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hoi st: wiTiiotT ciiiLiiti:3. "To let, part of a house, where there are no children, to a neat Americ/ui family without••hildrci). Apply il 't." I i i n i n i o o n n u A lions** without children. 1 i• \wuever ob serve it I-a •.-.li.ito mansion overshadowed by lootii Its loin', silent chambers re-echo your foot steps. i And shadowy specters flit oft through your room. There il\ -'. psia is rampant, the biu«-s tIn-\ assail you, And iroiiuies crowd thickly of like "kith and kin: There the chaise of the doctor is often seeti standing, A nd erapc oil the knoeker tells nf Mirmw within. A house without children, pray don't ad vert.ise it Keep the street ami the number a ^cavt. my friend: Let the cloek tick in silence ihe few tli in^c moments You have vet in your lonely apartments to spend. wonder if an v I one knows of a dwelling Where the neighbors would like to hear voices of ylee* could liriiiji Ihcin, I'm sure, in our Mabel and Annie. Delightful companions, if they'll notify mo. For the sun breaks upon them the first in the morniuK, Aud the birds they love dearly to come dav by day And pick up the crumbs which their little hand- scatter. When, bounding with life, they run out to play. Does any mm know of any such dwelling? It needs must be small for our means are not large. Where the landlord. Hod bless him! o e u v o I i i i Will throw in the rent at a nominal charge. -I n y S W a s u n IIUMOK OF Til 12 DAY. The Way of the World. "le man who expeeks leas' of de world am do one who }ias do fewest complaints," said the old man. as the Hound of rattling hoofs died away iu the hall. "le man who imagines dat friendship will borrow money at de bank am doomed to disappointment. My frien' may leu* me his hovel, but he expects me to return his hoe iu good eondishun. lie may inquar' arter my wife's health, but it doan' follcr dat 1 kin turn my chickens into his garden. If I am sick. I doan' expeek de worl' to stop niovin' right long. If my tiex' nay bur whispers to my wife dat he am willin' to sot tip wid my corpse, he am doin' his full duty, if I am iu want, dat's nulliti to de people who have plenty. If I am in trouble dat's nulliti to people who have sunthiii" to rejoice ober. De worl' owes me only-what I can airn. It owes me room to pass to and fro. space for a grave, an' sich a funeral as de ole woman kin pay fur an' keep de bin full o' taters. l)e worl's friendship reduces a man to rags as often as it clothes him in fine raiment. De worl's sympathy blister a man's back as often as it warms his heart. De worl's charity excuses de I •crime of a hoss thief an' am horror stricken ober de stealin' of a loaf of bread bv an orphan. The world promises everylhiu" an1 performs only what am convenient. De man who relies on de honesty of de public iustead of dc vigilance of de watch- i dog will have no harvest apples for sale. De man who pauses at each stage of his career fur de world to applaud or condemn will become a football for all men to kick. Kxpcck no friendship to las' beyond the momen" when you want help. Kxpcck no sympathy to endure longer dan it takes fur tears to dry. Kxpi no praise from men in de same trade. We will now continuate towards de usual programmy of business.De troit Five Press. Jluyliij* Some Ancestors. The Detroit Free Press gives a sample of purse-proud ignorance and its ques tions and answers: u IIave you any second-hand ances tors for sale?" asked a gaudily-dressed woman with a shrill voice, of a well known art-dealer on Woodward Aven ue. "Ancestors?" echoed the bewildered man "I don't think I quite understand yon." "Don't catch on, hey? You must be as stupid as you look, then but it's hard to believe. I've got a new house audit's all lived up and furnished tip top, and now I want to buy some an cestors to hang in it.