Newspaper Page Text
CROUP QUICKLY CURED.
Mountain Glen. Ark.?Our children
were suffering with croup when we re?
ceived a bottle of Chainberlaln'8 Cough
Remedy. It alfonled almost instant re?
lief.? fc\ A. Thornton. This celebrated
remedy la for sale by U. C. Barnes. "He
puts up prescriptions." ~,z ? J
One Cent a Word Each Insertion.
WANTED.?A man to travel and col?
lect on installment accounts. Must bo
single and give bond. Small salary for
tho first three months. Address with
references and slate past experience.
GAT ELI' & FITZGERALD,
9 20 53t Box 464, Ruauoke. V?.
WANTED?To sell a Hoe Jersey cow,
registered stock, also to buy a good f ret h
cow. D. LA.MKIN, 219 Sa'em avenue.
FOR SALE?A very fine Kranich &
Bach piano, as good as now, for sale at a
sacrifice for cash. Call at. 359 Campbell
avenue s. w. 10T-lw.
FINE Black Minorca Cockerels 'for
sale *:t a bargain If taken at once. 515
Sevent h avenue s. w. 0 2H lw
WANTED?A position as school
teacher either in private family or public
school by a young lady irho is a g'aduute
of tho Danville, blub school, also has
teacher's certificate from Superlnfndont
F. B. Watson, Chatham, Va.ican also
leach music. Address B, 120 and '-"-J
Union street, Danville, va. 0 -.>?.%?
WANTED?Salesman to sell special bar?
gains In blankebS in toe Valley of Vir?
ginia by sample. For particulars as to
?uencies address STANDARD INSTALL?
MENT CO., 212 South Jefferson street.
NOTIOE or MERTING.
ROANOKE, Va., Sept. 28th, 1897.?
There will be a meeting of the stockhold?
ers o' the Roauoke Electric Light and
Power Company on SATURDAY, OC?
TOBER ?th, 1S117, at 10:30 o'clock a. in.,
in the ollice of the secretary, Roauoke,
Va., for the election of a board of direc?
tors and officers, and such other business
as may be brought before the meeting.
CEO. C. M'CAHAN,
BOANOKK. Va., Sept. 2Sth. 1SD7.?
There wiU be a meeting of the stockhold?
ers of the Roauoke Street Railway Com?
pany on SATURDAY, October ! th. 1H1I7,
at 10 o'clock a. m., In tho office of the
secretary, at ftoanoke, Va., lor the pur?
pose of the election of a board of direc?
tors and officers, and such other business
as ntay be bionght before the meeting.
GF.O. C. M'CAHAN,
NOTICE.?The. annual stockholders'
meeting of tho Virginia Industrial Acci?
dent Association will be hold on Wednes?
day, October 13, 1W.I7, at 2:80 p. m. at the
ollice of tho secretary, Masonic Temple,
W. C. STEPHEN SON, Secretary.
NORFOLK AND WESTERN RAIL?
WAY COMPANY?Thr annual meeting
of tho stockholders of the Norfolk and
Western Railway Company will be held
at tho principle ollice of the company in
the eitv of Rcanoke, Virginia, on
THURSDAY, THE I4TH DAY OF
OCTOBER, 1HII7, at 12 o'clock noon, for
the consideration of the annual report,
the election of directors, and the transac?
tion of such ether business as may prop?
erly conic before the meeting for action,
including the election of Independent
auditors to audit books Mid accounts of
the company at the close of the fiscal
year. The stock transfer books will he
closed at the ( lose of business on Satur?
day, September 25th, 1.SHT. and reopened
at 10 o'clock a. m.. Monday, October
a. J. IIEMPHILL,
Roauoke, Va., September 1, IS',17.
For Sale by All Druggists.
" GREAT GUNS."
Why he without a gun, when FAIR?
FAX BROS, anticipated your wants
ahead, and had imported a large stock of
(Bins, before the new tariff went into ef?
fect, which are arriving daily.
Call uuil see them.
