Newspaper Page Text
Monday, January 3, 1910.
Ktbllsbed April, 1S8L The El Faso
succession. The Dally News, The Telegraph, Xfie Telegram, xae xnouno,
The Graphic, The Sun, The Advertiser. The Independent,
The Journal, The Republican. The Bulletin.
MEMBER. ASSOCIATED PRESS AJfD AMER. NEWSP. PUBLISHERS' ASSOC.
Katered at the El Paso Postofflce for Transmission at Second Class. Botes.
&c&23Ctod to the service cf the people, that no good cause ch&tt lack a chsJii
Dion, and that eril shall not thrive unopposed.
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DIi7 Herald, per month. 60o; per year. ?7- Weekly Herald, per year. ?2.
The Dally Herald lo delivered by carriers In EI Paoo. Bast jul Paso, Fort
Klise an- Towne, Texas, and Cludad Jvarez, Mexico, at 60 cents a month,
A subscriber desiring: the address on his paper changed will please state
fa hlz communication both the okl and the nw address.
Subscriber failing to gat The Herald promptly should call at the office or
Uley&one No. 115 before :30 p. zn. All complaints "will receive prompt atten-
1 1 WlUW I
Yle Herald bases
12 advert! sing
contracts on a.
more than twice
the circulation of
any other El
Kew Mexico or
west Texas pa-er.
Y Asseexfc&na of Anwsrfcaa 2
Arsrnsers iiu exassned sea csftised to 4
ixa arcalihaa of nSu
exact of such cr&nnaaboa is on file at the J
New York ofoss of &s Aasodadasu N 4
To Rio Grande Street Owners
COLLECTIONS begin today on account of the Rio Grande street parking. It is
highly important that this fund be made np without delay and turned over to
the city so that the construction work can begin.
The paving work will be held back at least until the street is graded and the
new curbing put in on the new line established on account of the parking. The
grading and curbing cannot go forward until the park fund is completed.
Almost all of the property owners have signed up for the parking on this street;
the exceptions are very few indeed, and most of these owners will no doubt come
into the plan eventually.
The first cost covering all the construction work on the parking, including the
new curb and the water service, will be only .85c per foot abutting on the street.
Each property owner will have to pay in the amount prorata upon his property at
this rate before the city will undertake the work of construction. The entire sum
necessary to pay the first cost must be in the hands of the city before the park
commissioner will be instructed to go ahead with the work.
The committee of property owners will have to spend much time and effort in
collecting this fund, and the individual property owners will greatly facilitate clos
ing up this matter and completing the improvement of the street, if they will vol
untarily remit to the treasurer of the committee the amount they have subscribed
at the rate of 85c per foot abutting on the street.
If this fund is quickly made up and the park commissioner enabled to go for
ward with his part of the work without delay, tthere is no reason why the first
summer should not show some satisfactory results of the parking. Of course it
will take a little longer time to get the trees well started; but the grass and
shrubbery ought to make a fine showing after even one season of cultivation.
Everything is in shape now to go forward as soon as the fund subscribed by
property owners is collected and turned over to the city.
It is not always easier to give advice than to take it; not if the person giving
the advice recognizes responsibility in the matter. In that event it is oftentimes a
greater task to give advice than to receive it
Just because Abe Ruef is under so many indictments for fraud and bribery and
Other things, a San Francisco court dismissed a suit of the former San Franciso
boss against a woman for $15,000 for services. That was mean of the court, for
Abe, if he ever needed money, needs it now.
Los Angeles has just driven two men out of the city for attempting to sell a
machine which they declared would turn .out counterfeit money. They attempted
to sell their'machine to a city detective, whom they took for a greenhorn.
A dispatch says one of president Taft's aids has decided that he will beat the
president at golf on the next holiday. It will probably not be much of a holiday
for him if he beats his chief.
