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.; i wid Co. Strictly Pure White
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i blending Brand
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, l'r -portions Analyzed hy
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u. a. a.
loose Raising and Moving-
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Addrsss E. A. ROUNDS.
1515 Seventh Avenue, Box 131.
THE WOMAN'S NOVEL.!
SECRETS NEViR BEFORE REVEALED
TO THE COLD KJBLIC.
How to Secure Characters and Carry Them
Through Lava, Flirtation and Jealousy
the Chief Iag-edlenta The Useful Cow.
Newspaper Fnenda. ' '
I never knew l ow a woman constructed
that strange ai d wonderful creation "a
woman's novel, until I accidentally over
heard the follov-ing conversation between
Mrs. Kate Jenkins Shyster and Mrs. Gertie
"Do you know. Gertie." began Mrs. Kate,
I ve written a real novel at last, and It's
the dearest thinn you ever saw? I've got
the loveliest man in it. He's an artist and
awfully clever a id very polite and nice."
"I've put Mr. Sterr.s into my new novel,"
answered her Mend.- "You know him
that awful prig who fell in love with me
when we were at the beach last summer.
Didn't I wind him round my little fineer
"My hero," w nt on Mrs. Kate, speaking
of her own book, "meets a lovely girl down
at the beach. You know how Mr. Throck
ton met Jennie Sturgis last summer and
flirted her allar.und? I never put real peo
ple into books, but I couldn't help thinking
of her. I descri ed those lovely moonlight
nights, and I nutde him kiss her on the sly,
which she never noticed. Do you know, I
saw Mr. T. kiss Jennie on the cheek, and
she paid no mor-j attention to it than if he
had been been brushing off a fly.
"I made Mr. Sterns fall in love with Jen
nie too. You kn iw she had a flirtation with
him before Mr. Throckton and you came
down. It was nothing but a flirtation. She
never let Mr. Sterns kiss her no, I can tell
you, t hough she made him want to so much
he could hardly stand it. I don't think she
is quite such a f irt as I made her out in my
novel, but I wa ited a good, cold blooded
flirtation, and I had to, you know."
There was a s ight pause afterthis. Then
Mrs. Kate went on:
"When I got through with them at the
beach, I didn't know what on earth to do
with them. I meant to keep them oft and
on, you kuow, till the end of the book and
then make them get married, but I had to
do something to amuse the readers in the
meantime. I'vn heard that if you put a
certain number of people together they will
be sure to do something. So at last I
thought I would introduce a lot of horrid
people and just a fairly nice girl or two and
see what they would do. So I put in littlo
Fanny Baxter, you know, and old Stanton,
who was so cross to me, and Grandma Gillis,
who whined all the time when we were over
at Long Brand, and that timid little wom
an who never f-poke to anybody. It took
quite a while to describe all these people,
but when I got them described 1 simply
had to make ; hem do something, and I
didn't have room. So I concluded to write
the thing ull over and leave out a few."
"I never havt any trouble of that sort,"
said Mrs. Gerti "I always have six peo
ple two marr;ed, two engaged and two
who simply Aire. First t hey llirt with each
other, then wilh the married people and
then with the lovers. They make them
break their engagement, and they make
one fall in love wilh one of the married peo
ple, and that n akes a scandal. Oh, I have
no trouble with my plots at all!
"But my trouble comes in putting in the
moral conversation, you know, and talking
about politics i.nd Bellamyism and the fu
ture of the novel in the United States and
all that. I never think of putting that in
the first time I write it out until something
clever happens to come to me. But gener
ally I wait until I'm done with the plot of
the story, and then I ask some gentleman
I know to give me some notes on the topic
I want, and I write up some discussions
and put them in separate chapters. Once
in awhile I put it in the ordinary conver
sation, but I don't like that because some
people do not enjoy that sort of thing, and
ii it is put in separate chapters they can
skip it easily, while if it is in the middle of
a nice love dialogue it makes them mad, for
they don't know how far to skip, and they
want to get to the love, you know. I don't
blame them at y, for I should do just that
myself if I were reading a novel. But peo
ple talk so you have to put that learned
stuff in. The newspaper critics are sure to
discuss it, ami that advertises the book
"I never coild do that," replied Mrs.
Kate. "I often regret it. People call me
light and frivolous, and I know I'm not a
bit more frivolous than you are, and they
call you 'strong and virile.' Oh, dear, 1
wish I could d i it!
