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s. e. boney, Editor.
advertiser printing company
laurens. s. c.
Kates for Advertising. ? Ordinary
advert isements, per squnre, one inser
tion, $1.00; each subsequent insertion,
50 cents. Liberal reduction made for
Obituaries: All over 50 words, one cent
Notes of thanks: Five cents the line.
Entered at the postoflice at Laurens,
S. C. as second class mail matter.
LAURENS, S. C, MAY 20, 1908.
Elsewhere in this issue is reproduced
an excellent editorial from our es
teemed Circcnwood contemporary, the
.Journal, on the subject of the church
member's responsibility. Wo commend
it to our readers as a good, sound, com
mon sense treatise, and just now it is
especially pertinent to our people.
If South Carolina will instruct her
delegates to the National convention
let's tag them so the people can spot
our mummies without any inconveni
The campaign is coming on soon ami
doubtless there will be some candidate
who thinks he is being persecuted as a
political martyr. Here is an excerpt
from a speech delivered by Senator
Jeffries Davis that would serve admira
bly for such a case. Use it, poor fel
low, nobody will know the difference:
"Go damnable imps of pelf and greed,
I defy your taunts! Tear to fragments
my political career. Lash my poor
form into insensibility. Gnaw from my
Stiffening bones every vestige of quiv
ering Mesh. Howl in wretched bestial
ity through my own innocent blood as
it drips from your fiendish visages."
Get it down pat; it's a peach.
There is no other State in the Union
like Georgia during a campaign year.
A woman married a man by the name
of Reason the other day. She has
blundered fearfully; for, if Mrs. Rea
son lives up to her name she will be
come an oddity among her sex, and if
she does not her name becomes a mis
In the name of Reason, what did she
When a man succeeds in working off
a bad quarter why does he feel as if he
had earned a quarter?
The cry in Georgia this summer:
peaches, peaches everywhere, but not
one drop of brandy.
A young woman recently won first
prize for oratory at Cornell. There is
nothing really surprising about this for
the daughters of Lve have ever been
prize winners in talking contests.
Mr. William Rummage married Miss
Mary Sale out in Missouri the other
day. The Rummage-Sale notices were
no fakes that time.
Prince Helie De.Sagan is going to re
nounce his religion in order to marry
Madame Anna Gould. We are de
lighted to hear that the noble prince at
least has a religion.
But men do act silly ?sometimes.
A New York man killed a little girl
because, he said, Cod directed him to;
the sheriff up there will doubtless di
rect a killing pretty soon.
A Northern girl has started a hum
ming bird farm. We predict a hum
A Texas preacher is advocating re
form in the present funeral ceremonies,
but he is unable to arouse much inter
est; no wonder, for nobody is specially
desirous of using the thing, and those
who need it do not specially care.
We are not at all particular about our
ceremony, except something to prevent
Greenville has decided to pave her
main streets; so has Greenwood, and
now Newberry is agitating the matter.
Citizens, just see the good of our ex
ample; soon all these towns around
here will be taking the city of Laurens
as a model.
Speaker Joe Cannon is seventy-two
years old, but no one has accused him
of being in his second childhood.
A New York man gave up his seat in
a street car to a lady and immediately
dropped dead. Strange how effects
differ on different men.
Our platform: Whiskey drinking is
dangerous to say the least of it, and as
a citizen we refuse to help create de
mand for a commodity which may harm
us or others.
Our platform: Whiskey selling is
wrong in principle, inherently wrong;
and as a citizen and voter we refuse to
authorize its sale.
These Laurens people do believe in
Laurens; and after all there is only one
Some one suggested the place where
the court house now stands for the new
government post office building. That
would be better than the present condi
tion, but we believe the public square
is tho place for the monument to the
Laurens county Confederate dead and
a park surrounding. The square be
longs to the county; tho county fur-,
nished as noble and brave soldiers as
fought in the four years' struggle,
whose memory is honored in the erec
tion of a monument. There is no spot
in Laurens so well suited for the site as
the center of the public square. Let
us hear some discussion of the matter.
The patrioti spirit of this city was
certainly demonstrated last Tuesday
evening by the magnificent audience
that greeted the home production at
the theatre for the benefit of the Con
federate monument. It wis simply
glorious, that's all.
True, we have a lot of dust here but
it is not so objectionable as the Green
We fancy the Merry Widow style of
hals originated in the Fiji Islands.
"Women seldom laugh," says an ex
change. Correct. They laugh only
when they are not talking.
