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SOL. MILLER, EDITOR AND PUBLISHER.
THE CONSTITUTION AND THE UNION.
TE1MS $. PER ARMM, If IBTlffCl.
VftT.TTMl?. Y NTT HIRER AO I
WHITE CLOUD, KANSAS, THURSDAY, APRIL 18,1867. .
WHOLE NUMBER, 51$
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THE CABLE SOKO.
" st iohk - mtrrniL
O, Itmf l Bay -f Trinitf,
O, drear Wi, five ir!
14 M dow Ibio tli wbit-Iippd ttf
Tb toic of God u httrt
Ynrn world to world HU tooritn flj,
Tboi(btwiBd and shod with fin;
Tb iBgtl or ilia tormj ikj .
Ridta down tb tookea wire.
What laitatbe herald ortbe Lord
MTb world' lone tinfe ! done;
Cloco wedded br that oijshe cord,
111 ceniintnti are one.'
And eoe Is heart as one in blood
Eball all her people be;
The beads of hernia brotherhood
At claiped beneath the sea,
TbroBh Orient sett, o'er A Trie's plata.
And Asian woaatains borne.
The Tijor of the northern brain
I? hall nerre the world out wore.
From clime to clime, from shore to ihorr,
Shall thrill the mi-Ic thread;
The new Promethees steals once more
The fire that wakes the dead."
Tbrob on, strong poise of tbonder! beat
From aaswtrin beach to Leach;
Fate nations in thy aiadl heat,
And melt the chains of each!
WiU terror of the skjr store.
Glide tamed and demb below!
Bearrntlj, Ocean's earner dorr,
Thj errands to and fro.
Wear on, swift shnttle of the Lord,
Beneath the deep so fir.
The bridal robe of esrtb's accord
The faneral shrood of war.
For lo! the fallofocesn wall,
r?pace mocked and time oatran;
And roand the world, the thought ofall
h as the thooflit of one.
The pot's unite, the zones arret.
The too-net of stririo ceaie;
As on the sea of Galilee,
The Christ is w!.iiprio, Peace!
THE BBAYE BAYS OF OLD.
'For Romans, Ip Romt qaarret,
Spared neither land nor sold.
Nor son nor wife, nor limb nor life,
In the Lrare day of old.
Then none was for a prty;
Tkn alt vtrefor the Stxtt;
Then the crest man hvlpvd the ponrt
And the poor mm lored lbs great;
Then lands were fairly portioned;
Then spoils were fairly sotJ;
The Romans were like brothers,
In the brave days of oM
kkd il
A CLEAR CASE OF LITCK.
"A. good many (lingular things hap
pened during tue war." gaiil John, as lie
lighted hisaller-dinner cigar ; "bntsocno
how, I contider my own caso abont the
funniest thing of all.
"Ah!" aid I; "how so!"
"Did it ever occnr to yon that it was
little od J that in so short a time I should
bare got to be a partner in the fircj, and
married man. and all that sort of
things V
"O I yon speculated."
"Not a bit of it ; or rather. I did, and
I didn't ; for yon know I detest specula
tion. I've even made old Mitraille swear
off."
"So far, it's all very clear; hut if yon
havi secured French wife, and a rich
one, I could understand a little plain
Enelish."
Before I went to the war, John Devel-
io and I bad been fellow-clerks in the
banking house of Mitraille & Co., in
New York. A slight lameness prevented
John from going into the army; and an
ntter bienco of capital prevented him
from proposing for the band of the pretty
Lucille, though I always believed that he
bid mora to fear from ber groff old papa
than the young lady herself.
Poor "as be wag, and on a moderate
salary, when I returned at the end of the
war a good deal lamer than ever John
was before it I fonnd my cbutn in the
fall enjoyment ofall bis heart had longed
for, and with a brown stone front to en
joy it in.- So when he volunteered some
thing which promised to explain the mys
tery, mj cariosity 'res on fire in a mo
ment. John jtw a right good fellow,
and I did not envy him a particle ; bat
I most say I was ccrioas about it.
Yon know a good deal what I was af
ter, when yon went away: and my chfbce
of getting it then seemed abont as far off
at the Presidency. It was a clear case of
Inck, I, tell yon, and very little more.
Old Mitraille always liked me pretty well.
thoogb'I was hardly the man he would
have chosen for a son-in-law; and I kept
bis private, yon know. Yon know all
abont that unbounded gold speculation
in 1862 cad 1863; well, he bad somehow
got into it, steady, old, hard-headed
banker as he is.- Almost everybody went
in more or less.
