Newspaper Page Text
(h-v.i-:. HAILKY r,T.(H K. Ma:
WA'.LlTi', HAH, II. L
su:s( mnioN i;.tks
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0. P. ROBERTSON, Ed.
MRS. 0. B. HO8EHTS0N.
aid Prop.
Bus. Mgr.
Saturday, March 10
There ? ,-4t jnslioji nov,.1noforot1io . Anioricun ;p;opU r such
vitnl :mpori.ir.oo :i tho const ruoi ion of th,- iNiearaguii canal. .Ami
!l. would bo 1'' height til' fol'y -in enf,or into any entangling treaty
lif, w'.i'u-h tli" United Sl ilrs vtiiM bo deprived of tlio privilege of
fortifying the.-oanr.l nl'lor it i. constructed. Th Continental .pow
ers iLvny th. right of 1ln U:i'!,l Sirdes lo do so. and this the very
argument of nil o'h.-'rs which should convince Iho .American people
that the canal s;;;ul.l 1i domi tinfoil hy tin? guns n.-j ,woll as tin? cap
ital of the '"nil ,vl St nos. It wuiU ,lw just us sensible . to deny us
tho light to f.ivtify u;iv gmt cor.nnerci.il cities simply be:':ui.-m tho
continental ((v.-.--ie s(nd lln-ir ships to t ratio with them us to de
ny us the ri'ji,;!! rrtify h- t an d bui.lt, by American capital. ,
Nothing t ii.nld be more absurd than,,to phice Aineiica in tho po
sition of beint compelled to allow any nation with which she mifjht
be at wiirtcvnil, war vossls lliroujfh thp.cnnal to harry hor co;ists
In c:so the continental powers
upon tho United Stutes to foj-oiro
would bo far wiser to abandon tho
til tho time i.!.iipo to , build and, fortify it in defiance of, tho
European powers. '
CO O
(3" To burn or not burn -that's tho quosti,on,.. In a maturely
c;)nsidor(!d editorial last .wo-ik. the News suirostod tho propj'iety
'oi removing Kahuhii from it s present sitoty a jilaco. where it w.oijjfl
lip, perfectly frtv from pl:i,yiu taint. Whether, this will bo done or
"not. is a tpiosticn v.l.M-h vitally inlerest. everyone .who oxpac.t.-; to
' 'dp any business in KahqliP. from the .humblest Chinese ptnldlci:
tt t wo larirest vessel which losuls
the whole town bp.moyotljtr. nut.
!cision of which is awaited with
'the store buildings Infested with
. stroyed wiiii their contents.
Tho News thinks that the froyornient. ( should phico a fiiir.vitliui
fm on this property. stores, wiiro-houses and all other buildings
which u-re.i.nojyn to be. infested with Kahului nits srad burn thorn
v Jice. Tho, pecil-?. the ni.p-cliants. tl,iq .shippers am 5iboyp..aIl
the sugar planters simply csumot afford to take .any chances on, hav
ing the plague break out iigain at Kahului. and it is to bo, hoped
that the IJoartl tif Health will fully intl faithfully, investigate this
matter, and if they arrive at the decision that the public health
and sa"oty depend on the doKtmetion of those buildings, then they
cannot be burned too soon.
,gp : Infmne ca.sesvat ot.ton, the nrst question which u tourist asks
on yisiting Maui is: "Why is there not more spmi-tropical fruit
raised on tho Island?'' ;-.
Heretofore tho answer might properly have been that there has
been no market for tho surplus, but thsit is true no longer. If ban
anas, pineapples and cocoa nuts, to say nothing of alligator pears,
were raised in sufficient quantities to make it an object to ship thorn
by the steamers that are now constantly leaving Maui for the Coast,
it would bo found profitable. But really there is hardly enough of
this class of. fruit raised to supply tho homo demand since- .travel
has increased so much.
