Newspaper Page Text
A JOYFUL uit1WTI:x.
iello! How aro you? I an glad at 11af
your eyes have fallen up O1 no. Now tht
we have mot, pray cultivato tho nequaint
anco, for it is MY p>ur1poso to interest an
serve you. Between you and I, though only
newspaper articlo, I am ambitious. Ilavin
a portontous message for all rnanklind, if
be cordially received its import trul r real
ized and aoted upon, I shall be considered i
world's bonefactor. Could have no higho
ambition you will admit..
A misanthrope of ample means deter
mined to end his life by drowning himself
Going to the banks of the canal, sound th<
time not favorablo for the purpose, a num.
ber of persons being in the vicinity, and day.
light still present. He concluded to wala
along the towpath mtil it was dark. Whilc
doing so, lie heard pitoous cries issuing from
tho door of a hovel noner by, aid uncon
sciously walked ovor to the placeo, and found
a poor family consisting of at mother sur
rouudad by several children, who told him
of their sufferings for food. lie took from
his pocket his wallet, and h:udod it to the
woman, reasoning with himself that he
would not need it. The grateful thanks and
praises that he received from the recipients
ofltis bounty awoke emotion in his braost,
of such a plonsurablo charactor, that he
changod his suicidal intent, amid decided to
live for others. His futuro life becaeno re
plete with good deeds-many a dark home
and heart were made bright by his presence.
Well, ly appearance in tlhose columns,
aprin,.;s simply from a desire on tho part of
those I represent, to benetit your news-do.
vouring race. My province is to help you,
your friends, your relations, aye, oven your
mother-in-laaw, if t hat interest iig lady ho not
alrondy far beyond the pale of good inllu
I ani sent among men to hear tidings of a
discovery Iliat Imla rks an epoeh as iniportnt,
to the health of miankin3 as Nowton s apple
and Franklin's kite wore to natural science.
'I'he sick, tho discouraged, the dejectol, tho
broken down, and the despairing, may now
all ihnd a cure, certain a: tho Jordan proved
to the Syrian lepper. Jt is only n .cossary,
as in the case of that sufferer of o'.1, to fol
Tho agent which I herald builds up tho
System, sweep, the cobwebs from the brain,
and sends pure, invigorting blood dancing
through the arterio to the music of happy
''ho gloomy, wornout, man of business, by
troper use of this wonderful medicine, w'll
be onabled to meet trouble aund reverses llak
(t man1. then. in perfect health, lie will not
- have abnormal views of Ih 'Vicissitudes of
fortune, which spares n(ither nun, nor the
1 roudest. of his worlot, which bitries ompire.
und cities in at commnnon gra(ve."
The weak nuitl nervous woman, just. able tc
61 -ag herself, in "nopi inig rulncholv
i lroughl duties o th le day, may steal tic
h oom from 1lushl roses, and have eyes n:
b -ight and sparkling as the dowdrops nc.st.
I ng in their leaves: and ie poor little baby,
1 ow disliguredth i piitples and sebtlh
1 >r.5, 1may be made swot, cool atnd whole.
1 1n) n-'thitt youl;ster of Mrs. Bik's
ros:< the way, t horo fatnily is always in 1
glow of health.'' I)on't yo: know tho rea.
Hon? ' No." 'Ill'i I will tell you. Fo"
yenIs your nei:,lhor 1m1s never bren c h wirhe
Dr. Pierco's (olden Aledical Discovery.
This remedy is at niedicine, iot n Iheverago
and is to be taken necorling to full aund per
feetly plain directions nccompantlying enel
bottle. It is sl+eeitic, but not it pntlent imed
icinto, and contains no vilo narcol ics or vilo;
liquor. It is n prescription used for year:
by the well-known physieiani, Dr. It. V
Pierce, of Bulfalo, N. Y.. whose nnme is I
household word in innatertl)le lhoies al
over our own ild foreign lands. Tha
Golden Mdienl Discovery is prepared ant
ollored to the public by the World's I)ispoll
samy Aledic-l A;socint in, a body cortorlte
existing b 1111(1 under the l,tws of tie Stiti
of New York: its president is I)r. Pierce, tl
great speciali.t. in chrnonic diseas,s. 'I'ht
doctor has devoted the beit yt"aas of n verI
busy aid wondertully successlll life to thl
relief ianid cure i f his su1lior"in;; fellow men
n1nd at. a tiit wh1n1 high polit icat honors lia
broadly open le.ire him, )r. I'ier<o to
signed his seat in t he ('on;ress of t ie Unit el
Sitltes, i y in t.uu n a. tten .i ofily towaIrt
othbers. Ih s ntin t ,s in the gieat saniat ar
m)onFtt bulsinie. if thirnin msiimtion do
paid( to thle gre-at army of 'atien ts crowdini
upon them froin ovuery el inie. Drn. P'ioeoi
also the fouiine of the lninalidis' li0tel a
]htttalo, N. Y. Thimu estalishunient, piossiss.
ing all t he ciomfor ts,nndii luiie'ts if ai first
thisi Amer('iieiitni hitel, I itt ini id,lit ion Ih<
Atnly atiindece of a bitogo facuilty of emil
nient sIicriali ots, whoss." -rael ice ciollectire,ct
cover the( whole fild iif su1rgery and1( eb nom
diseas"es. 'I lho laboirator iy in) which I)i
nrioidi is n iih ject ohfi niten.h mal) weinsler
t. hut a trintge of ~' ime hundried fee0t, a depil11
of one litiolr''e aln t w ety -lit e feil, idi
latial woirkshopil twoi hiiundredl personsi nr
While t he Gobitlen Ale lie:d lDi.' nvery'
it is not miseey a tallponaryi inm inniiit, bui
2ii as certainily a ife iinaliii comlite clr', i
is that eerinin intisery zitil death will foillhn
thei r niei.leet . lir. I 'il-re's G ollein Meldien
D)iscoer'y trill 111/ 'ure eluib ftelt, will ne
retfurniishi inh-ls or legh.ss unfoirItnntr
with new nai peileen liiiilbs, andl it is in
guaiiranitieed tt evin at diozeint tll'- npli I
to antray ort i on 10 oul(f ni ticind hmatii skeh
toni, will dtevielii such*'eibelir into1 1nu ani
is t a)110stedi Iha11t this medseinle w,il l,or tar
iaiid cult ivat iois eniletler'i dI db ea I anm
blecotme ia mi rvioust, arti iticii ai in ., I lie Gold
tohuiim the str'n .n.i Ii - irous. selft.:i-,ii'erl
life, frouim which, almoisi unc'luo -mioly. hn
It i.s clannioe-, anit gu'r: ni ed. if this imeii
eine be uisedI as pr-ceucribr0, andii failthfutll.
