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. . i. o.i tue jjers, if yon will
go straight home to-night after the stole
closes. Don't be afraid to trmt m. Thai.
known for some tima the joke was to lie
played, but supposed all the time it was to be
next Friday. As it is to be to-night this is
me only way to let you know. So please ex
cme haste, as I am writing this in the post-
uiucc. ouririeaii, Lirrxis Kurt.
Mr. H. wisely took the fair one's advice
and went home. Subsequently he received
the following letter :
Deur Mr. II. ;
San Antonio, Texas. -1 suppose you
was somewhat surpri.ed when you received
that note last Friday, and I muit ask you
agin to please excuse me. I knnw it was
vciy wrong, but I was not acquainted with
any of the clerks, s.i I thought I would not
be recognized, and I could not bear the idea
of the C. L. Ds. getting ahead of us and
playing a joke on you. We determined to
prevent it and did so, though it cost us mote
than we had bargained for how, it does not
matter. I'icase accept our sincere thanks frr
jour promptness in obeying our wishes, be
cause I was afraid you would think we were
trying to keep you from keeninr
and would not do as the note asked. I am
atraid you think very hard of inc, but it was
me only way to prevent it. You bee, we
knew all about the joke and intended to give
you timely warninir.but the C. L I). ihr.i.i
to steal a nnrch on us by playing it a week
uueau oi time, and it just happened I was
down town that day and received a waining
myscn, saying it I wished to prevent the j ike
ucui; piayeu wo would have to act at once. I
am a very poor hand to deicrih nnii.in..
but I wdl try and give you some idea how the
joke was carried out. There are two differ
ent clubs known as the C. L. Ds. Now one
club is composed of ladies and gentlemen.
They do nothing at all and never get up any
rackets; but the other club is composed of all
gentlsnen and it keeps us busy watching
them. They knew which wav v,.m ,..i.i ..
that night, and this is what they did : One of
me gjnnemen being very small, dressed up
in a suit of ladies' clothes and pretended to
be in dreadful trouble. Of coursj when you
passed you would, as a gentleman, ask the
cause of her trouble and offer 10 assist her.
Now, we knew all about that, and one of our
girls dressed up in gentlemen's clothes and
represented you. When we thought it was
time for the store to close we were all ready
and our bogus "Mr. II." started the way you
was tog and had not proceeded very far
wcn ne, or sne, I should say, met a young
lady who seemed in be in dreadful trouble,
sobbing as though her heart would bleak, as
was only natural.
Mr. H. askei if he could be of any assist-
wnen me supposed young lady informed
him she had lost her way, being a stranger in
the city, she had taken the wronj street and
could not find her way back. Mr. II. said he
would be only too happy to see her home if
she could tell where she lived. So she said
she lived near San Pedro avenue. The gen
tleman that was playing lady did not suspect
lor a moment the good-looking youna man he
was talking to was a lady, but just al!oed
himself to be taken in like a limb, all the time
thinking what a joke they wete playing on
poor Joe II. Mr. II. proposed that they
should have some ice-cream, as the lady
seemed so warm, and led the way to a place
where four of the Jolly Six were waiting for
them-twooftheeirls dressed as m-ml....
the other two as ladies. There is whtre the
fun commenced. The young lady had given
her name as Iiitella Thare, and Mr. H . Intro
duced us, but all the time pretended to be sur
prised to see us there. Now the supposed
lady seemed to fall in love with me to such an
extent that she nearly forgot the part he
..u i,jjm uvi.cvc me your friend,
riemi, .. ; 1 ' " .
It Ji Roiuowbat like u
But If You Wish To
Dry Goods, Boots,
... ...nv nuii;. i ujL'lir UUIOr 1111(0,
J'eaoooka Hlioiild "mlilu," though tWaro
Tlie dmlound masher "rakot the uulco."
I in 1 1 road Work.
JunuSS: Forwanlod -fl ours of woal, 2 of
lioraw.8 or merohiiiidUo. Itwmlvud-10 oars
orooal, 4orirnlii,iorinnrkew, 3 of oil, 1 or
Iron plp-a, 6 or Hour, ID or iiiurolitndlM.
