Newspaper Page Text
to til's (bailor who is bent
on liijiRor prolits. The
thing that he wants you to
buy, wh'-n you iisk for Dr.
Tierce's Favorite Prescrip
tion, isn't "just as gorKL"
IVrxif of this is easy. The
only (inttrantred remedy
for 'the nilineitts of wnmnn-
Inv.il is tlio " Favorite l're
st'i . prion." If it ever fails
to bcni-iit or cure, in mak
ing r.-cak women strong
or s'i.":Vring women well,
von have your money
ir-' f.-! "coulil H,u' """''I bo, solll in
j'ti:- 'u.i::intii"t nieilii-ine Is an invignra
, r, t . .i-ri: tvir t' esjieciiilly ailaptetl to
' ;n,..; . ii,- Ms nml I - rfivtiy harmless in any
F r i
; ii-. ;
U up, stri'iuuii'tis, regulates, ana
1 pi! l-'::riiiK-lown sensa-
. 1. : '.ii!.-.' .inn everything
a icniti!? complaint." it's a
;ti', cvrtaiu, nml proved.
m II i'
iKt-LIABLE 'AND ONI Of THE
bet knows specialists
'S THE UNITED STATES.
!; .mills Crowilfil. Kvcrylioil y
-atilicil. and Many
l'ruiiiiir II i 111 .
DR. D. D. REA,
Suron 'i.id Specia'ist
W ... ; ..I i -r .t.'! en It 'i.u?tou in and nroiml
i r, i :v c i nt fz ll-fa-c- that almost h tiled
... il t r.iU'nii'y of the c uiitry, and by thu
r ; : t f rmny frU'iitU umt pativutt be has tie
At the Harper House,
FRIDAY, SEPT. 29th.
I; ;;:ii!n' every month during the
vear. t.i remain a dav.
1 1; a li t- U'.-n lini'ctcil with tiie hirers
' i i'; Mi - country, ami tins no superior in
.I::. - t.j ;e il iriMtin oiseises snl dcfnm;i
4 lit wil! i'ivi- :jo fur any case he cannot tell
i" !'.' ii'. :iii:! where Incut e 1 in live minute.
''.... ro'urn in Kork lrland every month to re-
. T. - .1:1 v
'1 .1- .ii i -ir ilile medical tiiul siirjical dis.
- .i .i'l- nml r lirnnic catarrh, i iMeanes of the
i 1 il" :l':'l ll'ISe. th oat an 1 lurff-. it) spepeiil,
r:j. ' iii-i':ic. iIiviitMeii. kiilneye. liver, blait
r f'M f-male nml nexunl utfi'.ari'"i. Eiiilep
V 1 uri'il I A po'itive guarantee!
nuiiz unit .iitaltlle-Asrd Sien
.t! r . fiom spi'miatorrhoea and impotoncy as
-;:! nt i.'if alme in youth or t'i ei in ina
: v- ir. :ii:il otner caiiiies. produciiii; nonic of
f.i ,...i-;l- i.-fi,'.:t, etniHaionii, lilotehei.. de
.:f . r'viHi-i,.--.., ilizzine?, confusion of itlean.
r-of "ncu ty. (U fecttvc niemorv ami texoal
ii:. . t mi, whifii unit the victima for buineiH
Ti.iT.i, are permanently cured by remedies
Itlnort nml Hktn itlKeaMeft.
ytir..ih- ami cimnlications, a norc throat.
J "i tin-tinr. pain In the bone, etc., are
t :v eradicated withont nuini; mercury or
t !-:'iirinn drills (ionorrhoea. (,'leet, utric
- ai.,1 all urinary and kidney troubles speedi
ng ny tn-atment that has never failed. Ho
It tke no n. curable cafes, hut cures thous-:-s
.en nt, tn die. Ifemembcr the date and
ic i.-arlv. as his room are always crowded
er' v-jr ti st jjH.
t'U nsL'LTATIoN FKEE.
rr' ;i.iii.K nre ilici'ed and contulentlal.
r ii-. i). D. jjea, ! Paulina Street
and how to attain it.