The International encyclopedia says when you drink sulphate of copper you
should take an emetic at once. But we go right on eating green peas made green
with this stuff and never think of an emetic, although our stomachs may be think
ing things that we do not know about The greener the pea, the better it looks,
but the worse it is for the health in these days of preservatives and colorings.
Advertising Keeps On Working
ADVERTISING oftentimes brings results long after it has been scattered.
Only this week a letter came to The Herald inquiring for lands in the;
vicinity of El Paso and stating that the writer had been attracted to this"
section through an address delivered by El Paso's delegate to the Dry Farm con
gress in Cheyenne, Wyoming in February, 1909, almost a year ago.
This same address has in the past year brought letters from all parts of the
globe. Part of the El Paso delegate's address was reprinted. in the report of sena
tor McColl, to the government of Australia, and extracts from it have been going
the rounds of the press the entire year.
Many people, when they fail to get results from the first effort at advertising,
give up in disgust, but advertising is something that keeps on working, when done
in the right way.
It is always said of a storm that it is sweeping, yet it -never cleans up any
thing; on the contrary it .generally Utters up the face of the earth.
ALos Angeles masher had his skull broken. It must have taken an awful
blow to break a masher's skulL but it wouldn't take much of a vessel to hold his
A preacher said all actresses, artists' models, ana women bridge players were
going to the devil, and the men listeners fervently responded, 0, death, where is
According to the Mesa (Ariz.) Free Press, a horse fell down a 15 foot well at
that place and was pulled out of the well by another horse with a rope. Bv the
way, some man rigged up a pulley for him and attached the rope.
A Hot Springs man tried suicide with alcohol and had to complete the job with
& pair of scissors. A Hot Springs man should have known better than to try sui
cide on booze.
After four years of research among the numerous shell mounds around San
Francisco bay, Prof. N. C. Nelson of the state university expressed the belief that
the region had a prehistoric population of approximately 12,000 aborigines, subsist
ing almost entirely on clam chowder, oysters on the half shfell, mussels a la Bor
delaise and the like. A single mound contains 1,260,000 cubic feet of shells, rep
resenting 400 years' aftermath of a village of 100 native sons and daughters.
A big ocean liner took fire crossing the Atlantic and burned for four days, yet
rot a passenger on board knew about it and there was no panic. The fact that it
had been afire at all was only learned by the passengers after they landed. In the
old days of small boats, everybody on board would have been in a panic and all
probably would have taken to the small boats and been lost at sea.
Alarmist dispatches from Washington declare that the end of the Zelayan af
fair is not yet and that the Monroe doctrine is quivering in the balance. According
to these dispatches, Mexico openly objected to the United States creating itself
guardian of all the Americans, and is backed by several European nations, who
see a chance to rip the Monroe doctrine wide open and keep it in pieces. The
United States is still big enough to take care of itself and enforce the Monroe doc
trine, no matter who says nay. We always have enforced whatever we started
out to enforce, and we always will or this country will be made a waste while we
Herald Includes also, by absorption and
I HHHJWHH w
to subscribe for
The Herald should
beware of impos
ters and should
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pabliatks. The deixil 1
eg arcalaJSto casxaateed. j
fc t t I ft t St.
PAXXOT nnfT frvJ.nr. rmr Aojit. nhmit
feeling queer since I have caught a
full ot Bills and care. n.n1 has to sit
I cannot sing today, dear heart, about your coral lips; the doctor's coming in his
cart; he's making daily trips; he makes me sit in scalding steam, with blankets
loaded down and people say they hear me scream half way
across the town; he makes we swallow slippery elm and ink
THE SICK and moldy paste, and blithely hunts throughout the realm for
MINSTREL things with bitter taste. I cannot sing today, my love, about
your swanlike neck, for I am sitting by the stove, a grim and
ghastly wreck. And many poultices anoint the summit of my
head; I've coughed my ribs all out of joint, and I am largely dead; and so the
mention of a harp just makes my blood run cold; some other blooming poet sharp
must sing your locks of gold! Same other troubadour must sing to you instead,.
for I have earache in my feet and chilblains in my head! .
