Newspaper Page Text
THE ROCK ISLAND ARGUS, FRIDAY. NOVEMBER 4, 1910.
Published Dally and Weekly at 1624
Second avenue. Rock Island. 111. tEn
iered at the postofflce as second-class
BY THE J. W. POTTER CO.
TERMS. Dally. 10 cents per week.
Weekly. Jl per year In advance.
All communications of argumentative
Character, political or religious, must
have real name attached for publica
tion. No such articles will be printed
Dver fictitious signatures.
Correspondence solicited from every
township in Rock Island county.
Friday, November 4, 1910.
Clyde H. Tamarr has beem a faith
ful representative of the people aa a
ewapaper correspondent at Waahina
torn. He will be a faithful representa
tive of tbe people as a member of cow
arreaa at Washington.
"Well, did you reach hands across
Ihe river to Teddy?
The Thanksgiving: turkey can not
yoost high enough to escape high
An airship can travel a mile a min
ute. Doesn't it make you flighty to
think: of It?
With other celebrities, Roosevelt
lias .the average press agent backed
bff the boards.
If there are so many deadly germs
&s the scientists say, it is a wonder
that anybody ever lived to be a grand
father. A man can live on a dollar a week,
according to a Yale professor. Well,
he can't live much more than a week
on it in these days of tbe Payne-Al-drich
"Wright brothers are preparing to
carry a little freight by aeroplane.
This will presently make the inter-Btate-commerce
commission sit up and
"No republican newspaper in tbe
Fourteenth district has defended Mr.
McKinney's voting record, let alone
giving his record any praise. The
only thing that has been said of any
consequence is 'The tried and true
James McKinney.' True to Cannon
ism is what they would have said had
they completed the statement." Thus
reads one of the letters received by
Clyde H. Tavenuer from down the
Quincy Herald: Cities who have op
erated the commission plan of govern
ment are getting plenty of advertising
as advanced and progressive commun
ities. Most of them are In fact grow
ing rapidly. It might not be a bad
Idea for Quincy to get rid of the bur
den and Incubus of its common very
common council and try a new deal.
It is certain that any change would be
an improvement. The census returns
of another decade might be materially
improved if some of the business men
instead of the dinky two-cent ward pol
iticians took an Interest in affairs.
An Exploded Slander.
Mr. Roosevelt and his candidate for
governor of New York have been hoist
ed by their own petard; in other
words, the colonel has been "stung"
" fcy his paper trust showing on John
A. Dix. who, the evidence shows, had
no connection with the Standard Wall
Paper company. The colonel, finding
himself proven to be a calumniator.
- resorts to the worst form of defense
. by repeating the slander.
Evidently the new nationalism does
: not include the "old moralities;" for
the decalogue declares: "Thou shalt
not bear false witness against thy
Lieutenant Afflly Rooan has retired
from the Chicago police department af
ter long and honorable service. In
making his farewell he said to his
comrades: "Don't graft boys, don't
drink, and be good husbands."
This advice is good for laymen as
' well as pblicemen. Lieutenant Roban
; went from the bottom to a place at
the top. He always had the confidence
; of his superiors and the public. When
he retired the whole city sang his
Why, because he was honest and he
never drank. The man who at 65 can
; say that, is worthy of honor. It is
y good advice for the young man. Do
your duty in whatever position you
i are placed. Always be honest and
The young man who makes this his
life shield will be successful.
The Panama Canal.
It 13 all nonsense for foreign govern
ments to object to this government
fortifying the Panama strip. What is
the United States spending nearly a
half of a billion of money for if it is
not to be allowed to concentrate In a
navy in either the Pacific or the At
lantic ocean? It bought the Panama
etrip and has the right to protect it
for its own uses, especially in case of
w ar. If the Panama canal is to be neu
tral in time of war, those joining In
the UBe of it at such time must pay
their share of the cost of building it.
