Newspaper Page Text
B. H. AUA3IS. Publisher.
"Tea- Sfars, your new hats are quite pret
I answereri mv - . , .
tt, J .......c cncrirsi Kins,
Who questioned while pinning their treat-
-nbVehf ,alr faces aId
But which is the loveliest, auntie
Be honest and tell us. please do
Belle s hat with the bright bird upon it.
may s blossoms, my egrets so bluer
n ere x a young man spare those blush-
A-seeklng a sweetheart or bride.
Just judging your fair, happy faces.
I m sure I could never decide;
But Judging alone by your bonnets.
,,7 never a glance underneath,
a a choose for a wlfo lrinH nnA nrii
The one with the sweet blossom wreath.
"Because, my dear children, the blossoms
P" oniy or fields and blue skies,
f spring and its lnnnrpnt
With Which all tviiA h..M. D...ii...
iWhile birds, thatvhould gladden the wood-
Or egrets, that stir at a breath,
iwith all of their sad stolen beauty.
Speak only of suffering and death.
The soft baby blanket of egrets
s ton from a dead mother's' breast,
Tis then that the feathers are fairest.
Though little ones starve in the nest.
The hunter cares not for the crying
Of those he has orphaned for gold
The pitiful cries of the nestlings
That perish of hunger and cold.
"The jewel-winged bird on your bonnet
Last summer was happy and free;
iWas flashing across the blue heavens.
Or filling the tree-tops with glee.
He died in the midst of a love song
O. woman's soft heart, think of that!
He died never dreaming you wanted
His beautiful corpse for your hat.
"'Each bird that is worn for adornment.
Each heaven-taught singer that dies
For vanity's sake has two slayers
The hunter, the woman who buys.
Dne kills and one pays for the murder;
Both equally Kuiltv I hold:
Because the sad slaughter would slacken
li woman paid not with her gold.
1t earth should at last become birdless,
And spring lose Its glory ard song.
The worm and the locust bring famine.
On woman would fall the dark wrong."
"Enough." cried the dear, dainty maidens.
wnne pity tneir Kind voices stirred;
"We'll nevermore wear for adornment
What cost the sweet life of some bird."
-Calla Harcourt. in Washington Star.
How DUOWAY'S Boy
Began His Business Career
'"P'HERE is something about your
I appearance the last two or
three days that puzzles me, Dugway,"
said Cunningham, as he finished sign
ing the last of his letters and began to
Jiunt in the drawer of the double
Iesk for a cigar. "I don't know that
I could define it exactly," he contin
ued, "because it's largely in your bear
ing and manner. You seem to have
thrown off some of the slough of rus
ticity which has been clinging to you
more or less since you went into the
suburb; your figure is more erect,
your eye has its old sparkle and your
clothes seem to fit you better. I
haven't seen mud on your shoes for
all of a week. What did you do with
those cigars? You don't mean to tell
me that you finished the whole box?"
"You'll find some very nice stogies
Sn the bottom drawer," said Dugway,
kindly. "I find that my income won't
over the old brand since I secured
your valuable services. Another thing,
a stogie is really one of the best and
most wholesome cigars that a rnnn can
fimoke. There is perhaps a little pe
culiar flavor about stogies at first,
but you soon learn to enjoy it. It's
an acquired taste, and I know that
you can acquire anything that isn't
locked up in a burglar-proof vault."
"I'll have to smoke one of my own.
then," sighed Cunningham, resigned
ly, drawing his case from his breast
pocket. "To resume: 'What have you
been doing with yourself? Have they
put in those electric lights at Lone
omchtirst or a"e they paving in front
of the village hall with vitrified brick?
You are certainly getting a sort of
semi-civilized look about you. if the
"If there's anything that excites my
pity, it's the feeble attempt of a
brainless yap to josh," said Dugway,
hotly. "You haven't been out to
Eldercroft mot than 6.C00 times, con
sequently you don't know that it has
more and better lights than any ward
5n the city and more miles of cement
sidewalk than Hdye Park, better po
lice protection "
"I thought you told me that the po
liceman was sick," interrupted Cun
ningham. "Well, what's the reason
you've quit this little 25-cent-ride par
adise?" "I suppose my wife told your wife
that when she saw her yesterday. But
it's quite likely she didn't tell you
that I'm going back to Eldercroft
next week and I'm going to take that
kid back with me and put a ball and
chain on him."