p ersoe(red~ ini a ren+m iiole hi- imie, i/ aeill p,1 r
2Iilnenl//// iiir. livern c'omi iniut, andI the vat'
oIf the liver,inun!tl:h,.-r ,u ,,, 11 i, ns oui
(Idioer 1:r.s-inIg lIem poI. isneid or deterjill'
Thbis woniderful medheic n uret all humliore
fromi the worist serl t a,1 eloninoni litc'h
fe'er sores, Senaly or iugh skin. ini shot, al
by3 this laiirful, 11urify. ing and11 invig''rntimi
meici-e eat en dti uleersii ra~.di
unde tis b~n-iign inilnI- 2. 'el etne:d3y l
boirs weaklibunt, scrlti ~of o:ih otith a-oi
twigt, .i: -,wi'i ,.c it-tll -. "or ith(ei
necki5',''n d hirml'ed . l js 'i ' op in.
'romptly saln po riii a--titiveyare.d andc:i-eue
by this veign Itih t Gil ii ienilremedy, it
takenll beftlior th last Din.e a reachitied.
Forcmci we a ue:-, pitinte of blood,ta- cn
'Iumto'bivoardf nicet-weatg. ndi kith-edt aldye
tans, (lin ita toei n r'lIe~'mdy. Fora indi (0
iousnuss," Goden -Il'p d.IIn I: isoveryi heastic
eua(, theri ie electi ptrfet id radientU hur o iil
i. Toiiill i sufei 'fromi he aint. fwearin
desp)bionency, ia in if i:tr o n o I ioni, hi
fmll, woalin or 115 chi;d r I5 r'e'f' s oli.
Mediien( Dilh-isc loeill Isen ii iat
adver,t vi' anhiid it elte, whote sem0
adimiihoi o mtaiiith ; h ex il pre itin te Ion lostcn
ofideeilt Th-estp- wii eti lirman enst ie
and' the felin onlfre wioll oc more5,' enjtioi
ineconnoits'hifllowuus menl( ie, feelin
w-ouldetorpintli tiil Iat 'h i nji beini, onlis:
flons reali by thseinii i-('rfey hen ihi
The olden eiet isey ih n
makoe drunkarde ri'th'e o tpiumintr. 1' frht
contrary an 'iu foirti unti. it ionesyig rale
thversityiheied appet(itea-n, to the usl
thetdio, amt timuti ,1 wilat liii 3 ntheery 1isem'rl
tonitnsuc bindin him teaghoful od mi
ableih ]xisene''wl aia! i oIhei
wouiend it lhlifultd to thii nt iihei sens
Thtlie aiwhoIl nrorale, pa nt, or frmiet
bul,ha ierase thi glomy csalt of ie i'
agmwo abou timem, uthojit-'t wh ona
lie& ev ud n o lsig i
thnihtwoewrd sarye 'is
thmininiitt e h nt toeyt -
to lisuh etths,mesa....ul.o-e
thinge wore soon, as "through a glose
Let no enfferor be discouragcd because he
t or she has tiled other medicinos without
t I,holit. In act, these are the cases the
World's Dispensary Medical Association
I particularly desire to reach through their
Dr. Pierce's Goldeu Medical Discovery.
r When all other medicines fail let fit is be tried,
t and no one will be doomed to further disap
The Golden Medical Discovery is a pre
e scription of a physician with a wide-awake
reputation and an honorable position to
- maintain. It is far beneath the dignity of
Dr. Pierce to lend his namno to any vile nos.
truam, or catch-poinny preparation, whereby
the public may be deceived. Having used
his Discovory for many years in his un
precedented private practice, he is convinced
it is indeed a specille in diseasea mentioned.
Desiring this marvelous curo shall bonefit
not only those with whom he comes person
(illy in contact, but that all mankind may bo
embraced in his gruid plan for tho ameliora
tion of human sulering, the doctor, through
the World's Dispensary Medical Association,
earnestly and most confidently recommends
his G;iden Medical Discovery to the public
at large assured the most skeptical will be
thoroughly convinced of its worth by a trial
of a single bottle.
In stubborn, or long-soated affections, and
tyhore the bowels are very costive, the gentle
though certain act ion of the Discovery, will
be more rapid and satisfactoryby supplment
ing Dr. Pierco's Ploasant Purgative Pollets
in small daily doses of one or two. These
pills (the original and only genuine Little
Livor Pills), are purely vetretable, sugar
coated, and very small, yet by the peculiar
process used in ihoir "reiaration, they pos
s(ss tho strength and virtuo of larger and
unpalatable pills. Pleasant Purgative
Pollets will speedily reimove all ill amnd dis
agreeable effects ar'sing from over-eating or
drinklig, and are recommendod as a ca
that tic at. all times, being perfectly safe, sure
imd unat(tended by tho griping pains usually
expor'enced in the use of purgatives less
carefully prolaredt. Promptly resorted to,
these little Pellets will radically cure indi
gestion, biliousneoss and Sick-hondache01, thus
saving t he patient fronm serious and lingering
disorders. Dr. Pierco, the President. of tit,
World's Dispensury, and his faculty of
t wolve skilled specialists, can be consulted
by lotier or in poirson in any case of chronic
disease rt.guirinig either medical or surgical
treattnm+nt free of chargo. For those desiring
mnorn txhx:1nstivO infortation than can be
tmparted th'ought correspondee, the tieotor
has written a book, called "I'l.e People's
Common lnenso Medical Advisor, in Plain
English; or, Medicine Simpilied."
This work alone is a goodly harvest for an
ordinary life, and stamups its author a pro
fountd sc"holar and at very remarka hlo nuan.
