Newspaper Page Text
DAILY CAIRO BULLETIN.
CAIRO. ILLINOIS. TUESDAY MORNING, MARCH 1,' 18JU.
NEW SERIES-NO. 209
TI1K TWENTY-FIRST ANNUAL STATEMENT OF THE
EQUITABLE LIFE ASSURANCE SOCIETY
OF THE UNITED STATES, 130 RROADWAY, NEW YORK.
IlKNIiY II.HYDK. ProsMt nt.
FOR THE YEAR ENIIN(i
AMoINTOF I.KUHKII J III! 1.
', ,'ISH 'I'.l'i' Iii
Premium. $ ii.:-.'iii i ii
IntcreM and renin .... l.'.'iji'.'i 'H
Net prollt on invi otnii-Tit i!.!,nl7 i
ii 7 nr.
Claim. t,y death mid niniiircrl endow
im nt. j..V ',.:il "I
I)lvid'Ml. furn'nli:r value, mid an
llllitici J.l'Hi 1 1 1 1 l
Ii xc'iii ii ti- ri iw rn: ji t uml matured
tontine pole )-n I , ; in
Total p.ild policyholder I ' 'I'iT 'i'r
niviilrliil III! lip ll! . T.lUnrt
Aneiific. and ciiiiiniU"itiri .. k:l.l.f. 1,1
(i.'iierai i iii'iio "'".'' "'
Man , county unit city lux, ss.Ms '.n
Ncton-li ux-itH. )u;. :t. ls-i f I'" s I 'rj
Bond, and miirl,H'!s - .". t. ( "
I'nited stuti-H r a. "e ''
Slate tork. r it - ln k. and
aiilhortfd hy the Iw "I Hi'' fl '''
nl v-w vri .... - 'I-: iv
Loan, i-cumi liv Ihhi'I and "I'M k- '. '! :ii s
Iti ul rxtnii- in Seiv York and llo.ion
nii'l pun h'l-'-'l under Inn-i '.""in .. f. , i,.'
Ca-h im hand In hank- mid utln r (!
MtNiti iricrr on 'liler. ! hum 111 If'iiell
i .iiu re eivd i
I ) 1 1 . from .''-iii on ' ' o::nt "'f pre
til i ti tn
:m i. 'i c;
,ii n itj
Murk, t vn'.'i.'nl Hin k an I li iiid"
ovr ' "t
Iri''!rt't tttnl r- iii'' d n- ninl 'ii" 'n -d
r..'lllllll!l ll'l" uIm ill .il'l-" f
i idle -ti'iti i ' ( r ii 1 1 u i n "iid In
adviiiii ". J'-'i "d i
Ii IWrrd r in "in" ' "
'I'llt.l'l Hf" I"
. i-.! i: i ,'t
To'al lt'.l!ii' im !udi:,.' '".'nl !'
ii r'." f"f r"(Tin'uii( nl iii i-U"!
'1 oit! nu ll ,d' I '.i i im '
(if vl,' 'i ii 'lnli.'- la- r-i:n;i i'e ! , !i
il - I .' 'I -Ml ' I l" ... I 'fi.'l'il -I
1 1'. Ii K Ii !i".in.'. a rniiiiii. d , to
lulli if Ill l"i,ti!ie rlaK .-.. i
Ri-k AxiniiiMiin i 1 7.:;o.", on
RNksOiiManiliii?; l 77,..!)7.7n: ki
JJII.l, AMI I'OM mission.
( A 1 1: ' l'.!.INis
t a i.r. im iv
FLOL'R. HRA1N AND HAY
Hicliest Cikh Pi ire Paid fur Wheat.
T. LOl'IS, I. M.,tS(). RY.
IIKiN MOUNTAIN ROU'IE.
1UAIS- I.KAVK ( Mild.
Atkaia ami Tex.i- K x i-r. 11 I , a.m. Dni'.v
Ai-.i.n r. at i Mil",
Kiiiri'ii '- 'i 'n 1 i' ' v
AtoiiiiiihiIhI loll !"" I' in. Ui.'.)
i l Mill) l.l'Vei'.
II II .MII.IU'KN. A.-eiit.
JLLINOIS CKNTUAL R. R.
Shortest and Quickest limit e
St. Louis and Chicago.
Tho Only IAna Wtitinint;
9 DAILY TRAINS
MARINO DlKKCT CoNNKfTloX
TlUINH I.KAVI! CaIKh:
Arrlvlnu In Kt. I.nnl. :irm.in.: 'hti-ni;(i. t :: ji.tn. ;
Cunm-r.tltiir at. tnlln ami Kltltinhuiu fnf 'tiii-.m-liatl,
l.oul.vllli', liidliiiiiipuli. ntid point. Kurt
llilO ti.in. tsl. liOnlN mill W'chIitii
Arrlvlnu; In HI. I.oiila Vm.'i p, in., unit chihi'tHui:
fur all poltiiH Wat.
