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'1 HE BEE: OMAHA, FRIDAY. J AX CART
THE iA uJSf ?EJ
roi'NnlcD uy kuwakd 'koskwatkk
VICTOR MOSKWATKR. KDITOn.
HUE BtljLDljCagARXAai ANU irTJl. ,
Kntered at Omaha postorffee as second- (
t ass matter j
TERMS OF SrBSCRIPTlON! .
Su"l&. lie, our. year K2
Saturday Bte. one year
raily J".ee, without Sunday, ana year. 4 00
Iai!y Bee. .md Sunday, one year t.M
DELIVERED RV CARRtHR.
K-er.Ing and Sunday, per month Jeo
Fvenlng without Sundav. per month.. 3e
Daity Hrfi. Including Sunday, per mo. ro
Pauv Be, without Sundav. prr mp... 46e
d''ress all complaints or Irregularities
I" deMvnry to nt .- CtrtviMtlor Dept.
"ttm.t hv draft. rw or postal order,
pava&c to Tlio Bee Publishing company.
Ofi'V l-r'ftH stamps reted In payment
of sma)' account. Personal cheeks,
reot or. Omaha and eastern exchange, not
Omaha The Bee building.
Pouth Omaha 2313 N street,
r.tunel) Bluffs-14 N'otth Main street.
I.'ncolr. Utile building.
Chicago J04t Marquette building.
Kansas ttty Reliance building.
Kew Tork-5 "West Thirtv-thlrd.
Rt Ioj1s-4 FrUco building.
ashlngton 736 Fourteenth Bt.. N. W
ommunlcatlons relating to news and
e'forial matter should be addressed
'rr.aha. Bee. Editorial department.
State of Nebraska, County of Douglas, :
Dwlght Williams, circulation manasrer
of The Re Publishing company, being
duly sworn, ssys that the average dally
circulation for the month of December,
112, ITU 45,044. DWIOHT WILL1AM8.
Subscribed In my presence and aworn
to before me this Slit day of December,
ISU. ROBERT HUNTER.
BsX Notary Fublle.
obaerlbrra 1eTlnsj the city
temporarily ahould luav. The Ba
laalled to thrm. Address will be
hnnae4 often mm reemeetfrd.
Turkey insists it shall not be en
tirely gobbled up.
A. few other leaks in the water
department also need calking.
Blue sky laws aro noeded to dls-
91 the clouds hiding the fakers.
Even if Mr. Rockefeller oannot
talk, he has some money that can.
Why all thk furors ever sawing
the birds here in the dead of win
Tho Chinese day Is dlvldod.into
twelte parts, we are told. Pay-dart
"Turkey has gone to coda," saya
tho St. Louts Republic. Re, con, or
They aro dragging that tobacco
talk before tub tariff tinkers.
It it aot always the ground you
cover so much as how competely
you coyer It that counts most.
It Is always safo for one to let
some one else pass on an achieve
ment before determining Its super
It is reassuring to know anyway
that the pink little flower girls car
ried pink roses which matched their
Senator Root's plan for Inaufcurat
lug presidents in December might
give a little Christmas cheer to tho
Whore Is that Old-fashioned boy
who used to haro his nose hold
"while mother poured castor oil
down his throat?
A moving picture film of the
Omaha water board fed6eAilng tho
prowlso of I6wer rates would be the
hit of tke seaon.
Tk Centntarclal club will do well
to keep tfial letter written by the
Burllflgt6n president, and check off
the premises as they are redeemed
A new 13,000 appointive job as
election commissioner for Douglas
county Is proposed. Now for whom
caa It fe that this soft berth Is being
As soon as the bousewlve leagues
succeed In permanently reducing the
price ot eege. perhaps they would
not mind tackling the Job of un
Perhaps the safe way would be to
install the health department In the
entrance corridor of the city hall
aud mafco fcvefy visitor to tho build
fug Pcs medical Inspection.
Well, if Tho Bee succeeds in wak
IiiK up Us nlcHpy contemporary to
fight the battel 6t Omaha Instead
of ajiologUing for "Jim" Hill and
bis railroad, it wilt not have drowed
Mr. Chance objects to the many
published nam de plumes ot the
New York team ho Is to manage.
How about the unpublished names
It was called last year when It fin
Our distinguished law-makers at
Llncoiu wlnt to regulate the use of
newspaper for political advertising.
