Newspaper Page Text
THJE AEGDb. MONDAY. MAY 25 1891.
. 1. 'I-
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Published Daily and Weekly at 1621 Second Av
enue, Rock Island, 111.
J. w. potter.
TRxa Daily, 60c per month; Weekly, $3.00
All communications of a critical or argumenta
tive character, political or religious, mm have
real n am attached for publication . No auch artl
tlclea will be piinted over fictitious denatures -Anon
ymous communication not noticed.
Correspondence solicited from every township
In Rock Island county.
Monday, Mat 25. 1891.
There is only one "people's party" and
that is the democratic party.
Secretary Bctterworth says that
every nation will be represented at the
World's Fair, even Italy.
The Blaine boom is growing. The
Harrison contingent will have to make a
hard fight if they succeed in killing it.
Fort Madison Democrat: It has not
been recorded that President Harrison
was presented with a tin brick made from
American mines wb'!e on his swing
around the circle.
Every year a layer of the sea, 14 feet
thick, is taken up into the clouds. The
winds bear their burden into the land and
the water comes down in rain upon the
fields' to flow back through rivers.
Russia is two and a half lint s as large as
the United States, and yet it has not more
than one and a half times the population.
During the past 10 years the population
of Russia increased fifteen millions;
United States, thirteen millions, and Ger
many four millions, two hundred thous
and. A Boston gentleman fond of decant
expression protests against the use of the
word ''hello" at the telephone,' as being
vulgar and a corruption and he thinks it
shoulj be eschewed. Ah! there, our es
thetical scholar. What would you have
us yell at the devjted 'central." Give
us a few choice classical plirssss which
would "go "in the city of cult.
The supreme court of South Dakota has
decided that half a lifetime is 19 rears
seven months and four dayB. The deci
sion was given in the case of a prisoner
convicted under a law prescribing half a
lifetime imprisonment, and who was sen
tenced to fifteen years. If the convict
had known as much before as he does
now, he would not have appealed. But
how the court reached the conclusion that
89 years two months and eight days is a
lifetime is not announced. It probably
derived its information from insurance
Dcbio.ce Telegraph: Dillon and
O'Brien, the imprisoned Irish leaders,
have comfortable quarters and make no
complaint of their treatment. Their diet
is regulated by a piysician, they rise and
retire when they please, ample oppor
tunity for exercise is afforded them, they
are well supplied with such books as they
desire, and both are in gocd health. Mr.
O'Brien employs bis time in writing an
historical novel, and has made consider
able progress with the work. The pris
oners are indebted for the unusal priv
ileges extended to them to Balfour's late
but useful discovery that the c.jnservas
tive party can make more by dealing
gently than harshly with the incarcerated
nationalists. It took him a l ing ti ne to
learn this important lesson, but he has
finally mastered it
TnE Keokuk Constitution Democrat
voices common sense in this observation:
No party can obtain ariy substantial
success in tti'n country which is based on
"isms" alne. This has been the history
of parties in America. It will m true of
the new putty formed in Cincinnati.
There are two great o!i:icil parties
which will control tbe destinies of the
United States, the democratic and re
publican organ z ttinos. There will be
no chance for another party until one of
these dies which is not all likely to occur
very soon. There in not enough in any
"isms" to produce sufficient cohesion in
the widely diverse political fads of tha
elements of the uew pirty. Tbe only
wav to secure r"il reform is to work for
it through tbe only medium of reform,
the democratic party, which battles t..r
it all the time.
A Th iff In it linn.
The late earl of haftlury once lost
his watch while walking in Wliiteclmpel.
He advertised his 1. ms lie vulued lis
watch for certain ti ociations. Within
twenty-four hours his household whs
nroused by a violent rina and knoek at
the street door, and the wheels of a vehicle
were heard hurryini; away in the distunce.
On opening the front door a suck wan
found filled with something that moved.
On examining the sack a bov of J he Artful
Dodger class was found, bound hand and
foot and teamed. Hound his neck was t'ae
mi&singwutch, and underneath was a pla
card with the words: "Lock 'im tip, my
lord; he's a disgrace to our profession; he
orter known as how yer lordship was free
of the wud; Kiv' 'ita five years 'ord. Yer
Friends." The earl did not take the ad
vice of his "friends." He reformed the
Artful Dodger, and eventually he became
light of tbe Loudon shoeblack brigade.