4:!JO p.m. l-'not 1'iX prc-oH.
rnrSt, l.niiln and cliliiii;", nrrtvtnt; at HI. I.tml.
HIiiii p.m., Kn(IC'liliai)7:"Jii in
p. jii. C MiK-lnntitl l-lx pi-ohm.
Arriving m Cincinnati 7:il a.m.; Lomnvllln 7:
a m.; liiilliuiuiollii d :l h i n.iii. raamnuii. Iy
int. irnin n-aih ilm almvu pnlnl. 1 :j to Mil
IIOLHS In advance ol any otlior rniilo.
Ffrjh';W t. nipTfM haa PULLMAN
Sf.fcKriNU CAK Cinni i, I'lnrlimall. wlthiiut
rhntmiia, and llirmiKh ali-cmia Hi M, i.iiiiIk ami
bt Timo lOnst.
TiJciilKCHI'W '' II'Ik.IIihi KiithriniL'li to I'.a.t
'"n'-" I'" in without ,iny ilnluv
niu.mi ny runiiav iiiu'rveiiinij. 'ia. Hniiirduv (trior
noon train from Culm arrive. In new V, l m,.,i,.
mornliiii at ii::).'i. Thirty alx hniimlu ailvamu-o'l
unv ollmr rnlitii,
gUTKor thrniiuli llckiit. nn it fnrlhi-r liifoniiHtlon,
),i,lv .1 1111,,.. I. l-iiiilciil llitllrniiil ll,,i.,.
"i'r" -' ' i -n, , niru,
JAS, JdllNSON, J- II. JON KM,
di-ii. Honthi-rn Anottl. 'rtemit Acntit
A. II. HANHUN, den. Aifmit, Chlcimo,
DKCE.M I5KR U!,
Krom the undivided nirplu.. reversionary divi
dend will Ipu de, lined, available cn m-ttlcnmtit nf
next miininl ir in mm, lo ordinary participating
'I III' Valuation (if tin: ollcil'H lllltHlHtlllitll! tl UH
Jn::n 111 H'lu nil till! A llllTK'HIl e X MTIl'liro Ullll!, I be
li''iil .latiilird nf tin' .late, of New Yurk.
(. W. IMIII.I.II'S. I .,.,-,,,.
.1 (.. VAN t. lsi;. j Actumlm.
We. ill" im l' TKliii d, Iibvc. Iii ii:rnn, (Hrcfully
c.vuniiued tlM' r-. hi hi h, inl roiitit-d and examined
in detail the tp k,i . ol tin' xix'.U'ty. and certify that
tin' fiir'-'imiy i-tnleiiieiu thereof in mrrcct.
IIKN N I M i'l'l I N K. HANDOI.I'JI,
IA.MKS H AI.STKI).
TIIUM s A I MMISS,
HKS'KV S. TKUHKI.L.
flu-Mai ('niniiMtti'c nf tin; Hunrd of Illrrrtom,
iiiiniiiic(i Oct. .'V. IKhii. to cxaiuitjc! tin; hhuc'ii
and ai count" nl tin: lion' nf tin- ytnr.
liituuMii' nniKi. rnits.
If' n'v It Ihd". .'utiii A. Sl.:viirt.
ir'i' I ,M(iriiu.
Ii'llll ll ,lllll('l.
i.-ni.-f 1". 'l"i'.
Il' hrv A. Hiirlliin.
I', nr t Spiniiilin .,
i lMi.n II. I'.'t,,
W il,;am . 'A i,i , 1,.' k,
r.ik. i II indv.
U 111, am i , . . m,l r',
l, iir l .M irij'mnil
.1:1 III, H VV. S i liilidi l ,
II, rv T. r I
'I Ih,Mii, S Vnll"l'.
'ritnmiii, I itiiiiuiji-.
I : i.. t t lin.-,
I tun ii-l i. I., id,
.lani" M f I r. , - . i
ll"rm- I'urt, r.
ii nr.l W I. am',, it.
Ii. !' H.nii',ii,.
ii i" n "l'r,.k
.,,lll s'r, I,,-.
-ti !.. ! fir, , ii.
S ini i, I ll,,rr(,.i,'.
II, -i,rv '. Hull. i.
"nr."' II. Si, .miiI.