We move to amend by adding a
clause requiring cash. In-advance
payment by all political candidates.
It the return of our old friend,
Jasper h. McBrlon, to school work
wll really require him to work and
make us lose him from the field of
Nebraska politics, we are not sure
whether the eveut should Inspire
Ksdnees or gladness.
No Elections Force Bill,
t'ntll the full text of tho bill pre-,
senteri at Lincoln to mnko Omaha nj
provlnco of tlio governor so far as ,
holding elections Is concerned 1st
available. discussion of Its details:
win nave to Be deferred, but a few
rciunrKs on its salient, (natures may; thirty Year Ago '
be safely made now. 1 Kotty-four persons are enjoying the'
The Dee has several times udvo- hospitality r Douglas county's poorj
cate.cl completo recasting of our reg-lho,u,c
istratlon laws to remove the lnconJu ii',c!r",?1 J" -t" urn I? 1
, . . .upon Mr. senator ."sunders, who Is III at
vonlences now undergone by tho the Pasinn.
voters Wo would have a porma-i Otoree Valleii. one of the mounted ra. '
nont. rAnlral rnvliilraflnn huiifiAit T tiers, had linifle fttolen from In front .
and a permanent registration Haijf "M oWlw and has be unable :
pcrmltUng transfers and new res-1 w. w. Lowe, .outhweat comer ii.nwv !
tratlons, and romovnl of dead
nameB at any time, with one general
revision In the voting districts be
fore each election. This could be
accomplished by very simple nia-
chlnory with actual siuing of ex
pense. To accomplish this reform.
which is urgent, docs not, however,
requlro a force bill transferrins con
trol of Omaha elections to n non
Outside of registration, the tom-
plalned-of abuses in voting districts
that do not ko the way the com
plainants want them to so, are all
amenable to .existing law wherever
proof of Irregularltlos or fraud Is1
presented, and the safeguards to In
"" oivbiiun uunrux, anu.aoie legislature or tne tate compiled n
to. prevent illegal voting nro amplo
ir enforced, and probably as easily
enforceable as any substitutes. The
theory of our present eloctlon law,
hovever, is correct that the voters
of each election district, not only jn
Omaha but throughout the whole
Btate, are best fitted and best ablo
to conduct their owu elections, and
ta see to it that tholr ballots are
counted the way they are cast. To
deprive Omaha of homo rule In elec
tions would be a discrimination in
favor of all other parts of the state
not so treated, and misuse of such
power as is sought to be lodged In
the governor would make Omaha a
helpless cog In the great stato-wldo
poreonal political machine of tho
first ambitious nnd unscrupulous
When it broke off proceedings in
the London peace council, Turkey
meant evidently to resume them at
the first opportunity offerln h
best bargain tor ending hostilities,
Tills Is Indicated now by the fact that
It has agreed to the plan of Interces
sion proposed by the powers of
Europe. This plan makon certain
stern exactions from Turkey, with
the intercession contingent on Tur
key's pledge to stand by preliminary
results. Assuming that there Is no
thought of depriving Turkey of Con
stantinople, IU expulsion from the
greater part of Ha European terri
tory le the bone of chief contention
and the point of deepest Interest. It
must bo remembered that the Balkan
states, at woll as the most ot
Kurope, are even more determined
on rooting Turkey out of this.terrl
tory than Turkey is on staying.
Vost areas of the most valuable
011 lands In California have been
restored to the government under
the prosent administration and still
vaster areas will be likewise restored
if the government wins Its Cases now
ponding. The realization has dawned
ubon the country that It has been
too free with its petroleum land.
TremendOuB private fortunes have
been carred out of these oil fields in
many states nnd nt last the govorn
mont has awaked to the Importance
ot conserving tho resources that re
main. And the cry goes up that the
government has been tardy In awak
ing, as to tho need of conservation
in oil and in other natural resources.
True, but as the Christian Sclerco
Monitor fairly points ou(, the blame
really rests upon the people. They
have been late In perceiving such
needs, or tho government would not
havo been. Tho people generally can
not evado the responsibility for
neglecting tholr natural resources by
seeking to shift tile blame off on to
official shditlders. It has been only
in the last decade that the people
have shown serious appreciation of
tbeso needs and In that time, surely,
they havo made notable progress to
ward the goal.
An American Marriage.