There is much hind which might be devoted to the raisinii' of
"marketable fruit without interfering in the least with its present
use. Odd corners might bo doyotodo bamina.s. and other perish
able fruits which the people hero on the .Island would bp glad to buy.
It is to be lioped t h;it some of those who have small land .hold
ings will read this and profit by its suggestions.
o
gfjj Tho California legislature
the, popular election of United
ajj.prpsent. it is practically , impossible to.ploct a poor man to the
Senato of the United. States. There are .twenty senators in the
present congress whoe aggregate capital is 170.000.000.
'No onowill imagine for a moment that the capital represented by
these men is not a power in the congress of the-.United States f;i,r
more potent than the personality of f he-men who own it. And
wherever the rights of the people
. oft capitid, there cijii be but one
bp corrected by the election of
: masses of American voters arq beginning to realize the f5ict. It
would not bo surprising to see this clainge brpught about, as the
American people get whai eyer.they want when, they cry for it.
The assertion has bpcu made more 11(an '-iiye tljut the edito.risil
staff of the News are cooking up
serious that the nnmagenient deem it proper to notice the charge
editorially. The public may rest assured that evry telegram in
I the News is a bona fide one, the only change in the, original being
an occasional condensation.
o o o ,
1 .
fH Maui has s; demaud to msike of the government , and that is thiit
inter-isl .nd mail service shall be maintained ut any reasonable
cost.. There can hardly be a good excu.se for jlesiving us. on Maui
"without nows from Honolulu for two weeks at a time as has just
been done.
9
!H The columns of the .News are always open Jo con unifications
of, a proper nature, and while as a gonend rule it is hotter to keep
out of the papers, still at times signed letters in the papers servo
H, doubly useful purpose; towit: and also to .
o o
With Kihei as an open ptrt,. the sugar planters ou Maui will
suffer nothing more than a little inconvenience in shipping tho pres
ent crop'.
MAUI BLUE BOOK
Him ,t. w. Kiiiiiii. riri-nit .iniU". '
.1. K. .. Im'i'Iu. 'Ii'l-l, IHmiil I'mnM.
.Iiiiiin' Mi Km. Mie'lstriile
k::iliin;lllimt,
" l:i'i:rilt llo. " "
" Knli'iUilll, " "
" .los pn. " "
1'iiniumi. " "
" ieil!ll'( " "
" K ii'KHilialiiliulii. " "
Wi -.IlliVn
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Wi.llnl.il
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Kii'-rni'i'
M.'n ;i'.l
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Wi:ll'il;il
'V-, 'IiiVii
Manta 1 1
l.il'H'
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M. I.il i.
V: .ilul.il
Mil' ' A i ii
LllU'-lil:-
I.. M Itiililwin. Klii-rlfT,
:. v. H!isi'Hii':i,,ii utv r-'H'i-irt.
w. ii. u.n.
r. u. i.iii'i.uiv,
I''. Wil H...-U.
' Tr.miilr, " "
cuv i ;io:in'"m. cuptitin ruiii'i.
K. I- Il.ll. ..
M. K:iuh- n'lail, "
l.il'il-.'V.
I-'. .1. KiiM'y.
i'. II. :ii U'-,'-. T.i- A -ii'sn.ir.
V. T. Uo'iinmn. li.'itulv As.u'M
W. I . Allien..
Ii I M- II . " "
J. ( il'll H, " "
II '
M.l.,l''vi
11. iUu
WiiU'il.-.i
l.ll!i: in:-
Hll'lU
should make a combined demand
tho fortification of tho canal, it
buildinr of this wator-way un
smtl unloads there., llut whether
tfyoro is. still a question thp,tle
interest, and that is whether or not
p!ai'uo;srnitten rats shall bo de;
passed -a joint absolution favoring
Stutes somitor.s.,. As constituted
come in conflict with the interests
result. This would in a measure
senators by popular vote, and tho
telogims. and the, .charge is so
a cc::iii;c r::i.