Tailor xnaan gowns can be worn only by
women who can walk gracefully. It is a
notorious fact that few women walk well.
And tailor made gowns can be worn only
by women who can afferd them.
Miss Isabel Ilapgood, the Russian trans
lator and lecturer, is a rather stately
dame, with white hair. She has a strong
voice, incisive utterance and delightfully
BILL NYE'S ANCESTORS
THEY WERE ENGLISH, HENCE WILL
IAM'S SENSE OF HUMOR.
By the Way, Any One Who Wants Some
Theatrical Noticea Address Edgnr W.
Nye, This Office lie Knows His Bail
ness See Sam plea.
Copyrieht, 1S9L, by Ederar W. Xye.l
Lawrence, Kan., March 14, if 01.
Mr. Edgar W. .Nye:
Dear Sir I have for some time been
a reader of your "esteemed effusions." 1
enjoy them weekly, and sometime all
the week. 1 have at times noted your
replies to correspondents and your dis
sertations on heredities, genealogies, etc
I want to make 6ome suggestions and
inquiries, and I kindly ask yon net to
strike back. I do not intend to be per
sonal. Last summer I took my outside s to
Europe. We were ten days on the voy
age across the water. I was much in-
T 1 -V
r i vtt MfiC
'rr-m a. .av ,-
OKE DOLLAR A DAY TO REDUCE WEIGHT.
terested in the signs upon the business
houses in London. So many of then
bore the talisman (tnore likely the legen 1
or fiction), "Purveyor to Her Majesty,''
or "His Royal Highness the Prince of
Wales," or "Her Highness the Princess
Maud." In gilt letters on all sides wero
the names of royal toothpnllers, old
clothes buyers, chiropodic artists, etc
Riding along Walton street, in an aristo
cratic neighborhood, of course. 1 saw in
: Mrs. b. Xvb. :
: Chimney Sweep. :
You cannot blame me for thinking at
once of my native land and our own
Bill Nye. Is this merely a coincidence,
or are you really English? Why is Mrs.
B. Nye not "allowed to print "Chimney
Sweep to Her Majesty?" Is it possible
that the queen sweeps her own chim
neys, or may it be that the effete mon
archy is jealous of the name of Nye be
cause borne by an illustrious American,
and hence will not patronize Mrs. B.
Nye? Can it be that Mrs. B. Nye is too
high priced for the queen? But J re
frain. You can see to what the subject
leads, and in your own good time will
relieve my mind of the clouds of mental
soot growing out of the above mo
mentous subject. Very truly.
J. D. BOWEHSOCK.
P. S. Have you been masquerading
as a Yankee all these years when, as a
matttr of fact, you belonged to the
Several letters are waiting a reply in
these columns, and I take this opportu
nity to answer two of them, requesting
the writers of others to be patient until
I can more fully inform myself regarding
the matters inquired about. It is very
difficult to answer important questions
without books of reference, and to carry
a library in a shawl strap while doing
one night business is a nuisance. I shall
answer all queries possible within the
knowledge of man and refer the balance
to Joseph Cook.
Yes, we are of English descent, al
though it is quite a right smart of a
while since. We were influential with
the government there. With the advent
of the (iuelph outfit the Nyes took a
long farewell pull at the public teat, and
with a tremendous sigh wiped off their
chins and began a course of persistent
industry at one dollar per day in the
New World in order to reduce their
My ancestors on the left hand side
coming down the family tree were also
purveyors to the royal household, and
one of the earlier kings used to buy a
whole codfish at a time at our place.
Much of the early English humor which
broke out at that time is now attributed
to the free use of the buckwheat flour
sold to His Royal Whiskers by our folks,
who had a place ou the road near the
Our people were given, of course, to
trade at that time, and one of tlieiu was
embalmer to the king, doing all of hi:i
embalming, undertaking and autopsy
work, which in those daj-s amounted to
a good deal. I have the journal kept by
this member of the family for two of
his busiest years, and 1 judge that times
were good with him.
