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The Inter-mountain farmer and ranchman. [volume] (Salt Lake City, Utah) 1902-1902, February 25, 1902, Image 9

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Persistent link: https://chroniclingamerica.loc.gov/lccn/2010218500/1902-02-25/ed-1/seq-9/

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Tim IwruR'ltloxrsTxns; Vaiimfai axd ILvyoiorAy, tukspat McmyiyG, FEimuATtv 2, 1003-. D M
H1!
-A--J TOLD pBilii
... e Black Cat BlBf
(SBb-o-o-w on ' shrieked I ho black
Hfcome on over fellcra an' girls,
IHyo a duo lunch gratia Willi me
JMmllk enough to elinwn In"
he 'fellers mine, a goodly ns
o of grlmulkln nrlstncrncy.
A8 cllnw I,ou from the llit
in the tnrner, minus a tall nml
i I'cppcr nnd-tfalt 1' te, a no
gal! mt the focus of fully half
nc scandil Hint ranged the
irds of Hit1 neighborhood, and
,lz who was lately seen Willi
air of rntclllto kittens Itcsldes
tle crew then were other rata
u shidc anil more or lcn re
Itllv. They scratched up to tlio
the fene ami tumble l mer,
Ij trciellng Hie emnlum lied
served m a garden, and llnilly
In u lapping ilirlc nrouud the
i,nl of milk oor which Hlack
ersldul with nugtist liopinllt
npplng ceased not through Uck
g lather because of It, and
.eniiiit glilng out of the supply
Then White I.lz spoke up In
put suburb in tone She slanged
nil)
smithereens, Thninis' 'they
en enguged once, and after the
meat was broken she nlwnvs
dm Thomas), how on earth did
ippen' Two weeks ago jou
firound looking like a cidavet
on dlsipieaied While we are
Ing whit In blue b!u7cs Iccnme
Wm4iPJ
-
o a Dairy Lunch With Me."
jou turn up without wainlnr.
the comer butchei and as will
inert lias Ilrldget iclented"
ehes gone," said Tom, trluui
. Then ho turned to tho listen
oup "You hnvo all doubtless
of the waj Hildget tre ited mo
lie folks our folks -left fm thu
e. Why, the last words of lien.
I'll our youngest were Take
Tom. Ilrldget, and see that he
for nothing ' And that hypo,
miss of mlBnamed liuollli,eiieo
ilandlj, 'Yls miss' liei veiy
,'ls, miss' They lift tho house
ere scarcely at the cornir when
nfounded bit of Imbeillltj '
Wthat again," lnuiniptc.il Pep.
M-Hnlt I'ele, whose early strug
H existent o had Inttifeied ie
HB'hls eduentlon. "If that a ling.
BHIon t snvvj" '"
Biui"t"B'" cnor"Re1 tl10 rct.
gi about to remark," sild jiiaek
Tom with line scorn, 'the fnmlly had
srairely left when thit concentrated
atom of Inaptitude ripped the ribbon
from my ncik. klckel me, turned mo
out of doors without ceremony and
warned me that "If ye lcr show jer
black ellvll face agin yell be Imng'd,
su je will '
"I went. My Bufferings nn be better
Imagined than described Th Ink of m
"Jumped In and Hid Myself."
creeping about In tho licit nnd nln:
I who hid known nothing hut coddling
nnd luxury from the dij I first saw
the light In that ery cellar W-e-l-l,
she mij havo thmnn me out, but she
was not rid of me I ill earned of my
revenue K-r-r-r o-v-e-n-go o1"
"Solinds like u dime novel," suggest
ed cllow Lou,
"I'stt'" thin from White I.lz, who
was Interested In the nbsorptton Then
she nddid ' Somo folks do i.ot know
how to behave In decent snsslety Dash
my bulwarks, that may be all right on
the turner s iloon, but cut It out when
jou nie a RiieBt In th1 brown front row.
Chop It, Do It at,ln and jou will be In
vited to rcsoom jour station on tho file
cscarc,"
Thinks," said Tom. Then ho went
on.
' W-o-l-l I wntilied and waited nnd
waited nnd watched l.very nlkht I
took up mi station bick of the kitchen
window. Hut, bless ou, theio was not
much to re sein Ilrldget was llvlrg
In stjlo mil bad mocd up to the fund
ly'B apartments bo I found tho old
secret pissigo tluough tho toal bin
nnd I roinied nnd linunted the place
nights. It was almost ton miuli to bear
to ireep llko a common burglar where
I hud a perfect right One night I ran
across my own llttlo bluo uishion lying
on tho nursery floor, and I almost
cried.
"lho sights I saw I shall never for
get, If I lho to end out my ninth ex
istence My hair almost turned gra.
