Newspaper Page Text
rnblished Daily and Weekly at 1CM Second
ATenne,4toek Island. 111.
J- W- Potter,
Tanas Daily tOe per month; Weekly i.00
per annom; in adracce (1 .SO.
all eammnnlcatior.s of a critical or argumenta
tive cheracter. political or rollidous, mnet have
real name attached for publ cation. No each
articles will te printed over flctuicus signatures.
AEoymons eommonicailctiB not noticed.
-Cvrtr "ondcn.ee solicited from every township
n Hock Island county.
Tuiisat, October 11. 1892
0f.hoirat1c katiokat tu ket
For r resident GROVE R CLP.VKLAXD
For Vice President.... AD1 A! R. STEVBSSuM
KorGovernor ...JOIISF. ALTGELT)
For Congressman at lar.e JOHN C. BLACK
For Congressman at Wrge.ANDKEW J. HUNTER
For Lieutenant Governor JOSKPH B G1I.L
For Secretary of State WM II HINRICHHSBN
For Aadltor DAVID GORB
For Treasurer RUrlTS N RAMSEY
For Atlorney General M. T. MALOS EY
For Elector, lllh Dist J II HAM KY
Fcr Cons ess, 11th I ist TRUMAN PLANTZ
For attmber Board of equalization,
H. R. BAKTLESON
For Representative, Twenty-first Disc.
JOSKPll II, MULLIGAN
Tor State's Attorney....
ror circuit ucm...
HOW TO VOTE.
THS NEXT SECRETARY OF STATE ON
THE AUSTRALIAN BALLOT.
Willi im H. Hlnrtchsen Writes a Pamphlet
of Instructions for Voters, Election
Judges and Political Conventions, Which
Explains the New Klectien Law Clearly
and Briefly A Valuable Work.
"The Australian Ballot" is the title of
a neat pamphlet just issued by the Demo
cratic state central committee and, as
itm name indicates, it treats of the new
election law of Illinois. The pamphlet
was writen by W. H. ninrichsen, clerk
f the house of representatives, and
Democratic nominee for secretary of
state. It is the duty of the secretary of
state to issue instructions to voters and
election officers as to their privileges and
duties under this law, but Secretary
Pearson's various cards, circulars and
folders on the subject have proved more
confusing than the law itself. His op
ponent, Mr. ninrichsen, has forestalled
his duties as the future secretary by pre
paring this pamphlet, which is certainly
the clearest explanation of the law that
has ever been issued. lie was clerk of
the house when the law was enacted and
' later made a tour of the state instructing
Democratic county committees as to its
workings. He certainly seems to under
stand the law thoroughly, for his pam
phlet which he presented to the Demo
cratic state central committee for its use
was submitted to several of the leading
lawyers of the state and it received their
The plan of the work is simple yet
thorough. It is divided into four chap
ters as follows:
1st. Nominating Candidates.
2nd. Duties of Election Judges.
3rd. How to Mark the Ballot.
4th. Miscellaneous Provisions. Pen
alties. Each subject is treated in its natural
order. For instance the chapter on the
duties of election judges describes each
official act in the order in which it is to
be ierformed. The pamphlet will prove
invaluable to election officers, especially
that part concerning the canvass of the
The feature of the work, however, is
the chapter of .instructions to voters as to
how to mark the ballot. The law is
quoted in full and then the different
methods of marking provided for are
taken up and explained so easily and
clearly that ona can no longer regard the
law as difficult of comprehension. Each
method of marking is illustrated on a
sample ballot containing the actual
names of the candidates, while on the
page opposite to the ticket appears in
each case a clear explanation of the
marking. This system of explanation
is so simple that any one can understand
it at a glance. We understand that the
pamphlet will not be for sale but the
state committee will furnish the chair-
man of each county committee with a
sufficient number of copies to supply
local committeemen, clubs, instructors,
election judges, etc., with as many as
A sample ballot of full size containing
-lie candidates of the four parties for
n a t i n n n 1 nnrl at a tf oflfir-oft torpor 1 ir with
simple instructions to voters has been
also prepared by Mr. ninrichsen. This
sample ballot in plate form ready to
print has been sent to every Democratic
newspaper in. the state that desired it.