The hook containn nine Lunidrol and twenty
two page.+, illustratted with two huilred ail
eighly-aix wood cuts and colored platte m and
inakes i>lain as a, b, c, anatomy, plhysi
olo.y, matteria nmedicn, practice of itnidicine,
hygiene, teml poramnutents, psychology, etc.
anmid answers in phiiii, easily-to-be-linlea
stootd terms all quest.ions that may ari';
with in their range, especially thos ques
tions the would-be intuirer is deterred by
fo:l', or molesty, from asking tle famlily or
other physician. That all may be onalbled to
attlauaint thonmsolve:s with mnatter so Vital to
healt h, happiness, and success, the prico of
this groat work has lccn fixed at one dollar
and lifty cen-tts, postpaid by mail to ally ad
dros, while sialler and far inferior books,
-Iur>orting to cover t.ho samo ground, have
sold at live dolhar is a copy. It. Iheing the aimi
of the proprietors of the Conuantn ;einso
tedical Advist r to reach not. only the atilu
t t'ut, but, also thoso illnumoderate, ande ovent
sI traitntled, circumstsanc(e-, tIhe prieo of the
w tork places it withint the reatch of all.
SAvixO V'a)I'rAnr,u SEEDs - Dr.
George ''auber gives the following vatl
unblo facts coneerning the "mixing" of
plauts aid its eict upon seeds: If
there are many varieties of the samo
vegetable im It garden it is ipll)Ossiblo to
save the sceats of sonmc ini an unmixed
s taito. Sweot corn an1( di (l o the squash
famnly are qimto sure to "'mix," On
the other hnid, pean d 111 bioins rarely
cr'oss. 11 'ino saves seeds of anty vege
tabie, let it lie of the best. Instead of
leavmng 1the last, pea11 on thme Tines for
- seeds, set llpart a portion oif at row for1
'seed and let none be Pflcked from it. By
,) propor carLe til <lulity oft a v'egetat>io
-may bo imiprov-ed. TIn saving LimaUf
h eanis we have for several years selected
oiily thos~e with four beansii mi ai pod. As
a 'onlseqluenice, the greater innbert' of
i.pos in the wahole crotp now have four1
- hennma. The select ion of thle first ripen
'2( edtand heat-h)rrmed tolmaltos for seed
will hanve a niurked cifect upon future
croIps, iaid this is the case with all other.i
vegetabiles. If one has aL choice melon
he would pr'eser've iin its purity the surm
est liltthott is to fertilize a few female
flhower's. T1ake a male hlower' ot the same
Ikind thlat is slhetding its pollen, remove
t the coriollai, to expose thle stanmen'i. Sc
leet aL fenmile flower thait is just reaLdy to
I openi, but has not been visited by ini
-sects; open it, and apply thme stalmeiis to
-the plistil 01' ,thalt flower'. Cover the
t flowe'rs thius opera'ltedl uponii by ia bit oh
imusiin unitil 1-ni frit b'egins to growi.
Du. GmxxNr.r, in1 a recent sddress
before the V''rniont daiiymeni, conten
died that olcomar'garine, if clen and
pure1", is not uniwhmolsome. It canm nev
erci haivem the ilnot flavor of good but ter',
becauise the hughly volatile oils whlich
give such butter its aroma 111 wanitig
ad lii man ever be added to it-, hut imn all
othier respects, lie saLid, the two aioe
identical. Bumt unt11il thio olil1m)Orgar'ie
. aLkers can sat isfythue puioi that, their
protduct is "'clean andIc purei" there will
coinitme to be ai naiturLal amid not unjust
suicionit of it. Mlost peopie would
pi'efer thle very p)otrest butterm to (oleo
marilgarinoi made hrm nobody knows
whait abom)iina bulO stum11.
TH following is Ia specific for the
(<inashi bug: TJo one barrel of wamter
taImkoI half a bulshl of geood hieunmanuire,
1a1hmi x thoroughuly. Ler. standt, but
sim' imvery three~ ori four' diays, and1( keep
oler it, is the bietter'. Alu,ly to f-lI
v'ines ithl a cosn sprninklr,btut do nmot
use too) much it IL timne, as5 it 1s aI1) pIV
erful fertilizer. 'Tio which we may atLdd
1.hot1 ai spoonflful of' salfhp2tre to every
halt gallou of tech mixtnrom' wil insure
Ih li<testruction1 of tihe bugs. (Gardenis
have biemn known to bie free fronm peits
by the use of sallfpotrie alone, while
squmasheds ini neighblot:,ing gan'is, only
a flow rodts distanlt, whlere o sallltpictro
wams used, wero destroyed by thiemi.
liv meanms of time dri'nalge oh hld the
variomus chiemical act ions which taiko
plaico through tile liction of the atmios
phere' on thme surf'aco soil are carried
downi to ai greamter or less extemit inito
time siusoil, t(ur as tho water level ms
lowered the air' enters from aLbove to fill
the cavit.ies in the soil. ily di'auinage,
also, the deputh to whlich roots will pen
(etrate~ is imeeised, for roots wdil not
- grow ini the absenuce of' oxygeni, and rot
as 800on asi they reach ai permanent wa
TiEnaro miany farmers wh'lo have
. extram good but ter cows and do not knowv
it. They have poor pastur'es in summer
and imo shelter arnd indifferenmt feed in
winter, in the house they have no cou
vemnoe for niakimng butter; flhe milk is
set where there aro no0 arrangements
for keepimng it cc ,J in summer, and ini
,the hiving room, exposed to the odors
of the kitchmen, inm winterm, amnd neither
tIhe quantity nor thme quality or' any in..
TAKING COLD.--Tho Peri8copo says,
"When a person begins to shiver, the at
blood is receding from the surfaee; con- on
gestion, to a greater or less extent, has at
taken place, and the patient has already ol
taken cold, to be followed by a fever, o
inflammation of tho lungs, neuralgia, o
rheumatism, etc. All these evils can
be avoided and the cold expelled by s.]