Dr. (,'iirvin cndeiiiPH in I he nvwt
positive 'lerins 1lie sanitary condi
tion of 1'ie liu'au'ss si root of Wniluku.
-Star.
The s'.bove. to one who is unac
quainted with 111.' I rue stale ofall'airs
sit V;iilll; i. U I'aleulat'vl to produce
nn injus0v injnrio'K impression.
The sil u;iti i.i at WailuUii is far from
whai, t'u- S.ar w iiii l iadieate. ai we
will s').w. W.ill.iliii consists of prac
tical!; 1 wo towns.
Tli int .'rse.-ti'Vi of M u:i street and
Iligii slrcci.. is.. 1.1 e, center of that
jrn tion of . WaiUiKH o jcupied , by , tlu,
belter class of reoiiie.
lloll'iiiaa & Ve'.lesi'ii nail Kilns & Oo. I
have stores on opposite comers,
Along High street from Knos itv Oo.
toward Wiiikapu are the old YVaihiku
Hotel, the lax office, school, court
house, foreign
and native, churcho:
and a number
of residences of. our
best people.
From Hoffman & Vetlesen's store
on Main street, - which parallels , lap
river toward Kahului. are the post
ofli.-e. the News ollice, Shrador s
New Hotit'l, the Windsor. Sheriff
I Jaldwin's . residence, the Anglican
church. Judge Kepoikai's residence.
etc. Above Miiia street on High
street are the residences of Dr.
Armitage, II H. Hailey, C, H. Wells,
Mas F.eUhart and titberi.
Tliis portion of Wailuku is sis clean
and healthy a spot as there is on the
Islands; in fact it is 1 he boast of this
portion of the town that we have one
of the choicest spots on the Islands
from a sanitary and.-gi nerally delight'
ful point of view.
About, a quarter of a mile from the
corner of Main and High streets, and
toward Kahului. Market street runs
off at right angles to Main street,
toward Waihee. This is th. China-
town of Wailuku and is doubtless the
portion of Wailuku referred toby Dr.
Garvir.
While it is true that this portion of
Wailuku is quite as bad as Dr. G. has
painted it. stiil it would be quite as
unjust to condemn the whole of Hono
lulu for is-ill thy Chinatown as to con
demn the -whole of ailuku for its I
equally disrepvlsible Chinatown.
Sale of the Manuel Ross Estate.
On Monday the property of the
Manuel Ross Estate was sold at 4un
ti hi. Tho Wailuku real property bi
l tnging to the estate was bought by
A. Enos & Co. for S.'UMO. This pro
perty comprises about one-third of
an acre and has a frontage of 118
feet on Main street adjoining the
A. Enos &.Co. store property.
Tho Waihee property wii s ,swith-
drawn froio sale and will be distribut-
ed to the heirs... The personal prop-
erty realized 5?222.l), the total
a inomH-realized from the sale being
itf, 222.110.
TIMELY INFORMATION.
1
i
i'owl Kroner is the way to pro
nounce old O0111 Paul's name.
Most people know what an Uilland
er is without knowing that the word
is pronounced "Eightlander." In the
same way a little stream is called a
'spreight." although tho word is
spelled 'spruit "
Of the 'vowels the jnost noteworthy
is the "u" which has the open sound
and is in some words dragged out to
such a length as. to resemble the
bleating of a sheep.
Among the typogfuphicid terms
with which war correspondents are
beginning to tangle up tho cable, per
haps the most familiar to English
readers re "kopje" and i-kop" the
ornieran isolated mu and tne latter
a more ambitious elevation a moun
tain ton. Hot ween one '"kop" and
another in a range lurks a hollow
which is called a "nek," of which
Luia's Nek is an example, Hut it is
a mistake to imagine that a "nek"
is,a pass, as in that instance...
