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T I: Dakota County Herald tons TL TOSXU. The people with the most cheelt don't to the DioRt blushing. Many men make tlie mistake of Jct fng thrlr reputation influence their tbaracter. In nocking the ballot via airships Ihe suffragettes may bo said to have iaken the Wright way. 1 Tho Russian Government refers to iTaxim Gorky as "n house painter." He bj a rough house painter. JSoted clergyman says "the stage la Worse than In the days of pnganlsm." Jiu st be thinking of Salome. A Cleveland man was arrested In Toronto, charged with using a hatchet SO his wife. He claims It was nxo ental. i How many members of the Nevada legislature would be ready to tight In the event Uncle Sum should have a war jirlth Japan? Tift United Stales now owns the rgest war vessel nfnvit, and yet it i: hot quite as larte as the Statu of jKhcxlo Inland . Wilbur Wright pets ?iuk a lesson for Ipflfruetlons In aeronautics. lie doesn't. Joweye'J, undertake to teach pupils to fly by correspondence. demonstrating that agriculture Is tha better for having n Rood sec retary and keeping hi in steadily at the job, Mr. Wilson hn scored a great success, 'pne of the churches Is to have a "al ienee room. It should be Immediate ly onght by people who have just re membered that they left their timbrel as In the ears. V o matter whether he continues to first In peace and first In war or not. JYashlngton will be first In the henrt f every schoolboy as long as the anni versary of his birth Is a legal lioll- Ip excitement even sane jiorsons do turlou's things. It Is related that a bald-headed man was accosted on the ecjc of the sinking Republic by a TV onion with streaming hnlr,i who, In distress, wanted a comb. "I looked V her sadly," the man reports, "then I took off my bat" . Glvo (he fanner good roads, good tpall service, speedy eominunlcntlons with the outside world, and he will do $ii rest The Government can help aim, baa already helped him In many vays, but the farmer has a large voice he Government, too. lie will take Ire of that part of the problem hlin- i -' pesplto all the1 well-meant talk about tt, actual church unity Is probably Im possible, and, If possible, would be of ijoubtul desirability. There are now fcmong the principal denominations few, t any, essential differences of faith, ytwe ore minor differences of creed ni of practice, organization and dis cipline. Rut these are Inevitable and ret alogether undesirable aecompanl tuecta of those differences of tempera bent and taste which ato inseparable from human nature Itself. Tlewed lu the aggregate, the lynch ing phenomena are an appalling fen fire of American social life, and! Justi fy Ju some measure the strictures passed upon us by foreign critics and observers. Whether the recurrence, of his, form of vloleuce Is to bo attribut ed to the faults In tho administration (( criminal law in this country, or Whether It Is a result of the peculiar nature of tho race problem presented py the presence of the negroes lu the jgaldst of white population occupying different plane, of civilization, it re gains a stain upon tho fair name of (ho United States which every patriotic Wlzen would see eliminated. Elizabethan drama seems to show (hat three hundred years ago the pub lic laughed at insanity and madness. Since then wo have come to mich a sympathetic understanding of tho in Bane mind that we cannot laugh at Us locongrultles. It may bo that by sim ilar growth we shall cease to laugh at hO temporary insanity of drunken men. Mr. Rider Haggard, who has made a scientific study of inebriety In England, suggests that one way to en courage temperance is to cease regard ing drunkenness as a Joke. Tho two things will be parallel manifestations of a general improvement; a right minded attitude toward all aspects of drunkenness and a finer sense of hu mor will be characteristic of the same stage of civilization. Old age does not seem to incapacltiito die English clergyman. The Rev. W. vV. Wingneld. vicar of the established church lu Gulval, I'enzance. recently celebrated bis niiiety-tlfth birthday and the 8'veii!y(llfth anniversary of his ap txilntiiieut to his present living. He Is Btill able to preach and write with Much vlg r. There are half a dozen other clergymen who have been In c-bnrgn of their churches for more than aixty years, and a tenure of forty years is qulto common. The longest service on record is that of a vicar of Kli-kmaiiKvvorth. tvho held the living fur eighty-one years, from l.'sti t,i 5"0. Fcrhnps If the churches chose their vicars as the American churches choose their pastors there would lie more fre quent change. Wordsworth, In line of bis finest po ems, laments thai lae days of plain living and high thinking are no moiv. 