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Don OUara "Oi war toe dog f olght
lahst noight." Pat Malone "Did ye
win?" Philadelphia Inquirer.
"I wonder what induced Miss Jubb
to go on the stage?" "Her parents
started in by naming her Philomela."
Chicago Daily Eecord.
First Politician "The early boom
is builded on sand." Second Politician
"Yes, and the boom that wins is
builded on rocks." Indianapolis Jour
nal. Ella "Where does Bella get her
good looks from her father or her
mother?" Stella "From her father.
He keeps a drug store." Household
Rural Ragges "Say, Tatts, do you
think it's right to raise the price of
beer?" Tramping Tatters "I've been
trying to raise the price of one fer a
"Be sparin ob advice," said Uncle
Eben. "Ef a man takes it an' goes
wrong, he blames yer. An' ef he takes
It an' goes right, he thinks he knowed
It all de time." Washington Star.
Subscriber "How is it that you
have printed that long poem three
times in your columns?" Editor
"Well, really, I didn't suppose anyone
would find it out." Fliegende Blatter.
Hicks "Bowers has been telling me
some of his war experiences." Wicks
"And I suppose you believed all his
yarns?" Hicks "Oh, yes; they were
so uninteresting I'm sure they must
be true." Boston Transcript.
Mrs. Riley "And what trade does
your husband follow?" Mrs. O'Shea
"Sure, an' he f oilers a barrer at prisint.
When I married him he faid he was a
brass finisher, and he soon finished
every bit o' brass I'd saved. Pick-Me-Up.
Gadzooks "What's become of Blue
blood, who used to bore everybody by
talking about his ancestry?" Zounds
"O, he got married a year or so ago.
and now he is boring everybody by
talking about his posterity." N. Y.
HELD UP A TRAIN.
There Were Some Amusing Incidents
In the tiI Work at
The first shot fired by the Brooklyn
in the war occurred three days after
we arrived off Santiago, in the night.
It was a little after dusk, when the
Vixen, a torpedo boat destroyer, which
was lying well inshore, fired the red,
green, red rocket signal, indicating a
torpedo attack. At the same time a
small white light could be seeu moving
down the coast to the eastward. This
looked like business just what every
man had been wishing for a few min
utes before on the forecastle. Ship was
cleared for action with a rush and we
stood by our guns, peeping through
open ports into the inky blackness,
growing denser every minute, patient
ly waiting for orders to fire at the foe
dashed onto us.
The Iowa, lying astern of us, opened
up on t he shore with "her six-pounders.
This was too much for one of our or
dinarily cool-headed apprentice boys
and he let drive a port sis-pounder
without orders. It was our first gun.
Furthermore it came near being an un
fortunate shot, as it flew dangerously
close over the Marblehead's stern,
which, unbeknown to us, had run in
shore and broad of us, to t he consterna
tion of Capt. McCalla and his men. A
vigorous wigwagging of lights made us
aware of the fact.
Still, there was nothing to be seen
save the light moving along swiftly, a
strange proceeding for a torpedo boat.
In order to be in it, the Massachusetts
fired a six-inch at the light, and it went
out. All hands concluded that this shot
had put the enemy out of commission,
and while securing the guns wore hur
rahing for our consort. Shortly the
Vixen came alongside.
"I want to report to the commodore,"
pang out somebody on the destroyer.
"Well," answered the commodore,
who had come to quarters in pajamas
and was feeling chilly in the night air,
"let's hear it in a hurry."
"I wish to report, sir. that we have
been chasing a locomotive on the
beach, mistaking it for a torpedo boat,
and that the Massachusetts fired her
shot as the train went around a curve
out of sight."
Everybody laughed at the incident,
and none more heartily than the com
modore, who said that it was his first
experience in holding up a train. We
saw the engine make her trips on the
beach for several succeeding nights,
but were never fooled again. Cor. Bos
Fresh Water Troops at Sea.
When the Michigan regiments went
east a few weeks ago to embark on the
Yale for Cuba they imagined they were
to have a gay summer voyage. The
fame of the luxurious ocean travel had
penetrated the Michigan pineries, and
the Yale was known to be one of the
finest "liners." So the lads piled
aboard and made for the cabins with a
rush. But here they were confronted
with fierce-looking marines with fixed
bayonets. Repulsed at this point, the
Michiganders went about to find their
staterooms. They raced about the
decks, plunged down the hatchways
and thronged every entrance that gave
promise of disclosing one of those
luxurious little rooms. But the same
grim marines headed them off at all
points. Finally the order came for each
man to deposit his blanket and knap
sack In regular order upon the two
decks. That meant that each man's
stateroom was on the hard deck just
where his blanket lay. San Francisco
Willie I once knew a girl who near
ly died from Ice cream poisoning.
