Newspaper Page Text
THE ARGUS, FRIDAY. FEBRUARY 14, 1908.
The'David Harum'of Politics
Personal Side of Joseph G. Cannon", Who William J. Bryan
Prophesies Will Be the Next Republican Nominee For
President Self Made Man With a Big Heart
and a Delightful Personality. -:
By JAMES A. EDCERTON.
f"jrtHE Hon. Joseph G. Cannon
9 speaker of the house of repre- j
sentatives, uncle to nil the Unit
ed States and some outlying de
pendencies and who will be the next
Republican nominee for president, ac
cording to a prophecy by William - J.
Bryan, is known as the "lavid 11a
rum" of politics. He was born of
Quaker ancestry, a fact which would
not be suspected from his language,
but which is faintly hinted at by, his
whiskers. "These hirsute adornments,
which were once as fiery as their own
er's expletives and waved in the fore
front of battle like the bright oritiauib
of war, are now as white as those of
a blllygoat, which pugnacious animal
.Uncle Joe resembles in other ways.
Mr. Cannon is past seventy, but does
not believe in the Osier theory. No
man past seventy does. All the con
verts of that doctrine are under sixty
and are liable to a sudden change of
faith oupassing that crucial birthday.
rtJncle Joe does not look seventy, does
not feel seventy and does not act sev
enty. As a man is only as old as he
looks, feels and acts, Cannon should
call the almanac by a shorter and ug
lier name and send it to join the presi
dent's gallery of liars. This act would
so add to his popularity among all
women past thirty that it would cer
tainly land him in the White House.
Besides, It would be carrying out one
f the policies of the administration
and might even divide the Taft sup
port from that quarter.
Has No Use For Oslerism.
So vigorously does the speaker ob
ject to being Oslerized that he takes
the thing seriously and makes an ar
gument against it. When asked if he
was ready to be chloroformed accord
ing to the Osier formula. Uncle Joe
"The ablest, the most learned, the
most forceful leader the Democratic
his mouth, generally pointed as nearlyj
straight up as a somewhat assertive
nose will permit; gesticulates in speak-1
lng like an excited Jumping jack; , sits;
on the small of his back, with his feet!
on a desk; slaps people on the back and
llclk'lit thfin with H-jiinp tnls'! liinkri
like a joyous old farmer, by day andj
dresses and goes to banquets, .like aj
plutocrat, by night; use.' some exple-j
tives that can be printed and others)
that cannot; is very attentive to the
ladles; runs foot races, dances Jigs and -
dues other unexpected things that men
of seventy are not supposed to do and
generally conducts himself in a rather:
Interesting but perfectly irresponsible
"Darn Poor Job at It." ;
This is the Cannon manufactured by
the reporters. The other the one he
said he made himself and '"did a darn
poor job at it" bears a remote like
ness to this caricature, but that Is
about all. It is the difference between
a cartoon and a half tone. The orig
inal has the general run of features
and expression ascribed to hini, It Is
true, but with the emphasis' different
ly placed. The caricature italicizes the
peculiarities, while the real portrait
brings out the underlying fineness and
beauty of character. Mr. Cannon has
most of the idiosyncrasies that are
charged to him and perhaps u few
more, but they are not all of him. In
deed, they are but a small part, and the
superiicial part at that.
Cannon, like most men of his type,
is better than he is painted Is better
than he paints himself for it is the
habit of such men to caricature them
selves quite as much as the newspa
pers caricature-them. Nor do they af
fect the pose. It is spontaneous, yet it
docs them injustice. In the old phras
ing they put the worst side out. They j
wear a comic mask, which has but a I
grotesque likeness to their own trua!
Needs Room. Needs Money.
Your cHoice of any
Suit or Overcoat
in the store worth
up to $20.00, for
Vv VX-V v HI ill! t
j5.-; V.Sv.- -:::,, nihMU
jtf So, - '
8. I M x'l "d x
I is ?; t4
Xf I'll. V'.Wiff' JTX 'jr7i,vWil" .
For any Suit or
up to $20.00.
Blacks, blues and
all other colorings.
For Cash Only. None on Credit. One Day Only,
Your choice of our entire stock up to $20.00.