The marriage of Mtsd Helen Gould
to a work-a-day American railroad
roan is but tbu climax of a lite of
simplicity And usefulness too excep
tional among Amorlcan heiresses. We
have grown accustomed In this coun
try to seeing young women who in
herit great Wealth dleposlng of it
much differently than Miss Could did
by becoming tho brides of titled for
eigners. But Miss Gould early in
her Independent career proved to be
a woman ot unusual business acumen
and, instead ot bartering her millions
for an empty bauble, multiplied them
in the regular channols of invest
ment, while at thef ame time devot
ing large sums to worthy philan
thropies. It ta because of her sym
pathetic contact with the World that
Americans Instinctively feel a deep
her and a sort ot
. . , . , . , j
pride In her Intensely American mar-
A man appeared on a New York
street the other day wearing a !
straw hat. Must have been paying
an election bet lost through over
confidence in straw votes.
This Dc in Croatia
COMPILED ROM DEC riLB.1
land sixteenth streets, want a onod molt !
offerlnr wane at 14 a week.
The pallbearers at the funeral of tha
lit R It Calkins, whose body waa lalt'n
to Fremont, were' T. A. Pleronet. San
uH Atkins, C. Ionj; J. II. McCarty. V.
P. Fuller and .lohn llurlburt.
J. N ('ornlfh of Hamburg, la., le In
George R. Peck of Tope,ka. Kan. n ;
rrKlstered at the Paxton. j
An ad teads: "Why not keen warm!
this cold weather when you can buy
blankets at .1. .1. Orown's great clothlnp
sale at co?"
It was thawiHe preity lively about
noon, hut an hour later a cold wavo
came up and froe everything aualn.
T!",v fvr j
look on for a day or so while the honor- j
few lawa for tlio Kovcrnmcnt of a grtfat
and growing conpr.6nwealth.
Will X Rlock, ropreaentlnr thole oil
favorite. Evans & irony in Charley
Hoyt'a "A Parlor Match," was In town
bavins: the way for a four-hlshtv ?n
BSRenient for his popular company at the
An Important meeting of Hie UentM
men'a Roadatrr club was held at t'e
Merchants hotel E. M. Kartlett wan
elected president; 1). T. Mount, CJ.
Metciilf and W. A. Paxton, fltat, second
and third vlcn president, rrapeftlvely:
II. l Terry was reelccted secretary and
M. If, Martin was made treasurer. The
club adopted a resolution calling on tn ?
street car company to close the slot In
the cable tracks over the city becauio
they were tho means of so many af
dents. Bussy wheels were constantly
belnir caught In t em.
The home of City Councilman and Mrs.
Holomon Prince whs palled with gloom
over the death of their little one,
Josephine, 3 yearn of age The little girl
died of membraneous croup.
Officer W. J. Meals of the police force
and Mlse Alice DeW'clls of Chcstor Hill,
O., were united In marrlagn at 7 p. m,
by tho Rev. Mr, Ttir!le ot the cottage,
20 North Twenty-second street, which
the sturdy groom bad bought and fitted
up for their home.
Ten Years Aro
striking machinists, holleimaker and
blacksmiths of the Union Paclflo met at
the Labor temple and resolved them
selves Into a Locomotive Builders Trades
council to b known ne such In the future.
TW was the result of a community of
Uiterest that Sprung up among tha shop
men since their strike.
floors; T. Sullivan, formerly connected
with J. I. Morgan Co.. and editor of
trie nd J.eiter, grain bulletins, teb
llsh'ed quarter In OnialiXi aolectlng of
flees In the New TOrk Life bulldlnr with
William E. Walsh, formerly of the Trine
Commission company In charge.
C. I Harrison. F. D, Wead and W. 0.
urt, as a ebmmltUe from ths Omaha
eai Kntnte exonange, carried to John K.
ttatdwln of the Union Pacific, a, challenge
to dliaues til subject of terminal taxa
tion with a man whom tha committee
would 'select, probably jr. ' .Mcintosh.
Mr. Baldwin received the gentlemen
cordially, smiled amiably and said he
would enjoy hearing the exchange's case
clearly t rorth .)(! would see them
again, establishing a status quo In which
tha caa remained,
Colonel William Anderson, chief clerk
of the tier Orand, waa preparing to start
upon a, tour of Rome Mlller-a hotel In
terests of the west, going as far aa the
I'aclflo coast, to Inspect and report to
Mr. Miller. It Intended returning by
way ot Ht. Louis.