Nellie The rery idea! I would
never have dreamed of such a thin;
happening to a girl of your acquaint
anc. Indianioolis Journal.
CORN SHOCKING TOOL.
It Is a Temporary Binder to Hold th
Bunch Together While It la
B. B. Amstutz, of Birmingham, O.,
gives the readers of the New York
Tribune the benefit of a device which
he has tried with gratifying results
in shocking corn. He says that one
difficulty that is experienced in tying
with twine is that the shock is apt
to be bound too loosely, and then it
will not stand welL He aims, there
fore, to provide a way for getting a
good squeeze on the bundle before
Mr. Amstutz says: ''Take an old
broom handle a foot shorter than the
length of twine to be used. At one
CORN SHOCKING TOOL.
end make a hole through which you
can put a strip of leather, whereby to
attach a piece of rope to the stick.
The rope should be about four inches
shorter than the twine. A quarter
inch rope is the best size. At the out
er end of the rope fastey a ring just
big enough to slip over the stick eas
ily. In use proceed as follows: Take
the handle and ring in one hand, reach
nround the shock, pass the ring into
the other hand, and then slip the butt
end of the handle into the ring. Now,
shove the ring along the handle down
to the leather, turn the handle out
away from the side of the shock, and
it will stay there while you deliber
ately put the twine around and tie.
Throw the handle back, release the
ring, and go to the next shock." Mr.
Amstutz believes that he is the orig
inator of this device, but he is willing
that others should use it without
World's Deficit In Grain.
A world's deficit in grain for the
comingyear is the forecast of the Hun
garian minister of agriculture. He es
timates that importing countries will
nted 115.000,000 to 124,000,000 metric
centners, or, roughly speaking, 450,
000,000 to 500,000,000 bushels more than
their own output, and that exporting
countries will be able to send 101,000,
000 to 109.000,000 metric centners, an
apporent deficit of 14,000,000 to 15,000,
000, or say 00,000,000 bushels. This re
port, emanating each year at this time
from what is known as the Vienna
grain congress, is made up from a com
parison of official and trade estimates
of the world's production and require
ments. The figures put forth are by
ro means final, nor of any great value,
although interesting, as they seem to
reflect general conditions.
How to Tickle Pork.
Some one recently called for a re
cipe for pickling pork. Here is one
that we find good: Salt enough to
take out the blood and let it stand
two or three days. For every 100
pounds of meat take ten pounds of
salt, four pounds of Orleans sugar,
three-quarters ounce of saltpeter, two
ounces of soda and eight gallons of
water. Boil, strain and let cool. Then
pour over the meat. Let it stay in
pickle at least six weeks. Keep the
meat well under pickle, but be careful
not to weight it too heavy. If the pickle
Bhould not be enough to cover you
wil! have to make enough as propor
tioned above. This will depend some
what upon the shape of your vessel.
A. S. Watson, in American Cultiva
tor. Flax with Other Grain.
Under some conditions it may be
advisable to grow flax with other
grain. Flax is a very exhaustive crop,
but in this fact lies the advantage
when grain is sown on very rich land
in mixing some flaxseed with it. If
the flax is not grown the grain will
grow too rank a straw, while with the
flax to help exhaust the superfluous
fertility there is less danger of this.
There will be more of the grain
grown, while all of the flaxseed that
is harvested will be so much clear
gain. Barley is one of the best grains
to grow with flax, and both are ready
to eut at the same time. But both
should be very lightly seeded if clo
ver seed is sown the same spring, else
there will be a poor catch of cloven
When Horses Have Heaves.
There is no cure for heaves; it can
only be ameliorated or lessened in ex
tent by feeding on nutritive material
In small bulk, and more frequent ra
tions. All voluminous and coarse food
should be avoided, such as timothy,
millet and clover hay, and only the
best wild hay given in small quantities,
preferably finely cut, mixed with mill
feed or steamed food. Feed every
thing wet. Food and water should
be consumed at least an hour before
an animal is used for work. It is but
natural that such a horse will be
come weak and faint when driven or
worked hard aU day, for such a one
is only capable of performing slow
and light work, and it is cruel to use
him otherwise. Rural World.