"To begin with, Ilrldget planted an
Immigrant lolonj right unlcr our loof.
I Two fenialo cousins onuplod misses'
I bedroom Ilrldget herself slept In Miss
IMythes boudoir, light In the blid's
ovo maple bedstead 8ho used every
thing she could lay her bands on Thoy
nlo their meals (seven a daj) In the
bnclt parlor. And such meals! Ico
cream and slues who a continuous
perfoimanre. Tried spring thicken
was n staple. Aspiingus, ciullllowei
nnd oilier hothouse rm lilts become,
dally necessities Of courso tho trades
piopln welt- In tho deal. With my own
eaia I heard Ilrldget caution the grocer
boy to Hit It all on tho Mny bill ex
ccpt butler untl snlt and cmtme.il
"ho nutters went-from bid to
woise. Ae had nn average of threo
fettd a week You ma bo suio there
1 I
H "Tuinatl Me Out of Doors Without Cciemony,"
was a plethora of miscullnlty nil cous
ins Wo entertained the district leader,
two captilns and three electric cir con
ductors of undisputed weilth All of
this time I was plmnlng my little plans.
Difficulties beset me on cery band.
"How could I communlcaln with our
folks? In a general way 1 knew they
were nt Iong llrinrh but wlnt specific
roof sheltered them 1 did not know.
And If I did? Of course. I have often
heard the master referrel to on''bnite'
Tho missis, with like eonnublnl out
spokcnness,I have often heard inlled.
'an old cot,' but of couise I am nwnio
that that Is playful and melnphorical,
and that they do not understand u
word of our linguago.
"At Inst I hit upon a plan. It wns a
desperate chance, but an only chance
When I bid tho details nil nrranged I
stnrvcd mjself not ery dlflltult un
der tho circumstances until I wns hut
a shadow of my former saturnine sleek
ness "
Hero Yellow Lou nlsed a skeptic il
evebion, but wns stured Into silence by
White Liz
' Tor ten dnys," continued Tom, "I
did not eat a bite. At last one tliy,
when Ilrldget was picking tho wash
hampir that mntlo weekly excursions
to and from tho seashore, I Jumped In
nnd hid mvself, and allowed mjself to
suffer tho agonies of transportation Of
tho express companies tho less said tho
better. I was pulled and hauled, jerked
and miulcd, hammered nnd shoved un
til I felt llko an untlnned boneless ham
doing through tho Nlagira whirlpool
Is ildlng on nn nspbnlt pavement com
paiod to my trip When I had about
given up hope of ever seeing daylight
again wo reached tho hotel. With Joy
unbounded I heard Ilcssle's olcc
'Open tho basket, ma." Then I fainted.
'When I enmo to I wns In llesslos
lap, her arms about my neck. 'I know,'
sho sild. with amazing perspicacity,
'Hildget his been a brute, and ho has
come all the way down hero to tell us
about It. My poor pussy!' "
GOING TO THE ANIMAL SHOW.
BY WALTER W. STORMS.
News of tho animal show spread rap
Idly through animal land, nnd all who
could possibly arrange to go determined
to do so. It wns cnily In the fall. Somo
who wcio already prepurlng to spend
tho winter In the feouth put off every
thing until nfter the show. It was go
ing to bo the event of the season Ani
mals living at a distance would start
long ahead of time, tiavel by day and
enmp for rest nt nlfillt. Nocturnals, llko
tho bitB and owls, traveled by night
and slei t by clay. The turtle started ten
dnjB before the tlm. Tho snnll was on
tho way nenily a month, and never
renchert thero until the day nfter the
show .
