TWO DOLLARS PER ANNUM. <? GOD -A-ND OTJR COTJ3STTI?. Y". ALWAYS IN ADVANCE
VOLUME VI -SATURDAY MORNING, MAY 25, 1878. NUMBER 10
No. 12 N. Eighth St.
St. Louis, Mo.
Who hi* had Rreatrr cxperlenco In tho treatment of Oio
?axual troirblcM of both male nml female than any phyalcian
In the Wilt, givoa tho rvsult* of Iii? long and aucccsaful
practice In h?) twa now work*, just publlahed, entitled
Tho PHYSIOLOGY OF MARRIAGE
The PRIVATE MEDICAL ADVISER
Onoka that arts really Oaldra and rVIMmtrartoni In all mat
ter* pertaining to Hanhonil nnd Womanhood, nml aupply
want long felt. They aro b?AoUfollj lllutlratrd. nml in plain
baguage, caally umlrritooil. The two bonk* cmtirarcMS
pagrf, and contain raluabla information furlmlh mnrrhilnnil
single, with all tho recent improvciiicnta in medical tri-almi-nt
lt'-ad what our homopaneia lay :"Tlickno?'Ic<l(;i'lnipnrtnl
in Dr. Dnlta' new worki li In nu way of qiicatinuatilc char
acter, but la something that pT.ryona annultl know. The
Venia, tho victim of early tnili.erttion; tho Man.othrrwiao
prrftatly healthy maybe, out with wan"
of life, and the ITnnaji, in miaerii
from tho many Uta tier sex la bcfrl
to."?flt. Ixnila Journal. F
FOrtLAR PRICES ? GO cts. each;,
both tn one volume, 811 In cloth and)
flllt, 2i eta. extra. Sent umirr srnl, on]
?eeeipt of price In money or stamps.
apr'I 27 ly
THAN EVER BEFORE
AT Til K
FOREST CITY FOUNDRY
joj^U. i\. jlajMoaKU tV L.U.,
COTTON SCR FAN'S,
And Machinery off Kinds Made ami He
pa i red.
oct'27 1200: 52
That large nnd comniodiotin Ilrie.k Store,
formerly occupied by Mr, C. II. .Tone.'.
For terms apply to
MRS. M. E. MCNAMARA*
nnd SlnTttninn liahtl cured.
T'. QrlBlnulauaanh alMlliti
CIl.tN f. .1 .':uiii> f-r lirfc oa
Opium R?tlu< i ? \? It M.|iii.c,
Wurtlilust.u, (Srcsuu Co.. lud.
la tho rrtont pculal bMiinin evur usn) by
ititTerera from pulmonary dlioase^. Q
It 1h o.ompoHoil of horbul producta!, xvlitcti
tiavo a apnclfio effect nu tho thront nml
t"r;;iii llaataahaw; from tl>?- olr rutt* r.'l lr
rltituiic mutter: criUtinn it to bo expecto
rutotl, hiiiI atnnce ? lud;.; tho Intlrtmmntion
-which produce*) tho couirh. A a In trio duso
roHiiv(fi tho iiuiiit dlatrosslnif puroxrani
jiimth c: ri .1 -. vci u nu-r h . :m<t omioloa the litt
faror to ?mjoy nut et rent at night. ItoltiK a>
plattauut ?-orrilul. It tone? tin* wintVt Hloin
ssuh, nml 1? specially riuuiniiniii?cil for
W:*at others say about
'* TutVs Expectorant.
Had Asthma Thirty Yoars*
BaltIMOHe, Ftbruary 3. |3;<.
"I liaio had Asthma thirty years, nml neverluuutl
? tnodiclua lh.it bad surh :\ happv cflccl."
W. F. HOGAN, Chartas 8L
A Child's Idea of Merit.
New Oklkans, Ntrctml'tt'XX, 1S7S.
"Tutt'aKxpertuniiit is a familiar ti.iiiic in my hou.-e.
