Newspaper Page Text
f ) COPY R 1 C. H T ED 1 6 9 3 T-gTr7 5"::iS5:::'
1 t -J- . ""S
r V sil 1 -iy
I Vf Gi lantHiCAH PfiFSS
!IK IS T(H HEALTHY.
I knew yon would ;pt into
sii'l the ivrery Tiinn r tho had
:, Miii't-:u:in i';:;i alon leading
... ;ir. tlic 1 y having am empty
..:,j!if 1m it tie in niie hand imd a
'..v.'. "What lias he been doitv-,
,.ii,viiuni':' iiski-d tho procory m.-n
j , !i -I'Mian halted with tlu loy in
.,; tin- "tore.
,;. I w;ts piiiv,' by ii honse tip here
l;id opened the door with a
of champagne, and he cut
valid tired the -;rk at another
, ,1 tli" eliaii'.piiL'iie went all over
,v walk, and some of it went o
I knew there was something
Yause chair.patrne is too expev
, wa:e that way. and he said he
Mining the shebang and if I would
nun lu re you would say he was all
I; you say so, I will let him go."
has como ov-ryonV ra: i see no nas
braced np at d looks pale and solemn.
ou haven't ( onverted him, have yon?"
in t nine iihiii Iritiliiuj him ;
the i n r.
i ;-v man said he had better let
. ;i- his parents would not like
ir 1 : TT lr - p't locked up. So the
go his ear. and he threw
Imltle lit a eoal wagon, and
pohei-iiiau had brushed the
oil his coat and snieiled of
!vl starteil on the irrocerv
firned to the boy, who was peeling
:h:!mt. and said:
f v. what kind of a rirens have you
biviiu. and what do yon mean by
sir -ving wme thit way, and where
i; r folks;"
11. I'll tell you. Ma she has got
y tVvi-r and has gone to Lake Sn
if she can't stop sneezing,
.i'urik'.v Pa 8aid he and me would
to ( Uimomowoc and stay over
.! and try and recuperate our
IV said it would lie a good joke
t:." tint To can liim Far but to net 83
i.k I v.-as hi.:, yor.nger brother, and
uiii haw a renl nice time. v
kmnved what lie wanted. lie is nn
..Mailer, that's what's the matter with
1 l:c was going to plify himself
! .viirior. ( )h. thunder. 1 got onto
i.ket in a minute. lie was iu
: vi'i to sonu'of the girls, and Sarnr-v.-:iing
he d;:r.c.'d till the cows come
. At honi'j he is awful 'fraid if
.ui.it V.. and he nr ver sweat or sitsin
hut the v.-r.t'T just poured off'n
;uai he :-tood i;i ihe do;;r mid let a
m him till I wr.s afraid he would
and just j-s he was telling a girl
J fllllfi'e v.-lvi w:in i(il.TTirr lnm
being a b:u-h, that ho was
I -'ire as lie could a! wars hold out a
ian hater if he vastobetlirown into
i' t with til" ::;:rn;ing ladies of the
any south I milled his coat and said:
. hi w do you s'pic Ma's hay fever is
-iif: I'll "iM't she is just sneezing the
f '' 1t head oii'.' Vj;11. sir, you just
iiten seen that girl and Pa. Pa looked
Si::' as .if I was a total utramrer and
the jiorter if that freckled faced
''lack Ik long 1 around the honse he
ii-tter be fired out. of the ballroom,
tai' mrl said tliedisgustin thing, and
Wore they iired me I told Pa he
I'f ttiT look out fr he would sweat
i'ii his liver pad.
, "u, io oeii, atni i'a staid up till tlie
f ..Vi v.-i'iit out. He was mad when he
t to hi d. buthe didn't lick mo 'cause
!" 'lil" in tho next room would hear
hut the next morninir be talked to
He said I might go back home Sun-i.i-'iit.
and he would stav a dav or
? H.' sat around on the veranda all
"fti riioon talking with the girls, and
ii lie would see me coming along he
f i I'l louk cross. Ho took a girl out
; riding, and when I asked him if I
f "li.'t go along he said he was afraid I
f '"Id get drowned, and he said if I went
r-J'' there was nothing thero too good
toe, and so my chum and me got to
f"n bottles of champagne, and he hit
HI the OVA TcHtti o rrrrlr nnil T flrrwft
' "lit. doors and was just going to
his earthworks when the police
a cellared me. Say, what's good for
Fhf gi ( K-ery man told him his Pa would
" it when ho got home. "What do
i think Vonr Pa's obieet. wm in nnss-
t'liilnself oflF for
mr.vi-oc," asked the grocery man as he
'ftvil up the cucumber to the boy's fa-
Tliat's what heats me. Oh, I suppos-
""-s it for his health, tho way they a
hen they go to a summer resort,' mt
i aves a boy an orphan, don't it, to
n Mich kitteny parents."
