A FOOLISH .WISH. •Ton have beard, "a(d a yoath to hl« bit wit hout, who stood bo »»t on a corn-shoaf at daylight's do dine— •Ton bar* beard of the Danish boy's whistle of wood the Danish boy's whistle were rain#.* •ind wh»i would yoa do with it? Tell me," sbo said, Whflo en arch smilo played o'er her beautiful face. •r irould blow It," lio answored, "and then my fair mall Would fly to my side and wonld thero take her pluco."' •la that all you wished for? Why that my be yours Without any maglo I" the fair mai.lun eriod "A favor bo slight one's good nature hoc urea." And sbo playfully seated herself by hiB side. •I would blow it again," said the youth, and the charm Would work so that not oven modesty's chock Would be able to keep from my neck your white arm," She smiled mid she laid her whlto arm around lils nock. "Vet onco more would I blow, and the rausio dlvino Would bring mo a third time an oxqulsite bliss, And would i«y your fair choek to this brown one of initio, And your lips stoallng past it would give mo a kiss." The moldon laughed out In her innoccnt glee— •What a fool of yourself with the whistle you'd make 1 "or only oonsider liow silly 'twould bo To sit there and whistle for what you might take." •ItehobolhSundaif BeraUl. THE SCHOOLMA'AM OF WOLF PRAIRIE. BY At) H. GIllSON. The purple glamour of a lovely In dian summer enwrapped the landscape ami socmed to leud an especial glory to Ibo rich vegotation that made Wolf l'rairie, in Southern Kansas, in its semi-unsettled days, oven at that late season, so inviting and thoroughly de lightful to the Eastern-bred family of Thomas Gaylor. The Gaylor family had come all the way from Now York in a covered wagon that fall. Tlioy wero in search of land in the West, and notwithstand ing tho unpleasant roports they fre quently heard of Indians in the neigh borhood of Wolf Prairie, as that baau -tiful stretch of rich prairie land had been, seemingly, inappropriately named, Thomas Ciaylor had concluded to settle thereou, upon a certain por tion of its billowy surface, at loast, that had particularly taken his eye. The Gaylor family consisted of Thomas, his wife, and an only child, Valley, as sho was named, a yonng lady of 17. Tliomas was a big, honest, hard working Yankee farmer of more than ordinary energy. With tho help of a neighbor he soon had a ^ory comfort able log cabin erectcd on his Western claim, into which the family were fain to move themselves and their be longings after a long residence under canvas. Mrs. Gaylor was a busy, careful housewife, whom the Kansas winds pro voked not a little, driving the dust of the sandy road into tho cabin and sift ing it into tho most seorot and eaored places. But Valley was not one to be wor ried by the gales oi her Western home nor, indeed, did she allow anything to worry her. Hers was a cheery, snn •I«uy temperament, ever seeking the bright side whore others beheld a som ber one. But she could be very Arm, too, as you might judge from the cast of. her pretty mouth and snowy chin. Her dark eyes announced more plainly to an observer than words would have done that she meant just what she said and aimed-to execute whatever she set hor heart to do, so long as her better judgment approved the step. Imbued with tho same spirit of industry that characterized both her parents. Valley Gaylor determined to be as small a burden to them in their new home as possible. Accordingly, hearing that the Wolf Prairie School was in want of a teacher for the winter term, Valley put on her bonnet and gloves, and sot out to see the board of trustees. Valley had beon well educated in the East, but she had nover taught school. Sho had no fears but that she could govern tho school and instruct its pnpils, too, she informed the board, when she had tendered them her oral application for tho position and thoy had Bpoken rather doubtfully with regard to a young, inexperienced girl like her managing the rude urchins of Wolf Prairio. Valley's self-confidence carried the day for her. Sho was en gaged to teach tho school at $45 per mouth and board furnished iter at Jacob Hancock's during the bad weather. At other times, or when the walking was good, .Valley preferred to walk over threo miles home, rather .ttan put up with the Hancock family, who lived but one milo from the school house, although .Taoob Hancock as sured her of a cordial welcome to stay with them throughout the entire term. "Wifo an' nio'll bo mighty glad to Jiev ye board along with us. Our ranch is on'y a mild frum tho skulohouso, which's light over yander on thet thar little rise in the purarie," Hancock said. School opened on Monday. On Sun day evening Mr. Gaylor took Valley over to Jacob Hancock's, with his mule team, so she might get an'earlier start on the first diy of school, than if she walked from her home. "They're a passal o' toughuns, Miss," said Jacob Hancock, before Valley had left for school next morning. "Yes an'a quarrelin'er set ye never seed, I know," put in the voice of Mrs. Hancock. "Oh! ye'll hev yer hands full with 'om, Miss. Now of I was teacher o' the Wolf l'urario skule I'd jes about churn tho daylights outen some uv 'em," and she wagged her head very emphatically. "I do hope ye won't hev any trouble with 'em but they're so pesky, all-fired rough an' heathenish livin' out hyar erniong tho Injuns with little or no skulin' tor speak on fur so long a spell, I'm kinder fear'd fur ye, Miss. But toy yor hand. Ye kin lick mine like sin ef they don't mind ye," were tbo part ing words of HancocJc as Volley took op her lunch and started across the hazy prairie. Sho found the school honse a rough struoture. It had been Hade of green lnmber which the fervid Bun °f several Kansas summers had warped and shrunken until the boards *ere an inoh and a half apart in places, aUowfcg ample ventilation. The floor little better. The windows were slits in the walls, two on each side, and covered with canvas whioh had been tacked to a rude framework, all four of which coverings were loose now and creaking dismally in the high autumn blasts. Tho door was swinging on its rusty hinges. Tho place had a decid edly open look. A very 'open' reception is accorded me, that