The old man rather missed it ones or
twice, and got hit pretty hard, though
no one but myself knew anything abont
''' hard, indeed, that I was more than
a little alarmed for the result.
I got it into my head, abont that time,
that I would like to run down to Wash
ington, and take a look at the Torts and
camps. Somehow, it always galled me
a good deal that I could not take y
part with the mt, and 1 wanted to ee
the thing, anyhow. So I called at the
Cjjuice
house to see Lucille, and set a short for
lough, and I succeeded surprisingly well.
That is, I didn't see as much of Lucille
as I wanted, bnt the old gentleman gave
ma leave of absence readily, and added :
''Suppose something may happen
whiles yqn are dare ; ey ? Yoa send me
a telegram. Quick !"
"Yes," I replied; "hut yon know the
War Department don't allow a fellow to
send over the wires jost what he wants
to."
"0. never mind all dat," said Mitraille;
"just you sends sometings good or bad,
no matter, jnst de word. I understand
mighty qnick, ha! ha! Never yon
mind de War Department."
"And so," continued John, "off I went.
wiiimui a very cionr lues oi wnat was
expected, or how I was to do it."
And now the rest of it sonnds tremen
dously like a page from Munchausen,
bnt it's all a clear historical fact. Mit
raille wrote a letter which got to Wash-!
ington about as soon a I did, urging me
to Keep my eyes and ears open, promis
ing that if I sent him anything of impor
tancc, be would go halves with me on the
profits. I saw by that, how terribly
nervous he was getting, and concluded
that affairs must have been worse with
him than I knew of. Nevertheless, I be
gan to be a trifle excited myself; and
though I bad a sort of honor of specula
tion, especially of gold gambling, I com
menced looking around me pretty sharp
ly for items. Among other adventures,
I fell in with old Sam Gorham. of Cin
cinnati, one of onr correspondents, and a
nephew of his, a qneer, awkward spoon
of a fellow, and wo went round sight-see
ing in company.
Nothing would do for either uncle or
nephew" but a crntinnnl succession of
cocktails, and I had to leave them in
th-ir rooms soon after dinner, somevhat
the worse for wpnr, while I continued my
search for infornration under difficulties.
I didn't find out anything in particular,
nil tint night nr the next forenoon ; bnt
I saw the sights pretty effectually, and
nbotit noon I went into my friends' room,
to stir thera np. I found the nenhew
lolling disconsolately on a chair, and the
nP'lc iu bi with a high fever, the natn
mi ir-un ui me uny neiore. me liope-
lul youth ben the story of Im trihnla
tion. by stating that lie had expected hi-
annt there that day, bnt ha I received a
letter fmra her, saying that sbe hail been
delayed, and could not come at once.
I asked him what ibe doctor siid of
his nnrle.
"Oh, the old man's right sick, and I
reckon I'd better telegraph to Aunt Sally
to come right away."
On the plea of a splitting headache, he
begged me to send his message, and I
thought I would send at the same time to
Mitraille fc Co. Well, his telegram,
savhig the direction, read :
"Don't wait for anything. Uncle
Sam !r very sick indeed."
While mine was simply :
"Nothing stirring. Having good
time."
Now, how on earth those two litllo af
fairs got interchanged, is a mystery to me
to this day. Perhaps I did it ; maybe
he did it ; perhaps it wag done at the
telegraph office; I don't know; bnt twist
ed tbey certainly were, and somehow both
of them passed the cennrs.
When Mitraille opened his, he straight
way imagined that something had gone
to smash in Washington, and that I had
taken a nest way of giving him a hint,
and ho ruthed ont and bought all the gold
hN credit would cover.
He wrote me a letter by that mail,
giving on ncconnt of transactions whoe
magnitude almost nude my hair turn
gray; and while ha thanked me for my
hint, he begged me to be sure that my
information was .correct. L thought at
first that he was crazy and then I got
pretty near crzy myself, thinking of
tvhat might be the consrqnences of the
mistake. The first thing I did this was
the next day was to rush into Riggs',
and ask the latest gold prices.
Guess my delight, when I-found them
fairly jn in ping upwards. It was wonder
ful ! Still, 1 was terribly nervous, for
all sorts of rumors were afloat, and I
knew that gold could fall as fast as it
could rise. The feeling grew on mo un
til, pretty nearly half-demented, I went
into the telegraph office at Willard's, and
dashed off
"It's all a fell, and a big one."
Well, (he old gentleman took that jnst
as he had the other, and not only sold ont,
but went short to the line. It was the
luckiest thing in the world, for snre
enongh, within forty-eight boars things
did go down, heels over head.