Prom this plate sample ballots may be
printed in any quantity for instruction
"When a lady goes to a store to pur
chase pearl buttons she is surprised at
the high price the merchants ask for
them, but when it is known that this
class of goods are taxed 60 per cent, the
matter is explained, on every dollars
worth of buttons, the purchaser pays 60
cents tariff tax, and as most of these
buttons made in this country are manu
factured by convict labor, the tax goes
into the pocket of the manufacturer,
and you ladies are compelled to pay it.
liice, Stix & Co., of St. Louis, in an
swering a customer, in regard to the
high price of pearl buttons, has this to
say: "Answering your postal of August
4, we would state that there was no error
in charging the -pearl buttons, and our
price of $1.15 for the twenty-line pearl
buttons is the lowest that can be made.
Since the ' new tariff is in. force these
oods have advanced considerably, and,
of course, we have jto charge so much
more. -Charelaeton Courier.
The kist electric telegraph line was laid I
SwItcUM by-Lsage JnlTSJ. The
on transmitter was Invented in 1837. J
THE MAGNIFICENT PRESENT GIVEN
BY THE GREAT EDITOR.
It Is Called "The Kicker" and la Re
ceived with the Wildest Enthusiasm.
The Fate of a Man Who Claimed to
Be a Canvasser.
1 Copyright. 1893, by Charles B. Lewis.
The Fire Engive. Some three months
siuco we announced that we had ordered
from the manufacturer a hand fire engine
as a present to t his town. We d id no boast
ing or bragging, 1'Ut con teii eei ourseli
with atnodest announcement. After about
a fortnight our esteemed contemporary be
gan to sneeringly Inquire when "that en
gine" might be expected, and every week
since he has had a fling of some sort to
prove his doubts. Saturday last he was
DRAWN THROUGH THE PRINCIPAL STREETS.
paralyzed at the arrival of the machine. It
was drawn over from the railroad station
by eight horses, and no circumstance in
the history of the town ever created half
the excitement. Our esteemed old hyena
of a contemporary was positively speech
less at the sight, ne rubbed his eyes and
looked and looked again, and the only
sound he could utter was a groan of an
guish. The engine is named "THE KICKER,"
and aside from being one of the handsom
est affairs ever turned out is warranted to
be a regular Niagara falls for chawing up
water. It was run down to the creek, the
brakes manned by our enthusiastic fellow
citizens, and as a stream of limpid water
described a graceful curve through the air
and descended upon the roof of the Red
Star saloon a cheer of pride arose from a
thousand throats. If anything was want
ing to convince our esteemed contemporary
that we are solid in this community he can
no longer doubt. If there has been any
question in onr own mind that we would
be nominated for t he next legislature this
dispels it. After the squirting exhibition
we were placed on the engine and drawn
throngh the principal streets of the town
in triumph, and the songs and shouts of
the populace must have struck the soul of
our contemporary like a fall of 90 degs. on
a July day.
Pekfectlt Correct. Sunday afternoon
we were called up by telephone from Cac
tus Corners by our valued friend, Major
Scovill, who stated that they had just hung
a man who claimed to be a canvasser for
THE KICKER, and wanted to know if they
hail erred in judgment. We promptly re
plied that they had not. This paper em
ploys no canvassers. Whenever a person
strikes a community and claims to be au
thorized by us the correct thing is to dis
pose of him first, and then telephone or
telegraph us that he is no more. The major
and those who lent him their cheerful and
enthusiastic assistance have our warmest
thanks for the zeal manifested on our be
half. We shall not forget it.
GONE Hence. Monday afternoon we re
ceived word that James Stowell, of the
Bald Eagle saloon, bad been found dead in
his bed, and on hastening to the scene we
discovered the report to be true. While
the coroner's jury returned a verdict of
general collapse of the system we think we
know the true cause of his sudden taking
off. James was an ambitious man. He
didn't want to be postmaster, state sena
tor, a poet or a statesman, but he did want
to invent a new and thrilling cocktail
which should be thoroughly identified with
Arizona. In fact, he wanted to shine in
the cocktail line as brightly as we do in
the journalistic. The compound he was
after was to be known the world over as
the "Arizona cocktail," aud to be well
worthy of this great and glorious com
monwealth. To our own know-ledge the
deceased has been experimenting for the
last year with whisky, brandy, cognac,
champagne, cider, beer, wines, quinine,
morphiue antVvarious acids and drugs. On
several occasions he has almost hit it. His
own taste was to be the test, and we think
the collapse was brought about by the
action of so many decoctions on his system.