Copyright, 1903, by George Matthews
Wasnington, D. C, Jan. 3. A distin-
guished member of congress who Is
lather of a precocious boy of 6 is
finding it necessary to explain to his
friends over and over again a remark
made by the boy in
car last week.
a crowded street
Like manj- another statesman, the
distmgulshed member referred to is
extremely fond of poker. The hours with the biggest percentage of decen
during the progress of a game slip by . nial population gain of any state in the
as quickly as minutes slip by in the I union.
Early last week Mr. Congressman
went to a room in a hotel which is re
served for poker players of promi
nence. At 2 oclock in the morning he
was ?100 to the bad, but started to
"Stay and get even,", chorused the
men on the rim of the green covered j
table. ' j
"I'll play for one hour more, and i
IfrJUBJK r& w
then me for home." replied the con- j has been taken by Crawford, an aly of
gressman as he bought another stack, j Gamble. There is entire harmony be
As has been remarked, time In a tween the senators: but meanwhile
poker game flits away as swiftly as a
loser's money. Mr. Congressman's luck
had turned and it remained for the
bright sunlight to remind him of home.
"When he arrived there the whole
household was in a state of excitement,
"I was just going to telephone for
the police," said Mrs. Congressman. "I
thought you had been murdered, . or
j hurt, or something dreadful had hap-
penea to jqu.
Mrs. Congressman had some other j
remarks to make and the more, she (
talked the more hysterical she be-
came. Her lecture came to an end, J
however, with a threat. ;
"The next time you stay away over j
night I shall ask the police to find
A day or two latr Mr. congressman
was on his way to the capitol in a
street car, accompanied by his 6 year
old. Half the passengers knew him.
The j-oungster had been looking out of
the window and as the car passed the
district municipal building a squad of
police marched out of headquarters.
"Daddy," yelled the kid, "are those j
the pollcemens mamma Is going to send
after you the next time you stay out
I til night?"
Mr. Congressman is still supplying
cigars in his committee room and our-
chasing drinks downtown.
Emilio Duchesne, hero of the Mexi
can war, died at his home in Juarez at
10 o'clock last night at the age of 65
years, and his funeral is being held
Charlie Sue. the Chinese gardener
I who was beaten up with an iron bar
Saturday night, died at the Sisters' hos
pital last night at 11 o'clock. .
A new artificial Ice plant is being
started in this city, the incorporators
being J. H. Smith, Richard Caples, W.
W. Fink and John O'Connor. They have
ordered a $25,000 plant from Chicago.
They expect to commence the manu
facture of Ice May 15.
Through freights over .the Mexican
Central continue to run In large num
bers. The street commissioner commenced
work today putting up new fences on
the smelter road.
Sixteen carloads of oranges came over
this morning from Juarez and more are
The street railway company is mak
ing needed repairs on -the switch at the
Alderman Davis had a narrow escape
on Sam Antonio street last night when
a horse driven by a man named Meyers
ran into him, while he was riding his
bike. The alderman punched the horse
BECOMES BRIDE WITH
Couple, Married "Without Legal License,
Go Through Second Ceremony to
Make Sure Man from Mexico.
Mrs. Augustus MacDonald, who was
Miss Merrlott R. Degen, of Pasadena,
enjoys the distinction of being the only
woman In California to become a bride
on the presenatlon of a certificate of
the state board of health.
When Augustus MacDonald, of
Guanajuato, Mex., applied for a license
at the courthouse, he was given a blank
certificate to fin in and through a mis
take he carried the certificate to his
fiancee, .not having waited to secure a
regular license. Presenting the state
vonr locks of prnld. for mx fat head is
cold; and when a -bard is feeling off. and
aroxind and couirh. he sours on golden naar.