Sales for one day last week: 4 Double
Barrel Breech-Loaders, 2 Single-Barrel
Breecb-Loaders. We have prices that
make business. Yours to please,
The Hardware Hustlers, Roauoke, Va.
FIGHTS AMONG TABS.
SAILORS OF THE NAVY EVER READY
WITH THEIR FISTS.
Tho Unavoidable Causes of Friction?Sim
plo Things Start the Quarrels,.and Then
They Must ISo Settled?llrulsed Com?
batants "Fell Down a Ladder."
Tho regulat ion against fighting is per?
haps tho deadest of all naval regula
t ions. It is impossible of enforcement
If it wero enforced to tho letter, pretty
nearly all hands among tho mcu for?
ward would bo in tho "brig" from one
year's end to tho other. Fighting is
practically a necessary evil among men
who wear their country's uniform for
a livelihood Officers of experience
blink at it. They know tho bad, con?
taminating results of bitterness between
a pair of bluejackets under tho forecas?
tle. They have learned that it is better
tho thing should bo fought out mid done
with than that dozens of men should bo
(brawn into a quarrel that festers and
grows unless tho head of it is broken
by a decisive battlo between the t wo men
who have been snarling at each other.
People who havo mndo ocean voyages
often dwell upon tho weariness which
has overcome them at tho sight of their
fellow voyagers' countenances toward
the end of a passage. This is a feeding
which is aggravated a thousandfold
amid tho uncouifortablosurroundings of
a war vessel's forecastle, the hundreds
of occupants of which arc obliged to bo
constantly together for from ono to
three years. Euch man becomes thor?
oughly awaro of all Iiis mates' littlo
characteristics, and after awhile, wheth?
er these characteristics are good or bad,
they jar upon him, if only on account
of their monotony. Thus friction is gen?
erated, and it is for this reason that tho
crew of si man-of-war just returned to
tho United Statestifter a threo years'
cruise in foreign waters is generally
such a sour looking lot, oven as concerns
tho olllcers aft, who become quito as
sick of each other as do tho men for?
Hardly a day passes that there is not
at least one scrap on board most men
of-war, with tho promise of a heavier
battle to follow. A bluejacket seats
himself on another's ditty box, and, on
being roughly ordered by tho box's
owner to vacate, ho refuses and con?
signs tho owner to a much less moist
place than Davy Jones' locker. Tho
men COUlO together, two or three blows
nro exchanged, and then, as by common
consent, each man draws away, both
feeling that tho "jimmy legs" (i. c,
tho master at arms) is not far distant
and neither caring for a trick in tho
"brig." Having thus become involved
in the minor fistic argument of tho
dock, tho two bluejackets arc looked to
by the entire ship's company to bring
their affair to a satisfactory conclusion.
The mere exchange of growls between
tho two men doesn't go. "Pipe down
there, yo men-of-war chaws, iukI settlo
tho thing right," is tho general remark
hurled at them by all hands when they
meet in mere contests of cuss words,
and tho sailor who is considered to bo
tho aggrieved man is watched carefully
to sco if ho makes any preliminary
moves toward arranging a regular light.
Ho almost always does.
Nearly all tho regular fights between
bluejackets aboard ship are pulled off
down below in ono of the firerooms or
in mi empty bunker. Tho empty bunker
is preferred on account of its greater
isolation. When a fight is to come off
between two bluejackets below, all
hands know all about, it, often includ?
ing tho master at arms himself, but
very few of tho men, unless they uro
intimates of the combatants, expect in?
vitations to tho fray. There is not room
in a bunker for nioro than half a dozen
friends of each man, and even with this
number tho space is rather contracted.
With a second each and it referee
agreed upon by both, tho men, stripped
naked to tho waist, go at it. The fights
arc not of tho rough and tumble order.
Tho men light according to regular
prize ring rules, and their shipmates
uro present to sco that the rules are
complied with. As many as 50 rounds
uro sometimes fought. Ordinarily ono
of tho men goes under by the time tho
tenth round is called. If tho men aro
unequally matched and ono of them is
getting palpably tho worst of it, till
hands in the bunker agree that tho
thing should stop, and it does stop. If
tlio contestants aro about of a sort, tho
light is carried on to tho end, until a
knockout blow is planted by ono of
j them or both nro too weak to goon.
