Radio Wits Tell
Best Dog Jokes
Stars of "Can You Top This?*
Try to Outdo Each Other
Mention any subject at all and
^enator Edward Ford, Harry Hersh
(field and Joe Laurie, Jr., the three
S i of radio's famed "Can You Top
i?" show, are Supposed to come
t back with a pertinent joke or
•tory. The Gaines Dog Research Cen
ter, New York City, thought it would
lest them out b(y asking each of the
trio for his favorite dog tale. All three
Responded promptly, with the fol
SENATOR EDWARD FORD
Some of the fellows were sitting
round talking about how smart their
ogs were. Finally one said, "You all
think your dogs are so smart, eh?
SWell, let me tell you about that dog
®f mine. Last year we had a fire at
®ur house. There was confusion all
ever the place. Our faithful hound
Stood with us watching the firemen.
Suddenly, he broke away and
Ë to the burning building. A minute
carried the insurance policy wrapped
In a wet towel."
A fellow complained that he had
mice in his house. He said. "I don't
seem to be able to get rid of those
His friend asked, "Have you tried
a dog? Get a rat terrier. They're
So the man bought a dog. A few
days later the friend slopped in at
Ford, Bershfield and Laurie with
Sniejok, a Sanoyeilc,
his home and saw IKe dog playing
frog and tag with the mice.
"Hey, what's going on around here?
asked the friend. "What's this dog
playing with these mice for?"
"Oh, those are our own mice," was
the reply, "but just let a strange
mouse come in here, and then
. JOE LAURIE, JR.
. "So long, Judge."
Brown was brought into court foi
walking a clog without a muzzle or
"Well," said the judge, "what hav*
jrou got to say for yourself"
Many Nickel Countries
In the past nickel has been mined
In a great many countries. It ha?
been mined in recent years in quan
tity in Canada. Celebes, Cuba. Ne-*
Caledonia, Norway and Russia, and
in smaller amounts in several other
Size of Venezuela
The area of Venezuela is 16,000
square miles greater than that of
Texas and Oklahoma combined. It
is about 20,000 square miles greater
than the areas of France and Italy
First Baseball Team
The Knickerbockers of New York,
organized in 1845, was America's
first professional bapeball team. In
1849 they became the first
formed team, wearing white shirts,
blue trousers and straw hats.
Increase Farm Products
Agricultural production could be
increased by 50 per cent by large
scale soil conservation and land de
velopment, a survey of Twentieth
Century fund points out.
Concrete Seagoing Ship
First concrete seagoing ship
built during World War I at Red
wood City, Calif. She was launched
six weeks after construction began.
First Music School
First music school in the United
States was Music Vale seminary at
Salem, Conn., opened by Oramel
Whittlesey in 1835.
SUNDAY SCHOOL TO
PRESENT SOUND PICTURES
Warland:—Under the auspices of
the Warland Sunday School, of
which Mrs. George Bentley is Sup
erintendent, a program of sound
pictures, "The Book For The World
of Tomorrow" and "Unto The Hills"
will be presented in the Grange
Hall at Warland, on Wednesday
evening, March 31, at 8:00 p. m.
There will bè no admission charge,
but an offering will be received to
cover the cost of the films.
WILL TEAR UP NO. 37
ON CALIFORNIA AVE.
The City and J. Neils Lumber
company equipment was expected
to be put into action this morning
on the tearing up of about three
blocks of Highway No. 37 on Cali
fornia avenue, beginning from a
bout Sixth Street and working
They will dig deep enough to
put in a sub base, according to John
Ledum, and the street will be closed
until the repair work is completed.
Our Great America ßy Hade
AmERKAK FOREST PROPUCT MANUFACTURER*
ARE Ü4IM6 MORE ANP MORE OF "WE TREE —
T|R PARK, ONCE PURNEP
V t Æ ^ A* WASTE
HOW PRODUCES pS
5 VALUABLE / '
THE 4ISHIN6 OF
THE VJIMP IN
14 BEINS USED
ENDURANCE HORSE RACE
GOES TO HELL CREEK
Miles City, — (U.R) — The Range
Riders Rodeo Association here has
turned down a request by the
Chamber of Commerce that the en
durance horse race be run from
Billings to Miles City this summer
as it was last year.
The committee said that commit
ments had already been made to
have the race start at Hell Creek, a
recreation site on Fort Peck Lake.
They said the plans would stand.
Dan Lockie, spokesman for the
Range Riders said the ride will be
gin at Hell Creek at four p, m. June
18 and will follow the 125 mile
route to Miles City with stops to be
made at Jordan and Rock Springs,
It will conclude here on June 19, the
the first clay of The Range Rider
"THE FRIENDSHIP TRAIN" TO
BE PRESENTED FRIDAY
The fifth and sixth grades will
present the program "The Friend
ship Train" on Friday, April 2nd
at 8 o'clock in the New' Central
The program is of unusual in
terest in that the youngsters begin
a trip on their Friendship Train
and in so doing, stop at many places
of interest w'here dances and
scenes pertaining to that special
locality are enacted through dia
logue, singing and dancing.
