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"O, coruo with mo!" cried tlio stovo-plpotiat,
As It danced o'er walk and suttcr.
"I can't come now," said tho brlmllo cut,
And ber heart was In n Mutter.
For wns elio not to mcot tho bold bootjack.
And tho bl(f brown Suit, and tho hoavy plaque,
And p-iperwolirht and tlieshot-irun truo,
And the pair of tonirs and tliu overshoe.
And tho unlit lamp, and the pot of Jatr,
And tho looe door knob, and tho llowlnjr dam,
As downward she went roaming
In tho irloainlnir.
"Why do you weep?" asked tho clarionet
Of tho sprinkling pot ono day ;
"I wep I weep" and tho tears fell fast"
"I wco tn hear you piny 1"
For the sprlnkllnif-pot, living next to
A bollows-luuKi'd man, who constantly blow
On tho clarionet with monotony
Had doar.dumb, blind and lachrymoso become,
From tho "tedle-tadlo-tco"
It could not Heel
Tackling the Old I.udy.
Mrs. Mulkittle it in the family room, hold
ing the new babv in that carcful-don't-break-it
kind of a way, of which mothers are the
originators ami a'l the balance of the world
imitators, when the incipient interviewer en
tered. "Put your hair out of your eyet, son. Where
have yoa been ? "
" Outen the lot."
"Come sit down. You'll run yourself into
a fever. I don't see, to save me, how boys
can stand it to be on the go all the time. My
son, you are getting old enough to exhibit
some signs ol maturer thought, but I never
saw the like; your lather has no patience
with you whatever. Hut he can go to Sunday
school and teach .other people's children
Never mind, son J mamma'll teach you "
" Mammi, was it Noah what built the big
boat I "
"Yes, Noah built the ark."
"Tell me about it."
" Well, the people got so bad that God was
sorry that he had made anybody. But Noah
was a good man and obeyed God's com
mands, and when God told Noah that he was
going to drown the people by a great flood,
Noah believed him, and when God told him
to build an ark, he went at once and began
the work. The people came around and
laughed at Noah, for they did not believe
that there was going to be a flood. At last,
when the ark was finished and two of every
thing, every kind ol animal and bird, and
Noah and his sons and th-ir wives and
children had gone in, the rain began to fall.
Oh, how it rained. The water kept rising
until the ark floated aud the people were all
The boy sat for a few minutes in deep med
itation. His mother began to congratulate
herself that he had been awakened to a sense
of seriousness, and was drawing a mental
draft ol what she would say to her husband,
when the boy looked up suddenly and said
"And did Noah have two fleas in the
"Yes, two of everything."
"Two grasshoppers? "
"Two elephants t "
" Oh, yes."
"Two buffalo gnats ? "
"Two preachers t "
"No, I don't think that there were two
" One would be enough, wouldn't he T
"Yes, I think so."
" Were there two nltti ! "
" Two nitts."
"Oh, don't be so foolish, Willie. You
know better than to talk that way."
" Were there two bumblebees' nests ?
"Yes, there were two bumblebees."
" Did they sting Noah T "
" I don't know."
" Why don't you know t "
"Because I don't know."
"Why don't you know why you don'
know ? "
"Now shut up, sir, and if I hear nnv more
out of you, I'll put down your little brother
and spank you. Never saw such a boy in
my life. I'd rather have the nettle rash."
The wily time a good rran should play
poker n when the kitchen fire needs a raking,
Even then it is liable to prove a losing game
unless he had previously provided the proper
mount of chips N. Y. Advertiser.
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Try it once ' and
to do so again.
How Oirls Study.
Did you ever see two girls get together to
study nfnn evenlngT I have, and it generally
goes like this:
"In 167J Marquette discovered the Missis
sippi. In 1673 Marquette dis . What did
you say, Ide? You had ever so much rather
see the hair coiled flun br.il'ed? Yes, sohad
I. It's so much more stylish, and then It
looks clasiic.il, too; but how do you like O,
earl I never will learn this lesson!
In 1863 Lifaycttr; discovered the Wiscon-
In l86, Lafayette discovered the well!
what's the matter with me, anyhow! In six
teen seventy-three Marquette discovered the
Mississippi. I don't cire if he did. I sup
pose the Mississippi would have got along
just as well if Marquette had never looked at
it. Now, see here, Ide, is there anything
about my looks that would give you to under
stand thit I know when Columbus founded
Jamestown, and how George Washington
won the battle of Shlioh? Of course there
sn't. History's a horrid study anyhow. No
use, either. Now, French U ever so much
nicer. I can introduce French phrases very
ften, and one must know I have studied the
language. What is the lesson to-morrow? O,
yes; conjugation of parier. Let's see, how
docs it commence? Fe pule, lu parte, 11 par
11 par ll well, il, then!
Conjugations don't amount to anything. I
know some phrases that are appropriate here
and there, and in most every locality; and
how's anybody going to know but what I
ave the conjugations all by heart?
Have I got my geometry? No, I'm just
going to study it. Thirty-nintth, is it not?
Let the tri-angle A B C, tri-angle A B
say, Ide, have you read about the Jersey Lilly
and Freddie? I think it is just too utterly ut,
and Freddie is simply gorgeous. I'm com-
letely crushed on him
Oh, this theorem!
Let the tri-angle A B C be right-angled at
B. On the side B C, erect the square B D'
On the side A B, the square A I. On the side
did I tell you sister Carracciola gave me a
new piece to-day, .1 sonata? It is really in
tense. The tones fairly stir my soul. I am
never coing to take anything but sonatis after
this. I got another new piece, too. Its name
Is Etudes. Isn't it funny? I asked Tom this
noon what it means, and he rays it is Greek
for nothing. It is quite apropos, for there Is
really nothing n it the same tiling over and
"Where was I? O, yes, the side A C, the
quare A c uraw tne line come on, lets
go at our astronomy. It s on 'Are the Plan-
Now, Ide, I think they are, and I have
thought about it a great deal. I banged my
hair last night. I wanted a Langtry bang just
too bad for any use, but pa raved, and I had
to give in. Yes, I think they are inhabited .
I should like to visit some of them, but you
would not catch me living in Venus. Eight
seasons! Just think how often wc would have
to have new outfits to kcp up with the styles.
What! yon are not going? I am so sorry,
but I suppose you are tiled. Iam. It always
makes me most sick to study a whole evening
like this. I think sister ought to give us a
And they go to school next morning and
tell the other girls how awfully hard they have
studied. Belle McDonald, in Chicago Tri
WIWUK Tilt! lHM'EUKXCi; WAS.
An Arkansas man had located in Texas on
a few rich acres and after a year or two of
Southern effort at farming got discouraged,
packed his household goods in a wagon and
started back to Arkansas. His dilapidated
team, consisting of a Mexican pony and a
Texas steer hitched together, were pulling
the load leisurely along the road, when he
met a neighbor, who saluted him.
"HelIoa, Clayton! Which way ?"
"I am going back to Arkansas."
"Oh, I am tired and discouraged. I can't
raise any crops here; the country ain't worth
a cuss for farming. It is altogether too hot."
"Well, Clayton, this man seems ta have
mighty fine crops," said the neighbor, point
ing to a neat house and the clean, tidy-looking
acres surrounding it, that were carrying a
fine stand of different kinds of small grain.
"Yes, that is so," said the Arkansas trav
eler, "but, d n it, Perkins, that man Is a.
Dutchman," Philadelphia Press,