Newspaper Page Text
THE AKGUS MONDA1, APlllli 25, 1802.
THE AUG US.
rabllahed Daily ud , Weekly at 1164 Second
Avenue, RockIslsnd. Ill
THE WAYSIDE DSN.
J. W. Potter,
Tamms Daily, BOc ptr month; Weekly, $2.00
All eocnmaalcatione of a critical or argumenta
tive ciuuscter, tolnical or religious, mujl hare
reml name attached for publication. No uck
article villi be printed over flcllltoas signainrea.
ADoeymoDs eoaimatuca'roae sot noticed.
Oorretpondtriice toltci.etl from every township
U Bock Island eonntr.
BILL NYE WHITES TOUCHINGLY OF
THE NINETEENTH CENTURY TYPE.
M ok dat, April 25. 1892 .
CALL. IOR WKHOIR.4T1C MTATK
AOSVKSTIOX Or ILLIXOIS,
Headquarters Democratic State Central Com
mittee of Illinois, bberman lloace. Chic. go,'
Febmary K, 1W. A Convention of the Dem-1
ocracy of the Mate ol Illinois, ts hereby called to
meet in the Hall of the Hctise of Representative,
In t-pnnefleid. Illinois, on Wednesday April iTrh,
1892. at t o'ctook p. , fot the porpose of nonii
ttatrog candidates tone voted for on Tnesdas,
November 8th, IWi, for the office of Governor;
Lieutenant Governor; Secretary of Sta'e; Auditor
of Public Account; treasurer; Attorney gener
al; Ihrea Trustee of the University of Hanoi ;
T o Congressmen at Lanre; aiso for the purpose
of selecting one Presidential Elector from each
Congressional Dlttrict, and foor Presidential
Electors from the date at large. Two delegate
from each Congressional Jtsutct and eight dele
rate from the state at li .-ge to the Democratic
National Convention, to te held in Cbicaro. Jane
11, IfW. One rotate Coaamitteeman from tacta
Congressional Distrxt, and aevtn state Com
mitteemen from the state at iarge. and toeh other
bosicess as may (.roperly come before the con
vection. l he basis of representation for each
county ?hal be: One de.ega'.e for each four
honored votes cast for Cltvelaud and Thnrman at
the last Ptesldeitial Electio.. aedene delegate
for each f: actional part thereof, of two hundred
vote or it ore. IMier this call the represent aticn
of Rock Island county will be, on 3.614 votes,
Uy order of the Democratic tate Central Com
mittee of Illinois. Iialo P. Pbilfs. Chairman.
Tbio. Naxeoa, Secreurv.
The following resolution wa adonted by the
Democratic State Cential Committee, February
Ke it resolved. That it is this sense of this Com
mittee, that the Aot-ttalian Ballot law applies to
the election of offcer at the annual town n eet
ttgtoail elections excipt as specially excepted
in said law, and this committee recommend that
ail elections to be held for town officer this
sprirg. te held aider !h provision and accord ma
to the letter of said law.
1 be North American Review, id it
May Dumber, f urnishej, ts usual, iia
rich contribution to tbe discussion of the
leading topics of the dj. Tbe rounded
and ample ma.ntr in which imporUnt
matter are analvzed by men of distinc
tion, whoce pinioDs are authoritative and
to whom tbe public eagerly listen, give
peculiar weight to this icflueotial publi
cation. In tbe first article, "Tbe Man,
or tbe Party V S'goifcant, entertaining,
and instructive expressions of opinion
are to be found from Senate r. Qoav
and Vest, and from Representatives Bou
telle. Burrows, Wilson, and Kilgore.
Tbe demands for strong and upright
parly leadership as well as for clear plat
forms of principle are set for h. 0.hr
topics discussed are "Mexican Trade," by
If. Romero, tbe Mexican Minister; Con
tracts and Currency." bv Sjlvester Bx
ter; -Can We Have Cheap CabsT" by A.
