SATURDAY, NOVEMBER ai. ipo. THE D K & ft T TAIM11 16 I
AND SHE WAS ALL RIGHT.
IirfP "The other day," said a man pas
senger in a street car, "I saw a woman
in ai street car open a satchel and take
out a purse, close the satchel and open
the purse, take out a dime and close
the purse, open the satchel and! put
in the purse. Then she gave th-e dime
to the conductor and took a nickel in
exchange. Then she opened the sat
chel and took out the purse, closed
the satchel and opened the purse, put
in the nickel and closed the purse,
opened the satchel and put in the
purse, closed the satchel and locked
both ends. Then she felt to see if her
back hair was -all right, and" it was all
right, and she was all right. That
was a woman."
ONE AHEAD OF THE MAGICIAN
The town hall of the village was
crowded to the doors at an entertain
ment given by a magician. Some
clever tricks were performed.
"I defy any one in this audience,"
said the magician, "to mention a
single action that I can perform with
my right hand which I cannot do with
In the silence that followed this
dare, a boy at the back of the hall
shouted: "Put your left hand in ycr
right-hand trouser pocket!"
A "KNOCK-DOWN" ARGUMENT.
A suburban school, just opening for
the season, was composed of both
oity and country children. The teach
er selected eight boys to debate the
subject: "Which is preferable, Coun
try or City Life?"
After they had read many argu
ments with much enthusiasm Country
Hugh laid down his paper and said:
"Mr. President, they don't know what
they're talkin' about. The city boy
knows nothin' about 'going to town
amd that beats anything I know."
Don't you wish you hadn't accused '
that poor fellow of being a coward?
He is dead now and can't defend him
self. If some people o rains were as ac
tive as their tongues they might be
able to say something when they
Remember this: Your absence
from the church is much harder on
you than it is on the church, although
it is hard enough on the church.
If you can't pay the choir and for
the dance music too, may be you had
better pay for the dance music, as we
dan probably persuade the choir to
sing at your funeral for nothing.
"HA, HA!" LAUGHED PAT.
English John and Pat were two
friendly workmen, who were con
stantly tilting, ach one trying to out
wit the other.
"Are yqu good at measurement?"
"I ami that," said Pat quickly.
"Then could you tell me how many
shirts I could get out of a yard,"
"Sure," said Pat, "it depends on
whose yard you get into."
TIME WAS MONEY.
A clergyman not long ago received
the following notice regarding a mar
riage that was to take place at the
"This is to give you notis that I and
Mis Jemima Arabella Brcarly is com
'in' o your church on Saturday after
noon ncx to undergo the operation
of matrimony at your hands. Please
be promp, as' the cab is hired by the
JUST AS GOOD AS EVER, TOO.
An old physician of the last genera
tion was noted for his brusque manner
and old-fashioned methods. One time
a lady called him in to treat her baby
who was slightly ailing. The doctor
"But, Doctor," protested the young
mother, "castor-oil is such an old
"Madam," replied the doctor, "ba
bies arc old-fashioned things."
Cruel "What do you think of my M
execution on the piano?"
"No better place for your execution M
could be chosen. I have always been M
in favor of punishing criminals on the M
scene of the crime." Chicago News. M
M. CHRISTOPHERSON, Mgr.
SALT LAKE NURSERY CO. I
LARGE STOCK OF WINTER H
APPLES BUDDED FROM H
BEARING TREES AND TRUE
TO NAME. I
State Road, bet xzth and xath So. H
Salt Lake City, Utah. H
PARK AND LANDSCAPE I
GROWERS AND IMPORTERS
OF CHOICE NURSERY STOCK H
Kindly mention the "Deseret Far-
mcr" when writing to or doing bui4- fl
nest with our advertisers. M
I Tour of the Tourist j I
SJS REMARKABLE event in the history of automobiledom was the tour of I I
tfw more than thirty Tourist cars from Los Angeles to San Francisco and return, 1 I
bWMM August 12th to 22d, 1908, carrying 94 men, women and children. 1 I
This tour differs radically from any previous automobile run in that practicall) J I
1 every car was operated by its owner instead of a professional driver, thus demonstrating I
: simplicity and case of operation, and proving forcibly that the Tourist is an owner' m
, car so simple in operation and mechanism as to enable the novice to negotiate the
' , severest, test to which an automobile could be put. - 1
ft This more-than-a-thousand-mile-run was successfully accomplished without mishap f I
I or accident, and will live long in the annals of automobiledom as a glowing testimonial S I
m ro mechanical genius and constructional ability. I
The Type "KM Touring Car, that powerful, sturdy "T The Type "O" Tourirt Roadster represents the cul- m H
V Western giant which earned such an enviable reputatioa minatioa point ia two-cylinder automobile construction. W M
the past lew yean, ii a two-cylinder car of remarkable All the feature of tha now famous model "K" are hera H
w ability. ... blended with tha racy, chic line of tha high-priced V H
m hi construction is the very acme of simplicity, and ka roadster. m H
accomplishments have earned for ia makers world-wide Nothiag oa tha market today can compare favorably W H
renown. I I with the type "O" for all around C H
' This car, beautifully finished in a serviceability, style, reliability and low W H
choice of four colors 22 H. P.T I J QRilFDRII P""5. r . , . M
1 ' five-passenger removable tonneau, is J l il DllKllOrUIIU This car with a finely finished H
$1300 at Los Angeles. trunk on rear sulls for $1300. With M
Tourht Cars are covered by a very SALT LAKE CITY auwla rumble seat on trunk, $1325; V H
) liberal guarantee, and with the factory im with alauble individual seat oa Wk H
aoMat haxK1 to replace all parU quickly. UTAH ea,$l350. F. O. B. Lea Ait. B
xml | txt