I began to feel superstitious; there was
something very uncanny about it ; and I
packed my kit and made 'fast time for
New York. I did not attempt any ex
planation, bnt I steadily resisted all the
old gentleman's entreaties to go on uith
it any further.
The net figure was a handsome one, I
tell you, and there was very little trouble
abont making the other arrangements,
after my bank account was made up.
;uy nonored latner-in-iaw naa ine nn'i
et faith in my jadgment ; bnt I told Lu
cille all abont it. What's more. I dont
and won't speculate, and won't do busi
ness for any firm that does. It' all a
clear case of lock, I tell you.
John threw the stump of his cigar into
the ashes, and I pulled away at mine.
wondering if there was any luck in get
ting that bit of shell in my ankle.
m ,
A new County recently created in Ala
bama, has received the name of "Dixie."
CVfW yy
mmrmmttim.
CUCrJw ir ',o'f'r,
THE WAX-VALXaxinS.
Com hilbr, m lillU iitk-tjti mtiin;
Lock jonr diatpltd hiail fa mtafl,
Aed tell at, wilhot radiap.
Th what and wbara of joor VaUatiaa.
"3Ij lova li a boatiwaiaa mala on tha Strn,
A maar-wcf'i.inia boM," stid tb
"Heart or oak aal hand of iron
O, nt'a the Valeatlat Tor me!"
Linen lo me. brart-breakla; flaalelo,
Willi yoer wliio rose ia yoar leoeiae hair;
Fain woaM I kaow jour lorer'a calling
Who It yonr Valentine, wbit aad where!
"O, mr trne.IoTe'a nam ! Ciar. Zour
Down at the camp with htm joa'U meet
Aod whea ha aooaria oa hia bogle bora,
A thousand riflemen spring to their feel."
Good morrow to joe, mj peBStre girl.
With the crow.wiog hair aad violet ejet,
Rolij lips and teeth of pearl:
Tell me yonr trae.lore'a name and golse.
"Sere, mr joong man's aame ia Easaioiro O'BaJia;
And wiih hit green feather he looked to fine.
When the dramt were beating and the colon firing
O! tlearea be good to m Valenlinel"
Thus ettr it goet on, the telf-tane'etar?:
Lore and War walk hand.ia-haad:
For-et.me.nolt on the field of glorj,
Under the laurel's shade expand.
(From the Toledo Blade.)
IVASBY.
The Jfesro Vote Mr. Nasby in Imita
tion of Wade Hump ton Tries to Con
ciliate the African The Result of
the Venture:
Post Orns, CoxrEDEnrr X Roads,
(wich is in the Stait nv Kentucky.)
March 23, 1S67.
I hev made many sudden and rather
'atrordinary changes in pnlitix some so
very Midden that the movement perdnost
conjestion uv the conshence. I rekollect
wnnst uv advokatin free trade and high
protective tariff, all within twelve bonri.
(I made a speech in a agricultooral dee
strik uv Noo York in the forenoon at 10
A. M., and in- a raannfacturin town in
Pennsylvany in the evenin, our platform
bein so construktid that both sides cood
find a endorsement in it,) and hev per
formed many other feats uv moral gvm
'naatiks ; hnt this last change I hev bin
called upon to make is probably thesnd-dene-it.
List week Toosdy, Deekin Po
grani. Captain McPelter and I wuz en
gaged in riddin the Corners uv niggers.
We hed endoored em ez longez we thot
possible, and determined on standin it no
longer, belectin three wich we wuz sat
isfied hed too ranch spelliu-book into em
to be enslaved agin, we wuz preparin
notises to be served onto em, orderin em
to leave in twenty-four hours, when I re
seeved in the northern mail a letter mark
ed "Free Alex. W. Itandell. P. M. G
I knowJ it wnz offishel to-wunst that
blessid signatoor is on my commisshnn,
and I've contemplatid it too often to be
mistaken in it. Its contents wuz brief,
and rnn thus:
"To all Postmasters in the Southern States :
The nipgera her votes cousiliashen is our beat
holt. See to it."
This breef, tho not hard to be under
stood order, wnz sealed with the offishel
real uv the Post Offis Department stampt
into putty instid nv wax, to-wit : a loaf
nv bread, under a roll uv batter, with ten
hands a grabbin at it. I comprehended
tho situation at site, and set abont doin
my dooty with both Roman and Spartan
firmness. "Deekin," sez I, tearin up the
notices, "these n'ggers we hev misunder
stood. They are not a inferior race
they are not descendants' nv Ham and
Higer it wuzn't Panl's ijee in sendin
back Onesiracs to condemn him to serv
itood we hev misunderstood the situa
tion, and mnst make amends. The nig
ger is devoid uv smell, and is trooly a
msn and a brother !"
