Newspaper Page Text
Springfield Globe -Republic
TI1K Sl'UirGFIKLI GLOBE,
Vol xi in o "V. Number HO.
SPKTNGFIELD, OHIO, SATUKDAT EVENING, MARCH 28, 1885.
JTHE SPRINGPtELD REPUHUC
I Volume IXXI. Number 84.
Washington, March 2S. Tennessee and
Obio, slicbily coldtr weatber, 1 cal ra ns, fol
lowed by fair weatber, noitherly winds.
To suit the times prices must naturally
fall. They've fell and we've gathered thf m
in. They're here just aoout as soon as they
appear in the eastern markets.
Think ot buvicg fine Lislethrcad Half
Hose at 40c, and a belter one at 50c. Hand
some Balbripgans 25c, 40c, 50c Solid
Blacks, at 35c, and some more, none less.
We are surprised oursilves. Imagine 10c
ocks going for a nick'e, a quarter tor 15c,
aome 3 pairs for a quarter, 2 purs for a
quarter and s on.
Jfeckwear, a litils out of gear with the
market, 25c, "oceans of them" marked down
from 75c, 50c and 40c. If you htppen to be
easy to please, it's easy to save. This cut is
fttah, it'a the time to buy to-night till ten.
Working Shirts for a quarter, regular
' Old Hickory," and others, some Cheviots,
Laced Froats and others with Buttons, 40c,
60c and 75c Exclusive sale of the solid
Indigo Blue open back shirts, 75c
Flannel Shirts, new to-day. $1 for an all
wool Blue, others at $1.25, $1.50 and $1.75,
and every cue as good as the word. Un.
lanndried Shirts at 50c, no better than a
month ago, no better for a month to come.
Rainy weather Rubber Garments. The
Man's Coat, the Youth's Coat, the Boy's
Coat, the Serges, the Check Back, the
Slazy Gossamer, all are here, below as nsuaL
There's something in the make. We see to
that. Theres something in the
You're the judge.
Great Hat stock and-daily growing.
Sixteen dozrn Youth's and Men's Stiff
Hats placed on sale te-day at $1 each, others
here and more coming. You can't run,
jimp and guess anything about them. Go
alow and look long.
What about Bjy's Shirt Waists ? Beauti
ful is the word for the 12 dozen which ar-
rived yesterday. "Waist" no time in finding
headquarters on these goods.
Watch for our window (honing, the very
first warm day that come.
We've a hundred of the worst suite you
ever saw, now on the way from the factory.
Walt till they arrive and hear the price. It'll
be right out loud.
I Boy'a long stocking stock is receiving new
auditions. Beside full regular goods, we've a
case coming at a dime a pair; no trash,
Separate Pants are all the rage, more here
perhaps than elsewhere, on account of price.
It'f needless to mention we make them,
prices indicate how they come in our posies-
Sprinjj Overcoat'. ot like business to
j pay $15, $18, or thereabouts for an Overcoat,
( when our way makes the purchase so much
. easier. The fine all Wool Brown for $10, the
I Gray Mixed for $11, or the Youth's tor $9,
are not one whit better than we sold last eea
t on at $15. A look and a jerk, a try and a
chink and yonr'e dressed like a prince.
, Till 10 o'clock to-night.
These renowned pianos are kept In all styles at
lh Arcade Xian and Organ House. Fome
newatjJes just arriving tor spring trade.
Write for Pricas and Catalogue.
We Have Some Rare
is oecond-Band Pianos. We must mate room for
oar vpria? stock that has commenced to arrive.
God reliable agents wanted to sell our entire
.In of Pianos and orpins in every city and town in
Southern Ohio. Addrf
R. F. BRAND0M & CO.,
triitL. Sheen & Siapkiaion
1G8 Kare Sr.,
?9M -- Ti
Reall's Rebellion in the Northwest
He Has 15,000 Men.
War Feeling in Mexico Against
War Excitement la Canada.
Toroxto, March 28. The excitement here
continues unabated. From an early hour this
morning approaches to the drill shed were
crowded with people, waiting in expectation
of seeing the departure of our troops. The
Royal Grenadiers mustered at 8 o'clock, and,
notwithstanding the early hour and the fart
that the sergeants could not find tine last
eight to notify, all members ol their com
panies, tbey turned out 300 strong. Alter they
were dismissed the "Queen's Own" mustered
and showed the creditable turnout of 543.