SPEAKER CANNON AND MISS HELEN CANNON,
party has had in my time or any oth
er time was Samuel J. Tilden. Why,
Many things account for this tend
ency of some men to show their worst,
the Democratic party today would be J or at least their roughest, aspect to the
puonc. iiaireu or snam is pernaps
the' most potent. They bo despise the
Tharisee, the chap with the holier than
thou attitude; they so abominate the
charlatan, the prig and the fon, tthat
glad to take up the cadaver of Tilden
and hail it as a leader."
"And how old was Tilden?" some
"About a thousand, wasn't he?" re
plied the speaker, "Anyhow, he was
There is at least this much to be ; Beem less good" than they are rather
said. In Uncle. Joe's favor. He is old t than more.
be well for those actuated by the same
democratic spirit to follow la his foot
Perhaps the most Immediate InCn
ence in shaping men of the Jackson
and Lincoln school, to which those of
the Cannon and Tillman type belong
In lesser degree, is that of early envi
ronment. Lack of college education,
too, has something to do with It. Your
overage college, with all that may be
said for it. has a monotonous tendency
to reshape all men by the same pattern-at
least outwardly. The inward
man is something that even colleges
cannot entirely deprive of individual
ity. Conformity kills manhood and civ
ilization. There is no species of same
ness so deadly as that of character.
God made souls, end he made them
different. Higher education Is a great
thing, but it would be still greater If It
had too much reverence lightly to in
terfere with these God made differ
ences In the souls of men. 4
Joseph G. Cannon was fortunate
enough to escape this Ironing out proc
ess that polishes all men into a sem
blance of each other. lie made himself,
and even if he did do "a darn poor
Job" he at least preserved his individ
uality. The unique result is as delight
ful as a breath from prairie or moun
tain after months of the depressing air
i of the city.
Samples', of His Stories.
Cannon's stories are not as famous
;as those of Lincoln, but he tells quite
V, At? AtlWmV ik , LA
want to be genuine that they prefer totaa ,nany theu- ami th are of thu
. rm wa-,vr tnnn w r rn tw '. san,e Quality, smacking of the soil and
Datly driving home some point. Here
enough to run for president If he wants
to. He Is not barred by youthfulness;
neither Is there any danger of his be
ing referred to as the boy orator. Still,
although nearly seventy-two, he is not
as old as Gladstone and Disraeli while
Likes to Be One With All Men.
Another reason for the exterior af
fected by a man of the Cannon mold
is that he desires to seem and be like
his fellows. He does what the rest
A Tip for Fat Women.
In a few years that excess fat of
yours will become a bad habit im-
they were yet great parliamentary j do not so. much because be wants to(posRibIe break Better take tinie
leaders, as Von Moltke and Bismarck
w hen they whipped France and made i
Germany, as Lord' Roberts and Taul
Kruger when they led their respective 1
sides In the Boer war, as Goethe and 1
Ilerschel when they did some of their ,
best work or as Henry Gassaway Da- ,
vis when he returned to earth to run '
for vice president. . j
One ot the reasons that the speaker
has been able to live to such, a hala
int Tnrhirtclnn fruit rr oven hpcnus' be
wants to gain favor, ; but merely jb'.th' forelock and reduce now in a
through a sense of brotherhood and natural way if you would keep intact
good fellowship. It is an aspect of the the youthful symmetry of 20 through
democratic attitude, not the highest lne trfQ) fi of nlidd,e Go io
aspect perhaps, but still one that musfthe drjggist and ask hlm for 'omi'ce
be recognized. Yith most men who Marm()la ounce of Extnu;t
are ruled by this impulse it is but dim- CasctLl&:Arom:iti and z outlces of
telous. By the keen mind of Abraham
Lincoln, however, who had the same
characteristics himself, this inner mo-
Syrup Simplex. Take a teaspoonful
after meals and at bed time. Mix them
at home -if you wish, but see that the
Marmola conies to you In a sealed
packas;e. 1 ' ,
This mixfure makes Orm flashed,
and frisky age Is that when the angel
of death came looking for those saintly 1 tlve was clearly seen and stated. He
characters that are cut off In the flower said that nothing could be very, wrong
able to prove an alibi. He was either That is quite characteristic of Lin-, " !rT!Lt tJ'
- I f m- r,ln .nln'. l9rM .llotir dnrl foltl. In mil. "'. 1 t.-n
Jority rule,; but-it; Is a doctrine .not
without its perils for all that. It is a alio win them to gather at th waiot
fine thing to be one with all men, not 1 Without disturbing the - diet, or
to seem separate from them In any. re.l5lS exercise to help it out it
way, but it is a finer thing to be one dissolves the. fat away just where need-
with truth, to be white to the core. Tn! : .-- , 11 nas u,";u hM"w lui
Lincoln was both, or as nearly so as ' mert "itway harmlessly as much as 1C
any man seen In our time. It would ounces a day without causing a single is "a fellow that goea around looking
. 'Wrinkle. . , i - .. I tor thorns to sit on."