"But I made my novel end in just a love
ly way. It all came about through a cow.
She got frightened and threw herself in his
"Who? The cow did!"
"The girl, of course. You needn't make
fun of me."
"I was just wanting to give you a lesson
in English. You know the use of language
Is a very important thing. I've studied it
awfully hard, and some of my gentlemen
friends usually look over my stories to see
if. I've made any horrid mistake in gram
mar or rhetoric. The newspaper men are
used to that sort of thing, you know."
"I wish I t new some newspapermen,"
cried Mrs. Ka e dolefully. "All the people
I'm acquainted with are nice folks gentle
men, you kno "
"If my newspaper friends are not gentle
men, then I'm not a lady, and you had bet
ter get right cut of here."
"Oh, I wa- saying I wish I had such
friends. It would help me any amount.
Only I don't seem to have the tact to at
After this t aere was a long pause. Then
Mrs. Gertie st id meditatively:
"Kate, do 3 ou suppose we shall be fa
mous after wt die, like Thackeray and Scott
and Shakest -eare? One gentleman told
me he thought I was the leading light of
my age. And why shouldn't we of this age
be just as far ions as those horrid men were
of the last ag it When this gets to be the
last age, won t we be the big lights then?"
"You are jerfectly sacrilegious, Gertie!"
exclaimed Miu. Kate. ''Think of comparing
yourself to Tiiackeray."
"But you c in never tell. I suppose any
of us may turn out immortal. You can
bever tell till after you're dead. Oh. dear!"
Philadelph a Press.
Where Kose Terry Cooke Failed.
The late Kose Terry Cooke had an amus
ing as well as an annoying experience in
an attempt to figure as a philanthropist.
She became much interested in the condi
tion of the factory operatives in LeuWiu
k ted home and much exercised over the
subject of their inconvenient, uncomforta
ble and unduly expensive homes. Finally
she built a number of model cottages and
offered then, at nominal rent to the class
she wished to benefit. It was the old story
of leading the horse to water over again.
The 'cottage stood empty through all the
remaining yi are of Mrs. Cooke's life. New
THE ARGUS, MONDAT . AUGUST 7, 1893.
FOR BARGAINS OR FOR CHARITY.
llow Wily Secondhand Dealers Appeal to
Both These, Unman Motives.
The observant pedestrian along any popu
lous east or west side street knows what it
is to see piled up in apparent confusion
the household effects of some distressed
tenant, dispossessed for nonpayment of
rent furniture, bedding, kitchen utensils,
cheap pictures, crockery, a clock, and a
birdcage. Where a landlord secures sum
mary possession through the act of a mar
shal of dwelling apartments the personal
property of the tenant is put upon the side
walk as the most convenient, accessible and
public place. Uusually the tenant has
somewhere else to go. Seldom do his effects
remain long in the street, for there are al
ways, especially ia the poorer parts of the
town, helping hands to give him or her a
friendly lift or a new start.
Then a truckman comes to take away
the articles left upon the sidewalk, and
the neighbors hear of the matter no
more. This benevolent strain of human
nature in New York has, however, inspired
the cupidity of some secondhand dealers,
who now make a regular business of dump
ing their unsalable stock in a public place,
pretending that the art icles thus displayed
belong to some needy dispossessed tenant.
The sympathetic wife or daughter of the
secondhand dealer stands in the vicinity of
the articles, and when the charitably dis
posed stranger makes his appearance this
is about what he h-ars:
"Poor soul! A widow with seven chil
dren, her husband dead in the hospital aft
er being out of work for three months
where would she get the money to pay the
landlord and save her furniture from the
street? Well do I remember her paying
$20 for that bedstead there when she moved
into the top floor beyond a bedstead which
she would be glad enough to take $10 for
now to buy her children something to eat.
And those chairs there, which cost $1 each,
she'd be only too willing to sell for a quar
ter apiece; and that fine old fashioned clock
lying there it's a splendid timekeeper,
and any dealer would pay 5 for it gladly
and the poor woman is willing to take $2
for it if she could only find a kind hearted
purchaser to buy it. while she is out looking
for help from those who were glad enough
to borrow money from her husband when
he was working!"