There is the wildest excitament amongst theaa
and many who had left the regiment when
tbey heard that Colonel Otter was to take
command begged to be enrolled. Both regi
ments art now in the drill ihed
anxiously waiting orders whei to
start. The selection of 250 men from
each regiment will not be made until definite
orders hare arrived. The Mayor intimated
that the city will look after the wires and
families ol any married men who go to the
The garrison at Carleton is 300 strong
with civiliaas, so that there are 370 Ben
within striking distance of Rial and 300
volunteers, with two Armstrong guns sev
en days' travel away. In addition to this force
the Government has ordered the immediate
dispatch of 800 Eastern troops to the spot.
This brigade will consist ot 100 men from
each of the batteries of the Dominion artil
lery, 250 men from each of two Toronto
corps, "Queen's Own" and gren
adiers, and eighty men from the
School of Gunnery, under command of
Colonel Otter. Major General Middleton,
now on his was from Winnepeg to Oaapptle,
will take chief command ot the whole body
of troaps. The men from Ontario
will go by the Lake Superior route,
but it will be necessary to transport
thm by sleighs over a gap of seventy miles
ot unfnishtd road. What Rial may do,
pending the arrival ot the troops, remains to
be seen. His first move, now that he has
openly takea the field, will doubtless
be to secure supplies by plun
dering the Government of Hudson Bay
and other store houses, if he can, and to incite
the Indiana to join him in resistance to the
Queen's authority. Much depends upon the
Indians. It they remain true, short work
will be made of the half breeds,
bat should any considerable number of
them go over to Rial, and there are
about 16,000 of them in the whole Saskat
chewan country, the action of Canada be
laken in earnest. There is good ground,
however, for sayirg that up to he present
moment none of the bands, except per
haps Beardy'a, has shown any signs ot de
fection. Oiman Diana's Force.
Londos, March 28. A deserter from Os
man Digna's army states that be has 20,000
men entrenched at Tamma.
A Bebelllon In the Nortbweit.
Tohonto, Oct., March 28. The Mail, Gov
ernment organ, in an article on the North
west troubles says: Yesterday's encounter is
no doubt the beginning of a serious cam
paign. Riell is reported to have 15,000 ad
herents, armed with Remington rifles, ob
tiined from American traders, with six
American field gun?. Greater danger, bow
ever, is to be feared from the Indians. It is
evident that Beardy's band, who are
all Piegras, must have sided with
the rebels against Manner, Crosier, and
herald disaffection spread in Battleford, E I
monlon district, the task of stamping it out
will be formidable. Our Government bat
uken vigorous measures to meet the emerg
ency. The Winnepeg battalion of militia,
300 strong, with half a battery of artillery is
now on its way to Onappele station, 323 miles
west ot Wianepeg, where several trains run
north to the scene of insurrection, Carleton
being 25 miles from Onappele. The police
force at Bdtllefoid and Prince Albert num
War Feeling; In Mexico.
St. Louis, March 28. A dispatch from the
City of Mexico, eayi: Over twenty Mexi
can military officers, net in active service have
gone to Central America to join the forces
of San Salvador and Kicarauga agtinst
Guatemala. The war feeling is rapidly
extending and growing stronger. A large
public meetiag was held Thursday night, at
which every speaker advocated determined
and aggressive action towards Gua'emala.
An intense feeling of hatred toward Barrios
was manifested at the meeting, frequently in
terrupted by cries: "Dawn with Barrios I"
"Death to Barrios I ' It is repotted that the
Government is not averse to public agitation
Providence, R. I, March 28. A prize
fight came oil in Rehoboth, Mass, this morn
ing, in which Jack Ashton and James Dolan,
both of this city, fought eleven rounds to a
draw. Both were horribly battered. Blood
covered the floor ot the barn in which the
fight occurred, and at the finish both men
were exhausted by loss of blood. Their faces
were raw and their bodies terribly battered.
Neither of the men would give ia. The fight
was s'opped by the spectators for tear of fatal
Honq Koxo, March 28. The Chamber of
Commerce here urges that an English cable be
laid to Hong Kong and Singapore, and supply
torpedo-boats b: provided both ports.