I In-r t I.' imx Ki tiDcly,
liantii-y M. Iii-pi-w,
H n nin in Williamniin,
lli'iiry M. Ali xiindi r,
i: . r,iiiniiiiit it,
1 human A lliddl",
I tinrt'c W. ( arli inn.
,.i.r." I.. K i' 1 1 1.
.In" K Navarro,
John I. Mii ook,
M",!i"ii II. IMii.liim,
Siiiiimd V 'I'orriy,
( liari ii l.andim,
Thi'iifliin; W i-ton.
A Ii i indi r I'. Initi,
I I),- U'iit I'nyiiT,
I. (Ill KitH'THM.
William M. Illi-H.
Siiinu, I d. l,ooilr:rh
JAM l W. AI.KX.VNDKIl, Virc I'rrVt.
SAMl'KL IIOKKOWK, Yin.. JWt.
Mi 'lie il K:iuiiii r :
, K. W I. tiiil-. r?. l I i., Ivin M Curtis, M. 1).
r.. . N'utt, Slip, I itltiinii lit n A gt'lirifS.
North W'r-tcrn l,'i,irtiin nt.
1' I arli. im Str.-et. lnri;ij.
E. A. I;('RXKTT. Aff-iit,
( iiini, Illinois.
Mayor - N. H. TlenilewiMid.
'I n afiirer Kd ard lie.niiia.
rierk -Di-niiiii. .1. Knli-y.
I'liunm-liir- .Wrn. 15. iillt.i-rt.
Mnr.ha: . . ;,pl, i,.,,n.
Allortn y W i 1 !i a m llnidrirk.
HOAIUI or ALI'IHXEI.
Kr-lWrd M .1 llowli-r. Ti ter Sanp.
s, (,!, d Ward Iiavld T. 'Uiir-far, J.-uHe H'.tiklf
Tl :r.l Ward -Kel.ert Smllli. H. K. lllakc.
Ko .rtli Ward-l liarlen (i. I'atler, Adnlih Sho
lioea Kii-h Ward -T W. Ila'li.lav. Ermut B. I'etttt.
' in el! .I,.d.-e- I). .'. linker.
I' r, ,A r;,.tk - . Irkin.
( 'otl,:y J Ml I: S.YlK lllll.
I ihii.'.v I .erk s J. Hun: t:i .
i oil n t Atloriwy -.1 . M liamron.
Coiiniy 'I rea-'ir.-r--Min V. l'arker.
M;i-ri:f - John Uod-eii.
Coroner- l(. KilL-1'ra,i..
Countv Coni!iiin.!orii.rii-T. W. Halllday, J. A
M. iiihtn. Sam I Unify.
' KNi-.KM. IF.I.IVKIIY ln-n ::l
O : t" j. m . . Sumjiiy : a to 'J a. m.
a m. ; clo.e
l iii"y dr ier l). ,ar'.nn'iit open at g a. m.; clout.
ii .i p. in
ri'mu.-h K.rem Mail. ia lllu.oi. Central 3:4i
ti. in .
Mu.fi,i,i Ci-n-ral Uallrnail. clo.e at II p. ni.
I' .'ro mm! 'o;,.ir IlluT Throiiirh and Way Mall
"I a: 1 p ly
Unv Mai' vl , f I "- 1 1 . i- Central, f'airo and Vln
.fi.n. f and Mi-".i.,pi i.'eiitral Kailroad. clo.e at
:.i i. in.
Way Vail for Narriiw (jatijjc luilroad clo.ca at
::.o i. m.
Cairn and Kvatinvillo Hlver Rotite clo.ei at !:30
p in. ilaliy (en fpt r Tlday).
FltlC N M K. - Knurtceiith dlri'i-t. befwcmi
Wiilnut mid Cedar .trcet.; mirvtre. Sabhaia 11
a. in. and 7: Vi p. in ; Sntidiiy Srlnml l:;m p. m.
plU HCll "K T1IK KKOEEMKKHEpUwipal)
' I niirtfi'tiin .iri'i't; Ptiinuy MornniR prayi-rii
Itcni a. m ; cvi'tiimt tirayiT., 7;:Ki p. m.: Sunday
elioo li:dil a. m. Ki iday i-venini: prayor ":W p, m.
llltST MISSION AMY BAIT I ST CHl'KC'H.
I l'reaihliiL' at 1 -V a. in., it ti. tn., and 7:W o. m.
Salil-a'h .ihool at :;tii p. m. Ili-v. T. J. Hhorca,
It'TllF.liAN Thirieenili mrei'H H'rvin-a Sah
J luiih l a m.; Siimlny .i huiil'ip. in. Itrv.