To make dividing a success, colonies
should be very strong and almost
ready to swarm.
Use the best combs for brood nest
nd the oldest and roughest on the out
side far storage.
LAMBS FOR MUTTON.
Something Aboat the Breeds and Ho if
to Obtain the Host Satisfac
Probably the fattest sent to mar
ket are those obtained from a cross of
Merino and Southdown. They are
about ai plump and heavy for their
size as any bred, although they are
not the largest, writes E. P. Smith in
the American Cultivator. They are
generally desired by good butchers,
and very often they will command
fancy prices. Their Southdown line
age will be apparent in their black
faces and legs, and most butchers be
lieve yet, and with good reason, that
the "Southdown is the finest mutton
sheep in the world."
But the Merino contributes many
noteworthy qualities. The lambs get
their fatness and tenderness from the
Merino, and this greatly helps the
lambs in the markets. Altogether the
cross produces about as satisfactory
results for the general breeder of
lambs for mutton as any.
The lambs when two weeks old
should be taught to eat a little dry
food, and this can best be given to
inem witn tne nana, sometimes a
tempting dish can be made for the
lambs a mixture of clean oats, corn
and linseed in equal parts, ground up
finely and then salted and sweetened
with a little sugar. The taste of the
latter tempts the lambs. The ewes
should also be fed freely and with good
nourishing food to keep up the flow of
milk, for it is advisable for the lambs
to have plenty of the mother's milk
In a short time the lambs will take
their dry feed from a box or pan, and
then feeding them will be greatly sim
plified. Ordinarily it is not necessary
to get them to take dry food, but where
it is desirable to force their growth,
and make them lay on fat rapidly, this
method will be found verv satisfac
tory. The lambs that grow vigorous
ly from the first are the ones that pay
in the end, and it would not prove a
bad plan to adopt this method, even
though one has no idea of forcing the
lambs for an early market.
CORN FOR CHICKENS.
Poultry Thrives .Most Excellently
Ipon It Intll It Has Made Its
Without doubt, the very best feea
for a flock of growing chickens is
corn, jut whole corn fed to them in
unlimited quantities. If the chickens
have the range of the farm they will
not eat more corn than they need, and
the more they can be induced to eat
the faster they will grow. They get
enough grass, bugs, weed and prast
reeds when running about to balance
the corn ration, and it is one of the
best feci:.- that tan be given them.
The laying hens should not have so
much corn, so this advice should not
be taken without the hens can be kept
from eating with the growing chick
ens, for a laying hen fed all the corn
she can eat will soon get too lazy to
forage much, and in the end will get
so fat that she will be inclined to take
a rest from laying and become an tin
All the young poultry thrives on
corn until it has made its full growth,
There is nothing better for young
poultry than sweet corn from the fane
It gets to be good roasting ears until
the winter sets in. While this is being
fed the fowls will make weight in quite
a surprising way, and they are very
fond of it. There is no need to prepare
it in any way. They will take care of
It if the ears are husked and thrown
to them. If with the- sweet corn a sup
ply of sunflowers is available the fowls
will not only grow but their plumage
will become glossy and their combs
red. and they will be pictures of health.
The man who raises poultry and fails
to have a supply of sweet corn and
(.inflower seeds for them is missing an
opportunity to provide the best feed
that can be grown on the farm.
It Will Help Many a Unc Hack II
Yon Conclude to Ilnlld One
The horse is made of light material.
The cut explains itself. The rung
B should be 1-inch stuff, put in with
shoulders cut down to one inch where
it goes through the legs. The rung
Is put down so the ears of corn will
not catch when pulled forward. Corn
husking makes lame backs and sore
hands. The horse will help the back
and the following recipe will help the
bands: Take white wax, one-quarter
ounce, spermaceti, one-quarter ounce;
almond oil, one ounce; glycerine, two
ounces. Mix, melt the wax and stir in
the oils until they are perfectly mixed
and still continue to stir until cool.
Apply to the hands two or three times
a day. Wash the hands in warm wa
ter and apply the salve while the hands
are still quite damp, and rub them
until dry. It will keep them from get
ting sore. The prescription only costs
?0 cents for ingredients. Ohio Farmer.
In making a start in bee keeping,
choose the best bees, the best hives
and the best implements.
White clover honey is the lightest
in color and is considered the finest
A Bare War.