If England and Japan want the right
of way through the canal for their
ships in case of war, they certainly
should be required to help pay for the
building of that expensive undertak
ing; and in time of peace pay the tolls
for using it, as the ships of all nations
.will have to do.
The United States is not building
the canal for exhibition purposes; but
for use and to keep down the cost of
transportation from the east to the
west, and to aid our merchants to con
trol the commerce of the Pacific. The
next congress, if it is democratic, will
vote the necessary money to fortify
the canal, and will not say "by your
leave" to any other nation.
A Political Reconnoissance.
Champ Clark, the democratic
leader of the house of representa
tives and candidate for speaker of
the next house, in a late speech said
that Senator Cummins of Iowa may
be the republican candidate for
president in 1912. Senators Cum
mins and La Follette are the lead
ing republican Insurgents, and if
Mr. Roosevelt is laid on the shelf
the one that haa the greatest
strength in the national convention
will no doubt be a strong candidate
With republican defeat in the east
ern state, the strength of the insur
gent leaders of the west will be en
hanced as the faction that can bring
victory out of defeat. But the in
surgents will find that the business
element of the republican party
will fail to support a radical candi
date of the Cummins or La Follette
type and without such support the
state of New York, New Jersey, Con
necticut. Ohio. Maine and probably
some other eastern states would
swing towards democracy on the
state rights and tariff issues.
Mr. Roosevelt has told us that if
defeated in this campaign he will
continue to fight, for new national
ism, which from the platform an
nounced by Mr. Pinchot is to be
more Radical in the future than at
present. Mr. Roosevelt thought that
it was very "good sport" to bait Mr.
Bryan as a socialist and an unsafe
man; but he finds the "good sport"
very exasperating now that the
tables are turned on himself. The
colonel is not used to being the un
der dog in the fight, and it nettles
him and makes him lose confidence
in his power as a leader. All this
will have a great effect on the re
publican campaign for the presi
dency; and in any event new lines
will have to be constructed during
the coming year, for the . new na
tionalism and the old guard will
still present two factions that can
not be brought into sympathy for
any probable candidate. It is not
too much to expect an open seism
in the republican party with two
presidential candidates in the field.
With the democrats victorious in
this campaign, there will be a more
complete organization of the party
and much less opportunity for fac
tions to develop. Victory and power
help to establish unity, unless some
great issue arises to divide a party,
which does not appear probable as
f.;r as the democracy is now con
cerned. It makes democrats laugh es
pecially must Mr. Bryan smile to
see Tedy In tbe coils of the same
old octopus that discolored the po
litical waters in New York on three
separate occasions to Mr. Bryan's
undoing. Now the democrats have
the glee and the colonel has the
The Why and Wherefore of Many
Why does a tu'Uier when saluting a
superior raise his hand to his head
covering? The beginning dates back
to the time of the Borgias, if not to an
earlier date. In those days assassina
tion was in vogue, and in order that
an inferior might not have a superior
at advantage the 'inferior was com
pelled when coining into his superior's
presence to raise h!s right baud, palm
to the front, to show that no dagger
was concealed there. From this old
custom our hand salute has come down.
Tbe salute with the sword was not
done that way in the beginning with
out any reason. When knights of tbe
crusades received their orders it was
the custom for them to call upon God
to witness their assumption of the
orders given. . To do this the sword
was raised to the front so that tbi
hilt reached the lips, when the cross
formed by tbe hilt and blade could bo
kissed and an oath registered to carry
out the orders faithfully. The drop
ping of the sword, point to the front.
Why In the funeral cortege of a
mounted ofheer or soldier is the horse,
saddled and equipped, with tbe boots
of the late rider placed heels to tbe
front in the stirrups, led to the place
of burial? To show by reversal of the
boots tbe owner's march ha3 ended.
