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MKMBRR op TTOB srnipri NORTHWEST ___________#■ ___'___ _i __ __ — p-^ .A. I 'Jp_P^ ___ _^_P^ ?/; ' _#_P^_k ♦ nTIAVPO Buslnesi Office Main 12.
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THE TRIUMPH OF JUSTICE
How the Trial of Cases in Our American Courts Is
Expedited with Credit and Dispatch.
By any district attorney: "What is your name,
"I object, this witness cannot possibly remember
what she was christened, and the family bible would
be the best evidence."
"I withdraw the question. What are you com
Objected to on the ground that it is not shown
that the witness is an expert on "common callings."
"I will change the form of the question—what
name are you known by?"
Objection on the ground that it is hearsay, that it
is immaterial; not original evidence, and that no
foundation has been laid for it by showing that the
witness has any name.
Objection sustained. Exception noted.
"Have you a name?"
"What is it?" Same objections.
After argument, question allowed. Exception.
"My name is Mrs. Mary Smith."
Request to expunge the answer from the record
because it is not shown that the witness is married,
nor that her husband's name is Mary Smith. An
swer stricken out.
"Are you married?"
Objected to as secondary evidence, on the ground
that it has not been shown that the marriage certifi
cate cannot be produced, and is immaterial, as the
question of marriage is not involved. Objection sus
"Have you been known by any other name than
Mrs. Mary Smith?"
Objected to as leading. Defendant's counsel asked
to be hen id on this matter, but the question was al
lowed—lie seemed tnueh elated.
The witness theu answers, "Yes, Mary Jones."
Defendant's counsel moved to strike out the last
part of the answer on the ground that it was not re
sponsive. Motion granted.
"When did you assume the name of Mrs. Mary
Objected to by defendant's counsel on the pound
that the answer may tend to humiliate the witness.
. Question allowed.
"In eigbten hundred and umph, when I was mar
By the court —"One moment, you may say, if that
was the ease, that it w ras when } rou went to live with
The witness: Yes, that was it."
"How old are \'ou?"
Objected to on the ground that it is not shown that
she is old at all. Objection sustained.
"Are you more than 21 years of age?"
"Do you consider that your 21st year began at
your 21st birthday or ended on it.
Counsel objected to this as immaterial and incom
The remainder of the day was consumed in a bitter
■wrangle between counsel as to this question.
LOOKS as if a lot of Taeomans will be shut out
from voting next month because they are not regis
THE crowds around the bulletin boards show
"which is the gnnie that appeals to all Americans.
"THREE air men killed in one day," says a news
paper head. "Air men" seems to be a misnomer.
REFORMS got an awful blow at Los Angeles.
City prosecutor is undercharges of being caught with
an Alice on his lap.
HOW is Tacoma going to put up a showing for new
manufacturing interests seeking locations with sites
at $10,000 an acre and taxes over three per cent ?
GOVERNOR HAY'S supporters are doing a pile
of whistling to keep up their courage for they know
the woods is full of Bob Hodge voters.
COUSIN Bill Taft will be excused if he favors re
call of that California supreme court which wipes
him off the ballot and makes his friends vote for
NOVELIST Gertrude Atherton publicly declares
that Mr. Roosevelt has taken orders from Pierp
Morgan. Pause, Colonel, pause! No gentleman
"would admit a lady to the Ananias club.
"SIDE whiskers that curl out in front are the thing
in London," says a foreign exchange. Same in Ari-
Bona, only in Arizona they're the thing they shoot at.
"A NICE looking old gent, a stranger, meets me
on the street most every noon and asks me to lunch.
What course should I take with him!" writes Emily
W. Take all of 'em, dear girl—soup, fish, meat, pie,
cake, ice cream, jvalnuts, the whole menu. And if
that doesn't cure him, take 'em twice.
r%jj(M \r*l>>s y I ExaiuND \siNcz. Ojokr.'
Th buoyant boys, the gladsome girls are coming home from school!
.My blood runs red with revelry, though years have made it cool.
The (lit of little bodies and the bobbing mob of heads,
Canary yellows, raven blacks, thrush browns and robin reds!
The swirl of girlish garments and the letting loose of lungs. '
The babble and the Babel, yet the fusion of the tongues. >i,
O, Wisdom, thou'rt a droning dunce! O, Learning, thou'rt a foo.ll
O, let mo be a child again, and coming home from school. £r j
O, School house, I remember well how once I stood In awe^Hpf. _
Of your massive, passive countenance, your wide, omniverous maw.'
An Ogre, you, with appetite for little girls and boys;
You swallowed us in silence and you spewed us out with noise.. ,
Your stony stare glared at us as we hastened from or to you.^jU*'
Hut you never smiled, you never frowned in all the years I knew you,
Hut we —we shrieked in ecstacy to rid us of your rule,
And it's oh, to be a child again and coming home from school.
As many hours as Jonah's days within the spacious fish
The tyrant school house held us, and as much against our wish,
And the vitals of our liberty had scarce begun to sprout ,
Till this new Promethean vulture, all relentless, tore them 'out.