J. Csssett; "Growth of Cities." by
Charles M. Harvey; "Twenty-five Years
of Alaska," by Iv in Petr. ff; and "Tbe
New York Trale Schools," by Col .
Ricbard T. Auchmuty. Tne array of
writers is noteworthy, and tbe topics are
of exceptional interest.
Hotel He Has Lived and Almost Died
. la A Bell Boy Who Wanted to Do
Hla Doty Putting- at Cat Off the Train.
A Maa's Letter.
Copyright. ir, by Edgar W. Nye.
I Lave just paid my bill at the Sinear
kase House, and my physician says that
the bites will all be well in a few days.
Toe Smearkase House is a relic of the
early history of the United States, "them
good old day" when people were per
fectly simple in their tast.es and got
along without underclothing. Those
were the grand old days when men
lrank coffin polish and licked their chil
lren into curvature of the spine if they
enjoyed anything on Sunday.
We often hear about them good old
lays when neighbors used to come and
visit each other for two weeks at a time,
f preading famine and other contagious
Te '-Rrrlprorit)" Mitoatisn .
Su Louis Republic
Except in years of famine in Europe
tbe Mississippi Valley's European trade is
held down to tbe lowest notcb under ibe
republican laws against trade with Eu
rope. Tbe fo.lowing table, giving a
comparative showing of our exports in
1881 and IS 90. with the countries to
which exported, is of treat value in
iso. ct of
Borope 755.39,565 677,34.365 SO. 14
bnlish North Amer
ican Provence.... 35.7n3,0Sl 3S.M4.4M 4.66
South America 4.9,i7il 37.74S.0il4 4 47
Asia and Oceanica.. S4.S13.TT6 35.SMU.453 4 2S
Weet Indies U7H,Ti 32,ls8 671 3.81
and Biitiah Hon
da rat ll.J O.COfi 18,11947 2.14
Afrca 4.5W,y 4.6M0.147 .55
Aliothep 9S7.998 9U6.810 .10
Totals.. 8S3 935,747 845.293,828 100.10
It will be noticed Here as a fact of first
importance lb at Europe on the average
for these two years took over 80 per cent
of our total exports, or nearly 20 times
as much as South America and foar times
as much as all tbe rest of tbe world It
will be noticed too that after nine years
of high tariff our exports are less in 1881
than in 1890. Tbe situation my be
graphically presented thus:
Valley of South 4 SO per cert
Ameri- an market 2S
Valneof European 0 li per cent.
To understand tne relation of ttiie to
vallty interests, it must be remembered
that Europe takes valley products almost
exclusively, while South America takes
chiefly manufactured goods from tbe
northeast, tbe Soutb American stales te
ins: a 1 egricu tiral i h a letB.populalicn
t :be square mile than we baye Near
ly all our exports are valley agricultural
exports to Europe, and under tbe high
ttriff these agricultural exports decreased
from 82 per cent of the total in 1831 to
73 per cent in 1890. This is a picture of
84 per cent of total
Agricultural exports in 1881 3SSSSS5 SSS)
74 per c ji.t of uttu1.
ngncuuarai extort in imw...... fpr
8 tier rent of t.; . .
Los of Valley trade 7
The valley not only fell behind in i
percenUge of agricultural exports to
tbe total, but the to' a! of agriculture ex
ports decreased in vtlue ftom $730,000, -OO'Jin
1881 to;629 000,000 in 1890.
This being the situation, the republi
can patty enters a national campattn on
the issue of lets trade with Europe for
tbe valley state- and more "reciprocity "
with South America for New England
corporations whicb wish to sell South
American farm rs their goods in excbince
for agricultural la material, cheaper
luan tbe same goods are sold in thj val
to SprioLucld and rnturu vii R ch Island
& Peoria railway, will be made for the
democratic state convention April 2? 28
and for 'he republican state convention
May 8 6. Tickets sold one day before,
good for return one day after tbe close of
convention. K r tockhousr, ,
General Ticket Agent.