MKTIIolilsT-Cor Klu-liil' Mid Walnut .tn-eta;
I'reai'hliii: Snhluiih ln:di a. in. ami 7ti.in.:
prayer mi'i'liiiir. Wcdticdiiy p. m.; Hutiday
School, a in. Ki t. Whlltakcr, pa.lnr.
I HIKSUY'I'KUIAN Kluhlh .trci-l; prcai lilne on
Sahhaili nl Hum a m. and 7:.'n. m itiravcr
mci'llin; Wfdiif.day at 7;H'ip. in.; Sunday School
al ;) p. hi, Kcv. II. Y. 'M'lirjc, pa.tor.
CKCONI) KKKE WI LL BAI'TIST - KinceLtU
k .ircii, lieiwi'eii Walnut uml Cedar alrui-ta; sur
vice Snlil.nl ti at : and 7::M p. in.
CT JOSKI'irS-dlninan Callinllcl rnrtmr CrnM
O and Walnut .trcel.; .ervlcc. Sahhalh IDiHIla.
n. ; Sunday Si hool at 'J p. m. ; Vc.pnra .1 p. m. ; ai-r-riri'i
ever) day al H p. tn.
CT. l'ATIIICK'S-(H"tnni t'allinlli'K'orticr Ninth
kJ .trect ami Wa.hln;t"ti avenue; acrvtcca Hab
uiilli H ami III a tn.; Vcpcr. :) p. tn.; Pnnday School
' p in. aervlci " every diiy at H p. m. Hi-v. MiixtriNoii
'()MAN'S cillllSTIAN 'IKMI'KIIASfli UN
ii i i 'V1, 'nr weekly tni'i'tltii;. In
in" hiil I ol I h.i t aim Tempi-rinice lieform I'ltth. cv
!'ry. ' n'i"i"liiy an, ninoii, at ;i::m o'cloik. Kvery
hndy . hiviteil lu ullend.
QEORlSE II. LEACH, M. I).,
lii.vsicinn and Siiixt'iui.
Sperlnl intention puld to Die llotncopiillilr. treat'
""'l"l"l'l 'r-'n '' ,lll",n"1'"' ''""'""t'lt f women
ttilln-: No. Id Kluhlh airuet, near CuiniuurcUl
iiveinie, t aim, III..
QU. E. W. AVII1TLOCK,
Omen-No. tl" Ooiiimr-rclul Avonuo, between
ElKhlh mid Ninth St reel
)"R. W. C. JnCKLYN,
D K NT I ST.
OPl'lt'K-Kljiliii Street, near Commercial Avenue,
NOTICEABLE POINTS IN THE 21st
ANNUAL STATE.M EXT OF THE Kl lT
ALLE LIFE ASSURANCE SOCIETY;
SKW YORK. JAN. 1st, I UK I.
Assets, $H,101t,C02; an Increase of
nioro than Three Million Dollars in
Surplus, $'J,22il,2'.i r; an increase ol'
One and Tliree-iinirt'r Millions of Dol
lars in li!!!0.
New Lusiness, 8:J5, 170,805: an in
crease of Eight and a half Million Dol
lars in 18K0.
Amount paid to I'o icy-holders and
their representatives during 1880,
A liheral surrender value in paid-up
insurance Is provided for in nil ordina
ry policies, in case of forfeiture.
Tontine Savings Fund Policies may
be terminated at the close of certain
delined periods, on terms more advan
tageous than upon any oilier plan.
These policies prove more profita'dc to
the policy-holder than any other form
Actual examples can ho furnished ;it
the Society's office, of persons Lei g in
sured for ten xears, and then upon
terminating their Tontine Policies, re
ceiving cah in some instances equal to
the whole of the premiums paid; in
others, nearly all.
No technicalities nor arduous condi
tions in policy coutracts.
Policies incoiitcstahle alter having
been in force for three years. All such
incontestable policies w ill he paid at
maturity, without reliate of interest,
immediately after the receipt at the
Society's oflic.e in New York of satisfac
tory proofs of death, together with a
valid and satMaetorv discharge trom
the pitrties in interest, ami without re
quiring any delay, even for sixty or
ninety days, as has been the custom
heretofore, and is still UMial with other
GltOCKKIES. BOOTS AND SHOES.
THE BOSTON STOKE
STAPLE and FANCY
G 11 0 C K n 1 K s
Provisions, Green, Dried and Canned
Fruits, Queens, Glass Wood
BOOTS axi) SHOES
The Best Rmiul of Flour
always cm hand
TO HA CUOS,Cl G A 1 1 S, 10 1 o
N. II. -Country I'rmlure taken. All Order,
Cor. WiikIiIiiIoii Ave. and Tenth St.