*' "I'm sorry ma'am," explained the dealer, eivily, "but all my ancestors are hung. Here's a Holy' Family, by Murillo, I will sell vou cheap if it will suite." Thank you. I dou't want another family one fanily in a house is enough. If y ou've got an aboriginal by Chromo Idunnobut I might take it: but there's a heap more style in a gallery of ances tors, and I'll look around. The last seen of her she was punch ing the eyes of "A protrait of a lady." in oil, with her parasole at another art store, and asking the dazed clerk, "What is that woman worth? What a Small Itoy lti«| WithaXicknl, Two little Upper Main street boys in akirts are laying siege to the heart of a wee damsel who sits on the front seal nt the primary school, and who is div iding her attention between both of her admirers, who are dead in love. A funny thing was that which one of them 1 papa ga\e food bov. did one day thif Week, lli' him a nickel for being a He didn't buv candy, although that wa the original plea b\* which he obtained the nickel. Not at all. JIc went over po«t haste io the abode of hi.-little lady and gave her the money on condition that she would hold his and his hand alone oil thewav to school the next day. The trade was 'struck, ami the next morning th* \vu* ciuiiiy** out. The fond mother of the little Mis saw. as the result of this secret Iran action, otic tearful little boy iu a blue blouse waist and skirt weeping bitter tears over the front yard fence, while down the street, in proud conscious ness of having euehered a dreaded rival, marched the other boy hand iu hand with the little girl, Both were called back, and it was a less joyous trio that next went up the street. The lather ha- great hopes of his boy who struck up the bargain.--LewUtoii(Me.)Jour nal. A n O v i e a e u k e y s W. F. Shuman has been bothered by wild turkeys. They have (teen system atically entering his cornfield for some time past and destroying the budding corn. Under the game law of the country he could not shoot them, but he found where they came in and out. and one day he slipped round aud set up some umbrella ribs in their path. Slipping back he shot of! his gun and shouted to give them a fright. His plan succeeded. They ran at a great speed to get away, aud four out of tive in the bunch killed themselves against the ribs.-—Vahlost a ia.)Times. The K*asm She iv« for lit 'oig I.ate. Tin- principal of the Young Ladies Academy, of the north .side, wished to know of one of the class why she was late. "My beau slew me last night quite late and I was tardy in arriving this a. in.," giggled the coming woman. "Do you mean that you were out sleighing:'" "1 was not slain, if you please. Present, slay: past, slain: past perfect, slew. What he did is past, and you bet it was perfect." "What an incorrigible you are," said the poor distracted teacher. "He said I was a daisy," replied the miss throwing a piece of chewing gum to the ceiling aud catching it in her mouth as it fell.—Chicago Herald-.' All Sorts. Prof. John Stuart Blaekie. who has just resigned the (ireek Professorship in. the University of Edinburgh. which he lies occupied for thirty years, was a great favorite of the students. It Is related that. once, on the first day of the college year, he posted on his class-:, room door a notice that "Professor I Blaekie will meet his classes, on i the 4th inst., at the usual hours." A I joker among the students erased the "e" in "classes" Ihus announcing that. the Professor would "meet his lasses," etc. As class-time drew near, the young men gathered about, to "see what Blaekie would do." The Profes sor came, glanced at the card, touched it with a pencil, ami passed on to his his desk, a smile overspread ing his features. The students followed him into the room, with mingled emotions of jollitv and dis may, when they saw that his deft pen cil-stroke had obliterated the "1," leaving the announcement that Pro feMr Blaekie would "meet his asses,"' at the usual hour. An Irish woman entered one of the National Banks in Providence the other day. and presented a check at the cash ier s desk. The cashier looked at her and said, politely: "Madame, vou must £et identified.