, The political feud in South Dakota
. has broken out anew and gives every
promise of blooming perennially. For
four or five years it has been one of
the wonders of the national govern
' ment that anybody in South Dakota
was able to get mall from the post-
. office, but the state goes right on grow-
ing and threatens to come up next year
The South Dakota feud has become
chronic. It began when senators Gam
ble and Kittredge split and Kittredge
set out to drive Gamble out of the
senate. The two representatives from
the state united with Kittredge and
Gamble trounced the combination. As
a result all three senator Kittredge
and representatives Martin and Burke
were left at home.
Kittredge is still there and his place
Martin and Burke, after being one term
In private life, have been renominated
and reelected, and they are both mem-
I hers again.
The house members are harmonious,
j too among themselves. But the house
j and senate delegations don't speak as
J thc-y pass, further than frigidly to pass
the time of day.
Now It happens that the postoffices
are tjle perquisites of the house mem-
berSf but thc Ts-at 0f confirmation lies
witn the senate. The house members
have been nominating postmasters and
the department has" been nominating
them In many cases; the senators hold-
ns them up whenever it was possible,
The war has been going on so long
that nobody remembers just when it
began. While Martin and Burke were I
in private life Kittredge was still in his l
senatorial seat and he held up Gam
ble's appointees, while Gamble held up
the KIttredgd nominations. Kittredge
is gone, but the two representatives are
back and the war Is renewed.
Incidental to all this, representative
Martin is expected to be a candidate
against senator Gamble at the next
election and to make a big fight for
the place. The feud passes on from
generation to generation and seems to
day to be healthier and more prom
ising than ever.
Years Ago Today
HERO OF MEXICAN "WAR DEES;
NEW ICE PLANT STARTS
(From The Herald of thia dr.te, 1895)
under the chin and knocked him over
while he fell the opposite way, escaping
The net earnings of the football
match New Year's day were blown in
on a banquet by the boys last night.
The weather man at Washington pre
dicted a northeaster for west Texas
this morning, but a southeaster came
in Its place.
General manager H. R. Nickerson, of
the Mexican Central, and superintendent
of car service F. B. Kercher arrived
this morning over the T. P., en route to
Mexico City in Mr. Nickeraon's private
J. C. Long, a California railroad con
tractor, is In town to confer with judge
Crosby relative to the building of the
Sierra Madre line.
The officers at Fort Bliss will give
a ball tonight. J
The First National bank has increased
Its office space and several new ap
pointments have been made. Joe Wil
liams has been appointed paying teller,
and W. Cooley has been made 'receiving
Paschal R. Smith nf nomino- ti-ni
probably make a proposition to the city
""'"'" i""'0hl luiauve to tne water
Metal market- Silver, .56 3-4; lead,
3.00; copper, .09; Mexican pesos, .54.
blank to a clergyman who was not
versed In the legal restrictions placed
on marriages, he performed the cere
mony. Yesterday the state certificate was
returned to be recorded and then the
oversight was discovered. Immediately
tho groom secured a license and the
marriage was performed again. Two
marriages on -the issuance of one license
is a new record at the courthouse, but
in the end the law has been complied
with, the officials are in a better frame
of mind and the couple is satisfied that
at least one of the ceremonies Is bind
ing. Los Angeles . Examiner.
Lest we loraret. let's icec-o oir moaov
at home and still get the i-est. Globe
I MAKING AMERICAN 1
HARBORS SAFE. Frea
SEAPORT CITIES TO BE AS SAFE AS INLAND TOWNS
ITH the completion of fortifica
tions now in courso of con
struction the American people
will be able to sit back with a feeling
of security from danger of foreign In
vasion. Ax the time of the Spanish-American
war the nation found itself all but un
protected In this manner. Should the
foe have been one of the really strong
powers instead of poor, weakened, en
ervated Spain, there is no telling how
serious the results to the cities of the
seaboard might have been. New York,
Boston, "Washington, Baltimore, Norfolk,
Charleston, New Orleans. Galveston and
San Francisco were all open -to attack.
