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title: 'The Professional world. (Columbia, Mo.) 1901-192?, April 25, 1902, Image 3',
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Image provided by: State Historical Society of Missouri; Columbia, MO
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Copyrighted, 1902, by J.
Where clover will grow and Short
horn cattle are kept don't expect to buy
a (arm (or much less than 80 per acre.
A whole lot o( eager homoaeekers
are buying (arms weet of the one hun
dredth degree of west longitude in the
Dakotas, Kansaa and Nebraska and
are going to come to grief. That is a
stock country, not farming land.
We think that where so many as fif
teen cows are kept In the farm dairy
some arrangement srould be made to
have one man do all the milking and
give him plenty of time in which to do
it. It certainly would be better for the
A field of corn planted thickly for
fodder was dragged until it got to be
six inches high. While some of the
corn was thus destroyed, there was
etUl plenty left, and it only required
two plowings to make a perfectly clean
field of corn.
There is a peculiar significance con
nected with the Biblical phrase which
refers to "the grasshopper as a bur
den" when It Is known that 40,000,000
out of the 53,000,000 square miles of the
land surface of the globe are subject
ed to the scourge of these Insects.
The United States furnishes Eng
land with 63 per cent, of her bread
stuffs and 65 per cent of her meats.
So long as England Is compelled to
thus depend upon the United States (or
her very living there wll be no serious
ruction between the two countries.
Darwin once picked up a wounded
pigeon by the wayside. Its leg had
been broken, and in its contracted
claws wan a little lump of earth. This
Darwin planted to see what vegetable
life it might contain. Prom It he pro
cured fifteen varieties of plant life.
Right now, during the last days of
April, is the time to set out the straw
berry bed. We have sometimes thought
that the doing of this might almost
come unaer the bead of legitimate
Sunday work, (or the doing of It is
certainly a work pf necessity and
When a sixteen-year-old boy", unskill
ed In every particular can secure as
wages on a farm (20 a month, his
board and washing, as he can do today,
he alone is to blame if he Is not worth
$1,500 by the time he IS twenty-four
years old. But not one In ten of them
will save a dollar.
We have a score of seed catalogues
to look over this spring. We notice
that nearly every seedsman claims spe
Cremo Cigar RANDS and Old Virginia Cheroot WRAPPERS may be assorted
wltb TAGS from "STAR.," "HORSE. SHOE." "STANDARD NAVY." "SPEAR HEAD," "DR.UMKOND" NATURAL LEAF." "GOOD LUCK."
"BOOT JACK," "PIPER HEIDSIECK." "NOBBY SPUN ROLL." "J. T.." "OLD HONESTY." "MASTER WORKMAN." "JOLLY TAR."
"SICKLE" "BRANDY WINE." "CROSS BOW." "OLD PEACH AND HONEY." "RAZOR," "E. RICE, GREENVILLE," "PLANET,"
"TENNESSEE CR08STIE," "NEPTUNE," "OLE VARGINY," and TRADE MARK STICKERS from "FIVE. BROTHERS" Pip. Smohing
Tobacco, in securing these presents, ONE TAG being equal to TWO CREMO CIGAR BANDS or TVO OLD VIRGINIA CHEROOT
i TTrTittiBy jhidijnsoo kands I U I ooo bands N frga7 i in IIHJf.
Cremo cigar Bands and Old
WRITE YOUR NAME AND ADDRESS PLAINLY on autsld of packkf
contAtnlng BANDS or WRAPPERS, and forward them by rtiltlirtd mail, or
xpraaa propald. Ba aura to hava your packasa aaouraly wrapped and
property marhed, ao that 14 will not be laat In tranait. Sand banda or wrappara '
and reaueata for praaanta (alao raquaata for catalosuea) to C. By. Brown,
4241 Fslaom Ayanuo, St. Loula. Mo.
aial excellence for some two or three
new things in his line. These are al
ways high prices, and the almost uni
versal desire to try new things leads
many to Invest their money. Our ex
perience with these novelties leads us
to remark that In most cases tney
are best let alone, they seldom proving
to possess any merit over old varieties
and quite frequently being utterly
Just what is expected In the way of
work for the hired man on the farm
should be fully talked over and put into
written contract form before closing the
deal. If a man agrees to work ten
hours in the field and put in an hour
doing chores before breakfast and an
other after supper, and agrees to help
do the chores on Sunday, let him stick
to his bargain. If he does not want
to work 12 hours a day, let him do his
kicking before he commences work.