Wf wiletit in Vn it the beat medicine in llic world,
nnd the children mv it is 'nicer thin mnlaswe
caady."? NOAH WOODWARD, 101 U. Poydra* tit.
"Six. and all Croupy."
? I am Iba mother of six children ; all or them hnvo
booacrnupy. Without Tutt'u ISxpcrlnnuit, I don't
think; they could have survived home ol the attack*.
It is a mother's Messing-."
MARY STEVENS, Frankfort, Ky.
A Doctor's Advice.
"In my practice, I advise tall families to keep Tut t"?
P.arpcctnrant, in sudden emergencies, for coujU..,
coup, diphtheria, etc."
T. P. ELLIS, M.D., Nowark, N.J.
Bold 6j/ nil <lrug(iista. 1'rUe $I.OO. Ojjir*
3If Murray Street, Jfvte York.
"THE TREE IS KfjogH Bf ITS FRUIT."
?'Tint's Pills are worth their weicht in pold."
REV. I. R. SIMPSON, Louitvillo, K>
"Tutt's Pills are a special blearing of the nine
teenth century."?nEy. F. R. OSGOOD, New YorU.
"I have used Tutt's fills for torpor of the liver.
They are superior to any medicine tor biliary dis
orders ever made."
I. P. CARR, Attorney s;*, Law, Auguite, Ga.
" I have used Tutt's Pills rive years in my family.
They are unequaled fnrcortivenesa and biliousness.H
F. R. WILSON, Georgetown. Texas.
"I have used Tutt's AlcXeine with prent benefit.
W. W. MANNjEo^lor Mobile Rogistor.
"We aell fifty boxes Tint's PilU to fivr of all
ethers."?8AYRE & CO., Csrtertvillo, Ga.
"Tutt's Pills have only lo be tried to establish
their merits. They work like mapic."
W. H. BARRON, 96 Surnrner Si., Boston.
?' There is no medicine so well adapted to the cure
ef bilious disorders as Tutt's Pill?."
J08. BRUMMEL, Richmond, Virginia.
AND a THOUSAND MORE.
Bold by drttafltnta, 9R eentt a t>n.r. Offloc
?9(5 Murray Street, Hew Xorh.
TUTTS HAIR DYE
3 FROM TUR PACIFfC jnt'HA'.IL.
t . "a OREAT INVENTION ^
ha? lirrn iiiadu by int. TlITT, of New A nrk,
which restores voutbful beauty in the hnlr.
That eminent chemist has succeeded In
producing a Hair l)ve which Imitates
nature to perfection. Old havhelors may
now rejoice." Q "1
Price 3I.OO. Ofllefi 3K Murray St.,
New York. Sofa by alt druga'sts.
nrruntcri IlaniN only 124 et?
per lb. Sold by
[Kor the Orangeburg Times.]
Holmes Co., Miss., May 10th 1878.
Mr. Eihtor :
It was my pleasure to attend a meet
ing of the Centre Grove Grunge last
Saturday. The Grauge, hero is a
live institution. 'Twill bo hard to
h'ud a Grange containing more in
telligence in proportion to ihe num
ber ol membership. The meeting was
most harmonious, and 1 assure you,
Mr. Editor, no part of the exorcises
was enjoyed more than the din
ner. It was one of the be/t an 1 most
beautiful I ever saw. Who would
liot be a Granger.
Forest Glen Academy unfurled its
banner to ibo breeze hut Mou lay.
It opened with a good number of
Mrs. Mary El morn's school closed
on the 1st day of May. It was a gala
day to the students. In the afternoon,
1 hey held a May party, and Miss
Hall'io Megee was crowned Qitejn
O' the Muy. Miss Megee is a
graceful looking young lady, and
had the whole State been searched,
no better selection could have been
Miss Annie Covington, one of Ihe
lovelies!, most intelligent and pious
young ladioc in the county, died with
that fearful disease, consumption, last
Sunday afternoon. She is sadly
missed by a host of friends.