CAIRO, : : : : ILLINOIS.
rpUE CITY NATIONAL BANK
W.T. HALLWAY, I're.ldent.
II. L. HALLWAY, Vlre l're.ldent.
THUS. W. HALLWAY, Cannier.
. aTAATa TAYLOR, W. r. ItAM.IllAT,
HRNHT L. 1IAUJ1IAT, R. H. ClINNINHIIAKi
a. D. WII.LIAMaON, .TKI'llBN Ulllt),
Exchange, Coin and United States Bunds
BOUUHT AND SOLD.
Dcim.lt. received and a general lltiklim bii'ltn'"'
Outfit aunt free to thoxo who w l.h t en
jKo In the mn.t plea.ant and proiimniu
iu.lne.a known, Kverytlilni; new.
.'aiiital not reotilred. Wo will furiil.h
everything . am. tlnvand nnward. I. vet
hnmn over nlKlit,1No rl.k w haleser. Jlauy new
work'T. wanted at mice. Manv arn maklnir fort
vhh v iniini U' iiwnii loL'iiur aiiiiv irmn
line, a the Im. Inc.., Ladle, mnko a. inui li
men, .ltd vouiirr hoy. and i,,. ,.Ke (.'rent pay. No
one wno In wlUliitf lo work falla lo make mom
nietiey every day Hian cau be madeln a week at any
oilier eniploytnent. Tno.o wbo eDB( at oncti
ii i i i rw i, "n, rorinno. Addren ll
IIALLK1T A ( 0.,1'ortland Malno,
The Iron Chancellor.
Prince Rismarek, thev whisper, is un
happy. It id not, says the Indon Eni
jtirtt.'tliitt Im can not drink his favorite
brown beer km of yon-. It is not that
the malignant neuralgia twitobe his
martyred jaw, It is not that bis favor
ite d(fg is rno)iiio;, or that his favorite
nuinuni-e at Yarzin, who stands in tho
sfttiie relation to Iniu its the jiveitoii
huti lierdid to Lord Paliru-rstoti, ismoro
insolent than ever. No! It is private
grief that vexes hirn, it is true, and a
small ones at that; but these small pri
vate griefs have a power of annoyance
ludicrously disiiroixirtioned to their out
ward significance. Under the pres-uro
of a great calamity one can fold his to
ga, decently exhibit fortitude, and (litt
ler himself that he is playing tho noldo
Koman. lint those, petty trials worry
like tho stings of wasps, and put the pa
tient of roost heroic mold into a high
fever. It is one of those which erosi-s
tho temper ami impairs the digestion of
tb awful chancellor, no covet.s an
Enirli.-h di-eoratiian-ritlier the Hath or
the (Jailer; In is not particular as to
the tdiado of ribbon. If it bo really
tnie that this trifle disturbs the equan
imity of tho "rrcat man (and wo own we
doubt it), the sooner he gets either dec
oration tho better for tho peace of Eu
rope. Hut preeodont is omnipotent,
even in tins instance, ami no iocs to
learn that be will have to Lido bis time.
Meanwhile Ik- can console himself uiih
the thought that he can load his breast
any day he chooses with a neat and ap
propriate selection from the four hun
dred and sixty-six orders bo is entitled
to wear. Nrne of these came to Iii in
cx officio; others poured in as custom
ary international compliments; one,
that of the Red Kaglo, lie received for
the curious cxeiiMt thai bis daughter
Maria had made a capital marriage;
but in all this mass of gewgaws there is
prominent for its niode.ity tint Mtnplo
medallion, 'lor re-i-uo from danger."
To his credit be it i-pokcn, the iron pol
itician i prouder of his humble dUc of
metal than of ail tin- insignia lavished
upon him by kings. He earned it when
a cavalry ofiieer with the Stargard innd
wehr squadron of Uhlans, in the sum
mer of by saving, Ht imminent
risk, his servant Hildebi and from drown
ing in the lako at Lippehne, in the Neu
niark. This was the only decoration ho
possessed for many years. It has often,
among diplomatic grandees, excited
curiosity, and on one occasion, with a
celebrated embassador, even ridicule.