One of the most common troubles for
the landlord Is the difficulty of getting
a good tenant, and in very many cases
the landlord is alone to blame. He is
too stingy to put the farm in such
shape that it will be an inducement (or
a good tenant to take it. Good tenants
will not rent poorly equipped (arms
and pay tribute to a mean landlord if
they can help It Some men are too
mean to own a (oot o( land anyhow.
The Country Loafer.
We have run across him several
time the past winter. He was hatched
among the corn and potato fields, usu
ally the progeny o( some hard fisted,
avaricious old granger whose only pur
pose in living is to get more land. As
a boy. deprived of a boy's rights, like
enough worked too hard, living in an
atmosphere of greed and unrefinemcnt,
he gravitates naturally just as soon as
he is big enough into a rural smart
Aleck, taking to cigarettes, beer drink
ing and the periodical raising of the
devil In or.-lerly country communities.
He has no manners except bad ones.
When he looks at a young woman, he
leers at her. He Is unpleasantly con
spicuous . at horse races, circuses.
Fourth of July celebrations and camp
meetings, the legitimate prey of fakirs
and sideshow grafters, an all 'round
nuisance and really the very poorest
and most worthless product of the fer
tile farms of the country, coarse, loud
mouthed and never well dressed or
groomed, as his city cousins sometimes
is. This 111 begotten chap is the direct
antithesis of that Industrious, patient,
ambitious farm boy who gravitates
from the cornfields Into the highest
places In politics, commerce and the
religious and educational life In this
In nearly every community there will
be found not more than two or three
women who know how to cut and fit
ladles wearing apparel. These are crowd
ed with work, while scores of other
women are lamenting the (act that they
have nothing to wear and can't get the
services of a dressmaker. Now, these
helpless ladies can nearly all of them
do nice work in some line or ot'.ter
which does not count for much. They
can paint a little, do a little fancy
needlework, make doilies and gauzy
handkerchiefs, play a little on the pi
-ea -f- jMr zi4iiu& vajni m w a
The above illustrations
represent the presents to be given for
American Cigar Company
ano, stir up a mess of angel's food,
make aprons for a church fair, em
broider on canvas a red dog barking at
a blue parrot, run some women's club
for the elevation of the sex, do a lot of
correct society calling (after they have
ben able to get the aforesaid dressmak
er) and read a lot of the latest histo
rical trash. Now, this is written by a
man, and of course he may be dead
wrong, but all the same we want to
know why, so long as dress means so
much to woman' comfort and happi
ness, the girl should not be taught how
to cut and fit her own clothes in place
of teaching her to do a lot of the useless
things above mentioned. Old fogy no
tion, you ladles say. Well, maybe that's
so, but (or all that hardly any one thing
would do so much to make a woman in
dependent. We have fine reports o( the value of
the brome grass (or all that semiarid
portion o( the country where timothy
and clover will not grow. Some are
grass is run out by too close pasturing
this brome erass may be made to take
its place. If so, it will prove to be a
A it-liable young man. a good (arm
hand, who has worked out by the month
(or (armers for the past ten years, stat
ed before a farmers' Institute this win
ter that the farmer would get more
satisfactory work out of his men if
they were not required to work ho many
hours. He said that where work be
gan at 5:30 so the morning and ended
at 7:30 at niht it would pay to give
the men two hours' nooning instead of
one. We believe he Is right about this.
A few days ptnee we traveled over a
section of the West where 25 years ago
one might have traveled for a stretch
of 40 miles and never have seen a tree.
Today this once wild and bleak prairie
Is a beautiful panorama of high priced
rarms. with timber to be seen in every
direction groves on nearly every
farm: these groves, without doubt, per
forming a most beneflrlent work in
breaking the force of the winds and
modifying extremes of temperature.