is certain," said Valley, step ping in and surveying the interior of her temple of learning out on Wolf Prairie. A smile hovered oyer her lips she stationed herself at her desk, which proved to be an ungainly big Jry-gooda box. "Gentlemen of leisure about town are said to find much pleas ure in them as seais, but I hardly be lieve I shall enjoy the use of one as a desk. However, I'll make the best of the dry-goods.box until I draw my first month's salary, thou we shall behold some public improvements." Valley's adaptability to circumstances helped her overoome all discourage ments she might otherwise have felt over the novel arraugments of hor school-room. Jacob Hancock's numerous children "took a powerful likin'" to Valley, as Mrs. H. informed her after one week of school had passed. Jake, tho eldest, a robust fellow of 18, had told Valley of tho experi ence of their last teacher, who had been forced "to git up an* hustle," by the largest scholar of Wolf Prairie, Bill Warren, who, in the language of the elder Hancock, was "a holy terror an' always run the skule." "Bill always goes armed," saidvoung Jake. "The| other boys will all mind ye but him. .He rules the roost at home and everybody is as 'fraid of him as of the Old Scratch. He's goin' on fur twenty, and bigger than my pap. But rough as Bill is, he'll hardly abuso a woman, I 'low." "It is to bo hoped ho is to mauly to do that," said Valley in reply. The second Monday of school Valley discovered rndny new faces at the sclioolhouse as sho came walking up. Jake camo out to meet her and whispered lowlv: "Bill Warren is hore." Valley was all curiosity to soo this terror of Wolf Prairie, as she began to term him. "That's him lonnin' agin the side o' tho house," whispered Jake, "and he's got his sliootin' instruments along." Valley gave a swift glance at tho tall, bronze-faced, strongly-built follow leaning by the doorway, with one hand caressing the muzzlo of a bright now rifle. He was quite handsome, she de cided at onco, with his flashing eyes so deeply blue as to be easily mistaken for black, and hair of tho hue of a blackbird's wing. He was dressed somewhat brigandish, and wore a richly finished bolt, from which protruded an ivory-handled revolver. Ho did not impress Valley as being a "holy terror" by any means. For one week everything moved along without discord. Valley seemed to liavo "got on tho blind side o' thet thar. Bill Warren," Jacob Hancock told the neighbors. All the pupils liked their now teacher, and she ruled them by a wise combination of kindness and firm ness. The big boys said she was "hard to beat," and Bill had admitted that she was "tolerable fairish like." "How o' ye gittin' erlong with thet thar Bill Warren?" asked Jacob Han cock of Valley, as she passed his house on her way home from school, after two weeks' labor at tho Wolf Prairie school. "Very nicely indeed," sho replied. "He seems to be quite studious so far." "He'll break out all of a suddint somo day, like one o' our Western blizzards," said ho, shaking his head wisely. "Now ye jes' mark my word fur it ef he don't." When Monday morning came Bill Warren did not put in an appearance at school. A littlo Bister of his handed Valley a note from his father. It read: "MissGaylob:—I write this to put you on your foiard. Bill swears he won't go to school any more and he is beyond my control. Ho lias threatened to brake up your school, as lio did last wiuter. Kcgretfuily.yours, 15. L. Warren. Valley's face flushed a littlo as she read this note, but instantly it took on a determined expression, and she said to herself: "If he cannot I can." As soon as school was- called sho asked if any of the pupils had .seen Bill Warren that morning. She learned from Jake that the "holy terror" was even then amusing himself with his rifle on the prairie back of the school-house. Valley appointed six of her largest boys to go out and deliver Jjor com mand to tho big truant. "Toll him I command him to oome immediately into the school-room and receive punish ment for his having played truant." Her messengers had grinningly obeyed, but soon returned, saying: "If ye please, teacher, Bill swore at us awful when we told him yer say, and jest stood us off with his revolver. He says he won't come." "Ah! We shall see," was all Valley said. But her dark eyes flashed and her lips were firmly compressed. Bidding the scholars be quiet and at tend to their studies, Valley left tho room. A short distance from the school house she found Bill Warren, sitting down examining the load in his rifle. His back was toward her. She slipped noiselessly up to him, and ere he was aware of her presence she grasped him by the coat collar and shook him quite soundly. "You rongli, unmanly follow, to send a lady such a message. Are you not ashamed of yourself Bill's face was a study. Surprise, anger, and shame struggled for mas tery there. "Give me that rifle and revolver, sir, .and oome back to school at once. I in tend to punish you for your truancy and for the use of rough language to your schoolmates, whom I sent to carry my orders." He hung his head, his bronze face covered srith blushes of shame. He was too utterly confused to offer resist ance, even if he had been so inclined, & Valley bravely possessed herself of his rifle and piBtol. "Ndw, sir, march to tho sohool-room at once," was her next command. Bill started t-o comply, but suddenly halted, and confronted her with a changed countenance. An o*pireSBiva of intense resentment flashed into his eyes and ho said: "I'm not a young one to be ruled over by any flip of a girl from back East, I'll give you to understand," and he straightened himself up like a young giant "Give me back my weapons," and he made a hasty step toward her. There was a iittle click of the pistol in Valley's hand and he paused. "Thunder! yon'd as lief shoot a fel low as not, I believe," he said, and he could not help gazing at the spirited little teacher, who stood so imperially before him leveling his own revolver at his head, with some degree of admiration. "You will not find it very safeto menaoe me. I expect to be obeyed, and without further trifling. Do you surrender, Bill