"Of course; who else would it be?
I'll tell you what. I'm seriously con
cerned about that boy. It has always
been my ambition that he should be
come a useful member of society like
lis father, but unless something is
done to check his mercenary tend
encies he'll be a millionaire or some
thing of that sort. He's always out
for lucre; and the easier he gets it
the better he likes it. I never was that
way myself. I like to work hard, and so
long as I make enough to provide for
my frugal necessities and keep you in
stogies I'm satisfied; but Vance isn't
ver satisfied, and he never misses a
chance to work me. I'm afraid that
my liberal disposition has spoiled him."
"Yes, those hundred-dollar bonuses
that you are always holding out to
the kid if he'll stand on his head for
24 hours or carry the cow in from the
pasture without spilling the milk
must be having a bad effect on him.
Did you ever give him an uncondi
tional nickel in your life?"
"He never strikes me for less than
dollar, said Dugway. "He's got a soul
"Then you can make your mind easy.
ne 11 never be a millionaire, said Cun
Dugway began to chuckle in a sub
dued way as at an amusing recollection
that had occurred to him, and as Cun
ningham stood this unflinchingly an
without manifesting any curiosity h
presently said: "He had a loose tooth
the other night and he kept me and bis
mother for the best part of an hourtry
ing to pull it for him. He didn't wan
it rudely yanked out with a finger and
thumb, so I tied a thread! to it and at
tached the thread to the door handle
in the time-honored wav. I eot th
other side of the door and jerked i
open suddenly, but the kid was 'on
and he came, too. I said that I would
try it again, and tied? the thread an
gave it a good old yank when he wash
looking for it. That time the thread
broke and he began to weep, and
wouldn't let up until I promised him
quarter. At last I just naturally lifted
the tooth out. and then he wanted me
to make it half a dollar because of hi
fortitude. The fact of the matter was
that he didn't know what I had done
until I showed him the tooth. Then he
wanted to know whether I wouldn'
give him a dollar if he kept his tonirue
out ot the hole for the rest of the even
ing, and I didn't see anv Darticula
harm in that, so I told him that I would
He promptly stuck his ton cue out of
nis mouth and sat down to read. In
about half an hour he got up and wrote
on his slate that he was sleepy and
wanted to go to bed. I told him that it
lacked an hour of bedtime vet. and i
ne went before the deal was off. Of
course his mother had to interfere then
and say that it was a shame to keep
the poor child up when he was so
weary that he could hardly hold his
eyes open, and the result was that he
went to bed, and I had to pony up the
next aay. i think he must have played
the races or something, because he was
broke when I came home that nieht
and he tried to touch me for five to
buy a full-blood fox terrier pup that
wouict stand on his hind legs and count
up to JO and bad a record of 16 cats.
I thought it was time to give the
young man a good talking to, and I
aid. i told him that he was bie enough
to earn money himself by more honor
able methods than sticking his toneue
out and then lying about being sleepy.
i instanced several cases within my ex
perience where boys not nearly his age
were the only support of widowed
mothers and put their younger broth
ers through college by selling matches
He asked me whether I wouldn't stake
him to enough to buy a popcorn stand,
and1 when I gently but firmly refused he
looked injured and wanted to know
how he was going to get his start.
r.xercise your own ingenuity, mv
son. 1 said. ou have got 50 cent
capital of your own. or you should
have: you have youth and health and
strength, and a fair amount of inher-
ted intelligence. Apply these and re
member that all forms of labor are
"He seemed impressed, and I didn't
expect to hear anything from him for
awhile. I wasn t disappointed': he
didn't attempt to touch me for a week,
confining himself strictly to his moth
er, as I afterward heard. At the end
of the week I was roused one dav out
of a nap on the lounge by a ring at the
doorbell. It was Thursday evening.
and the lady who assists us in our do
mestic labors had gone on her period
ical spree. Mrs. Dugwav was in the
kitchen, so I went to the door. There
was a burly-looking fellow there with
a red beard and a gruff voice. He said:
want my windows washed."
"I said: 'That's interesting. When
did you first make the discovery? I
take it very friendly of you to come
and tell me about it. Are they badly
caked or is there just an alluvial film
"'Your name is Dugway, isn't it?
