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SCHOOLBOY OF THE FUTURE. Alter ie Has Ran the Gauntlet of Prescribed Interrogations He May Begin to Learn. Teacher (to appiicunt for admnission) Johnnie, have you got a certificate of vac eination? '"Yes, sir." "Have you been innoculated for croup?" "Yes sir." "Had your arm scratched with cholera bacilli ?" "Ye, sir." 'ave you a-written guarantee that you are proof against whooping cough, measles, mumpps and old age?" "Yes, sir." "Have you your own private drinking 'Yes, sir." "Do you promise not to exchange sponges with the boy next to you, and never use any but four own pencil?' "Yes sir." "Will you agree to have your books fumi gated with sulphur and sprinkle your clothes with chloride of lime once a week?" "Yes, sir." "Johnnie, you have met the first require ments of the modern sanitarium, and ma' now climb into a seat and forthwith begin to learn."-N. Y. World. Comforting -Poor Papa. A well-known business man whose head is bare, yet who wears a luxuriant growth of whiskers was being railed recently for being bald by some of his intimate friends in the presence of his small daughter. Lit tle Mabel didn't understand that it was all in jest, and crawling upon her parent's lap put her arms about his neck and turned defiantly toward his tormentors: "My papa w'ud ruvver hav' his top hair on his chin, w'udn't you, papa?"--Chicago Chronicle. New rule of the Don't Worry club: If you are hungry, don't try not to worry about it, bunt- ty to get something to eat.-Atchison Globe. LIEUTENANT PETERSON Says Peruna is The Finest Topic And Invigorator He Ever Used. Lieutenant Charles Peterson, Hook And Ladder Co, No. 21, writes the followin let ter to ,The Peruna Medicine Co., from 627 Belmont avenue, Chicago, IIl.: "Last year I had a severe attack of la grippe which lefIt me very weak, so that I was unable to perform my duties. Several of my friends advised .me to' buii4 up on Peruna, and J found it by far the finest tonic and invigorator I had ever used. In twb weeks I was Ronsg and well and if ever a m 4~ Od t unusual hardship incident Iy uties at fires, I take a dose or two S and t ed that it keeps me in good h eIt. ." : Charles Peterson. Lieut. Chas, Peterson. The abor.e i only onse of flifty thou uad lettehrs we have on file attest. haso the k srIt of Peorun. T1here are a great multitude of people fn all art of the land who have entirely lost their hldalth as a result of la grippe; who 'have 'recovered from an attack, but find themaelvea with weakened nerves, deranged digestion, and with but very little of their formei owet. : STh~r. is no disease known to man that 'leives the system in such an outrageous and -xasperating condition as la grippe. For this class of sufferers, Peruna isa spe eific. Peruna should be taken acoording to directions and in a few weeks the sufferer will be entirely restored to his accustomed beallth. Address The Peruna Medicine Co., Colum pus, 0., for a free copy of "Facts and Faces." ABSOLUTE SECURITY, Cenuine Carter's Little Liver Pills. MuSt Bear Signature of OI EOR C TIATIEU. F-R l ThUOMllUO J .,,or i utow inm . : - OURESIGKHEADACH!. RS OF WRIS PAPSM sEwI1ntUL &o BMUT-AtEIN ·ALbS57e8TiRrIPTOR MIMTATtONBt 'San earRt IN HARBOR. The ship's in the harbor-the white sails are furled; Weary the voyage from over the world; Weary the tossing on billowy foam; But the captain is glad, and the sailors sing "Home!" Home at last From the wave and the blast, Home at last-at last! The ship's in the harbor-at anchor she lies Under the stars of the shadowless skies, Safe from the seas where the solemn wrecks roam, And captain and sailors are singing of home. Home at last From the wave and the blast, Home at last--at last! The ship's in the harbor from ocean's black nights; The shore bell# rang sweetly, and Love's were'the lights! And fairly they twinkled far o'er the white foam The lights in the beautiful windows of home. Home at last From the wave and the blast, Home at last-at last! Oh, ship, safe in harbor for all the long Ycars, Are you freighted with love-are you freighted with tears? Do you bring to my soul from the storm and the foam, The lips that sing love and the heart that makea home? Home at last Aftcr wave and the blast Home at last-at last! -F. L. Stanton, in Atlanta Constitution. SHard Luck i By W. Bert Foster. 