To this diplomatist's sarcastic prayer to
be told tho meaning of the medallion,
the grim chancellor, with a look which
went through his questioner, replied:
"I am in the habit, your excellency, of
Having a man's life sometimes. "
Most every farm house contains what
is called the best room, and which is
only used on extraordinary occasions;
it being almost wholly closed not only
to tho members of the family, but to
the null and light. Now it strikes tis
that tho most conveni-'fit. agreeable,
and for that matter, the most pleasant
room in the house .should ho selected as
the family room. Let its doors be ever
open, and when the work of tho kitchen
is completed let the motln-r ami iiaugn
ters bo found there with their appropri
ate work. Let it be the room where
the family altar is erected, and conse
crated to neatness and purity. Let no
hat ever be seen in that room on the
head of its owner; let no coatless indi
vidual be permitted to enter it. If
father's bead is bald, and some there
are in that predicament, bis daughter
will bo proud t see his temples covered
by tho neat and graceful silken cap that
her own hands have fashioned for him.
Let that table which has always stood
under the looking-glass, against the
wall, bo wheeled into the. room, ils
leaves raised, and plenty of useful
books and periodicals bo laid upon it.
When evening comes bring on the
lights -and plenty of them-for sons
and daughters, all who cau. will bo most
willing students. They will read, they
will learn, they will discuss tho subject.s
of their studies with each other, and
parents will often be quite as much in
structed as their children. The well
conducted agricultural journals of our
day throw a flood of light upon tho
science ami practice of agriculture;
will show its efl'ects to every passer-by,
for with books and studies like these a
purer taste is born and grows most vig
orously. George Eliot's Funeral.
Tho rain boat, down heavily on
freorgo Eliot's collin as it was lowered
into tho grave at lligbgato cemetery. Il
was covered with (lowers, and on tho
plate was inscribed;
M ARY ASS moss,
Born IM Nov., IH.-U; died 3M Dae., 1S80.
Clio apandc (II parinrai largo flume
Dr. Sadler, tho Unitarian clergyman
who conducted the services at tho grave
of Mr. Lowes, made a memorial ad
dress which touched to tears many of
his listeners. "To those who are pres
ent," he said "it is given to think of tho
gentleness and delicate womanly grnco
and charm which were combined with
'that breadth of culture ami universal
ity of power which,' as one has
repressed it, 'have mado her known to
all tho world.' To thoso who are pres
ent is given to know tho diffidence and
self-distrust which, notwithstanding all
public fame, needed individual sympa
thy and encouragement to keep her
from feeling too keenly how far the re
sults of her labors fell holovr the stand
ard sho had sol before her. To thoso
who are present, too, il may be given
though tnoro is so large a number to
whom it is not given to understand
how a nature may bo profoundly devout
and yet bo unable to accept a great
deal of what is usually held im religious
belief. No intellectual diflicultios or
uncertainties, uo sense of mental inca
pacity to climb tho heights of InllniUulfl
could take from her tho piety of tho af
flictions or tho beliefs which were tho
niothor-tongue of her soul.''
ON A1ISAI.OM THOMl'SON'l VT.
Then tic rim tn hi. parent Item ftod told,
And tho parent aleru replied:
"There ain't no harm in a veat; allile out."
But Hie Ud refuHRd to alMc.
"Thero ain't no harm in u vest, I know,"
And hu eye rushed bright that minute,
"Hut imi't it (UiiKi roui, dad," he nuked,
"Whan Alixalniu Thumpaon' ID ll?"
When the Indians go on a slaying
party, they gel out their runners.
Regular rehearsals have been recom
mended lor new book canvassers.
1'ob Iiiger-oll says that it was drink
ing hoii I eollee which fust made him
You might as well try to strike a
light on a block of ice as to do business
When a married woman buys a pug
dog for a low price she gets a bargain
and her husband gets something to
Virginia is getting nioro than her
wont of snow. This is tho first real in
dication of the growing Northern fool
ing said to be noticed there.
Miss Lisetta Reist. of I,ond"n, latoly
deceased, left money to be used forever
in sprinkling Tower street hill with sand,
to prevent horses from slipping.
Anxious small boy "Ma, where did
I chuck my .skates alter tho ice broke up
last spring? Ilridget, do you know
whero'n thunder my sled is?''
"Well, Miss," said a knight of tho
birch rod, "can you decline a kiss?"
"Yes, sir," said the girl, dropping a
perplexed courtesy, "1 can, but I halo
to most plaguily."
Stanley says the American Nation
could tie set down in the heart of Africa
and tind itself lost. Our lightning-rod
peddlers would open communication
"What earthly use is it," exclaimed
a languid Washington swell the other
morning, "our twying to be awisto
cwatic, motiaixhiai and that sort of
thing, w hen a Senator of the United
Wales eals peanuts while riding in the
street cars. We're nothing hut a dim'd
horrid republic, after all."