1 1 i w :t t n- tePs t ie caue s,
r elle t, points the remedy. This
"I.' iliv thp mom valuable, artistically
; '' uuifiil inc.lical book that has np
' . .' f . ''"i 'Jl WZ every pig. bearing
n!'i-tr.i!ion in tints. Home of the
''; r' "' -f-' Nervous Pehility, Impo--'J.Menlity,
g.' J.'1"'"11 Thus- mtemliiiB Marriajre.ctc.
"- a. i:: win would know the grAnd truths,
; fi t-, the old secrets, and the new
ir ! 'm f mi'lk'al c'cnea as applied to
' '1 1 !, lio w aild atone fjrpast follies
'' ,; i f ""fi'tiitralls should write for this
1 itt:e b.,ok. It will be sent free,
' '1. Address the publishers.
Erie Medical Co., Buffalo, N. T.
la the Lest remedy for
all complaints peculiar
I ' MSS(-J.
I Tl 1 1
THE LIMEKILN CLUB.
PROFESSOR MOSES SCOTT MAKES A
. FEW PREDICTIONS.
H Consider do Fncher of de Cull'd Man.
Says the I'roblem of Perpetual Motion
Will Bo Discovered by the Colored Man.
Oreat Things Ahead.
rCopj-ricbt, 1803, by Charles a Lewis.
When the routine business at the last
meetinp; of :he Limekiln club had been
concluded, Brother Gardner announced
that Professor Moses Scott of South Caro
lina, the inv -ntor of the two handled plan
tation hoe, vas in the anteroom and would
deliver a bri.-f address before the club. All
the lamps were turned tip a notch or two,
and Wnydown Beebe and Sir Isaac "Walpole
slipped out nnd brouKht the distinguished
visitor in. He was a two story man of
somewhat j.ncient appearance, but he cre
ated a favoi able impression by his calm de
meanor as 1 e mounted tho platform to be
k'My fren ., do smbjeck of my address am
entitled 'De Fucher of de Cull'd Man.'
Some of yo' know what do word "fucher'
means, an i onie of yo don"t. Fur de ben
efit of do h.tter I will explain dat it means
tomorrer, iiext week, next y'ar. Do past
am what has tookeu place an slid away
from us. De fucher am de joys and sor
rows in store for us. I hev a few predick
shuns to make. I invented 'cm mysell.
While I lv not de faintest suspishun dat
any nu-mbcr of di? club wold be onery
'null to steal any of desc predickshuns fur
his own, it may be jist as well fur me to
announce le fact dat dis address am pat
ented fron. top to bottom an am dangerous
fur any outsider to fool wid.
"I predii kt dut de problem of perpetual
moshun v ill bo nolved by a cull'd man
w'din de next 50 y'ars. Cheers. De white
man has monkeyed wid it till he am clean
tired, nn it has bin left fur us to grapple wid.
Some day, when de black man feels jist
rif:ht an u lin't got nothin to worry 'bout,
he'll spit c n his hands, frow down his ole
hat an put dem w heels together an start
de machire to runnin. Yells. He won't
think he 1 as done anything very smart, but
a hull wo Id w ill ri'z an hail him as de big
gest man in it. Thundering applause,
during w lien some plaster fell from the
'I predi .'kt de solut ion in de next quarter
of a century of de problem of de flyin man.
Whoops. V'ars of time an millyonsof
nioncyjiev bin devoted to dis matter by de
white ma i, but he am jist wlmr he started
iruui sii i waiklu around in de snow, dust
"A ELAt K MAX WILL STAXP OX DE TOP OF
DAT Sor.F l'OI.E."