His Excellency, Gov. Stone, has
rendered himself immortal by pocket
ing an net passed by both houses of
the legislature, said act being passed
in accordance with a petition from
the G lungers of the State.
A very ludicrous scene was wit
nessed in Dunau a few nights ago.
A negro woman had/lied, and was
laid out on a table, her bead being
town it! the bide of the house, ami her
icet toward the centre of the room.
A iaige crowd huving assembled to I
tit up with the corpse, ibu floorguve
way, upsettiugthe table and precipi
tating the corpse, fbot forouiosh \
which frightened the watchers off.
Echoes from the Phonograph.
What Mrs. UarstinrlowHeard Alter Three
Days' Absence lroin 11 one.
It happened that Mrs. Bnrstinglow
was going down to Keokuk for a few
days, mid Mr. Bnrstinglow wasiucon- ,
soluble. At one time he protested
that she should not go; he could not
endure the lonesome bouse during her
absence. Ami then again he declared
that if she must go, he would ueglect
his office and let his business go to
the bow-wows, and ho would go with
her. At length, however, sho per
suaded him to be reasonable, and on
her repeated assurance that she woul d
not remain away longer than three
days, he consented to let her go. He
even bought her ticket, and ordered
the carriage and paid for it two days
ahead, lest his resolution should give
way, and he should forget her going
from him. Ami from that time till
the morning of - her depnrturo, Mr.
Bnrstinglow spoke in subdued tones
and moved about with theairjofa
man whose heart was jburied under
mountains of grief. Before she left
the house, Mrs. Bnrstinglow set the
phonograph in the sitting room, bo
hind the clock. Then she kissed he r
disconsolate husband,and begged him
to preserve his precious life for her
sake while ehe was away, nud then
she wns gone.
Every dny during her throe dnys'
visit in the Gntc City she received a
letter from her mourning husband,
bigging her to como bad; and telling
lid how lonesome he was without her,
and how like a grave theemptj houso
seemed, nnd how the hours drngged
over his aching heart with lendeu
feet. Aud in threo days she enmo
home, and filled the solemn house
with sunlight and laughter ftgain?
Tho evening after her return to Bur
lington, she took down tho phono
"I wonder," sho said, "what we said
last in its hearing? It must have
been something while wo were dis
cussing my visit. Or may be it has
caught 6omo of your poor, longi ng
monnings while I was away."
And then she turned the crank.
"Lord, no," croaked tho phono
graph, in tones of hearty rea-nu ranee;
"no danger of that; she's safe in
Keokuk for three days; saw her safe
ly oft' myself this morning. Light
your cigar while 1 light another
lamp and make the loom look cheer
"Why," exclaimed Mrs. Barstiag
low, in a countenance of amazement,
"what on earth is it saying ?"
"Oh, some nonsense, some of your
visitors have talked into it some lime
or other," replied her hunshaud,
nervously, "people talk all kinds of
stuff into a phonograph, you know.
They say anything for talk."
Mrs, Bnrstinglow, looking only
half convinced, gave the crank
'This is devilish good whisky,
Barsty, ' ejaculated the machine,
very earnestly. "Von don't get it in
Burlingtou, do you?"
Mrs. Barstiuglow gave a little
"My d(ar," said her hunsband,
looking now quite as worried as he
had looked when he was begging her
not to go to Keokuk, "put it away,
somebody has had it out in the stable,
and it might say something perfectly
shocking, you know. Do put it
But Mrs. Barstiuglow, upon whom
the spirit of investigation had decend
ed with great power, ground away,
and the phonograph, in a voice raar
velously like her husband's went re
"Not much; they don't make this
kind now, Its some old Mononga
hela, copper-distilled that Mrs. Bars
tinglow's mother gave her for medi
cal purposes three years ago. Fill
up again, there's plenty of it, and I
can replace it with any kind of bevor
ago when it's gone. Tim old ^irl
w. n't Un ? w li.e .?in:- " .