Little six-year-old was taking his
first lesson in addition, ami when the
teacher asked hen, "If I were to give
joii two cats and another nice lady gave
you two more, how many cats would
you have?" he quickly replied, "Why,
pretty soon 1 wouldn't have any, for
my mamma would break their necks
with the broom. She don't like cats."
-- yarn sin irn 11 rnfil.
No wonder a man hates to have bis
piil lire taken. When he gets seated
the photographer tells him to look per
feclly natural. So the fellow makes a
desperate eltort to twist his face into its
natural expression. The ell'ort gener
ally result in an expression like unto
thai of a mailman trying to look cross
eyed and ilana murder at the same
time, and when he sees the picture ho
thinks that if it looks natural ho must
be too mortally homely to have his pic
ture lying around. And he doesn't
submit to the process again in a hurry.
A well dressed ( :i I vest u gentleman
found himself in a very embarrassing
situation yesterday, lie bad left his
money at home, and not a nickel or a
ear ticket could he find anywhere in
his clothing. Me was about lo leave
the ear, when a perfect stranger with a
.sinister cast of countenance tendered
tliegentlem.il) a nickel, ho gladly ac
cepted il and dropped it into ilie box
The gentleman then shook his unknown
beiieiaclor b tiie hand, thanking him
for tin- coiilideiii e and iiccomnuidalioii,
and asking for hi address so us to re
turn ihe ne y. '-.Never mind," re
sponded I ne generous man, liercely,
"it's a counterfeit, anyhow. The
si reel car company w ill make that hell
hound of a driver redeem it. They
will dock bis waes. I've got no spile
at you. lie is the scoundrel I am al';cr,
lie has trilled wiih the ntl'ections of my
sister, but. this will show him what sort
of a man I am w hen my blood is up."
Two compositors in the odico of Che
Newliuryporl llrtll, have patented a
tvpe-sifter. It is a reverse caso cover
ed wit Ii a win- screen. It is placed up
on the type case, fastened al Iho four
coiners by clamps, ami Ihe two are
turned over. Ii removes the type from
the case, whereby the latter may bo
cleaned, and the dirt in tho type sifted
out; second, a font of typo may be
changed from one case to another in a
few minutes; ami third, it thoroughly
mixes the hpo in each box, bringing
into use the new loiters from tho bot
tom of the case. All this may bo done
without making any pL
A Gorman Oartoon.
The Gorman comic papers represent
tho Imperial Chancellor as Father
Christmas opening the door of his fes
tive chamber to his ministerial chil
dren, who enter with an Impatient rush,
and madly overturn the illuminated
and heavily-weighted tree in their anxio
ty to clutch at, ihe rich and rare things
provided for them. They scramble with
desperate eiigeniess for a helmeted
puppet inscribed "protection;" for a
sugar heart entitled "free Irade;" for a
gingerbread hook on denominational
schools, for an ornamental copy of
Lessing's "Nullum the Wise" (done
into fluent Hebrew); for a scent bottle
containing the "essence of intolerance;"
for a painted block of barracks crown
ed with ''" to h'ririjrr; and for a
jam-tart hill for abolishing and abating
tho public taxes.
The authorities of tho posUiflleo In
Glasgow, Scotland, aro about tn mnko
arrangements for the permanent light
ing of the main departments of tho
building with the Cotnpton uloetrlo
system. Satisfactory experiments have
been made with that system for somo
timo in tho sorting-room and la tho
telegraph instrument ollleo.
Itching Piles Symptoms and Cure.
The symptoms, are moisture, like pers
piration, intense itching, increased by
scratching, very distressing, particularly at
night, as ifpin worms were traw ling in and
about the rectum ; the private parts are
soinetiiiiesiilleclcil ; il' allowed to continue,
very .scrums results may follow. Dr.
Swayne's All-Ileaiinn Ointment is a pleas
ant sure cure. Also, for Teller, Itch. Salt
Rheum, Scald Head, Krvsipelas, limber's
Itch, IJIotchcs, nil Scaly Crusty Cutaneous
Eruptions. Price oO cents, : boxes for ft ,2-j.
Sent by mail to any address on receipt of
price in currency or three cent postago
stamps. Prepared only by Dr. Swiiyne ifc
S m, ;j:i0 North Sixth street, Philadelphia,
Pa. Sold by all prominent diuggists in
Cairo and e sew here.
Swayne's Pill- arc the best for all bil
ious disorders. They ward oil' Chills and
Fever. ( 1 )
, Why lie Stood It.
Detroit V'rce Pre.
On tho afternoon of election day a
half drunken rowdy appeared at one of
the Sixth ward precincts and began
abusing a respectable-looking citizen
who is supposed lo have plenty of mus
clo and knows how to use it. After the
rough had called him a liar, a thief,
robber and many other had names, a
citi.en edged around and queried:
"Why do you stand such insults from
that loafer? " Why don't you haul olf
and knock hirn flat ?"