Jiini'S): Korpriloil-B oaraof honeg, 2 or
oeivoii 7 oars of 'iriok, tu of iioroimiidl. S or
v r, j or mil, i or ooke. 1 or lumber, 1 of hay.
..in.. : K .i w ird U-a rnn of haj4of ami,
.l i p i Ii in. I m: Iti-clsa.i -la on of tumor.
- i.i liln.il. i ,if uiuil, mi., .i inu froluht.
.Illl.:..l. fr,. I Will dill SuMM.if ilvu tiok, 1
ii ' i"' !'"'" " "f inorulmudw.
. .V. V' ","1."' il or lumber.
1 or laths 1 ol Bltitiwluit.
Woiiiuii'it r.nltlun In Uourtln.
A man's quest of a spouse ii limited only
by his time and opportunities for looking
around. He can try; to win anybody, al
though a reasonable chance of success may
attend him with but few. At any rate he
standi equrrely up.,n his cheek and his mer
its, and that is enough. On the contrary, so
ciety say that a woman must never go a step
out of her way to secure the best and most
desirable of mankind. She must simply sit
and wait until tome chance brings the longed
for oniioitunitv of soeahinL-. In f,. it I.
said that young ladies pride themsslves upon
feeling as well as seeming indifferent to all
men until an eflbit is made to awaken their in
terest. No wonder social refermers protest.
If young maidenhood did not so often (all a
victim to the first fight of Cupid's darts, its
ranae of ch nee would still be verv small. A.
they go, rich an i poor, pretty and homely, in
telligent and ignorant, probably women
woum not, it tuey accepted none ol them, re
ceive on an average more than half n dozen
offer apiece, and not over three of these rea
sonably eligible. Suppose that she is form
nate enough to win a score of suilors, a youag
lady is still lerr'blr haodicapjied. Like
enough none of the 20 would be just to her
liking, and meanwhile ope she greatly pre
ferred to nny of the others might just escape
coming under tho sp of htr charms. It is
allyery pretty, but this sitting in "maiden
metlitati .n fancy free," until some stray youth
makes a igorous elTirt to aep'ive the aforc
aaid fancy ol its l.herty, is a rery unsatisfac
tory thing whin crit cally examined. I'ro
bahly it may never be advisable to put women
on an exact equably wiili man and let her go
forth with a -.lock ol caramels and valentines
to her ideal. anA ,mr il.. ,,n urr
you don't succeed, try, try again," to a prac
tica test. At all event, anything ol that
kind is far in the future. If, however, man is
to be robbed nflil lim-.l,,,,, ,..,1 ' .i...
or forced to share them on even terms, we
imuii)i suomii mac auequate attention
lie fflVBH til llil imn,.n.. .,Un. ! .
ship. s" ,-uu"-
William Tavlor. of ttock Crppt v s. -
lucky man. He hai discovered a mountain
of na'tiral soap laree onour-h in !,... .1,-
wholt human race clean for all tbne. Not
only is this excellent product smrmil, f!,m
and eniolicnt, but it possossei some pecular
quauiy wmcn makes it the deadliest foe to
dirt and nrMw .v nt u 1... . .
; me muiKei, anil
the owntr ciotrlently expects that it will out-
, r,T. arucie warranted by Tosh
lid inui "tn tk th n- 1. J, ' .
three days. " - uo ln
Next thine to a bov oinc tr it,. ,
purchase 25 cents worth of beefsteak and
knocking down to cents, is tin- nhi .a.
of borrowing the gov'nor's knife in hopes
lliat adime wl'l be l.dged between the blade
and the hmdle. The writer has borrowed
the gov's knife 20 limes a day, some days, in
1-- " k "i ne or nan Uline. It
wasn't had fiahin.r lll, . 11
youth can easily rke fifty'cenU o7$iPco per
day, providing he has a daddy who is some
what loose with his change. Vmembe?, in
vn ,BLl"S1S.Che?,f' '"'I'rovea failure, un ess
you have the right kind of a daddy. Much
depends on the daddy in the case.-Gip