*" Faith. an, what's k that?" "Why, you see, you* are a stranger to me. I don't know you." "Will thin, I'm proud to introjuce me silf to ye/. My name's Sarv MacFlinn, an I'm not ashamed of it!" "Well, but you see I cannot tell whether you are tlu^ person whose name is on the. check, said the cashier, too polite to tell her that perhaps she was King about it. "An what did ye sav I must do?" "Identify yourself!" Bring some one here that knows you." "Indade! An' who knows me better than I know inesiif?" The cashier paid the check without another word. A museum of relics collected by Mr, D. \V. Sawyer, cashier of a bank at Boothbay, Maine, contains, amoni? other curious things, a piece of worm eaten plank found in a codfish, and a watch-chain taken from a cod on the Banks. A brown jug in the collection has this curious fish story. One of the crew of the schooner Willie (}., at Southport, accidently broke the handle from a jug and th'rew it overboard. Four weeks afterwards, in that locality, while cleaning a eodiUh just drawn in, the fisherman exclaimed: Will, by gracious now, if I don't believe tha*t hen's the handle of my jug aud, sure enough, the piece found in the cod tit ted completely, aud both are here to verify it. Keceutly jVI, Bartholdi, the designer of the colossal statue of "Liberty^En lightening the world," which is 'to be erected in New York harbor, enter tained a party of friends in Paris at luncheon. Tim table was laid iu the lower folds of the drapery of the figure. The weight of the figure will be !.".( Uons, ami the height from head to foot aboilt 110 feet, and from the end of the torch raised in the right hand to the feet 140 feet. "1 he fiict is," said a tramp, "i have read so much about the troubles in the labor markel, that I am heartily sick of the whole business and I made up my mind long ago that 1 would never have anything to do with labor. 1 ne\ er forsake* work: but if you hot a As I am a man wno principles, I canuot have a nice rare r'ofl'ce about the preini leu moments to their demolition. steak ami cup of I'll devote The onlv application of the eal term, a -dispensation of Provideiic that 1 ever heard marks Fanny it pleasure, re- i •,,!({ Kemble in her "Kcini ••was that of the devout o: niscences. "was in.u u. Scotch ladv who -aid. 'Heclu sirs. I never wearv of reflecting n g'"' otis dispensations of Pro\ ldeiicctow aid nivself and its righteous judgments oil my neighbor*! They were talking o\er ntu-ic at the ttlbic of their luM, who, as they were alrcadv well aware, owed lus fortune to his own unaided exertion-.. l, u never There is a gre, present season pat roni/ed the man: have shaxed myself for the last forty years." -careity of water i in France and many. The le\el of t|e Seitu never been so o w since i which fell last wiutei half he usual quantity of the city of Pari ment are trying The rain did not reach The engineers and the Govern to 1ind protection against such scarcity in time to come. One Sunday evening the Rev. Mr. B., preached from the text, wliv pcrsecutest thou liu congregation there was au driver, named Saul, who was accompa nied by his wife ami little girl. reverend gentleman repealed hi several limes: "Saul, Saul, pcrsecutc.st thou me?" At last the daughter of Saul thinking that the text had a personal application, looked up in the face ot her father and .said: box, "Don't mind him, father: he has been h:m* drinking." i '''m- •Stud, Saul. Ill the •enirine- o' Thc text win A man who happened to be in a illume when it was plundered by French sol- tliers, many of whom wore upon their brea.sts the cross of the Legion of Hon I or. made the remark, contidential to himself, however: "Formerly they Used to hamr lie thieves op the cross. I but now they hatiLT the crosses on the thieves." i Mr. Caine. M. P. for Scarborough, tells a good story of how some time ago i he met a Scotchman in the Lake di trie! of England, who told him he was i on his honey-moon trip. Inquiries I naturally enough were made as to where his young wife was, when he replied