SOAKEtQ THE CODFISH.
jt venile complaints among the children
ri ;ht and left. In those days papa went
ai d soaked a codfish in the creek as soon
as he had baited the visitor's horse. I
can see the wan smile of the large salt
codfish now as my grandfather took him
dc wn from a nail in the attic. I can see
aL-o his ruptured bosom full of rock salt,
an d I can hear him quarreling with the
otier odors of New England as he
started gayly for the brook. Even now
I see his low, retreating forehead ami
hear his f rairrance knocking the bark off
tho tree as he goes away where he can
sa-tk his head.
The Smearkase Hons is run by an
eli .erly man, who does better at break
ing colts than he does in editing a menu.
We stopiied here over twenty-four hours.
Rates two dollars per day and split your
own kindling wood. CJuerts wishing to
tal e a bath are requested to apply at the
office for roller towel and other facilities.
Af liathing guests are requested to re
tuiu mackerel tub to the office, as other
gu ts may be waiting to take bath. For
bell boy, ring two times and then go and
do it yourself. For meals wanted in
room, wring the neck of the large Shang
hai rooster in the back yard twice ami
cock same on oil stove. Fire escapes ou
this house are exclusively for guests of
the house. Any one seeking to escape
on one of our fire escapes and not patrons
of the house will be fired.
The other day at another hotel I was
robbed of my bathroom. Fortunately 1
W3 not in it myself. While I was at
tea the bathroom was purloined from
my room and given to another man.
Some of my things were in it at the time.
It was one of those bathrooms connected
wit 1 two rooms. The other man was
more profane at the office than I was, so
he pot the bathroom. I could never ac
complish very much by my profanity,
any low. I was taught at home to avoid
it in conversation, and so it often hap
pens that men who are gifted that way
get he bridal chamber while I am given
the sraicide room.
Thus it happened that when I returned
to uy cheery little cupboard, No. 808,
serits B, I found that some one had
6wir ed my bathing place, together with
a rich oriental bathrobe which I bought
two years ago at Ober-Amergaa of Judas
Iscaiiot. He was also understudy for
Pontius Pilate, and this robe was one he
wore while on the bench.
I vould not have lost it for a good
It is a glorious season of the year in
which to travel over our country and see
the t rown fields take on their living of
green. As the train pauses at a little
station the odor of the Maltese pussy
willow comes in at the window, while
far tway the ieculiar, happy hearted
song of the blackbird comes over the
April scented meadows. At the station
I see a lad stepping high, like a blind
horse, and I know that he is just going
baref ot for the first time this season.
His f-et are very white, whiter than they
will le again till next April, and he is
trying to sell a small tin pail full of
frogs' legs. The conduc tor says that the
boy vi ill close them out at a sacrifice, as
he hat been trying now for two weeks to
cell tl em and frogs' legs do not improve
Cro s in Ohio are looking unusually
welL Winter wheat under the careful
auspit es of Governor McKinley is look
ing thrifty and very rank indeed. Rhu
barb -9 looking very robust this spring.
Cowsl p greens are plenty and good.
Why t hould we enter into direct compe
tition with the foreign market by the
removal of our tariff when cowslip
greens are so abundant and the poke
berry reason almost upon us as I write:
Last week we stopped at the Cobb
House. I call it the Cobb House because
I am wary about giving the correct
name. A friend of .mine once wrote np
an account of this same house, giving
the correct name of the hotel and the
proprittor. The latter ran the house
then as he does now, purely by brute
force a ad main strength.
lie n in the elevator then -just as he
does now, by means of the surplus energy
of his butter. If he could get a storage
system for bis butter power he could
move boildiugs at a slight expense.
Sly friend wrote up this hotel, as 1 say,
anil toldthe truth about it. Then in the
rusn and hurry of busiuess he forgot
about it till two years later when some
thing brought it up in his mind. Some
thing gave his memory a slight jolt, he
fays. Memory is not located where he
thought it was.