'J'hN )M'in was written many years go, when according t modern ftand ards. plain living whs the rule, even among the wealthy classes. It has one Tint a hie example In Count Tolstoy, the wealthy end fa.utouH Russian, who lias adopted tUu peasant's drctu and food. ad shares his labors. This, h fan cied Is to live as Christ HviL The only educated Amerl-nn who has lived this life, t.) its utmost limit, when net drWen to do so by stern, necessity, was Henry I). Thoreau. He built himself a hut on the edge of Waldon Pond, and lived there for two and a half years at an expenditure of 27 cents n week. This small sum paid for food, clothing and all other neces saries. Emerson says of Thoreau: "He was bred to no profession, he never married, he lived alone, he never went to church, he never voted, be refused to pay a tax to tho state, hn ate no flesh, ho drank no wine, ho never knew the use of tobacco; and though n naturalist, he used neither trap nor gun." Thoreau was once In prison for disobedience to a law which lie considered infamous. On visiting him In Concord Jail, Emersou saldi "Henry, I nm sorry to seo you here." "Waldo, I nm sorry not to seo you here,"' was Thoreau's reply. The vil lage of Concord was renowned for its plain living and high thinking, as UjO abode of Emerson, Hawthorne, the cotts the Kct (.'banning, Thoreau and oth'-rs of local, but not national, faino. It was a noted seal of literary cul ture. Emerson, the greatest of Its in toljectnal lights, was no epicure. Ills one luxury was pie for breakfast. This was a reminiscence, of that New En gland pie habit, which had come down from tin; Puritans and which Kipling satirizes as prevalent in that part of Vermont, which for a time was his home. "My family don't care for bread any more, and so I give Ihem pie instead," remarked an old fat& loned New England wife and mother. So far as the simple life Is concerned, it has no fixed standards. What soiuo regard as luxurious living Is beggarly economy for others. Dr. Holmes in one of his humorous j; joins, gays, that his wants are very small. He only wishes a brown stone but. This "hut" must front on a sunny and select street, and everything else must be In keeping. .That is the average Anieri can Idea of the simple life. TOO POOB TO PREACH. Mtnlstrr Leaves Pulpit to Take lp the Knle of Devil AVaicona. "I leave the ministry for money. I cannot afford to preach the gospel. I am too poor. This may sound like a startling statement from u preaches, but I w-ant to tell the facts." Thus ' spoke Rev. Eerdlniind S. Rockwell, organizer nud pasto? of Sheridan I 'ark M. E. Church, Chicago, the other day in closing an interview with I'.lshop William I'. .McDowell. He has given up the ministry (br tho ao toiuoblle business. "1 have Im'cii offered tho manage ment of tho New England ollice of a company," added Mr. Rockwell, "nnd I have decided to take it. 1 'reaching the gospel does not pay. If I were u wealthy man 1 would stay In the min istry. Rut I a in not. I am poor and I have 'to make money. I am now making f2,o(M) n year. I cannot live on it ami keep my family as It should live, or maintain the style that I feel a minister's family should maintain. "I have been offered n salary that v:? - F.y.XjOacw&Lb reaches Into live figures. Wouldn't you take It? 1 am speaking as a man, not as a minister. "1 believe it is the duty of every man to give ids wife and children tho very best advantage possible. 