HIS I'A HAS GOT BELIGIOX.
'"11, that beats the devil," said the
'''r.V lllan ni Iip b too1 in front nf bis
FX.'l.'rv and unw 1 lrtl lii.Tr iintninir
. "V. .. WU .t.V JfJ V, ..... . ..f-f
np on tho wav homo from Sunday
ool with a clean shirt on and a Testa-
'---t and some dime novels nnder his
fl. "Wll.lt lma or-,1 n-hnt.
threw down l;er nymnbook and took off I
..vi uuuiitri. loiisnoiuu De patient, ite
member, Job v as patient, and he was af
flicted with soro boils.'
" 'I don't care.' says Pa as he chased
the ants out of bis drawers: 'Job never
had ants in his liver pad. If he had, he
would have swore the shingles off a barn.
Here, you,' says Pa, speaking to me, 'yon
head off them ants running under the
bureau. If the truth was known, I be
lieve yon would be responsible for this
outrage. And Pa looked at me kind of
" 'Oh, Pa,' says I, with tears in mv
eyes, "do yon think yonr little Sunday
school boy wonld catch ants in a iop
bbttle on the lake shore and bring them
home and put them in the hole of your
liver pad just before you put it on to go
to church? You are too bad.' And I
shed some tears. 1 can 6hed tears now
any time I want to, but it didn't do any
good this time. Pa knew it was me, and
while he was looking for the shawl strap
I went to Sunday school, and now I-guess
he is after me, and I will go and take a
walk down to Bay View."
The boy moved off as his Pa turned a
corner, and the grocery man said: "Well,
that boy beat all 1 ever saw. If he was
mine, I would give him away."
Tfi u iitxtn,n)i)ig on it with his boots."
"No, Pa hits not got religion enough to
hurt yet, hm, he has got the symptoms.
He has joined the church on prowbation
and is trying to be good so he can get in
the church for keeps. He said it was
hell living the way he did, and he has got
lue to promise to go to Sunday school.
He said if 1 didn't he wonld maul me so
my skin wouldn't hold water.
"Yon see, Ma said Pa had got to be on
trial for six months before he could get
in the church, and if he could get along
without sw mring and doing anything
bad he was all right, and we must try
him and se- if we could cause him to
swear. She said she thonght a person
when they was on a prowbation ought
to be a mar yr and try and overcome all
temptations to do evil, and if Pa could
go through six months of our home life
and not cus-i the hinges off the door he
was sure oi si glorious immortality be
yond the gr tve. She said it wouldn't be
wrong for l ie to continue to play inno
cent jokes on Pa. and if he took it all
right he was a Chistian. but if he got a
hot box acd flew around mad he was
better out t f church than in it. There he
comes now " said the boy as he got lie
hind a sign, "and he is pretty hot for a
Christian. He is looking for ine. Y'on
had ought to have seen him in church
"You see, I commenced theexercises at
home after breakfast by putting a piece
of ice in ea Ai of Pa's boots, and when he
pulled on the lioots be yelled that his feet
were all or fire, and we told him that it
was nothii g but symptoms of gout, so
he left the ice in his boots to melt, and
he said all the morning that he felt as
though he had sweat his boots full. But
that was l ot the worst. Yon know. Pa
he wears ti liver pad. Well, on Saturday
my chum and me was out on the lake
shore, and we found a nest of ants, these
little red ants, and I got a pop bottle
half full o " the ants and took them home.
I didn't know what. I would do with tlie
ants, but ints are always handy to have
in the he nse. This morning when Pa
was dressing for church I saw his liver
pad on a chair and noticed a hole in it.
and I thought what a good place it would
be for the ants.
