The Wolf
by bansone
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Cifr^ >M1 kf Umm Immm
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He does everything so well1
At almost any time of the
day, one may walk into the
garage office and watch a
bevy of females scurrying
over a flock of green cards.
Presiding over this group is
“Figure-Callin’ ” Wiggins and
the activity in general is af
fectionately referred to as
“Mr. Wiggins and his Cabbage
Batch.”
It has never been made en
tirely clear, however, as to
whether this cabbage nomen
clature has reference to the
green cards or the shape of
the stenographers’ heads.
At any rate, O. L. Herman,
S2c, has recently won a berth
(notice the spelling) in the
Hither, Thither, and Yawn
Ensign D. R. Moore, bless his little heart,
is becoming a connoisseur in the art of knit
ting and the correct method of holding the
yarn during the ball-rolling process. For fur
ther information, appointments and consulta
tions may be made from 0800 to 1680. Eve
ning appointments are unavailable at pres
ent.
• * *
Ensign Kvam was in Lincoln not long ago, and
being a stranger there himself, he asked a couple of
girls if the University Club was in one of those two
tall buildings—pointing to two six-story jobs down
the street. Apparently Beldingham, Wash., grows
only close-to-thc-ground structures, Gil.
First thing you know, the Inert Storage
section will be organizing a ladies’ bridge
club. The boys in that outfit now have two
bowling teams in one of the Hastings leagues,
and their basketball team is just getting un
derway. Among those huskies who wrestles
boxes, Bob Mitchell should be able to find an
honest-to-goodness rassler, too. Prospective
employes should ask for assignment to Inert
Storage.
* « *
Sic Kurowski of the pay office says: if a man
runs after money, he’s money-mad; if he keeps it,
he’s a capitalist; if he spends it, he’s a play-boy; if he
doesn’t get it, he’s a ne’er-do-well; if he doesn’t try
to get it, he lacks ambition; and if he accumulates
it after a lifetime of hard work, people call him a
fool who never got anything out of life.
Kenneth Hoerr (pronounced Hare), S2c, of Pe
kin, 111., lives up to the name of his home town, for
his duty as sentry is to peek at badges.
In appreciation of efforts made by the
Depot for their comfort. Prairie Village resi
dents have set up a record of 100% on the
job. No one stays away from production un
less he if* authorized by sick bay to stay in
bed.
Lt. (jg) H. Kibbee I’orter of San Antonio, when
he wasn’t specializing as a trackster at the Univer
sity of Texas, was learning some of the line points
of drinks, from frog toddy to the Texas cocktail.
Here is a recipe for the latter, gleaned from watch
ing bartenders: They take whiskey to make it strong,
then water to make it weak, gin to make it hot, and ice
to make it cold, lemon to make it sour, sugar to
make it sweet. Then they say: "Here’s to you!”
And then they drink it themselves. Those Texans!
Joe Henry Schneider of Grand Island, SC 3c
(Butcher), had to convince his wife-to-be that he
knew the language of butchers by proposing in the
“language of meats.” He did it like this: “Oh, could
I reveal, when 1 meat your eyes of blue, I’d be a liv
er in the lights of them in a style beef-fitting you.
I never sausage a pretty girl and when my lamb
I spy, I’d be satisfied to steak my bones in lard
enough to fry. I’m bacon around the heart, oh love
of tenderloins, I’m full; so be my little spare rib
lamb, or else cut out the bull.” P. S. He convinced
her.
“Cabbage.” At present he is
called “Lucky Boy” Herman,
but if those women become
too much for him, he may be
called “Herman the Hermit.”
* * *
Ed Mariska, in the Maintenance
Department, has been making a
name for himself ... he is now
known as “Alibi” Mariska, or
“Faultless Ed.”
Roy (Pantless) Carriker is
now Hatless Carriker, for he
is mourning the passing of his
beautiful new dress hat. While
he was swinging to the boogie
woogie of Gladys Palmer and
the Cats and the Fiddle Sun
day evening, his precious hat
disappeared, even with h i s
name on it. If the hat, taken
inadvertently or otherwise, is
returned to some location
where it can be claimed by
said Hatless Carriker, he will
be most grateful, and no ques
tions will be asked. His head
is chilly, he says.
This Wolf Lott (better known as
“Vacant” or “Empty”) certainly
didn’t waste a second in fretting
back in the groove after 10 days’
leave on the sunny shores of Cali
fornia. It seems that a sister of
one of our officers has been the ob
ject of his attentions. Seeing that
she is also from Los Angeles, they
must have much in common.
* * *
Wonder if Dixie Davis is on the
right “road to Berlin”. She cer
tainly has had a variety of escorts
these past few weekends, Dixie. 1)<>
you operate in between weekends?
Now that Lt. (the Kid)
Klose has his purring little
jOldsmobile (made of ersatz
materials), he can make plen
ty of tracks towards Sutton
where dwells a “LILLIE’*
that’s really a “DOLL”.
* * *
Bob Wascher says that the new
| sitting room in the B. O. Q. is maJe
to order for relaxation and a few
other types of parlor activities.
* » *
In an interview with Private
Walker of the Women’s Army
Corps, the pantless, hatless
recreation officer before the
boogie-woogie show Sunday
discovered that Miss Walker
enjoyed life as a WAAC, then
a WAC, but she hopes soon to
be a WIFE.