16 NOW, that's what I call a down right shame," exclaimed Mliton liarey, to his fellow-clerk. .Ned Steele. "Old Bowes has more cheek than 1 gave him credit for. To think of his asking you to teach that youhg nephew of his the business, which means your walk ing ticket sure, as soon as he learns! I wouldn't do it!" "It is rather hard luck," replied Ned, his voice trembling a little. "He knows just howmuch I need the money; and even if he were going to discharge me, he needni't have: asked me to :spend a fortnight or more teaching Charlie Page all I know about the work." "It's taking the bread right out of your mouth," said the older clerk, in dignantly. "Young Page don't need it, either. 'If I were you, ŽHed; I'd skip, and let the old man teach his nephew him self. No one can do your work as you do it,.anyway." "I shall be on the lookout for another job. Work's pretty scarce, you know. and it's bard enough living on six dol lars a week now." "You're right, Ned. I don't see how you do it. Why, I can't live half de cent on $50 a month, and I've no one to look after but myself." "Yet mother and Nan and I have got along very well so far, and probably there'll be a way opened," said Ned. cheerfully, as he turned to his desk. "Well. you're a wonder to me," mut tered Milton. Young Hartley. could not, and prob ably never would, understand the mean iLg of economy. He spent all he had and found that far from enough, al though his income was twice that of Zled Steele. Hartley was head clerk when Ned en tered the employ of Bowes & Co., nearly a year before. and Ned had taken what tire boys-eall "a shine" to the flashily dressed and careless young man of the world.` Not. that Ned-,was led into the theie rtain4y que.tiot~ble.company in which Mi:ton Hartley shone; but he almired from a distance. 'Their lives were entirely different. alnd always would be, Ned told himself. I[e ;lad a niothef'and little sister to help support,' and such pleasures as his fellow-clerk indulged, in were not for him. "Hard luck! that's what it is," he thought. as he leaned over his books. Only that noon Mr. Bowes had called his youngest clerk into the private of 1'ee. and shooting a piercing glance over his gold-bowed spectacles at Ned. as was his habit when talking, said, sternly: "Mr. Steele, my nephew, Charles Page. will be here next Monday morn ing, and I wish you to feath him your work thoroughly. [ intend to make some changes here asortly. <That is all." That was all; but it meant everything to Ned-more than he had even let Mil ton know; and now, as he bent low over the page of his ledger, two great tears sp:ashed down on the neat rows of fig ures, and he dashed his hand across his eyes, and bit his lip in vexation at this little weakness. r "Hard luck!" he muttered, ashe went home to supper; and it was a very grave Ned Steele that entered the lit tle house that evening. When little Nan had been put to bed, N:d told his mother the bad news, and received the comfort tihat t kind, Chris tian mother always has for her boy. "Keep up your courage, my son," she said. as Ned kissed her good night. "Maybe' godod will come out of your 'hard luck.' " "I wish Icould think so," replied :Ned. True to promise, Mt'. Bowes intro duced Charlie Page into the office the following Monday morning, and it was well he did, for Milton did not make his appearance all day, and even a "green hand" was some help. Mr. Bowes went about with a face like a thunder-cloud, and it was none the less -dark when Milton came in the next day, as cootand placid as ever. Mr. Bowes' sharpest reprimand never ruf fled the serenity of his head clerk. Charlie Page and Red had been school friends before Ned's father died; but Charlie's warinth of frien(dship was considerably chilled by his old school mate's very apparent coldness. "I wonder what it can be~ that's changed Ned so."A.mased Charlie, en tirely innoeent of any such thoqught as fisplacing his foirmeri school-ehbm. But as lied's stiffness rather in creased than diminished, Charlie gaive him up entirely, determined that "he would show Ned Steele that his