"I don't know what possessed me, but
i tooK tne liver pad into" my room and
opened the bottle and put the hole over
the mouth of the bottle, and I guess the
ants thon ;ht there was something to eat
in the hirer pad, 'cause they all went
into it, aiid they crawled around in the
bran and condition powders inside of it,
and I took it back to Pa, and he put it
on under his shirt and dressed himself,
and we ent to church. Pa squirmed a
little wbm the minister was praying,
and I gut ss some of the ants had come
out to vi ;w the landscape o'er. When
we got t p to sing the hymn, Pa kept
kicking, as though he was nervous, and
he felt down his neck and looked sort of
wild, the way he did when he had the
jim jams. When we sat down, Pa couldn't
keep still, and I like to died when I saw
some of the ants come out of his shirt
bosom a id go racing around his white
vest. Pi tried to look pious and re
signed, but ho couldn't keep his legs
still, and ho sweat more'n a pailful.
"When tho minister preached about
'tho worm that never dieth,' Pa reached
into his vest and scratched his ribs, and
he looked as though he would give $10 if
the mini iter would get through. Ma she
looked at Pa as though she would bite
his head off, bnt Pa he just squirmed and
acted at though his soul was on fire.
Say, does ants bite or jnst crawl around?
Well, when the minister said amen and
prayed the second round and then said
a brother who was a missionary to the
heathen would like to make a few re
marks about the work of the missionaries
in Bengal and take rip a collection, Pa
told Ma they would have to excuse him,
and ho lit out for home, slapping himself
on the 1 ;gs and on tho arms and on the
back, and he acted crazy. Ma and m
went heme after the heathen got through
and found Pa in his bedroom with part
of his clothes off, and the liver pad waj
cn the floor, and Pa was stamping on it
with hi i boots and talking offul.
" 'What is the matter?' says Ma. 'Don't
your religion agree with you?
"Religion be dashed,' says Pa as he
kicked the liver pad. 'I would give $10
to know how a pint of red ants got into
my live r pad. Religion is one thing, and
a million ants walking all over a man
playing tag is another. I didn't know
the liv r pad was loaded. How in Go
henna did they get in there?' and Pa
scowled at Ma as though he would kill
"-.'Dcn't swear,dear,' says Ms. as she
HIS PA AT THE REUNION.
"I saw poor Pa wearing a red. white
and blue badge, and a round red badge,
and several other badges last week dur
ing the reunion," said the grocery man to
the bad boy as the youth asked for a
piece of codiish skin to settle coffee with.
"He looked like a hero with his old black
hat with a gold cord around it."
"Yes, he wore all the badges he could
get the first day, but after he blundered
into a place where there were a lot of
fellows from his own regiment he took
off the badges, and he wasn't very nu
merous around the boys the rest of the
week. But he was lightning on the
sham battle," says the boy.
naa stolen uis .-.i; i .. ;,s i'..' " ne.i
I told Pa that tlie suiuitr on t n horss
said he was a rebel, and he was going to
kill him. The sokii. r slar'atl after Pa
"Pa's verves got unstrung."
"What was the matter? Didn't the
old soldiers treat him well? Didn't they
seem to yearn for his society?" asked the
grocery man as the boy was making a
lunch on some sweet crackers in a tin
"Well, they were not verj- much
mashed on Pa. Y'on see. Pa never gets
tired telling us about bow he fit in the
army. For several years I didn't know
what a sutler was, and when Pa would
tell about taking a musket that a dead
soldier had dropped and going into the
thickest of tlie fight and fairly mowing
down the Confederates in swaths the way
they cut hay I thought he was tho great
est man that ever was. Until I was 11
years old I thought' Pa had killed men
enough to fill the Forest Home cemetery.
I thought a sutler was something higher
than a general, and Paused to talk about
'I and Grant,' and what Sheridan told
him, and how Sherman marched with
him to the sea, and all that kind of rot,
until I wondered why they didn't have
pictures of Pa on a white horse, with
epauiets on ana a sword. One day at
school I told a boy that my Pa killed
more men than Grant, and the boy said
he didn't doubt it, but he killed them
with commissary whisky.
"The boy said his Pa was in the same
regiment that my Pa was sutler of, and
his Pa said my Pa charged him $3 for a
canteen of peppersance and alcohol and
called it whisky. Then I began to in
quire into it and found cmt that a sutler
was a sort of liquid peanut stand, and
that his rank in the army was about
the same as a chestnut roaster on the
sidewalk here at home. It mado me
sick, and I never had the same respect
for Pa after that. But Pa don't care.