At tho conclusion of tho fight tho ou
j lookers quietly depart from tho bunker
j und ascend to tho deck by different en
gino room ladders, so ns not to attract
the attention of tho officer of tho deck.
Both men generally got pretty thor?
oughly mauled and bruised up in theso
bunker fights, and when tho battlo is
over they jump into their uniforms and
repair to tho sick bay to get themselves
patched up with arnica, court plaster,
etc Tho surgeon knows at a glance
what ails them, but for tho sake of
form ho asks them what tho trouble is.
They havo both fallen down a bidder.
Both at tho same time? No, sir; they
fell down different ladders. "That's cu?
rious I" murmurs the surgeon, with a
sinilo and n faraway look in his eyes,
scribbling an account of their injuries
in Iiis record, and then ho orders the
apothecary to dress their wounds.?
"Grandpa, how old aro you?"
"1 am 8? years old, my dear."
"Thou you were born 80 years before
I waa What a long time you had alone
waiting for me!"?Philadelphia Times.
That army chaplaincies continue tr
be very alluring to tho clerical mind it
indicated by tho fact that nearly 80C
ministers applied to tho federal govern?
ment for appointment to a single va?
cancy that recently occurred.
WE ARE ASSERTING IN THE
EXCLUSIVE USE OF THE NY
X, dr. samuel pitcher
Wdii the originator of " p1tc
tkai has borne and (loc3 r.o:v
bear ~ihc facsimile signature of
Ulis is the original " pitcher
useu. in, the homes of the Moth
yeai look carefully ai
the hind yon have olwai/s bougi
ana has tlie signature* (
per. No one has authority f
ce-if, The Centaur Company oj
March S, 1S07.
Do Hot Be
Dg? not endanger the life
a cheap substitute which so
(because he makes a few 1
gradients of which ever; L
"The Kind Yon Ha
BEARS THE FAC-SI P.
The Kind That ?
THE CtNTAUn COMPANY. TT Mil
SHORT NEWS STORIES.
A Flask In Hip Wooden Lofr?A Martyr
to MelonB?Never Touched Him.
Nansen on tho Platform.
" Occasionally somo fnnny things
happen at tho Soldiers' homo in Au?
gusta, Me., whero I hail from, hut tho
funniest of all is tho one that I am go?
ing to toll you about. It happened just,
before I canio on to tho encampment,''
Raid William Harris, nn inmate of the
? home, who is visiting in Buffalo.
I "Whisky is on tho blacklist at tho
i home, and all sorts of schemes aro re?
sorted to to obtain it, but thoy aro dis?
covered sooner or later and can uover bo
tried again. There is an old fellow with
a wooden leg at tho home, and his
namo is Wheeler. Ho had a scheme for
getting whisky that baffled all tho offi?
cers who were watching him, and it
worked so well that, although Wheeler
wa? drimk nearly all tho time, his plun
was not discovered until last week.
"Tho old fellow carved a holo in his
wooden leg big enough to hold a flask
of whisky, and whenever ho wanted to
get drimk ho would got his flask filled
somewhere and put it in his leg, go off
somewhere by himself and get glorioua
j ly full right in tho homo. After the
! officers of tho institution had uselessly
accused every saloon keeper within a
I mile (if the place of selling whisky to
Wheeler thoy decided to keep a close
watch on him. So the next time he dis?
appeared they searched for him until
they found him lying dead drunk in n
graveyard, with his wooden log un?
strapped and the empty llask iu tho hole
in tho leg. That ended his game, aud
ho will never got drunk that way again.
If ho does, Iiis wooden leg will bo taken
from him and hoTl havo to stay at
homo. "?Buffalo Express.
A Martyr to Melons.