"Wat?" sed the Deekin, tippin back
in amazements
"Jest wat I say," sez I, "read that,"
and I flung him the letter.
The upshot uv the conference wich loi
tered wuz the callin uv a meetin the next
nite, at wich all the Ethiopians nv the
Corners wnz invited and urged to be pres
ent. .
The trouble wuz to git the niggers to
attend the meetin. The fnst one I spoke
to lafft in my face, and aakt me how long
it wnz sence I bed helpt hang a couple
uv nigger, by way uv finisbin off a cele
brasben. Pollock, the Illinoy 'store
keeper, got hold nv it, and told Joe Big
ler, and Joe swore that ef the niggers
bedn't any more sense than we give em
credit" for, in sposio we cood bamboozle
em so cheep, he shood go back to the
old beleef, to-wit : That tbey wnz only a
sooperior race nv monkeys, after all ; and
by nite every nisger in the visinity wuz
postid thoroughly, and ont uv all uv era
I cood only git four who would promise
to attend, and them the Deekin hed to
pay 82 apiece to. To give it eclaw, I
promised one uv em 85 (to be paid at
the close uv the meetin) to sit on the
stand with me. wich, bein a very poor
man, and hevin a sick wife in a ahanty
near by, who wnz snfferin for medicine,
(wich he coodeat git without money,) be
accepted.
At this pint an ijee struck me. I re
membered Philadelfy, and determined to
hev a scene rival in the Couch and Orr
biz n is. "Another thing, Cof, under
stand that it's a part nr the bargain that
when in my speech I turn to yoo aad
stomp, yoo must rise- and embrace se."
"Wat r" ex he.
"Fall into my arms, lotioilike yon
understand jut ex tno we wei long lost
brothers I" :
"'Sense me 1" seil be. "I'ia a mity
low nigger, aad wants to hny de old wo
man soma qninine, and wood .do asos'
any ting foah dat, bnt, golly, dat's too
much 1"
"Not a cent," sed I, sternly aasoomin
my most piercinest gaze, "onlesa this is
included !"
"Well," returned he, sulkily, "efl
T l T . a. . is tf
must, x apecK i must, out, gunj
The nite arrived, and the meetia-honsa
wnz full. We tbot fust nv holdin it in
me cnarei nv tne uotiege, ont give no
the ijee z impracticable, er, owin to the
dillytormts nv onr Northern friends in
forwardin sicb snbscripsbens ez they hev
raised, we beven't got no further with the
bildin tban laym the corner-stun. In the
front wuz the four niggers, all in clean
shirts, and on the stand woe the nigger I
hed engaged. Over the platform, wuz
the follerin mottoes :
"In Yoonion tber is strength ForPresident
in 1868, Fernando Wood. For Vice President,
Fredrick Duglis."
"In the nigger, strength In the Canscas
shen, beauty In the mnlatter, who is trooly
the noblest uy the human species both."
In addishen to these, we dugnp all the
old mottoes wich Jefferson writ, abont
yooniversel liberty and sicb, wich bedn't
bin quoted in Kentucky for twenty years.
ana poena em up ; in brief, bed Wen
dell Phillips' blessid spent bin a boverin
over that meetiu-hoose, it wood hey
smiled approvinly.
I spoke to em elokently on the yooni
versel brothorhood uv mankind, holdin
that watever else cood be sed, Adam wnz
the fathor nr all mankind, and that the
only difference between a white man and
nigger wnz, the nigger wnz sun burnt.
The nigger, I remarkt, wnz. undoubHd
y. origenally white, bat hevin bin, sence
his arrival in this country, addicted to
agricultooral ptrsoots, he bed become
tinned to a degree wich. tho it marred
his physikle beauty, did not interfere
with his sterlin goodnis nv heart. Ther
hed bin differences between the races at
times tber bed bin onplessantnises wicb
poone regrettid ui3ri:l.-PVane ,Wi
nv tne'Corners hed not alios bin ez con
sidrit ez I cood hev wished. They hed
flogd sever.il uv em, nnd hung many
more, and in times past hed held em in
slavery and sich, but that shood not be
thot uv at this happy time. It wuz con
stooshnel to do these things then, and
Kentucky wnz eminent'y a law-ahidin
State. "Here," sez I, "on this platform,
with the flag nv our common country
over me, I declare eternal friendship to
me colored man, and to seel the declare
shen I thos embrace "
The obstinit nigger didn't stir a step.