Mrs. Barstiuglow felt herself turn
ing to stone, out the next tarn uftli s
crank brought out an uproprio it.
''Ha, ha, ha] Here's to the o. g 1"
That funned her cheeks into , a
"ior mercy's lake, Ma lach i Bars
tiuglow," she shrieked, "whatdoes
this mean ?*'
Mr, Bnrstinglow now 1 oked as
though he ready did wish she had
never gone to Keokuk.
"It's just as I tell you," he said,
with *au effort to look unconcerned,
that was like a humorous book, a !
colossal success, so far as its complete
failure was concerned. "Somebody
has beeu talking all sorts of nonsense
into it just for talk's sake. How else
could it get hold of snob dreadful stu <f
in ourdcar little home, lovey?"
Mrs. Barstiuglow didn't know, hu t
she turned away and the phono raph
nske 1 carelessly :
"Throw around for the deds."
She thought she would faint, but
she didn't, and the pitihss machine
proceeded to remark, with a variety
"Its my age."
"You'll have to straddle that blind
if you come in.''
"I'll see your little one a id raise
you a couple."
"Bush tho bottle this way, Ben."
"Ain't you going to stay in. Harr ?"
"Can't stay in on a pair of sixes."
"Two small pair, hings to head."
"Tens and donees. Take the pot."
"Bnrtsy, get us something to cat.
Old girl left the cupboard k ys, didn't
"Lord, yes; told her I was going to
keep bach at home to save expenses
nud keep out of bad company."
"Hn.hn, hn!! Ho! ho!! ho!!!"
"Oh," yelled Mr. Barstiuglow, un
able to contain himself any longer,
while his wife, more dend than alive,
leaned over tho phonograph and
ground away at the crank in a dnzed
kind of a way. Oh, keep it up! That's
right! Keep her agoing! Grind it
all outl Dog gone the diabolical
piece of black nrt and the vile assas
sin that invented it! Keep it up 1
That's right! Believe a senseless,
diabolical piece of monstrous mech
anism rather than your husband.
Keep her agoing. Keep it tip!"
Aud Mm. Barstinglow did keep it
up. She kept it up, ami ii.sto.ied to
that phonograph swear am. b'houtaud
howl; sho heard it shriek, "Oh, my
eye; my dye I4' she heard it toll some
one to let some one cl*e "have it
again in the same place;" she heard
tt warn somebody to "hold his head
over the stove-hearth, and not let his
uose bleed on the carpet," and at last,
as it assured her very thickly and
with some dilKoulty that it was "a
ban' ofjorry gooffuf-fuf fellows" and
that "won'-lne-won' g' ometill morn
ing," she ground it into silence, and
sank back, speechless and breathless,
while Mr. Barstinglow look the
phonograph out into the back yard
and smashed it into so in my and siie'i
small fragments that. it. couldn't re
produce even a steamboat whistle.
'?'Now, then, I guess you won't tel!
on me any more, you old blabber."
A Model Conductor. *
? " TT- . ?
?I left Mary villc and went South on
a*rnilroad so full of initials that it
soiiuded like a Masonic Lodge, and I
wondered how they kept the train on
the track. But .there was a conduc
tor on the traiu who deserves a
monument. He didn't stand around
and let his passengers hunt seats for
themselves. When be came iuto the
car and saw one man with no seat
and another man with four he gently
but firmly bounced the expansive
man and made him withdraw within
the metes and bouuds described by his
ticket. He wasn't ugly or cross about
it, but he had a way of explaining to
a man with one ticket aud tbres
valises, an egg ease, a box of butter,
a bird cage, two hat boxes aud a
-,ket ofapplos, that the exi re3s car
:.- j^tuwo1 wiTfl forward; that, was per
fectly irresistible, A small, timid
passenger un accustomed to traveling
is very averse to ordering a big,
burly, broad-shouldered- traveler,
with a belligerent, repel laut express
ion on bis sleeps face, to "wake up
and give him a seat," and the con
ductor who takes this job off his
timid bunds is a Godsend to the
traveling community. The man who
ran North on the K. C, St. J. and C.