Either that or he finally struck something
that tickled him to death. He was not an
angel, but he was enterprising and full of
desire to help bring Arizona to the front,
and it is needless to add that we were one
of the pallbearers at his funeral Wednes
He Cannot Get Used to a Yankee Tele
phone. "I vhas shust out by der telephone office,"
said Mr. Dunder as he quietly entered the
station house the other day and was greet
ed with a look of inquiry by the fat police
"Yes, I go oop und haf my telefhone
taken oudt," continued Mr. Dunder as he
took a chair. "It vhas all troubles, trou-
FADDER, VHY WILL YOtT TRY TO MAKE
OUDT DOT TOP VHAS A JTANKKE?
bles, troubles mit dot telefhone, and I get
to tired I vhas almost dead. If .1 can find
some telefhone in Sherman I vhas all right,
but dot telefhone in English vhas too much
"What was the trouble?" asked the ser
geant. " VhelL dot bell rings und somepody says:
'Hello, Shake! If you can Bhtrike der
oldt mans for some sugar tonight,ome
oop und join dot game. It vhas ten cents
ante, mit a dollar for dot limit. Mabbe
yon win her all back tonight.! '
"'Shake vbas my poy, yon know. I cant
nmke oudt about dot telefhone, und SO
Then $hake comes In I ask him. He look! '
vhas all pecause you yhasnt over hers
long enough to be a Yankee. Dot poy who
telefhones you likes me to play checkers
mit him. He vhas a great hand to eat
some sugar vhen he vhas playing. By ante
und limit he means dot we play until 14
"Vhell, sergeant. Shake vh.ts a good poy
and nefer lies to me, but I can't make hei
oudt. Some odder time dot bell rings und
somebody says: 'Hello! Shake! Did der oldt
mans drop to anything, eh? No! Vhell,
dot vhas kind in him. I've got a pointer
(or tomorrow. Play Little Joe against do '
"Yhen Shake comes home I ask him how j
dot vhas. fie gets red some more, bul i
pooty soon he says: 'Fadder; if dot tehv
phone vhas in Sherman you doan' haf nc j
troubles. Ite means dl4 somepody coma J
here und say he vhas der taxTn&n una;
ehwindle you.. You vhas so innocent h
vhas afraid for you. Vhen somepody callq
me oop you tell him you vhas my fadder
rind dnan' ha.f tims to talk.' Sprffpanh '
. o ,
does dot seem all right to you?"
"H'm! It may be all right."
"Vhell, some odder lime dot bell rings.
und somepody Bays, 'Shakey, my boy, I've '.
thrown my oldt man down for a couple oi
cases, und will be mit you p. d. q.' Ser
geant, vhas dot der English language"
"It sounds very much like English."
"I didn't know but she vhas French ot
Italian. Vhen Shake comes borne I ask
him about it, und he laughs und says:
Fadder, vhy will you try to make oudt dot i
yon vhas a Yankee? Dot poy who tele- j
puvow tuts uui a wnuue mil uja louuer, unu
he throws der oldt mans down. He wins dot
bet of two cigar cases. He likes to coma
und show em to me und brag about it.
Dot p. d. q. means I shall tell you to look
oudt for a roan who comes aroundt town
mit a life of Columbus to sell for four dol
lars. He vhas a shwindler.' Sergeant,
does dot seem all right to you?"
"I can't make her oudt. More ash twen
ty times somepody, telefhones Shak
aboudt 'tips,' 'pointers,' 'gigs,' 'saddles,'
'straights,' 'flushes' keno,' and so on, und
eafery time he turns red nnd says it vhas '
pecause I doan' haf a Sherman telefhone. 1
So I goes by der office today to get one. Dei '
man says he vhas shust oudt, but he come 1
tomorrow to take avhay dot Yankee pees- J
ness. Vhen he is gone, und somepody comes
in my place und asks for Shake und says '
he vhas gigs und saddles und cases und
sugar I shall kiiow what to do. I take him '
by der collar und say: 'My frendt, I vhas
a poor shpeaker in English, but a great
kicker in Sherman! Let me help yon
shump ten feet und beat four of a kind!' " ,
RETURN OF MEMORY.