"Come op and fling yoor arms aronnd
me. yoo blsck cuss," sed I, in a stage
whisper. "Come up 1"
"No yoo dont, boss 1" sed Ihe nigger,
in a loud voice, wich was andible all over
the cburch, and holdin out his hand. "I
can't trust yoo a brossid minit. "Gib
me de 85 fnst. Yoo owe dis chile foah
dollars now fo sawin wood fo yoah post
offis, and ef we's a gwine to hab our rites,
de fas yoose I she! pnt mine to will be
gittin dat money. Pay np, fqs, and de
'brace afterward. I can't do aich a dis
greeable ting widont de cash in advance."
This rather destroyed the effect. The
unities wuzn't preserved. The niggers
in front bust out in a tortaring laff, and
Pollock and Bigler rolld in convulsions
uv laffture, in wich half uv our Deonle
jined. Me a stsadin pertrified, in the
attitood ur embracin, and that cussed
nigger standin with his band extended
for ibe money, with the Deekin and Bas
com horror struck jist behind, formed a
tabloo ttich woz more strikin tban pleas
ant. The meetin wnz to-wunst adjourned,
for it wuz evident to the 'dullest compre
bensben that nothin more coodent be done
that nite. Ez yoonal, I failed for want
uv capital. Hed I bin possessed nr the
paltry sum or five dollars, how different
wood hev bin the result ! Perchance we
may, thro that defishency, idso Kentucky.
It most never occur agin my salery must
be raised. I can't make brix without
straw.
Joe Bigler met me next morning and
remarkt that be regrettid the occurrence.
ez be ardently desired to see the two races
a pullin together. "The fault, Perfeseer,"
sed he, "wuz in not managin properly.
The next, time yoo want a 'spectabfe nig
ger to sit on the platform with yoo and
t no xieeam, or kiss or eeantitee yoo git
him drnnk. He'll do it then, probably
I know be will. Ef he's drunk enuff.
he'll hurrah for Johnson, and it's possi
ble to git em down to the pint nr votin
with yoo. Lord 1 how whiskey drags a
man down. Sea wat it's brot yoo to !"
and the insultin wretch rolled off. laffin
boisterously. "Git em drnnk, Perfesser,"
be yelled at me ez long ez he cood see
ma.
We don't intend to give it np. Big
let's advice won given in jest, but, never
theless, I sbel act upon it. Whiskey is
wat brings white aaea to ns, ami ef a
white man kin be thus capebered. why
not a ngger ? The Afrikin hean't got
rs far lo fall to git down to onr level,
and it'll take less to bring hint. Bascora
ordered five barrels to day, wich I spose
tbe Administrashen will pay for. We
hev ye$ the Noo York Custom Hour,
and more nr tbe perkisits ranst be rooted
for politikle purposes.
PrrBoutna V. Nasbt. P. &L.
(Wich is Postmaster), aad likewise Pro
fessor nr iJiblikie foliticks in the
Sutbera Ckiaikh 4 Military IkuUteot.
IsefitLanfc Mmm;
Veal Pot Pie. Oat ud some veal.
wash and season it with pepper and salt;
i:-. tt.. :j -r . ?.t. .
tiuo mo oiuca ui jour pot wiiii paste,
put in the veal with some pieces of paste
rolled out and cnt in squares, cut up some
butter rolled in flour and add to it, pour
in as much" water as will cover it, and
lay a sheet of Daste on tbe top, leaving
an opening in the centre; put tbe lid on
the pot and put it over a moderate fire.
let it cook slowly till the meit is done;
place the soft crust oa a dish, then put
the meat over it, and on the top lay the
hard crust, with tbe brown side up.
Serve the gravy in a boat. To have the
crust of a pot pie brown at the top, put it
on a tew coals before the hre, nnd turn
it frequently.
Carbot Podding No. 1. One pound
of carrots grated, the apertures of the
grater being one-eighth of an inch, oth
erwise the flesh will not pass through.
To this ponnd of carrots add one pound
of wheat flour, one pound of suet, and
one pound of currants. Mix together,
and boil the same as plum puddinir.
When brought to tbe table, a little but
ter-sauce is necessary, bnt no sweetening
is rrquirea.
Carrol Pudding No. 2. To one pound
of grated carrots add a pound of flour, a
quarter of a pound of suet and two oun
ces of currants; mix, and boil like plum
pudding. With a little sauce, this
makes a cheap and palatable pudding.
