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A SLIM CIANCE.-"Don't you
believe that marriages are made in
Heaven," asked Mr. Yeast of Miss
Prim the other day.
"I most certainly do," replied
the lady of uncertain age, bright
ening up iat the Very suggestion of
a proposal, and throwing her head
on one side in her endeavor to look
coquettish;I "but why do you ask
''well, I thought you did,'' was
the young man's satisfied reply.
''But why did you think I did?'
persisted the antiquated maiden,
almost swallowing her overskirt in
her attempts to appear captivating.
'Well,' responded the heartless
young man, lighting a cigarette,
and getting at a respectable dis
tance from his antagonist: 'it does
not look as though there was much
chance of your being married be
fore you reached there!'
ON Ti LOOKOUT.-A young
man was standing on Chester street
smoking a cigarette and blowing
the smoke proudly from his nose
when a gentleman stopped and said
'Will you be kind enough to fa
vor me with your name and ad
( ress ?'
'And why should I give you my
name and address? You are a
stranger to me,' replied the young
man, lighting a fresh cigarette.
'You will please padon the re
quest,' contiiued the gentleman ;
'but it is a matter of business. I
have watched the expert manner in
which you handle ciga;ettes, and,
being an undertaker, I would sort
o' like to get on speaking terms
with your imnediate family.'
PnoUD OF IT.--Sone of the rich
est men in Austin started in life in
a modest wvay, andl are still plain,
unpretentious people, but tiheir sons
put on a great deal of style. One
of the latter, who was better post
ed about other people's affairs than
about his own family's, remarked,
sneringly, to an acquaintance:
'Your father was nothing but a
simple stone mason.'
'I know where you got that in
(frmaton,' (qui(etly remnarkedl the
'From whom did I get it!'
'From your father.'
'Hlow do you know that ?'
'Because your father used to be
my father's hod carrier.'
--With a smnall pieceC of zine and
a bit of silver (any silver coin will
dlo), thie zineC placed on one side of
the afilicted gum and the silver on
thme other, by bringing the edges
together, the small current of de
t ricity genera'ed immediately and
npainlel stonne toothach-'
WIr HE9 WASN'T THERE Now.
Kosciusko Murphy, :who is P
bookkeeper in a grocery house.
met a friend who clerks in a cigai
store on Austin avenue, and aske
him for a cigar.
'Ain't got any,' said his friend
'Ain't got any?' said Kosciusko
*Why, when I used to work in I
cigar store, I always had my pock
ets stuffed with cigars.'
'Yes; probably that's the reasor
you ain't in a cigar store now,' wa
the crushing reply.
-The girls have already foi me<
their plans for leap-year. To th,
bashful lover they will say, 'Do yoi
like home-made bread?' Ithe says
'Yes,' the reply will be, 'Well,
can bake,' Then if he doesn't tak<
the hint they are to seize both hi
hands, fall on their knees an( pu
the question direct.
Although women have the righ
to propose in leap year, there is n<
law that compels man to say yes
This fact ought to encourage th<
young men to stand firm.
-A colored man took his boy t(
an editors office, in search of a jol
for him. The editor inquired
'What cai your boy do?' 'WeI
boss, I don't spose he kin do an1
mo' at fust, dan edick yo' paper
but arter (at when ihe gits mo
sense he kin sweep de flo' an' bl:el
-We will not (iwell on tha
point, said the lawyer when he sa
(lown on an upturned tack.
A110 rrssiI o I19rd.|5.
M. F. A NS I.L. .1. 1# NEWTO&r
'eenrville, S. G. Pickens S. C
ANSEL & NEWTON,
.A /i' Lt) rIeys al Law,
PICKENS C2. HI., S. (
fe b 29-tf
C. E. ROBINSON,
iejkens, S. C.
JT. TI. NIX, .J NIX,
Gr'eenvlle. S. C. llaanpton, S.C
Nix, Robinson & Nix,
Attorneys andl Co'msellors at Law.
I1CKIENS C. II., S. C.
WXill practiceQ ini all the Courts of tlin
State, and( of t he Uniitedl State..
All bu'sinies :hal receire promp
aW(o w. TrAvion. JA MIs P. caRY
TAYLOR & CARY,
IlCI(E N C. II., S. C.
ADAM C. WELDORN,
A'FTTOlHNEY A ND
Counsellor at Law
GH.EENVfLLE, S. C.
Tr'aties inl the State am7
Offlee h. C'leveland Block, over Imja
Weil's (flothing Ilouse.
- A. BLYTIIE. W. D. MAYFIELD?
IBLYTHE & MAYFIELD
COUNSELLORS AT. LAW,
GREENVILIL, S. C
.Practices in the 6/ate and
U7. 8.. Courts.
Prompt attention to all -busIhess.
Aw Office in Law RIange.- -IM
J. A. COOK,
GOODS, &C., AC.,
GREENVILLE, S. C.
Call ou me ard examine the
"Excelsior Cook Stove"
before you buy elsewhere.
2enwj'are (ad .house .Fur
ish ing Goods at short-cro;
I At Wholesale, Cheaper thlua the
1 88 4.
TVe1 w7il sell
thLe 7re77ft aTL
cder of our
at greatly Pe
IF YOU WANT BARGA INS iN
BE SURE TO GiVEUSA CALL.
A Giood Supply of
Always on Hand.
HUDUENS A HUOSENS.
.Easey, S. '7.
DISSO VED BONE Acid
iSAA C WILLIAMS
Easley., S." C.
G IVE me a call, and get prilces
I will be pleased to serve all the
old friends of the Pacifie Guano
mn&d of the Acid Phosphate..
See me at the Warehouse on East
eld of the Depot.
Feb 22-- tf
EASLEY, S. C.
COME ONE, COME ALL
A ND furnish your IIouses in clegant
styl e for the Summer with a nice
Line of Bedsteads, 'Iattresses, Bu
reasI , Tables, Stands, Chairs, Rockers,
&c , &c. U%, A general assortment
of Landscape chromos in 22x30 inch
frames, chord, &c.. all ready for hang.
ingon thewalls. Also, on hand, a line
of cabinet, promenade, panel and card
Size photograph frames. all in artistic
style. Always on hand a full line of
Caskets and colins, )all sizes anId styles.
Bu1rial Robes for each sex, all qualities
and prices. Ready at all hours to wait.
1pol enustonmers. Collins trimmed inl
anly style, an1d wlien So desired, will be
trimm11led anld slipped to -Iny point on
Railroad free of extra charge.
Thanking you for past favors. and
solleiting your further patronage, I am
A. M. ItUNION
18 offered1 for Sale by
W. M. Hagood & Co.
At $35.00 per Ton,
pay/able Nov. 1st.,