He Recollected the Man Who Once Saved
He came down the street lugging a tre
mendous big watermelon on his stomach,
but when he reached the freight shed he
turned aside and sat down in the shade.
About the time he had cut the melon in
two with his big hornbandled jackknife a
man who had observed him as he turned
into the alley came lounging along and
ran across him as if by accident.
"Hello! Uncle Jim. am dat yo'?" he
saluted as he came to a halt.
"My name, sah," slowly replied the old
man as he dug out a hank of the core
weighing about a pound, "my name am
James Erastus Johnson. I doan' 'low no
pusson what I nebber seed afo' to call me
"Ha! I'ze knowed yo' fur ten y'ars!"
"Has yo'? Did yo' cum to town dis
mawnin to buy co'nmeal?"
"POWERFUL CUR'US DAT I DIDN'T DCS
KNOW TO' BEFO'."
"Xo. snh. I libs right yere all de time.
Yo' gwine to eat all dat millyon yo'self,
"Libs right yere, does yo'?" repeated
Uncle Jim. "I fought I knowed all de nig-:
gers 'bout yere, but I can't place yo'."
'Hu! Who libs In dat yaller cabin on de .
co'ner above yo'r house?" I
"Can t dun place yo , sab, replied the
old man as he ate with both hands.
"Who works fur Misser Sutton in de,
cotton compress? wtio occupies ae pew
right across from yo' in de Baptist meetin
house? Mighty funny dat yo' can't place
"Yo' see, stranger," said the old man as
he bezan on the other half, "I dun full
down sta'rs two y'ars ago, an it bumped
some of do reekoleckshun outer me. I'ze
tryin hard to place yo'. Yo' has a pew in
my church, has yo'?"
"Of co'se I ban."
"An yo' works in de compress?"
"Hu! Dat 's powerful quare! Didlebber
spoke to yo' dat yo' knows of?"
"A thousand times, Bah. It wasn't an
hour ago dat yo' said 'Hello, Sam!' "
"Did, ch? How cur'ns! Sam! Saml
Was it Sam Parker?"
"Man wid a tall wife dat got a piece o'
glass in her heel last fall?"
. "Of co'se."
"Hu! Why yo' must be de man who
helped me dig dat well for Misser Rober?"
"An when dat well caved in yo' dun
saved my life!"
"Oh! I see! Powerful cur'ns dat I
didn't dun know yo' befo. Wall, Sam.
bein as I has reekolccted yo', an bein as yo'
saved my life, sot right down yere an help
yo'self. I'ze eaten the core all out, but I'ze
left de nicest pile o' rinds an seeds I eber
did see in dis community, an while yo' is
eat in I'll stand at de co'ner an tell ebery
body dat yo' has dun gone out in de kentry
today arter huckleberries!"
West Over to the Opposition.
"Sister Thompson," as the preacher
named her, had been praying for about
two minutes, w hen an old man began to
shout and clap his hands and raise a great
disturbance. One of the deacons went
over to him and cautioned him to keep
quiet, and he restrained himself for the
next three or four minutes. Then "Broth
er Jones" was called upon, and he. had
scarcely begun when the old man cose up
and shouted: . - -
i "Dress de Lawdt'but I can't bole myself
back when I heah B rudder Jones axln to
be forgiven fur his sinful ways!"
He was cautioned again and sat down
and restrained himself to an occasional
"Amen!" but when "Sister Brown" be
gan to plead that all sinful white folks
might turn from the error of their ways,
the old man broke loose and boiled over.
One of the deacons took him by the arm
and led him out doors and down the street
a piece, and was about to leave him when
Uncle Reuben asked:
"Boy, what yo' dun fussin wid' me furf
'Too much noise, uncle," was the reply.
"Doan I belong to dat church?"