MISs Ih Mllholland, the New TorK
suffrage leader, la studying for hei bar
examinations In tha law offices of James
Dudley Field Malone. son-in-law of
Senator O'dorman of New York, Is the
latest name on the slate for secretary to
As one or thoaa mentioned aa a possible
secretary of agriculture, Prof. Mooore
Will be expected to offer something espc
dally flno In the way of fourth of March
Vllhjalmar StfanSdn. the Arctic ex
plorer, Is delivering a cnurse of teehi,
rh the espedal guest of the University
or .onn Dakota, from whleh he was eg.
pclled in 1M1 for absenting himself fl0m
his classes and for oth.tr escapades.
Major. L, Baldwin, en of tlie oldest
Danners in J'ew Tork, has resigned as
j president of the Baldwin Bank et Penn
in. cue oi tno nrst iinancinl Institu
tions In western New York, tie has been
president of the bank for ttrtvfour years.
Mrs. Qulney A. Shaw, daughter of th
late Louis Agastlr, has given her home In
tho most aristocratic part of Boston for
lwrmanent headquarters ftf th Women's
Municipal league. One of th many de'
partmenU of tho league Is that of the
Goveinor-elect Dunne of Illinois was
about to refresh the inner man at a
Springfield cafe when his eye caUght the
tin. "Coffee, a Cents." That was te
rich for a governor net yet In office, Be
side h wasn't ready te buy the ahop
Just then. Whereupon he arose, took his
hat and ofoaVd the door after him.
Treclous stones and pearls valued at
149,(71,(43 were Imported Into th United
Male thfdUgh the port of New Tdrk in
'WW, according to the figure announced
by William R. Treadwell, Jewelry exam
Iner at Appraisers' Stores. About K per
cnt et the gems entering the United
States are appraised at that port.
' Zubler Pasha, whose death near
: Khartoum waa recently reported, waa
iwiariouin waa recently reported, was a
hoforiii.. iv trader in th .
was sfleoted ! General "Chinese"
UordOn a Hi only man capable of hold.
ng the country upon his own departure,
AUhoush his recommendation was backed
by Lord Cromer, the British government
refused to send Zubler ta th Sudan, and
the rising of the tribes and tU death or
Twice Told Tales
The I'rmlrnt l'rliice.
Alonto Thompson, known as' "Denver'
best dressed young man," la to Inherit
from his father either $5 or K.OOft.OOO, ac
ootdfng as he succeeds or falls in busi
ness. "U's hard to tell." said Mr. Thompson
the other day. "whether I am to go
through life like the old prlnco or llko
tho young prince.
"There's u story, you know, about a
prudent princess and two royal suitors.
When It was announced that the princess
hud reached a marriageable ago two
princely suitors presented themselves at
"The first was very old and very rich.
He knelt on a rheumatic knee, kissed the
princess' slim white hand, and wheezed:
" 'Ah, I would die for you."
"The princess smiled. 'Stand aelde,' she
said, and there wan no displeasure In her
"Then the second suitor stepped forth.
Uo was very young, very handsome, and
very poor. Kneeling with gallant grace,
ho kissed the princess' hand In his turn
" 'Ah. I would live for you"
"And again the princess smiled.
" 'I am your".' she said, and at the
samr time ahe beckoned to the old prince
to draw near again. 'I am yours Just
as soon as this old gentleman dies for
me ' ' Denver News.
Why 11.- YVhh Tliaiikful.
The small son of the family had climbed
to the top of a forbidden telephone polo,
hut on looking down from the giddy
height Inst his nervo nnd came sliding
down at breakneck speed, running an
ugly silver Into his little body and In
flicting a serious wound. The family
plivslclan came, administered an anaes
thetic ?nd performed the necessary op
oration At the f Irut sign of returning con
sciousness the whlto lips twitched as In
An effort to speak. The anxious mother
bent over tho limp little form, anxious to
catch what might be her darling's last
words. This la what she heard:
"Gee! I'm glad I didn't have my Sun
dny pants on." Kansas City Star.
Wirr lo bluinr.
The prisoner was charged with larceny,
and a lawyer of dubious reputation was
"I submit, gentlemen of the Jury,"
shouted the lawyer, "that the facts dis
closed do not constitute larceny, although
I will concede that the district attorney
is usually a better Judge of stealing than
"But a less successful practitioner,"
waa the disconcerting reply. Judge.
