
Don Piatt writes this reminisc
ence of the inauguration ball :
'Descending the 6tairs, I encount
ered Mr. Horace Greeley. He was
silting on a step, and looked as dis
mal as Manns amid the rums of
Carthage. "What is the matter,
Mr. Greeley ?" I iuquired. "I have
lost my hat in that cursed room of
idiots !" "Not your old white hat?"
"Yes, my old white hat, and with it
my overcoat. It is lamentable that
the rebels did not take this town,
and burn it to ashes. They showed
their tpite by not doing so. It is
an infernal sink bole of corruption,
depending for its miserable exist
ence on tho Government."
Congress is investigating
the alleged sale of Cadetships by its
members forth Annapolis Naval
SobooL
The mulatto member of tbe State
Senate of Virginia, from Goochland
County, in some recent remarks
illustrated the deplorably demoral
ized condition of his portion of the
Old Dominion, by saying that
'when he left home for .Richmond,
be had felt it necessary to bring all
bis stock here with him," property
was so insecuro from the license
prevailing through tbe country
among bad men of both colors. All
that was because tbe best men o
the county were forbidden by the
reconstruction laws to vote or hold
office.
A PxNNeTLVAXiA Radical
undertakes to avow that Wright,
the negro who has been appointed
a judge in the Sup. Court of South
Carolina, "is eminent for his integ
rity.". Perhaps so, but the poultry
in tho neighborhood nf his residence
probably know enough of the
peculiarities of his race to "roost
high" when the fable Rhadamant
Hrs is around. Cin. Enq.
Select Miscellany.
Burying Fort Strategy of a
Russian General.
In 1696, a large Russian army be
seiged the Turlish fort of Azof, which
was 6ituated on a plain, strongly forti
fied, and had a small, but well decip
lincd garrison. No common approach
es could be made to it, and the Turk
ish cannon swept the level with iron
hail. In this case the engineering skill
of the Russians was baffled, but Gener
al Patrick Gordon, the right hand man
of Peter the Great, and the only one
for whose death it is said he ever shed
a tear, being determined to take the
place at any cost, proposed to bury it
with earth by gradual approaches. He
had a large army. 1 he soil of the plain
was light and deep, and he set twelve
thousand men to work with spades,
throwing up a high circumvention of
earih, and advancing nearer and near
er every day to the place, by throwing
up the huge earth wall before them in
advance. The men were kept in gangs
and working day and night, the earth
being thrown from one to another,
like eteps of & stairs, the top gang tak
ing the lower place every half hour in
succession. In five weeks the huge
wall was carried forward nearly a mile,
until it rose to and above the highest
ramparts, and the earth began to roll
over them This caused the Turkish
Governor to hang out the white flag
and give in. flad he not done so,
General Gordon would have butied the
fort.
Mining Under the Sea.
There is a vast copper mine in Eng
land, where shafts extend many hun
dred yards under the sea. The moan
ing of the waves. as they dash against
the rock is forever sounding in those
gloomy aisles. When the storms come,
the sound of the waters becomes so
terrific that even the boldest miners
cannot stay below, but leave their work
and come out upon the earth.
Overhead are masses of bright copper
streaming through the gallery in all di
rections, traversed by a network of
thin red veins of iron, and over all the
salt water drips down from the tiny
crevices in the rock. Immense wealth
of metal is contained in these roofs,
but no miner dares give it another
stroke withhis pickaxe.
Already there has been one day's
work too much upon it, as a huge
wedge of wood driven into the rock
bears witness. The wedge is all that
keeps back tbe sea from bursting in
upon them. Yet there are three tiers
of galleries where men work day by
day, not knowing but at some fatal
hour the flood may be upon them, ren
dering all escape as hopeless as it was
in the days of Noah. The awe strick
en visitor hurries away from the scene
with a heart appalled in view of the
hourly dangers.
Let any man pass an evening in va
cant idleness, or even in reading some
silly tale, and compare the state of his
mind when he goes to sleep or gets up
next morning, with its state some oth
er day, when he has spent a few hours
in going through the proofs by facts
and reasoning, of some great doctrines
in natural science, of learning truths
wholly new to him, and satisfying him
self by careful examination, of the
grounds on which known truths rest
so as to be not only acquainted with
the doctrines themselves, but able to
show why he believes them and to
prove before others that they are true;
will find as great a difference as can
exist in the same being the difference
between looking back upon time un
profi tally wasted, and time spent in
self improvement ; he will feel himself
in one case listless and dissatisfied in
the other comfortable and happy ; in
the one case if he did not appear to
himself humble, at least will not have
earned any claim to his own self-respect
; in the other case he will enjoy
the proud consciousness of having, by
bis own exertions, become a wi3er and
therefore a more exalted nature.