Paris, Match 28. The municipal authori
ties of Paris voted $100,000 lor the relief of
the wounded French soldiers in Tonqnin.
Columbus, March 27. Hocsa. House met
at 8 o'clock and adjourned until 4 o'clock
Tuesday afternoon without transacting any
business whatever. Mr. McBride has the fol
lowing preamble and resolution drawn up lot
presentation next week:
Whereat, Allen O. Myers, a member of this
House from Franklin county, during a sitting
of the committee of the whole, by disorderly
conduct broke up the session of said commit
tee; and whereas, he also, upon former occa
sions upon the floor of this House was guilty
of conduct unbecoming a gentleman and a
member by repeatedly insulting this House
and its members while in session; therefore,
Resolved, by the Hou.e of Representatives,
That the said Allen O. Myers has, by bis con
duct, forleited his right as a member of this
House and he is hereby expelled.
Scnatx. The Senate met at 9 o'clock pur
suant to recess.
Mr. Elliott introduced a bill to increase the
salary of the Saperintendent ot the Soldiers
and Sailors Orphans' Home from $1,000 to
The committee on sanitary laws and regu
lations reported up an Mr. Haley's House bill
providing for the preservation of health of
female employes employed in manufacturing,
mechanical and mercantile establishments
and recommended its passage. The bill was
placed on Wednesday's calendar.
The judiciary committee reported back Mr.
Levering'a joint resolution providing for the
submission of a constitutional amendment
making the term of township trustees three
years, instead of one, with the recommenda
tion that it be adopted. The resolution was
placed on Wednesday's calendar.
On recommendation ot the committee on
sanitary laws and regulations, Mr. Williams's
Senate bill requiring physicians and druggists
to write all prescriptions in Englisb, was in
The Senate adjourned till 4 p. m. Tuesday.
London, March 28. According to the
latest information the victory for Oxford was
more decisive than at frsl reported. The
Oxford men won the race by three lengths
instead of two. The time af the race was
twenty-one minutes and thirty-six seconds,
a trifling improvement over the time a year
ago, when the record was tweaty-one minutes
and thitty-nine seconds. The improvement
was not as great as was anticipated, in view
ol finer weather and smoother water.
Suffering; tha South.
Chibustoh, S. C, March 28. Information
received from the suffering district says the
people are in a bad condition on the verge
at starvation. The people are asking tor
bread and the animals are starving. In many
places strong men are digging tor an ear of
corn to keep soul and body together. The
people held out well, trying to keep the suf
fering from getting abroad, but the time
has come when hunger pinches them.
Niw YatE, March 28. The weekly bank
statement shows the following changes: De
crease, $49,000; specie increase, $26,000;
legal tenders, increase, $159,000; deposits,
decrease, $39,000; circulation, decrease, $77,
OtO; reserve, increase, $4H8,00O. The banks
now hold $48,491,000 in. excess of legal re
quirement. Il.aplUU Destroyed.
Flint, Mich, March 28. A file at 3 a'clock
this morning completely destroyed the Flint
hospital, owned by Pierson & Cathoncr. TLe
contents were a total loss. Thirteen inmates
of the building were rescued with several nar
row escapes. Loss, $25,000; insurance,
$8,000. Cans nnknown.
The Ohio State Journal, ot the 28tb, has
this about the O'Mvers outbreak in the House:
"Thursday's outbreak In the House of Rep
resentatives was the prevailing topic of con
versation all over the city yesterday. All
sorts of rnmots concerning Franklin county's
legislative crank were flying about the streets
Thursday night and yesterday. One of the
most absurd of these was a report that he bad
committed suicide. There was, of course, no
truth ia this. Mr. Myers expressed three or
four intentions as to bis fature course. One
s:heme which it is held he at one time pro
posed to carry out, was to resign from the
Legislature and write a book about the Payne
Peadleton senatorial fight, revealing the in
side deals in that disgraceful affair, as he
claims to know all about them. He changed his
mind about this, however, and halt an hour
after the solemnly announced intention ol
pursuing this course he was claiming that he
wauld do something else. It is extremely prob
able that a sufficient number of the members of
the House are so afraid of him that no action
commensurate with the gravity of his offense
will be taken. He will put in the next two
or three days in working the sympathy racket
on individual members, and seek to persuade
them by the sweet and suave arts of speech,
in which he ia an adept, not to do anything
J with him this time, but to let it go and he'll
uo ueiicr iu iuiuic. iiui was iuc wajr kuiu
alter calling Dr. Lisle a horse thief, and is the
course he has pursued on numerous occasions
in the past. It is said Myers claims to have the
power to cut the thread by which, according
to bis statement, a Damoclean sword bangs
suspended over about half the members who
voted for Hon. H. B. Payne for United States
Senator. The action of the House in his case
will show whether this is an idle boast, as
those who oppose punishing him for his gross
insults to the House will be marked as the
ones whom he could blast by cpening the
little memorandum book he carries, and
claims contains the names of men and their
prices in the market in January, 1884."