'Yo' does." " x
"Is it agin de rules of de church to git
ccite4 n shont fur de blessed caufce of re
ligun?". 1t - 4
NoYsah." t .,
"Does yo' flnd.it anywhar In de Bible
dat I can't shout fur de salvashun o' sin
"So, eah.Mv r
"Den what yo' dun pull me out yere
furf" X - ,
''Rase we's got to draw de line. Uncle
"De line on pew rent. Yo' is owin dis
church 'bout $3,000 pew rent,; Tjncle Reu
ben, an de disconslstency o' yo'r standln
up an shoutin looks so previous dat de
deacons hes coincided to disconnect yo' an
run de risk o' all de white folks bein
burned up wid flah an brimstun'l"
He turned on his heel and entered the
meeting house, and after gazing at the
building for two or three minutes in si
lence the old man slowly observed:
"Dat eands me up wid de Methodist re
ligun, an drives me plumb into de arms o'
do Baptist forevahmo'l"
It Was Business.
About 10 o'clock in the morning two
colored women rode into the town on a
mule to do some trading at a store, and it
wasn't over half an hour later that I ran
across the younger one on the platform of
a cotton warehouse, walking hand in hand
with a colored num. He let go of her, and
followed lae down the pliitform to say:
"Seed yo' grinnin, boss, an I thought I'd
'splnin dat it was a case of luv at fust
sight. I war jist took wid dat gal de
fust minit I sot eyes on her, an I reckon
she'll dun promise to marry me befo'
noon." s ;
Soon after 12 o'clock J went down to ti.o
depot to see about a train, and found ti.o
man sitting on a salt barrel with the otht r
woman, while the first was standing beside
the mule under a tree across the street.
The pair on the barrel were billing and
ccoing, hnt as I entered the depot the man
followed along to say;
"lletkon to' am sorter surprised ober de
"Rather. You were courting the daugh
ter two hours ago."
"Dat's n fact."
"And you said it was a case of love at
"Well, why did you drop her for the
"Dey am mudder an darter. Rah."
"W;iil, I dun found out dat de mudder
owns di.' mewl, sah."
Turnips All Right.
He stood at the extreme point of Pros
pect park, Niagara Falls, watching the
mighty flow of waters, and his ears filled
with the tremendous roar from the abyss
below. He seemed magnetized by the rush
and appalled by the sounds. Men who
watched hi:n saw his face undergo a great
transformation as t bo grandeur of nature
waft thus brought in contact with his very
soul. All of a sudden one of the observers
stepped forward, touched his arm and led
him back a fw stf ps, and asked:
"Say, old man, how do you think tur
nips are goini; to turn out this fall?"
There was a general murmur of indigna
tion at this exhibition of sacrilege, but
the old mr.n'b f:;ce lighted up, and he
heaved a si;j;h of relief us he answered:
"I guess they'll t:irn out purty fair, con
siderin, end I'm glad you spoke to me. I
was gittin go.sli dr.rned tired of seein this
thing make siclt an infernal fuss fur
nothin! Iel's sit down soinewhar whar
we kin whittle and talk!" M. QUAD.
to Genuine Ji&r
o f(fi ri aii nriM u
is and will ever be the
flvii Trifltipn rn. Bacfcaclie.
Pains in the Side. Chest and
Joints, Neuralgia, Sprains, &c.
Before yon need to ony, oDiain
rw-rrnpe ne CHARCE"
the valuable book: "Guide to Health,"with
endorsements oi prominent puysiouuia.
a r r r ess:
F. AD. RICHTER & CO.,
17 Warren Str.
Prize Medals Awarded !
European Houses: Bndolstadt, London.
Vienna rraguc tja,c'fcirv.iiv a
iinxeuiuvrca ikuunkoiui aioiuiuwt
25 & 50 Cts. a bottle, For Sale by
sobs: von xcesbitz.
4 ""iiT other droecis1-
' Ask rour Drucei.it for a
bottle of Hia ti. The onlv
' nryn noimanouM mmedv for all
' the unnatural discharges and
I private diseases of men and tbs
debilitating weakness peculiar
to vomen. it cures in a lew
idays without the aid or
i publicity of a doctor.
Th t'mtvrsal American Our.
kThe Ivans Car meal Co.
v. m. a.
FOB BJ OHLV!
for I.OBT or FH.15Q MtlTgWB, .
General and NI3.V0U 3 DEEILTTT,
Wcakaesa of Booy and Mind, Effects
of Errors or ExcaaKS i a Old or Toon.