walking'or in some exercise that will
produce a prompt and dtceidod reaction e
in the system. The exorcise should be
suffiloient to produco perspiration. if
you are so situated that you can get a m
glass of hot water to drink, it will ma- tli
terially ait the perspiration, and in di
every way assist nature in her efforts to oi
remove the cold. This course followed, cc
your cold is at an end, and whatever
disease it would ultimate in is avoided; e
your sulrerings are prevented and your ,
doctor's bill saved." in
AN APPROVED REMEDY-3ased upon
the theory that the food that contains the o
largest amount of carbon or heat, is the s
most offectual in cases of lung diseases, th
in order that the supply of vitality shall at
be kept up beyond the point that the '
internal lover exhausts it, a Western
physiclan has promulgated a remedy
for consumption which in most of its C
component parts is not only familiar eli
but seoms to be in favor even among ne
those who are not all'etect by any dis- tl,
ease, nave a chronic condition of thirst. ps
This prescription is Fimply one-half re
pound of beefsteak; one draohm of pul
vorzed charcoal; four ounces of sugar;
four ounces of rye whiskey and a pint
of hot water. Taking the last three ht
articles and, on the Irish plan for miak- re
ing punch, reducing the amount of %fa- by
ter, it is a medicine that has been taken Tl
for years and certainly by frequent use, to
has a highly oxcitant effect, as
TiE VALUE o' Sou.-The Now York
Timcs says there are hundreds of fami
lies in comfortable circumstances who
never have soup at dinner (which with
out soup is always a failure), unless it an
be a sort of ragout, the product of what ha
farners call a boiled dinner. They are
not aware how easy it is to prepare or
dinary soup, and how cheap it is too. ms
It can be inado of almost anything, and
a pot of 'water pliced on the stove may
be the recipient of divers oddtis and ends we
of meat and vegetables to execilent ad- 10
vantage. After these have been boiled ye
a tew hours there will be found in the &
put a very good soup, wholesome, nour
islhiug, aippetizing, and its cost will be
nominal. It the experiment were tried, of
many families would be surprised and Ti
pleased at the result. They would have inl
a much better dinner for almost nothing wi
than taey have hitherto had any idea of, bu
uid once accustomed to soup they could wt
not be persuaded to relinquish it. A
simple soup benelits at once health, Sc
appetite ant the purse. n
POT CLoSET.-Almost all old-fash- no
ioned New England housekeepers re
serve the httle oloset under the sink for
pots and kettles for no apparent reason ,
except that it is the most inconvenient ia
place to put theni, and that it is impos- 'Y"
bible to'lift them from their hiding pince
without some trouble, What is needed ,
aniong housekeepers is an enterprising 111. .
herelic, with no respect for tradlitions, "'
who will nmke her husband put up a i
sh1(1f in the pantry about two feot from
the floor, and will keep her kettles on
that, TIhe sugar bucket atnttiimolasse5
jug could bo kept luderneath it, the
Irymng-pans could lbe piled upon01 it in a 11
nest, and,( the phots and kett.les could li
stand on it ready to be swung out at at M
steoci's notice. Moreover, they wvould or
be sweeter and1( cleaner for bieing exp)osed mn
to thei air in this way, and the little clos- of
et could beoreserved for the stove brush- thi
3onE 'TmtoATs,-As thre cool inorninga .r
and evenings are coming on' apace, ot
there will be a great niany complaints,
among the little p)eoplo especially, of
sore throat, My little sister .Flora clpent
three weeks with me recently, aind wlel '
here had a slight sure throat for which
1 mixed a hew sp)oonfuls of' v'inegatr withi
enough watter to make it weak enough to
to be s wallowed, addiniga "'bit"' of alum,*
a "pinch'' ol salt and a '"dust" of pep3-ibs
per, A It houigh she is usually averse to b.)
medlicine, she took this eagerly, asking
tor it wh'aiover she thought of it. The
iigred ients are atlways it hand, it is
easily nixed, pailataible, sale and sim-y
p)1e, iand will usually prove all I hat is I
needed in sore throat, frm a cold, t
To H3TAIl(cH COLLT,Js AND CUFFs.- li
Ihoor wax or spermaceti, which cau be 9
procured in aniy drug store, and mix ii
with cold water; then pour boiling wai- "
ter in it until it is thick enough; boil aa
few inuteA, thou rub the starch good
into the collirs, thlen let thlem dry; then
ia hew hours before you are ready to C
ironi, lake a teiaspoonful of starch, (lie- f,i
solve it in cold wuater, about a ipint, then et
dip the collars in it and wring out; roil ti'
in a day cloth, and when you get ready ni
to ironi, do not have the iron too hot, ei
ant iron perf ectly dliy. St
To Sn PNos tlf,E,iui.-Tiake brown
paper and fobl it one-piart or of atn inch he
wide and one andh one-hiatt inches long, at
three or four ply thick, and phraee this hi
Onl th li)upper gums. Hfold it there fir m
wih youri uipper lip. Now hol upright of
the arnm, hiandu aoini iger's, thait are on f
the bleeding side, and p,ress the bleed
ig niostril with the other hitnd, 'hold to
the arm straight up, close to the~ heitd, y
atnd the bleetting will stop in one or two
mninuttes. if you are mu)ich addictet to
bleeding, you had better rot partake of
sweet nulk. CI
10Ioi,Tis IN LOT)r.---A bout, thie end of I(
Octobar put, theo phints rather firnily in a
six or seven inch pois, using any goodl 1
giardeni soil, thoroughly w at( ring when It
inowly potted, iind partially slarling for Li
aL few daiys. if not li(propely watered
tihe leaves will become yellow and the
flowers fnil to attin lull size. K(ept
exposed to the suii, with a cool temnper
iaturo at, night, they will flower well,. h
RiAr PosioN.-Thme lernma extirpa to
rats by turnishing thieim with eaikes gi
maido of -two parts1 sqiuills iand thiroe fi
parts chmopped bacon, ad meal eniough
to make a stI ff mass. TIhe rats go away,
as5 aniy ianiiial of laato naiturailly wvi otldui
it providhed with such a meal.
To cleani stair rods, uso0 wooloIu cloth in
wet with wateir and1( dijpped ini sifted dic
coal ashes; ailterwiards rui. with a dry ho
FREsH cream is the best cure for sun
burn, It draws the fire, soothes and gc
A mIT of sand paper iin the house will to
keep needles sharp iand save annoyance. WI
ONION juice will instantly allay the tm
pain of mosqnito bits. . m
Tals is the seanon when hets ran mad
d will not he comforted unless they
n hide Away somewhere and sit day
d night of a wooden nest egg or an
1 door kzIob. I3everal men were dis
asing thi qnestion in a grocery store
e evening recently, A man who owns
large flool of 1)orklngs remarked:
. ot even an act of Congress can break
a setfin' hen." "Ever tried jammhi'
n under a l,arrel, and pourin' water
'em?" demanded the man on the ou
r barrel, "Yes," said the Dorking
an, "I've poured water on 'em 'till
ey grow .webfooted, like a blamed
tok and afterwards found 'em in an
ii coal hole sittin' away on lumps o
al." "Tie a red rag round one wing,"
id a man who was eating cheese and
aickers. "That'll fix 'em." "Might's
All offer 'em a chromo," said the Dork
g man. "I tied a whole red woolen
it on one last spring, and dog my
t if she didn't make a nest of it and
t three weeks on the buttons '' Then
0 grocer said it was time to close up
id each man girded up his loins and
)wly filed out.