friend lship couldn't be Fefused Atdi.e"' So. uanderdte existing circumstances, they had anjything but a jolly time of it tfn ~5owes & Co.'s office, with $ed grow ing more stiff and solemn evet'y'ay. Milt's absence becoming msneornd more frequeteuti the'pi·op-r s face like a stort&-Ioud' from one week's end to another. Giving up yed in disgust, Charlie t~isg ~i~tt~~iid tB~ie-io~$i~~y and soon an acquaintance sprang up between them that boded no good for Mr. Bowes' nephew. Unlike Ned, he not only admired Milton. but he longed to imitate him, at least in some things. In fact, Charlie wanted to be "a man of the world." He eagerly accepted Mil ton's invitation, one day given, to "Come downtown to-night, Page, and ['11 teach you billiards, if you'd like to learn." Ned Ic eked upquickly from his work, and almost spoke the warning that was at his tongue's end. But the thought: "It's none of my business," kept him silent. Conscience, however, gave him no peace; so as they were closing up for the night, he said: "Charlie, don't you go with Milt to night. Your uncle won't like it." "Is that any of your business?" snapped Charlie. who knew very well that his uncle would be far from pleased at such an escapade. "Don't give your advice, Steele, till it's called for." Ned turned on his heel and left. angry with himself for speaking, yet knowing that Charlie was just entering a path that would be certain ruin to such an impulsive, head-strong fellow. "It's nothing to me-none of my busi ness." said Ned, savagely, thinking of the hard luck Charlie's presence in the office would bring him. "Are you too tired to take the work I've finished' over to Mrs. Coles for me after tea, Ned?" was Mrs. Steele's gen tle inquiry, during the meal. "Not at all, mother," was Ned's cheerful reply; and so he set out, im mediately after his appetite was satis fled, for the long tramp across the city Though cheerful before his mother. Ned's thoughts were far from pleasant as he walked on through the almost deserted streets. Now and then fine carriages dashed past him, and he longed to be like the occupants- wealthy. If he only had money enough to live in a big house as Mr. Bowes did, oz like Charlie's folks, he'd ride in a car riage, too, and-but this unprofitable reverie was cut short by his arriva: at Mrs. Coles'. He delivered the work and turned again toward home. Two figures passed before him out of a brilliantly lighted billiard room and separated on the corner. "Good night, Charlie. Guess you can get home all right," Ned heard Milton Hartley's voice say. "The air will do your head good. It was confounded hot in there, that's a fact." "Won't you come a little way with a fellow?" said the other, leaning un steadily against the lamp-post. "That stuff I had made me terribly dizzy." "Oh, that'll be all right in a few min utes. I must be off. Gdod night." "Scound ee!" exclaimed Ned, as Hartley turned the corner. Then he stepped forward and grasped Charlie's arm. "Come on home, Page. I'll help yOU." "Is that you, Steele?" said Charlie, thickly. "Let go of my arm. I can get along without your help. Let go, I say." He - wrenched away from Ned ann staggered half across the street, but slipped', and fell all in a heap, too con fused for a moment to move. A car riage turned the corner, and had Ned not pulled him back in the nick of time, in all probability the foolish fel low would have been killed. It was all done in a flash-the fall, the rush of hoofs, Ned's plucky action -then Ned Steele found himself lying on the edge of the sidewalk, feeling a little faint and with a badly-wrenched ankle. Mr. Bowes was bending over him, and Cha'rlie Page sat on the curb stone beside him, now thoroughly so bered. "Help me into the carriage with him, Charlie." said Mr. Bowes, huskily. "Had it not been.for him I probably should have run over and killed my own nephew.'" In his uncle's library, with Ned stretched on the sofa beside him, Char lie made a clean breast of the affair, and was, freely forgiven. And Ned, after some urging, explained his own conduct toward his former schoolfel dow. "Why, did you think that I had any intention of discharging you, Ed ward?" said Mr. Bowes. "My inten tion was to discharge Milton Hartley, and give you his position as soon as Charlie was capable of doing your work. You are fully competent, my boy, so Hartley goes to-morrow, and Edward Steele will be head clerk for Bowes & Co." This was good news indeed, and when Ned kissed his mother, before he left home to take his seat for the first time at Milt's old desk. he said. laughingly: "It was all a mistake about my hard luck, mother. I'll never cry out again before I am hit." And he never did.