Yet, even as a traveler across the- scorching sands f;|
Is all th more rejoiced because he comes to fertile lands, I j
So we leaped as from a desert to a garden sweet and cool; A ;
So it's oh, to be a child again and coming home from school*
■■ - - ' E3
Of course, I've not forgotten that the troubles of our youth --
Wore as vital in their seeming as our real ones are, in truth,
Hut, by our backward vision now, how fruitful was our day!
And the work we thought was Irksome gave us appetite for; play.
And shall our eyes be wiser, when our present day is past? d .
Tucked in our turf-trimmed coverlet, shall we behold, at last;
That Life was all a lessonhouse, which irked us by its rule,
But we are children once again and coming home from school. .
A CRAZY INN -CAN YOU MAKE IT OUT?
The Outside Inn's tlio oddest inn
Of all the inii>, no doubt;
For every time I've stopped at it,
I've found the inside out.
GET out PRICES
4 Big Yards
Main Office. 1930 C. Main 689
1101 U Main 404.
So. 48 th * Tak. Main 47 4S.
No. 27th * Proctor. Proe. 750
THE T&COMA TIMES.
NIX ON POLITICS
NOT SO BAD ——
Mrs. Homer —You can't go
home while it Is raining.
Stay and have dinner with
us. , .
Mr. Witless—Oh. fiff
thank you; it isn't raining as
bad as that.
IT LOOKS LIKE A CHIMB
to separate a boy from a box of
Bucklen's Arnica Salve. Ilia pim
ples, bolls, scratches, knocks,
sprains and bruises demand It,
and its quick relief for burns,
scalds, or cuts is his right. Keep
it handy for boys, also girls. Heals
everything healable and does it
quick. Unequaled for piles. Only
25 cents at Jtyner Malstrom Drug
Co.. 938 Paciflo aveuue.
:; Merchant's. Delivery
Moving and Storage
;■ >:;-.r^ Main tOS. ;v "vy
"How long have you been
"Nearly seven months."
"And do you admire your
husband as much as ever?"
"Oh, yes, more. He man
aged to get his salary raised
last week."—Chicago Rec
A regular visitor is Osgar, the
tall boy of the "Osgar und Adolf"
farce-comedy. Osgar dropped in
looking for Adolf, but his old side
partner had escaped down the
laundry chute just as Osgar came
in. Osgar treated the office with
some of his keen wit that cuts like
a meat axe—especially whne
hacking away at dear little Adolf.
Osgar admits that he mortally
loves Adolf, and this affection is
mutually resented. Osgar has few
faults, it seems, beyond a mer
curial temperament that is con
tinually beating out its brains
against the cold stone wall of
Adolf's inflexible density. There
fore no one can feel very sorry for
Osgar if he breaks his blamed
neck In the attempt. You can fol
low his frenzied antics daily in
the Comic Page.
"Yes, my son."
"In olden times a woman
who wa a common scold
was punished, wasn't she?"
"Yes, my son. So was the
man she married."—Yonkers
WE HEARD SO
"What's this about the
"He says he doesn't want
the silk stocking vote."
"I thought he was rather
catering to the suffragettes."
—Kansas City Journal.
She—Your uncle is still In
the prime of life. You may
have to wait a long time for
your inheritance. i
He—Oh, no! He Just
bought an airship yesterday.
"Do you take this woman
for better or for worse?"
"I do, Judge, I do. But
I hope ye kin kinder strike
TRUE TO NATURE
"What piece was that your
folks wereplaylng on the electric
piano last night?"
"That was a descriptive com
position called 'Thunderstorm in
the Catskills.' "
"Well, it must have been a
pretty severe one—lt turned all
,th« milk sour over at our house."
I The Times Daily Short Story
THK GKKATEST SCULPTOR
By H. H. Hudson.
For obvious reasons it will be
best not to reveal my name, I
will furthermore state that the
authorities would disturb the
quiet of my declining years if
they knew what I know. The
game I played is worth the telln
For 30 years I served as a
funeral director In one of our
largest cities. I became skilled
In the art of embalming, but this
was not enough. I made a pro
found study of chemistry and was
at last rewarded. I discovered a
compound which, Injected after
death, left the body intact, its
substance being slowly replaced
molesule for molecule by a min
eral formation. I had discover
ed the art of rendering a dead
body permanent by patrification.
The mummies of ancient Egypt
were not to be compared with my
product. For my purpose the
sculptor was eliminated. I could
produoe the real, with every fea
ture retained as at death.
As I say, I had followed the
business of undertaking for 30
years. I had also kept bookß,
and knew where my subjects lay,
I found solace in the the thought
that I was preserving the disting
uished dead. I knew that my
time would come and that there
would be a better way than work
ing over a block of marble. My
work would surpass that of
JMihliiis. People had »lways long
ed to see their friends again. I
would give them the opportunity.
I went about my work rapidly
•—even furiously. The years
passed quicker than I knew.