Young Mother (at photographer's)
How provoking that the baby should
tail asleep just when we want to take
his picture. What shall we do?
Husband Put him In the dark room
a few minutes. He'll think it's mid
night, and there's no danger of hi
s.ecping then. Tit-Bits.
Assurance of Peace.
Teacher I have been talking to yoi
of peace. I suppose yon all know the
meaning of the word?
Johnnie I do, sir.
"What is it, Johnnie T
"It's what we have at our house whet
pa goes off on one of his trips."
Declined with Thanks.
Mr. Oklboy Miss Younger Clara
from our first- meeting I have loved you.
May 1 hope that you will return my
Miss Younger Certainly, Mr. Old
boy; Til return it with pleasure;
haven't any earthly use for it. Chicago
A Smart Widow.
Charming Widow And what are yot
He Oh, amusing myself looking out
for number one. And you?
"Looking out for number two."
A Real Surprise.
Bride (just after the wedding)
Henry, you promised to give me a sur
prise after we were married. What is
Groom (a widower) I've got six chil
dren, my pet. Brooklyn Life.
Relieving Ills Distress.
"You see, her father first soaked me in
"Very. However, her brother kind
ly tried to wring it for me!" Cin
A SOLDIER-S ESCAPE.
From the Democrat-Message, Mt Sterl
When Richmond had fallen and the great
commanders had met beneath the historic
apple tree at Appomattox, the 83d Penn
sylvania Volunteers, prematurely aged, clad
in tatters and rags,
broken in body but
of dauntless spirit,
swung into line for
the last "grand re
view" and then
away to begin life's
fray anew amid the
hills and vallevs ot
the Keystone i3tate.
Among the number
Asa Robinson came
back to the old home
in Mt. Sterling, 111.,
back to the fireside
that he had left at
the call to arms four
years previous. He
went away a happy,
healthy farmer boy
n.- cv t,i.- r.i in the hrst nush ot
The Soldier t Return. ..:, m,i,j.
he came back a ghost of the self that an
swered to President Lincoln's call for "300,
To-day he is an alert, active man and tells
the story of his recovery as follows:
"I was a great sufferer from sciatica rheu
matism almost from the time of my dis
charge from the army. Most of the time I
was unfitted for manual labor of any kind,
and my sufferings were at all times intense.
At times I was bent almost double, and got
around only with the greatest difficulty,
Nothing seemed to give me permanent re-
lief until three years ago, when my atten
tion was railed to some of the wonderful
cures effected by Dr. Williams' Pink Pilla
for Pala People. I had not taken more than
half a box when I noticed an improvement
in my condition, and 1 kept on improving
steadily. I took three boxes of the pills,
and at the end of that time was in better con
dition than at any time since the close of my
army service. Mnce then 1 nave never been
bothered with rheumatism. Dr. Williams'
Pink Pills for Pale People is the only rem
edy that ever did me any good, and to them
I owe my restoration to comparative health.
They are a grand remedy."
"It's always pretty safe to judge a man by
the company he keeps."
"Oh, 1 don't know. There are exceptions.
My Uncle John's business makes it neces
sary for him to associate with aldermen a
good deal, and still I'd trust him with every
dollar I've got in the world. Chicago Even
When They Knew II Ira.
"There are plentv of women who would
be glad to get me." he said.
"Verv likely," she replied, pointed'y, "hut
none of them would care to keep you after
she once had you."
He went outdoors to say what he wanted
to say after that thrust. " He felt that he
couldn't do justice to it in the house. Chi
New York. Oct. 5. 1S9S.
CATTLE Native Steers .. 4 50 i$5 50
COTTI IN Middling
FI.Ol'R Winter Wheat
WHEAT No. 2 Red
CORN No. t
4 00 in
OATS No. 2 ,
PORK New Mess 8 50
BEEVKS Steers 3 75
Cows and Heifers... 2 00
CALVES (each) 8 00
HOGS Fair to Select 3 50
SHEEP Fair to Choice.... 3 00
i 14 00
tt 4 I'Jfc
if 4 25
(c 4 60
it 3 30
FLOL'R Patents (new) ... 3 50 if
Clear and Straight.. 2 90 if
WHEAT No.2 Red Winter. 66
CORN No. 2 Mixed 2914W
OATS-No. 2 23 ii
RYE No. 2 4
Lear Hurley 4 so
HAY Clear Timothy 7 50
BITTER Choice Dairy ... 15 U
EGGS Fresh U
PORK standard (new) ..