We must go back to the days of the
Romans for. the reason why in the
service three volleys are fired over the
open grave of a comrade. Among the
Romans the burial consisted of the
throwing of earth three times on the
coffin. Three times was the dead man
called by name, wlih-h ended the cere
mony, and as the friends and relatives
departed each said "Vale!" three
times. So as a farewell to our dead
comrades we fire three volleys over
tbe grave. Then the service called taps
is sounded, this closing the ceremony.
Why should the cull taps be sounded
In preference to any other? Because
taps Is the call for "lights out." and
the lights of life are out in the com
rade wbo has "Joined -v the silent
bivouac of the dead." This ending of
a service runerai dates oacK to tne
early forties, but ) did"1 not become a
fixed custom till. late in' the civil war.
There was a .rason for causing all
wituesses before ' a military court to
remove the 'glove from the right band
before taking the" onth. ' Tbe raising
of the bands and eyes. toward heaven
when taking an oath is of great on
tinulty. When the Bible was printed
the bare hand was laid on tbe book,
which was afterward kissed. But tbe
Bible was not always at hand when
ueeded. So the custom of raising the
right hand and uncovering the head
has grown into general practice. la
in tbe paiuj iiyut uuud. aud for
this reason the custom of requiring
tbe removal of the glove came into
vogue in order that the hand might be
The colored silk sash long" worn by
officers of our army, which for many
years has ceased to form part of the
uniform, except for general officers,
was not adopted simply because It
looked pretty. It was originally in
tended that this sash, which was very
strong, woven of silk and . could be
stretched out to over a yard in width,
should be used as a hammock in which
wounded officers could be carried off
And likewise the gundy colored
horsehair plume that flowed from the
helmet was not placed there because It
looked so well. The original hair plume
bung down on tbe shoulders of tbe
wearer, and it was intended that it
should be a safeguard against a saber
cut aimed at the back of the neck, for
tbe long thick hair would turn the
blow and save decapitation or an ugly
wound. Today the little hair tuft seen
on the headdress of mounted soldiers
is the result.
There is a reason why the flag at
half staff, as an indication of sorrow,
must always be hoisted to the top of
the staff before being lowered. The
flag is saluted when raised and low
ered only 'iWhen it is at the peak of
the staff. So when it.is necesasry to
display it at half mast it must be rais
ed to the top before being finally low
ered, for at"this time the gun fires Its
salute, and either the band or the
trumpeters are sounding appropriate
music or call.
Twenty-one guns, the number fired
in tbe international salute, were not
selected at random. The number was
chosen by our government because it
was the number long used by the Brit
ish for their international salute. Why
the British used twenty -one guns was
no doubt due to an early custom which
had for a worship salute seven guns.
A fort was allowed to fire three times
as many guns as a warship, because
in those days it was difficult to keep
powder In good condition at sea. It
could be kept in good condition on land,
and consequently tbe shore battery was
allowed rf larger number, or twenty -one.
When the time arrived that better
powder was made and it could be car
ried at 6ea without deterioration the
warship was allowed the same num
ber of guns as the shore battery, and
tbe twenty-one of today are the result.
Major B. W. Atkinson, TJ. S. A.. In
FOR STATE OFFICES.
State Treasurer Alphana K. Ilart
Superintendent of Public Instruction
Conrad M. RardwrlL
I'nKersHy Trustees. Alexander I..
White, John J. McGlyna and Georce T.
Clyde II. TsTenner, Rock Island
FOR THE LEGISLATURE.
State Senator Peter Rungdahl, Sler
Representative Ileary L. Wheelan,
Rock Island county.
For County Jadg-e Albert Hober,
For County Clerk TV. D. nan, Port
For Probate Judge Dudley Marshall,
For Probate Clerk Thomas E. Cole,
For County Treasurer Edvrard t"b
For Sheriff Cornelius Donoraa, South
The Joke on Her.