-Golden Days. They Piled It On. "They do things their own way up in New England," said the tramp on the park bench as he gazed at a big toe peeping through his shoe. "Far instance, up in New Hampshire I was crossing a field when a bull took after me. As he was about to pick me up on his horns I dodged, and he went full against a tree and broke" his neck." "Well, what was done?" was asked. "Why, they arrested me for tres; pass. On top of that they charged me with inciting a bull to mischief. Then I was held for the worth of the bull. and before they got through with me I was in jail for 11 months. I'd got another montrh if there hadn't been a slip. When the bull broke his neck the farmer's wife fainted away, and they meant to tack on 30° days more, to pay the farmer for her lost time while unconseious."-Chicago Daily News. How They Would Get Eves The grand duke of Mecklenburg wa. 3ne day gambling at the Doberan ta. ale, and was betting on the same num Hers as a rich master petter who stood` .ext to him. Both having lost their money, the grand duke inquired: 'Well, potter, what shall we do now?" 'Oh," replied the master potter, "your aighness * 11 screw up the taxes and I shall make pots!'-San Franc'io Ar P la n ati1 P.il C u4 isT ueopnyFfud, yYu ecan~ch o r~?`IceS DOES MUCH DAMAGE. Oyster Shell Bark Louse Is a Parasa Dreaded by Gardeners and Fruit Growers. The scientific name is Mytilaspis Po monum. In our illustration "a" is a female scale from beneath, filled with eggs; :"b," the same from above; "c,4 twig infested by female scales; "d," male scale and a twig infested there with. The insect is so named because of the resemblance that the scale bears to a long, rather narrow oyster, and I I OYSTER SHELL BARK LOUSE. this renders it easily recognizable. The cast skins of the larvae are at the narrow end of the scale and form its head. The female comes to ma turity during the latter part of Au gust, fertilization having taken place in the earlier portion of the same month, and egg-laying continues into September, when the entire space be low the scale will be found filled with minute, pale yellow eggs; something over 100 in some cases, though often much less. These eggs remain dur ing the winter protected by the scales, and from them hatch the crawling larvae in early June. Growth is slow; there is only one brood, and, when not excessively abundant, the insect does not do much injury. As a matter of fact, however, it does often become excessively abundant, and lilacs, for instance, may become so covered that no portion of the bark can be seen between the scales. The male scales are about one-sixteenth of an inch long, and the female about double that length. Walnut and butternut trees are very suscep ible to the attacks of this spe cies, and are sometimes killed even when of considerable size. Among fruit trees apples are the most sus ceptible and branches are occasionally destroyed. Young trees may be killed in some instances, but old trees are rarely much harmed. Of the shade trees willow and maple are sometimes severely injured. The remedy is to spray with kero sene emulsion when the larvae are hatching, at which time they are killed by even a weak solution. Farmers' Review. Black Breeds Are Unpopular. That the black varieties are not more generally popular is due prin cipally to the prejudice against them as- dressed poultry. Consumers of poultry object to dark legs, to white skin and to dark pin feathers in the carcass. Now, a prejudice of this kind has to be reckoned with and consid ered by the poultryman, and it must be taken at its face value. There is no way of discounting it, Further more, a poultryman is safe in taking it at its present lue, for there is not the least likeli ood of its chang ing within a generltion.