It is painful now, of course. Mr. Bower
sock, to recur to those happy times when
we practically did a stiff business for the
king and charged our own prices. Ac
cording to the journal, 1 find such charges
as these, which show that the undertak
ing ousiness for many centuries has
been, to all intents and purposes, what
Aristotle characterizes as a dead cinch.
June 13. Ria Majesty. Dr. s. d.
To 'one ilay'a lime replacing vita la or
man who Incurred the royal dis
pleasure by ' ittiue sugar and cream
In bia consomme at table
To autopsy certifying that .deceased
came to hiadeatb by.natural cause. 10
To one gallon embalming fluid (or
To hearse anJ carriages Ml
To axle grease for aame B 0
To aix extra whip cracker destroyed
In trying to get home ahead of rival
Total 101 9
You can readily see that times have
, I T 1 Y
materially changed, when about the only
one of our family now in England is a
chimney sweep, and with no draught on
the royal flues at that We feel it keenly,
Mr, Bowersocb, and you cannot wonder
that we are, as a family, a little soured,
especially regarding royalty. Times, of
course, may change, and with his dem
ocratic freedom and practical notions the
Prince of Wales, upon acceding to the
throne, might give our family access at
the same time to the chimneys of the
royal house, thus making the Nyes once
more identified with his majesty's soot;
but we are not depending on it. We are
not selling out at a sacrifice in order tc
be on hand when the administration
The editor of tho South Hutchinson
Chieftain asks; "Cortld you write me
a column or so of 6tage gossip o foyer
nuggets for publication in my paper ex
clusively? I will see that you are prop
erly remunerated for samei, and if not
would be glad to have you come to my
house while at South Hutchinson. A
good room is always at your disposal
here at any time when my wife's sister
goes away, which she sometimes does."
Yes, of course I will be glad to write
you some items which may be of interest
regarding stage doings, but if they
should happen to creep into this paper
before they reach you I hope you will
not feel hurt. The following notes' are
given me up to date, and are gingerly
yielded to the eagle gaze of the public:
Charles J. Davis, tho eminent actor,
who has interpreted with snch wonder
ful accuracy for years the character of
Alvin Joslin, will present a neatly framed
lithograph of himself to the Players' club
early in the autumn. Also a three sheet
poster. Same subject
Mr. James Owen O'Conor will sail in
July for Europe to seek much needed
rest He will return in September, it is
hoped, mentally refreshed and ready to
rattle around in Mr. Booth's place nest
season. He still suffers severely at times
from the concussion, irritation and tem
porary deafness resulting from the
presence of some foreign substance sup
posed to be the fragment of an ana?mic
egg shell which he got in the ear while
playing Hamlet at Hoboken, N. J., three
Colonel John L. Sullivan will also go
abroad this summer, as he says, to get
Sardou to "sock a little pop and high
purposes" into his lines in the great
melodrama "Honest Hearts and Willing
Hands" Colonel Sullivan will return
in the fall, in time, it is thought, to
moisten his hands and elevate the stage
next season. He will also do all he can
to persuade Mary Anderson to return to
the stage. He is looking also for a new
play that has an unsealed doom in it
He says the old drama with the sealed
doom is getting passy and blaze. He will
get hold of a doom that is not subject tc
letter rates, if he can.
The leading lady in "The Clemenceau
Case" has been offered $2,000 to use her
influence during the season of '91-'D2
in forwarding the interests of a well
known firm of dealers in light ribbed
underwear. A bright little skit in
tended as a mild take off on "The Cle
menceau Case," will be on the boards
next season, entitled "The Downes
Case." It can hardly succeed, as in
"The Clemenceau Case" there is really
so little to take off.
Much pleasant comment has been heard
recently over the new and beautiful litho
graph on the letterhead of Mr. Percy
Mushrush, the bright young dramatist
of East Perth Amboy. It occupies the
upper two-thirds of the sheet, in the
center of which is seen a pile of vol
umes bearing on their backs the names
of Mr. M nshrush's several plays, includ
ing "Alone in Tompkinsville," "The Man
Teacher and the Claybank Blonde; or.