Warren?" asked the plucky girl. The angry, sullen look faded from his face, and no word was necessary to show that he was conquered. For answer he "turned and walked back to the sclioolhouse by Valley's side. The incredulous stares the scholars favored Valley with, as she marched in witlt her captive, cau ba imagined moro easily than described. She lectured him on the sin of diso bedience before the whole school. Ho humbly stood and took it, then when she had finished the crushed bully took his seat and was very attentive to his books. That night she dismissed them all but Bill, whom sho sat down by to hold a conference with. LittlS Lola Warren hurried home with wild eyes, to tell the news to her papa and mamma. "You onght to saw Bill," sho said to them, excitedly. "Why, he lookod just as scaved like as could be, when Miss Valley mado him come in. And she's kept him in, and she's got his rifle and pistol by her desk, and I ex pect shell nigh about wear Bill out if he don't mind her." "God grant that sho may reform my wild boy,"sighed Mrs. Warren, deeply. And the. husband echoed the prayerful hope. As Valley sat by her conquered scholar that evening she implorod him to consider his parents, to whom his wild ways showed no respect sho ap pealed to his sense of honor she urged him kindly to think and develop the better manhood she assured him he was capable of developing. When she ceasod talking, there wore toars in Bill's e.ves. "I've beon an ugly big brute, and I beg your pardon, Miss Valley he said, shaking the hand sho offered him as a sign that peace was rostorod be tweon them. "You ought to shoot mo down liko a dog for the mean way I've actod. No body over made mo see myself as now I do, before. I will make a man of myself yet, or perish in tho trial." Bill was faithful to his word. He applied himself diligently to study and liis was a model of gentlemanly deport ment. "I jisblieve ye air a witch, Miss Val key," said Jacob Hancock one wot evening, as the toacher came back from school with his children. "Nothin' short of aright big slice of witchcraft would a tuck the stiffenin outen Bill Warren as ye have done," and he laughed heartily and told her that "it clean beats mo outen my socks however ye, a little gal, done what several men teachers hev failed ter do, ter vanquish ther holy terror o' Wolf Puraire." One evening as Valley was walking home Bill overtook her on his spirited pony. Ho was leading a beautiful black pony on whose back was a pretty new side-saddle. "Miss Valley," he addressed her, 'T am not up to making presentation speeches sncli as they do iu the East, but you have expressed a wish to own a gentle ponv so please accept this as a gift to you." "It would not look well for me to ac cept so costly a present," she replied, looking admirably at tho black pony with its proudly arched neck. But Bill did not agree. He insisted that the pony had been "trigged up" for her with the approval of his par ents, rind having so many ponies on their ranch thoy would never miss it. So Valley accepted Bill's gift with sin cerely grateful words. Valley was exceedingly fond of her new present, and it soon learned to know and love its kind mistress. One Saturday afternoon she deter mined to ride beyond the limits of Wolf Prairio and explore the country far west of hor prairie home. It was now spring and tho buds were bursting into beauty on every side. Valloy, lost in hor admiration of a scene so cnchanting, took no heed of the distance sho had come, until her pony paused by tho side of a lovely wooded stream to drink. Looking over her shoulder she was a trifle frightened to think how far she had heedlessly ridden beyond th^ range of any human habitation. Before she had time to turn her pony's head homeward, a brawny, painted Indian sprang suddenly from tho wayside bushes and grasped tho rein of her bridle. "Ugh!" ho uttored, leering into her scared face fiendishly. "Jumping Fox make a heap good take dis time. Good pony, pretty white squaw! Jumping Fox take both to his ltfdge." Tho poor girl was too thoroughly frightened, as her probable fate flashed across her brain, to cry out for help. Indeed her fright had deprived hor of the power to stir a muscle. She seemed frozen in the saddle. The Indian, with another triumphant gleam in his evil eyes, turned Valley's pony into a bypath and was fast lead ing horso and fright-benumbed girl deeper within the tangled woodland. Just as the Indian reached a crook in the path, they came face to face with Bill Warren on his pony. Bill had bben out hunting for wild turkey and Providence had led him thither. With his keen wits Bill com prehended the situation at once. With a yell of horror the young fellow'raised his rifle and fired directly at the Indian. But before Bill had pulled the trigger the wily Jumping Fox had jumped aside,'' and the bullet which was meant to pierce his heart bnried itself into the trunk of a tree beyond where he had stood. Bill let him ga skulking off without further molestation, while he hastened to Valley's side and received her into his strong arms just as she fainted. Water from the stream near by quickly restored Valley, and they rode toward home. Sho was too grateful to Bill for his timely rescue to speak much of it, besides the brave fellow would not- listen to thanks. After that thero seemed to be less conetraint between them. Perhaps each understood the other's heart better. Anyway their relations were of the most frieudly nature, and Valley nover rode across the prairios again, unless Bill attended her. After school li.id closed its success ful winter and spring terms, with Valley as teaohor, Bill sought her at home and manfully laid his heart be fore her. "All I am I owe to you. Won't you help me to continue my struggle to improve?" he pleaded. "How can any flip of a girl from back East help you, Mr. Warner?" she asked, roguishly. "Forgive those unkind words and bo mine," ho insisted. "I will, my diamond-in-the-rough. I do love you, and will help you iu your noble eSorts to improve." And Valley was true to her word. TUB BAY Of LISCOLS'S 1XAUQV ATI OS. "I was in Washington a few days prior tq the inauguration of Lincoln