He says he had to poultice his memory
all that summer. He thinks now that
he was reminded of the article by the
That is the reason why I speak of it as
the Cobb House. Some commercial men
who have tried it call it the Pest House.
That is a good name for it.
The ham one gets there always seems
to be what was left over from some other
man's breakfast. You have no doubt
eaten that kind of ham. I do not know
who uses his tablecloth when it is clean.
I know that he does not.
One day I asked a visitor who called
at my room what he would like, and he
said he believed he would take a brandy
and sarsaparilla. Brandy with a small
bottle of sarsaparilla, he said, is an ex
cellent spring tonic, and the sarsaparilla
completely disguises the taste of the
I rang and told the waiter to bring up
a 6eltzer lemonade for me and a brandy
and sarsaparilla for my friend. He was
gone quite a long time. We thought he
had gone out to the baseball game aud
we almost gave him up. By and by he
came panting to the room with a brandy
and a Untie of Dude's sarsaparilla. He
had tried three drug stores, it seems, be
fore he could get the sarsaparilla at all.
That's twice I have had the same ex
perience. Once Mr. James Whitcomb Riley, Mr.
Amos Jelyffe Walker and Dr. Franklin
Worthington Hays, of Indianapolis,
with two or three other friends, sat visit
ing in a room at the Dennison House.
Possibly it was my room. Anyway, dur
ing the evening one of the party offered
to extend to me the hospitalities of my
room, and so pushed the electric rosette
on the wall, and when the boy came we
saw at once that he was a new boy. He
had recently come to the city from a
small town in Indiana called Alick, that
being a nickname for Alexandria. The
boy was just trying to lie a bell boy for
the first time. He was more familiar
with the ethics of scalding hogs.
Everylody gave his order. Mr.
Walker said he would take "an Apolli
naris.' The boy was gone quite awhile.
Some thought he had gone home to
Alexandria to get something. By and by
he came back and bronght everytliing
except Mr. Walker's beverajje. He
could not get that. The chemist down
stairs did not have it.
"What did vou ask for?" queried Mr.
"Why, I aj-ked for what you told me
to ask for," said the boy, as be fell over
a china cuspidor and then scratched his
back against a welcome wardrole. "I
told him you wanted a pound of arus."
"Possibly if you had asked for half a
pound," said Mr. Walker, "you would
have got it. I almost wish now that I
hail said half a pound. It would have
So the boy went back to see if he could
get half a pound of arus.
We notice in our travels recently the
decline of the buffalo overcoat in the
northwest. It was at one time as much
a characteristic of tbe northwest as the
"unbonnet U of the sonth. Below Ma-son-Dixon
s justly celebrated line the
sunbonnet is remarkably prevalent,
yuite generally it is made of black ma
terial. The black sunbonnet is one of
the saddest things I know of. Especially
is this true if it has lost its vertebra.
One can stand the vertebra ted sunbonnet,
but not the other kind. In fact it can
not stand itself.
Tbe fiipflap sunbonnet, made of crape
or black calico and belonging to the
radiata or mollusk family, would cast a
gloom over a hanging and take away all
its cheerful aspect. The enervated sun
bonnet made of a large black pancake
that soured lefore it could "raise" is a
6ad sight. W hile I have been tempted
in my youth to sneak up into the fra
grant recesses of a freshly starched
white sunbonnet and linger there for an
instant, I do not think I could have done
so if it had been onf of the black and
nervously prostrated variety. It seems
so now at least.
The buffalo overcoat, however, is pass
ing away. Two years ago I noticed in
St. Paul and Minneapolis only seven or
eight of them, and they were almost en-
w .. V 1 11
PCTTLSO THE CAT OFF.
tirely bald. With the extermination of
the buffalo, I judge that the buffalo
overcoat will become more and more
difficult to obtain. I have reasoned this
out during the past winter besides doing
my other work. Thought comes easily
tome. I am getting . accustomed to it
now, so that it does not produce a nervous
shock any more. I am getting so I like it.
The soldier overcoat has passed away,
aud soon the buffalo overcoat will go.