Dickens is said to havo found the
original, or at least the suggestion, of
Sam Wcller in Samuel Vale, a popular
low conicdv actor, whom ho saw in his
youth. Vale's quaint comparisons
(which form also one of the humors of
Sam Welter's conversation), for which
his evcry-day talk was distinguished,
were lavishly introduced by the actor
into his part, and made a distinct hit.
Among those which have been recorded
wc find the following: " 'Come on.' as
the man said to the tight boot;" "'Why,
here we are, all mustered,' as the roast
beef said to the Welsh rabbit;" " 'Where
shall we fly?' as the bullet said to the
trigger;" " 'I know the world,' as the
monkey said when he cut oft his tail;
" 'There she is, musical and melan
choly,' as the cricket said to the tea
The Bank of England now coven
three acres of ground.
England is showing her grit.
Grant is worse.
The Dayton (O.) woolen mills burned
down. Loss $30,000.
I. S. Hyatt, one of the inventors of cellu
loid, died in Florida.
James Hubbtrtt, ot Indianapolis, was one
hundred years old Friday.
Francis Baum, the Texas forger, captured
in Chatham, Out., was extradited.
Geargie Snyder, a five-j ear-old boy, was
killed by a freight train at Canton, O.
President Cleveland drew his first month's
salary Friday, the amount being $3,888.87.
Congressman N. B. Eldridge is seriously ill
at his home in Adrian, Mich.
The Van Wert Skating Pavilion, the
largest in Northwestern Ohio, was opened
Lyman Roller, a farmer living near Alli
ance, O., was crushed to death by a falling
John Sexton, for the murder of George
Rowdan, was hanged at Barboursville, Ky.,
William Neal, the last of the three Ashland
(Ky.) murderers, was hanged at Grayson Fri
day. John C. Brand, of Louisville, Ky., com
mitted suicide by banging himself in his fur
Solomon Shipley, living mar Washington
C. H, O., committed suicide by drowning
himself while drunk.
Edwacd Hand a prominent livery man, of
Newark, O , had a leg broken by falling while
on roller skates.
Mrs. Ellen Patrick, aged eighty-three years,
died at her home nt Wilmington, O., Friday,
after a brief illness.
A little daughter of Patrick Dempsey, of
Washington C. H., O., had a leg broken by
being stepped on by a hotse.
Mrs. Elizabeth Van Note, aged eighty
years, died at the residence of her daughter,
Mrs. T. J. Hutchinson, Lehanon, O., Friday.
The steamer Wisconsin was sighted about
fifteen miles west af Grand Haven, Micb to
all appearances all right, but surrounded by
ice. The tug Arctic was seen about two miles
from the steamer.
The anniversary of the landing of Ponce de
Leon and the founding ot the city was cele
brated at St. Augustine, Fla., Friday.
Charles Dubbin and wife, three weeks mar
ried, were arrested in Decatur, 111., charged
with drowning their six months' old child.
Mrs. Mary A. Leonard has been admitted to
practice in the Federal Courts of Oregon, the
first female lawyer in the State.
An incendiary fire at Oakland City, Ind.,
destroyed fourteen buildings and caused a loss
of $75,000, upon which there is little insur
ance. A Russian fleet is reported to be only
eighteen days' sail from the unprotected Eng
lish port of Victoria, B. C. Considerable
An explosion of gas in the coal mines at
Lebu, Chili, caused the death of thirty-five
miners, and thirteen others were dangerously
Mrs. Kittle, an insane woman aged eighty
six years, was burned to death at Lebanon,
Pa. Her clothing took fire from a pipe she
The appointment of E. J. Phelps, Minister
to England, is looked upon with disfavor by
Eastern Democrats, who predict that it bodes
ill to the party.