By contracting a severe Cough and
tit, I was compelled to give up 'my
ai'y work and keep to the house. A
ighbor recommended me to try a bot
of Dr. Bull's Cough Syrup; It was
'ocured and 'used; to my astonishment
lief was instantaneous.
EDw. W. CLAYTON, Waverly, Md.
"AnnESTED for carrying a pistol, was
?" asked a Magistrate of an officer,
rerring to a gentleman who had just
en arraigned. "Let's see the pistol."
he weapon was produced and handed
the Judge, who examined it and
"Where did you get it?"
"Bought it at a hardware store."
"What did it cost ?"
"Fine implement. How'll you swop?"
d the Judge drew out a pistol and
uded it to the prisoner.
"Take $10 to boot."
"All right. I'll flue you $1P. That
ikes us even."
Ciiii"rsT FASifoN AJAOAZINE in the
w>d, 120 large pages, 4 pages new music,
00 engravings each issue. 80 cents per
ar; single copies 15 cents. STRAWBRIDGB
CLOTmIER, 8th & Market Ste., Phila.
Tur parents have taken the youngest
their three daughters to the theatre.
icy had had their doubts about tak
one of the elder ones, for the play
a rather of the "naturalistic" kind;
t as for the youngest, poor child, she
nild never see anything wrong in it.
U one of the most "naturalistic"
mee the little mhid observep with all
"You were quite right, ma I It would
verhave done to let the girls see it !"
Ti COnflict of taet Reeen.
ween disease and' ihenlth is often brief and fatal.
i- hetter to be providled with cheap and simpelo
uedle i for such commison disordera as couglhs, coldei,
thau to run the ri'k of e-ontracting a fatal diseaso
ough neloct- i)r. Win. Hlall's nalsam is a sure and
e r,"u<y for all liseses of the luhgs andi cheat. if
et'i it let' i It Is cert:ti to enre, iuiid ay save you
in, thi:it terrible dinase,' Consimiption. It has been
'wn iti userd for muriy years Ini Am:rica, and it is
i-xaitre tion to cay that It is theo best remetty In the
ril<i forought.Iec. Ask for D)r. win. Hall's Unl.
il. .zorm li u,igs. amnd take no other. Sold by all
IT takes an Irishman to turn a comn
ment. When he saw ,Tones after
ving mot-the Jatter with Mrs. J., rat
-Fiaherty said: "Ye are mooch young
than your wife, surr." Presently lhe
.; the wife and remarked: "The idea
tich a young woman marrying Mis
er Jones !" The next (lay lie met them
gethecr, but he wasn't at a loss for
trnley. "Och.," lie exclaimed, "ye
a both of yez too young for each
Pure cod lhver oil, from selected livers,
the scashore, by Caawell, Hlazard & Co.,
Y. Absolutely pure and sweet. Pa
mnts who have once taken it prefer it to
others. Physicians declare it superior
all other oils.
Chapped hands, face, pImples and rough
1.n cured by using Juniper Boap, madec
(Jaswell. Hazard & Co.. New York.
AN Austin justice found a negro gnil
of assault, and addressed him as fol
ws: "I ahall either fine you ten (dol
.s aunc. costs, or send you to jail for
idays." "For goodness sake, .your
nor," exclaimed the young lawyer
in wtas tle prisoner's attorney, "don't
jpose a 1line on the man. Just send
in to jail. Don't rob him of his mon
.I've not get my fee from him yet,
d1 it's almost rent day."
impounld is a most valuable medicine
r lallies of all ages who may be affict
with any form of disease peculiar to
e sex. 11cr remedies are not only put
ill hquiid trmse but in Pills and Loz
ges in which forms they are securely
nt, through the mails.
X., A wrran fellow, has a charming
>ime, lbut the life out doors is so agree.
Io that ho is rarely to be found at his
In despair of ever meeting him one
his numerous creditors sent him the
"DEAuR Sin-I respectfully invite you
pass Friday evening at your house.
Is your hialrfalhng ont- or scalp discas
I? Unrbolir.e, a dleodlorized ex tract ot
troleuim, as now Improved and per
ctedl, Is juset the article you need. Buy
bottle, and, like thousands who are
ing It all over the laad, you witl value
as the choicest of all toilet prepara
"SEOfE'Ts of th'i confessional:
"Is it a sin," asks a fashionable lady
her spiritual direitor, "for mieto feel
easure uhlen a gentleman saya; I an
"It is, my daughter," ho replijes
avely; "we should never delight ir
-"Rough on itata."'
?ioars ont rats, mIce, roaches, fliesa, ants, becO
ga, sk unks, chipiun'ks, gophiers. 150. Drugglsta
"So MIRAN to tell me," she said, plead.
gly, 'i.bat you wouldni't give a fifty
liar bill for this beautiful duck of a
monet?" "I do just that, decidedly,"
replied. "Why, so, Archibald?"
3%eauise the fifty dollar bill is the big
TEAcunn-"If two boys should find
a apples under a tree, how many
muld cacti boy have ?" Bright scholar
"'That would depend upon whether
s one that could lick was apple-hun
A SPONovlBATf is considered a yer
flue thing. We know a young man i
a boarding-house this side of $1ig
Bridge who recently, at the advice of
friend, went out and purchased a spong
about the size of a plug-hat and hung i
up on his door. The next morning b
took his first and last sponge-bath. Thi
is the reason it was his last: As he al
plied the sponge pretty.hard, he fance
on the first rub, that he -was sittin
down upon two miles of hornet's stini
covered with red pepper. And this
the reason the sponge . felt so: The a
ternoon before, the landlady went u
stairs and used that sponge to wash ti
dog, and the dog had just been out in
back lot rolling on a pile of gravel at
Frnanr Xse Grease.