There is inconsistency somewhere:
some of the newspapers that are al
ways hammering at Roosevelt and his
policies are the very ones to praise
Rryan who himself says that Roosevelt
has adopted his (Bryan's) policies.
Maybe these papers are better Bryan
ites than Bryan himself.
"Prohibition for Laurens county" is
tho cry. Take it up, voter, and pass
Announcements for the legislature
arc unusually slow about coming in this
year. What is the matter?
Muzzles are at present being exten
sively used in Florida for dogs. Has a
man muzzle been invented? Wonder if
I we couldn't get a shipment this sum
mer, seeing it's campaign year.
Almost every newspaper in the coun
try has the habit of advising the farm
ers about their crops. The Abbeville
Press and Banner has sworn off and in
that connection says:
"Some of the newspapers arc giving
advice to farmers. Will some gentle
man give us the name of a farmer who
looks to his county paper for instruc-'
tion? When newspapers can run farms
better than tho man who does the plow
ing we would like to have a certificate
to that effect. This editor several years
ago tried to show farmers how to make
money on the farm. After giving them
several lessons he was nearly bnjke.
This same editor now thinks if a man
can run a fairly good newspaper he
might be satisfied.
Now as to advice on the detailed work
of the farm, the planting, the time for
gathering, the kind of plow that should
be used, the crop for certain kinds of
land, etc., ?we say that in matters of
this kind the newspaper is wasting time
trying to instruct the farmers. But
there is a way in which the papers can
be of material service to the farmers,
and that is by careful observation of
conditions all over the country and im
parting this information with his com
ment and opinion thereon. The farm
ers have not the opportunity to see or
read as many agricultural and commer
cial journals as the average newspaper
man; hence, they are not in possession
of many facts that would he of service
For our part we intend to keep up
with the way things are going in this
country and let our constituents know
what we think of these things. As to
advising them how they shall run their
farms we are not so foolish as to at
Laurens is just about the hardest
place to gather news in that we have
tackled. This is no reflection at all,
nor is it evidence that there is nothing
doing here; it means simply that the
people do not talk liberally. By :,ome
this may be considered a commendable
trait, and indeed it would be if we had
reference to bad news and every day
gossip; but that is not our subject just
now: we mean NEWS. Somo days we
meet a citizen on the street or at his
place of business and after passing the
greetings of the day, ask: "Well, is
there any news on your side of town
today?" Almost invariably the answer
comes back, "Not a thing, I believe."
Lingering a few minutes (and right
here newspaper folks get a good excuse
for loafing) we talk on a little while and
directly out comes a fine piece of news -
all unintentional and unthought of be
Now, good friends, we are not quar
reling at all; indeed we have no right
to quarrel or kick; we aro just asking
that you lend a hand in making a live,
up-to-date, newsy paper for our town.
The name of this paper is the "AD
VERTISER" and we want it to adver
tise Laurens and to do so completely.
To accomplish this the support of all
the people is a positive necessity. The
publication of bad, disagreeable news
is not our specialty . out we want the
NEWS. So. ladies and gentlemen,
please talk. We have a phono and the
news gatherer is "sometimes" on the
streets. So again, PLEASE TALK.
A man travelled 104,000 miles for a
wife, so says a newspaper report. Hut J
that must have happened long ago, or
at least not during a leap year.
But maybe he was in flight all this
distance and cornered at last.
What are the issues in the South
Carolina senatorial contest, and who?
********* * t't * * *??*?;? *** * ?* ** ??
I AMONG THI: EXCHANGES, j
************v v 4f; * %
Sijm of Good Fellowship.
Reaching around to the hip-pocket j
can no longer be admitted in the courts
as an evidence of hostile intent. It is
now becoming the orthodox motion of
happy fellowship.- Augusta Herald.
The Thought of It.
The editor of the Laurens Advertiser
wants to know what is the exact value
in terms of dollars and cents of a kiss.
He has no business thinking of such
things.- -Union Times.
Missouri boasts of a rooster that
hatched out a brood of chickens. The
old hen was doubtless gadding about
showing her new Widow Hat to her
'Depends On the Girl.
A young man in Union says the exact
value in dollars and cents of a kiss de
pends on the girl you are kissing. He
says he would pay $100 to kiss some
girls and then some girls would have to!
pay him $100 to kiss them.
Backward Is Sometimes Forward. 1
The Baptist church at Laurens pro
poses to have its members vote for pro
hibition. In case they think dispensary
is better than blind tigers something is
to be done. A long ago church and
state were separated, but it seems that
the tendency of the times is to take the
back track. ?Abbeville Press and Ban
What Ought the Churches to do ?