Only obsolete guns and Inadequate
forts protected them, aside from tlie
protection they were afforded by the
roflt by Lesson.
But after the peace of Paris the mili
tary authorities of America began to
reflect how different it might have
been If we had met a stronger nation In
the arbitrament of the sword. They
felt that we would ultimately have won,
no matter what the power against us,
but that it might have been with every
seaboard city of the Atlantic coast In
ashes as a- part of the price of victory.
It was a lesson to them, and the Span
ish-American war was no sooner closed,
nnd the stock taking of its results end
ed, until the military minds at "Wash
ington began to bestir themselves to
the creation of ? modern system of
Every Port "Well Guarded.
Out ol their planning has grown one
of the world's most complete systems
for defending the coasts of a nation
irom attacK. From Portland. Me., to
Puget sound every impotrant har-
bor Is being put in such shape that the
fleet does not exist that might hope to
force au entrance. With the complete
system of high powered guns, mortars,
search lights, fire control and every
thing else that tends to give a fort ad
vantage over a battleship. It seems that j out the best system of harbor mining
the last word is being said in the way that exists In the world. Furthermore,
of preparation for possible trouble. every harbor from Maine to "Washing
Even the necessary munitions of war I ton cah be completely mined at a cost
nre being gathered together to be held
In reserve for the time when they may
When the voyagers of the world sal!
into our harbors they see frowning forts
of stone standing like sentinels on
guard. To the uninitiated they look
dreadfully dangerous and formidable,
yet they are only the relics of a by
gone age in warfare. They are In real
ity more dangerous than open ground,
;is the splintering of the stone would
do more damage to the inmates of the
fort than the missiles of the enemy.
Where .ae danger to the enemy lies
is not -in the stone forts, but in great
guns burled from sight behind ter- j be taken in perfecting the coast 'de
races of sand covered with nought but j fences of the United States will be the
an unoffending green grass.
Mortnra anu Big Guns.
Behind tnose little hillocks lies the
safety of every coast city In the nation.
These hidden mortars and guns may be
relied, on to sink any fleet the world
may send against them. The mortars
are gigantic short muzzled guns that
may shoot at any angle short of
straight up, and Avhen it is known that
they have a record of 70 hits out of a
possible 100 shots. It will be seen that
they have a business way of doing
The big guns with the long muzzles,
the ones which must be leveled at the
enemy, are mounted on disappearing
gun carriages. The gun is loaded,
aimed according to the directions given
by the fire- control station, and then
raised into position. When it is fired
the recoil throws It back and down Into
the pit. There It Is loaded, driven up
intop lace again and fired. Thus the
operation is repeated until the enemy is
at the bottom of the sea, or a flag of
truce flics at the masthead.
Most of these guns now in use are
of 12 Inch bore. They can begin pour
ing steel Into an enemy that Is 10 miies
or more away, and at five miles they
have frequently registered 100 hits out
of 100 shots, most of them being so
accurately aimed that they would go
through a hatch without disfiguring
the paint on the sides. Two of these
guns arc placed In a single pit, ana
together they can keep a shot in the
air nearly all the time, their combined
capacity being a shot every 15 seconds.
Larger Guns Being Built.
It has been found that the 12 Inch,
high powered guns are too short lived
for economical use. A gun with a larger
projectile and a little less speed will
do practically the same damage wncn
it hits, and the Injury by melting the
rifling out of the bore is very much
less. So 14 Inch guns are now being
built. These will carry projectiles
weighing 1660 pounds, and will be fully
as effective as the higher powered 12
Inch guns. Some of these are wire
wound and others steel jacketed.
Tell Funny StOriSS AbOUt El .
Pasoans and El Paso at
Taxing the capacity of the big Y. M.
C. A. gymnasium, the crowd which
witnessed the amateur minstrel show as
a part of the New Year's open house
at the Y. M. C. A. Saturday evening,
gave the black face funmakers a royal j
reception. That the performance was a
comDletvj success was evidenced hv tho
enthusiastic and spontaneous applause
that was given each joke, song and
stunt on the program.