Such a tale of commingled human sor
row and business opportunity told, for the
first time, to a sympathetic stranger is not
usually without its effect. "My good
woman," says the male passerby, "here is
a couple of dollars for the widow my good
wishes go with her." The female passerby,
too, is touched by the recital, and the
chance of often getting a bargain loosens
the clutch which she has on the money
which she holds in her hand. She buys
such of the articles as her means afford or
which seem cheapest and next seeks the
good offices of some neighboring truck
man or expressman to transport the arti
cles to her home. Then the secondhand
dealer replaces the articles Bold by other
articles of a similar kind from his shop,
and his wife waits the arrival of another
favorably disposed purchaser.
This dodge has been worked quite gener
ally and quite effectively of late in various
parts of town, and it is always to be no
ticed that a second hand furniture store is
at no great distance from the point where
the articles are left, and a well traveled
thoroughfare, not a side street, is selected
for the purpose, although it is well known
that evictions for nonpayment of rent are
very rare on the big thoroughfares, where
the rents are higher, and are almost exclu
sively limited to the smaller side streets of
neighborhoods. New York Sun.
W hy Simpklns Was Shook.
"Simpkins, you know," said the fat man,
"has an idea that he's a wit, and he's all the
time springing gags on people he knows.
Most of them is chestnuts, but once in a
while he gets off a new one. He got off a
new one to his girl the other night, and
that's why he lost her. It seems that he
was up to her house, and they were sitting
out on the veranda. She got to telling him
about an adventure she bad that afternoon
when she was down town. It seems that
she was coming along Main street up by
Tupper, and a little poodle dog ran across
the street with a policeman after it. Just
as it reached the middle of the street the
policeman pulled out his pistol and fired at
it. The ball went through the dog's lungs,
and it dropped over dead.
"The girl was telling this, and she said:
'When I saw that poor little thing lying
there dead, I just couldn't help going over
and picking him up. It seemed too bad to
have a great big brute of a policeman kill
such a lovely little dog, and I told him so.'
Bight there is where Simpkins got in his
fine work. 'You picked him up?' he asked
her. 'Yes,' says she. 'And he was shot in
the lungs?' he askeA again. 'Yes,' says she.
'Well,' says Simpkins with a sober face,
'that wasn't quite the right thing to do,
was it?' 'I should like to know why?' says
the girl. 'Because,' says Simpkins, 'if he
was shot in the lungs, he had a hole in his
"That settled it with Simpkins," contin
ued the fat man. "The girl shook him then
and there." Buffalo Express.
She Had Seen the Wild Man.
An attempt at a practical joke which had
some real humor in it and which resulted
in a laugh for all hands was that which,
according to an English newspaper, a cer
tain Mr. Krewskin endeavored to play up
on his wife. This story is to the effect
that as Mr. Krewskin was going home one
day at noon he saw the wagon of a travel
ing photographer standing by the roadside.
"I will stop and have a few pictures taken
just for fun," he mentally remarked, enter
ing the establishment. He was as good as
his word. He sat for his pictures tintypes,
doubtless and flattered himself that he
looked his best. When the sittings were
over, tne operator showed him a proof.
"There," said he. "I think this is a pr
Krewskin looked at it and finally said,
"It '11 do." When he got home, he showed
it to his wife and told her it was a picture
of the "Wild Man of Borneo" that was on
exhibition at the town hall.
"You can't fool me," said his wife, exam
ining the picture critically. "I've seen the
Wild Man of Borneo, and he's not half so
ugly and frightful looking as this."
"Well, old man," says one, "how's busi
ness?" "Splendid!" says number two. "I've just
got a commission from a millionaire. He
wants lys children painted very badly."
"Good! I congratulate you, my boy.
You're the very man for a job like that."
: One Form ofoilnd Reading.
Mind reading by those who divine, by
taking your hand, where you have hidden
anything is a reading of imperceptible mo
tions by which your thought is translated
without your being conscious of it. Pop
ular Science Monthly.
Profit and Fun For Householders.
The young married man, after being both-j
ercd for a long time by the agent of a well J
known sewing machine conitnny, decided !
to make a purchase. A machine was ac- ;
cordingly sent to the house, nnd he was to '
pay the lnl of $40 by installments.
Before the fir?t installment was paid the
azent who hud sold him the machine left
t he company and became nt tar lied to a
rival concern equally as well known as the
first. He called at the young benedict's
home and offered to sell him one of his new
machines for $5 less than lie was paying for
the one he then had.