Where Have They Went To?"
Among these plays are interspersed
those of Shakespeare, and in the fore
ground of the picture, armed with quill
pens, may be seen Mr. Mushrush and
Mr. S. engaged in a duel, with the left
nand carefully inserted in the air. Un
derneath is the sentence referring to the
picture. "A friendly tilt for immortal
ity." Mr. Mushrush regards his letter
head as the most successful of all his
An enterprisingmanager of Toledo will
iitroduce a bit of stage realism in a new
L'ncle Tom company which he is organ
ising for next season. It consists in kill-
EARLY BIRD'S OPEXLSQ.
ing Uncle Tom in a brutal way each
evening and settling for him at the box
office. Several almshouses have offered
to s gn for the season, agreeing to fur
nish as high as twenty Uncle Toms each,
Highest of all in Leavening Power.
; ' ' " ,
provided their names are not used. The
manager thinks it will be a great card.
He will also discharge the Little Eva he
had last season and engage her daughter-in-law
in Ber place. His former Little
Eva will cel.sbrate her golden wedding
Mr. Shucknasty Fete, a Burvivor of
the Wounded Knee affair, who barely
escaped with his life by being in west
ern Montana at the time, will continue
to appear at Kohl & Middieton's muse
um m Chicago with the exception of
two weeks about Christmas time, when
he will appear and eat pounded glass on
the North Side for the benefit of the
World's fair sufferers. .
Messrs. Barney & Bradley will start
In next season with their renovated
Uncle Tom company, supported by an
entirely new folding deathbed for Little
The eighty-third annual benefit for
Little Petie, the child violinist of South
east Haddem, will be held at the school
house north of town in. July. It will
include a reading from Browning and a
greased pig race.
Messrs. Early & Bird, owners of the
"Singed Cat," a travesty on the opera of
"Tutti Frntti," have scored a success.
They cleared $80,000 during the season,
but will not produce it next year' owing
to ill health. They offer their scenery
for sale in another column. Also two
good theatrical trrnks, one valise and a
parrot, neither of which has been dam
aged to speak of. The ad. referred to is
signed Reduced Circumstances, care of
Larry Dogan, who cast a gloom over
the community last season by crushing
the skull of his adversary in a two round
go at the Palace rink, will star in "All
the World Agin Him," taking the title
role or any other role that is not riveted
to a fireproof building. He is rehearsing
his lines studiously at present at th-'-Inebriates'
Home on Long Island.
Miss Birdie Coonpelter, who has acted
as the Bearded Lady during an unpar
alleled series of yars, and with wonder
ful success, shows signs, it is said, of
yielding to the mental strain, and in Oc
tober next will shave and retire perma
nently from the stage. A farewell op
portunity will be given in September for
American breezes that have not done so
to blow through her rapidly silvering
whiskers. She estimates that over
3,000.000 people at least have been de
lighted by her genius. She is very anx
ious to quit the stage before her mind
In a card to the public Mr. Stetson
acknowledges that he has no proprietary
right in "Hamlet" He says he only
claims he authorship of a few of the
local gat t. The play itself, he says, is
the property of Mr. Palmer.
Mr. Napoleon Mnsser, who possesses
the wonderful gift of being able to sus
tain a blow of 300 pounds on the top of
the head, has scored a success this sea
son. He practically has the field to him
telf, and hopes to retain it for years to
come. He-says he notices no falling off
in the stage, and will write an article for
the Pan-American Review on "The Past,
Present and Future of the American
Stage." He will have a benefit in mid
summer, at which he has asked Dr.
Holmes and Millie Christina, the Two
Headed Nightingale, to appear.
Other stage notes for a future issue
will be gratefully received and printed
if O. Ked by the counting room of this
Doctor---You are in a very bad way.
Yon must take plenty of exercise.
Patient Please, &ir, I'm 'tip in a
boardin' 'ouse from C in the morniu' till
12 at night
Doctor Oh! In that case take plenty
of rest. Judy.