1 have been unable to do this lu the minis try. "Is there any one can say I should let my wife and children want for things they need in order that I can preach the gosiel to others? My duty is at home first, l-'or this reason 1 am leaving tho ministry." The resignation of his charge In or der to mnke money hy Rev. Ecrdluaiid S. Rockwell has stirred the Chicago church world. All the ministers of the city were discussing It. The majority did not hesitate to condemn lu severe terms the giving up of preaching the word of God for mercenary purpose. Others believed that any man had a moral right to leave the pulpit for the automobile business or any other busi ness If bo wished to U'tter himself financially. Rev. Rockwell Is V"i years old and has lns'ii lu the ministry twelve years. He has been remarkable as a money rulser ami llfier of mortgages from churchc. His entry Into the ministry was at Eennvllle, Mich., having been engaged previously lu business in Cau ads. fi m wJm EUOLANB A DUMPINO OROUND. t.AItlr la Enfflrrrmrnl cf lb Allen Art la flrlnalna- Obvloaa llrsnH. The t'nltril States Is no ionger re parded as the dumping ground of the criminal classes of the world. The time was when the Hritlsh government made I'C'ist of the fact that she could sen tence, her criminals to prison or to the colonies In America. To-day that same nation Is being blamed by continental Europe for allowing England to become the spawning ground for assassins, anarchits and liomh manufacturers. Laxity in the enforcement of the alien set Is claimed to be neting against all attempts to maintain law and ord r in Ixmdon, and even Sent land Yard finds ever growing dldieulty In keeping the criminal ( lasses under supervision. Eng land Is paying a dear price for her vaunted "rlyht of asylum," nnd Is ac cepting recidivists from the United States and bad men from all the wor'd. Statistics show that during the last year :!!H).K'o aliens landed In the Uni ted Kingdom, The same record show that of the entire number only (Kii were sent back. Tills Is claimed by Englishmen to be proof In itself that the alien act which provides for the re fusal of asylum to criminal class-s and paupers Is a sham and a make be lief. The one bright sot In the situa tion Is the common sense alacrity with which judges and magistrates cite con victed aliens for deportation. Rut po litical refugees' keep coming rind the mawkish sentiment of the ruling pow ers seems to prevent decisive net Ion In n n effort to stem them. The time was when the criminal In vestigation department In Ixmdon made, the boast that within a few min utes' notice It could, draw n cordon about Soho nnd other unsavory rcj'lons In London, north of Oxford Rtreet nnd on the Tottenham court road. Now the ... i V"Jl-,..!' shots trom a SCENES OF THE GREAT inurchlsts, wise in their generation, lave decentralized themselves uud are A be found scattered over the poorer industrial suburbs of the marvelous and constantly growing metropolis. As an example of tin hopeless efforts of Loudon and London pi, lice to cope with the criminal classes of the world the Tottenham case Is cited. It Is only one of u dozen or more, perhaps less serious, hut still based on tho same cause and producing the same r?stilt and happening on the busiest thorough fares of London. The case lias excited comment In tlie world over and is one of the most remarkable affairs that modern London has seen, reminding Americans of an episode In the earlier days on the frontiers of the Wild West. U appears from the facts at hand that Albert J. Key worth, a messenger la tho employ or Messrs. Sehnurrnuinu of the India Rubber works, lu Chestnut road, Tottcuhatn. was bringing jsraK) to tlie plant in a motor car ami was speeding at n good rate, when two men. said to be Russians- ami anarchists, fired several shots through the wind screen, held up the ear, ami succeeded In taking the money and getting away. Then they tried to make their escape b'lrst they pressed an electric tram-car Into service and for five miles gave their pursuers a merry chase, during which time they tired hiiudrei's of shots unit succeeded in Injuring i-.lxtecn per sons, fatally wounding a lad by the inline of Jocclyn, 10 years of age, and In killing l'filice Constable Tj ler, of tie Tottenham division force. Drhen from lite tram car the men made