ing poker, swearing at the Democrats,
acting as bank president or serving in
congress, none of which can be de
scribed as exactly a saintly occupation.
There are two Cannons, one made by
the newspaper correspondents and, 'the
other by nature. The newspaper Can
lion always has a very long cigar la
are a few' samples that are good, even i
If not all new: . 1
It has always been the custom of
speakers to bow to the secretary of
the senate when that functionary ap
pears with a message from the august
upper body. AVhen I'ncle Joe was in
formed by his couchers that lie must
make a great bow on these occasions,
he balked. He said he did not bow to
the senate and would not bow to Us
In. this matter, however, he was
hardly practicing reciprocity, for Can
non is the one speaker that has mado
the senate bow to him on several oc
casions. On a Washington street car crowded
to suffocation, after the well known
manner In which our public service
corporations herd and jam the Ameri
can people, a big man In trying to get
out stepped on several persons. Jam
med others Into the corners aiuf dis
arranged the hats and clothes of sev
eral more. Uncle Joe was slammed up
against a window.
After the cyclone had passed the
sage of Danville mildly Inquired as to
the identity of the big man who had
maintained his rights even though he
did have to walk over everybody else.
"senator Clay of Georgia, lie was
"Vell" said Uncle Joe, "he must
think that his getting out is guarau
teed by the constitution."
When the speaker once refused to
talk to the reporters, one of the bolder
of the scribes said:
"Well; Mr. Speaker, I am going to
wire tonight that your course will
be" But be got no further.
t.f, 1.... ....1.1 ...m.-m n Ffnt,i I .... n
.i i .r uuj . mi HJ v .lunula titrv. uuiia ic- j
ly, but firmly, "I don't mind
things occasionally, but I draw
;line on having to edit what you say."
Neat Reply to a Landlady;
In a country hotel in Illinois Mr.
Cannon was so unfortunate as to up
set his coffee and was soundly berated
by the landlady. He said nothing, and
at the next meal she returned to the
attack, remarking that It was a good
thing for him the coffee did not stain
This was too much for your Uncle
Joseph, who rather hesitatingly and
meekly replied: -
"Use more beans, madam. You'll
have to stain your coffee before you
can expect to stain your' cloths."
When Reed was speaker and Uncle
Joe was at the head of the appropria
tions committee, a friend one day ac
''Joe, I "hear you are a bigger man
than the speaker."
"Oh, no!" replied the sage of Dan
ville. "You do me too much honor. Do
you want to dethrone Christ?" j
Uncle Joe's definition of a pessimist
Joseph G. Cannon was born in North
Carolina in 1S3I!. His parents removed
to Indiana soon after his birth, where
his father, who was a physician, took
an active and at one time a. perilous
part against slavery. The boy clerked
in. a store, received a common school
education, studied law and was ad
mitted In Illinois, where he was soon
fleeted state attorney of Vermilion
county, serving seven years. He was
chosen to congress in where lie
has served continuously ever since,
with the exception of two years. For
six years he was head of the appro
priations committee, in which capacity
he drafted the bill appropriating $."Hl,
tKHMK for the Spanish war, the iirst
formal declaration of hostilities. He Is
now serving his third term as speaker.