in 1861, having been tent there by the Harper's to take sketches when that event should come off., I did nothing but walk around tho city and feel the public pulse, bo to speak. There was no necessity of saying anything to any body. You intuitively recognized that trouble was brewing. Southerners had sworn that Lincoln shonld not be in augurated. Their utterances had fired the Northern heart and the people loyal to the old flag were just as deter mined that the lawfully elected Presi dent should bo inauguratod, though blood should flow in tho attempt It was an awful time. People looked different then than they do now. Lit tle knots of men could be seen convers ing together iu whispers on street corners, and oven the whispers ceased when a person unknown to them ap proached. Everybody seemed to sus pect every one else. Even women looked askance at each other, and the ohildron obliged to be out would skurry home as if frightened, probably having been warned by their parents. Tho streets at night, f&r several nights prior to tho inaugural ceremonies, were practically deserted. There was a hush over everything. It seemed to mo that tho shadow of death was hov ering near. I had constantly float ing before my eyes sable plumes and trappings of woe. I could hear dirges constantly, and thought for awhilo that I would have to leave the place or go crazy. I know all these sober thoughts were but imagination, but I also knew that the something which had influ enced my imagination was tangible, really existed. Tho 4th day of March came, and Mr. Lincoln was inaugurated quiotly and without ostontation. After the services were over and it became known that Mr. Lincoln had really been inducted into office thero was a savage snarl went up from the South erners. Tho snarl was infectious. It was answered by just as savage growls all over the city. But nothing was said. A single yell of defiance, a pistol shot, or even an oath would have pre cipitated a conflict Men simply glared at eaoh other and gnashed their teeth, but were careful not to grit them so it could be heard. I went to my room in the Willard and sat down to do some work. I couldn't work. The stillness was oppressive. At loast a dozen times Ipioked up my pencils only to throw them down again. I got up and paced the floor nervously. I heard men on either side of me doing the same thing. Walking don't relievo the severe mental strain, I sat down in my chair and pressed my head in my hands. Suddenly I heard a window go up and somo one stop out on tho bal cony of the Ebbitt House directly op posite. Everybody in tho hotels had heard him. What is ho going to do I asked myself, and I suppose every one else propounded the same mental in terrogation. We hadn't to wait long. He began to sing tho 'Star Spangled Banner' in a clear, strong, voice. The effect was magical, electrical. One window went up, and another, and tiion another, and heads popped out all over tho neighborhood. People began to stir on the streets. A crowd soon gath ered. Tho grand old song was taken up and sung by thousands. The spell was broken, and when the song was finished tongues were loosened, and cheer after cheer rent the air. The man rooming noxt to mo rapped on my door and insisted that I should take a drink with him. As wo passed along the corridors we were joined by others. Men were wild with joy, some of them were weeping and throwing their arms around each other's neck. Others •wero singing and all were happy. "Washington was itself again. Tho Star Spangled Banner' saved it"— Thomas Nagt, in Denver Xewx. UIQU-CHAIU THEOI.OGY. My sister recently crossed tho Atlan tic with her three children, aged re spectively 3, 5}, and 8, and the eldest two wero soon, like their parent, af flioted with sea-sicknoss, and sought tho seclusion that the state room grants. Master Willio, aged 8, lay tossing and restless and groaned out: "Oh, why do I suffer so, why do I suffer so?" Whereupon Nellie, tho 5^-year-old, who had evidently remembored the words if not tho meaning of what she had learnedin Sunday-sohool, leaned over the edge of the bunk and said, commiseratinglv "Willio, don't you know what the good book says 'Suffer little children,' and we are the little children."—Ex change. uriLiztXG AX CRATER. Auckland, New Zealand, is a lively and enterprising city of 70,000 inhabit ants. It is mtuqted near the crater of a largo extinct volcano, which, accord ing to scientists, may resume active operations at any moment Tho Auck landers, however, are not terrified at the prospect, and, in fact, are going to cement tho bottom of the crater and use it as a reservoir for their wator supply. People worry themselves ill, they worry themselves insane they worry themselves to death. Ambi tion.is a good thing energy is a good thing industry is a good thing. But restlessness, fret fulness, and worry—these tend directly to insanity und death. Oak it be said of an old toper that he ever has a sober second thought —Bos ton Courier, •p .yapaa HOPE FOB CONSUMPTIVES! A Now Theory or the Draad Disease "Which Seems Very Sensible. In fifty per cent, of tho eases, consump tion Is only the symptom of somo other dis ease I The disease, in such cases, cannot bo cured until tho cause, whatever it is, Is re moved. Moro than half tho victims of consumption have albumen in tho wutor. "What does this indicate?" Albumen cannot appear in whnt encapos from tho body, if the organs which take the wator from the blood are healthy. Wo drink water in large quantities every day. This wator goes through tho body and washes away the waste matter and decay of tho system, and takes it to the kidneys. If these organs aro healthy, this waste in solution in tho wator is removed by them. It not. tho natural action is reverted, and, instead of removing the waste, that poison ous stuff remains in the blood, but tho real lifo-giving element or the albumen es capes. Fancy the effect. This uric acid waste is a rank poison, and attacks tho weakost organ first. The Brompton Hospital of London, England, shows in its roports that over 52 per cent, of tho victims of consumption nro roally victims of kidney disoase, tho lung troublo, boing shown