Bawling on the Ball
Baltimore American: The gayety lovers
In Washington are coming to the sad con
clusion that the next inauguration In
Washington will be flat, stale and un
profitable. Houston Post: If the president-elect
Is no fond of red hair as he Imagines, we
suggest that ho hold a reception for thn
democrats who fall to land an office.
They wi) be red-handed, all right.
Louisville CourUrr Journal: President
eleat Wilson, who says he Is opposed to
tho Inaugural ball, la In danger of being
backed Into a corner and forced to say
whether h Is opposed to the turkey trot.
New York Sun: If the residents of
Washington really regard a pnbllo dance
as essential to the miccessful swearing
In Of each new president why don't they
build a ballroom to accommodate tho
Pittsburgh Dispatch: A popular recep
tion Is proposed Instead of the ball hs
more dlfnlfled. but it dignity Is thn de
sideratum, what Is the matter with a
simple Inaugural ceremony and a digni
fied dispersal of the crowd Immediately
after without further hullabaloo, hand or
Kansaa City Times: How much more
powerful the president of the United
States Is than the king of England. Not
all the king's horses and all the king'
men could have prevented the coronation
weeh tu London. But Mr. Wilson knocked
outthe Inaugural ball with a letter.
Irdlanapolls News: The Inaugural ball,
Which, thanks to Governor Wilson Is not
to be given, was almost avowedly a mere
money.makliig enterprise, the revenue
derived therefrom going to those who
underwrote tli "big show." tvith this
chalice to recoup withdrawn It Is possible
that the show will be less big. Thus we
may got back to the better way of or
Political New Brooms
Th "drys" in th Missouri lgtslature
would oak for iS th trenter Who re-
marks, "I'll buy you one."
fn a letter to the officers of the Na
tional Civil Service Pension association
In New Tork, President-elect Wilson goes
on record as favoring pensions for letter
Hon. Frances C. Axlell and Hon. N, J.
Croake, women member of the Wash
ington legislature, are mothering a bill
creating a state marriage bureau "where
a. register of bachelor and maids Can
bo maintained for th benefit of those
seeking a mate."
Nearly l.OCV) nominations are held up
In th United Btatta aenate, representing
an annual salary value of 11,500,000, Dem
ocrats senators desire the decoration for
their pie counter.
Word from Frlnceton Is to the effect
that no man In the United States has yet
been offered a cabinet position by Gov
At the first meeting of the county
board of Jackson county, Missouri,
Wherein Kansas City abides, holders of
thtrty-ftve Jobs were Jarred loose and
JI.0CO a month saved.
Per of radical legislation In Pennsyl
vania caused a hurry call for corporation
mergers. Four hundred aiectrlo light and
power companies have been consolidated
already, and the capltalizstlon watered
sufficiently to resist fire from the state
Hon. Henry E. Lanlut. a blind man. .
an active member of the Pennsylvania
legislature. Twelve years ago he wss
struck blind by a piece of flying steel.
-Ho is an engaging speaker, well posted
on political problems and was elected to
the assembly after a whirlwind "-'-u
In Tork county.
Rlsttit You Are, Mr.
OMAHA. Jan. M.-To the Rdltor of The
Beei A neighbor of mine good-naturedly
took me to task for writing to the papers
now and then.
"I see your name In The Bee's Letter
box;" he said, "don't ou think It's a bad
liloa to get to be known as a fellow who
writes pieces to his paper?"
"No," I said, "I do not. On the con
trary. I think lts a mighty fine thing.
The eidtor haa the biggest voice of any
body and this only gives me a chance to
got In on some of his privileges. If he
lets me express my own personal views
In his paper, why, I'd he a dunce not
to take Mm up on it. especially when I
have views I'd like to make public."
As a matter of fact. I think every man
ought to feel enough Interest In the Af
fairs ot his city and family newspaper,
which Is the real public forum, to write
to It whenever the spirit moves htm. 1
don't believe In harassing an editor or
becoming a nuisance to Its readers, but If
I subscribe for your paper I do feel that
I have a perfect right to avail myself of
your Invitation. If I nm wrong, plcnse
set me right. JOHN H. M'HBNRV.
Miiro Mone?- for Streets.
OMAHA, Jan. 23. To the Kdltor of Tho
Bcc: Whatever els oin new chstn-r pro
ides let us pray that It will afford us the
means of inlsliig sufficient inonej t
(ako metropolitan carf of our streets.