An assault of rebels near Winnepeg resulted
in ten civilians and two policemen killed. The
Canadian troops retreated to Fort Carleton tor
The Mexican Secretary ot the Interior
issued a circular prohibiting religious street
processions during Holy Week, as it is a vio
lation ot the reform laws.
The "reign of terror" in Rowan county,
Ky., still continues, and the county buildings
and much private property is virtually in
possession of a faction of desperadoes.
The ferry steamer Mark Twain exploded
her boilers, Friday, while lying at the bank
at Mound City, Ark., killing five and severely
wounding several other persons.
The body of George Baschang, the four-and-a-half-year-old
boy who has been min
ing from his borne in Cincinnati since Ni
vember 13, 1884, was found in the caral
Michael Vaufman was killed by being
hurled from the top of the Soldiers' Memorial
Building, Toledo, O., by the breaking of a
derrick. Another workman was seriously
Lord Duflerin was received at Rawal-Pindi
by the Ameer of Afghanistan with great dis
play, and every appearance of good feeling
upon his part and that of his troops and sub
jects. A report that Englacd had given Rus
sia her ultimatum is disbelieved in London,
and it is reported, on the contrary, that the
Russian Ambassador has received from bis
Government a favorable reply to England's
proposals, with the stipulation, tLougb, that
the Afghans withdraw from Penjdeb, pending
the settlement ot the controversy. England
goes on with her war preparations with all
A Bold Robbery.
The man who drives the meat wagon for
Hamilton k Brannaman was robbed of the
proceeds of bis morning's work. The wagon,
at the time, was out near the East Street
Shops. The box containing the money was sit
ting in the back end of the wagon. The driver
wishing to drive around the street car to a
house en the other side of the street, left the
box where it was sitting and mounted to the
seat in front, first closing the rear door. Just
as he arrived at the house where he
wished to stop he heard the latch on the
door snap and turning around saw three
men running away, one of them having the
money-liox in bis hands. The thieves, first
taking all the money out ot the box, threw it
down, and in spite of a hot purcuit, escaped
A good description of them was given the
policesby several witnesses, and tbey will
probably be taken belore tomorrow.
Insurauce Man Dead.
Philadelphia, March 28. G. S. Winston,
President ot the Mutual Life Insurance Com
pany of New York, is dead.
A "TIP" IGNORED.
How Lake Sharp Attempted to Procnre
Information about l'arka.
England is often referred to by
Americans as a land of tips. This is as
unjust as if an Englishman were to
refer to this country as the land of the
tipsy. I know many instances where
tips have been refused, and one of
these I always have felt a littlo sore
about, and think still my English friend
took; a mean advantage of the inno
cence of a stranger in a strange land.
ThU'is how it came about. Detroit, as
all the world knows, bought an island
of about 800 acres with the intention of
making a park of it. Being in London
at the time I thought I would gather
together a little information about the
excellent and extensive parks of tho
metropolis and send it over to the
Secretary of the Detroit Park Com
mittee. I was walking through the beautiful
Temple Gardens of the Thames em
bankment with my friend, the English
man," when wo naturally drifted to the
subject of parks and I said to him:
"Iwant to find out what I can about'
parks to send to Detroit. How had I
better set about it?"
"That depends on what you want to
know about them. First try and con
centrate what mind you have on the
particular class of information you
want; then perhaps I can help you.
I want all the information there is
on the subject I was thinking of going
up td the British Museum reading room
and asking tho attendant to bring me
the books they have on parks."
"That's a good idea; a brilliant idea.
When the assistants pile around you
the tfeo or three tons of books they
have on that subject, I supposo you'll
expect your friends to get up a relief
party! and dig you out.
"What would vou do?"
"Well, I wouldn't begin with all the
books the British Museum has. Kow
here are the Temple Gardens, one of
the loveliest parks in the world. I'll
introduce you to the chief man, and
you can intcrtiew him."
"There's Hyde Park, for instance;
that's a sort of typical London park.
How conld I find out what I wanted to
know about that?"
"Write to the Ranger."