SmUr BAD HOOD fall, RnliMriL Umr la Katam aa.
SUfaj.jCBilUk.CllllKf RUlrKS IIICI.A 3 HA rAnnwani 1
anl.T aafalllair HUB K TKKJTBIt.VT Hrmrfm Im m Say,
SmilU, Baak, natoaaltas aa4 ma aialtrd (aialrs)fNaa
ERIE MEDICAL CO.,BUrFALO,li.Y.
CT V V ft. " t
II ji in 1 1 1
It m-l FT El
Ride a cockhorse . m
Chicago of course jo get
AND WASHING THE CLOTHES.
ASSURE IT A WELCOME '
-WHEREVER IT GOES.
flam ciab soap
15 THE BEST FOR EVERY HOUSEHOLD USE.
ALL GROCERS KEEP IT.
DEL ONLY BY
CKBTAUI ADVEBTTSEMENTB FROM TRADE RIVALS wfc Nr tfc phm
In AJnrlcvrat-ln hvirJiw afa:-t ft.
and Fpeftl to tb attior!t j f,f
Van Houten's Cocoa
D,.SVDim anUB. PmI. at SeaUba al ValnnUr Col !. LMdaa. A.tkor efth.
lulirf "InltMharTlMiipMim," whoeJl "rilrt llwa, From lhr.r,(-j
7T. .,.. i. 1. ol, mora Bntrltloaa than other Coooaa. It Is eertalnl7 "Pare - and hlhl, dic-.ti'J-. - , .
anolatlcM In certain adrertuementa from mj book on Therapeotlca are quite mlaleadln. and con .t p .m.,i . ,: .
flU mmlhmm Hmt a tjp, , hmOmh, trnrn primp ft- m eery - ' '
Patronize Home Industry and Protect the Labor of Air erica
- MERRICK'S SPOOL COTTON. -
It Is Six.Cord Soft Fir lh. Toll treasure, and is equally troll adapted for Hand and Mscl. r 'i
Sewing. For sale by
ai d Dry Goods roner- generally.
MERRICK THREAD CO., 205 Fifth Avenue, Chicago
$4.00 per Month for Ten years,
or$6.Q0 per Month for Six years
Pays Principal and Interest and seeures you
a Deed with Abstract of Title.
ON EACH PLAN. LOCATION 38th ST.
PRICES WILL BE ADVANCED. -
Come early and secure choice locations and lowest prices
BUFORD & GUYER'S Addition.
Apply to J. M. Buford or E. H. Guyer.
And Dealer in Alen's Fine Woolens.
1706 Second Avenue.
1803 Second Avenue.
B. F. DeGEAH,
Contractor eifici Builder,
Office and Shop Corner Serenteenth 8V. . . 'Rlr- Tclanrl
and Seventh Arcnuo. : ' 1VOCK ISianu
VA.11 kinds of carpenter work a specialty. Plans and estimates far all kinds of baildl-H
farnlanoa on application.
nntmooD restored .sits
ten rartec to enre all nnrvons diseases, such as Wf Mp'
Loss of Brain I'otrer. Headache. Wakefulness, ljost Manhood. Ninnuv ! !
sions. Kerroiianess. Lassitude, all drains and loss of power tf the i-m-ra. i - r
Ori:ans In either sex cauaeil l over exertion, yonlhlul errrx,r ;x'.'- ; '
1 ose of tiacco. opium or stimalimts wbicbsnnn lead o iDnru.ii. ."" .j
;Jtlon and insanity. lut up o-nvenientM entry In tt jkm-Wpv. ( "
axe 1 7 II ' M i ; it n r re. v 1 1 u rrrrjai unier wt? (it- m h'mhi i. , ,
serosa it arrsB vbisu. rcJunA the money. Circular tree. dlress Kent 8eecl Co., Culcao.
For Mle Sa Rock island by Harts & Bahnsen. Sd Aye, 'and 20lh street
" - -AmTlrJ 11- -ataSaTT - l r aWa
avenport Business College,
COMPLETE IN AT.T. DEPARTMENTS.
FOR CATAlrOGUE ADDRESS
J. C. DUNCAN, Proprietor.