Old Fanhloned Minstrel.
The first part of the minstrel show
was a copy of the Old fashioned min
strels. A stage had been improvised at
the north end of the gym, and on this
the funmakers were grouped in the
form of a semicircle, with a chorus of
15 of the Y. M. C. A. boys on a raised
platform In the background. The cur
tain went up on the entire company
standing and singing the opening
chorus, "It Looks to Me Like a Big
Night Tonight." This was hummed
behind the curtain first, then sung
softly, and again loudly with all the
gusto of a real negro minstrel.
Following the formal "gentlemen, be
seated," command from the interlocutor,
the black face comedians started a riot
of fun that kept the crowd laughing
for a solid hour during the performance.
Ira Huggett and sergeant Walter
Williams, of the police forco, were the
ill J u
The biggest gun ever built is the 16
inch monster that is now at a New Yor
fort. It carries a projectile weighing
a full ton and can hand it out to an
enemy 21 miles away. At 17 miles it
can toss its 2000 pound ball as accu
rately as a baseball player throws the
horsehide to a. team mate 17 yards away.
This gun has been fired only a few
Coast Defence Respected.
Before the Spanish-American war it
was thought that the firing of 10 shot3
by a coast defence gun was a good day's
work. Since then their soeed has been !
Increased to many times that much in a
single hour. After the Spanish-Ameri-
can war, when the new type of coast de-
xence was in its iufaucv. there was
great secrecy. Even a well vouched for
American could not see the batteries at
Secretary Root had his attention call
ed to this precautionary rule.
"Will your mines and guns work?"
"Yes." was the ready response.
"Then, why have any secrecy about
them; why not let the world know how
strong they are?" he asked. And since
then the world has known, and our
coast defences are respected in all the
imaginary wars which the armies and
navies of the world fight In their pro
The equipment of the coast defence
forts Is one of the most remarkable
evidences of military progres In Amer
ica. The immense searchlights which
reveal the enemy the minute he ap
pears, even on the darkest nights, the
wireless telegraph statolns that can
catch his messages, the system of fire
control whereby the position of the
enemy is determined, and the enicient
system of mining that has been devel-
i oped, all indicate the woe that will be-
tide the hostile battle fleet that essays
to pass the line of defence.
It Is said that Uncle Sam has worked
or less tnan that required to build a
The moral effect of these mines in
time of war cannot be overestimated,
since no nation would care to risk a
fleet In a thoroughly mil ed harbor. A
mine costing a few hundred dollars may
destroy a battleship costing millions.
Military and naval experts say that It
was the knowledge that her harbors
were amply protected that allowed Jap
an to fear nothing from the Vladivos
tok squadron, and enabled the Japanese
fleet to assume the offensive.
To Build Big Fort.
One of the most remarkable steps to
building of an artificial Island between
capes Charles and Henry at the mouth
of Chesapeake bay. On this Island will
be planted a great fort to prevent any
fleet from sailing in while our own
might be elsewhere
More peculiar than this, however, Is
1 the new Gibraltar, with which Honolulu
Is now defended. The crater of a huge
extinct volcano has been pressed into
service as a natural fort, and galleries
are being cut into It so as to place all
war material out of harm's way. When
It is completed it will be well nigh im
pregnable. Militia Aids Regulars.
The question of manning the coast
defences has been a serious one. Con-
gress will not allow even half of a war
footing for them. So the military au
thorities have provided for the situation
by Inducing the seacoast states to con
vert some of their militia into coast
These militia organizations meet for
two weeks In the year with the regulars
and watch them during the first half
of the time. During the other half the
militia man the places with the regu
lars by their side. The college men are
given charge of the fire control and
other positions of like importance, and
it is said to be marvelous how quickly
the militiamen become expert.
Certain paraphernalia is supplied to
each militia organization so that its
members can practice the important du
ties In their own armories -during the
other 50 weeks of the year.