an effort to continue flight on a milk carl, but they were f irecd t take to their heels and one committed sui cide after falling to mount a fence which he hoped lo cress. The other concealed himself Ui an old shack and there committed suicide rather than he taken alive. Such a running light Is a thiig not to lie found in the annals of! criminal history In any city in Amer ica, and shows that England U lu dan cer of lolii' her vaunted prestige as the foremost lavt -nhliilii'; country In the world. NOVEL HEi"C"MINQ SCHEME. How nti linll.iuu 1 1 tt i, t.ot Itii! ,.l It I'r iC 'm,nu I l.oofcra. If (Iwcnsvllle. I ml., ever had profes sional I oaf i is. i! has rone now -- at least In HljtUt nevrding to n.lv I cs from that proutv-sixe mi:,. Indiana town. A l.euspei,r of Ihe place of fcred n prhe lor the best essay on the subject "The Loafer.'' The terms pro vided that suhniltcd articles should '1Vrf-s ..VW,''-iw wmi be required to gle the characteristic, of the professional loafer. High school students became Interested In the con test and planned "observing tours" thr"gb the business dNtrlcl of tlie town which would afford opsrtunlt les to study the characteristics of the fel low who rousts his shins behind the stove at the corner grocery from morn ing until niu'Iit nod who obtains his tioonda lunch from the nearby crack er box and pickle barrel. The pro posed lours caused much talk and led to n marked reform. Now when the bell ring's fur tlie close of school lliose who are in the habit of meeting In the corner grocery make a bee line for home fir some ether biding place. "What's the matter. Sam? Coin' home pretty early, ain't yon?" asked a grocer as one of the Idlers hurried out of the st'ire. "Don't want none of them literary fellers wiitin' nio d.iwu as n loafer. Coin' home before they eoilio." He went, and so have gone all the other corner grocery statesmen since the students began this practical finest for specimens. I'cw M rritinll ure l.rfl. The slraiu'est of nil si range fish must be the manatee' and the dugolig. The latter Is II. e mermaid of fabled lore. The dugong live In (locks along the shores of Hie Indian ocean, the Red Sea and' tlie Culf of Mannar, where they browse on seaweed and liver vegetation. They are very affectionate In dis position, nnd es;i"cla!l.v is thl.n shown In tlie love of the mother for her off spring, which is much stromror than her instinct for self preservation. The male will imt leave the female if she be attacked, and Instances are on rec ord where the companions of the man atee gathered roirhd ami made an effort to withdrew the deadly Imrpoon. H is supposed that the ' rude up- THE SHOT THAT STOPPED THE r' EURSWriq CAR.' .1 vA mm a . 1 ;; ui,. , .,l ; .: - Ij I -a l m Muvets.x ill Mituii m HEATH oTVC' P.CTYt6R.!iV---V TOTTENHAM OUTRAGES. proach to the human outline observed in the Khnpe of tho head of the dugong. the attitude of the mother in clasping her young to her breast with one Hip per while swimming with I lie other, holding both above w;p.r ami sud denly ilivitr; and showing her tishliko tail when alarmed, gave rise to the mermaid myth, first told by the Arab seamen. Jules Verne uiei a thrilling description of the capture of a dugong In the Red sea when Its flesh was de sired as food. Naturalists tell ns that tho flesh tir the manatee or 'of the dugong much resembles well-fatted pork of pleasant flavor anil Is highly esteemed as food. l'or this reason they were much hunted ami are fust becoming exlinct. Eleld aid Stream. IVfitUinfit AftNetH. A great portion of the public domain Is poor land, worthless for fanning purposes, hut, on tho other hand, there are large deposits of coal, oil nnd other minerals of Immense value nud vast ro'vsls that will furnish timber for generations to co Naturally, such states as Montana. Idaho and Nevada look upon the public lands in their bor ders as the possession of their citizens. They are anxious to have tlie tracts divided ami given to settlers, so that the imputation may be increased nnd the resources of the states developed. Rut the public lands are peculiarly the possession of tlie natiou and must be safeguarded as an important national asset. The