BACON Clear Rib
LARD Prime Steam
CATTLE Native Steers .. 4 00
HOGS Fair to Choice 3 45
SHEEP Fair to Choice.... 3 50
FLOL'R Winter Patents .. 3 30
Sprlns Patents 3 30
WHEAT No. 2 Spring.
No. 2 Red
OATS No. 2
PORK Mess (new)
CATTLE! Native Stters ...
HOGS All grades
WHKAT-Xo. 2 Red (new).
OATS No. 2 White
1 95 6
22 'i ill
CORN No. 2
FLOt R Hiith Grade 3 40
CORN No. 2
HAY-Choice 12 00
PORK Standard Mess
it 12 50
BACON Sides 6V8 ffl
COTTON Middling it 4".
WHEAT-Nn. 2 Red 7 0 OS'4
CORN No. 2 Mixed SI i 32'
OATS No. I Mixed 22 2!,i
PORK New Mess... 8 50 4i 8 75
BACON Clear Ribs Pi
accept it in the same spirit :
MRS. PINKHAJTS STANDING INVITATION.
Women suffering from any form of female weakness are Invited to promptly
communicate with Mrs. Pinkham, at Lynn, Mass. All letter are received,
opened, read and answered by women only. A woman can freely talk of her
private illness to a woman; thus has been established the eternal confidence be
tween Mrs. Pinkham and the women of America which has never been broken.
Out of the vast volume of experience which she has to draw from, it is more thaa
possible thatshehas gained theveryknowledge that willhelp your case. She asks
nothing in return except your good-will, and her advice has relieved thousands,
Surely any woman, rich or poor, is very foolish if she does not take advantage of
this g-enerous offer of assistance. LydiaE. Pinkham Medicine Co., Lynn, Mass.
" The present Mrs. Pinkham's experience in treating female ills is unparalleled,
for years she worked side by side with Mrs. Lydia E. Pinkham, and for sometime
past has had sole charge of the correspondence department of her great buaV
ness, treating by letter as many as a hundred thousand ailing women a year."
Better than Gold
and better than any other chewing tobacco ever
made: YOU are not obliged to die for it.
ihe JU-cent piece ot
is the largest piece of really high grade tobacco,
and you can get it anywhere in the United States.
1 1 when you
OUR STAMP ON THE SH0B YOU BUY
GUARANTEES these Qualities
St Louis, Mo.
"WELL DONE OUTLIVES DEATH."
YOUR MEMORY WILL SHINE
IF YOU USE
Page Illustrated Catalogue, describ
ing all of the famous
sent free to any address. Send your
name on a postal card to
WIMCHESTEB REPEA71IB ARKS CO.,
ISO Wlachsstw At... ftew Item, C.
And Consider the All-Important Fact,
That in addressing- Mrs. Pinkhun yon are eoafloV
ing your private ills to a woman a woman whoa
experienoe in treating woman's rHsum
is greater than that of an living phy
sician male or female.
Yon can talk freely to a woman
when it is revolting to relate your
private troubles to a man besides
a man does not understand almplj
because he is a man.
Many women suffer in silence an4
drift along from bad to worse, know
ing full well that they ought to har
immediate assistance, but a natural
modesty impels them to shrink froas
exposing themselves to the questions
and probably examinations of even
their family physician. It is nansa
essary. Without money or price
you can consult a woman, whose
knowledge from actual experi
ence is greater than any local
physician in the world. The fol
lowing invitation is freely offered)
ill ar" V
Alteas Cleertac Is UMoqlr snraear la
lb. world for Cknalc I! leers, B vteers,
mfolMf Vleer, Vrl.. Clears, Wklta
welllac r.v.r re., and sll OM .srss. II
sorer falls. Drswsost sll poison. 8stm.xp.dii.sb.
safferlnc. Cure. pennsiM.:.. BeMtalv. for Bll
Carbaseles, fMhM, .alt Wsanss, Biru,CsU
and til Freak Waaads. Bf mall, mall. Be; Isrsf,
Cx. Book trm. J. P. AI,LE MEDICIlfS
-.. .4. Faal. Mis a. by Braulata.
O rtQ O V NHW DISCOVOtT:
af nwIO I .stes nlft sad aia wnl
sat hm for ak ( tnUsMslai. asd l.dara
anlsut rraa. a, s. a. ssxu-s ansa. 1 ami, as.
A. N. K.-B
wmmrn wkitim to ABTaYjrnana