The old gentleman wearing a large gray
shawl and a gimlet cane, carved out by
a convict in the state penitentiary, is
also fading away.
Yesterday one of these gentlemen got
, on the train outside of Cincinnati, with a
large black wor k basket capable of hold-
"Died 1 lis Boots
Is a common expression, but no man need
feel ashamed to be found dead with a pair
of our $3.00 or $4.00 shoes on.
The Philadelphia Toe
Is a favorite with the ladies, and we have
it in both shoes and oxfords.
, Ladies $3.00 shoes a specialty.
lug about a naif busnei. When we g j.
to Hamilton he slipped out at the rear
Tjlatform and opened a basket, ejecting
a large and melodious cat therefrom.
It was a tall, gaunt cat of the Theo
dore Thomas variety, and he had a wild
expression of countenance like John J.
Ingalls when a iwwerful electric light
strikes his siectacles just right.
The cat lit out down the track like a
long, black jiencil mark, and 111 bet my
Went Shore divideuds for this year that
he was in Cincinnati two trains ahead
of the old man in the gray shawl.
The following letter was shown me by
a physician friend of mine in Ohio. He
sends it to me to show that women do
not have a monopoly on the postscript
Shelby obio march eight Doc-ter sir t pot
one of your wmpk ts ou the trwtisof iuhaiiiug
rnedisins up the nose and was too see Mrs
baker who is a sufferer from your treetisJt
tbru them i am tndused to write you and a.k
off you your luwist terms off trvetis for we are
not able to pay murh a we have bin a puyiriK'
out A- navies oat for sickness fc still no better
so I thot I would write you and Rive you my
simptoms lirad ache paiu in che?t bronicle
tubes afected t-hort nos of breath with agouti n-l
of hawking and nervousness once in a while a
elite leaver and also ehiliness now plea.ne let
os no in next mail what yon think you can do
for me and the least you can do it for direct
to Shelby rirbliind Co Ohio
1;kj AUIN Kkipks.
ps am bilious and have bin all the time
have to take medicine all the time it t. my
vife ami not uir that in sick li Kkipks.
Isn't that just like a man, to go ou that
way all through tbe letter without stoji
ping for breath, feed, water or semi
colons, and then lay the whole business
off on his wife?
'oo noj.mns3U a-isijavua
aaij parretn sisqjo pj o j 5oojt ait
ooq jad oSI$ '3ud jo jdiixu uo ssudxa aq us
axvTtpp jo spaxptroq joj it anotrarji
oq ion prnoa eqa pari U9tnaauuoo
pjrtrj aoq aaojsq aX3IHi E.HaHIOW
pn 9jim. in--9881 3 a urL 'njATpo
'ash Hiuia qiihq mm
0LD ST H&tTZ ft S&HH8S9
Will Cur any
IT WILL NOT
It YOU TAKB
$ 500 Reward for aay
injurious anbuaoe fonsd
as wa say. Sert postpaid
on racaiDC of prica.
Twentr- Vi va Ceata.
NORMAN LICHTY. FAMILY OmimisT.
. Das Molnea. Iowa.
Fora1eb all druejrWt. "Hart 3t Bafinneu.
Leave Your Orders for
Corner Eleventh street nd Tenth arenne.
Tele hone No. 1231.
H. F. LAMP Manager.
Kl R OF. OIEFFEN BACH'S
ISMt CWE '' StViXal, tuHWlIS
" BSIkAlt? HSU BUS m3,
MIC3l-3fl ! U UIH. ND
MKCh MICieATlOrs III BsTCf R
TalKTf OX Cif:TMkT,bip.l-
ti- e), rvlter. tb. nrt r j. ho-M.
a trtal Lj imii nil for fl Clrro.r fin.
THE pem OKUC CO..
ALL KINDS OF
Cast Iron Work
dote. A specialty of fBrclelilng al. kinds
of Moves with Castice. at 8 eonu
A MACHINE SHOP
as een added waere ail kinds of machine
work will be done Mrst-cl&se.