The Mortgage Had Him.
While we do not know the man's
name and did not see the chattel mort
gage,' we have not the least doubt but
there was one with this place In Its
grip. All the farm tools were left out
In the fields movir, reaper, plow, aker,
hay loader. Three stacks of grain were
still unthrashed In February. We
learned that a few years ago the owner
had been left the farm by his father
clear of incumbrance. This young man
had a liking for low life In the town
beer guzzling, pool and poker and the
like and in five years he landed at the
bottom minus reputation, credit, money,
the resne?t of hit neighbors snd all
that makes life worth living. He was
staying the year of redemption out on
the place, and then the end must come.
Pity goes out to the little wlt and
children whom a hard fate compels to
share all this misery.
fnm mm m nriftA
Imtmnt ieriMe rVil ifS 8
pEarum1 .i4aiy . ywvBa Buovwn ndMe,
Virginia Cheroot Wrappers
OUR, NEW ILLUSTRATED CATALOGUE, of praaonta for 1902 Includaa
many artlolaa not shown above. It eontalna the moat attractive Hat af
presents oyer offered for banda and wrappara, and will be aaat by mall an
receipt of peataae two oeata.
Our offer of preaenta for bands and wrappara will aspire November L
HE rural telephone an' mall :
service has made top notchers ,
out uv the farmers," said
Uncle Bill as he threw a
bunch of new onions upon the editor's
desk and followed them with bis boot
"Yes," remarked the editor, "the
farmer ought to certainly be a happy
man now, especially out your way. as I
see that you get a trolley line, too." '
"Oh, we're gittin' 'bout all the dolns'
an' tixln's what's a-goin'," replied
Uncle Bill. "We ain't a fussln" 'bout
movin' inter town nowadays; we're,
studyln' out a summer resort proposl-
It Give Me a Shock.
tion, but hired girls are too durn scarce
since the telephone line has been estab
lished." "What has the telephone service got
to do with the scarcity of hired girls?"
asked the editor. '
"Wall, every farmer what has a tele
phone in his house has got ter keep t
hired girl, that's all there Is 'bout that,'
asserted Uncle BUI. "The women folki
can t 'tend ter the telephones an' theli
housework, too. Zeb Bowen Is all rlgh
'cause his wife's deaf an' the telephom
don't bother her much. She's jest at
curious as the rest uv tht women, but
she can't git inter the circuit on ac
count uv her hearln'."
"Out of the circuit? I don't quite un
derstand you. And then, as to al the
farmerc who have 'phones having to
employ hired gl.ls? You are a little
M Nl CD
Bfog Jf ej J fi f
(I POOtfTNWn I
BANDS MCCS 1 PORKS J.1 M
SUM Buchltom tumtim MO BANeoj
I I IWiik00 BANDS .....i-. .
banjos f ii,iliinn(Mina)cLrmturjtoosAtcfc
vague, old man; a little vague," re
marked the editor.
"It's jest like this," said Uncle Bill,
getting warmed up, "in order ter test
the problem uv how the telephones was
workln', I used a little strategy. Helen
had gone visitin' over ter Zeb Bowen's,
so I said ter myself now's the time ter
see Jest how much curiosity the women
Yer'll Bee Him Eatin' Pie.
folks along the line has. So I went ter
the telephone an' give two short rings
and' then three long ones. That is the
Widder Baxter's call, sort uv a two-call-five
game. Well, I antled with
the two short rings, so thought I'd stay
an' chiped in the other three rings; an'
a voice that sounded like eatin' horse
radish said 'Hello.' an' I said 'is that
you, Wiuder?' Agin that voice said,
'Yes. it's me.' An' then I had ter wipe
my eyes 'fore I said enythtng more.
Then I continued: 'Helen's gone away,
so I thought I'd call you up an' have a
visit' Jest then I heered Helen's voice
say, "the wretch;' an' then I heerd
Mandy Spencer say, 'Uv all things! Old
Bill is makin' a date with Widder Bax
ter; an' I heerd three or four more
voices give a grunt an' a 'huh.' and
slch like, an' It give me a shock when I
heerd Cy Prewett's wife sing, out 'I'm
shocked.' So I hollered back, 'so be I.'