Rev. W. W. Leathers, of Anderson,
writing in the Baptist Courier has the
following on the action of the Laurens
Baptist church :
"I have been seriously thinking for
some time of the advisability of all
churches withdrawing fellowship from
members who as candidates go over the
county or state advocating the sale of
whiskey. If it is wrong to sell or drink
whiskey, it certainly is wrong to en
dorse the business, encourage its use or
make laws in its favor.
"The church members who as candi
dates go around advocating the whiskey
business are usually very prompt in
telling that they are members of the
church; that they drink their drams,
that the church members run the dis
pensaries, etc. The inference is the
church endorses the whiskey business
in general and their conduct in particu
lar. The churches, as a rule, are
against the whiskey business and they
ought to say so. Church members not
only ought not to vote for whiskey men
but they ought not to hold them in
"I rejoice in the stamT taken by the
First Baptist church of Laurens, in
which that church, as reported in the
daily papers, proposes to hold every
member of the church amenable who
votes for the dispensary in the coming
election. This is as it should be; and I
suppose there is no church in the state
Unit can more consistently take this
high stand than those Laurens breth
ren. For a number of years they have
bad an enviable reputation in spiritual
things; and they are right in the posi
tion they have taken in this matter.
"Well done for Laurens! If only
when the time comes there is a readi
ness to do that which they now will.
What a glorious thing it would be if
every Baptist church in the state would
withdraw from every member who ad
vocates or votes for the whiskey busi
ness. The time has come when the
church should publicly and positively
refuse to stand for the liquor business
or its advocates; and I hope the posi
tion taken by the church at Laurens
will be followed by many other church
es in the state during the year."
Weak Kidnoys, turoly point to weak kidney
Nerves. Tho Kidneys, like thoIHeart, and tho
Stomach, Pud their Wdkknots, not In tho organ
ltse.ll, but in tho nerves that control and guido
%nd strengthen them. Dr. Shoop's Restorative n
? medicine specifically prepared to nach theso
controlling nerves. To doctor tho Kidney* alone.
It (utile. It is a wasto of time, and ol money as
II your back ache* or It weak, if tho urine
tcaldi, or lit dark and strong, if you have symptonn
of Bright* or other distressing or dangerous kid
ney disease, try Dr. Snoop I Restorative a month?
Tablett or Liquid?and sen what it can and will
Co tor you. Druggist rocoroinond and toll
PALMETTO DRUG CO.
No Man or Wo
will be complete
did time to make
selections ? the
picking is so good. Later some of the best styles will begone and
sizes will be missing.
There's not a good thing or a new thing* in Low Cut Shoes for
Men or Women we are noc showing. '
Oxfords in Button, Blutcher or Lace Styles, Handsome Ties
and new Colonial Buckles.
The Ribbon Ties, Pumps and Colonials with Buckle and Rib
bon trimmings for Women's wear are exquisite creations.
$2, $2.50, $3, $3.50, $4, $g to $6.
Oxfords should be
fitted carefully and
We're experts at
fitting and we have
every size and width
in every variation.
This way for Choice
The One Price Store
Customers' Shoes Shined Free.
Alt. Gallagher Matters.
Mt. Gallagher, May 16.?The cool
spell has about broken and the farmers
in this section are rejoicing at the re
turn of warm weather.
There are still a number on the sick
list, although nothing to compare with
the weeks past. Mr. Furman Martin
is practically recovered and is able to
be out again, while Mrs. Matilda Ann
Unland is slowly convalescing.
Mrs. P. A. McSwain, with her little
daughter, came over from Anderson
and spent Saturday and Sunday with
her mother, Mrs. J. N. .Jones.
Mr. Broadus Davis and wife, of the
Poplar Springs neighborhood, spent
week-end with Mr. YV. W. Gaincs.
Mr. James K. Saxlon and wife, of
Ware Shoals, spent Sunday with Mrs.
J. N. Jones.
Rev. Geo. M. Sexton filled his regu
lar appointment at Mt. Gallagher last
Sunday, the services being attended by
a large crowd. Mr. Sexton came from
Laurens to Mt. Gallagher and already
he has impressed his people here as a
line man, an excellent preacher and a
lovable pastor. Under his able preach
ing the church has grown in numbers
and in grace. At the service last Sun
day the ordinance of the Lord's Supper
NINE Cllll I)REN BITTEN.
Mad Dog Scare at (ircenvillc-'Dog's
Head to be Examined.