B. last Monday afternoon would bo
an honor to a road with even twice so
?- mm mm -
A Good Ono on Oapt. McAdiii.
He Pushed the Fat Lady!
A passenger on the Spartanburg
and Union Railroad train last night,
?tibi us a ''good one" on Capt. B.
M'Adin the popular conductor of
that road, which occurred dur ng the
rush, n week or two ago. The Cap
tain was on the grand rounds for
tickets! and uftcr gobbling up a num
ber of dead heads, he came to a very
large and talkative lady, who was
very polite, and while almost gasping
for breath, she told the gallant Cap
tain that she had not bad time to buy
a ticket, but she bad the money. She
was crowded iuto a seat with another
portly lady, and could not move
about very handily, ami asked the
Captain to reach down and get the
money out of her stocking! saying
that there were a great many thieves
about, and she wished to be very
careful with her fuuds. Captain
McAdin quietly remarked that the
railroad didn't charge old ladies, and
he toddled oil'after other tickets, the
crowd near grinning at his expense.
? Speights* Daily Ni lospdjh r.
One hundred and fifty superfluous
women shipped from New York to
Oregon on speculation, wore seized
and married immediately on arrival.
There are 150,000 bachelors in Ore
gon who want to marry.
The largest bronze statue in the
world is at Nara, Japan. It weighs
over 450 tons, and a man can climb
through one of its nostrils.
A Treasury Lady the Victim of
A Washington correspondent snys :
One of those ingenious women whose
business it is to examine mutilated
nnd illegible currency in the Treasu
ry 1ms recently come to griof. Thie
woman had so ably performed this
intricate work for several yoars as to
have become almost indispensable
not only to tho department, but
scarcely less ho to numerous banks in
different parts of the country, who
but fur her patience must have lost
considerable sums in worn curroncy.
Her skill in restoring what looked
like a hopeless mass was marvelous,
and in consideration of her persever
ance in this direction, some of the
banks have from time to time attest
ed their appreciation of the material
benefit thus derived, by handsome
donations of money, one or two, it is
understood, paying her as high as
SI ,000 per year. I take equal pride
in the gal lau try of such men and the
ability of such a women. Too often
are women compelled to feel that
they gain nothing by tnaked fidelity.
These gills from the banks were, of
course, in addition to the tegular
salary paid by the treasury, of 81,200.
For a considerable time it was sadly
noticed that this woman was mani
festly falling into the insidous power
of a terrible syren. Often and again,
it could not be denied, she was not
quite herself long before the hour for
the close of work. Admonitions,
kind and gentle, and warnings, oft
repeated, were of no avail. She was
hopelessly enthralled. At last she
came to the office one morning ul
ready too oblivious to faithfully per
form her usual task,and, as patience
had long since ceased to be a virtue,
a carriage was called and she was
sent, a victim of alcohjl, to her homo,
there to find that ominous yellow
envelope containing a notice of dis
missal from service had preceded her
coming. Sstrange to say, her prede
cessor in the same position, who had
served long and acceptably, but for
this weakness, was discharged for tho
A Correspondent Answered.
"Mabel Clare" writes us the follow
ing flattering inquiry : "Are you the
author ot that tender little ballad,
'Parting, Kiss My Eyelids Dowu !"
We? Wo write such stuft as that?
"Kiss our eyelids down ?" Mabel,
thou art beside thyself; much reading
hath made thee mad. "Darling, kiss
our eyelids down." Now isn't that a
nice thing to accuse us of saying?
Aro wo that devoid of intelligence ?
Mabel, don't you trouble our eyelids
when you hnva a fancy to perform
any operations of that delicate an d
tender nature. We have a large,
comfortable, roomy, flexible gash
just below our noso that has bought
county rights for all business of that
na ure that comes within the limits
of our face, and any eyelid found
intcring or infringing will bo prose
cuted to tho extreme limitof the law.