One grearing Jnsyt- two weeks; all others tw
or three days. Do not be mposed on by bt
humbng stuffof:re'J. sekyour dealer forFri
zer a,with label on, 8ave your Mpjaber.s
3 o t too. It r cetvedjirdt-tltedat at the Oentes
nial and Paris Exposittons. Bold everywhere
"DEAnasi, sweetest, what is It? Ai
you sick? What ails my precious pet',
and the young husband bent tender]
over the graceful form of his blushin
"Oh, Adolphus Edward, it's t<
dreadful for anything."
"Bad news from home ?"
"Worse, worse? Oh, what shall
"Tell your own darling hubby."
"It's that awful Selina Tarbo:
"She's what, my precious ?"
"She's got a bonnet trimmed exact]
like mine and to-morrow's Sunday 1"
Then the afflicted beauty buried hI
face in her husbadd's breast and trickle
her pearly tears all over his $3 shirt.
Emory's Little Cathartic Pill-bei
made for Liver Complaint and Billousnesi
Tasteless, hartnless, infallible. 15c.
Tim latest story is that of a man wh
can heat a bucket of water in ten mir
utes by just sticking his nose into it
That's easily accounted for-his nos
has got a boil on it.
AN English agriculturist announeE
as the result of careful experiment an,
observation, the conclusion that wher
corn is drilled from east to west th
yield is much larger than when drille<
from north to south, as in the forme
case the sun can shine down the rows
whereas in the latter case each rot
makes a kind of wall' which shades th
next row. There is so much commoi
sense in this that many will wonder wh
they did not think of it before.
Mother Swan's Worm syrup.
infallible, tasteless, harmless, cathartic; for Ie
verislness, restlessness, worms. constipation. 26e
To PnOTEoT FAMu ToOLS.-An excel
lent preparation for the preservation o
the iron work of farm implements, ma
be made by the slow melting togethe
of six or eight parts of lard to one c
resin, stirring till cool. This remain
semi-fluid, always ready for use, tho re
sin preventing rancidity, and supplyin,
an air-tight filn. Rubbed on a brigh
surface ever so thinly it protects a>l
presei ves the polish most effectually.
O ASTrixNi x houi( bo taken before or afte
meals to insure perfect assimilatin of food
GA STiN~ E is In liquid form. By all druggist
THE CULTrVATION OF CELERY.--Dwal
celery should alwuys be planted on th'
level surface of the ground. The larg
varieties may be grown in shallow trex
ches from four to six inches below tb
surface. Better success will be attained
and with less labor, by sowing the see
where the celery is to be grown, tha:
by isowing in a seed-bed and tranaplani
ing the plants to shallow drills or trert
ches. The benefits arising from th:
method of culture are numerous.
Use St. Patrick's Salve, and lean its gre:
value. One trial convinces.
A nESIDENT of Oil Creek warnsi frun
growers against using petroleum on fin:
trees and shrubs.It kills all trees aroun
where it is pumped,he says,and a neigl
boring orchard painted with it oar)
one spring showed a handsome bar
and fine fruit that year, but decline
Ladles and chiluren 's boots and sho<
cannot run over if Lyon's Patent He
8iffeners are used.
CARnOLic acid of ammonia, in t11
foot-bath, will oure perspiration of th
The quick, complete cure,al' annoylng Kidne:
Bladder andi Urinary iset.9o1. Druggist.
IT is not strange that many great pc
iticians have been enthusiastic fishe:
men. Not so much that they take pleal
urc in pulling strings.
What the great restorative. Hostetter's Stomne
Hlitters, w'Ill do, must be gathered from what it hi
done. 11 has effected radical cures in thousand
of oases of .;yspepsia, billous disorders, mntermui
tent fever, no, Yous affections, general debult
constIplation, sick headache, mental despondeno
and the peculiar complainta and disabilli i
Which the feeble are so subject.
For Bal e y allugs,. andal'ners. ..ner...
lSEiVRAL of ou exhanges are devot
a ing considerable epaod to the importance
a of "cooking girls." It's no use. We
a don't want then cooked. -The raw damt
e eel is good enough.
WOMAN CAN HEALTH WO
g 8 PATHIZE WITH IS THE HOPE d
i[ WOMAN. THE RACE
Iy . rr s
o L,YDIA E. P1NKHAM'S
I A Suro Cure for all FEMALE WEAK.
NESSES, Including Leucorrhea, Ir.
regular and Painful Dienstruation,
Infulaunation and Ulceration of
tlao Womb, Flooding, PRtO.
LAPSUS UTERI, & e.
tPIleasant to the taste, eficacious and immediate
in its effect. It is a great help in pregnancy, and ro
livoes pain during labor and at rcgular periods.
PlYSICIANs USE IT AND PRESCRIBE IT FREELY.
,d WFoIL AM. WEAKNRSEs of the genorativo orjeanr
of either sex, it is second to no remedy that han erc
been before tho public; and for all diseases of tha
KIDNEYs it is tho Go-catest Remedy in the I) orld.
it 3"'KIDNEY COMPLAINTS of Either Sex
Find Great Rplief in Its Use.
LYDIA E. PINKHAM'S BLOOD PURIFIER
will eradicate evor vestige of Humaors from the
0 Blood, at the samae t-ime will give tone and strength to
thesystem. Asmarvellousin resultsastheCoinpound.
trBoth the Compound and Blood Purificr aro ,re.
pared at 233 and 235 Western Avenue, Lynn, Mass.
e Prico of either, St. Six bottles for $5. The Compound
is sent by mail in the form of pills, or of lozenges, on
receipt of price, $t per box for either. IKrs. Pinkham
freely answerf, all letters of Inquiry. Encloso3cent
stamp. Sond for pamphlet.. Mention this Ptaper.
ItLvDnA E. Pr-Ira.'s Lrvn Pr.s euro Constipa
t lion. Bilouynesu and Torpidity of thu Liver. 2 conte.
e JG-Sold by all l)ruoulmta.*iI .8),
r Vital Questlons I I
P Ask the most eminent physielan
Of any school, what is the best thing in
the world for quieting aad allaying all irri
u tation of the nerves and curing all forms
V of nervous complaints, giving natural,
childlike retreshing sleep always?