by tho prosonco of albumen in the blood, to be but tho indica tion of kidnoy derangement. Tho roal cause of pulmonary troubles being so author itatively shown to bo faulty, oven though unsuspected action of tho kidneys, explains why. in order to master tho droadea con sumption, one must rid the blood of the urlo acid Irritant, which inflames and burns up the lung substance. For this purposo there is nothing equal to that great speciflo, Wnrner's safe cure. This remedy has won the favor of medical men ail ovor the world, purely on its merits. Wo have no doubt that if the kidneys aro kept in natural ac tion, consumption and a groat many other diseases, eausod by 'uric acid, will not only bo cured, but will bo prevented. J. W. Wcstlako, of Mt. Vornon, Ohio, had a sister residing in Michigan who was thought surely to bo going with consump tion. She took ton bottles of Warner's safe cure, which he sent her, and he Bays: "That was tho last I hoard of hor consump tion." Thousands of such cases are devel oped every day. Dip your flngor in acid every day. and It soon fostors and is destroyed. Send acid poisoned blood through tho lungs every seo ond and they soon give way. This, then, is tho condition of things that always precedos consumption: First, wcakoned kldnevs: second, retained urio acid, poisoning the blood: the development of disease In tho lungs by the irritant aoids passing through them. Then there is a little cough in tho morning: Boon, thick, yellow matter is spit up, followed by loss of flesh und strength with dreadful night swoats and when tho patient goos to his school physician for help ho is put on cod liver oil. which his stomach, weukoned also by urlo acid in tho blood, cannot digest. Bocnuse thero is no pain prosont in tho kidneyB, tho patient does not think they aro afTccted, but tho kidney acid is doing its work every minute, every hour, day and night, and by and by tho dis easo of tho lungs lias advancod until pus is dovclopcd. then conies hemorrhages, and at last the glassy stare of tho eyes, which denote that tho ond is near. A post-mortem examination of such cases shows that tho terrible uric acid lias com pletely destroyed tho substance of the lung. It is impossiblo to euro lung diseases, whon tho blood is poisoned with uric acid. A 1'LEASAST XEIGUBORIlOOn. "Is that family that has moved in next door neighborly!1" asked one Sioux Falls woman of an other. "Yes, they appear to be. They've borrowed flour of me twice, tea once, and sugar three times. Then they have got our coffee-mill and one tub, and tho luitchet, and two lengths of stovepipe, and the baby carriage, and the woman empties all the slops over the fence into our'yard, and I see her coming across now to hang her clothes on our line." "I shouldn't think you would like to have them borrow things so much and act quite so free." "Oh, I don't worry much about it. We've got theft- mop and about hnlf of their dishes, and rolling-pin, and washing-machine, and the other day I borrowed ten sticks of wood from them, and each afternoon bur hired girl puts on better clothes than the woman has on hor back and walks up and down the sidewalk, and to-night I'm going to put out poison for their dog. Oh, we are getting along very nicely, and I think they are going to be very pleasant neighbors. This al ways was a splendid neighborhood."— Bakota Bell, Ark you nad, despondent, gloomy? Are you sore distressed? Listen to tho welcome bidding— "He at rest." nave you achcs and pains unnumbered, Poisoning life a Golden Cup? Think not there's no balm in Gileadt and "Give It up." A Goldeu llomedy awaits you— Golden not alone in narno— Reach, oh, suffering one, and grasp it, Health reclaim. Thero in but ono "Goldou* Remedy—Dr. Piorco'a Golden Medical Discovery. It stands alouoaa the great "blood-purifior," "strongth renower" ana "healih-restorer," of tbo ago! Tho Liver, it regulator removing all impuri tioa. Tho Lungs it strengthens, cleansing and nourlehiug thorn. Tho whole system it builds up, supplying that abovo all other things most needed—pure, rich Blood. Ij.tCKKI THE KDUC.ITIOS. lie applied to the superintendent of a street railway for position as a car driver. "Are you a llaVvard gradu ate?'' "2fo, sir.v "Ever practiced law or medicine?" "No." "Were you educated for the minis try?" "No I liavo only a common school education." "Then I can't furnish you witU em ployment. If I engaged a man who was not a bachelor of arts there would be a general strike on the line.' You'd better get a job as an editor."—2Vc braxkaJournal. In answer to casual question, How easy and truthful to tell it's A cure for the worst indigestion. To tako Viorce's Purgativo Pellets. TISK ituzzAun ,tSD THE row A fox who was crossing the Held one day encountered a buzzard, who not only jeered and insulted him, but actually dared him to combat. A peasant who came upon the scene ex pressed his surprise that the fox should submit to such conduct, but the latter replied: "An enemy not worth burying is not worth killing." Moral: That's why so innny loafers remain unthumped. "Wiiere are yon a-going?" risked Jack of an acquaintance. "To-soo a friend." "WolJ, I'll go with you, for I never saw ono yet." A js Ew Yokkeii advertises: "Gravestones for sale cheap, to cloio up an estate." Now is the timo to die.—Oil City Derrick. Mrs. Sudden Iticn says that she writes a diphthong between "Sudden" and "Itich now.