Property values would be enhanced, sen
ttary conditions Improved and the much
mooted city beautiful proposition ad
vanced bv such provision. F. B P.
Cnr Scrvloi- to the IIIrIi Srliool.
OMAHA, Jan. 22 To the Kdltor of The
Bee: The business men are complaining
ttvu thn service on the North Twenty-
I fourth street car lino Is Insufficient for
High school pupils and the men who must
(let to business. Mothers, of course, could
not operate stieet car lines, but they have
some sane Idea about the welfare of
their children. My children have at
tended High school for ten years under
the present Inconvenient system of trans
ftrs. Since they still have before them
six years of transportation to the High
school, I am Interested In this street car
Why not please thesw business men by
giving the High school pupils better,
quicker, safer and less fatiguing trans
portation? It Is simple enough to run
alternate cars on North Twenty-fourth
street over the cross-town line, thus
saving much valuable time to the pupils,
who at present must leave home unrea
sonably early, run the chance of a crowd
at the transfer, perhaps a late car and
so be tardy at tho High school.
Agnin. why should pupils still be com
pelled to reach the High BChool from the
east side, with its long flight of steps,
when they could save time and fatigue
by arriving at the west on tho level side?
Again, why must young boys and girls
have the unnecessary .transfer either
from North Twenty-fourth and Lake or
Twentieth and Cuming streets, w hen this
transfer compels them, while waiting for
th car, to stand by a saloon, which the
law forbids within several hundred feet
from any school building?
Let us please these business men1, and,
by nil means, let us safeguard our chil
dren. Let us conserve their time, health,
good manners and morals.
MRS. T, W. G., A MOTHER.
Farmer la AVnklnMT Up.
BARTLBY, Neb., Jan. 22,-To the Ed
ltor of The Bee: In answer to the Sli
ver Creek man who had a letter In your
The American farmers are Just awak
ing to the horrible fact that they are
least considered In financing the gov
ernment and school, and yet they are
tho greatest concerned, because "the
common people" are the majority In
numbers. The reason for their being
preyed Upon is because they have been
asleep while the other professions and
the financiers have been working until
the farmers are bound down by the
aristocratic bank system. There are
twenty depositors In a bank to one
Stockholder, yet that one stockholder
dictates how your money shall be used.
To break this and have a representa
tive financial democracy the farmers
must get togethor. They have lost con
fidence, or never had any, In their own
ability to figure out the problems ot
finance and have allowed the other fel
low to make the prlco they receive for
their product, also what they pay for
their sustenance. Organised labor to
day controls the wages the laboring men
get: organised agriculture would con
trol the price of products.
Every state should be organised in
one grand organization ot co-operative
farmers, with branch organizations In
even' county and every preelnct. It Is
possible on the same system that we
snd our representatives to state con
ventions from caucuses of the precinct
and county. Not n a farmer, but as
an editor, who bs read and. thought on
the aubject. do I submit this. Herbert
Myrlck of Springfield. Mass., has r sys
tem that should Interest every farmer.
As to the levies Mr. Wooster men
tioned, we surely can trust our repre
sentatives to consider them well before
they are acted upon, but T do think
that the atat university should be on
tho state farm Instead of Cramped up
In p. city for the sake of harmony be
tween our personal Interests nnd the
growth ot what w love education.
B. C. MILLKR, Editor.
STORIES THE WANT ADS TELL.
Wanted Family automobile In good
condition. Speed not a requisite, H.
A. Bugg, Box 5.
(One wtkk later.)
Wanted To trade four-passenger ma
chine for fast runabout. H. A. Bugg,
(The third week.)
Wanted To exchange speedy runabout
for racer. 11- A. Bugff. Box 5.
(The fourth weelc)
Wanted Car capable of fifty miles an
hour. I lave slower car add some cash.
H. A. Bugg, Box 6.
(The fifth week.)
Wanted Wilt exchange residence prop
erty and peedy car for machine cpa
able of developing over a mil a min
ute. II. A. Bugg. Box t.
(The sixth week.)
Wanted Will exchange fast motor car,
slightly damaged, for professional serv
ices of first-rlasa surgeon. H. A.
Bugg, Box S Judge.
BoostliiK Direct Ulertlon.
j St. Louis uioDe-uemocrai
Th Wyoming legislature appear to De
under an Impression that th constitu
tional amendment for th direct election
ot senators Is In danger and Is slvtrur It
Antlstatit Kdltor We'll have to send
that young woman's manuserlpt Iwek.