that he had left her in Paisley A Dutchman was relating hismarvel oils escape from drow ning when I thirteen of his companion* were lost by I the upsetting of a boat, and he {done was saved. "And how did you escape their fate?" asked one of his heart r-. "1 lid not co in te pole," was the Dutchman's placid answer. At a wedding recently, when the! I oilieiating clergy man pus to the ladv the question. "Wilt thou have this man] I to be thy wedded husband? she drop-] I ped the prettiest courtesy, and with a modesty which lent her beauty an ad diiional grace, replied, "If you please." i A miller fell asleep in his mill, and I bent forward till his hair got caught I in some machinery, and almost a i handful was pulled out. Of course it awakened him. and his tirst bewildered [exclamation was "Hang it, wife,} what's the matter now?" It is said that "about the year 17% there was ottered as a gift to a Lutheran church in New York city six acres of land, near('anal street and Broadway* and it wasdecliued. as not being worth fencing."1 I hat was a philosophical voting clerk, the Lowell Citizen quolcs as saying that, half a loaf was better than losing his position. It who loafs altogether bread. When two murderers were, sentenced one to imprisionnient for life and the other to be hanged Patrick remarked that he didii "belave either av them wild live out, his sintince." hat! only live policemen for a town like this?" exclaimed a traveller. "Oh," replied the native calmly, "they ha\ i' no difliculty iu keeping what little peace we have It costs the United Slates a little more than, IH.imkj a yearto tire the sun ris,» and sunset guiis nt the several military and naval .stations, A little girl on being told that an older sister was onlv a half sister, mournfully asked: "When will she be my w hole sister?" A farmer in Travis advertises for "an industrious man to take, charge of five thousand sheep, w ho can "talk Spanish." 1 The nu io'st «':iliin I.atly. i riio richest lady in Washington now, says The Boston Courier, probably is Mrs. hitney, whose husband is secre tary of the navy and whose father is the millionaire Senator Pavne of Ohio ft is said that one of her brothers ir i VVe I hct a cool million within a year or two, 1 and as a 1 rilling Christmas gift ive her a !{lo,io() ornament of rubies. The diamonds she wore -at her first Wednes day reception iu ashingloti wcri- very i '"fft'^ind brilliant. Her earrino's c»f solitaire diamonds and the three^soli taiies which were set in her breastpin are unusually large and pure. Baron Albert (irant's two marble staircases, with their lower lnndin-s supported by caryatides representii?f the seasons, and for which a few years ago lie is declared to have paid .^.OOO i sold at the auction a fortnight a.r0 in Kensington for $5,000, and the pnr chaser of them was-Mme. Tusbaud' «150V WANTKP. People laughed when they saw the sim again. seemed to be alway s n r's window. For a day or two. for only an hour or two, it would be missing, ami pa-er-hy would wonder whether Mr. lVter had Mr. Pel sometime ,-h at last found :i 1 sooner later, Mlii nK ,nlt siir appear :Urain. -Wha1 anyway. "U and then they that tliev supp ,ov. Miid in their opinion nk a good while before lie want, would :is|\. each tier, ooking for he he of-.a .-hoy do and another would say to ised he wa a perfect would loo I found one i not plenty dozen med sometimes course ol a morning situation. Mr. Peters was s 1,t' fond of Hossiui?" a-ked one ot the •nic-ts. "Passionately," replies the host. "Knows his -Barber?' "No, sir, I do not i) i Not that there wen of bo\ s as many si** to appear in tin trying for tht try to fellow to easy work the w:tv they (ier has 1 It wa.s towards the middle of the af ternoon that he was sent up to the at I if. a dark, dingy place, inhabited by mice and cibwebs, "You w ill lind a longdeep box there." said Mr. Peters, "that I want to hat pin in order. Jt stands rijrht in ihe middle of the room, you can't miss ii." John looked doleful. "A lollg deep 1 