"Policy - jiolicy!" whispered the oth
er. "He and 1 vole the same ticket. He
hasn't voted yet. If I should kno'-li
him down he'd turn his political coat
quicker' n w ink. You wait awhile."
In a few minutes the loafer deposited
his ticket, and soon after that he edged
around and said:
"I repeat, sir, that you are a rob
ber!" That was nil the repeating that he in
dulged in. A left-hander under tho ear
laid him out in a confused heap, and
when he came to, he said lie wanted to
It seems that the application of a
tuning-fork to the web of tho garden
spider will not only entice the insect
toward it, but oven cause the spider to
ad toward a fly drowned in a repulsive
substance as though the tly were alive
and without so disagreeable a sauce.
Ex-flov. Hullock, of Georgia, has
given over politics altogether, and in
terests himself only in his business.
Hois quoted :is mentioning the timo
and money bo had "lost" in tho execu
tive chair, and adding: "I was unfor
tunate enough ti) tie. elected (iovornor
of Georgia once. I never sought tho
office, and it was tho only one I ever
held. 1 have never been a politician; I
am simply a business man."
Tiik "London H.nr Color Restorer"
is the nio.-t delightful article every in
troduced to the American people and
totally ditl'eieiit I mm all other hair re
storers, being entirely lice from all
impure ingredients tliat render many
oilier articles for the hair obnoxious.
Where baldness, or falling of the hair
exist, or prematurely grayness, from
sickness or other causes, Us use will
restore the natural oulhful color, and
causes a healthy "row ill, clc unsing the
scalp from all impurities, ilindrul!', etc.,
nl the Mime time a most pleading and
lasting h.iir drcssiu;:, I'rtgnintly per
fumed, nndeiing the hair soft
and plyable, making it an indis
pensable in every toilet.
Ask yotii druggist for Puinloii nir Color
Restorer. Pi ice cents a buttle. (Ij
"Dtt. Si. i i.i it's Cm lu :m im i'" will en
sure you a oooil night's rest. It is the best
cough mcilii iiie in the market. Price 25
Wm. II. Pii. 1. 1, Fowleniile, Mich.,
mi s : I have tint n stcd
than I did last, night.
Pud" has helped nn
i ..ii.,,. r.. ii...
, ,.. I 11 III- Ml nisi
The "Only Lung.'
V"iidci fully, See
Cathartic or purgative pills do nioro
harm thnn good, Curler's Little Liver Pills
do only good, but a large amount of that.
Only one pill a do-e,
hen eve upon the first of men, the apple
pressed with specious cant,
Oh what a thousand pities then, that Adam
was not Ad.'incint,
Rut though by his false step, we were doom
ed, to life ol endless loil,
One certain comfort we can L'ct, to cure
Rheumatics, I'clectric ( lil.
Dr. Kline's Great Nerve Restorer is the
marvel of the age for nil Neive Discuses,
All (ils stopped Iii c. Send to Arch
street, Philadelphia, Pum.
Ik vol' want lo get rid ol pimples, boils,
teller, Ac, use ' Lindsey's Illoo I Scnicher."
Sold bv all druggists
Mas. W. N. P.i,M it, 1 !'. Morgan street,
Hiifl'alo, N. V., writes: My iliild was taken
rYbiiiiirv 1st witli Croup in its severest
lidin and Dr. Thomas' Eclectnc Oil being
the only remedy at bund, I began giving it
according to diiei lions and found it gave
immediate relict, I gave three (.S) doses and
the child rested well the remainder of the
night. I have used it in my family for
some time with complete success.
FACTS THAT WE KNOW.
If you aro HUlVeriug w ith a severe Cough,
C'uld, Asthma, llronchitis, Consumption,
loss of voice, tickling in the throat, or uy
HlVc.tionof the throat or lungs, wo know
Dit. Kino's Nihv Discovkiiv will give ytu
immediate relief. Wo know of hundreds
f cases it has completely cured, nud twt
where all other medicines had hilled, is a
other remedy can show .m-li M W
p,nlnent cures. Now lo give ' '
ftli v will cure you of Asthma, lhonchitis,
Hay Fever, consumption, revere Coughs
H,rc,ilds,ll.rness, or tjny Ihroat .r
Lung disease, if yeu will call at Geo. E.
O'lliim's drug store.Cniro Ills., you can got
a trial Ixittlo free of cost, or a regular siza
Uottlo fort 1.00 (2) :