an mm'.. No cull'd man has wasted two
cents' .-orf of time ou de problem, but
Homo eveuiu arter supper, when de chill'en
hev go io to bed au de ole woman am
finishin up the ironiu in de kitchen, some
man ol our race will git out de wings,
springs cogwheels an odder truck, put
'em together shipshape and take a leetle
joumej of 30 miles an back befo' de ole
woman has got down to de last towel. He'll
go to bed wishin he was able to hev codfish
fur bre ikfast, an he'll wake up able to hev
fried oysters ebery meal doorin de rest of
his lift. More thundering applause and
"If w e had a bridge across de Atlantic
ocean "-o London or Liberpool, we could
hitch e ole mewl to de cart, load de fam'
ly in au drive obcr dar an see how de folks
was comin on an if de price of taters was
up or t own. De white man can't build dat
bridge He's figgered an planned an lost
a heap o' sleep ober it, but it's no go. I
predickt dat widin the next hundred y'ars
some cull'd man will grasp de situashun
just at easy as frovvin a plank across a
mud puddle, and de nashuns of de world
will pat him on de back and speak of him
as a se. :ond Columbus. Cheers and whoops
which brought live policemen into the al
ley. "I predickt dat de fust man to reach de
norf J ole will be of our color. Up to de
present time none of us hev cared u copper
'bout norf poles or east poles or any odder
sort ol poles. We's bin hij in back to gin
de white man a show. He can't fetch it.
It nu y not be ober a y'ar hence when a
black man will stand on de top of dat norf
pole an wave de starry banner in de balmy
breeze an cry 'Vureky!' which means, 'I'ze
cotchinl it.' Cheers which sagged the
stovepipe six inches und put out the lamps.
"Dt white man has bin troubled 'bout
do nit on furtle last fo hundred y'ars. He
hain't, any better oft today dan when he
begun squintin nnd Cggerin. Dar may be
a nas mn of people up dar, wid persim
mons growin on ebery tree an watermill
yons -astin de y'nr round, or it may be nut
On hi t a sort of annex fur de overplus of
angel -t to fly around in. We's bin waitin
fur dn white man to gin us a p'inter, but
he h is frowed up his hands an quit de
job. Who kin solve dat mystery? He may
he m:b.t in djs room. If not he's sartinly
A MEDICAL BOOK worth
POM A.K8, sent for 10 cents in
Seaie I Envelope.
$1 Per Bottle at Drugfrists.
50c. Trial Size sent by mail.
tetters for advice Marked
"Cm suiting Department" are
seen by oar physicians only.
DA PHOHA HSOICWE CO
THE AlU'iUS, MOXDAT, SEPTEMBER 18, 18U3. ' a
among de three miliyon cuit a men In uls J
kentry. De day will come when we'll ;
Know jist as much 'lioutde moon as we do
'bout New Jersey, an we'll owe it all to a
black man. Such thunders of applause
that Brother Gardner had to step down and
mop the floor with Giveadam Jones to
check it and save the only piece of phister
left on the ceiling.
My frens," continued the orator when
his voice could again be beard, "my ad
dress contains 64 predickshuns, an i here
Rive yo' only five. I do not wish to oc
cupy yo'r waluabletime. Arter dis meet
in has busted up yo' will find me in de
anteroom. My book, containin de full 64
predickshuns, along wid rules to tell a
mewl's aige and 16 remedies fur carbuncles
and chilblains, will be on sale at 30 cents
a copy. Also a sample of my plantashun
two handled hoe, which kin be ordered at
ix bits apiece. When yo' git tired of usin
one handle, yo' kin turn to ile odder. Ke
turnin my heartfelt thanks fur yo'r kind
recepshun, I bid yo good night."
HE CHANGED HIS MIND.
Ho Could Stand Vp ami I'nsh All Day If
lie Wanted To.
There was a shriveled up, white headed
old colored man leaning up against the pas
senger depot nt Birmingham, Ala., when
the negro porter thought it would be a
good opportunity to show off hisauthority.
Therefore, walking up to him with a lordly
stride, he demanded:
"Ole man, does yo' know yo' am liable to
be sent to jail fur dat?"
"Shoo! What I done?"
"What yo' done? Yo' dun gone pushed
on dat d-.-po, salil What yo' doin 'bout
"I'ze dun waitin."
"Waitin fur what?"
"Fur my darter, who's gone up to de
stoh to trade."
"Who giu yo' leave to wait around yeref
Now, sab, yo' skate right up dat street, an
be mighty ld 1 doan' send yo' to jail!"
"yo' skate kigiit rr dat stueet."
"Yes, sah, but my darter she dun git fo'
hundred doilars, yo' see, an she cum to
"What! Yo'r darter git fo' hundred dol
lars?" "Yes, sah, and she's a widder, an she dun
got fo'ty acres of land au two mewls an a
"What! Yo'r darter got all dat?"