—Boston Journal. Consumption Suroly Cured. To the Editor: —Plouio Inform vour readers that I have a ponitlvo roinndy for tbo abovo named diaoase. By Its timely u«e thouaandsof bopeleua cuea have been permanently cured. I •hall he glad to send two bottles of my remedy toek to any of your reader* who have consump tion if they will aond mo their Expreea and P. O. address. Jteap?ctful!y, T. A. 6LOCUM. M. U. 181 Pearl Et., N. Y. It is said that a groen turtle can livo sit week* without food. The turtle seemi to be the editor of tbo brnie creation. ArrEARANcns aro deceiving in this world. Tho niccst man you ever met was a bunco steerer Life. A man who had his attention drawn said it wasn't half as painful 31 cJfawjng a tooth. "I Don't Want Belief, Bnt Cnre," is the exclamation of thousands suffering from catarrh. To all such we say: Catarrh oan be cured by Dr. Sage's Catarrh liomcdy. It has boon done in thousand* of cases win not in yours? Your danger is iu delay. Iu close a stamp to Worli's Dispensary Moiicai Association, Buffalo, N. Y., for pamphlet on this disoase. XOT A COSTLY LUXURY. "IIow much does your best girl cost you, ell fellowf" was plumped at a beardless boy who makes liis bread and butter—about $8 a week—in the car penter trade. After demurring, as usual, overlooking at tho sentimential affair in so practical a light, liis objec ions were finally overruled and he con sented to talk. "Me and my girl take iu nil the mu seum shows. Ten weeks of museum at 20 cents a week makes $2. All the girls hanker after ice-cream and I gen erly put up $2 on ice-cream. I have to get her 10 cents worth of taffy oft and on that comes to 75 cents easy. In summertime we get reckless and go to two big blowouts anyway—most gen erally picnics witli the car-fare that comes to S3. Other evenings we go to the parks and freezo to one of them benches that don't cost nothing ex cept for car-fare 60 cents would about settle that, for sometimes we walk, don't you see. When Christmas comes I do the grand and buy a pair of ear rings or some other piece of finery the girls like, and never pay less than $2. neither. Let's see: $2, $2, 75 cents, $3,00 cents, $2 comes to S10.35 My girl says that is good enough for her." —Buffalo Times. TOO SACRED FOR I\TIWfIOX. "It can never be, George," she said —and her voice sounded far away— "all is ovor we must part and part forever." And George sat in the darkening twilight, with bowed head and clench ed hands, watching tho colors of his life grow cold and gray. "Is all over, indeed, between us, Clara?'' he said, brokenly. "No moro warm handclasps, 110 more lovelit glances, 110 more stolen kisses, sweeter than nectai', 110 "Xo, George, nevermore." "No more moonlight strolls," he went on, groping wildly for his hat, "or tender communion beneath starry skies 110 more tutti-frutti at Delmon iso's no more "Oil, George, dear," broke in the girl, with a convulsive sob—and now her warm, sweet breath was tickling his ear—"I cannot bear to seo you thus cast down. Let me unsay those dreadful words. Let me— Hut, gentle reader, wo must with draw from this sacred scene.—JVew York Sun. Dellcato Children, Nursing Mothors, Overworked Men, and for all dis eases where tho tissues are wasting away from the inability to digest ordinary food, or from overwork of tbo brain or b:«lv, all such should tako Scott's Emulsion of l'uro Cod Livor Oil with Hypophosphitos. "I used tho Emulsion on a lady who was delicalo and threatonod with Bronchitis. It put her in tucli good health and llosh that I must say it is tlrj bout Emulsion ever used."—L P. Waddell. M. D., Hugh's Mills, a C. SAXltED SAL'S ACE. A number of men working on anew building up on Ellicott street had been in the habit of begging smoked sausage of Butcher Lang. The sau sage was palitable, so the importuni ties for it were many. The cry for sausage without money became a nui sance. In this dilemma the butcher conceived an idea of making sausage that woiild dampen the appetite of the boys, as it were. He yesterday gath ered a lot of leavings of sausage-meat, mixed them plentifully with sand, and loaded the mess into an innocent-look ing casing. The link was boiled and laid aside for the lirst solicitor. He soon came. The sausage was given him he took a big, long bite and be gan to chew, and^then he changed liis mind about swallowing thp stuff. That man was full of grit just then, and he couldn't get rid of it for some time.—Buffulo Courier. Itching lll«s. Symptoms—-Mtiuiro intense itching and stinging most at niglit worse by scratching. If allowod to conlu.ua tumors foNn. which often bleed and uioerate, becoming very sore. Moi3!kn builders enn huvdly be com pared to creepers, although they certainly do nil) nil houses very fnbt. Lots of fellows who knew nothius St art beforo tho war eon draw a peiiBlou easily I •Johnny bbj'b he is his mother's ennoe, and she is alwnys nble to paddle it.— Mer chant Traveller. You will get moro comfort lot 25c. in I,jou"b ilcdStiffouera tliau iiinuy otherai ticloyou buy. What loven swenr—I will be true, my lovo. till death. What husbands swoar— not fit for Dublication. Whf.he on "man wants but littla here below" three others nre within calling dis tance who want all. "X havo lieu occasionally troubled with C.iughs, and in each caao lian: u»oI llro\vn'» lli'oncktnl Troches wUica hard novor faila'l, auJ lmut iy t.iuy aro sccond to uo:i in tho wurkl."- Irtir A Afay, t'a*/ticr, .St. /'(Ill', Minn. Abraham's son Isaac was not a scor. IT ho Lad beeu hiB name would doubtlcBD have he'en spelled Eycsic. The man at tho wbsol porform. ST. JACOBS OIL. Pby IT HAS DONE Tho Proof.—To aw Omtmont stopj the itching and bleeding, lioals nle.-ration, and in many cases reinovoa the tiirnore. It is oqually efficacious in curing all Hkin Diseases. Dr. Swayno & Son Proprietors. Philadelphia. Swayno's mail!" 0411 okMued of draggiats, or-by THE OXl.Y II'A TO KA T^OJl.y. "What is the best way of eating corn on the cob?"' asked it young mar ried woman of her husband at dinner the other day. "Don't know," was the gruff reply, "never tried to eat coru 011 a cob: al ways eat it off."—Elmira Gazette. Catarrh Cured. A elerpvman, after yoars of flnfferiiig from that loaihsome dia^asp, Catarrh, and vaii.ly trjirg every known remedy, ai Ja*t foi nd a pr(Bc»pion which completely cund and aavuo him from dea b. Any etifT.rcr from this dreadfut disease fowling a eelf-addroesod 8 nmncd env) op-) 1o Pror. J. A. Linrence, 212 East Ninih bireet, .wi rooiire the recip* froo of oliar.*o. si Relief,—Tn nuy climate nt anr season one or two applications of St. Jacobs Oil relieves often cures permanently. This is the avcrago experience in ten years. Cures.—The contents of a bottle have curod thousands of extreme chronic cases. Used ac cording to directions there is a euro iu every bottle. The Testimony.—Thousands make sure of this show­ ing, answers to inquiries concerning the per manency of the cures resulted as follows That from date of healing to date of rtaponti evay cure has remained permanent r&* curreiice of pain. Its Supremacy.