"I'll do that. Say, hadn't I better
offer him a tip of some sort? A half
crown or so? Would't he answer my
letter tho more readily?"
This seemed to strike my English
friend as a grand scheme. He looked
at me with admiration, and it was so
seldom that I advanced any ideas that
quite met his approval that I could not
help feeling gratified.
"You've got the plan at last! That
would be just the thing. Do it delicate
ly, you know. Use a Tittle diplomacy.
Just intimate in an offhand whole
soured manner that j ou don't mind a
half-crown or so, and if that, don't fetch
him nothing will."
"I suppose a letter addressed 'The
Ranger of Hyde Park, London,' would
reach him all right."
"Yes, that would do it."
When I got back to the office I wrote:
"Ranger of Hyde Park:
"Dear fciu 1 am ile-lrous of obtaining
what in lor mat ion 1 can about II) tie Park,
Its cor?ISiSiauil, c.it of con airactlon. num
ber of people emp'oyuit, etc, a d 1 H.Jnruff
pemaps yuu nuum ue guuu eiiuugit to man
me any pamphlets that jou have in ref
erence tu the matter. I shall be glad to
pay postage and any other expenses, and if
you would do me the favor to accept half a
crown for jour own trouble I si.all be
"Your obedient servant.
I waited day after day but received
no reply. Every time we met my Eng
lishman expressed surprise that the
Ranger had not ju nped at my half
crown offer. He seemed to have told
all his friends and mine about tho mat
ter, and when they met me they seemed
grieved that the Raugcr had not writ
ten. They always inquired. I never
saw people so anxious to help a person
on. At last the man whom 1 consider
entirely to blame, said to mc, as we
met on the Strand:
"By the way, did it ever occur to you
to find out who tho Ranger of Hyde
"No," I answered. "Do yon know
"Not personally. Ho is the Duke of
Cambridge, head of the British army
and uncle of the Queen. "Detroit Free
The Penalty or Skepticism.
"Come mighty nigh killin' a fine buck
dis mawnin ," said an old negro.
"Comin' long through tho woods an'
er ole buck he jump up, an' bookerty,
bookerty, he runs off a few yards
an' stop still. Come in one er shootin'
"Why didn't you shoot?"
"Didn' hab my gun wid me, sah."
"Then how did you come in one of
" 'Case, sah, I come in one o' taking
my gun wid me."
"Why didn't you take your gun?"
"JJidn hab none, san.
"You are an old fool."
"Look heah, doan 'buso er mandat
way when yer ain' got no cause. I ain't
got no gun.for a feller dat I wuz erbout
ter buy one frum, axed me jes' SI
mo'n I could pay. So, I come in one
o' gittin' de gun. If I had er got it I
would er tuk it 'long wid me, an' ef
I'der had it I could er shot de buck
easy, sah. So doan come 'roun'busin'
er man when do facks is all ergin yer.
I hab knowed folks to fetch trouble on
dar 'selves dat way. Er pusson ought
er be keerful in dis heah wort' o' sci
ence an' speckerlation. Good mawnin',
sah. Since yer's acted dis way, I
wouldenter gin yer none o' do meat ef
I had er killed it- 'Fore yer talked dat
way I wouldcr made yer present o'
some o' de buck. See whut yer got by
it, sah." Texas Siftings.
Saltpeter in Nevada.
The saltpeter beds of Nevada are far
better situated for tho development of
their deposits than the niter region of
South America, which is a desert en
tirely devoid of water and all vegetable
life, and where the development can be
accomplished only by surmounting
many difficulties; the provisions of the
miners havo to be transported from
long distances; tho water supply for
all purposes is condensed from tho
ocean water and carried to the niter
fields, while fuel has to be procured
from tho mountains in the South of
Chili. In Nevada, wc are told, the
saltpeter deposits are in the vicinity of
a rich farming country, with an abund
ant supply of water and food close at
hand, and the niter can be furnished at
prices considerably cheaper than that
for which the South American article
can be obtained. N. Y. Sun.
Bow Peter Duffy Wan Saved From Going
Into the Army.