He thinks he is a hero and tried to get a
Insion on account of losing a piece of
his thumb, but when the officers found
he was wounded by the explosion of a
can of baked beans they couldn't give
it to him. Pa was down town when tho
veterans were here, and I was with him,
and I saw a lit of old soldiers looking at
I'a, and I told him they acted as though
they knew him, and he put on his glasses
and said to ono of them, 'How are you.
Bill?' The soldier looked at Pa and
called the other soldiers, and one said,
'That's the old duffer that sold me the
bottle of brandy peaches at Chickamanga
for $3, and they eat a hole through my
"Another said: 'He's the cuss that took
$10 out of my pay for pickles that were
put up in aqua fortis. Look at the corps
badges he has on.' Another said: 'The
old whelp! He charged me 50 cents a
pound for onions when I had the scurvy
at Atlanta.' Another said: 'He beat me
out of my wages playing draw poker
with a cold deck and the aces np his
sleeve. Let ns hang him.' By this time
Pa's nerves got unstrung and began to
hurt him, and he said he wanted to go
home, and when we got around the cor
ner he tore off his badges and threw them
in the sewer and said it was all a man's
life was worth to be a veteran nowadays.
He didn't go down town again till next
day, and when he heard a band playing
he would go around the block. But at
the sham battle, where there were
no veterans hardly, he was all right
with tho militia boys, and I told them
how he did when ho was in the army.
I thought it would 4bo fun to see Pa
run, and so when one of the cavalry
fellows lost his cap in the charge and
was looking for it I told the dragoon
that ths missy old man over brJ,he fejw-e
with his saber fir;:
ud Pa started to
run, and it was fnuny, you bet. The sol
dier galloped his horse and yelled, and
Pa put in his best licks and "run up the
track to where there was a board off the
fence and tried to get through, but begot
stuck, and the soldier put the point of
his saber on Pa's pants and pushed, and
Pa got through the fence, and I guess he
ran all the way home.
"At supper time Pa wonld not coihe
to the table, but stood up and ate off the
sideboard, and Ma said Pa's shirt was all
bloody, and Pa said nure'ii 50 of them
cavalrymen charged on him, and he held
them at bay as long as he could and
then retired in good order. This morn
ing a boy told him that I set the cavalry
man onto him, and he made mo wear
two mousetraps on my ears all the
forenoon, and he says he will kill me at
6iinset. I ain't going to be there at sun
set and don't you remember about it.
Well, goodby . I have got to go down to
the morgue and see them bring in the
man that was found on the lake shore,
and see if the morgue keeper is drunk
To be Continued.
Sept. 15 Estate of Howard Wells.
Petition of Rosalia S. Wells for let
ters of administration filed. Bond
filed and approved and letters issued
to her. Charles L. Walker, II. D.
Mack and M. A. Patterson appointed
Estate of James Waugh. Widow's
relinquishment, and selection filed
and approved and order turning; over
property selected to widow.
Guardianship of Florence May
Goodenow. Petition for letters of
guardianship filed. Bond filled and
approved and letters issued to Ellen
Are most rglcemed by every intelligent man and
woman. Derangemezla of the liver, stomach and
bowels speedily present to us the living question
of obtaining relief. It is at once found in Dr.
Pierce's Pleasant Pellets, wLich cure sick head
ache, constipation, indigestion, bil:oas attacks,
etc. Purely vegetable and perfectly harmless,
they arc nncunalcd as a specific for the com
plaints named. One tiny, sugar-coated Pellet a
do?o. In vials, 45 cents. Carry them in your
Makes life miserable. All other
niinic'jits are as nothing in cora-
:ir:soi. Women especially know
its suffering, ami few escape its
THE RELIEF AND CURE IS
Many people take pills, which
gripe and purge, weakening the
Wly. More take Simmons Liver
Ilogulator, liquid or powder, be
cause more pleasant to take, does
not grino, and is a mild laxative,
that also tones up the system.
The relief is quick. It is Nature's
own remedy, purely vegetable.
"I never found anything to do me any
pood until 1 used Simmons Liver Regula
tor. Jt lias been three years since 1 first
used it aud I have not hud Sick Headache
Kincc. 1 sent my sister (who had from one
to two attacks of Hick Ueadaebe every
week) one-hall of a package, and she has
not had it since." C. S. AlOKKiS, Browus
Baw our Z Stamp In red on wrapper.