. tioogte , is a, favorite word 111
narratives . of open air life hi the
Transvaal, and naturally, since it is
merely a hillside, and one must as-
cond and descend man v a "hoogte" in
such a country as the Boers are tie-
feuding. A "kloof" is what wo cull
a canyon, and the word "vley" is ap-
plied liotb to a marsh and to the in-
cipient river that may find its source
there.
The word "laagte" is applied to
a formation that is characteristic of
the country and that may give 'the
English a lot of trouble. It i.-i a vast
depression, richly carpeted with
grass, and in the rainy season carry-
ing a fny inches, of water. The dan-
ger of it is that it abounds in deep pit-
falls, usually hidden by vegetation,
which would b'wallow, .up men. cannon
and horses on the smallest provoea
lion. J lilo Tribune.
Ki;iLV TO MR. HONS LUTTTIi.
Waim ki-. Mai l. 11. I.
Mimli (ilh. Hull).
To the F,ilitor of the Mai',i News:
Dear Sin: The letter written by
Mr. lions, which unpeaml in vour
ajer of March 3rd. in no way inval
idates my coiiiiiHinieatiim to the
Advertiser of Feb. 24th; miieo the
jiiitrailiclion by Mr. Haldwiu of Unit
p irt of my sliatiiient referring to
bin), is ci!im1orh;lnncod by my abso-.
Iv.le reassei lion that the facts were
ass l-i'iaied. .xaiuruiiv. on reaiiing
(bat, conl radiction on llie day if n-
cciviiig the paper, 1 went in search
ef Mr. lions, and visited the Slu riiT
n bis rompany. . Hy quoting, vor-
balim. certain portions of our con-
versation of Feb. 4th I endeavoured
i-,i-5ill to Ids mind the substance
of my slat oim nt, but in vain; and
I finally left him. with the impression
that the, Sheriff's memory concerning
our interview on the day in question
was somewhat impaired. During
,mr visit. Mr. Hons stated in presence
Lf the Sheriff, that he had interviewed
1 '
Mr. Hayselden. and that that gentle
man had fully corroborated the part
of mv statement which Imre reference
to him: a niece of informal ion for
which I herewith tender my thanks
to Mr. ; Hons. Certain portions of
Mr. Hons' letter are not quite clear
to me.
In criticising that part of my
.statement which refers to cases 4 and
5 u, apparentlv forgets that the
,n.0sent tense of tho verb "consider,"
;s not SVnoiivinous with the pant.
Am that'at the time when I wrote
niv i0tler to the Advertiser, bac-
teriological examination had sdreadv
proved cases a. (i and 7 to be cases
of Plague.
I must leave-others to explain why
any expression of opinion on my part
Li1()luu VliVi, deterred the Govern
ment officials from performing an
autopsy on which they , were deter
mined, when my representations in
regard to case 1 had not induced them
to make a thorough post-mortem
examination of tho bodv. .
That Dr. Weddiek, as reported by
Mr. Hons, should trouble to emphal
iesdly contradict an s'.ssertio: which
did not refer to him. is another my
tery which is left unexplained by
Mr. Hons, since, as I have stated
111 mv account 01 tne events 01
February 4th in reference to case
1, Dr. v eddick did not sec me
about tho case; in fact the first
remark concerning the case made to
me by Dr. Weddiek was during our
meeting at the house of Sain Yeag
at Kahului on Feb. 7th. three days
subsequent to the autopsy
A large portion of Mr. Hons' letter
is tidcen by attempts to prove di
agnoscs made by me, which I have
never attempted to deny; and when
his letter is carefully compared with
the statement which appeared in the
Advertiser, it will bo seen that with
the exception of the sheriff's contra
diction, the truth of my statement
villains undisputed.
ElJWAItn Alt.MlTAOE
AN AMEINDE HONORABLE.