Brougham.
Returning from divine services
in Cnicago, one Sunday, good little
Billy 's ideas of propriety had
been shocked by the wonderful at
tire of some female friends, who
displayed uncommonly low-necked
dres'ies, that moved him to say unto
his maternal parent :
"It's poor business for folks to go
to church just to show their
clothes."
"Why,my son, we must not judge
thoBO little girls; we cannot see
their hearts.'
"Can't so their beaits 1" ex
claimed Billy; "well I should think
you might their dresses were low
enough, I'm inre !"
The Chief Feminine Vice
Rev. Rowland Conner, the icde.
pendent Universalist preacher of
Boston, brings forward rather an
extraordinary argument for giving
the ballot to women. It seems to
be a favor&te one with him, for he
stopped at the Cleveland conven
tion, last fall, while on a bridal
tour, to announce that the women
were great liars, and now he re
peats it in milder language before
the Massachusetts woman suffrage
convention, at Boston, declaring
that the distinguishing weaknesses
of the subjugated sex were, evasion,
artifice, and deceit. This falseness
of character and of manner he at
tributed cntiicly to their long-time
oppression by men. Lying and
cheating, he argues, are the natural
resort and natural protect!on of
weakness against strength ; of those
who are oppressed against their op
pressors. The only way to reform
tho women and lift themout of theso
sweet little vices is to put them on
a full equality with men, to give
them equal rights under the laws,
in society, and in the government.
Probably there is something in this;
but it requires considerable audaci
ty to state it so boldly as Mr. Con
ncr does.
A Dutchman's Advertisement
A German in our town, says one
of our exchanges, who had not paid
much attention to learning En
lish, had a horse stolen from his
barn the other night ; whereupon
ho advertised as follows :
"Von nite, de oder day, ven I was
bin awake in my aleep, I hear
something vat I links vas notynst
right in my barn, an Iyustcut
bhumps (o bed and runs mil de barn
out ; and ven I vos Jere coom, I
seez dat my big gray, iron mare, he
vas bin tide loose and runmitde
stable off ; an' ever whoo vil him
bac bring, 1 yust so much pay birn
as vat bin kushtomary."
What She Died Of.
A mother, who had with her a lit.
t!e daughter, was examining tbe fig
ure of a borse on a tombstone, and
wondering what on earth it was an
emblem of. Thero was nothing to
explain it in the inscription. "Mam
ma," said the little one, as they
moved away, "1 shouldn't wonder
if she died of the nightmare."
Franklin Outdone
nro wrote :
"He who by the plow would thrive.
Himself must either hold or drive."
Theso lines were very popular in
their day, and even now they are
occasionally quoted by old fogies.
But BOTito person has eclipsed thero
by bringing out the following :
"He who by his biz would rise.
Must either bust or advertise."
Cheating Death
ing the prevalence of an epidemic,
was in constant dread of a call from
the grim messenger. A wag hear,
ing him at his prayers one night,
spoke to him the sepulchral voice
through a knot-hole
"Gumbo !"
"Whodar T said the affrighted
darkey.
"Death I"
"What ho want f
"Want Gumbo !"
Blowing out his candle with u
whow : "No such nigger heah !
Dal nitrger been dead for dis two
weeks. '
lO Tbo New York Express says
that tbe Rev. Horaco Cooke, of
eiopemont notoriety with a Miss
Johnson, is with his wife and boy
near Boston, under medical treat
ment and seeking rest. His mind
is still disordered. After disappear
ing from the city ho roamed about,
a friend constantly keeping with
him, and went to Chicago, among
other places. While there he sent
seventy-five dollars of borrowed
money, aud wrote to his wife that
he felt liko plunging into a wilder,
ness, never to be seen by a human
face again. Immediately after writ
ing he started for home, being very
warmly received by his wife. His
whereabouts will not be made pub
lic, in order to avoid further notor
iety. Ho needs re&t and quiet and
nobody will be admitted to see
him.
A Tbot hotel-keeper boarded a cler
ical looking gentleman two weeks, on
the strength of his piety and a copy of
the Ten Commandments which he car
ried pasted on his valise. The other
day the brother left to call another
minister, but he has not returned yet.