time Is pist when they may be given to settlers by Ihe thou sand acres, reuced In by cattle kings and appropriated by railroads. Stricter land laws and strict euforct mi nt of them are evidences of Ihe government's intention lo prolei t Its lands and hold them In the Interest of all tlie people. So lit Ctiiil,! I nilt-ralniiil. k. ... lf,is - . iT!v'lv,:--. a "'Y'- iV'fr- Trunin Madam, 1 nai no ordinary uiu'o'-tucatc. I can translate into (he I 'rench lil i . LTIl.l lii lui I b hi -fewii'e- That so Then render "Sl.ido-r Ii to Ereiu h, and do it. Some men win woiU harder to t;i't even than to get n;onej. . j (diCAP.roU THE WHITE HOwie tim? Jdti: mmmdsmm W. Aniertefiii ri-voliit ton T a new nation. The nation needed a capi I tal. a seat of government with a federal iiouse ior us i f ingress nnu executive nu cers. Even before tho adopt Ion of the Constitution welded the' States Into a strong Eederul nation this need wns recog nized by tho Congress of tlie confederation and a com mission appointed to select a site somewhere upon tho Delaware. Nothing was nc omplished, but the Constitution-maker provided for the creation of a capital city. Tho men nnd communities of the eighteenth century were in many ways not far removed from those of to day. Sectional feeling was as strong then as now. New 1'ork, Philadelphia. Ralliinoie, Trenton, Ilurrlsbiirg, all srged their special claims to be made the capital city. Maryland and Virginia both offered the necessary terri tory. Tho compromise having been arranged Congress passed a bill giving President Washington power to select with in certain limits a site on the Potomac Rl'er. Washing ton, Jefferson, Madison and Monroe, as Virginians, nat urally favored the southern location. The President's home was within a short distance of th! territory finally selected, and his Interest lu tho growth of tho city to which the Ci.'ninIssloners selected by hlin gave his name never flagged. Among the Frenchmen uho offered their services to the colonies during the struggl for Independence was Charles Pierre L'Enfant, who; commended himself to General Washington by his zc.il whllo serving as major of engineers. Maps nud pictures were carefully studied, the woods then covering the fdto of the city gone over, a design formulated and adopted. On a gridiron plan of streets, numbered and lettered, the French engineer superimposed two systems of avenues, radiating like spokes of a wheel from the cnpltol and executive niau bion.' The formal transfer of the government from Philadelphia-to Washington took place in October, 1S00. The Forgive, O Lonl, our severing ways, The separate Altars that we raise, The varying tuugues that speak Thy praitro ! Suffice it now. In time to he Shall one great temple rise to Tlicp, Thy church our broad humanity. WhHe flowers of love its walls climb, fhnll Sweet belli of peace shall ring Its days shall all be holy time its chime, The hymn, long sought, shall then b heard, The music of tlie world's accord, Confessing Christ, tho inward word! That song shall swell from shore to shore, One faith, one love, one hope restore The seamless garb that Jesus wore! John G. Whittier. Breaking If Gently Tho niesenger boy waited whllo Jack Powers wrote his answer to Her note. She might have telephoned, but it was Her way to send messengers with her personal missives. "Very well. Kathleen," wrote Jack, "I'll be there. You say for the lust time. I wonder why?" He sent a boy with this note nnd an order on a florist for a box of violets, as the message's accompaniment, nnd then he turned to his work again. "I'm a beastly cad," cogitated Jack, "and that's what. Rut it must be done. For tho last time, she said. Terhaps she's heard. It would help things a lot if she had." He looked meditatively nt n photo graph which ho fished from a dark pig eonhole in his desk. "She's a mighty nice little thing," he said to himself, "but " And then he took another photo graph from an Inner pocket of his coat, and kissed It tenderly. "Violets !" Kathleen hurled hrr little nose in the purple fragrance and sniffed with satisfaction. "Jack always sends violets," she sail to no ouo in particular, though her maid sat