In the last issue of the Nnws,
was stated with reference to Mis
Julia English that on Sunday night
Dr. Garvin was called in to see the
patient, and that when he arrived
she was dead. This is quite true.
but it is not the whole truth, and for
fear that the item, on account of its
brevity may be misleading, it is only
just to Dr. Armitage. her attending
physician,' to add that when he saw
her on Sunday afternoon, she ap
peared free from symptoms of plague
but having been summoned to see hi
again on Sunday evening, symptoms
had developed which caused him to
send at once or -Dr. Garvin who, as
we stated last week, went at one
to see her hut found her dead on his
arrival.
WHAT CHILDREN ARB 'FRAID OF
Lists of things, that -boys and girls
are afraid of have been printed and
distributed, and bv this means re
portshave been received from 15,000
000 children. . Those reports wer
made by simply checking off on the
list the things which they feared most
A tabulation of the reports show
that more of them feared thundi
and lightning than anything else
Next in order is the fear (if snakes
Then come in diminishing proportions
strangers, darkness,- fire, death, anl
inals, sickness, water, insects and
ghosts.
Naturally, the first , two have
terrors for Hawaiian children, on ui
count of the exemption of the Islands
from thunder storms and snakes.,
would be of educational value for tin
teachers of the Islands .to have
specially prcjuired lit . along the lines J j
above nulicated. from our cliililrcn
here.
It has been u long time since
the Xkws man was a small boy.
but according to the best of his
recollection, the onJy thing that he
wiis then really afraid of was ghosts.
However , the agonizing i.nd reid
terror that these uncanny things
exercised over his imagination wsv-i
quite equivalent to the whole list of
tilings that frighten children no.v-
days.
nsteehazy In the Transvaal.
Eslerhazy, the notorious ex-Colonel
'storha.y of Dr(yfus trial fame, is
now in the Transvaal fighting for the
Floors and holding a command r.t
Magersfontein. This is the first im-
l)orlant conflict since the civil war in
the United Slates, and the almost
simultaneous civil war in Mexico that
as afforded any opportunities to so-
idled soldiers of fortune, that is to
say, to men who are ready to sea
their swords to the highest bidder.
While their services were accepted in
this country at the lime of the strug
gle between the North and the South,
thev were looked at askance, and
Were, as a rule, 111 is 1 rusted. They
found a more congenial atmosphere
in Mexico, and it is doubtful whether
there was ever gathered together a
more extraordinary gang of ad ven
turers culled from every nation on
the face of the globe than those who
itt;iched themselves to the fortunes
of Emperor Maximilian.
SHORT SENSE.
CUI.'.HD FIl'JM KXCll ANr.K-e
For quick results use posters.
Judicious advertising r.hvnys pays,
no matter how, when, or where it is
done.
An advertisement that is concise.
terse, succinct, and to the point, is a
good advertisement.
If you do not think well of your own
wares how can you expect the good
opinion of others?
Good hard str.se in your ads is
otter than a long array of prices.
but prices are by uo means to be de-
Wlienever you run across a man
who does not believe that advertising
pays, do not waste any time on hi.n in
ui'jnuncnt. He isn't worth it.
A- cut in your advertisement,
illustrating your wares, is a vahu ble
aid to your description. -Naked Truth.
NOTICE
On account of the prevalence -of the
plague in Kahului and the possible
danger which some may fear from
the use of old soda water bottles and
boxes. I wis,h to state that I have
taken no bottles nor boxes from
Chinatown, Kahuhii, since Hie first
death was reported. All were left
there and destroyed in the fire. .
WOO doz. bottles with boxes ar
rived on the 'Centennial'' and were
not landed until after the tire. These
will be the only ones used by me un
til the old ones from all parts of
Maui are thoroughly disinfected. .
MAli SOBA & ICE WORKS.
BY AUTHORITY
Notice to the Public
Kahclci. Maci,
Feb.: lo. 1900
THE town of. Kiihului. Maui, is
declared to be infected by
bubonic plague. Strict quaran
tine regulations are now in force
and no traffic IN. or OUT of Kiih
ului will be permitted except by
authorized passes for indiyidiiiils
sind approved-permits for freight.