The coast defences of the United
States proper are now about three
fourths completed, and about onethird
of the work has been done In the insu
lar possessions. hen those of the
United States proper are finished the
chances of an Invasion of the country,
uiless It be through Canada or Mexico,
will be decidedly remote.
When they are completed Boston and
New York will be about as safe from
the shells of an enemy as St. Louis or
Tomorrow Growth of Commercial
MANY LOCAL JOKE!
wo extreme ends. Henry Crawford,
CiPOrrro r?rnlr rJnrrtnn Pprrv rs-nrl Ronrrn
Helde were the other fun makers and
each of the black faced boys kept the
audience laughing with their cross fire
of questions and local hits.
Most of the jokes had local applica
tions. "You know this old architectual plug
ugly down on San Antonio street where
the hungry dogs loaf in the yard and
the scales "of justice are crooked and
the clock is on a strike?" asked ser
geant Williams of the Interlocutor.
"You mean the county courthouse,
"No sah. . No sah. Dat ain't the
county co't house; dat is the 'not guilts
of murder in de first degree house.
Well, do you all know who owns dat
"Yes, I know who owns the building.
EI Paso county owns the courthouse."
"Wrong again. The county ring owns
the co't house."
Titus In Trouble.
Helde: "Say Mr. Middleman, does
you know Mr. Titus, the man who owns
this here building?"
Interlocuter: "Yes, I know Mr. C. G.
Titus quite well."
"Yes sah; dat's him, C. G. Comin and
a Goin'. Did you know he got throwed
out of the Coats hotel at Meslllle park
"No, how did that happen?"
"They had noodle soup for dinner and
the head waiter caught Titus a garglin
Crawford: "Has you all ever rid on
this here old smelter cah linc-what runs
up and out, and up and down?"
Interlocutor: "Yes, I have ridden on
the smelter car line."
""Well then, you know how funny the
car goes. Runs a little piece, then
slows up, then goes fast a little piece,
then slows up. Do you know what
causes that. Mr. Executioner?"
"I must say I don't, Mr. Crawford.
"We will have to put that up to Harry
"I axed the conductor the other
mornin and he up and tole me what
caused that funny way th' cah had. He
I savs to me. savs he. what- n,iw if in
run fast sometimes and slow sometimes
is that It runs fast when the cah on ths
other end of the line stops to take on
"What Is Juarez?
Cook: "Tell me, professor, tell me
Rlease, is Juarez a . city or is it a
Perry: "Say, you high brow there
in the high chair, can you tell me why
dey call these here Kohlberg segars
j tnat 'VTaltah Kohlberg and his daddy
! makes Internationals?"
j "No, unless it is because they are
made here on the border between the
United States and Mexico, Mr. Perry."
"Wrong, dead wrong-. Why dey calls
them there segars Internationals is bo
cause you can smoke 'em on this side
and smeJi em on thp other side."
Helde: "Speakin of Mexico and the
United States, does you remembah. what
an awful crowd day had here at dls
Y. M. C. A. when Mr. Diaz come up from
Mexico to meet Mr. Taft? Well, I comes
In from Ysleta to see tho meetln' and I
tried to get a room here to stay ail
night. Man at de desk said he didn't
have no other room but if I went down
and axed MIstah Snyder, superintendent
of de cellar gang, he might fix me up.
Well. I goes down and Mr. Snyder lets
me sleep on de pool table. Next morn
in' when I axes him how much does I
owe him what do you reckon that old
grouch said to me? He says to me,
niggah, you owes me 30 cents a hour,
no extra charge for de chalk."
The 'musical numbers of tho first
part were effective and gave the ama
teur attempts of the boys a truly plan
tation flavor. Ira Huggett sang a,
negro rag time song, "Coal, Coal, Coal,
and was assisted on the choruses by
the entire company. Jack Bowen did a.
song and dance that was a hit. He
broke Into the show from the front of
the house and sang, "Tho Only Friend
I Have Is Me." giving a- clever clogr
dance for an encore.