The Friend Your wife doesn't ap
pear to be in very good humor. Hus
bandNo; she thinks I've invited you
to dinner. Jean Qui Rlt
For Holiday Gifts
There are a great
many people in this
part of the country
and, indeed through
out the world, who
when they think of
purchasing any article
of jewelry or silver or
gold ware, think of
Peacock's at the same
And this is the re
sult of these seventy
three years of giving
real values, selling ar
ticles of jewelry at moderate
prices, suggesting jjifts that
have been treasured for year
for their superior excellence.
Whether or not you desire
a silver purse, a bon-bon
dish, a lorgnette, a diamond
solitaire, you'll be surprised
at our moderate price.
Peacock sShopping Guide,
showing our full line, is a
very attractive book published
by us expressly for our out-of-town
customers. We will
be pleased to send you a copy
free on request. Write us
PesoDck'i Roysl Silver Polish U for nle
is your city at 2 Sc. iOe sad 7Sc a packics
C. D. Peacock
Importers, Diamond Merchants,
Stat at Adams 5l,
The Argus Daily Short Story
The Real Townsend
Copyrighted. 1910. by
"For the Efflnghams." I said to the
elevator boy as I handed him my
I was in a New York apartment
house for a call on some old friends
of mine. The elevator boy handed my
card to the telephone boy, who an
nounced to the Efflnghams that Mr.
Townsend had called,
"All right," said the latter after re
ceiving a reply. "You're to go up."
I stepped on the elevator and was
soon ushered by a maid in a black
dress and a white ruffled apron into
the drawing room of an apartment on
the sixth floor. There was no one in
the room, which surprised me, for I
was very Intimate with tbe Efflnghams
and supposed that at the announce
ment of my name the whole family
would be waiting to greet me.
It was fully ten minutes that I sat
waiting when I noticed that the1 light
shining through a keyhole In a door
opening into an adjoining room sud
denly gave place to darkness.
"One of the girls," I said to myself,
"is spying on me. That's a game two
can play at."
I got up from my seat, strolled
I about the room, looking at the pic
tures on tbe wall as if to kill time
while waiting, and when I reached the
door in question quickly turned the
knob and threw the door open.
There, kneeling so as to bring an eye
opposite the keyhole, was a young lady
I had never seen. Her face was crini
;eon. and after looking at me for a mo
ment she covered her face with her
I saw at a glance that not only one
mistake had been made, but several.
There might be fifty families in the
building, and there were probably
more than one named Effingham. 1
had doubtless got into the wrong fiat
But why was the girl peering at me
(through the keyhole? Perhaps there
ihad been a double coincidence of
inames, she knowing some one by the
'name of Townsend, or she did not
know any one by that name and was
;anxlous to reconnoitcr the visitor be
fore appearing. My curiosity being
(aroused, I resolved not to spo'l my
chance of enlightenment by giving
lanythlng away. I proposed to listen,
'not to talk.
The girl arose an'1.. still blushing to
'the roots of her hair, earoe forward.
' "I am mortified beyond measure."
'she said, "at being caught in such a
position, but you must admit that be
If ore receiving a call from the man 1
Jam to marry I would naturally desire
ito see him unobserved myself."
"The most natural thing in the
world," I replied, repressing a start on
learning that I was to be the girl's
"I received your note." she contin
ued, "saying you would call yesterday,
and later your telegram that you had
suddenly been called away. Then
when you were announced Just now I
was taken quite by surprise, having
expected that our meeting would not
take place for some time yet."
"I decided not to go."
"My act is certainly not calculated to
Igive you a favorable " Impression of
'me. I admit. .Tust think of a man call
ing for the Er3t time on a girl he is to
'marry, whom he has never seen, and
jflnding her peeping through a keyhole.
It's simply' dreadful!"
j "But becoming. To my taste, a girl
never looks so well as when blushing.
I "But there is no necessity for us to
stand. Be seated." She sank on a sofa
ll on an easy chair. "1 have fought
(against such a marriage, but my guard
lian. who has certain views for my
property, has finally worn me out Be
sides, be tells me that you are as much
interested from that point of view as
I. Nevertheless I have told him that
after seeing you if you were repulsive
to me the' matter should not go any
further. And that is the reason why
I was endeavoring to get a peep at you
before meeting you. - I Intended If you
were disagreeable to me even in ap
pearance that I wou!d after all decline
to receive you."