Through freight . from clean
vessels will be landed on the
Kahului wharf under strict quar
ijntine and shipped direct into
outside districts, without contact
with the infected portion of the
town. .
No niercliar.dise now in Ksi
liulu will, bo peniiittol to leave
tlie town excepting a limited
number of articles capable of
easy and absolute, disinfection.
' All mail matter, (local and
foreign), , leaving Kahului, will
bo thoroughly ' fumigated. All
dwellings, cesspools, closets and
drains should be put into a s;ini
tary condition, and cases of sick
ness be reported at once to the
nearest physician. .
By order of
DR.. C. L. GARVIN,
Ageni. Hoard of. Health.
HvED'TO T
SO
Mr.. joe:.on told mrs. jopso(4
n: 5ARD1N3. THE THEATCR.
Anil '--f Kmul WlWm InronnldM
nlo i:nii-.b in TnliP ".Iri " '"
Vnril. Vt: !i to llln t)lM;.it mid t'n .
liin:ili'il Ainnii'iiiont.
Mi l .!i hsoii." ftiUl Mf. .lolmorti
1 .t. . -1. . .... .Mi
i when he n'"t himie m i"- "lu
I ilei -1:011:1. just let mo tllke tills ODflyj
i;,:irii;r.iiv 0 remind .V" niriiln tlinti
I Ki i'i.iliihd to uo to the tlientee
(1:1s rvi'iiiiiL,'. It Is my desire and par
pw to M-rn-li the thi'ilter III time to.
i-.ic t;:c rise the ciiitilin eti the llrst.
su t. fur nun! la the whole coursd oC
n. y iimirii'd life, this evening:. I want,
to' see tin' hi'Klnnliitf (,f tlu' "how. I
was unable to tret aisle sent, nml I.
Teil miwillhur en this pni-tletilnr occa
sion to tritaiplo seven or eiht linof
fi'i'.ilirr men and women underfoot inw
1 t..u. 1.1 ikiltllltlift
oiv.it to retii'ii ni.v win j""1 " -
nfler the )i'ifiiriiinni-e has Ix'trim, t
when the orchestra Is rondcrlni,' shiv
ery m-.islf 11 ml the aliased mid slurring:
woman with the diamonds Is nVjnt
Inir the history or her life. Nor do IA
feel rcslciicil this fveiilnjr to the noc
t:nle of vour eoiiiplellns .voar toilet
on the street nfter we.stnrt. .last R
ir you ciort tie,' out -hi time for us to.
ni!il:e the break for the curs some
where In the neighborhood . of :U0,.
nud von' 1 1 do me favor." ' ,
Mrs. .InliBoli sullied and miperlntoiu!
ed the settimr of tho table. The iiliie
ivixscd off quietly. After dinner lit.
Jolisoo setthul himself In his easy clinl
iin.l laa-led himself In The Wiir. Dark
ness bestin to creep oil npneo, n tlio
huly novelists put it. nnd he IlliTml
r.nt'e.l the house. When be llniMheoll
The Star, he picked tip the copy of .'
"David llarmu" that Mrs. .lobsoiiuur
been rrad'mir and planned Into it.
"This Is the stulT they've been liink.
In" s-.ieli a row about." mattered Mr...
.lobson to himself when ho sat down
with the book, nail In less Hum cttfht
minute he had rend 12 pnires of It nudV
hud rmirotten Ills luiinu und numuer..
Mr. .Joiisoii had disnppeured up sllilr
fioine time previously, but he dhlu't:
even heur hoe- inovhijr iibotit in her
ilresslns roonm After awhile, howev
er, she called lilm. 1
If pel fi Into," slm Bald. "Aren V
jpu iroliur to lietrla to iUVsxT
fh .huh. roplleil Mr. .lonson. xurii-
litjj over a-piuro. Ho lir.il only tin iiiuis
t'.net idea of what, she' was siiylnj?. .