Greenville, May lf>. Nine children
and a negro nurse were bitten by a
Collie puppy here yesterday, and fear
ing that the animal was suffering with
rabbles, the attending physician di
rected that the dog be killed and the
head sent to the Pasteur Institute in
Atlanta for a careful examination. The
dog was undoubtedly suffering with
some disease. One of the physicians
said it might be acute indigestion. The
parents of tho children are naturally
very much disturbed and the result of
the examination of the dog's head is
awaited anxiously. Several weeks ago
another child was bitten and as a re
sult of the examination the offending
dog was declared rabid. The child was
treated at the Pasteur Institute and no
ill effects have appeared.
The stockholders in the bank of Gray
Court are requested to meet at Gray
Court at 10 o'clock Saturday morning,
May 23rd. Permanent organization
will be made and officers elected.
The regular spring examination of
applicants for teachers' certificates was
held Friday in the court house by the
members of tho county board of educa
tion. The examination was taken by
eleven white and the same number of
Weak women should read my "Rook
No. 1 For Women." It was written
expressly for women who are not well.
The Rook No. A tells of Dr. Shoop's
"Night Cure" and just, how these sooth
ing, healing, antiseptic suppositories
can be successfully applied. The book
and strictly confidential medical advice
is entirely free. Write Dr. Shoop, Ra
cine, Wis. The Night Cure is sold by
Palmetto Drug Co.
Grand Pianos and
Hereafter McCord, the Piano Man, will use this
space to present attractive piano propositions. If
you desire to be informed about pianos, or to pur
chase a Piano at the very LOWEST PRICE and
on the very best terms, it will pay you to see or
Notice the names of a few of
His Valued Patrons
in this immediate section;
Many other purchasers throughout South Carolina
could be mentioned, but a few home purchasers
are mentioned, and it is hoped, they will not be
offended by this presention.
Dr. L. S. Fuller, W. C. Hipp. j. L. Boyd,
Mrs. M. A. Fike, M. H. Fowler, Mrs. jJi j^' McCord
J. Walter Gray, R. W. Nichols, Mrs.' Albert Burns.'
C. L. Fuller, Mrs. Luther Roper, Mrs. Willie Walker,
Mrs. S. L. Nelson, Capt. J. M. Philpot, w. M. Myers,
Mrs. Mattie Medlock, B. A. Sullivan, j\ *Lee Langston,
Miss Yeargin, J. A. Austin, ,j' j Coleman
J J. Dunn, J. A. Franks, Mrs'. J. M. Hampton.
Mrs. j. W. Clark, Misb Agnes Boyd, ??? t ? . mii.m
Miss Corrinne Martin, Mrs. A S. Easterby, Ml*9 **Ac Mi,am'
Mrs.MaryGage D.A.Davis, J.T.Brown,
Miss Nannie Bramlett, T. D. Lake, Miss Irene Ray,
Messer Babb, T. Mack Roper, First Presbyterian
R. M. Hill, M. A. Summerei, Church S S
W. II. Drummond, T. B. Brown, M?vnr c M
.1. W. Oarrett, Mrs. J. Warren Bolt, iV r rw> '
T. F. Babb, j. W. A. Boyd, V* w' ?0' on
Dr. Beason, B. C. Burns, '; Y.' f L ? 1 '
oTSSJS?' WPH??r' w.p. C?land,
t?. (y..Hopkins. J. L. Hopkins, m-. i*.. n
T. J. Weathers, ? Mrs. Mattie Lindsay, gtvSed ScCln
Rev. E. C. Watson, S. J. Raior, C,ty Gpade<? Schools.
And others, besides many scores of organ purchasers which
will be mentioned at another time.
Write to him if you Want a Piano; it is to your interest.
L. A. McCORD,
The Piano Man.
April 22, 1908. LAURENS, S. C
Miss Tcrsleep?What keeps you here
Mr. Stoplate?Your glorious eyes.
Miss Tersleep- Well, they needn't
detain you. I can't keep 'em open
much longer. Cleveland Leader.
Mamma- Well, Edith, how did you
like the kindergarten?
Edith I didn't like it a bit. The
teacher put me on a chair and told me
to sit there for the present. I sat and
sat and she never gave me the present.
1 -Chicago News,
"Maud graduated from your cooking
school last spring, didn't, she?"
"Yes, but she's going to tako a post
graduate course next fall."
"Going back to the samo school
"Oh, no! She's to he married to a
pooryeung man."-Catholic Standard
Youth Sir, did a tall, fair blondo
pass this way?
Gatekeeper - No, hut a mighty pretty
little brunette did.
"And er which way did she go?