The agent agreed to make all the neces
sary arrangements about returning the first
machine to company No. 1, and at last the
young couple decided to take the other ma
chine. The new machine arrived next day, and a
lease was made out with company No. 2.
That yery afternoon an agent from -company
No. 1 appeared and demanded to
know why their machine had been reject
ed. Matters were explained to him, and
after a consultation with the managers of
his compauy he returned aud offered to put
in the first machine at price S3 less than
what the young couple were paying for ma
chine No. 2. lie said he would rather do
this than have company No. 2 crow ovci
him and be able to say that they had sold a
machine where he couldn't.
His offer was accepted, and the first ma
chine was returned.
A few days later company No. 2 sent iu
agent to the house again and offered to let
the couple have its machine for even f3 less
than company No. l's latest offer, and as a
result he once more pliiced his machine in
When this intelligence reached the office
of company No. l, the manager himself
drove over to see the young people, and aft
er considerable talk offered, rather than
have machine No. 2 in the house, to give
the young couple a machine of their make
This offer was accepted, and the young
people were made to promise that they
would not reveal the price of the machine
to company No. 2.
The promise was readily jnven. Boston
A Noted Singer In Society.
Catalani. a gifted songstress and a lovely
woman, was the idol of society and the fa
Forite of fortune. But she had neither
knowledge or culture, and her ignorance
sometimes mail?ier stumble into ludicrous
mistakes. One of hey greatest triumphs in
London was the sinking of "God Save the
King." The town w.-nt laud over her ren
dering of the n:ition:.l ai;t!u-m. Twc hun
dred guineas were paid her for singing it
once. Uutt-lie ahvas sang it "God shave
At the court of Sane-Weimar she noticed
the marked attention tiuid to a gentleman
of majestic appearance.
"Who is t hat?" sb.; asked.
"That, madam, is the celebrated Goethe,"
was the reply.
"Goethe Goethe?"' asked the puzzled
singer, to whom music was the only pro
fession that brought celebrity. "On what
instrument does he play?"
"He is the renowned uuthor of the 'Sor
rows of Werthcr, madam."
"Oh, yes, 1 remember."
Then, abruptly addressing the great man,
she said with fascinating vivacity, "Ob.
sir, what an admirer I am of We.rt.LerI"
Goethe, always sensitive to woman's
praise, bowed profoundly.
"I never," she continued, "saw nnything
so laughable in my life. What a capital
farce it is!"
" 'The Sorrows of Werthcr' a farce, mad
am?" exclaimed the poet coldly, annoyed
that the most sentimental of his books
should lie thus spoken of.
"Oh, yes," added Catalani, laughing
loudly, "never was there anything so ridic
ulous." She was referr-n:; to a burlesque of the
story, which she had seen acted. Goethe
did not recove r himself for the whole even
ing. Youth's Companion.
What Ucadlng Really Means.
Though nolKii'.v has a right to prescrilie
the books for another to read, a direction
may be indicated which experience has
proved it is desirable to take That direc
tion may be briefly pointed out as the one
which contains the gems of our language.
There are many of them quite enough to
occupy the time which the average man is
able to devote to reading. When he has
read these, he will have a right to explore
the bypaths of literature, but only when he
has exhausted the first class should be be
gin to dabble in the second, third or teeth
rate. In fact, once this taste for the best
is cultivated any other than it will pall
upon the ear and ful to satisfy the mind.
The reader becomes intuitively aware when
a master spirit is talking to him, for he
feels that what he is reading bears an inti
mate relation to universal humanity as
well as to himself, aud therefore possesses
a vital interest for alL
This is a true test of whether a book is
merely parochial or belongs to the wide re
public of letters. No matter how exalted
or how humble the theme, if it appeals to
our common humanity it is literature in
the true sense. The "Compleat Angler,"
with its freshness and simplicity and over
flowing love of nature, and the "Natural
History of Selborne," wherein, says Car
lyle, "Parson White has copied a little sen
tence or two faithfully from the inspired
volume of nature," are as truly literature
as the sublimities of Milton's cathedral di
apason. Chambers' Journal.
Perils of Modern lifs.