During the darker days of the war,
when its holiday features had given
place to genuine blood and universal
sorrow; when the dazzling uniforms
had been dragged through the mud
and dust of many campaigns, and the
soil of every southern state had swal
lowed up the dear dust of brothers and
sons, and when the roll of drums and
the flash of swords no longer won new
recruits to death's grim carnival, there
came the draft, with all of the horrors,
but none of the dearly-bought glory of
Peter Duffy, an Irish blacksmith,
with a young wife and a largo family
of helpless little children, was among
the first in southern Wisconsin to draw
a sorrowful prize. He felt that he ab
solutely could not go. He tried every
way to evade the call to certain death,
but met with nothing but chagrin, rid
icule and defeat.
One day, Hon. James H. Earnest
was speaking in the state senate, when
a messenger came and told him that a
man outside the senate chamberwished
to see him. Owing to some misunder
standing, Mr. Duffwas ushered into the
room, lie had a good deal of hair,
which he allowed to grow in wild pro
fusion. He did not cold himself re
sponsible in any way for that hair. His
head looked like an old hair mattress
that had been turned wrong side out
by a cyclone and deserted by its friends.
He became the cynosure of all eyes.
The speech lost its interest and came
to a close.
"Now, Peter," said Mr. Earnest,
"what's the matter with you?"
"Sinator. I'm kilt, I'm a cold carpse.
Me wife is a widdy. They do have me
grafted, Jim. There's only half a
moile bechunc me and paradoise. I
want you to see the Prissident, or Jiff
Davis, or Gineral MickLillan. or some
of thim byes and save me loife. If ye
can't do it, Jim, I'm gorn oop, and me
wife is a weepin' widdy bound for the
poor house beyant. Hilp me out, Sin
ator. Pass a bill making it a lilony on
the hoigh saze to graft an Irish orpan
into this gineral massacree. Do that,
Jim, and I'll pray for ye all me loife,
and the Lord knows you nade it, too,
and I'll do all yer blacksmithin' at half
Mr. Earnest thought all those things
"Peter," said he, "you seem to be
elected by an overwhelming majority
and I'm afraid your resignation would
not bo accepted. Unless you fail to
Eass the medical examination, you'll
ave to go, I guess."
Then Mr. Duffy thought of some
thing. "Sinator, to tell the trooth, 1 can't
hear very well mcself. Whin I was an
apprentice, a red mool knocked the
dayloights out of mc and impared me
Mr. Earnest had never noticed this,
but he really didn't want to see Duffy
go, and in the kindness of his heart he
encouraged the idea a little. He even
went over to see Dr. Hoyt at Camp
Randall, and while they made some
scientific experiments with lemons and
sugar and spirits, he drew the conver-
v.LbnXU II. .AT.. -
to come down to the Park HotePfcudl
visit him at his room. At the appoint
ed hour Senator Earnest produced a
list of questions and told Mr. Duffy
that he would have to answer these
satisfactorily. Patiently they set to
work like a class of students who have
secretly secured a list of queries prior
to the day of examination. Every day,
after the legislative session had closed,
Mr. Earnest would repair to his room
in company with Mr. Duffy, and they
would go through the rehearsal. Fin
ally, tne time for Duffy's examination
came, and Senator Earnest had to go
to Camp Randall to assist. A question
would be propounded to Peter, and he
would turn with great gravity and
earnestness to Mr. Earnest, who sat by
him, and ask:
"What do he say Jim?" Then Jim
would bawl the question into Duffy's
off ear. The examination went on first
rate, only that Earnest nearly died
trying to keep a straight face. Finally
came the last test, which generally
caught the impostor. Dr. Hoyt turned
with creat disjnist to the other exam
ining surgeons and said:
"Gentlemen, we don't want this
bump on a log. He can't hear any
thing. I think we had better leave the
blankcty-blank wooden-head at home,
where his family can attend to him and
see that he don't miss the resurrec
tion." This was said in a low tone of voice
to catch the unwary Irishman, but
slowly he turned to Senator Earnest
and gravely inquired:
"What do he say. Jim?"
Then Earnest, red in the face with
suppressed emotion, bellowed into
Duffy's best ear:
"The doctor says you can't
hear anything. He thinks you
had better stay here where your
family can call your attention
to the-rcsurrection." Bill Aye, in
New York Mercury.
Made Himself Felt.
When a well-known member of this
community, now dead, was state sena
tor from this city, he was engaged in
some verv radical measures which
sorely cut'into many people whom he
thought were in need of reform. They
abused him very thoroughly, but in
his honestv he maintained tho fight
strongly. A friend of his from the city
visiteii him in Sacramento while the
measures were pending.