You will no doubt enjoy visiting
the Mardi Gras, Scotland, Ireland,
and many other places with the
younsters when you watch them
GIVE DRIVERS* LICENSE
EXAMINATIONS APR. 12-13
The Western News has been I
notified by the Montana State j
Highway Patrol that it will conduct |
examinations for drivers' licenses j
April 12 and 13 in Libby.
The examinations will be from j
9:00 a. m. till 5:00 p. m., and will '
be held in the Community Room
at the Lincoln County Court House.
TO PUBLISH RULES FOR
VFW MARBLE TOURNEY
The Western News has just re
ceived the rules for the VFW's an
nual Marble Tournament, which
are scheduled to appear in next
week's issue of the paper. Much
interest is aroused each season a
mong the younger citizens of the
community by this tournament.
Watch for rules and dates of the
V.F.W. JUNIOR RIFLE TEAM
The Junior Rifle Club is now
a part of over 1500 Junior Rifle
Clubs in the U. S., under the juris
diction of the National Rifle As
sociation. As Mr. Hillbird stated,
the Club has been issued a charter
and it will be here shortly.
The Club now has ninety-one
members signed up. Seventy-one
were at the range last Thursday
BETWEEN LEAGUE TEAMS
Now the Season is Nearing the End.
Come Down and Cheer for
BOWL on Tuesday Eve and
The Weekend YOURSELF
SISTER OF MRS. ROWLAND
PASSES IN MASON CITY, IA.
A letter from Mrs. M. D. Row
land of Iowa City, Iowa, states
that a sister, Mrs. John Wiley of
Mason City, Iowa, has passed on.
Mrs. Wiley had visited here many
times with the Rowlands and was
quite well known and will be re
| membered by her many friends,
; A marriage contract was entered
! into March 29 between Carl Hovis,
Colville, Wash, and Theodosia Guf
fee, Jennings. Mrs. Hovis, daugh
ter of a Montana pioneer family,
well known in this district, is fa
miliarly known as "Dunn Creek
Nell,' 'having lived in that area
for many years. The contract was
signed before Justice of Peace Hal
Hepner. Witnesses at the event
were A. B. Christie and Ruth Jo
Charles E. (Gene) Fletcher and
Geralding Cottrell were married by
Rev. Wm„ C. Stearns today, April
Cecil Mortenson was admitted
Monday as a surgical patient.
Born to Mr. and Mrs. Albert
Svendsbye, March 28, a boy; born
to Mr. and Mrs. F. E. Lovering,
March 27, a daughter.
Harry Roberts was admitted on
March 29 as a medical patient.
Kenneth, son of D. A. Davidson,
was released Tuesday.
WILL RETURN WITH NEW
AMBULANCE AND HEARSE
Harold Gompf left by plane with
Russell Deist and Ed Trueman for
St. Louis Tuesday where he will
take possession of a new ambulance
and hearse. Although the vehicle
is not brand new it is far superior
to the present one.
Mr. Gompf will drive the ambul
LAST MONTH WAS MONTANA'S
COLDEST FEBRUARY SINCE '42
temperatures during the month was
2Q.3 degrees— 2.1 degrees below
normal. Coldest section was the
central part of the state where the
average was 19.4 the Weather
Bureau said. Lowest temperature
reported during the month was 39
below at West Yellowstone on the
Helena, — (U.R)
TRIPS TO LIBBY
The U. S. Army and U. S. Air
Force Recruiting service, located in
Kalispell, will have a représenta
tive in Libby twice monthly.
M/Sgt. Bill Groose will be avail
able at the Employment Office
April 14th and April 28th to answer
any inquiries pertaining to the
army and air force.
April 8-9 and 17
Again it is Anril—Cancer Control
Month by act of Congress, Presiden
tial Proclamation and the will of
the American people.
The American Cancer Society
again extends to the citizens of
Libby, opportunity for Membership
in the Montana Division of the
Society, through contribution to its
financial support. The Theta Rho
Club girls have offered to conduct
the house-to-house canvass on
April 8, 9. and 17, Local American
Cancer Society leaders for the
group are Mesdames E. J. Driear,
W. R. Littell, R. E. Clarke, and D.
JANE EYRE IS POPULAR
HEROINE OF LITERATURE
If a literary vote were taken to
determine the most popular hero
ine of fiction, which character in
that wide circumference, do you
suppose would win the nomination?
Would it be one of the sterling
heroines of George Eliot? A superb
woman from the pages of Charles
Dickens? A romantic Jady of Sir
Walter Scott's creation/ or one of
the piquant damsels from the pen
of Jane Austin? Each of these ladies
has many virtues to commend her
and each commands, deservedly, a
host of devoted followers. Yet there
is another candidate for this great
honor—"Jane Eyre." Of all the
heroines of fiction is there one more
charming, more lovable than Jane
Eyre? Is there any one of them
subjected to a more fiery ordeal
than Jane Eyre? And is there any
heroine, who, in the final analysis
presents a more touching example
of pure love and fidelity than Jane
Eyre? The answer to each of these
questions is, manifestly—no.