"Knowing this. I'm sorry I didn't
leave you free to make a decision."
"I should have decided to meet you,'
she replied to this, casting down her
"You mean that yon are pleased that
; these schemes for the development of
iour properties are to be carried out,"
iahe said archly.
i "I assure you." I replied, with an
Injured look, "that these property
schemes have nothing to do with my
I satisfaction at finding you in every
way so much more attractive than I
had hoped for."
There was a blush at this, not ol
mortification, but of pleasure.
"Now, I beg of you," I continued,
"not to speak further of this matter of
property interest that has brought n
together. Let us consider our pro
jected union one of Inclination alone.
Yet before doing so I would like to
get one matter out of the way so that
it may not influence us. Please writ
on a bit of paper what you consldei.
the amount of your possessions, and 1
will do the sane. We will exchange
these Daner and will both know what
we are to expect primarily from each
Now, I flatter myself thla was very
foxy on my part I was not sure but
that I would like to wiu this girl, .and 1
did not care to do so. rendering myself
liable to a "charge of deception other
than In permitting her to continue In
a mistake. "We exchanged the slips,
and it turned out that my possessions
were double hers.
"Why." she exclaimed on looking at
the amount on my slip. "Mr. Markney
did not tell me that there was such an
inequality as that I don't understand
why you who had never seen me
should have desired me simply on ac-i
count a rropertz consideration.
By Mollie K. Wetherell.
Associated Literary Press.
mine being but uue-Lulf yours."
"I said to you just now before this
interchange of Information that after
it had been made the sordid part of
this transaction should be dropped.
Now let us talk of other matters."
Ey 6kiliful management I learned
that the man I had been mistaken for
had gone away to be absent several
weeks and that no communication was
likely to take place between him and
Miss Effingham until his return. At
first I permitted myelf to drift on
Into the false positi i carelessly, but
now and again twin .es of conscience
would come to me aud. more than all,
a distaste for the denouement that
was sure to follow. At the end of this
our first meeting It was evident that
we were mutually pleased with each
other, and if we continued to be so tbe
wishes of tbe lady's guardian would
be carried out What these wishes
were or -how far they would tend to
her enrichment I didn't care. When I
arose to go she said:
"But you are not going before see
ing my stepmother and my half sis
ters. They are my only relatives."
"Pardon me." I replied. "I am rath
er shy of meeting strangers, especially
under the present circumstances. How
would it do for thoni to get a sight of
me the way you did through the key
hole?" "If you ever mention that again you
may consider the matter broken off be
tween us forever. After all, I think it
as well that you fhouid meet them
during a later visit."
"I'm sure of it. How often. do you
think you can endure a call from me?"
"As often as you like."
I wondered whether M'fs Effing
ham considered that we were engaged
and would grant me an engaged man's
privilege or. rather, expect me to take
it I didn't wish to presume so far on
a mistaken identity aud was go!u
away without ;t ki.;s. The laJy must
have considered herself engaged, for
she made it plain that no such cold
departure would please her. I took
the kiss, and. though it was Intensely
enjoyable. I felt; that I had received
that to which I was not ent'tled.
When I stepped out of that apart
ment house Into the open air I was
fairly overpowered by the chancre
which had coine over me since I had
entered It. There were pleasurable
sensations confused with horrible an-.
ileipations. What would I do during
the next few wpeks while this other
Townsend was nwny? Was I to try
to v.in the girl? I conned over the
question as to whether or no it would
be honorable for me to do so. There
were several points in my favor. In
the first place. I was twice as well
fixed in worldly possessions as the
other fellow. In the second. I had
found favor ia Miss Effingham's sight,
and sbe had yet to see him. fc-he
might on meeting him take a great
dislike to him. I secretly hoped she
would. I took pleasure in depicting
him in my mind's eye as a red headed,
freckled, snub nosed chap with the
forehead of an orang outang.