" 'Vance P. Dugway. I replied, po
litely. 'My wife's name is Emmeline
Baxter Dugway; we are both Amer
ican born and there have been no
deaths in the family from contagious
or other diseases within the last year.
"I don't care anything about that,
he said, very surlily. 'All I want to
know is whether you can clean win
dows and whether you will be on hand
if you say you will. I have more
derned trouble getting some little job
done by a pack of are you working
"'I was resting when you came. I
answered. 'As for cleaning windows,
that is where I shine. So do the win
dows. Won't you come in and take a
little dinner with us and talk the
matter over? Well, if you won't, you
might continue your walk, and as you
go along you can feel thankful that I
am wearing my slippers.' Saying which
I shut the door on his language and
went back to the lounge wondering
what kind of a lunatic he was.
"We weren't half through dinner
when there was another ring at the
bell. This time it was a woman, and
she asked me if my name wasn't Dug
way and my number 2441. She seemed
to have an idea that she might be
mistaken in her surmise. When I had
reassured her she wanted to know
whether I couldn't come over to her
house in the morning and beat some
carpets for her. I told her that I
would be delighted to, but that un
fortunately I had another engage
ment. "'When can you come, then?' she
asked. 'Have you got anything to do
in the afternoon?'
" "I'm afraid the stoves I've got to
black will take up most of my after
noon. I said, sorrowfully. 'Saturday
I have promised to clean a number of
cisterns, and Monday is my day fori
making my rounds with the eoe-kroacn
powder. You see how it is yourself.'
"She looked at me suspiciously, and
beyond me into the hall. Then she
said: I suppose you think yourself
smarts and flounced off.
"l told my wife that it was some
foolishness of yours and not to answer
any more rings that evening. That
was how it was that we missed your
kind call, I suppose. There were about
IS rings altogether, and finally I got
tired and went out for a walk to com
pose my nerves. When I got back
there was another man standing on
the steps and leaning up against the
bell button. It appeared that he
wanted some carpets beaten, too.
think I lost my temper and said some
ungentlemanly things to him, because
I know that he wanted to whip me,
and he was going to try to gratify
himself when a policeman came up,
Then he explained and produced this
card in justification of his intrusion
on the privacy of my home."
Dugway tossed the card over to his
friend. It was inscribed:
VANCE P. DUGWAY.
Carplts beten, windows woshed
Call at 2441 Champel avenue.
ALL WORK DUN PROMPTLY.
"Yes, it was Vance." said Dugway.
One of his friends had one of those
little printing presses, and he got
about 10,000 of those cards printed on
it and pushed them under every door
within a radius of two miles. It cost
me a dollar over and above the cost of
the printing to get the edition re
called, and it was a week before our
door bell got a rest. He said he
thought he could get a boy he knew
to do the work on a commission."
Chicago Daily Record.
TWO-NOSE'S TAKING OFF.
Indian Killed by HalUtonen After
Having Been Twice Danced
Over u Dead.
Word comes from the Rosebud re
servation of the death of Two-Nose.
one of the old blanket Sioux, who has
had a varied career, reports the Min
neapolis Tribune. His death was
caused by hail while in an unprotected
part of the reservation, his body being
mutilated with hailstones. Two-Xose
was twice before subject of the sorrow
dance among the tribe which revered
When a yonng man he. with the
young braves, was engaged in diving.
n which he excelled. The voung Sioux
dove from the bank with the avowed
intention of crossing a pond 100 feet
wide. As he failed to appear upon the
surface again, his companions reported
m as having been carried a wav bv
evil spirits. The camp was accordingly
moved, the sorrow dance and mutila-
ion of relatives resorted to. and the
medicine man of the tribe was impor-
uned to allay the evil spirit. Three
days later Two-Xose came into raniD
n a half-starved, whollv exhausted
condition. He had actuallv dived
across the pon.l and entered the sub
merged passage of a beaver den. Twice
he essayed to rise to the surface and
each time struck the ton of the nass-
ge; finally, in a state of straiiiru'a
ion. he reached the air chamber where
he beaver slept. In the inkv blackness
he was unable to asrain find the uass-
age. He accordingly began dig"in
his way out with a piece of wood he
found in the ien. and had soon com
pletely filled up the passage by which
e had entered. After three days and
wo nights of incessant labor he suc
ceeded in reaching the surface of Dip
ground. This exploit raised him to the
dignity of a medicine man who suc
cessful- defied the evil spirits.