near by sewing some luce on the dinner frtvk her mistress had bade her lay out for her to wear. Kathleen looked gloomily ukiii a tall vase or long-stemmed American beau ties that stood on the table. "That's the difference lu men. Law rence sends big beauties because they -ost money, and Jack sends violets be cause they're my favorite flower. Poor Jack! How can I break his heart for I suposo It will. You say for the last time. I wonder why? Helgho ! We urns take our medicine. Marie. P.eeause I prefer millions to love In a cottage -that's why. Hurry with the waist. Marie. I must not lv late my last dinner with Jack." "No, I didn't think we needed a cha peron lo-ulght. Jack." "Vh not to-night?" "Ih-eause. well -" "I'll tell you hvand by. Jack after the fish, iierbaps." "I. too, have Mimetl'.ng to te'J you, K nthleen." "Isn't it absurd. Jack, to say that love makes the world go reind?" askisi Kathleen. In her diplomatic feminine way, she had wished to lead up to the subject she had come to discus. "Of course It Is," he answnred, "when champagne - if one has eudtigh of It will do the same thing." "Salmon eh. Jack, do you remem SJ5 'i toivn t flm world ber how we trolled for salmon at Dei Monte last summer?" Did In; remember? He had to pat tho photograph in his pocket to for get. "I rend the other day," Kathleen wns saying, "that a girl who couldn't make up her mind between two lovers hasn't n mind worth making up." She looked at him from the corners of her eyes. Jack's face lighted up. Sho knew, then, and that was the mennii'g of her desire for n farewell dinner: How easy Is would be now to explain. Rut Kathleen was not waiting for an answer. "They say there's no skill In winning a game where one holds all the trumps. Rut in the game of hearts, Jack, suppose one held Just two. Don't you think It would be hard to know which to discard?" Eravot thought Jack. What a clev er little diplomat Kathleen Is! Rut she veered to the other side. "Isn't it nice, Jack, Just we two sit ting here like this?" oh, so tenderly. "Isn't it like old times?" Ho really couldn't help it one Tit tle kiss was nothing. There was a pause of some minutes, and then Kathleen Impetuously sprang to iter feet. "Don't, Jack, don't, or I won't b ablo to braco myself to the ordetl Don't look like that." Ho put his hand in his coat pocket. Yes, the photograph was there. Had he been untrue to Her? "I'm engaged engaged. JaeV said Kathleen, excitedly. "I'm going to marry Ijiwrence Smith, tho million aire. Oh, Jack, I never really thought yon cared why didn't you ask me years ago when I was u bud. It's l IX TUX YOIT BY-AN0-BT, JACK. ioo nue now ioo Hire, its going to lie n grand church wedding. He wanted It to be a quiet affair, but I " "Though It would be the last quiet day hod have, no doubt. n ny, jacK, x never know you to make such a wretched Joke before. High noon at St. Luke's June eighth. You'll be there?" "I'm afraid not. Kathleen I " "Oh, we can still be. friends. This Is the twentieth century, you know, ami jealousy Is out of date." "I know, but " "Oh, say we can bo friends still, Jack. I never could bear these stuf fy little apartments, the modern love In a cottage, it's much better this way, dear." "I know, Kathleen. Rut " "Oh, don't think I meant anything horrid. I'm not that kind of a iiiun, Jack. Rut l4iwrence likes you I think he wants you to be best man Will your "I'm awfully sorry, but I couldn't really." "lib. you must," pleaded Kathleen, "else you must know what peopW win suy." She looked at her watch. "I must go now," she said, "for we are going to a ball to-night. Promise me, Jack, that If Lawrence asks you, you will be bis liest man at our wed ding. Do It for mi', dear, won't you?" She gave hltu a good-by Lisa, to liiake her plea more profound. ' primitive conditions prevailing In the new capital fur nished rich material for the newspaper wits especially for lliose of the Northern nnd Eastern States. Tim cnfltoi was called "the palace In the wilderness" and P'nnpylvania avenue, the "great Serbotiian Eng." Since fJien heroes by hundreds of thousands have marched down the great avenue which wns a deep morass covered with elder bushes. John Adams was