"Yes, sah, an mo' too."
"An she's a widder?"
"Yes, sah. Her man dun died las' y'ar.
She fust got six hundred dollars an now
she got fo' hundred mo', an she come to
"What! She duu got a thousand dol
lar!" "Y'es, sah."
"Au how ole is she?"
" 'Bout 30. I'ze sorry dat I dun pushed
agin de depo'. but yo' see I"
"Doan' menshun it, uncle! When dat
gal o' yo'rs cums back I'd like to spoke wid
"Yes, sah. I.e dun sorry 'bout pushin
on de depo, but yo' see"
"Dat's all right, uncle all right; yo' kin
stand right up dar' an push all day. When
I first seed yo", I felt it was my dooty to pre
arabulate de calamity, but now dat I come
tosagaciate de foresight I observe my mis
take. A thousand dollars, fo'ty acres of
land, two mewls, a wagin an a widder!
Here, ole man, I'll be right yere when dat
widder cums back, an in de meantime if
dat depo' am pushed in an kills 20 jieople I'ze
gwine to sw'ar yo' didn't hev nuflin to do
wid percolatin de catastrophe."
THE ARIZONA KICKER.
The Private Graveyard Is Visited by a
Fiend In Human Shape.
Horkible Outrage! We haven't been
saying much about our private graveyard
of late, as we discovered that any reference
to it created a feeling of envy among the
newspaper men of adjacent states and ter
ritories. It has been and will continue to
be, however, one of the romantic and pic
turesque spots in this locality. The in
closure is surrounded by a neat picket
fence painted white. The walks are grav
eled, nnd the 10 grass grown graves, espe
cially ou a moonlight night, have a soft,
tender look, which brings a feeling of rest
and peace to the beholder. Last Wednes
day we were visited by a Chioago editor,
who was driven out to the hallowed spot
and pronounced it the neatest thing of the
kind he ever saw. He also bitterly lament
ed the fact that Chicago journalism had
not yet reached that point where an editor
could inclose hjs little plot of ground and
FOR AX IIOTTI! WE HELD .PLEASANT CONVERSE.
Degin setting -np vorno.TTjnes. -as tne
bright, untarnished sun of Arizona slowly
traveled into the west he sat down upon
the grave of New Mexico Bill, and we sat
opposite on the grave of Utah Jack, and
for au hour we held pleasant converse on
the subject .of the decay of journalism in
the weak kne d east. We can't recall an
other hour in the last.three years when our
soul felt so fully sandpapered down and
oiled up for a new struggle with the cold,
When we left the p. g. an hour before
sunset, everything was all right, and our
visitor was wearing a flower plucked from
the mound, which marks the last resting
pi.u.d Ol M.Civ.ll j,, i om- wim
seconds too lam on the draw the day he laid I
, uu, posiomce. Thursday after
noon our eminent fellow townsman. Jim
Wheeler, who is a good hand with a club,
but no shooter. edict at Thk Kickei: office
to inform us that sune human h vena had
been at work out there. We i!.llcd our
cayuse and galloped out to the sacred spot
to find the information correct. Some fiend
in human form bad uprooted five or six of
the headboards, torn np many vines and
flowers and kicked at least 40 pickets off
the fence. If wu had not carefully prepared
and laid away a diagram of t lie inclosure.the
mixing np of tlie headlKiards would have
been lit tie less than acalamity. Wecouldnot
have told the difference between the graves
of "Colorado Hank" and "Gila John," and
in trying to restore them we might have
put I tie board belonging Vo the "Wyoming
Terror" at the head of the grave in which
sleeps the "California Cyclone."