"Well, what do they say of me in
"They don't speak very well of you.
"What do they say about me? That's
what I want to know."
"Well, thev say very rough things
about you. I don't care to "
"Speak it out. Tell me how they
talk." j ,
"They call you a liar, a scoundrel, a
thief, an ignoramus, an idiot every
thing they can think of that's bad."
"Ah," said the senator, rubbing his
hands in glee and chuckling in perfect
enjoyment, "they feel me, my boy,
they feel me." San Francisco CTrw
Oa the island of Formoso when any
one is taken sick he is strung up by the
neck and let down with the "dull
thud," common at executions. This
performance is intended either to kill
or cure the unfortunate patient.
A San Franciscan proposes a schema
lor DUUUlllg a uuauijg toun aj
MURPHY &. BRO.
1 LDTGERMAN DAMASK TOWELS
10c, 12c, and 15c each.
1 LOT GERMAN DJIMA5K AND HliCK TQWELS
20c and 25c each.
Truse art Decided and Extraordi
5-8 Bleach and Unbleach all
Linen Napkins, 75 c per
Astonishingly Goed Values in
3-4 Bleach and Napkins
$3.50, worth $450.
$4, worth $5 per
Examins the All Linen Loom
Damask Tabling at 37c,
50c, 60c, and 75c.
10-4 Lunch Cloth Fringe Border
all Linen, $125 to $2.
Lowest Prices ever
Extra Fine 'Lunch Sets
Lot Extra Large Turkish
Bath Towels, $175 per
dozen; would its
cheap at $2.50
is fall of
lowest. , -v
48 & 50 Limestone.
The Chances of Fewer Marriage.
Girls are no more angels than men
are apes, and there are other vices be
sides impurity, such as envy, unchari
tablencss, malice, untruthfulness, and
ill-temper. Are all the vices on our
side? Post-nuptial backslidings are
worse than ante-nuptial divagations,
and if the balance is to be struck after
marriage it is not easy to say on which
side the slide would be. There is one
lesson which we, all of ns, in what
ever rank or society we may be, have
to learn, and the sooner we learn it
the better tho lesson of humility, of
modesty, of economy. We are no
longer the lords of creation; we have
no longer a monopoly of capital or
production, rents and interests will
fall lower still, and unless we realize
the situation, come down from our
high horse, and moderate our views of
style and expenditure, very serious
trouble will overtake society. We had
better give up sneering at those "dirty
foreigners," and imitate a little of their
frugality. But the example must be
set by those above; so long as the
leaders of the great world indulge in,
display, those below will spend their
last shilling in an insane attempt to be
in the running. Diamond, lace, cost
ly fabrics, whether for dres or furni
ture, long and lavish dinner parties,
heavy suppers after balls, all these
things might be made unfashionable
by a"wave of Zenobia's wand. Unless
some change of this kind is made ia
our habits, or unless some happy rev
olution occurs in our economic history,
there will be fewer marriages than ever
in Vanity Fair. The National Review.
John Danforth, known as "Major
John," was a character of whom the
Connecticut papers are now telling an
ecdotes, Danforth being under the sod.
His chief oddity was nis spread-eagle
patriotism, copied from that of Jona
than Brooks, who, clad in red clothes
of continental cut, used to mount Gor
ton's heights. New London, and de
liver an oration to wondering urchins
and grazing cows. One day when there
was a real meeting at the grove, Dan
forth got up to make an address. Soon
after ne had begun the quick-witted
president of tho day sprang to his feet
and shouted: "Three cheers for Mai.
Danforth, who has just finished his
great speech!" The major stood be
wildered amidst a cannonade of ap
plause and finally sat down like a man
in the mazes of a dream.
We believe Congress should take
&rompt action to revise the present
oniestead laws. They are far too lib
eral. The grant of 160 acres is too
much. Eighty acres would be ample,
and we ore inclined to the opinion that
forty acres would be generous on the
part of the Government. Any farmer
C3n earn a living on forty acres of land.
The Government could secure more set
tlers and better develop the Territories
by providing transportation to heads of
families to the point nearest the land
they desire to locate. Adrian (Ji'cA.)