O. D. Davis sang for a ballad number,
"You," and was forced to respond to
repeated encores. Mr. Davis's ballad In
the first part and .his olio number In
old fashioned songs were strong fea
tures of the entire show. George Cook,
and the circle chorus, sang a medley
of old time plantation songs, responded
to an encore with "Dear Old Georgia,"
and he was forced to give a second
encore, for which he sang the first
strains of" the opening and closing
chorus when he was joined by the en
tire company standing, the chorus be
ing whistled behind the lowered curtain
as a unique effect for the end of the
The second part opened with an
electric polka by Clifford Anderson, El
wood Carpenter, Lewis Robertson, and
Alfred Woods. H. L. Mitchell, physical
director of. the Y. M. C. A., gave a clever
gymnastic dance called a "Dainty
Dance" and was forced to give it over
again for an encore. O. D. Davis sang
"Eternity" and "Silver Threads Among
the Gold," for his part of the olio and
was again received warmly by the
crowd, his high, clear tenor filling the
big gymnasium perfectly.
The minstrel closed with a burlesque
prizefight between near Jack Johnson
ana almost Jam Jeffries. David Jones,
six feet four in his stocking feet, was
the black faced fac simile of Johnson,
while Oscar Brouillet, five feet one, was
Jim Jeffries's double. Johnson carried
his second, a diminutive black, boy, onto
the stage in Ms arms, while E. B.
Elfers, Jeffries's second, carried Brouil
lett on. The fight went for threa
screaming rounds, at the end of which,
Jeffries knocked Johnson down for
the count of ten with his famous knee
cap blow and he was declared the un
defeated champion heavyweight of tha
world. N. M. Walker refereed the
Gold Dnst TwIhs.
The Gold Dust Twins, wha acted as
curtain boys during the show, were the
funniest actors in the entire minstreL.
They were Billy Race and "Buster"
Biggs and they were dressed to repre
sent the famous washing powder twins,
wearing black tights, yellow skirts and
stockings and wigs. During the first
pant of the show they sat at the feet
of the Interlocutor. N. M. Walker, and
were as much a cause for laughter as
Kenneth McCallum played the over
ture preceding the f'rst and second
parts and also the scores for the
choruses and songs. Edward O'Brien
played for the Electric Polka and the
Dainty Step dance.
A BUSY MONTH
Eecover $1000 in Goods and
Make Many Arrests for
During December about $1000 worth
ot scuien property was recovered by tha
detective department. These figures
are according to the value placed upoa
the articles by the owners, to whom,
they have been returned.
That thieves and burglars were busy
during the last month of tho year is
also shown by the fact that IS houses
were reported robbed, and 33 petty
thefts of various articles, from valu
able jewelry down to overcoats, were
reported. Four persons reported'to the
detectives that they had lost jewelry
in the streets.
During the month 25 telegrams were
received, six answered and eight snt
out by the local officers, while 19 ar
rests were made. All of these persons
were transferred to the county jail to
answer before the county or district
court on charges of burglary or rob
bery. BUSINESS MEN HATE
JOLLY TALLYHO PARTY
A (tallyho party for making New
Year's calls was one of the unique
features of the New Year's celebration
in El Paso Saturday. The big tallyho,
drawn by four spirited horses and with
a trumpeter from Fort Bliss in full
uniform, swung through downtown and
residence streets, the men wearing aft
The tallyho calling party was com
posed of James G. McNary, James A.
Dick. H. S. Potter, C. E. Kelly, W. R.
Brown, John Dyer, T. M. Wingo, Win
chester Cooley and Dr. J. B. Brady.
Boats Collide; 12 Drown.
London, England. Jan. 3. The British
steamers Ayrshire and Arcadian -collided
in a fog in the Irish channel. Twelv
Lascars who returned to the Arcadian
for their clothes, were drowned.