Tho melon crop was short this year,
nnd a southwest Georgia fanner who
had practically "cornered" it in his
neighborhood had suffered seriously
j from the depredations of some of the
hungry colored brethren. So ho gave it
out that ho had poisoned his melons,
and after the news went forth ho ceased
to miss them.
Night after night nn old negro who
lived near tho finest melon patch had
gazed at their green sides with hungry
eyes, but tho thought of the poison kept
him hungry still.
One moonlight night, however, his
appetite got the best of him. He looked
] in the direction of tho melons long and
earnestly; then, shouldering' a sack, he
"In do namo or goodness, Rnfus,
whar you gwine?" asked his wife.
Tho old man turned, pointed to the
melon patch and said, slowly and sol
"I'm n-gwino whar dem melons is!"
"I know doy is! But I'm gwine tor
take my death. Pray fer me!"?Atlau
I ta Constitution.
Never Touched Him.
At the battle of Chicknmanga a fel?
low named R- was Been shooting
' sti^aight up iu the air and praying as
lustily as ever ono of Cromwell's round?
heads prayed. The Presbyterians of
1640 prayed loud and song hymn.-; in
battle, but they shot straight at tho
cavaliers every time. This fellow was
blazing away at the sky, and when
Lieutenant Killingworth remonstrated
with him about it ho paid no attention
to him whatever. Captain Joe BilliiiL'
loy threatened to cut him down with
his sword if ho didn't shoot at the
enemy, for the woods in front wore full
of them. Ho merely remarked to the
captain, "You can kill mo if you want
to, but I am not going to appear before
my God with tho blood of my fellow
man on my soul.''
Ho never flinched, but stood squarely
up, exposed to every volley of tho en?
emy's lire. When tho sun set on the
COURTS OL K RIGHT TO THE
ORD '* CASTORIA," AND
IA," AS OLiK TRADE MARK.
, of Byannis. Massachusetts,
rlER'S CASTORIA," the same
S CASTORIA,'' which has been
ers of America for over thirty
; the wrapper and see that it is
it ^-? on the
vni me to use my name ex
' which Chas. H. Fletcher is
of your child by accepting
me druggist may offer you
norc pennies on it), the in
?c docs not know.
7G Always Bought"
1ILE SIGNATURE OF
Fever Failed You.
HHAV SYflCCT. KEW VOItH CITf.
evening of Sept. 1*, isn:i, Captain J.
C. Billingslcy and Lieutenant Allen
Killingworth both lay dead on tho bat?
tlefield of ('hickainaugn :uid R-went
throagh without a scratch.?Galvestou
"After Many Days."
Every now and then something turns
up to shake tho belief that the man who
borrows spends tho rest of his life in
trying to avoid payment. Ono day re
oently the widow of a gentleman who
was ono of tho best known and most
highly regarded citizens of Washington
was informed that a visitor wished to
see her. Being ill, she sent hot grand?
daughter to see the caller.
"Your grandfather," said the caller
to the young lady, "loaned mo $18 a
long time ago, when I nsod to work up
at the eapitol, and I want to pay it to
his widow. My name? Oh, novor mind
about that; you wouldn't know it if you
heard it. Hero's the $18. I don't want
any receipt; ho never asked mo for n
receipt. Hero's the money. Goodby."
And away went the honest unknown.
Nanson on tho Platform.
"When in London, some months ago,
I had the pleasure of hearing Nansen,
tho great arctic explorer, lecture," said
a returned traveler the other day. "Tho
cost of admission was rather high, s?,
but it was well worth tho price to hear
his vivid descriptions Ho speaks with
tin English accent, but very clearly und
correctly. One of tho most pathetic
things be told about was tho killing of
his pet dogs for food. Ho hadn't tho
heart to commit tho deed and delegated
it to others. The clothing worn by Nan
sen and his party was on exhibition for
scitne weeks in London. ' I imagine that
the same sort of garments aro in lash
ion in the Klondike for tho larger part
of tho year. When once put on, they
aro not removed for months."?New
Between Old VrtendB.