J. H. ZETL1N & CO.. Philadelphia. Pa.
OOO ..O..O..O..O..O..O..O..O.. ooo
5 Hair Death:
instantly removes and forever destroys ob -jecltonulile
h r. whether upon the hands,
face, arin or necK, without discoloration
or injury to tlie most delicate skin. It was
POIt FIFTY TKARS TH R 8 SI HET TO R I'l.l OP
Ktia-nrs Wilson, acknowledged hy phyi
cions as the highest authority and the
most eminent donnu'oloe;ist aud hairspe-iu-lietthal
ever lived. Dunns hl private prac
tice of a life-tun i among toe nohlity and ar
istocracy of Europe he prescribed this re
cipe. 1"b ce. SI by mall, securely picked,
eorresoiuidencfl conflrtcutiHl. 8oTe Agents
for America. Address TUB SKOOKl'M
HOOT 1IAIK IKOK"ECO. Dept. H., ST
South 3th avenue, New York.
ooo '()')' o ' ' o ' ' o ' " o ' ' o ' " o ' ' ooo
WHEN YOU VISIT
THE WORLD'S FAIR
Do not lorget to see the ex
hibit of the General Elec
tric Company in the Elec
tricity Building, U e Intra
mural Railway equipped
with General Electric Com
pany's apparatus, the Elec
tric Launch e a equipped
with General Electric Com
pany's motors, and the Gen
eral Electric company's Arc
Lighting Plant and Power
, Generators in Machinery
I V I
Castoria is Dr. Samuel Pitcher's prescription for Infants
and Children. It contains neither Opium, Morphine nor
other Narcotic substance It is a harmless substitute
for Paregoric, Drops, Soothing Syrups, and Castor Oil.
It is Pleasant. Its guarantee is thirty years' use by
Millions of Mothers. Castoria destroys "Worms and allays
feverishness. Castoria prevents vomiting Sour Curd,
cures Diarrhoea and Wind Colic. Castoria relieves
teething troubles, cures constipation and flatulency.
Castoria assimilates tho food, regulates the stomach,
and bowels, giving healthy and natural sleep. Cas
toria is the Children's Panacea the Mother's Friend.
"Castoria is an excellent medicine for chil
dren. Mothers have repeatedly told me of its
good effect upon their children."
Dr. G. C Osgood,
" Castoria is the best remedy for children of
which I am acquainted. I hope the day is not
far distant when mothers will consider the real
interest of their children, and use Castoria in
stead of the various quack nostrums which are
destroying their loved ones, by forcing opium,
morphine, soothing syrup and other hurtful
agenta down their throats, thereby sending
hem to premature graves."
Da, J. F. Eihcbklob,
" Castoria is so well adapted to children that
I recommend it as superior to any preecripttaa
known to me."
H. A. Archkr, H.
lit So. Oxford St., Brooklyn, N. T.
" Our physicians in the children's depart
ment have spoken highly of their experi
ence in their outside practice with Castoria,
and although we only have among our
medical supplies what is known as regular
products, yet we are free to confess that that
merits of Castoria has won us to look with
favor upon it."
Uhotd Hospital akd Dispkithakt,
Alum C Smith, iYes.,
Thai Centarar Company, TI Murr ay Street, New York City.
THE MOLINE WAGON,
The Moline Wagon Co.
Manufacturers ol FARM, SPRING AND FREIGHT WAGONS
A full and complete line ot Platform and other Spring Wagons, especially adapted to to
Western trade, of superior workmanshlo and finish Illustrated Price List free on
application. Seethe MOLINE WAGON before oarchasing
Heating and Ventilating Engineers,
Gas and Steam Fitting,
A complete line ot ripe. Brass Goods, Packing Hose,
Fire Brick Etc. Largest &nd best equipped
establishment west of Chicago.
DAVIS tiUJijXL Moline, 111.
1 12. 1 14 West Seventeenth et.
Telephone 1148. ;Eocklslan
Residence TeleDhone 1 1 69'
Everything in the line of spring vehicles, and" the
largest assortment of
Harness, Laprobes, Whips, Etc.
Mason's Carriage Works,
East Fourth Street. - - DAVENPORT, 10 Wa.
B. F. DeGEAR,
Contractor and Builder.
Oflicc and Shop 225 Eighteenth Street
ROCK ISLAND, ILL.
"AU kinds of Carpenter work a specialty. Plans and eetimstesjfor all kinds of bondings
Carpenter and Builder,
OFFICE, NO: 2821 SIXTH AVENUE,
Shop on Vine Street BOCKISL AND, ILL.