—The twenty million bot tles sold can bo justly rated as so many cures in almost every case a permanent cure. Its price is the surety of every bottle being tho same, every bottle being a cure and tho poor are protected. Sold by Drvfffflftt and Dealers Everywhere, The Charles A. Vogeler Co., ISalto., Ud« Hfrom OME b'tudy. Secure a Bufllaess Education by mall huYANT's BuaiNKsa College,Buffalo, OLD is worth tt Oppr pound, 1'ettlt.s Eyo Salve (l.UOU, but ta euld at ccnts a box by dealer*. PENSIONS ft/L°,ld!e.r? *"1 L. Brno HAM. Att'y, Washington. D.C. PISO S.GUR E .FOR CONS PT10 N C*OItn MONTH. Agonta wanted. 10best as]! in/.Ill*rt.clw» In the world. 1 mnip'cFItEK VfcUU Addreaa JAY BUONSON. Detroit. Midi. ENSIONS Collected niul Increased or no foe. FktatrcraldA Powell InnlnnnpollB, Ind. Reject ed cusrs reopened. Send lor circular of law* rreo. totla dnr% Eamplea worth tlJO, FIIU. Jnea not tinocr the bore's feet. Writ* brewater lie in HolucrCo^ liollr. Mich PIpatentabilitySafety R. S. It A. P. Lacey. Patent Attorneys,Washington. D.C, TEMTS! .-t*-- .%TT.In«t"ifltiona and opinions to FItKb. 42*17 years' axperieuoe. to patentability Fit" nil set Pensions, if disa bled: Officers' travel pay, bounty collected Deserters SOLDIERS relieved: success or no feo. Laws sent free. JL, W. McCormick & 8oQi ftuklaf lo«,D,U a (litlniU, O. relieved: success BUBBBBHRBBBBn Rare rellefinrnrnri KIDDER'S PflSTILLE8.^rfS VmHnBHU^BHBHfCnwlcftowo* Ma*t» All PftDr. Williams'Indian Pile Ointment Ull LV Ian Kuro euro for blind, bleeding or ill 1 «%Uctalnsr plies. Cure guaranteed. I I Price f.0o. and fl. H. T. C1.ARKIS DUL'G CO.. Wholesale Aeenta, Omaha. Neb. AGENTS WANTED t0 nUt,"° novklty BUG wrnlflCU MAClilNKS aud RUO .PATTERNS, lor nikklnfr Rturts, Tidies, Caps, Mittens, fie. Ma ichlno rent by mall fof fl. Send for late reducei prico-list. K. ROSS & CO., Toledo. Ohio. CURE YOURSELF blllty. Wasting Vitality (r' tmlts of youthful errors, etc.) ftipnjje book on all Private Discnai'H* sent free, (svaled 4c stnmps, Perfectly Iteliable. 20 yearscxpenencc. Adr'c hock Box 145, Sioux City, la. DETECTIVES WtnlM In e*"fr? County. Shrewd men to act under loitruetloos lo our Sym Service. Kxperituee noloeectitrj. I'trtlcultra fre% Cranuau Detective Bureau Co.il Arcado.CiaciuitLO. JONES PAYStheFREICHT 5 Ton Wacou Iron etcra, Bum He»rtScales, «d«, Brut TveBuatel Dttn Bos tit $60. Ktht dealt, for free prlM nicntUn thl« t4 bddrtu joncs or ftlnaHAMTM. JB1NUUAMTON. N. Seeds! Ou»* brant fnllv flltifr* trated Catalogue FJIKK. Many Aow end Rare things. Car dm Seeds, Ft Seeds. ft#ff Of*'9 and Cotn. Send for jt. J. D. VANDERCOOK CO- Chicago, Ills. ELY'S C.1EAM BALM~ ,S SURE TO CURE r«Ar'fEVER©¥jy| OOI-D IX IIE/tD jinC1tr,Y. Ai'ply Balm into each nostril. :l.Y BROS., 83*i Dr._W 00D, a Bttfra duty to Scrofula Probably no form of disease It 10 generally dis* trlbuted aroongrur whole population as scrofula. Almost erery Individual tws this.latent poison conning his reins. The terrible sufferings co durcd by thoso aflllctcd with scrofulous sores cannot be understood by others, and their gratl* tudo on finding a remody that cures them, astoo* Isbes a well person. Tho wonderful power of Hood's Sarsaparilla In eradicating every form of Scrofula has been so clearly and (ally demonstrated thM It leaves no doubt that tt is the greatest medical discovery of this generation. It Is made by C. I. HOOD* CO., fcowell, Mass., and is sold by all dru^giii*. i.' IOO Dpses Gmwrfch St, 3V KTD E TS Will A SURE CURE FOR INDIGESTION and DYSPEPSIA. Over 5jflC0 Physicians hare sent ns tlieirapproval of DlGESTi'LIN, saying that It in the best preparation tor Indirection that they have ever used. We havn never heard of a case of Dyspepsia where DIGE8TYLTN was taken that was cot cureu. FOR CHOLERA INFANTUM. IT WILL CURE THE MOST AGGRAVATED CASES.. IT WILL STOP VOMITING IN PREGNANCY, ir WII.L RELIEVE CONSTIPATION.. Tor Bummer Corap nlnu and Chroule Diarrhea., which are tliti dircct results of imperfect digestion. D1GESTYL1N will effect an immediate cure. Tako DIGEsTYI.lN for tl nainn au disorders of the stomaoh they nil rotne from Indication. Ask your druggist for DIOKSTYLIX (piicc f.1 nor large bottle), li hedoisnot hsveit.retid one dollar to na and we will scnrl a bottle to yuu.expresa prepaid. Do net hesitate to reii-l your money. Our house Is reliable. Established tw-nty-ftvo yesrt. 1VM. K. lUIIK!t & CO., Manurnclorlnsr CJirtiiUt*. S:t .John St.. M.Y Weekly Wisconsin FOR ONE YEAR AND RAND & McNALLY'S STANDARD ATLAS, (Which a'.onc (ell, for Sl.Wi), Address CRAMER, AIKEN )& CRAMER, Alilwauli^f*, Wis. siouxotjowa. l.Vmiiiir Graduate in Modlelne—20 year* horpit.U ami pr/mfr practice— 10 in ChiniQo and jVViv orfe—Ks tiililbtlictl iu Sioux City Nino 'Vcars-is Mill treating nil Private. ScrvouH. Chronic nnd Special ijNca*eh, Hit rm at re a. nfmimti »cakne«8 (night lours) Iinnotencv (tort of ncruni iviurrr), ond all Iinftlo iVtaenHpH, IrrrguUirKUf. etc. Cure* guaranteed or money refunded Iiutrch f»tlr. Terms cash. Aire nnd experience nro important. No in jurious medicines u?ed— Xo time loft from work or hunlneaa—l ntlenu» nt dlMnnre treated by mnH— Mraieinee tent everywhere ine *rom M*' ntu break* age—Mate, yo'ir cn« nnd Mend' for Opinion nnd terms—C^niHultatlon ptrlctly confidential, person ally or by leuer-l)r. WOOD has tho largent Medical nnd Surgrlcnl Institute nnd Ky« and Eur Infirmary In the West—i»oomsfor patients nt fair rates, facilities to meet any emct* eenry—A Quiet Home and beet eare and. ekUl far Ixiilite rfurfno Pregnancy and. Coniln/mmf— Send 4c. postage for Illustrated BOOK and MEDICAL JOURNAL. (fSTMentton tills paper. It pars to have the FIRST and flDNt r. AGENTS WANTED. FARMERS PREFERRED SENT) FOB One Doljar CATALOGUE, I CURE FITS! Wheel say com 1 Us aaiiosan nsrsly to stop them lor a ums and thMhavs tham return aolp. Imaaaa radiealonrs. iAfcvamaaetEsdlasassioxFITS, KPUc KPSr or FALUNO BIOKNKA8 a 1 stud?. I warrant ray remedy to ear* lbs worst easaa. Baoaose haT« failedls na r« Band aionos for infallible rsmsdy. ih-71 SlS!1KOOT.ai.0.,18 of testimo­ nials