No, wo didn't write it.?Burlington
Poker-players should be more
guarded in their expressions. A
player at Omaha lately "made use of
a phrase such as this: 'I hope Christ
will kill me if it isn't so !' Pie had
dealt the hand himself, and as the
betting was over, he passed the cards
to the player on his left, who shuffled
them and then asked him to cut them,
giving him a light tap to attract his
attention. The blasphemous player
did not stir. Ho was dead."
"I-rcarn to smile," urges a cotem
porary. That is pretty advice for an
editor to give whoso task it is to
mould public opinion. 'Young men
learn to "smile" soon cuougli without
any newspaper instructions on the
subject. It is suspected that tho
editor owns an interest in a largo
Of all kinds of property, nionoy
lent on good security is the most
Finding His Ideal.
The last case of manifest destiny is
reported from the city oi* Evausvillo,
Ind. A physician soon after loading
his bride to the alter, wrote a letter
to a college friend in Northern Geor
gia, informing him of what bad hap
pened, and advising him, alter the
manner of a bridegroom, to go aud do
likewise. The rising young lawyer
replied from Newman, Ga., that ho
would be very happy to marry if he
could only meet h;s ideal; and then
followed a peu picture ot the woman
for whom his soul languished, all the
mental and physical charms which
found a place in his appreciation be
ing duly mentioned in the descrip
tion. While passing along Mam
street one day months afterwar 1, the
physician happened to sec a young
lady of exquisite beamy and rare
intelligence, and like *a flash ha re
cognized her as the embodiment of
the lawyer's dream. Ho mad-; in
quiries] at once and learned that sha
lived in Kentucky, and was visiting
some friends in Ev ? nsville; and sub
sequently he procured, without h it*
knowledge, one. of her photographs
and sent it to the promising young
lawyer. This gentleman was pleased
with the counterfeit presentment, and
acknowledped by the next mail, that
it was indeed the face of his ideal.
Subsequently, be paid a visit to her
father's house in Owens bo ro, aud pre
sented letters of introduction fro m
Messrs. Stephensand Hill; and after
a short courtship dostiuy had her
way, the marriage ceremony being
performed in the Baptist church of
A Wyoming man won ten dollars
on a wager by eating twenty pigs'
feet. This was a pig's feet, indeed.
Wh?n a woman, hqtfever gentle at
home/ goes to market, she's pretty
sure toTmve her own woig!
Mrs.. Jane Higg'os. Shn*ivydU"r
Ind., has attained fame by cow hiding
When docs a farmer act with great
rudeness toward his corn ? Wi.en he
pul's its ears.
The monkeys are not so ignorant,
after all. They were all educated in
the high branches.
A volume that is apt to bring tears
to anybody's eyes?a volume of
The consumption of pencils in this
country is at the rate of about 250,
000 a day.
Russia aud Turkey are now lying
down peacefully together like the fox
and the goose?only the goose is iuside
of the fox.
Still water has no current at all.?
New Orleans Picayune. Still, water
has a current sometimes.?New York
A Nevada politician was elected on
the merits of one single speech. All
he said was: "Fellow countrymen
follow me to yonder saloon."
Hotel guest on retiring?"I want
to get up at eight o'clock." Face
tious night clerk?"Have notgotouo,
sir." Guest,"Not got what?" Clork,
"A potato clock."
A young lady who wanted a new
pull back, hearing that gold was
dowu to 'Pa,' was almost broken
hearted on being told by him that- ho
was unable, nevertheless, to pay for
Edith Morgan was one of a crew
that went out in a small rowboat in a
recent terrible storm on Lako Michi
gan, at tho peril of their lives, and
rescued a drowning sailor from a
- mmv. - ? ??
There is scarcely any character so
rare as a man of real open aud geuer
ous integrity, who carries his heart
in his hand, who says tho thing ho
pretends. Though no one cau dis
like the character, yet discretion
generally shakes her head, and tho
word soon Ids him into tho reason,
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