The valise has been broken open and
found to contain a fine assortment of
oat straw.
mm "
A humorous old man fell in with
an ignorant and rather impertinent
young convert who proceoded to in
form tho old gentleman, in very
positive terms, that he never could
reach heaven unless he was born
again, and added: 'I have exper
ienced that change, and I feel no
anxiety.
And have you been born again,'
said bis companion musingly.
'Yes, I trust I have.'
Well, said the old gentleman
eyeing him attentively, 'I don,t
think it would hurt you to be born
onco more!'
A Western philologist bas dis
covered that tho name of Omaha
was derived from a very frequent
Western exclamation with which
that region was familiar in the In
dian scalping days, namoly, ' Oh
my bar,"
D.H.MORTtEY&CO'SCOtUMN.
ft
D. H. MORTLEY & CO'S.,
CASH PRICE LIST OF GROCERIES!!
t.CORRECTCDWCCHIiY'l
)!
IP V
TENTHOUSAND DOLLARS WORTH
OF
GROCERIES
TO BE SOLD!
REGARDLESS OF EVERYTHING,
EXCEPT
THE SIONEY.
LOOK AT THE PRICES.
COFFEE.
Best Rio Coffee, 4 pounds for $1 00
rrime Rio Coffee, 4 1-2 lbs. for $1 00
Good RioCoffeee,51bs for $100
Government Java, per pound, 20
SUGAR.
8 lbs. Good N. Oi leans Sugar for $1 00
7 lbs. Choice N. Orleans Sugar for $1 00
6 lbs. Eest White N. O. Sugar for $1 00
6 lbs. Crushed Sugar for tl 00
6 lbs. Pulverized "White Sugar for l CO
guAllothr kinds in proportion.
TEAS.
Tst Tonne Uvson. ro1d all over
the country for $2 pr lb. $1 60
Extra Young Hyson,
Good Young Hyon,
Cest BlacV Tea,
fl 40
$1 20
1 00
Fine Quality of Syrup, per gal, tl 00
Vf Orlea.ni Molasses Der sal.. 80
Sorghum Jluhuses, per gal., M
SUNDRIES.
Carbon Oil per gal., 40
rure English Soda, 12 lbs. for tl 00
Sifted Tepper IGrainJ per lb, 40
Cod Fish per lb , 10
Best quality of Brooms each, 30
Five two-pound can Tomatoes, 1 00
Four two-pound can Teaches, 1 CO
Ten lbs. Carolina Rice for 1 00
Harris' Sugar Cured Dried Beef,
per lb., - 23
One dozen of No." 1 XXX Flint
Gbvss Chimneys for vu
English Currants, 5 lbe. for 1 00
Cranberries per quart, 10
14 bars Star Soap for 1 00
20 bars Rosin Soap for 1 CO
ALL GOODS SOLD ARB
WARRANTED ! !
Or the money reiunaeu.
tCash paid for Butter, Eggs, and ll
kinds of Produce Everybo
dy is invited to call.
POSITIVELY NO GOODS SOLD
On Credit!
DON'T FORGET THE PLACE,
D. H. M OUTLET & CO.,
CENTER STREET,
McCONNELSYILLE, O-
Fb:3,1370-tf.
$10,0
MOLASSES
a
,
MISCELLANEOUS.
MORGAN COUNTY
News Agency
FREE GIFT
ENTERPRIZE!
FIFTY THOUSAND DOLLLARS
lit TALIABLE PRIZES!
NO BLAMT1CKETS.
tFACII TICKET DRAWS A
PHIZE 1TORTII MORE
TII4XT1IE MOSEY
PAID FOR IT.
NO JEWELRY PHIZES.
One cash prize of S500 In Cold.
One casta prize of S50O In Sil
ver.
One casta prize ot $500 in
greenbacks.
One casta prize of $300 la
greenbacks.
One casta prize of $20O in
greenbacks.
One casta prize of $100 in
greenbacks.
Twenty casta prizes of $30
each in greenbacks.
One hundred prizes of $10
each In greenbacks.
Five hundred cash prizes ran
glng from $1 np to S50O.
One Ulandj's Portable Steam
Saw Mills, 25 Home Power,
With all the Modern Improv-
ments.
Worth S,TOO!
Whole Xo. of Prizes,
25,627!
Talned at -
50,000!
Tickets Limited to25,000
The drawing of tbe Morgan Co Kews A-
gency ana free uut Enterprise wm taso
place t McConneltTille, O., on Saturday,
March 26, 1870, oru soon thereafter a the
tickets are all sold. The plan of the Enter
prize iio arranged that those who patron
ize it cannot possibly loose anything. Each
ticket holder will stand a fair end an equal
ehauce to obtain the higher prizes, aud,
whether fortunate in this respect or not,
will secure a first class $2 newspaper atrlub
rates, so that the ticket or chance to draw
valuable prize in reality costs nothing.