substantiate the above''statements In the cure of all kinds of painful ailments.... livening Wisconsin By Sail Om Tear ud RAND & McNALLY'S STANDARD ATLAS, (Which *lone nils for H.00), Utes CRAMER, AlKENS & CRAMER, Milwaukee, Wis. (ZLSPILT! Cures Neuralgia, toothache, Headache, Catarrh, Croup, Sore ThroaL RHEUMATISM. Lame Back, Stiff Joints, Sprains, Bruises, Burns, Wounds, -Old Sores and All Aches and Pains. testimonials received by us mora than EE? V1 w®, for this valuable remedy. It ••°2iy relieves tho most severe pains, bui It Cures You.. That's the Idea I Bold by Drunltu. ffo eta. Bona Book freo. Address WIZARD OIL COMPANY CHICAGO. The Musical 1888. As the musical New Yeab hoavea in sight, wo sreet It with the -sound of Cornet* for any other musical instrument, for all of which Oliver Dltaon Jt Co. provide the very best Instruction Books). with the New Year, msny new.pupils will com* mence to lesrn the Piano to them and their acliers we commend RICHARDSON'S NEW METHOD FOR THE PIANOFORTE, a peerless book, which has held the lead for many y«*rs, *nd. unaffected by the appearance ot other undoubtedly excellent instructors, still sells liko a new book. Price $3. CHILDREN'S DIADEM and be utiful Sdsdat Rcuqol Bonos.a*»d is one of the best of its class. Tho nowost book. UNITED VOICES Pe do*i fm-best UIUUO ninhes abundance ot the Scuool So.Noa for a whole year. The newest book. Books that sell everywhere and all the time: Colleg-o Soiijm. r.o eta. War Sodf 50c. ubttco and PlHnlHtinu SnngH. arte. Mliisiroi Hones, 5?w GootI Old .Sonirs wo us«?d to elnSi SI. KINKEI/S COPY BOOK 173 ct«.l. with the Bo mcnta and Exercises to be written, is a useful book for tcachere and scholars. Any Book Mailed for the Retail Price, LYON & HEALY, CHICAGO. Oliver liitson 0 Co.. Boston. HAT YOU? Do you feel dull, languid, low-spirited, life leu, and indescribably miserable, both physi cally und mentally experience a sodro of fullness or bloating uftcr eating, or of "(rone ness," or emptiness of stomach in tho morn ing, tonffuo coated, bitter or bad taste in mouth, irregular appetite, dizziness, frequent beadftches, blurred eyesight," floating specks beforo the eyes, nervous prostration or ex haustion, irritability of temper, hot flushes, alternating with chilly sensations, sharp, biting, transient pains licro and there, cold feet, drowsiness alter mcAis wakefulness, or disturbed nnd unrcfreshlng sleep, constant, bidcscribablo feeling of dread, or of impend ing calamity? If vou havo nil, or any considerable number of these symptoms, you aro suffering from that most common of American maladies Bilious Dyspepsia, or Torpid Liver, associated with Dyspepsia, or Indigestion. The moro complicated your disoaso has become, tho err will subdue it, if taken according to direc tions for a reusnnablo length of time. If not grave maladies aro quite lfablo to set in and, sooner or later, induce a fatal termination. Dr. Pierce'* Golden medical Dis covery acts powerfully upon tho Liver, and through thot great blood-purifying organ, cleanses the system of all blood-taints and im purities, from whatever cause arising. It is equally cfllcudous in actinjr upon tho Kid ney*, and other excretory organs, cleansing, strengthening, and healing their diseases. As an apiKJtizinar, restorativo tonic, it promote* digestion and nutrition, thereby building up both ilesh and strcugth. In malarial districts, this wonderful mcdlclno has gained great ceiubritr in curinff Fover and Aguo, Chills and Fever, Dumb Ague, and kindred diseases. Dr. Pierce's Golden Medical Dis covery CURES ALL HUMORS, from a common Blotch, or Eruption, to tho worst Scrofula. HMt-rheum, Fever-sores," Scaly or Itough Skin, in short, all diseases causicd by bad blood aro conquered by this powerful, purifying, nnd invigorating medi cine. Great Eating Ulcers rapidly heal under iu benign influence. Especially has it mani fested its potency in curing Tetter, Eczcma, Erysipelas, Bolls, Carbuncles, 8oro Eyes, Scrof ulous Sores nnd Swellings, Hip-joint Disoaso, "White Swellings,'* Goitre, or Thick Neck, and Enlurgcd Glands. Send ten ccnts in stamps for largo Treatise, with coiorcd plates, on Skiti Diseases, or tho same nmount for a Treatise on Scrofulous Affections. "FOR THE BLOOD IS THE LIFE." ThorouglUy cleanse it by using Dr. Pierce's Golden IflcdlciU Discovery, and good digestion, a fair skin, buoyaut spirits, vital (Strength and bodily health will be established. CONSUMPTION, which is Scrofula of (he La tigs, is arrested and cured by this remedy, if taken in tho earlier stages of tho disease. From its mar velous power ovor this tordbly fatal disease, when first offering this now world-famed rem edy to the public,. Dr. Pieroe thought seriously of calling it his 44 Consumption Curb," but abandoned that name as too restrictive for a medicine which, from its wonderful com bination of tonic, orsti'cnfithening, alterative, or blood-cleansing, anti-bilious, pectoral, and nutritive properties, Is uncqualcd. not onlv as a remedy for Consumption,, but for all Chronic Diseases of the Liver, Blood, and Lungs. For Weak Lungs, Spitting of Blood, Short ness ot Rreath, Chronlo Nasal Catarrh, Bron chitis, Asthmn, Severe Coughs, and kindred affections, it is an efficient remedy. Sold by Druggists, at $1.00, or Six Bottles for $5,00. Send ten cents In stamps for Dr. ?ierce*s book on Consumption. Address, World's Dispensary Medical Association, 663 main St., BUFFALO, N. V. S u. NO. 3-88. UK» WKJTING TO AlYl !tTiM U9 iMtwMiy you saw tlie advertlsmeut it litis paper. Che mnHtot. Nott Well! nro them erery tlroo—are __ aivdTlttOa. Hundreds of vardener* Kladlr tmf fj ftowlag mr Boedn tltej made f*M per acre on early Cabba«e,Cv~I gardener'a wholes ale hat EARLY VEGETABLES OUR SPECIALTY. fre* Pack>» harliest Vegetables nn Trial, l'ostpaid ILIA I Qisiit Vegetable*, wjtli fiSO Oold Prise,flOo. 109.. OOOliotes and Plant*. Tremendona stuofc of Flower. Vegetable, OrsM and Farm Seeds. Bonanta Oals. SOP bo. per acre. Floor area 1W acres IVtato cellar, 8MOO chkap ramcinrs. s*ni«c~ Csbbage aa6 Superbly TUostrate'! Catalog. JOHN A. SALZER, LA CR08SE. WI8. LEADER R0ADjw«2£ 1 AMnaFlEMINB MFQ. CO. FQRT WAYNE, IND, rs