---Farm Pdul try. _ Oatmeal is an excellent feed for young fowls that have not wholly feathered before winter. Bought by the barrel it is not expensive. For Infants and Children. The Kind You Have ;A. no +:.oo............ Always Bought Ayegetable PreparationforAs similating.theFood andi eula ting theStomacs adB ls o Bears the SignLture PromotesDigestion.Cheerful ness andRest.Contains neither ,Morphine nor'ineral. UA OTARC OTIC. _ .as, did +Us Aperfe t Remedy forConstipa - Us ion, Sour Stosmach,Diarrhioea WormsConvulsions,Feverish- F ness and LosS or SLEP.r Uer Pac Simile Signature or Thirty Years EA COPY OF WRAPPER.CASTORI 1 4 e ' aK e coaT . I U NV. V . The Oldest Banknote. 1 This note is in the possession of the Bank of England. It is dated December 19, 1699, and'-is for 555 pounds, but on'account of its aGe same is made very valuable. One of4the o est and most valuable.tomaelth medcines 'before the public is Hostetter's Stomach Bit ters. For the past fifty years it has been the standard of such remedies for dyspepsia, in digestion, biliousness, nervousness or in somnia. It will effect a cure when fai-4ully Usual Way. Bobbs-Too bad about Nobbs. Lost all of his yrniture becayse of a false alarm f firefstbii housew Dobbs-But if there was no fire how coukl ris furniture be destroyed? "W1ll foufsee, Nobbb lives in a suburban town where they have a volunteer fire de partment."-Baltimore American, $100 Reward $100. - 'he readers of this paper will be pleased to learn that, there is at -least one.dreaded disease that science has been 4ble to cure in all its stages, and that is Catarrh. Hall's Catarrh Cure is the only positive cure known to the medical fraternity. Catarrh being a constitutional 'disease, requires a constitutional treatment. Hall's Catarrh Cure is taken internally, acting directly u.pon the blood.and mucous surfaces of the system, thereby destroying .the foundation of the disease, and giving -the patient strength by building up the constitution-and assisting nature in doing its work. The proprietors have so much faith in its cura tive powers that they offer One Hundred Dollars for any case that it fails to cure. Send for list of testimonials. Address F. J. Cheney & Co., Toledo, O. Sold by Druggists 75c . Hall's Family Pilfs are the beat. Ungrateful Man. "I must get a new tailaw," said Goslin. "Your clothes seem to fit," commented Gurley. "Oh, they fit; but the beggaw actually wants to be paid faw them."-Detroit Free Press. Best for the BoweLs. N:o matter what ails you, headache to a cancer, you will never get well until your bowels are put right. Cascarets help nature. cure you without a gripe or pain, product easy natural movements, cost you just 1b cents to start getting your health back Cascarets Candy Cathartic, the genuine ,pu: up in metal boxes, every tablet has C. C. C. atamped on it. Beware of imitations. An Accretion. "Well, sir," said the slangy man, "he made me look like 30 cents." "You ought not to complain about that, for it is an improvement." "What do you mean?" "Ordinarily you look like a nickel."- Detroit Free Press. The Censas of 1900. A booklet giving the population of all cities of the United States of 25,000 and over according to the census of 1900, has just been issued by the passenger depart ment of the Chicago, Milwaukee & St. Paul Railway; and a copy of it may be obtained by sending your address, with two-cent stamp to pay postage, to the General Passen ger Agent of the Chicago, Milwaukee & St. Paul Railway, Chicago, Ili. Powers Confer. "Ah," knused Mr. Henpeck, as his' wife ana mother-in-law began a discussion with the cook, "the conference ef the powers has begun."' en this case, also, it was over the partition of China.-Baltimore American. The Best\Prescription for Chills and Fever is a bottle of GRovE's TsraiLES s COmL Tome Itis simplyiron and quininein atasteless form. No cure-no pay. Price,5Oc. ulnman Refrigerators. - }coax-Cremation is a thing of the past in the e:assical precincts of Boston. Soax-Because why? "Because of the expense. It requires too much heat to reduce a Bostonian to ashes."