Giblet Pie. Wash clean yonr gib
lets, put them in a stew pan, season
with pepper,. salt and a little butter roll
ed in flour; cover with water, -stew till
very tender. Line the sides of Your pie
dsh with paste, put in tbe giblets, and
li the gravy is not quite thick enough,
add a little more butter rolled in flour.
Let it boil once, pour in the gravy, put
on the top crust, leaving an opening in
the centre of it in lbs form of a square;
ornament this with leaves of the paste.
Set the pie in tho oven, and when tbe
t-1 ik la iroob tak'b's'i. to'tletable?""
Beep Stewed with Onions. Cut
some tender beef in small pieces, and
season it with pepper and salt, slice some
onions and add to it, with water enough
in the stew-pan to make a gravy; let it
fctew slowly till the beef is thorouffhlv
done, then add some pieces of bntter roll
ed in flour to make a rich gravy. Celd
Deal may be done in this way, only the
onions mnst be stewed first and tbe meat
added. If tbe water should stew
too much, put in a little.
away
Baked Affle Dumplings. One teacnp
of lard, one and a half of water, little
salt for crust; eight tart apples, pared.
qnartered and cored; roll the crust and
cut in circular pieces, and pnt in four
quarters. Wet the edge of the dough
and close np tightly. Bake in a slow
oven to a nice brown. These mar be
served with cream and sngar; syrup, or
a sweetened sance, are excellent.
To Boil a Goose. After it is well
dressed, singe it thoroughly; have ready
a dressing prepared of bread crumbs, sea
soned with salt and butter, with tbe ad
dition of two finely chopped onions, and
a little sage. Fill the body and close it
firmly; pnt in cold water, and boil gent
ly till tender. If the goose is a young
one, an honr will be sufficient time.
Crtstalizino Glass. To one quart
of water add one ponnd of alum; boil
till all tbe alum is dissolved; add a little
indigo, and then pour it into a flat dish
and place the glass in it. Let it stand
till tbe crystals are formed, which will
take about twenty-four hours. Peach
stones, cinders, heads of wheat, oats, etc.,
may be thus crystalized.
Mint Sauce. Choose some yonng
mint, pick and wash it; chop it very fine,
and pour on enough vinegar to wet it.
To every gill of vinegar allow two gills
of brown sugar. The sugar should be
dissolved in tbe vinegar, then poured on
the mint
Tapioca Jelly. Take a quarter of a
pound of tapioca, swell it thoronghly in
a pint of water, then add a glass of wine,
with sugar to the taste. Tapioca, simp
ly swelled iu milk and eaten with a sance,
is light and nutritious food.
Vegetable Otstehs. Slice and boil
in water, about twenty minuter, or till
tender; add salt, pepper, butter; and af
ter this has boiled a little, just before
serving, add cream or rich milk.
Linen rags should be carefully saved,
for tbey are extremely useful in sickness.
If tbey have become dirty and worn by
cleaning silver, etc., wash thera and scrape
them into lint.
Mcmsa. One pint of milk, three
eggs, one cupful of yeast, flour enough
to make it as tnick as fritters, 'lo be
raised over night, if for breakfast.
Bbeaktast Dish. Beat one egg, add
a teaspoooful of salt, pour in two-thirds
pint of water, slice some,bread, dip it in,
and fry in a little bntter.
Nahkeev Dtc. Boil equal parti of
annatto and common potash in water
until dissolved. This will produce the
psle reddish buff so ranch admired.
Trsstabest Pars. Wet fine paper
on both sides with a eolation made of
resin and spirits of wine. It should be
done with a feather.
Cfjc Jim of Cfeiitflf,
"THE OBSAT VSXSQVfX."
ivrruas to ritb aaiM ntrrn ar w. a. lawaas.
Who it the State Department spj,
S rerr leea efearaad eye.
Who lrare U Etuope oa the iljl
McCraciea.
Who helped me lo rof smokier, ost.
Aad prored himself a ready lost,
la hriagiof dirt thinaa about!
MeCrackea.
Whea office-seekers howled for (cod,
Aod waoted Miaisterial blood.
Who fare mo meaas to qaiet tha brood?
MeCrackea.
Who wrote like aa illiterate fool.
From tome Coafed'rate cross road school
Aad jet maje mo hit reajr tool!
McCrukea.
Who broa-ht down Motley with his quill,
Aad ataadered him wi'th jast Ihe skill.
Which senred the Stat, Drpartmeat well?
r MeCrackea.