rlmall folks took lunth with them, ns
much ns they could t iny, 'lho lion, tho
wolf, the tiger and the tot, sill: 'Theio
will bo plenty that wo can rlek up by
the way" fw they milled no food with
them, nnd yet none of them went hun-
There wns many a cuilous outfit to be
seen along the load, bome folks from
ilia back districts hardly knew what
was the correct thing One of these dull
crentuies was the hl popotarnus He
reallv had never been away Irom home
In hlM whole life, and was much ells,
ttpchccl over what ho should wear. He
wanted bomethlng both pietty nnd sub
stnnllil Ills one fear was that he might
get wtl and catch cold He knew how
It hoiucllmes mini i ntnnu tho liver
wlieie ho live I and Imw easy It wns
to duck down undii the vvalei until lho
rnln was over What piolectlon would
be hue If caught In a lain miles and
miles fioin home He cnuldu t get tho
notion tluoiiBli his lie id hit any gown
would bo both suitable and safe except
i mackintosh leichlng clear lo his feel,
'I he muskrntj, father, mothei nnd
ynungsleis nil tarried small umliiellus,
so did the beavei The ciow curried a
parasol lo keep oil the inn, the leopard
ran led one becau ho dreided fiecklts
Tho iirlzzls had an ulster to hunril
ugiilufcl n possible rnlrt snap, nnd one
animal so dlsiegarded all rules of polllo
society ns lo come In his bear skin 'I he
horses didn't do much better they Just
HorecolHrs nothing more
When the hlorloua da finally dawned
m i, he drugoi-flfes decided 'o e i tjrand
Jy 'jLtall for ifie inscefs iW hid been spend
pmT (N ) !ncj llic summer 'in c5fiVde' ' "'s
t - was To wind if llic Ifoppy
scASon wnkr. ill llic, j. hid cnjovedTKy ,
invited trie mill- ? 7T ecJ!w
whoMme in her red Jfj"0 white b y
bjtjbuitcr.l And Ire handsome swallow-tailed -fejP
Thepj& 5g$femc' wearing tlirir
coih of sWntng gold color,'! red, brown and
blade. Even the poorjf tniiconic.lr.uinp
fntJ arjainsi' ouryr-p- screens in tho evenimjwas
there. "eyA?. ' "ie ')a" vvcrc "" dem
oiselles dreSed in the lovliest K El
of blact and smoke-colored laces. 4ai4 WS
TEc orchestra was .very fic.pplayed
his(SCthe latydid her fid WV die and
Ihe ryhrurned on his banjo. Even the moscju"
9lvroc4hurnriied aS ihey walked. Tic
re J house chirruped her cheerful song'
and flic gf$ Sffliti&i 1'ic'r )X" V,C'S'
Oh, how Ttwy did."v3fe andlussez andpA
there was big bustle along all the roads
lending to the show tents. Curiosity ran
high Oreat and small were on the
move, hippopotamus n heart was In his
throat for fear bo might appear awk
ward. The wildcat met the loon nnd
said, ' Goln'7"
' Oh dear, yes"' said the loon. "I'm
Just crazy to see tho show."
'I've been perfectly wild," responded
the cat, 'ever since 1 heard It wan com
ing" In fact, nobody seemed altogether
calm except the grasshopper. He bad
clone nothing but enjoy himself all sum
mer, eating nnd singing to his heart's
content. Hut he hadn't saved a penny
He knew he couldn t go to the show and
hnd mnde up his mind that ho woull
Just sit on the feme. 1'omlng out of his
old stubblc-lleld. he hopped up to the
top rail and sat there for n pleasant
word with all who cared to speak as
they passed b, and, Indeed, It wns
nmuslng to heir how manv plum tho
various animal folks hnd for getting In
The turtle wns one of the earliest on
the road. Her plan was simply to be
come Invisible Just befoie she reached
the ticket olllco nnd then reappear after
she got Inside Tho pig wouldn't tell
her plan, but declnred she could get In
slick ns grease. The lizard hoped to get
In with his long gieen, while redbreast
whispered 'I ought to have plenty,
I've been robin all summer.'
'Hello" snld the grasshopper, 'here
comes old dos Trav Good morning,
Tray, Which was nre sou heuded?'
' For the show,"' answered Tray, "I'm
to be one of the birkcrs "
Next camo tho old gray goose, looking
ns silly ns her reputation would allow,
Bho answered the grasshopper's greet
ing but, without stopping to chat. Just
said that she thought llic would admit
her becauso she dldn t know any better.
The ciow hopped by, hoping to get In
becaws
Then came some frogs, rlppetj-nip six
feet at a Jump, like so many rubber
balls
"Iley there!" shouted grasshopper,
Goln'7'
"Yes," they answered In chorus,
How 'II you nil get In?"
Greenbacks
' Ooodl ' jelled tho grasshopper nt the
frogs, looking now like smnll specks,
bouncing nlong down the road. He was
laughing yet nt such cleverness when
the lion and his wife came walking ma
jestically by, 'Hoppei looked serious In
nn instant and gave the military salute
Force of habit, howiver, led him to nsk
tho lion how ho expected to get In.
"Walk In " said the lion, with something
urs much like a growl
' II m' ' mused tho grasshopper, strok
Ing his whiskers and looking like Undo
Bam looks when he thinks he sees a
point.
Tho duck next wobbled laboriously
tiy.
' See this bill, 'Hoppei ? ' sild she.
winking both ejes
'Sure'" snld the grasshopper, "tix
are all right. If It Is too largo to get the
leopard to make change for you Ah!
here comes Ilunny with four rabbit feetl
Good luck. Bunny! You are sine to get
there."