-Chicago Daily News. Sweat and fruit acids will not discolor goods dyed with PUTNAM FADELESS DYES. Sold by all druggists. If it was not for the Australian ballot sys tem a good many men would not make their. mark in this world.r-Indianapolie News. Primley's California Fruit Gum contains theenost delicious qualities of western fruits. "A thief stole all the harness from my i stable last night!" "Didn't he leave a trace?"-St. Louis Republic.. To Cure a Cold in OneDay Take Laxative Bromo Quinine Tablets. All lruggists, efund money if itfails to cure. 25c. Customer at cigar counter, buying a weed -"This is too dark." "Here is -a cigar lighter'."--St Louis Raipublie. - Piso's Cuifor Consumption is an inalli ble' remedy for coughs and colds.-N. W. Samuel, Ocean Grove, N. J., Feb. 17, 1900. - Of all t1e practices of love, praise is the most treacherous.-Chicago Daily News. When a cheerful, brave and light-hearted woman is. sd denly plunged into that perfection of misery, the blues, it is a sad picture. It is usually this way: She has been feeling out of sorts for some time, experl. encing severe headache and backache; sleeps very poorly and is exceedingly nervous. Sometimes she is nearly overcome by faintness, dizzi ness, and palpitation of the heart; then that bearing-down feeling is 'dreadfully-.wearing. Her husband says, "Now, don't get the blues I You will be all right after you have taken the doctor's medicine." But she does not get all right. She grows: orse day by day, until all at once she realijes that a distressing female complaint is established. Her doctor has made a mistake. - She loses faith; hope vanishes " then comes the morbid melancholy, everlasting blues. -Sie should have been tbld just what the trouble was, but probably she withheld some information from .the doctor, 'who, ýtherefore, is unable 4to accurately locate her particular illness. Mrs. Pinkham has relieved thousands of women fro just this kind of trouble, and now retains their grateIue letters in her librayas proof of the great assistanceshehas rendered them. This same as awaits every sick woman in the land. Mrs. WhIlfred Allender's Letter. " DEa Mae. PanaAx:--I feel it my to write and tell you of the benefit I have reetved nm y6r wonderful remedies. Before teting Lydia E. ham's Vogetable Compound, 1 was a miseryto my self and every one around me. I sufaered terrible pain in my back, head, and right side, was very nervnus,wouldcryforhours. Menssritrouald aer sometimes in two weeks, then again Rot for three or four months. I was so tired and weak, could not ,. 1 sleepnights, sharp paine would dart through my I-heartthat would almost cause..e tofall "My pother eoaxed me to try. Lydia El Plnkham's Vegetable Compound. I had no faith in it,fut to pl her I did so. The first bottle helped' me so much that I continued its use. I am nowwell and MRS.WINIR LLe weiN h more the n oi ever did In myli."--MR-S. EARD ,FarminthnAaR which n tn ptid any person ho can h the WoG testimonial I. not gennor was before obtaining the wirs it eca wipal on-JTn z . Pass Paanacen Co. Dr. Bull's Cough Syrup and Bronchitis in a few days. Whr then risk Cousumption! fhsethedealer'ssubstitute. Itis notas good as Dr. Bul'. CHRISTMAS IS COMS-SAV OtUlR FOR AlRoDAY.. EASIMAN'S PRICE . O.00. fretor IflUUA iiiievn .PARMA^CI l.ueJUI. A. JUI KIND,.,..PLITLE ROOK, ARi. SWE PAY EXPE3SS #AtbS ON AR- ALL OOODS ORDERED FROM VS zr r YO: I IsanarZa .aTw exams An edition of 10,000 Copies of Our 1 U|lU. long as they last they will be.lslg l BIM 'o all WRho lwrite bor therm. The Catalogue ia Illur'trnted Wi.bh 20 ne~,t10l.q Wat.__ Jewelry. Planondsa, sivrwrem, salt Novelties for X'MAS CfIFT8 FROIt 2t5oTO $00. YOU can not buy judciouslyawithout ilt. Sena your name in promptly. MERMOD & JACCARD JEWELRY e0d. Broadiway&Ls mt St., St.e I.. WALTHAM WA'CHES The best and most reliable timekeepers made in this country or in any other. " The Perfecded Amedrcan Watch ", an IsrasMtd ooted of interesting Informailon about watches, 'erui he sent Fee upon request, American WIaliham Watch Company, Waltham, Mass. W9'F ICAE CHEW SMOKE both local and constitgoist oswatmoaL P .ar btable a Ifor onetmon ot's , $1,pM.Bb B S D IARDU N CIEZEICAL CO.. I as.E. of draglais. mllx WRsrrh Ye AUT RTIU $ VI.S. aft" ".t t. 7eu w M. AiwFMw amet 33 a bm pfleS - IN. Er 184