Who ceased the tranileot blath of shame,
(Which pasted away like meteor flame,)
Whea Samaer showed the world my jarae?
AtcCrackea.
Who broa-ht my Marphy to his kaeet,
Aod set him rotlinr, with snch ease.
To show hia wiliiofaess to pleese?
MeCrackea.
Who earned McNtth to bow to low,
Lest I shoald strike the fatal blow,
Aad Andy giro him leare to (of
MeCrackea.
Who made oar Uploa criage aad ereep,
As if hit crime was atealiag sheep,
Fo that his place he still might keept
MeCrackea.
Who made all Europe laagh aad aqoat,
Aad rilled iu courts with mirthful root,
.- Which alt iu priaU discoursed about!
MeCrackea.
Who set this Coogresa on my track.
And piled ill Jacobias oa my back,
Aad waked iu dead dackc" ap to qeackf
MeCrackea.
Who do "'' a! aa'er been bora,
To ba; on me this general scorn,
A3 make my office so forlornl
' MeCrackea.
"Have yon any lubricating drops for
a bronchial dehciency, said Mrs. Part
ington to Dr. Withingtou, at the corner.
"Is the cold deep seated ?" said the Doc
tor, blandly. "I don't know how deep
it i," she saiJ, with a bark like an Es
quimaux dog, "but it is loud enough.
What a time for colds this is, to bo 6ure ;
I declare I am completely exaggerated
with my congh." "Yoa need an expec
torant." said the Doctor." "I expect so,"
replied she; "but whether it will do any
good or not, must depend upon how it
infects me; bnt I will take a box of atro
cious lozengera, any bow, which I have
beard spoken of as melifluous." Ike
spent his time in playing with the dumb
bells, and tbe old lady asked the Doctor
to excuse the liberty he took, because the
boy was so given to jimelastics.
Some time ago a planter, a abort dis
tance from Memphis, gave a party to the
young folks in his neighborhood. It was
a gay time, and in tbe coarse of the even
ing the boys and girls played forfeits.
While this was going on, it chanced that
the son of the planter, a nice, modest fel
low, bad to claim a forfeit of some of the
girls, bnt he was overcome with diffidence.
"Go ahead, John," said tbe planter,
"and kiss some of tbe girls."
John hitched from one foot to the other,
blushed,- and finally blurted ont :
"I I never kissed a white girl, fa-
tne."
The laughter that ensued may be im
agined. A man had received a large lot of lob
sters, fresh and lively, when a boy stood
looking at the critters, accompanied by
his dog. "Suppose you put your dog's
tail between tbe lobster a claws 7 said
tbe man. "Agreed," said tbe boy. Tbe
peg was extracted from tbe claws, and
tbe dog's tail inserted. Away went tbe
dog off borne, howling at the squeeze his
tail got from the lobster. "Whistle your
dog back, yon young scamp," said the
man. "Whistle yoor lobster back,"
cried tbe boy, and absquatulated. The
boy made a lobster supper that night.
Various instances have been cited to
prove bow lazy a man can be and live,
but it remains for a Michigander to cap
the climax. One hot day dnring the
heated terra last summer, he was observ
ed to throw himself down on tbe grass
under the spreading branches of a shade
tree, and exclaim emphatically to himself:
"There! breathe if yoa want to I
shan't!"
A bright-eyed, three-year-old boy said
to his mother, tbe other day :
"Mamma, isnt Heaven a beautiful
place?"
Dotiur Mother "Yoa don't know
anything abont that place, ray son."
Bright-eyed Boy "Ob, yes, I, do.
Wasn't I there, raarama, when I was
being made f
An Irish dragoon officer, oa hearing
that hia widowed mother bad married
siner ba quitted Inland, exclaimed :
"Mnrtber 1 I bona aha won't hare a son
older than rae ; if aha doer, I shall lose
the estate."
Cootxdrcx. Wa beard a good one,
tha other night, at the Theatre. "Why
are the United States like a broken
chain V Answer "Because they need
another link oa," (Liaeoln.)
$ax ie imuK,
Plan Hug Treca, in
Capt. Andarson, of 'Cincinnati.,.!
cently submitted to the Horticultural
Society of that city, the following rs-
;ort on planting trees, via:
Tbe best time to transplant decidaoaa
trees, is as soon in the fall aa tbe leaves
begin v, drop, or cease to work. Pro
tect the roots from the action of tho
storm and winds. Tha ends of the bro
ken roots should be made as smooth Hm
possible, as a smooth cut will heal over,
while a rough one is verr ant to daen.
In pruning the branches of trees, tha
cuts should be made clean and smooth.