There is only one critter in this locality
mean enough to turn his hand to such a
dastardly piece of business. We felt sure
of our man even before we found the im
prints of his old shots in the sand. There
wasn't the slightest doubt iu our mind that
the guilty wretch was that lop shouldered,
slab sided, knockkneed son of a gun whom
we are occasionally forced to allude to
as our "esteemed contemporary." In
deed we recollected of seeing him skulking
about as we sat talking, but supposed he
was simply aching for an introduction to
the Chicago man. We r.t once returned to
towti nnd got our guns and starred, for the
office of our contemporary. W'e were fully
determined, to kilj hira and ship his hotly
to some point at least 1,000 miles away at
our own expense. We entered his cooper
shop to find hii cross eyejj assistant editor
and his half starved and woebegone com
positor, but the wretch himself had fled
jialf an hour before, leaving word that busi
ness had called him to Tombstone. We
took a gallop of three miles in that direc
tion, but he had the cover of the brush and
For the post two years The Kicker has
vigorously advocated the admission of this
territory as a state. It will say no more on
that subject until this skulking coyote can
no longer claim to be a citizen. We have
argued that the wave of civilization was
breaking on our shores, but in the face of
such evidence as this we can argue no
more. When an editor has given five of
the best years of his life to the building up
of his town, and when he has cheerfully
shed his blood to otablish an institution
which every citizen may -point to with
pride, that man has a right to expect pro
tection and encouragement. At an indig
nation meeting held in The Kickei: office
yesterday it was resolved to lynch our es
teemed if he ever returned, and 14 new sub
scribers were added to our lar.'e and grow
ing list. In case of his demise and the con
sequent suspension of his disbrag sheet we
shall make no advance w hatever in adver
tising rates, and the subscription price will
positively remain nt present figures.
A "Sorter" Marriage.
Owing to an accident to the north lxuind
train we had to sidetrack for two hours at
a little Alabama hamlet. In one of the
coaches was a woman with seven children,
the oldest being about 1:1 and the youngest
not over a year old. A man who had been
sleeping on the depot platform finally woke
up, and after lookingat t he widow through
the open window for 10 or 15 minutes be
stood up and inquired:
"G wine down the kentry, ma'am?"
"Yaas, gwine down to Saundi rsville."
"Yo'r ole man went down ahead, I reck
on." "He couldn't, kaso Le dun died a y'ar
"Oh. I reel Sorter a widder, eh?"
"Yaas. sorter." she sighed after spanking
"A right smart of a flock vo' hev tliar "
"Sorter moarniu fur their father, some cf
'em. 1 reckon?"
"Yaas, niuaniiii mo' nor less, pore
"Au it's powerful lonesome fur vo', I take
"Yaas, sorter powerful, but I've ;;t to
b'ar up under it," hlie feelingly replied.
"Widder, could yo" come out yere fur a
bit?" asked the inuii as be shifted around
"I reckon I might, if it will obleege."
Three of us took charge of the children
while she went out. a-id walked up and
down with tiie man. Iu 10 minutes he
started off, aud she returned to the car to
"I thank yo' all fur yo'r kindness to a
widder which won't be a widder much
longer. Him's gone fur a preacher."
"Him" returned with the preacher in the
course of 20 minutes, aud everybody left
the train to witness the marriage ceremony,
which took place in the freightbouse. The
entire flock of eight children set up a howl
ing as their mot her stood up to lie "joined,"
and she delayed the ceremony five minutes
to distribute a supply of shakes and cuffs
among them. After SO or 40 of us Lad
kissed the bride and chipped in $20 iu cash
as a present I queried of the happy groom:
"C'a-se of love ut first sight, I suppose?"
"Sorter love und sorter children," he re
plied. "Have you any?"
"Hev 1? Thar' they be over thar', and if
to' all don't mind yo' kin stand t!i-.- hull
lot in a row und seo how fur luey will
We got both fiocks in line- a!l excepting
the baity ;.nd there were I'J i f them.
They were s'aniiiirr there ius tue iuulr.ea r
cried "All aboard'" M. Ql At).
A Ctano to Hake $500 or Better.
A o!im chance, you fancy. Well, rad ai d
judge for 50urelf. You have catarrh . J:00 is
offered for an Incurable ca?e of catarrh, in the
head, by the proprietors of Dr. Sage's Catarrh
Symptoms of Catarrh Headache, obstruction
of the nose, discharges falling into the throat,
sometimes profuse, watery ai.d acrid, at others,
thicK, tenacious, mucous, purulent, bloody,
putrid and offensive; eyt'8 weak, ringin; in the
ears, deafness; offensive breath; tmell and taste
Impaired, and general debility. Only a few of
these symptoms are Pkuly to be present at once.