should think it wa.s!" he told •If. as the attic door closed after "It would weiirh most a ton I iruess and -what is there in it? Noth ing iu the world but. old nails, and screw keys and thin,., it! Nothing worth touching.and it as dark as a pocket up here, and cold, besides how the wind blows in through those knot-holes! "I here s a mouse! If there's any thinir I hate it's mice! I'll tell you what il is. if ol 1 Peters thinks I'm ^oing to stay up here and tumble over his rusty nails, he's much mistak en. I wasn't hired for that kind of work." and pieces of iron, and broken 1 things rubbisli, the whole of Whereupon John boimecd down tlm attic stairs, ihree at a time, and was found hr.inginir in he show w'.ndowh:i!f an hour afterw ard-. when Mr. Peter appeareil. "Have you put that box in order ai reaoy?" was the gentleman's questi,,n. "1 didn't find aiiythiiiLT to put in or i der: there was nothing ii luit na:! and things." "Lxactly it was the -miilsand thin::-" that I wanted put iu order: did you But he siuiled pleasantly enough, and nt once gave John an erranddododown town, and the boy went .oil' chuckling, declaring to himself that he knew how i to manage the old fellow all it needed was a little standing up for vourrights. Precisely at six o'clock John was (called and paid the sum promised him for a day's work, and then, to his dis may. he Wits told that his services would not be needed any more. He asked no quest ions indeed he had time for none, as Mr. Peters immediately closed the door." The next morning the old sigti. Bov anted" appeared in its usual [dace. Before noon it was taken down, and Charlie Jones wa the fortunate bov. is the fellow Krrands, plenty of them: lie was kept that gets no busy until within an hour of dosing. i'l hen, behold ho was sent to the attic to put the long box in order, tie was not afraid of a luou^e. nor of the cold, but he grumbled much over that box nothing in it worth his attention. How ever he tumbled over I lie things, grow l ing all the time, picked out 7i few stiaight nails, a key or two, and finally appeared down stairs with this message: "Here's all there is Worth keepiucMn that old box: the rest of the ru.sly, and the old hooks are bent, or sotnet h'tig. "Very well," said Mr. Peters, and sent him to the post office." What do you think? By the close „f the next Charlie had been paid and dis charged, and the old sign hung in the window. "I ve ,H) kind of a Sl11- ml to-morrow morniiu.'?"" he was putting the .rj.i1""'.' pocket-book. After good night and the lantern and went*!] attic stair.-. There w box in which the rubbish"'i' li\e y ear had irat had evidently been to ti„. i he had titled in to make eoniiiartmcy^^ these dill'crent pla.-ed the ailieles, laid oil tojt and ihc|..l serews." "Pretty ui t1 ua i! s. "Hiiutll u what I., nt. •Tictu!v],U(-k(: of iron wiio.se Use I don't on through the Ioiilt 1 order it was that could rea)'\ to be found wit :is he bent o\ er laughed gleeful^ the mice: "If wt I have found a a fortune." i, to be rich ami qu er. and for one or both ot these reasons. bo\* were auxioii-- io suit him. '"All he wants i- a run of errands it must be and sure p:iy." Hiis was alked to each other. But Mr. Peters wanted more than a bov to run of errand*. John Simmons found that out, and this was tnc v\ ay he did it. He had been engaged that very morninur, and had been kept busy all'the forenoon, at pleasant enough work, and although he was a la/y fellow, he rather enjoyed the place. Of lj i"b nm{ Vl C.'lllctl 1J Hut Mr alld ft-aii V and iijun are in,t |itln Sure enough: from I he wind. more. Crawfoi know n errand bov of t| iV o. He had a Iiti! S 'P di tml wa •('(•ante tira ftX)J titled up. next to tlit- attir. spent his e\eniiigs. nini nt ft the bed hunga motto vvhicij gjivc him. "It tells y(,nr in you, don't forget it." he handed it to Crawford lauglied and read it eur'nm-h. is faithful iu that which v faithful also in tutieh." sir," he said: mid .. thought of the Ion.