Ten inlmitea later 1 sho oalliid tolilmn
1:1 ill- ' '
"l am pretty nearly rendy'Ttlie said,,
"and it's 7:30. Aren't you fcihus to
chanire yo'.u- clothes.' t
'.'m-in. rh huh." answered Mr. Job-.
sua.: inieonscloiisl.V diirslii.u' into "hi.
poiKet and pnlllnir out another elyir...
whlcli he didn't lifeht. but chewed on.,
lie was too much engrossed with tho-
book.
At "!-" Mrs. Jobson tripped down 1
i tnlrs all ready. Even her gloves vero
buttoned.
"Well?"- ald she, gmlllng sit Mr...
.lobson. 1 .
"Iluh?" he imiulrod.- looking no ts
her. "Where are ynti KolnjrV"
"U seems to 1110 that we had Intend
ed attend;!-.;: some thenu-leiil perCuvnt-
anee tills eveniiiir. had we not?"
Mr. .lobson surveyed her In a mysti
fied way and tliun pulled 0111 his wateli.
"Hy jin. I believe there was some
thing said about the theater this even
Ins!" he exclaimed. "How's It happen'
Shut you'll' all ready? And why didn't:
you Just tip me off, by the way. that It:
was time for me to be fretting arrayed I
in purple sunt lino linen';"
"I called you several 'times," Bnld;l
Mrs. .lobson.
lie laid the book dawn and regarded
lies- severely.
"Called tne .several times, hoy?" salit.i
he skeptically, "Mrs. .lohson, 1 dipn't .
clalr.j to be trotting any youmror, like
some people 1 know, but It's niniply out.
of the ipiestlou for you to attempt to,
make me believe thnt I'm as deaf as a.
post. Don't you suppose I could hnvo,"
hoard you If you had leaned over the--banisters,
and talked above a whisper?.'?
I'.ut 1 see through your little game.
Just because I happened to remind you 1
this afternoon that it would be a good :
scheme for you to be ready 011 time yo'fl"
figured that It would bo fiouiy to snuiilc
up stairs at about o.'M. walk around on
tiptoe while you lixed up and permit: 1
me to doze off In my chair, here. Just:
ko's you could have it 011 me about not 1
being ready myself. S'pose you thought i
that wiis 11 really subtle scheme and
hard to see throiiifli. hey?"
And he' went muttering .up stairs to
get l-eaily. lie found the buttoug nil t
plat-ciMa ids shirt and everything laid i
out ou the ehsilrs. but clill lie muttered.
Mr, .lobson dii'n'i island In t lie hall,;
und shout up to him. "lley, there, nruc
you going to be sill nig!:t getting those-
duds on?" sis Mr. .lobson would h.-iva--.
done under reversed circumstances.
At t:2D he clomped down stairs wdthu
Ills tie very much mussed and nt oirv:--lde.
his hair parted In several illffvrriit 1
places ami with the sanguinary marks
of Fevernl cuts lie had Inflicted upon
himself In shaving still showing ijiritft
pi'omincntly. They reached the theater--at
S:-lo, and seven persons had to stand I
to let lhc:n pass to their seats. Mr.
Jobson rh and watched the reiiiaiiniei' i
of th play in gloomy silence. lie didn't .
my a. word 011 the way home. As he
got a bee line ou the bod. with tils hand ,
on the gas key, preparatory to putting - '
out the lights, however, lie addressed
her thus: ,
"M:-s. .lobson, a Joke's a Joke, hut a
put up Job is a different sort of proposi
tion. You weren't cut out for a light 1
comedienne. The next time you feel -laclluc'd
to be funny Just count up t.,
184 and take soveu stops to the rear.
That'll give you a chauce to decide to.i
pass up your elephantine manifesta
tions of humor. Hy the time you leura. 1
your limluitions you tire liable uot to. 1
have any husband, nnd he wou t bo hi 1
Out III11 either."-Wnst'ugton Srar.
V
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