the first President to live in tho White House. That was the time when the cast room was used to dry the family washing. Whatever may be the occasional harkii.g back to the g.sid old days It is uot likely that Mrs. Tuft will envy the time when tlie wife of (lie second President of the United States had to worry about returning calls at great distances, In addition to sin Ii details as the se curing of firewood, necessary lamps and means of trans portation. While the White House to-day is not all that a modern architect would plan, it is not wholly unliva ble. The President's wife is not rciptired to worry about clothes drying. She is provided with a number of mod ern housekeeping conveniences and her lot is not such n burden ns to deter other women from envying her the position of first lady of the land. The new nation, rich as it was in undeveloped re sources, lacked ready funds. To secure money for the public edifices gifts and sales of land were required. Adams, Jefferson, Madison and Monroe ditl what they could for the city, but it developed slowly ,and though the primary features of L'Eufant's plan were preserved there were many departures from it. In December, 1900, the appointment of a park commission marked an epoch lu the development of Washington as a beautiful city. It did more than that, for though the pluus submitted by the commission have not been realized and, Indeed, It was not expected that they would be immediately the attention of the entire counry was aroused and the movement for tho betterment of other cities given im "Oh. the mischief, I can't, Kathleen," he said, squeezing her little bauds warmly. "I would if I could, yon know, hut it's Impossible." "Why, dear?" The words were warm, but the tone, was cold. "Well, I'll tell you I've tried to tell you all tlie evening, but you didn't give me a chance. I'm going to be mar ried myself that same day." Pounsyl' vnnia Grit. AN EARLY FLYING MACHINE. A SCOTCH MAX'S INVEXTIOX. Some twnty years ago a Scotch lax ventor devised tlie flying ninchine noVy being built, as shown In this illustra tion. At that time aerial navigation was considered nothing more than ii wild dream of crazy inventors. It 1 known as a gyropter, nnd has two umbrella-like lifters or propellers wblcji' whirl. Tho skeleton of tho body, anj framework which supports tho lifters, have yet to be covered in. ropulai? Mechanics. HIS UMBHELLA. It Va (he (niiKo of Alrli iB- Famtl Seercln in I'ulillc. A young man was riding in an omnU bus. He took the corner scat and held. In his hand nu umbrella which had! been given him ns a birthday presonjt. On the seat facing bitn was a lad with a precocious boy, evidently about five years old. Tho youngster regarded the younjf man with attention for a few moments, ' and then his eyes wandered to the umbrella. He gazed at it in silence fof a second ; then be wriggled in Ills seat, clapped his hands nnd shouted: "Oh, mamma, don't that look like pa. pa's umbrella?" "Hush, hush, my child:" said tho mother, patting the prodigy on the head. f "Papa was looking for his umbrella this morning, mamma," contiuued th child wonder. , "Yes, yes, but he found It," said the mother hurriedly, as the conversation was becoming of Interest to tho occu pants of the seats. "Why, mamina," continued the youngster, "you know he didn't You told him that he didn't know enough, to keep an umbrella. Why, mamma" At this stage the small boy was car ried howling from the bus. Pearsou'a Weekly. The Orivln of Mlii-ralilt JoUr. Confucius had Just met William Penn at one of Cleopatra's! flve-o'cloclt teas. "William Penn?" he said. "William Penn? Seems to me I have heard of you, sir." "Yes?" pjihl Penn. with a pleasett smile. "I am the man who wus mightier than the sword." "All, yes," said Confucius. "Yori are also the man who invented sleep, ari you not?" "No," said Penn, "I founded Phila delphia." 'Oh. yes," said Confucius. "I kne-,V it was something of that kind." Suci ( ess Magazine. "It worries me terribly," wa heard a very neat woman say recently, "to think that, after fighting dirt aH my life, I have to turn to dirt when If die." A woman Is really In a hurry If bf sayi good-by that way. ' "