As chief medicine man he had a
ream in which he was told that he
could fly like the eagle. He spent years
n gathering together the various herbs
nd fetishes he was instructed to n
order to make him float in the air.
The old fellow had faith in his mpri-
cine anil never took the precaution to
ry it on a moderate elevation, but
went to the ton of a cliff and. .ift.i-
properly anointing his body, jumped
off anil began flapping his arms as a
bird would its wings. Hut he fel'. to
he ground and was nicked un fonle.-wl
nd his funeral rites again solemnized.
gain he fooled the sorrow dancers bv
reviving and lived until a few davs
since, when the hailstorm finished him.
A TIP TO A SCHOOLBOY.
Canon Farrar Tealllleii to Enlovl
the Company- of an Eng
When Dean Karrar, then only a
canon in rank, was traveling in a
third-class compartment on an Eng-
ish railway he opened a conversation
ith his fellow passengers on a fa
miliar topic. The conversation soon
became general, but a youngster of
13 returning to school was seated in
corner listening to all that passed,
but too shy to join in. The canon
espied him and good-naturedly ad
dressed a remark to him from time
time. At an intermediate station
the compartment was emptied of all
but the clergyman and the school
boy. Then the conversation veered
promptly on to sport and kindred
subjects. Over half an hour elapsed.
the canon shook hands, smuggling a
ve-shilling piece into his palm. To
the eternal glory of the schoolboy be
recorded that he hesitated to take
the tip. "I've enjoyed the talk, sir,
and I never knew that parsons were
that sort jefore." he said. The com-
iment, though vague, was genuine.
You needn't mind taking i. from
me. he rejoined in reference to the
p, adding, with a twinkle in bis eye.
'it's sure to come iu useful."
"Miss Anteek seems very much in
terested in that homely old musician.
"Yes. She heard that he made over
tures quite frequently." Philadelphia
"What does Mildred mean when she
says that she is engaged in campaign
work?" "She means that she is writ
ing her letter of acceptance to Theo
dore. Denver News.
Mrs. Smith "So Hat tie is going to
marry Mr. btickker, after all?" Mrs.
Brown "Yes, she was forced to it. It
was the only way of ever having an
evening to herself." Boston Trans
She "I heard about yonr elopement
with Gertie Giddygirl, Mr. Snooks. Has
her mother forgiven you?" He "Xo
fear! She knows how to pay off an old
score. She has come to live with us!"
An Unfortunate Occurrence. Lacin-
da "What stahted de row at de sta
tion?" Melinda "Dat vulgah Jim
Johnsing went a little too fan." Lu-
cinda "How's dat?" Melinda "Why,
he frowed a hull rice-puddin' at de
A. "How did your automobile jour
ney turnout?" B. "Beautifully! Al
though I ran over two pedestrians and
three bicycles and knocked two wagons
into a ditch, my motor was not at all
injured and I arrived just on time."
Griggs "Women are funny things.
Wonder why a woman instead of put
ting her pocket book in- her pocket al
most invariably carries it in her hand?"
Briggs "Perhaps she thinks that
some man may come along and seek
that hand in marriage." Boston
House Owner '"Yon didn't par the
rent last month." Tenant "Xo? Well,
I suppose you'll hold me to your agree
ment. Owner "Agreement what
agreement?" Tenant "Why, when I
rented you said I must pav in advance
or not at all." Columbus (O.) State
AN IRISH JAUNTING CAR.
Article of Traanportatlon
With in the City of
A long line of vehicles, outside cars
and cabs, some of them battered and
shaky, others sufficiently well look
ing, was gathering on two sides of the
gretn, says Kate Douglas Wiggin, in
Atlantic, for Dublin, you know, is
the car-drivingest city in the world."
Francesca and I had our first experi
ence the other day. It is easy to tell
the stranger, stiff, decorous, terrified,
clutching the rail with one or both
hands, but we took for our model a
pretty Irish girl, who looked like
nothing so much as a bird on a sway
ing bough. It is no longer called the
"jaunting," but the outside car, and
there is another charming word lost
to the world. There was formerly an
inside car, too, but it is almost un
known in Dublin, though still found
in some of the smaller towns. An
outside car has its wheels practically
inside the body of the vehicle, but an
inside car carries its wheels outside.
This definition was given us by an
Irish driver, but lucid definition is not
perhaps an Irishman's strong point.