Mrs. Hautton (maliciously)?You
wero such it charming debutante, my
dear, 15 years ago.
Mrs. Inglofo?Was I? I only remem?
ber you made such a lovely chaperon
for mo when I came out.?Tit-Pits.
Cleanliness and OodlinflM.
('unite?Yes. sinners shall bo washed
white us snow.
Granny?But not them as truly re?
pents, 1 'ope, sir.?Pick Mo Up
Gone ltejond Iteoall.
Mistress?Are you going to get dinner
, on the gasoline stove, Bridget?
Bridget ? Vis. mum, but it wint out.
Mistress?Well, why don't you light
Bridget?Shnre, mum, it hasn't cotno
back yit. It wint out t'rOOgh the roof.
* ?Un to Date. _
"Ethel, what aro yon doing with that
"I'm looking through tho B's, grand?
ma, to sco if there is anything in the
Bible about bieyclo riding on Sunduy
being wrong. "?Chicago Tribune.
AFTER THE ACCIDENT.
An Idyl of Chicago Written by the other
Wo knelt above him as bo lay to catch his dy?
His breath was scarce a illuker and hi3 heart
now barely stirred.
Tho ninn from Johnson's morguo remarked,
"I nm a Jonah if
I ever waited half as loug for such a stubborn
Tho lamplight Ml upon tho form so pitilessly
And every ovo was moist with tears and every
voice was hushed,
When from the hallway camo these words, "1
want to warn you folks
I have a writ to claim thu corpse when this
here party crooks."
Outside tin darkness druped tho town, mid?
night wan on tho world,
And nil was ijuiet whoro intense activity had
Tho only itound that roso waa of tho footsteps
ol at least
A dozen otli. i ts on watch to grab tho lute do
tho olerla gavo the sacrament and softly
breathed a prayer,
Tho weeping mother's quaking hand caressed
the crimsoned hair,
Tho young wife rained fond kisses on tho poor,
gashed, bandaged face.
And tho coroner's assistant cried, "Ho goes to
Harper's place I"
"lie's dead," tho doctor murmured, and wo
echoed back, "Ilo's dead."
Oh, what two words aro there, my friend,
whose import is so dread?
1 whispered them qulto softly, then 1 cried
with all my might,
"Now let my constables lino up, nil ready tor
tho lin?t I"
And then, good fellow citizens, you should
have seen the row.
It thrills my very heart and soul to think
about it now.
Tor my own part, 1 broke two ribs in manner
sin k and neat
Of that raw, cofllll peddling jay whoso shop's
across tho streut.
And constables and deputies and undertakers,
And coroners nnd mourners and police In
clothes of 1 luo
Fought III ferocious fashion, bloody nosed and
And rallied with tierce upper cuts arbund the
man who died.
The rndly stricken father of tho man BO newly
Went rolling down tho stairway, whero he
lauded on his head.
The coroner swung u knockout on the mild
and gentle priest,
While 1 went through tho window with the
sash and thu deceased.
Ah, me, it is a dreadful thing, this episode ct
When anxious hearted people hang upon each
Watching in most extreme suspense while lifo
is taking wings.
Each wondering who'll "got tho corpse" and
sell tho shroud and things.
?Tho Other Undertaker in Chicago Record
An Explanatory Hint.
"Why," asked Put as ho camo nie?
coughing into tho Quippery, "is tho
humble goat always held npns tho sim
ilo for intoxication?for instance, 'full
as a gout?' "
"I cannot pucss," answered Tim,
"unless"?and lie paused meditatively
and looked at Pat as if ho expected an
invitation?"unless it is because bo is
always ready to throw a horn into any?
HUMOR OF THE HOUR.
A colored Mrs. Partington lives in
Georgia, uud she talks interestingly.
Sho is about 70 years old and makes
a great show of reading the Bible,
though it is well known she cunnot read
The other morning sho was seated on
her front porch with a largo family
Biblo open ou her lap.
Some ouo was parsing and saluted
"Good morning. Aunt Caroline."
"Mawnin, sub, iuawniu! It's right
previous woather, sub."