Dr. Sage's Remedy cures the worst caees. Only
BOcenta. Sold by druggists everywhere. $.100 or
a cure. Either wou'd be acceptable.
OOO . . O . . O . . . . O . . O . . O . . O . . O . . OOO
Instantly removes and forever destroys ob-
. jecilonable ha r, whether upon the hanrtg,
lace, anus or neck, without decoloration
C or injury to the most delicate skin. It was s
; Foil T1PTT TIABS TUB 8KCI1KT FORMULA OF '.
O KsA'Mrs Wilson, acknowledged by pbyi- o
; cions as the highest authority and tho "
q most eminent dermatologist and hairrpe:iu- q
list that ever lived. Durinir hi urivate erac-
ticeof a life time among the noblity andar- '
. istocracy of Burope he prescribed this re- P
- cipe. ha ce, SI by rrail. wcurcly packed.
Correspondence confli'cutial. Sofe Ayents
I for America. Address THE SKOOKL'H '.
O KOOTHAIKGKOWKaCO. Dept. R., 5? O
g South 5th avenue. Sew York. g
oo o"o r-o'"o"o"0"o-' ooo
, ?i "
Castoria is Dr. Samuel Pitcher's prescription for Infants
and Children. It contains neither Opium, Morphine nor
other Xarcotic substanco. It is a harmless substitute
for Paregoric, Drops, Soothing Syrups, and Castor Oil.
It is Pleasant. Its gnaraatco is thirty years use by
Millions of Mothers. Cast or ia destroys Worms and allays
feverishncss. Castoria prevents vomiting1 Sour Curd,
cures Diarrhoea and Wind Colic. Castoria relieves
teething troubles, cures constipation aud flatulency.
Castoria assimilates the food, regulates the stomach
and bowels, giving healthy and natural sleep. Cas
toria Is tho Children's Pa.nacca the Mother's Friend,
" Castoria is an excellent medicinsj for chil
dren. Mothers have repeatedly told me of its
good effect upon their children."
Da. Q. C Osgood,
" Castcrla is the best remedy for children of
which I am acquainted. I hope the day is not
far distant when mothers will consider the real
interest of their children, and use Castoria in
stead of the various quack nostrums which are
destroying their loved ones, by forcing opium,
morphine, soothing syrup and other hurtful
agents down their throats, thereby sending
them to premature graves."
Da. J. F. Kixchkloc,
The Centaur Company, 77
THE MOLINE WAGON,
Manufacturers ol FARM. SPRING AND FREIGHT WAGONS
A full and complete line of Platform and other Spring W aeons, especially adapted to th
Western trade, of superior workmanship acd finish Illustrated Price List free on
application. See the MOLINE WAOON before ourchasing
Heating and Ventilating Engineers,
Gas and Steam Fitting;
A complete line oT ripe, Brass Goods, Packing Hose,
Fire Brick Etc. Largest And best equipped
establishment west of Chicago.
DA Via BL.UUJS. Moline, HI.
Everything in the line of epriDg vehicles, and, the
largest assortment of
Harness, Laprobes, Whips, Etc.
Mason's Carriage Works,
East Fourth Street. - - DAVENPORT, IOWA.
B. F. DeGEAR,
Contractor and Builder,
Office and Shop 225 Eighteenth Street
ROCK ISLAND, ILL.
e7"AU kinds of Carpenter work a specialty. Plans and estimateslfor all kinds of buildincs
furnished on application. . ,
Carpenter and Builder,
OFFICE, NO: 2821 SIXTII AVENUE,
Shop on Vine Street BOCKISLAND, ILL.
J I 1
" Castoria Is so well adapted to children thai
I recommend it as superior to any prescription
known to me."
H. A. Archer, M. D.,
Hi So. Oxford St., Brooklyn, N. T.
' Our physicians in the children's depart
ment have spoken highly of their experi
ence in their outside practice with Castoria,
and although we only have among our
medical supplies what is known as regular
products, yet we are free to confess that tba
merits of Castoria has won us to took with
favor upon it."
Usmm Hospital axd Dispessabt,
Allxh C Smith, Pret.,
Murray Street, New York City.
1 12. 1 14 West Seventeenth st.
Telephone 1148. IRockislani
Teleohone 1 1 69'