Her story le too pathetic for eUr pages.
Kdltor Sprinkle a few drops of wutfcr
over It: she'll think they Bre tear drop.
Gabe Young Slonay Is always hollering
that he Is n live wlie.
Steve Mayl'p he Is. He has everything
charged. Cincinnati Knmilrer.
"What's Cholly so downcast about?"
"."rems Ilia father gave him an auto
mobile for Christmas."
"Nothing terrible about that."
"But told him he'd have to earn his own
gasoline." Louisville Courier-Journal.
Pat (lunching besldo the trench) Here
comes i-attier ltyan. put yer hat on.
Mike An phwy should l?
Pat So yn can tskr It off to his rUcr
Inoe. ye fool. Boston Transcript.
"I Put a million dollars Into Your cam
paign." ald the political backer.
-wen, replied the candidate, "l gavo
an equivalent. I nut mv whole heart
"Great Scott: Kvcn the Chicago meat
packers don't attempt to maintain any
such scnlo of prices ns that!" Washing
Old Hunks-More money? Whut Mnr
"Tears," said a famous medical man,
"havo a high antiseptic value."
Another coveit boost for our old friend,
the onion Cleveland Plain IJealer.
Why Is It that llcndrlx Is able to dress
so much better ami llvo In so much flnr
style than you do I understand that his
salary Is no higher than yours."
"The explanation Is very simple. Me
has a daughter ami 1 have a Son. My
son has to pay the expenses for both
Thrre l more nutrition in a
spaghetti man mere in
doctor will conllrm mix.
FAUST SPAGHETTI is extremely
tluten, the muscle, bone and llesh builder
FAUST SPAGHETTI will reduce rour
two-thirdj. Write lor tree recipe book and
the treat varteir ai appctizinc.
savory dishes that can be made
with this nutritious, cheap
Comfortable, home - like,
furnished rooms can be found in
the Bee classified pages. The beBt
apartments and rooms in Omaha
are advertised in the Bee.
If you have room to rent
tell the large crowd of Bee
readers. You'll get a desirable
tenant get him quickly.
Phone your ad in; we'll collect
i henexi i thri gn Hhjwhcn- tog-tin.r
ten so iucotd-llerald.
She At what age do ou
woman ceases to be rbarmlnsr?
He-Oh. nulte n distance from your
present age. I'm sure. Hnwton Transcript
HEIGI1T0F THE RIDICULOUS.
Oliver Wlndell Holmes.
1 wrote some lines ouee on a time
In a wondrous merry mood.
And thought, usual, men would sy
They were exceeding good.
They were so mieer. o very queer,
I laughed as I would die;
Albeit, In a general way,
A sober man urn 1.
1 called my servant, and he carnal
How kind It was of him
To mind a slender man like me.
He of the mighty limb!
"These to the printer," 1 exclaimed,
And, In my humorotif way.
I added (ns a trifling lost).
"There'll be the devil to pay.'
He took the paper, and 1 watched,
And saw him peep within;
At tho first line he rrad, his face
Was all upon n grin.
He read the next; thn grin grow broad,
And shot from ear to car;
Hp rend the third; a chuckling noise
1 now boguii to hear.
The fourth; he broke into a roar;
Tho fifth; his waistband split:
The sixth: he burst five buttons off,
And tumbled In R tit.
Ten d.i'S and nights, with sleepless eye,
1 watched that wretched man,
And since. I never dare to write
As funny as I can.
10c nackaee ol FAUST
4 int. o bcei-rour
Are on Sale Daily
via the C. C& N. W. Ry.
to Florida, Cuba,
j-Hft New Orleans,
Mobile and the
trains of the
Northwestern Railway between Omaha
and Chicago connect at the latte-r city
with all lines to the South and South
east, forming a passenger service that
cannot be surpassed.
Through railway and tUamthip tichtl
arm alio an Mah fa the Mtdlltrrantan,
th Holy Land and to all European eitU:
Sleeping car reservations and reservations of
space on steamships to points named above
given prompt and careful attention.
Trains Leave Omaha for Chicago
7 AO a. m. 6:00 p. m. 8:50 p. m.
1 2:05 p. ra. 6:35 p. in. 1 2.45 a. ra.
7:55 p.m. Alt Dally
The Best of Everything
North Western Ry,
1401-1403 Farnam Street