In moving trees, it is best to cut back
the leaders and top branches; the lower
branches should only be cut when neces
sary to give shape to tbe trees. Severe"
pruning does not kill trees, while, they
often die from want of pruning. Under
draining and subsoiling are very benefi
cial in preparing boles for tree. Tho'
soil aronnd newly planted trees, at least
as far oat as the roots extend, abonld bo
worked well every month or two during
tbe growing season, and in the fall ba
well mnlched with long, green manure!
It was suggested by Mr. Martin that'
the mnlching should not be close round'
the tree, as it becomes a harbor for mice,
which gnaw the bark during the' winter.
DE8TR0Y1X0 DESTRUCTIVE rVSEOTS.
Dr. Martin called attention to the rem
edy discovered by Mr. Best, of Dayton,
which is claimed to be perfectly sura to
kill tho worms that are so destructive to
peach trees, and the enrculio and other
insects that destroy plums and other
fruit.
Dr. Green stated that Mr. Best showed
the best plums that were brought to the
city, and he believed there was virtue ia
his remedy, which is kept a secret. Any
one, however, can procure a receipt from
him (Dr. Green), by simply signing a
declaration that be will not tell it, and
will pay Mr. Best 85, provided it accom
plishes what is promised. It is a strong
alkaline remedy, and will not injure tha
trees or tbe fruit.
Plaktiso Stbawbebries. Plant ia
tbe spring and plant early, is my advice
with strawberries.
Strawberry plants, unlike most others,
may be set with more or less success all
through the summer; but I would never
plant them in large quantities except
for special reasons at any other time
tban in early spring. Planted at that
season, they are, to my mind, tbe easiest
of all plants to make live and grow;:antT
planting strawberries is one of the simp
lest of all planting operations.
Some people plant at mid -en barer,"
and meet with success. Soma plant ia,
tbo fill, and succeed; but many, wlio
plant at either of these seasons, meat
with failure or only partial suceeeer'whira
those cases which do succeed, bsDDese
more by accident by catching a prona
tions time, or by labor and Care' in' wa
tering, shading, kc, as to make it cost
ly; while if done in early spring, there ia
scarcely a chance of failure, and the very '"
minimum oi taoor ana expense.
Tbe strawberry is a hardy, almost aar
Alpine plant, and its roots and leaves
are excited into growth at a low tempe
rature and quite early in tbe spring it
commences to push out new fibres froaV
its main roots. The best of all periods
for its removal is, in my opinion, imme
diately preceding this action of roots:
then, if all the roots are taken up and
properly planted, yon lose little or noth
ing in tbe removal, and ertry week'a d-
lay detracts something from tha fatqra.,
growth and strength of tha plant ot ita
progeny. Nevertheless the strawberry ia
more tractable tban almost any other i
plant in cultivation; but wheo'it It Mr.
easy to plant iu the spring as any" other ,
season, always give it tho preerne.
Rural World.
To' Westers Editors. Keep it ba-
fore tbe people, that to plant the common
Black Locust is to reap certain' disap
pointment. Hundreds of acres have beea '
torn up by the roots ia Illinois", dariag
the last five years, because the borer had -
reduced their handsome tops to unsight
ly stumps. Those planted in" tbe early
settlement of Kansas Ira' universally '
sharing tbe same fate. The seed is eaai- :
!y gathered, they grow rapidly, raaka i
oeaniuui cop, are neaHnial in their ell- j
matic influences, and are every other war
desirable; but it is absolutely certain l
that they will fail after growing a fear
yesrs on tbe prairies. WesUra am -'
know this, but new immigrant froaa that .
East do not.
The Honey Locust which crows ia tkav
forests of all tbe West, aad la araaaaf-'
itb long woody thorn, has. ae) Car' aa' -"?
tested, proven safe for opea caltivatioeu '
tint it u believed that tha Osaga Or
ange is our best tree for wind braaka
around dwelling, stock yards or orck-
run. it trrowa certainly and ranidlr.
will attain a height of twenty to fortr '
feet if not trimmed, aad a belt twenty
feet in width will, with its iannataraWa
and matted branches, fores a screen sec
ond ia raloa only to evergreens, whik it
can be growa ia much less time end at
(ar Jess expense. .&
Tomatoes abd Boas .JDirnier fa
the'lTew England faraiaHrraBhat i
wbea tomatoes art growiag-'aaae aac ap'
pie tree, tbe soiers wul aot trenwe laa-
trse. He plants tomatoes by tha
to prsvsat tbesa.
1
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