- i•• had been faithful. All this happened ycarsaju ford Mills is errand huy Dot the firm is Pe:e[-. Mil of rubbish laughing. 'old piece i.at one of 4 young man and rich nii found his fortune in a loii" Mr. IWrn's Never was a si -1if cessful in ii rt'eit, it i Him 1 it.' Then of si] didtf Bible, whiei It is .and l'atis\ irruvplv: i: in liii.:: faitlifru i.ful .alsui •II e ill ast. MiHs iV W M: Tin. Cup!aiii's Story. Mv a|)ta in V. •ker. friend, met it af' er a pleasant e 5 it },,• a- Would like to be i m:i^' i _r formed him that I did nut yearn for -,|) w k Up there, anv thiti'' w Ml ll I i. sir, it: was dai and 1 didn't, -ee doing: besides, 1 thought" I was hired to run of errands." 1 "Oh," said Mr. Peters, "1 t.Ii.oiighl you were hired to do as vou were told," notion why I was discharged." grumbled Charlie to his mother "he .said he had no fault to hud, only he saw that 1 wouldn't suit It S my opinion he doesn't want a hoy at »'"'M»kes that way to cheat. jViiNiU oM tellnw. It was Crawford Mills who was hired m'xt. lie knew neither of the other boys, ami so did his errands in blissful ignorance of the* "long box" until the sec,mi,I morning of his stay, when in a hMsiirehourhewas sent to put it inor ,""'('"nig J'assed, dinner time Mtne, and still Crawford had not ap i r/ (!U! aUii At i^-t MV. I etcr.s called him, "(kit through?" to dr.""S,r' 'S !V,'r s nt tilt niU('^ .I' er a' !!.: year. "Wi !1. y iii «.!i "the aceolin! I !'i mind iiu' of :-n iitiire he river o^r We was l'li 11:. I' I he schoi itler a ry y ear let me mt iit W'v was loaded w.:!i lolassi' f'*r he traders on he ri\ er. f: in 1!. Kinnii. J" good run until we got ahuiit from Seguin, when the winds the sou'east and blew i i hanl. I you it kicked up a high .seaitr We lay oil' on Seguin ill ran for the mouth of the river light. Kver been to .ScgUill:'k- i iiig how I he w a eullll' Wal, they ran tio 1 in', right into •t high t.ha ihe'.'. rive. was -ft -1 s-wtraf ..ged 3 _(oiitoalwlp1 sir, them wave for us and w e 1 ami I'll lie han i didn't 1 hrow us iq high and dry! I thought wo' ers, and threw olV my i sea heub for it. next wave. Slaps!"'''" thunder and gun-! carries u i deep water. I see theni tit'*V mine sucked under just a» the rocks. As soon a we W1' in the river again, we loiitnl leakin* like fun, -o tin* 'Boy s, we' II ground her at lhiR so for tlie beach we put, l11"11 all the way over, l! was hijl1' we went pretty fur up before*' bottom, but biiuchyshe did. ai I she stuck till the tide IIIII "tl1 her out on lie dry laud. 1"' feelitf pretty bad about ll" boots w hen I looks over the there wit.hin :t stone s throw boots together ou the that. down her side, went and got wore 'em steady f(»r tlie next tn That sjilt water seemed toil" Seemed sorter lucky that uk'| should have floated uj with 11* though." Lewis!on Journal.- "lore, "Ail right it is dinner lira© now: you can go back after dinner ttlter inner back he went all the short ust'r'M1 I. Was 0l h, u, ,, ^ro,n» but just as Mr. I ctcrs was deciding to call luin again, he appeared. 19 "I'ved.uiemy hest, sir,"hesaid, "and dovMi very bottom of the box I found this. "This" was iv i ti gold piece. dollar That's a queer place for gold," said Mr. Pet'rs. welt i.. |S" •Vou fo SitlleriiiK iiUH'l** Tlie lmirclies of Stewart going to and fro of which many of flu occasionally four and six water and food, except tin' oiivo.v l^r like sabas grass growing u desert, told fatally upon h""' the poor brutes. The gone out of thr survivors,J traded rest was necessary feeling for all of them. admit fed of neither, and gaping wounds ami terrible packs and girths, the wreU'ht't continued to be driven aw ful aflluviii, noxious as a P( exh.aled from the wound* miseralile animals, anil h:is tilled the air wherever a tin' U'l' ('anll marches. 1 say nothing from he count less dead v.'( line the route from Abu ru Even as I write the odor from of these lying outside the rii (lakdnl makes the :qlr,a(('J!lli: phiee :i sort of running smells insuileriible. [(Jakul don Standard.] «nd it hi, I suppose nou will be mtMmH