Contacts with electric wires, railroad acci
dent, broken car and elevator cables, expiations
of steam, natural gat and chemicals, poisons In
adulterated food and drink are a few ; bat all
these dangers combined do sot kill as rapidly tt
slow and sure cinsumptlon. The death rate,
however, from consumption, is Toeing yearly cat
down since Dr. Fierce, of Buffalo. N, Y., has
given to the world his celebrated "Gelden Medi
ctl Discovery," a cnre for consumption and
throat and lung troubles tht lead to consump
tion, if taken in time and given a fair trial. The
tiae to cnre consumption (which Is really noth
ing more or less than lung scrofula), is in the
first stages A congh generally sounds the
alorrn, and yoa should take the "Discovery" at
once. ' There it a time when it it too late.
I was troubled with catarrh for
seven years previous to conimencinp;
the use of Ely's Cream Balm. It has
done for me what other so-called
cures have failed to do cured me
The effect of the Balm seemed magi
cal. Clarence L. Huff, Biddeford,
After trying many remedies for
catarrh during the past 12 years, I
tried Ely's Cream Balm with com
plete success. It is over one year
since I stopped using it, and have
had no return of catarrh. I recom
mend it to all my friends. Milton
T. Palm, Beading, Pa.
Castor ia is Dr. Samuel Pitcher's prescription for Infants
and Children. It contains neither Opium, Morphine nor
other Xarcotic suhstanco. It is n harmless suhstitnte
for Paregoric, Drops, Soothing Syrups and Castor OIL
It is Pleasant. Its guarantee is thirty years use by
Millions of Mothers. Castoria destroys AVorms and allays
feverishness. Castoria prevents vomiting' Sour Curd,
cures Diarrhoea and Wind Colic Castoria relieves
teething troubles, cures constipation and flatulency.
Castoria assimilates the food, regulates the stomach
and bowels, giving healthy and natural sleep. Cas
toria is the Children's Panacea the Mother's Friend.
Castoria la an excellent medicine for chil
dren. Mothers have repeatedly told me of its
good effect upon their children."
Da. O. C. Osgood,
Castoria Is the best remedy for children of
which I am acquainted. I hope the day is not
far distant when mothers will consider the real
interest of their children, and use Castoria in
stead of the various quack nostrums which are
destroying their loved ones, by forcing opium,
morphine, soothing syrup and other hurtful
agents down their throats, thereby x-nHin-.
them to premature graves."
Da. J. F. Km CBaXOB,
Th Centaur Company, 77
THE MOLINE WAGON,
ilanutactnrers ol FARM, SPRING AND FREIGHT WAGONS
A fnll and complete line of Platform and other Spring Wagons, especially adapted to tt
Vestera trade, ol superior workmanship and finish Illustrated Price List free on
avl'lication. Bee the HOL1KS WAGOil before purchasing
Hi ating and Ventilating Engineers,
Gas and Steam Fitting,
A complete line oi Fipe, Brass Goods, Packing Hose,
Fire Brick Etc. Largest nd best equipped
establishment west of Chicago.
DAVIS bixi;ji. Moline, HI.
Everything in the line . of spring vehicles, and the
largest assortment of
Harness, Lap robes, Whips, Etc.
Mason's Carriage Works,
East Fourth Street.
I ELY'S CREAM
Ira" I'nJn ua j anamination, Heals
tb 8om, Ketttoreii Tate and Smell, and I'vrcti
If A A t 7
mm m m
mm aV m mm
Oives belief Mt once for Cold la Mead.
Apply into the Koetril. -t it Ouirklp Abeorbtd.
50c bruggista or by mail. ELY BKOSi, 64 Warren St., ii. Y.
Carpenter and Builder,
OFFICE, NO: 2821 SIXTH AVENUE,
Shop on Vine Street BOCK ISLAND, ILL.
" Castoria is so well adapted to children that
I recommend it as superior toanypmsulptioj
known to me."
H. A. Abcbeb, 3C D..
Hi So. Oxford St., Brooklyn, K. T.
" Our physicians in the children's depart
ment have spoken highly of their experi
ence in their outside practice with Castoria,
and although we only have among our
medical supplies what is known as regular
products, yet we are free to confess that tka
merits of Castoria has won us to look wits
favor upon it."
Cmtxd Hospital and Dispkhsabt,
Aixbh C Smith, Pres.,
Murray Street, New York City.
1 12. 1 14 West Seventeenth st.
Telephone 1148. Bocklalans.
Teleohono 1 168
BALM - Clean Nutll