I went straight home, sat down in
an easy chair and tried to think of
some plan whereby I might come out
of the matter with eclat Instead of con
tempt, but failed to find one.
. yim.1 nurm mimi ii wm n m srnrn -
X -p.... GUARANTEED m
v " - " 1 '
I jSi jilt PL
f SLm ffw w-J
i Jiff lif"' !f)i
i m w.rs A aVIW rv. strsssnnBSBSannBBsnr
From the rprointlon In ol! of 1h "Phlp 5Wno"
from the suivptisful Muni, al .ineiy. "Madam
Cherry," Rhowiug the maie cbamctTK ns t!xv Tvimiil
appear dressi in Kirs-hluum Knll crd 'Winrpr
rnodels treading from left to rlglit) Savoy and
A CTOR folk must dress
Xwell, for the limelight
exaggerates the slightest
tailoring defect tremendously.
i,?? the Stage has become the Inspira
tion of Kirschbaum Clothes. Only the most
desirable effects are incorporated in Kirsch
baum Clothes, so that the man who wears
Kirschbaum Clothes can be assured that in
every essential detail hi clothes are " right
Prices, $15 to $35.
m Ask to see the Reggy ffodel, the specially de
signed garment for the young gentlemen of A mericaj
Price S21, made in a variety of fabrics.
or These Kirschbaum Clothes are guaranteed.
Should you find any defect in the cloth, any im
perfection in the tailoring, return the garment and
yvur money ipui pe rejunaea.
The Kirschb-.-im Style Book Sent on Request.
As B. KIRSCHBAUM & CO. &h
Makers of All -Wool Clothes Only
Philadelphia and New York
What would have been the outcome
had I not been pierced with an arrow
shot from the little god I don't know.
It would probably have been far dif
ferent from what it was. I vowed to
keep away from Miss Effingham and
the consequences of my first visit to
her. I kept my resolution by calling
the next day, and tbe next and tbe
next for two weeks, every day In
tending a confession and never making
one. Meanwhile tbe matter between
us was a case of desperate love.
I went to see my sweetheart one
day and learned that the sword sus
pended over me had fallen. I found
her in the room where I hnd first met
her, talking in an excited state to a
man wbo, as I entered, looked at me
scrutinlzingly. Miss Effingham, as if
to shut us both from her mind, sank on
a sofa and concealed her face with
"Who are you, sir?" I asked. "The
lady does not seem Inclined to intro
"I am Edward Townsend."
"And I am John Townsend."
"I am the Townsend. sir."
"Edith," I said, "it's all out You
mistook me for this gentleman, and I
permitted you to continue in your mis
take. All that remains to be done is
for you to decide between us."
"Leave me, both of you." she walled.
The other Townsend and myself nat
urally obeyed and at the same time.
It was an embarrassing walk through
the corridor and a miserable ride down
the elevator. I was much put out to
discover that the real original Town
send was a far better looking man
than myself. When we parted at thf
outer door we both raised our hats
politely, scowling at each other, and
went in different directions.
Within a week a little note came to
me addressed in a woman's hand. I
tore it open. It read: ,
Dearest, come to ma.
"Then I knew I was the real Town
Nov. 4 in American
lSl'i Stejttieii .iomuxjU i'l.-id. associate
Justice of the United State's su
preme court, born: died 1S99.
1S93 Eugene Field. Journalist and
verse writer. died: born 1850.
IOCS Toraas Estrada Talma, first
president of Cuba, died at Santia
go; born 1S?,1.
MUST NOT ENDORSE THEM
I'ostmaMrrs Warned Against Certi
fying to llonesty.of I'Htrous.