And they will tell yoi unhesitatingly
"Some form of Hops I"
Ask any or all of the most eminent phy
f "What is the best and only remcdy that
can be relied on to cure all diseases of the
Y kidneys and urinary organs; such as Brights
r disease, diabetes, retention or inability to
retain urine, and all t,he diseases and all.
s ments peculiar to Women"
- "And they will tell you explicitly and
i emphatically "Buchu."
t Ask the same physicians
"What is the nost reliaile and surest
cure for all liver diseases or dyspensia, coli
stipation, indigestion, biliousness, mnalarial
rfever,ague, & et."and they will tell you:
S Hence, when these remedies are com
bined wIth others equally valuable
j And compounded into Hlop Bitters, such
a wonderful and miysterious cturative pow
e er is developed which is so varied in its
operations that no disease or ill health can
e possibly exist or resist its power,andl yet it is
harmless for the most frail woman,
jweakest invalid or smallest child to use.
"Almnost dead or nearly dyinga
-For years, and given up by physicians
s ot Bright's andother kidno y diseases, liver
comnplaints, severe coughs called consump
tion, have been cured.
t Wornen gone nearly 'crazy I
From agony of neur.ilgia, nervousness wakeftal
neats nud various tiseassea pecal air to womoataa.
People draiwn out of shape froan eruciating
partes of ithaeuamattai;.
it Inflaanmatory andi chronic, or auffering fromn
t- SaLt, rheumaj, blood poisoning, dyspepsia, indiges
7 ion, ant i li f act ilmost all tilseasca fraal
YNaataare isheir to
k Ilave laeen curedl by iiop Biters, proof of wihich
d can hie rountd in every neighbornoodi in tihe kinown
r] sto hao n, hines.
$72 A WEEK. 42 adtay at hromooasily made. Costiy
MEor::hlane IEatbi t4,a. ed ini 10
timer ancd the publshar by stating
that ,tley s:6w the_ advertisemessa si|
tais i6iiF-eakma lness Ps5asser.
TIIE P1iTATA, FAfiiMEil, OF PIILADE1
touandIa thre isa a geaaeral desire aopn ; arms an 1rne
nF iay o.oata an inaprov Far ra wei kn
atnaaaas. ame Steel-PliatI Engrn aangs-sup,erb reracin
ale p ra. a of thec pa.>er ;-anat wna we gave,nad ti . i
was [ ~t> la ' ara cE Iorsaat na I er f b
lts charaacter and uatalC aniona are of alt Iiaa. bet,and Saubscr
*, i oa at a raaa iu a c St..e i Il.aat I ravaaa ubcrib
crcrnsan.a Th en'aies are suI thaatr. t Tssio an
the Farms. Saubscribea for alhe "'l C IRCcI.I FAMai
5:.aar rc i andth aarreana naaaaaier afth la RM IR l
crpo nais athec pae coananued fr one year. As a.oa
orilen dass fromeate,. we will award ano eaa.ha of aheaan ap
sci n ai s i Cr will have a f ar an< it< ja. ainr raaii Ia, a a
as givea n wy. Thae e Faraas and ne.ras a-re inateatled
entirely ratuatous aapn oar pat,- au Is inteaandla biy us as
va l ble 1 na as as will Ide a aa < sa cu I n e ii e _
TICA . FAl-R MlR. l-av nag nmade upi ouar minda toI
secuare,at any cosa.h largrsest circualain of aty
AgricualtuaraI Paper an liae w.riai, we hanve resolvedi
In rego n i arnaa na re uar Saualte r lle
the paresena ana fuature large circualationa. A .amaple
Paper contlaininag adescrilation of thei nrvinags andl
a ar is, nrar.s willh al aascripaoa .1 ab l i tlae rve.
pa er cotrita f rSi n l s ina
awaIl ietegte-po h Calb a saabscripa on tar haimaself
scr al,atnotan one of thae Farms. For so subascribers an I
and$5. thrr sub.crpliaaas -n ta osubls ribers, fouar ct
srton;fo40saabsaribaers anda o, six extra sublscripations
sublscrib,ers anti $ano. we wvii give eightl extra saubscripains
th te-pof the Claab decsares. Hach of whomnn will taye
n aae svum iw ,0 sr
Remmbe ouap ru e a Fariat waorah $3.000 or San a
hae en oeal wal lia nin Trt ConanSubs
500MEN, WOMEN AND CHILD
yeaarself. neighblor, or parenti, a fine Farmn
J.- uWo.wlll mail
wwuu ARgMl 0biaWeek1yTaiBsu
4ud . FAnMMIi, overy
months, on trial, to
any addrella, on re.
cerpt of only 12 cents
in tamp to pay post.
ago on 12consecutive
Wreekly, or for twenty
flive cords, silver or
stampy. we will mail
theTRiBUNE & FAR.
MRR every Week for 6
sending uis clb ol
four twenty five cent
send a sample of 81.
eremiums, choice of
Butter Knife Bug
PeIIUN nci 'AM , hon.
-aicly frt-class Da
ttnality Regular .*'0 a year. Established
12 yearl._ 'atures. original articles. r
1o, to fandce store o ey in one
month than you ver did before. 10w to
Make thre Fartss Pay li,ow FarAt.
erAs are Swindled by bogus Commission
berchauts, h orse and stold auctions, etc.
D. D T. MOORE, .
Founder and for twenty-lvo years editor of
8foore's Rural Netu-tsurker is tho A icultural
Editor of the TRIBNE and FARMER, and con
dlucts the best and liveliest Agriculural Depart
ment to be found in any weekly newspaper in
this couantry. Special writers on Smnall Fruitn
Carket Gardening, ortoultural Matters, ooi
cultural Machinery, with a list of Agricul ural
Enventions wcokly, P'hiladelphia Market Reports,
Answers to Correspondents, &c., &c., Half dozeoi
4partrlettdd Stories every wea l, H oAuse.
Ihold -3egaarttttenlt, whole page ever
iweek. Original letters from lady readors on all
household topies. IRegular Correspondents
Auttst Addie,A><znt Eava,"'4Mayielle.'
and a dozen others. Fealacy Worin, Fast.
Drmnlots. EHow to Entertsa Compansy,
Care of Chtildren, Doctor's Advice, and Cooking
Rtecipes, worth double sublscription price, Youth'.