' hee ans thing of turtle this morning? '
nsked Ilunny, timidly. foho Is nhe id of
me, ns usual. '
The rhinoceros enmo next, lumbering
nlnng, the perspiration dripping from
his sides, 'Oh, dear." he bellowed, "am
I going to bo too late to get a seat' I
nm nenrls rendy to drop now. What If
I havo to stond nil through the perform
ance' '
"Yes rthlny," answered the grasshop.
per, 'vnu nre almost Fure to ha late
nnd whnt Is worse I don't thlnlt oull
get In nt all. You look too tough My
advice to you Is to go 'way back."
"Ah Miss I'eicoilc, good moinlng.
lou are going, I suppose. How do jou
expect to get In?'
' In stile"
Lnst of .ill came the pirrot nnd the
monkey, arm 111 nrm They hid somo
trouble to keep step, but seemed ie
solved to travel together
"Howdy, Monk' shouted tho grass
hopper ' Good time?"
"Ask Polly," sild the monkey.
'How will jou get In, Monk?" nsked
Giasshopper
' Look fiimlllar-llke nt the ticket agent
and ray 'Why. brother, you know me
don t you' '
"How nbout roily"
' Oh I II Just talk his arm off " said
Toll answering for herself ' He will be
glnd rnnuah to ms both of us Come
nlong, 'Hopper, I II take jou In, too, un
der my w Ing "
"No no. folly Many thanks I havo
had nil the fun I ran carry for one day,
seeing nil the fnlka go by I'll go bnck
to my old brown stubble-field. Thanks,
Just the same,'
AN ILLUSTRATED RIDDLE.
What InBect Docs This Ocntlcman HcsembleP Answer A Hook Worm. H
J?$0 tyfkyw) &3-:n !t RcaoiiMCrpiaTj voold eU t H
CTjfr-lSw-A- MOST!, UNOSUM, rtIIlTCJ- TO S5J'j tH
Tcaix TtlEiV EPTtT) LOKJ4 TOHlJ, EtEjCAUSSj JH
sjA tafj L thiwk, Tha2 there ji'ksvekiesk- H
VSreffiJrWraa Muck uoga upqi-t a. p.oul,ikg- pvt.m J M
CONTINUED STORIES-A RECESS GAME. I
Each Flayer Continues the Stoiy. lB
The players sit In n line nnd th one
nt the right hand end of the line starts
thu game He begins by describing nn
Imaginary person, the hern of the
story, and starting thh person on a
course of adventure, nnd does his bent
to place the hem In a situation vtry
hard to get out of. Then the one c t
this plaver's left hnnd takes up tho
tale, and, seltlnc the hcio out of the
(a and li'dc. llTeyjevendiiicf,'c a. . Vi
waIIv with lillle honey (&&$) which Kt
"vtKffjjft hroutjm, for a. nrirc. There iHI
wcte5T v. jjof-llie-villcy filled B
with hotTey-dr.ncifal;rjc M
botli grecnjAnd white. TTierc. , wa.0 H
a. tiny;piccc of stct for ifie "-jKAn J H
sakd.of fender . far tlpTosc thih M
wished it. IheSJcflTcrtjwoven a.,lovcl
sillenj J I J "f '" onwhich.to lay ihe'sprciil- H
Tne7 danced vvfth tlie and the
WS-Acc.withtJio httlc black -. M
IHc Jfvvs' so tall that he had fo waltr H
fifl ill alone. .Madame ,-3rfc H
refused everything thata.s otfercd H
her so the Litest Slrtcd awiyir M
' and cajugltt her a. - Wncn the H
feast"wa.s over the orcbcstr, pla.ycd H
'Sweet Summer's Ocr and ihcy aJJ sancj, H
a..ti.t'i-"
ai.iculty In the mast logical wa she
ca i Invent, piocociIb with tho story
and places the hero In nunlher IK so
that the next pltoer will have greit
Irouhlo In going on with the ule 'I he
hero njust not be nctuillj killed but
the more dumjerous mil dlllic ult the
positions me In which you leave him,
lho morn (un then Is In the game mid
tle harder the next player will hivo
to work lo hi lug him siftly nut
Tverj phive-r who f tils to risen' tho
hero and lontluue the stoiy must
'drop out ' This will soon bring the H
line of flavors to n. veiy small number. M
and In that respect It Is something llko H
a spelllm, matih but those who have B
to retiio trom the gamo have almost an .'B
much fun as those vvlm remain, tor H
they cun of couiks hear the end (if jH
the storv, although they cannot Joint H
In the llual cluptcr H
This gime win he an Immense aid 4l
lo jou In our roniposltlon work, be. H
sides fui nhthlns many pleasant mo. H

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