Washington, Nov. 4. "Don't In
dorse your patrons" Is the warning
given to postmasters In an order is
sued by the postofflce department. It
directs that In v'lew of the difficulties
arising through compliance with re
quests from patrons for indorse
ments, testimonials or guaranties as
to their honesty. reliability, etc.,
postmasters in their official capacity,
should not write or sign statements
of any such character.
The old. old story, told times with
out number, and repeated over an
over aain for the last 36 years, but
it 1s always a welcome story to those
in search of health There is nothing
in the world that cures coughs and
colds as quickly as Chamberlain's
Cough Remedy. Sold by all druggists.
Tr DVACAA M. SMITH
TT might help some people to k sens
of the proportionate value of thing-
If they could remember that the world
spun around on its orbit quite whil
before their advent.
The faultfinder has an easy Job,
but he gets no salary, much less grat
itude. Why strive for the unattainable 7
There ore more things within reach
than one can carry.
Never cry for the moon unless yoo
hive tbe price of an airship.
If a man really loved to work It
would probably be his luck to be out
of a job.
The person who is all thing t all
men doesn't aggregate very much.
It is hard sometimes to distinguish
between effrontery and frankness.
It is easier to give advice than to
take your own medicine.
The eternal law of compensation
should demand that our appetitea de
crease to help out in the difficulty
brought on by the high cost of living,
t)ut somehow the law doesn't aeem ta
The hope to be a millionaire
And live a life of ease
Keeps punhln us to stint our fare
And every cent to squeeze.
When wt arrive at that estate
- And hare a bunch of dough.
At every alleyway and gat
The money we will throw.
But now we have to pinch a dime
Until the lady there
Declares such treatment is a crime
And more than she can bear.
T.'e sock a dollar In the sock
And put the sor;k away;
TV'e savo our money by the clock
Kor that eventful day.
Alas, how seldom we attain
The grand exalted height
Where common people try to gain
The checks that we may write.
Borne crooked sharper comes aloi.;.
With smooth and oily tongue.
We listen to his siren song
And that's where we are stung.
The widest one is he who spends
Knouph from his supply
To keep things going at both ends
And lay a littlo by.
Whose nimble purse strings ar released
At call of child and wife.
Who knows that money Is the least
That one may get from life.
A Cautious Sport.
"We must catch that train.'' said the
man, bundling his wife Into a taxlcab.
Here, driver; get us to the depot lfl
three minutes aud I will give you 10C
'"But" rrotested his wife as they
were off, "it is three m!es to that
"I know It." snld the man.
"And through crowded streets."
"I know it."
"Then how do you expect him tfl
make it In three minutes 5"
I don't or 1 wouldn't have xnadf
him the offer."
Happy Go Luck,
msuswit t-M'ifJK A'-'fr "" Wm
"Yon are not keeping bouse?"
"Where nre you stopping now?
"Wherever the gnsoline gives out-
Matter ef Trade.
"He oonirs prrtty near being bald
bended." said the narcastic one. refei
rinc to a friend with a bright asphafc
path up one side of his bead anddowt
"He hasn't got any more hair that
the law allows."
How much does the law allow?"
"Thnt depends on whether you an
a musician or au anarchist."
The Uee of It.
"Mr. Blank has made bis mark."
"I suppose he Is married?"
"Well. I should think he wonld neet
some one to make'hlm come up to it-
"Did you ask the heiress to marrj
"And what did she reply?"
"She said she might try a coiTe"
Tondence course in matrimony wit?
He Is a Lawyer.
"He likes a trouble maker."
"Oh. I don't know!"
"Th y ?"
It gives him plenty to do."
The holders of the purse et at
Amid injustice cry for pear.
53'it Liberty, the versatile.
At last is talking Portuguese
Shall Women Vote?
If they did, millions would vote Dr.
King's New Life. Tills the true remedy
for women. For banlbhlng dull, fig
ged feelings, backache or headache,
constipation, dispelling colds. Impart,
ing appetite and toning tip the systt-rn,
they're unequaled. Easy, safe, sure.
25c at all druggists.