It is clearer to say that the passen
ger sits outside of the wheels on the
one, inside on the other. There are
seats for two persons over each" of the
two wheels, and a "dickey" for the
driver in front, should he need to use
it. Ordinarily he sits on one side,
driving, while you perch on the other,
and thus you jog along, each seeing
your own side of the road, and dis
cussing the topics of the day across
the "well, as the covered-in center of
the car Is called. There are those
who do not agree with its champions
who call it "Cupid's own conveyance:"
they find the seat too small for two,
yet feel it a bit unsociable when the
companion occupies the opposite side.
To me a modern Dublin car with rub
ber tires and a good Irish horse is the
jolliest conveyance in the universe;
there is a liveliness, an irresponsible
gayety. in the spring and sway of it;
an ease in the half-lounging position
against the cushions, a unique charm
in traveling edgeways with your
feet planted on the step. You must
not be afraid of a car if you want to
enjoy it. Hold the rail if you must,
at first, though it's just as bad form
as clinging to your horse's mane
while riding in the Row. Your driver
will take all the chances that a crowd
ed thoroughfare gives him; he would
scorn to leave more than an inch be
tween your feet and a Guinness beer
dray; he will slink your flounces and
furbelows in the very windows of the
passing trams, but he is beloved by
the gods, and nothing ever happens
Reflection of a Bachelor.
Love isn't quite as comfortable as
laziness, but it's a lot cheaper.
A woman's heaven would be a dead
failure without it had a little fuzzy dog
in it and a big garret.
A woman gets most of her happiness
out of remembering how miserable she
was some particular time before.
A woman is considered bright by the
other women by the number of kinds
of a fool she can make of a man in five
Every time a woman sits up half the
night acting sweet to a Tot of men she
wakes ub the next morning and acts
ugly to the one she is married to. X. T.
CAPE GUB AJRPT ATT, MO.
ROBT. 8 TURD IV ANT, President.
LOUIS 7. KLOSTERMANN, Vice-President.
LEON J. ALBERT, Cashier.
U J. ALBERT, JB, Assistant Catalan
Re Wai Xo Esrotlnt.
you marry me. Miss
mexT asked Mr. CoIImgwood.
"Xo. indeed," replied she. "1
wouldn't marry the best man on
,:Of course you won't. You'll neveT
have an opportunity. Bat that is no
reason why you shouldn't marry me.
Detrat i'ree Press.
FIRST NATIONAL BANK
CAPE GIRARDEAU, MO.
DAVID A. GLENN.
XV. B. WILSON,
DAVID A. GLENN,
H. P PEIRONNET,
WM. H. COERVER,
W. B. WILFON,
R F. DAVIS,
J. A. MATTESON.
INTEREST PAID ON TIME DEPOSITS.
EDWARD S. LILLY,
Blount's True Blue Plows,
ROCK ISLAND FLOWS,
PONY PLOWS AND DOUBLE SHOVELS.
The Prescott House.
Always open to the Public with the best accommodations foi
The Prescott House Bar is up-to-date in every respect, and
I announce to the citizens of Cape Girardeau and
Vicinity that I am sole agent for the
Celebrated I. W. Harper Whisky.
HENRY HUHN. Proprietor.
Cape Brewery and Ice Company,
CAPE QIRRDEJCJ, MO.
BREWERS OF STANDARD LAGER BEER.
WM. REG KNHAEDT, Pre..
I- F. KLOSTERMANN", Vice-Pres.
E. H. ENGELMANN, Sec'y.
CHRIS HIRSCH, Treas.
E. II. ENGELMANN.
L. F. KLOSTERMAKX
ADOLPH RCEDIGER, Manager.
IRON MOUNTAIN ROUTE
St. louis, Cairo and all points north and east. Connection is mad at Si
Louis and Cairo with through Exprers trains for Chicago, Cincinnati.
Louisville, Indianapolis, Cleveland, Detroit, Buffalo, JCcw York. '
Philadelphia, Boston, Washington and all principal eastern. t
cities. Pullman Buffet Sleeping Cars to all point.
Only One Change of Cars to San Francisco,
Solid trains to Galveston, Houston, Dallas, Kort Worth, San Antoclo
all Texas points. Only route to Hot Springs, Arkansas.
K. C Tsirasend, General Puaearer and Ticket Agent. St. Louia,