I have rot used ail of one bottle yet I
euffered from catarrh for 12 yeais ex
periencing tbe nauseating cropping ia
tbe throat peculiar to that disease, and
nose Heed a'most daily. I tried various
remedies without benefit until last April,
when 1 saw E'y's Cream Balm advertised
in 'he Boston Budget. I procured a bottle
rd since the first, day's use have had no
mure h!er-dinp tbe sorece's is en'irely
tone. D G. Dav dson. with tbe Boon
Budget, formerly with Boston Journal.
& Heal BaiEam ia Kemp'a Jlaitam
The dictionary eys, "'a balsam is a
thick, pure, aromatic euhstance flowing
from trees." Kemp's Balsam for the
throat and lungs is tbe only cough medi
cine that is a real balsam. Majy tbin,
watery cough remedies are called balsam's
bnt such are not. Look through a bottle
of Kemp's Balsam and notice what a pure,
thick preparation it is. If you cough
use Kemp's Balsam. At all druggists'.
Large bottles 50c and 81.
TJ. S. Gov't Report, Aug. 17, 1889.
J. B. ZIMMER,
-THS WELL KJfoWN
Star Block, Opposite Harper House.
has pnrcbased for the
Spring and Summer of 1891,
A largerand finer stock thin ever. These eoods will arrive in a few ilays. Wait ar. t s..e tt,
H. SIEMON & SOlIT"
toves and "yi.
IFTTIMIIFS, IN'AILS, &C.
Baxter Banner Cooking and Heating Stoves and the Geneaeo Cocking Stove8
Tin, Copper and Sheet Iron Work.
Taos sEnoyn w... rock tst, nd. ill.
Calf Goodyear Welt Shoes?
The best lien's fineshoe in the city for the
Second and Harrison 5ts.
Steam Cracker Bakery,
KARUTACTTSSB 07 CB&CXXKS AKD BISCUITS.
Ask your Grocer for them. They are best.
VSpeclaltiMi Tbe Ckristj "OTSTKB" and the Christy " WATER."
ROCK ISLAXD. ELL.
SEIVERS & ANDERSON,
Contractors and Builders,
Ail KIND 8 OF O ABPEJI TER WORK DONE.
tPGeneral Jobbing done on short notice and satisfaction guaranteed.
Office and Shop 1412 Fourth Avenue. ROCK ISLAND ILL ,
Successor to A damson & Ruick,
Shop Nineteenth St., ht.
GeneralJobbing and Repairing promptly dciif.
?31F"8econd Hand Machinery bought, sold and repaired
Agency for excelsior Roofing Company.
Cheaper than Shingles.
Send for circular.' Tck'phoce
GEORGE SCHAFER, Proprietor.
. 1801 Second Avenue, Corner of Siiteetth Stree - Opposite Harper'e Tbeaire.
The choicest Wines, Liquors, Beer and Cigars always on Kand
Tree Ltipch Every Dav
3. F. DeGEAB,
Contractor and Builder,
Office and Shop Comer Seventeenth Bt. t i T i A
. and Sovputh Avnue, t I IvOCK ISlaiin
V All ktnee of carpenter work a i erecialtjr. Plan, and estimate, for al! kind, of bai'3:n
forTJio3. q larjitcatiOQ.
ST. JAMES HOTEL,
Corner Twenty-third gtreet and Fourth arenae rock ISLAND. ILL.
J. T. RYAN, Proprietor.
Thi. honae has jn.t been refitted I throughout and is now in A So. 1 condition. It is a flrtt-clatf
gl.QBpyr day hoiife and a deirnb)e family hotel. .
Manufacturer of all kinde of
Gents' Fine Shoes a speciaitj. Repairing done neatl, and promptly.
A share of yonr patronage retpectf nil j eollcited.
1818 Second Arenue, Rok Island. 111.
CONTRACTOR AND BUILDER,
Bhop corner Twenty-second street and Ninth arenne. Residence 298S
Sirrj prepared to make estimate and do all kinds of Carpenter work. GiTelhim a trial.
STABY, BEEGER & SNELL,
Rock Island, 111.
First and Second AveDUe,
t. II. ELLT3, Rock Island. 111.
1035. Cor. Fourteenth St and Second Avi
Sunriwiglie Fnmtehednr Shirt Nntir.'