By purchasing such large numbers of news
papers, I get them at a rate sufficiently low
to enable me to supply them to my pi irons
at ordinary club rate after paying the a
boe prizes and allowing for the necessary
expense of the Fnterj rize. Thus it will be
seen that newspapers can be procured thro
this Agency as cheap as they can he had at
the oCice of publication (except in rasea
where rery large rlubs are sent in) while
the ticket which each subscriber receives is
absolutely a FREE GIFT. The prizes will
be forwarded at my risk and expense with
in ten Ways after the drawing. The news
paper will be ."jrwarded direct from the
office of publication within one week after
the order ia received. Tickets will be for
warded immediately on receipt of order.
The drawing will take place in public and
will be superintended by a committee cho
sen by the ticket holders on tbe day of tha
drawing. The following is a list o'f names
and price of paprrs that will be turnihed t
S. Y. Tribune & 1 ticket, $1,60
CIu. Gazette &. 1 ticket, $1,50
The Crisis & 1 ticket, $1,?2
Ohio Farmer & Cin. Gaz
ette & 2 tickets, $3,75
Zanm. Courier ticket, $1,75
St. ClalrsvUle Gazette Jbl
ticket. $1.50
O. S. Journal & 1 ticket, $1.50.
MConnelsvIlle Herald &.
1 ticket, - $2.50
The Conservative &.1 tic
ket, - - - - $2,0C
The JToble Co. Republi
can & l ticket, - -$'2,00
I furnish no circulars, but if there is any
thing connected with this Enterprise thht
is not understood, it will be explained eith
er personally or by letter.
iloDey to come at my risk by matl must
be in the shape of post office money orders,
dra:t or cfteck, payable to my order or ia
registered letters. Don't send money bj the
express Companies, unless ou prepay their
charges. Addre all orders to
JOIIN BIRCH,
tn23.1870 2m ATConnglsTille.O.
INTERELT.N3 TOHOUSEXEEPERS
The subscriber Curs to the citizens of
M'CONNELSVILLE
AND YICIXITY,
A rare chance to avail themselvesef thaua t
paralleled benelits of
VAN SICKLE'S
GREATLY I.UPROTED ANT
CELEBRATED
FEATHER.
DRESSING
AND
Renovating Machine.
PATENTED JTXE 11th, 1S6T.
The most successful Feather Dresser ever
offered to the public, and we venture the
prediction that it never will be excelled, for
it proves to be exactly wbat all conditions
and qualities of Feathers need to render
them light, clean and healthy. Tbe clean
sing is done entirely by steam. Xo fire
comes near the feathers, consequently go
possibility of burning, scorchiug,r other
wise iniurinr them, which is an objection
able feature in hot air and fire dressing ma
chines. By this process all maths are des
troyed and removed, the Feathers cleans
ed, the fibres relieved from their matted
positions, giving to a bed an astomsning
increase in bulk, often more tbau one half ;
also removing all disagreeable scent, whicli
is so very common to new as well as old
feathers in fact giving, tho appearance
and essential qualitiea of new Feathers, and
relieving them irom an nauunjr ,u uiuiun,
bv the removal of the gummy orglutinoua
matter from the quill. In all places where
this machine has been introduced, I have,
been presented with testimonials of the
most approved character, from ladies and
gentlemen of the first respectability, ex
pressive of their entire confidence in this
method of renovating Feathers, not only on
account of the present beauty and increas
ed comfort they afford, but a!o on account
of the confident belief ther entertain of th
durability of the work. .Many of these per
sons spetk from positive knowledge, hav
ing had beds dressed by steaia more thaa
twenty years ago, and tnev con.nrr ie
pense trifling compared with the benefitade
rived Ticks of beds dressed, will be wash
ed if desired, for 50 cents. One bed only
dressed at a time, consequently there will
be no mixing of Feathers. Give mo
your best or poorest, old or new, provided
they are Gees or Duck Feathers, nd Iiotll
warrant satisfaction or no charge t
STATE AND COUSTY RIGHTS
FOR SALE !
$3F This celebrated machine is now io
operation in the west end id C. Burckholt
r'e building.
. C. O. HOWARD,
McConnelavllle, Ohio.
Dee ST, 1S69-2-.M