For those who wish to decide for
themselves, an excellent opportun
ity will be given when the Senior
class play, "Jane Eyre." is pre
sented. Watch for announcement
of date and further details next,
The cast in order of their ap
pearance are: Loretta Baenen. Char
lotte Becker, Helen Church. Eugene
Nelson. Jeannie Yaple, Adeline Hut
ton. Roy Davidson, Edna Mae Baeth,
Anna Ronning, Edwin Edstrom,
Kenneth Miller, Victor Mertel. Fern
Tisher, Georgianna Erhard, Albert i
Committees for the play are as |
follows: Stage manager, Albert Rol
seth; Make-up, Peggy Rawlings, j
Delores McCallum, Pat Gooselaw; :
Lighting, Roy Davidson; Programs, i
Anna Ronning, Fern Tisher; Cos-1
tumes, Gretchen Gehrke, Edna Mae I
Baeth, Jackie Hiatt, Adeline Hut- !
ton, Georgianna Erhard; Advertis- |
ing. Pat Gooselaw. Jack Kyser.
The U. S. Army Corps of Engin- 1
eprs during the war produced a
stack of maps 300 times as high as
the Washington Monument.
FRIDAY AND SATURDAY, APRIL 2-3
ORANGE JUICE—No. 2
April 3, 1948
Yi lb. link pork
2 Vi tablespoons cold
1 cup Pet Milk
1 cup water
Ys cup corn maal
1 teaspoon salt
1 cup chopped,
Turn on oven; set at hot (425° F.).
Heat milk and water to boiling. Stir
in com meal and salt so slowly that
boiling does not stop. Add apples.
Boil and stir 5 min. Pour into greased
8-in. baking dish. Put sausage and
cold water into skillet. Cover; steam
5 min. Arrange sausages on top of
com meal mixture. Bake 1? min., or
until sausages are brown. Serve with
fried apple slices, if desired. Makes 4
OLD DUTCH CLEANSER
SPIC and SPAN
2 For .
Slightly Salted .
Yost Will ISeedt
Pet Milk, 2 for 29c
BOLYARD'S BETT ER ME ATS
Morrells — Pound
BOLYARD'S GROCERY AND MARKET
NCR QUALITY AT LOWER PRICES I HOM COAST TO tOASI
EASTER FINERY HAS
PERFECT DAY IN '48
The Easter Pahade wended its
way to the churches; holiday din
ners, and various other destinations
Sunday under a warm sun and
bright blue sky, with all of the
Easter finery on display this year.
Traffic on the highways close in
to Libby were dotted with auto
mobiles all of the afternoon, many
taking advantage of the beautiful
weather to complete the day with
a drive of relaxation.
Monday came in with disagree
able rainy weather, followed by
three or four inches of
Tuesday, which further
one that Easter was a day made for
itself this y
ay the snow had disap
peared and weather conditions were
much the same as before Easter.
FROM LAST YEAR
Helena, — (U.R) — Communicable
diseases decreased in Montana last
w ^ck under both the previous week
and a comparable week last year,
according to Q r l j. Lull, epi
demiologist for the State Board of
A total of 362 cases were reported
t0 Board of Health during the
eI T ded March 6, compared to
4 "" during the previous week and
440 during a comparable week last
y ear -
I biggest decrease was in cases of
measles - down to 71 from 151 the
'Y ee ,| c , kef°, re : mumps increased
shghtly during the week as did
s ° cial diseases; scarlet fever and
c b J cken pox were down, Dr. Lull
| said -
j ~ ..
!,. , e u ,, • Army organized the
first weather bureau.
Speeding through an inlerteelion slop sign, one of there driver»
; collided with another ear. The force of the crath entangled the two :
I cart and they » kidded together across the intersection and slammed
1 into a »tone wall. Both driven and a passenger were killed, two were
terioutly injured. National Conservation Bureau reports that ditre
I gard of traffic control devices ranks third at a cause of death in motor
ANTELOPE MAKING AN
Héléna, — (U.R) — A recent count
shows (there are 490 antelope in
Petroleum county, 175 more animals
than were found there two years
ago, according to the State Fish and
The Department also said that in
the northern part of the same coun
ty, a count on the chain Buttes
shows an increase of over 100
animals over any previous census.
This latter section is closed to hunt
ing at the present time.
FIREMEN'S BALL IS
The annual Easter Ball put on
by the Libby Volunteer Fire De
partment was successful this year
as in the past, although the crowd
attending the dance was somewhat
smaller than usual.
Members of the Fire Department
agree that sale of tickets for the
dance was most gratifying and they
wish to extend their thanks to those
in Libby who helped to make it
MRS. KARNES, LIBBY »MOTHER
(Continued from Page One)
Co. in Portland, Ore., and has a
wife and one son.
AH children graduated from Lib
by High School and were confirmed
in St. Luke's Episcopal Church in
Upon recommendation of the lo
cal Auxiliary, accompanied by
merits considered, and a photo
graph of Mrs. Karnes, she was en
tered in the State contest, which
will decide the winner of the title
of State mother, who in her turn
will be entered in the National con
xml | txt