NINTH sr. AND ?th AVE
DOWNING BROS.. Propts.
j, E.C. FRAZER. SjLSi-'i
I limni 1 - - " - tA'SF3?SSS
BeStsk urijd. in .P , T?TlTFf7W
SF.JIifilfi A"" vrtvta CUMB m thi, s,
"fSJJI'.Wtrt iteTgie itiT aiio $8SPsm
mr KK I kU MVLff, M.d for tbiaipxiOr
px..C.r.M tnmlw Sntum. niD r I.. . Mlk.
tar. IwiUhm tmrmt of Ftf-'iriilT tttrsofh .:l a'RAK
PARTS, minrint ibrmio Kt nl.lH mm ilMIRIll MSTRSM.TH.
Iltric C.rmt f .It Imi.mii,. or forfeit S5.000 I. emth.
vai.V H.....ary I'Mflr,. f. awl ... Tpnl rr, rr
pJfDBEI vcTBJCCO. iLu.u.i y 9J.IU-
c r i" tit
rTJHirM , Chicago, Minneapolis v.a a-
If KJlMaVn : Via lh Famoui .Kr. .
The . .
: St. Louis, l.:inneapo; s and s.r"
! Via St. looi. JliEOoa?o!:i 1 -
! Through Sleepers and Chair Cars
j " fcFT-.VLT.N-
..ur.i.im uiuuri(nil5 WiDST. Pwt
PEORIA, CEDAR RAP10S ANU SlOL'X
CHICACO AND CEDAR FAr.-3
Vi the Tmov a:vt- I"
THE SHORT LINE
Stcddard'n N?w Intellectnal
Arthritic at W. Trefz & (Vs.
. 2223 Fourth Ave.
3 TO 6 DAYS.
an absolute curf fo 1
WILL NOT CAUSE
STRICTURE, ask for!
Bio Q no pain, no stain. I
SULl IMSTRUCTtOlaS WITH EACH J
SOTTLC AT ia DOUOGISTS. ,
Central Chrtnlcai Co,
Cluoatfo a.l Vceria. i
T. H. THOMAS, Sola Agent,
Bock Itland. 111.
PI AK OS, ORGAKS, VIOLINS & GUITARS
Pent anywhere on 10 days
trial. Kreuilit uaiil Ixith wy.
beud for cautlov A price liM
THOMPSCN MUSIC CO.
ZO Wabat.li Aye, CHICAGO.
N. B.-gend ficto par pi.tam
anil we will nd 2 ie't
late m uslr f Rtt snrt our lunii"
eaulof Slieet Mu.ic and
buuks with cut rales.
THIS VSmt tlt'SB
!trH HEW YOHK.
V-jspi rit LAKE 3
.1111 '1. 1 V t !:' ' ..-.-
tieiil Tiek.-t :...i --
WllIT" (ilOUlit litl'l '-- -,
Thousands of rli.-i. -nr.""
Uv.il fcxciirsMii ":;-.
turn ;is to tir:ti-s--f U'iI :" '"
O.-m Tl. krt an-! I':-. A
All f til- r.i--i:;. ' lnf
thi liaiiwrtv ittf ' '
t'l... V i-li I '.I
are liKliMitli tin l-j;.-''.1
Mis, Tinif'l ..li.-. I.--'
f..i-niitti..n f-irr.i'..:-'! on .
Tii-Ucts on '"r I.;.1'
lKtlllS III til- L'lH"'
parts of tlie I ni
and to -a! iiuSri-;" '; "'
lnciU eol.iii.;i '' 1'"'"
c. J. ivts.
I,! 1 '
r the s-liMie ' . liMn.-
.,.l'l'n ! ,nr- - i
It is ma-Jis..--i , r;,; ', .'
in a ss. of ' ;
1..a It nftf I 1 t
lor tr. :iou r ...r- ' ' ., ,.r.;
pr.j. tyo t.
F -r f!e by Mti::