While I was an undertaker I was
a sculptor in a larger sense. There
was pleasure in the careful prep
aration of each subject for the
tomb, the bodies being placed in
natural, graceful and artistic posi
tions. My work would be epoch
making. The time finally came
for me to assume my new role. I
closed out my business and left
town. After spending some time
abroad, I disguised myself and
returned, opening up a. marble
cutter's shop near the entrance
of the old cemetery where many
of my subjects had been quietly
sleeping for years.
It was not difficult to start my
business, for I had preserved my
records and knew where to so
licit patrons. I enlisted the ser
vice of a couple of trusted cron
ies. Then, going among the de
scendants of ttte old and disting
uished families, I sought out
photographs, telling my custom
ers that for a reasonable consid
eration I would furnish busts of
life-sized figures of their ances
It seemed to thorn marvelous
that a man could produce a statue
from a photograph, but my work
began to convince the most skep
tical. The mounting and polish
ing was all done secretly, and no
one was permitted to enter the
shop. I had orders from other
cities, but of course had to con
fine myself to the subjects I had
As time went on the various
cemeteries began to show the re
sult of my handiwork, and there
were few tombs which were not
adorned with a life-sized figure
or bust. I terminated my labors
by entering into a larger contract.
Several public spirited men had
taken a great Interest in my work
and a movement was soon on
foot to place life-sized statues of
distinguished city fathers and
benefactors on pedestals about the
public buildings. I took the con-
ALMOST A MIRACLE. 1
One of the most startling
changes ever seen in any man, ac
cording to W. B. Ilolsclaw, Clar
endon, Tex., was effected years
ago in his brother. "He had such
a dreadful cough," he writes,
"that all our family thought he
was going into consumption, but
he began to use Dr. King's' New
Discovery, and was completely
cured by ten bottles. Now he is
sound and well and weighs 218
pounds. For many years our fam
ily has used this wonderful rem
edy for Coughs and Colds with
excellent results." It's quick,
safe, reliable and guaranteed.
Price 50 cents and |1.00. Trial
bottle free at Ryner Malstrom
Drug Co., 938 Pacific avenue..
TO THE niSIMvsS MAN
with this bank! With its
aid he handles his payments in
the modern way with check!
It places at his disposal ev
ery banking facility to prompt
ly and safely conduct his busi
ness, and to form a connection
with what is known as a strong
bank is helpful.
This bank invites your ac
Rent your vacant no use through
a Times Want An. Only lc •
word. Phone Main 12. ••■
tract and saw the work complet
ed. For once the critics had
nothing to say. The work was
perfect. They did not know that
they were gazing upon the origi
nals. Henceforth I was besieged
with orders, but could no longer
keep pace with the demand made
upon me. My health was border-
Ing upon a breakdown. The fear
of discovery nearly drove me mad,
while the faces of the dead haunt
ed me day and night. I closed up
shop, destroyed all evidence of my
operations, and became lost to the
• • •
One night a watchman's attention
was called to the queer actions of
a bent figure as it feebly tottered
among the tombs. Unobserved he
listened to the prattle of the in
vader. Then he was taken into
custody. A manuscript contain
ing the foregoing account was
found on his person.
Do not postpone the opening of a savings account simply be
cause of the smallneu of your first deposit. All things, 70a
know, must have their beginning. The big thing* of today were
little things of yesterday—Remember, we receive deposits as low
as a dollar.
4 0/0 BANKERS TRUST CO. BANE 4 0/0
BANKERS TRUST BUILDING. TACOMA. WASH.
J I i %.* ji**fr^^ Mm
m mw » ■» HF
I / j£^ \ Mr
• *- • ft
Give the Children All They Want
Germea builds plump little bodies because
it's a natural food. .';. ~:
r| Germea I
Made of the choicest part of the wheat, is
full of phosphorus and gluten, known to be
. among the greatest blood and muscle mak
Order Germea of your Grocer.
(Get the Rod Package.)
Sperry Flour Company
Satisfaction Guaranteed or Money Back.
,; '■ TbßeerofQoJity
nPAKE a little tip from father— always order
_£;.. Pabst "Blue Ribbon" Beer served with your
It is the one beverage that should - always
appear on the table.
- In purity, nourishment, as an aid to digestion,
this incomparable beer will commend itself to -
people who exercise good judgment in whatever
they eat or drink.
Bottled only at the brewery in crystal clear bottles, -r
showing at a glance that it is clean and pure. > ? . „
M km Phone ot "STite for a case. /IltZSS^S^^
\r^S2£*k Langert Liquor Co.
s:^i'*Z!^l^*^i' 4»'':->* HIS Pacific Ay». f,'v;? Tscom*. W..U. >-^^sSSß^S*;l:*.' ■'■ ...
Thursday, Oct. 10,1912.
There la today in an institution
a feeble-minded old man who Is
given to queer fancies, and who
imagines he was formerly a great
sculptor; but nobody believes his
story, and his past la unknown.
The Haw BteamOT
UaTN Municipal Dock Dally at
• a. m. and 3 p. m.
TIM 1:00 p. ro. Trip Connect.
(or Bbolton. .
returning Leave» Olympta
11:15 p. m. and 6:00 p. m.
(or Taeoma and B«attl« 7.10 »
m Ph. Mala 8308.