Deatun, Stories, Puzzles, and Homno Amnse
ments, 11ose icinnter's H[umnorous Letters
Detective Sketetes, and Answers tc
Correspondets. No Sensational trash. Addrea4
H. K. CI}R'I'IS & CO., i'nhs, l'IIILADIILPIIA, PA
CI,ti,l n a che: p by the hundred nab th inillion.
encd 5 fora:iples or price ist. TlE") VII..
JI.iAE trOslE t 40.. sIritlgecport. C'onu,
____ per cent proit Lady and'ent Agents wanted.
rU anplo by n al, 2u Agents' Novelty Co., FA
utl ngtonl, lit.
T E SUN Is the People's
''hern is no nystery ahouct its loves and hates. It is
for Lie hoto't narn agailnnt the rognea every time. It
li for tho hnocest Demnocrat as against the dishono t Ito.
p bl.'can, uad for the honest lieputolican as against the
dlh+honest )eioet'at. Subsription : DAILY (4 pages),
by noll. lllc. a lnenth, or 80.60 a year; SUNDAY
tM Ipagoes), $1.20 per year; w'i}tKI.Y (8 pages), 81.00
1. W. ENGLAND, Publisher, Now York City.
D oend11'or tht "Health Helper"
FREE "*" a "aig
!'efect Health. I.lliox104 Bull o,N.Y.
$65 d TEACHERS
Light Budiness in your county. Address,
P. W. ZIEGLE I& CO., 915 Arch St., Philadelphia,
RUPTU E -
s nbumbsuaya d yte illetse
Hba r4at eaebn u rvan Qotuaal e
at H,ci, Mbe as the mo eoafla metaw (ham.N of or. J.
IL MATES. Ma o4l, , .3l Arch Simi.t, Pblladelphlei, Pr, A4.I.aM
IMA4 e(ampR h taaalsaof patias " .ad b noob ,Q,.
Re se House Reading Pa; Hersehey House
Custer House, Fort Wayne, Ind.; Ion1no ote
AtEltI ,I'IO LADIES
of good address to aell
WAt5NVTEDD5V AX, r'hogoode
are l'Ilt,1'-Cf,ASS. ('HEAP, and s""i readily. For
1 artie,laers addres.4 I , IS I1. P0AANE, Room 14,
Standard Block, Clevclnnd. Ohlo.
YOUNG EN RJ yu wat to b(conle I .
guarantc:cd eiipaoymnent, a.ldres 1'. W. iE i W A..a.O.
"THE BEST 18 CHEAPEST."
"""-T H RESH ERS""s.
(8uited toali sectlona.) Write forFVAEEIlus.Ptne Ane
andPries. to The Aultman ak Taylor Co., hlansfleld. OhIo.
FORL TIHE f
Cre o unin, holfa neumon i Is
Zlamne, Anth fiuraCs Who'oi l,
Canals ast all isennen ofj~ a rnhn
Organa. It soothen mne he ath he Meanbrane
of the I,ungs infanted and posonced by the
disean',?urottprevestnt the n i hI Weats nutal
tilhtu,nens across lico chesat w tnecorni,auy
/MA ll ,Aa Incurae you,1 eveny
thuI rf',eun aid fia.li.
11CUREIS WHERE ALL ELFIL,
BetCuhSyrup. Tastea good.*
Use in time. Sold by druggista.*
A.4NMWAIT-Ils for tile Best and Frastest.
selling Pictorial iBooks and Bibles. ceo re.
Scet:i per cotnt. N ATIONAL PUn Co.. Phi da.. Pa.
P.B C COLAIA BUSINEHS COLLEGEj~
Iiie Near LN. l J.-At fortalnernoli)
e blo(oiy'8 s N:w T1AILonI Sysat i of.
1)u.e(UTTISO. D . MAoody &Co.,31W ~. lth,c(in.
& Sure Lure mor Iilopwy ~or Fits in 24 hours. Free it,
1poior. Da. KnaUsE. M44Areoina t.. Sit. Louis. 31o
1 OUNG .MEN car 'tELEonAPHtYlcore anid
Crrniianre free. VA L'.'IN i ~. snosviio,tn.
PIJIA from an intimate acquaintance with its readers, has
,wn r,ta treal estae m an han carefacly selectc be crit
Ve also offer, in conn,ec tlonithi the Farmi property, as Pre.
fthen works of the greiatest mastes. These are alone worthc
r I rerlcnlt t itan a nuan. I iir rAI 1arm we are rnacn
lIde't Agricu,ltural. l,iter.ary andh Famity Journals plshalded
s eltrZroma our lasts. It h,as a6 pages, publishecti
L.ocatedInatheoStates s 3I ACRES
ot Kansas, MIssouri,ANsa WORTH
Dakota, aggregatingO g *
Ss are ali an goenndhite ion a are in z
ad worrth from ide&o t( $ao.noo each. Thle F'arns wil Iihe
Ig sIOhElEt 01 J InNAT ~ar atre was har
lis are jaust as gorad. a wall produace as muchd undler lke
it.gi Ia aeaiately aaton rocr aing 1 u c ata lo are
Ill"e maaaiaed to the senater, his name entered uapon eour suaa.
1 as we have .o.nto new St' -ribaers rn l5teredI on our baooks
n ..i ag'e 'itng no a1 ,e 5ta,,.i sche a mnne ha t
tcr Preiuaas aaatil alt rhe are 5 o.owrt tof oert
a lin ao aiavidinag with our Subascribiers the poisof the
WHO WILL RECEIVE THE
10,000 FARM? 4
name and Iynur friendIs naames may lbe among the first series
ts it>mI the firt 2o0.0o wortha ofl proporty wIll b e awiad
Pe is f t , wi io saa siri>ers ant sent ,t we
PR E E whi iwill Ive hi a ata right with otheor stat
40 ae wlgve twt e urptiaos t or u mubsritbera
tr subscriptn fr3 subscraibers anal $7, fivec extra suh.a
r 45 sbsc riers.,sevnetra saabscripttons t andi for 5n
ao ea su nrton carn Ie sent to any one to whloma
an e tctulal totuity iato obtain one of the Fiaram. Ba
m. I.ei evry reader taf thits aavertisement send at ICe(t
re antIw a tvetrilte atc ja .000 worth of paroperty at once.
rersr tae Iedsh aid Alstracts of Title to ali thle Farmsy
RIMER, P'alladelpl Pa.