"Yes, rather previous."
"De clouds bang so low hit look liko
dey 'bout ter huvo a collegienco wid do
"Yes, it docs look so."
"Well, de Lawd'll take keer on us.
Do Biblo say lie distompers do wiud ter
do boru lambs."
"Is that the Bible you're reading?"
"Oh, yes, sub!"
"Why, it's upsido down!"
"Look heah, mister," said tho old
woman indignantly, "don't you s'poso
I kuowed it? Whatdiffunco do it make?
Do Bible is so plain you kin des read
it any way!"?Atlanta Constitution.
An Effective Remedy.
"Gentlemen," said tho genial in?
structor in first aid to tho injured, "by
this time, I trust, you aro all familiar
with the general rules to bo followed in
emergencies. I shall now proceed to il?
lustrate their practical application by
giving each of y?n au iruagiuary case
"I shall begin with you, sir," he
continued, beaming upon au earnest
young man in thodrtmt row. "Assumo
that yott have taken a young lady out
for a walk. Tho night is warm. After
dispatching, let us say, five plates of
ico cream your companion suddenly
turns palo and becomes insensible. In
other words, sho faints. What would
yon do in such a ease?"
Every eve was lixed upon the student.
But he arose to tho occasion and re?
"Shako her."?Xcv York Sunday
Ho Was Hash Indeed.
"You?you will uot do anything
rash, Mr. Haralong, will you?" ex?
claimed tho young womuu in a trem?
Tho rejected lover, palo but resolute,
rose slowly to his feet.
"Henrietta Pluuket," bo answered
through bis sot teeth, "I will. Just as
surely as yon stand there, proud, heart?
less beauty that you uro, I shall be in
tho south sen islands six months from,
now, the happy husband of H wives.
"Tho wife," said the ancient philos?
opher, after looking over his shoulder
furtively, "is less than tho husband.
For instance, my wifo is a tease, aud I
am a Soerales. "?Indiuunonli? Journal.
needs Pearline. Almost as
much as it needs an ice-box.
Look at the general greasiness
and nastincss around some
butcher shops. It isn't that
they're less particular there, prob?
ably. They're doing the best
they can. But they don't use
Pearline?and there are some things that must have Pearl?
ine to keep properly clean, and among these things are
meat markets, butcher shops. rco
We havrt been doing business in Roanoke all the time, through
booms and panics, and are still here giving our customers perfect
satisfaction. We handle only the b^st, and after a full trial and a
full investigation we believe /ETNA L?THI'<. WATfcve isthebest
water offered tothe public. We therefore sell and deliver it at 10
c nts pur gallon, and guarantee relief in c <ses of Dyspepsia, Kid?
ney, Liverand Stomach Troubles, Uric Acid in Blood, Rheuma?
tism and Menstrual Irregularities in any form, or refund the mon?
ey Wa mean what we say. To any one who has not trind the wa?
ter, we will send one gallon fres Call and read testimonials.
s Sept. Qt>^._
One of the Leading Schools ?I the South.
Superior advantages tn All departments. A full corps of European And American
teachers specially prepared for' their respective positions. Magnificent moun?
tain scenery. College located in the Valley of Virginia, famed for health. The
Sciences and Ancient Languages taught by an A. B. of Princeton and Harvard
Universities; English by an Honor graduate of Vassal; French and German by
a teacher of European advantages; Instrumental Music by skilled piauists.
The Director of this department Is a graduate of one of the leading German Con?
servatories, instructor of Vocal Music educated in tl.e Boston Conservatory and
the School" of Italy. Art Department in charge of a lady educated at the Art
League and Schools of Paris. All branches of Art are taught, including
pen and ink drawing, water colors, charcoal, crayon, jvistel, tapestry, ete. A
thorough Business Course given when desired. Teacher of this department has
been educated in the Schools of New York. Day patronage solicited.
Por catalogue And other information address the. President,
MATTIE P. HARRIS, Roanoke, Virginia.
LIKE A GOOD TEMPER SHEDS A