Mrv Cannon is a bank president and
is fairly wealthy, having good houses
at Washington and Danville. Mrs.
Cannon lias long been dead, and his
establishments are presided over by a
daughter. Miss Helen. Uncle Joe of
late years Is becoming quite a society
Is Bryan a prophet, and will Cannon
be the next Republican nominee for
president? The administration will op
pose hlm, as it classes hlm among the
reactionaries. On the other hand, he
will have powerful support from most
of the members of congress, who are
generally men of Influence in their
states, mysterious as that may seem
to those who see them in Washington.
Just Found a Soul.
"Talking of Jekyll and nyde ef
fects," said a chronic bachelor at the
club, "I got the surprise of my life the
other night. Met a woman, the wife
sayln" ( WI a lneua w no marneu ner a year or
jj, . do ago. . i.iiew uer ueioru uiaiuagc
' nnrl nlnrfiT-a f liriiio-lit cna ivna tnr linma-
ly ever to find a husband one of the
uort that polite writers call 'uncompro
"Well, sir. when I entered her home
last night .she had the same old face
made ine feel sorry for her husband.
really. Then she got to talkiug about
some charitable work she is engaged
in for crippled children and. presto.
sue suddenly became beautiful: Never
caw such -a transformation in all my
life, really not the same woman some
how. "The deuce of It is I couldn't dissect
the change, but I guess the eyes had
more to do with it than any other
feature.- I bad ilu idea of advising her
husband to confine her conversation to
that particular charity, but I'm afraid
he'd regard it as a bit personal." New
The following lit of new books
have been received at the public
liluaiy and will be ready for circula
tion tomorrow morning:
For .lacin.a Harold Bindloss.
Th Labor Movement in Australasia
V. S. Clark.
The Little City of Hope; a Christ
mas Story F. M. Crawford.
Literary Rambles in France M. B.
The Ancient Law Rllen Glasgow.
Adventures in Contentment David
Margaret H. R. Haggard.
The Crimson Conquest; a romance
of Pizarro and Peru C. B. Hudson.
Italy Today Bolton King.
Davenant Albert Kinross.
Tennyson's Idyls of the Kin jr. and
Arthurian Story of the ICth Century
M.. W. Maccallum.
The Franco-German War of 1S70-71
Count H. K. B. von Moltke.
Furniture of the Olden Time F. C.
The Groat Secret E. P. Oppenheim.
Food -and Dietics A. P. Norton.
The Mother of the Man Eden Phill-
The Art of Landscape Gardening
Admiral's Light II. M. Ridoout.
I The American Constitution F. J.
I Dr. Ellen .1. W. Tompkins.
Hays Off Henry Van Dyke.
The Settler Herman Whitaker.
Books for Children.
Foodshonr. How the World Is Fed
F. G. Carpenter.
Boy Life on ' the Prairie Hamlin
The Boy Electrician E. J. Houston.
Tales of Romance Andrew I.ang
Tales of the Round Table.
Story of General Gorden Jcanie
The Cave Boy of the Age of Stone
M. A. M c-In tyre.
Two Royal Foes E. A. Madden.
The Millers and Their Playmates
C. D. Piorson.
Boys of the Border Mrs. NT. P. W.
The M. M. C; a Story or the Great
Rockies Mrs. C. M. AV. Vaile.
The best remedy known ody for
all stomach troubles is Iadol, which
is guaranteed to give prompt relief.
It is a natural digestant;' it digests
what you eat; it is pleasant to take.
Sold by all druggists.
Skin Disease of 20 Years' Standing
I want you to know how much
Chamberlain's Salve has done for me.
It has cured my face of a skin disease
of almost 20 years' standing. I have
been treated by several as smart phy
sicians as we have in this country and
they did me no good, but two boxes
of this salve have cured me. Mrs. Fan.
nie Griffin, Troy, Ala. Chamberlain's
Salve is for sale by all druggists.
All the news all the time The Argus.
The Best Spread
The delicious extract of
whole corn o unequaled
quality and flavor.
Tine and Dandy for
Griddle Cakes to Candy
la air-tight tins, 10c, 25c, 50c.
COSN PRODUCTS MFG. CO.
if x Wi