'I Jest wanted the widder,' said I, 'an'
I've got ever gosh durn woman in the
"Say, you got Into a warm muddle,
didn't you?" Interestedly asked the edi
tor. "Yes, an" while I wa a-hangln' there
at the telephone, Cy Prewett called out,
Hel-helo-Blll,' and then he started In
ter 'josh' me. He said he's got a new
suit uv clothes, 'an electrlo suit. I ask
him what he ment by 'an electric suit,'
an' he said his wife had 'bought him a
suit an' had 'em charged.' Cy was inter
Chicago last week, an' I'll bet he heerd
;hat In there. An' then I said, Cy, have
yer got a hired girl ylt?AU us farmers
las got ter git one now, 'cause the wo
ven folks Is goin' ter be busy now, try
In' ter hear what everyone is say in' ";
in' then yer ought ter uv heerd the
nurmurs along the line. Cy always
tries ter help a feller nut, so he said:
No-slr-ee; don't you think that There
ain't a woman in the whole neighbor
hood what would be mean enough ter
do that.' Yer see h Id that so'st they
wouldn t talk box Y fix be thought
I'd got myself V' then be start-
TOOL StT ,
mntffVW mmm eater
ed In ter tell how our rural mail carrier'
had got a snap. I asked him how that
was an' he said, 'Watch him when he's -drtvln'
along an' yer'U see him eatin'
pie.' I said, 'Wall, what uv that?' Then
he said. 'Oh. nothln', only the women
folks along the line is baking uv him
pies, while corn bread was good enough
fur us;' and then yer could hear voices
whisperln' out, 'Oh, the vile liar,' an'
sich like; an' then Cy continued, 'I'll
tel yer. Bill, we've got ter watch out,
or we'll have more mail out at Shake
Rag than some on us want.' Wall, sir,
do yer know that so far there hain't
been nothtn' said 'bout me telephonin'
"Hasn't yer wife said anything
about it?" inquired the editor.
"Nope, but she looks as though she
had a bad case uv dyspepsia ever sines
that time. I told her the other day
that I guessed we'd have ter git a hired
girl, but she said, 'if I could 'tend ter
mywork, she could ter hers:' so I've
been workln' like satin since then. I'm
workm' so dumbed hard that I dream
I'm workin' when I'm alseep, an' it's
terrible rack in' on a feller's nerves,
'cause I can't sleep nights."
"Why can't you sleep nights?" awked
"Have ter lay awake ter keep from
workin. A feller has ter have some
rest," said Uncle Bill, as he Jumped for
the telephone and yelled "Helo there."
The Asparagus Bed.
If you want to set out nn asparagus
bed this spring, do this: Cut old roots
into three pieces with a sharp spade,
prepare your bed. digging up to a depth
of a foot. Fertilize heavily, using well
rotted stable manure, or the surplus
cats and dngs of your neighborhood
could be well planted right here and
give good returns. Cut none at all the
first year and sparingly the second, but
after that as liberally as you like. Do.,
not cut after June 20, but allow all tbe V
growth to mature on the bed. These
directions followed out will give you an -abundant
supply of one of the finest
vegetables the garden affords.
We are asked how best to renovate
an old' and weedy pasture. If possible,
we would plow It up and take a crop
of corn from It this year, a crop o( small '
grain next year and seed down anew.
If the land must be kept In pasture, we
would take a cutaway disk and give it a
thorough disking both ways, then sow
clover and timothy, dragging it smooth.
This will rejuvenate the blue grass and
practically make tbe pasture over new -
The city of Evansvllle, Ind., proposes
to construct and operate a telephone
system of its own at an Initial cost of
$250,000. The franchise of tbe existing
company will expire in July next, and
there were (our bidders (or the privil
ege, but the city will not consider any
Henry H. Edes, at a recent meeting of '
the Colonial Society of Massachusetts,
read a paper In. which he said that Prof. .
John Wlnthrop and not George Wash
ington waf the first person to receive
from Harvard college the degree of doc--lor