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STATE JOURNAL. WEDNESDAY EVENING JUNE 20. 1894.
BENTS! SITUATIONS ! REAL ESTATE! AUCTION SALES t & OTHER. CLASSIFIED ADS. Thi TorctA St .4T Jotjbxajo guarantees, every day it is printed, to give a local circula tion more than double that of any other Tope ka paper, and by far H tha.a mil Oik.r Dalles Combined. This makes this paper the cheapest, as well as the best dally advertis ing medium in Topeka. the cia-suted adverlt toauu bmow costing but FIVE CENTS A LINE, er 30 cents a line (or a week; M eaaU by I mnnth. City circulation everyday exceeds 6.000 totas circulation over h.uou. Sworn detailed statements of clrculatioo sentod on application. t Ca.il Hi J sue an v afternoon between 4 6. the handsomest, fastest, most perfect nieo of printing machinery in Kansas a Web Perfect In press, which pr nts from two to three ooss pieU 8-page patters a -acond. SITUATIONS WANTED FREE. Are you In need of work If so. you are at liberty to ue these columns tor assistance in that direction. While this notice appaar.. the 81 ate Joi'RjfAL wiil publish free on Saturday. Monday and Tuesday, for Topeka or Kansas people, aii notices of "Situations Wanted." not exceeding live lines, or thirty-nvo words, in length. Provided that all advertisements of this nature are handed in previous to tn o'clock Saturday morning: also on Wednes day. Thursday aud Friday, all advertising of tins class handed in by tea o'clock Wednesday morning. .No advertisements of this nature to be started except on Saturdays and Wednesdays. Jo 00 IlKaiion Is incurred on the nart of the advertis er. No worthy and needy man or woman need hesitate to take advantage of this offer. .No on lu bus.tiess or havunz employment Is expected to take ad van tace of it. but all others invited tm avail themseives freely. TANTEI Situation as clerk In either dry goods or grocery store. Four years expe perieuce in general merchandise. tiood re commendation. Address "E. E." this office. AlTAM'tU To do washing or ironing or w housework by a colored women. Will do any kind of work. 410 Madison st. WANTED HELP. 'AM El) liirl or woman for general kltch- W r ANT ED Girl for general housework; no washing or ironing; laa Mauisou. ANTED Woman for general housework lu small family, white. Inquire at Clay. AYTANTED Concert people at once to Join medicine show. .1. c Hrowniield. M. D., (The Nation's Healer) 2ut Wait St., Auburndale. "YrANTEl (Jood dining room ami kitchen girls white southeast corner Eight and Qutnoy. "A.N 1 ED A good gin in a candy store. 724 Kansas ave. WANTED M ISC ELL AN EO US. "rANIKD Use of two or three rooms for v v caring for house two or three mouths: good care guaranteed. Address "Care," this omce. AY TA.NTEl) A first class baby carriage, must uo ciieap lor cssh. inquire at Ohio house w A.MKU To buy or rent a second hand camera. .Box 374. - "'IVT'ANTET) Upholstering, packing, carpet work, repairing and mattress making work, guaranteed; prices reasonable. Trus dell. Tenth aud Jackson. AX 7" ANTED To exchange a first class driving horse, four yei.rs of age, sound and kind, for first class single harness. Inquire at Green Coal Co., 0.iU Kansas ave. AY rAN'TED Gasoline stoves cleaned for $1.00 at Hull stove repair company. 116 E. 8th. AY RANTED A few day or week boarders with room ir desired, inquire 814 Jackson St. AY fANTED Uasoline stoves to repair ac Ci. ti. Lee. Uu shop; 810 Kansas avenue. AY RANTED Some smaii real estate loans. Simon Greenspan. AY7 l7A.NTiiD Watches, clocks and umbrella! to repair at 7nt Kansas ave.. UDstairs. W 'A-NTAD To move. STOii or ship kouao- llOlfl iriljld fpui.mr ATA Sai.v & sunn fit. J23 E. 6th St. 1IERCHAATS' AKAJiSFEtt 61 SIOBAGS CO. AY ,rAiTED Ohl you never heard of tin ware o cueap. mversiae store. 7il Kansas ave. AY 'A.N ltU Vou to go to the Kiverside store uu save vuur inonov. Kansas ave. FOR RENT HOUSES. VOK KENT Elifht-rooin poita furn ishad -a. on Clay street, near sixth. Address P.O. box 400. IOK KENT Five room house. Inquire 417 Jefferson. "7"OR RENT Nice house, bath and. stable, llios. S. Lyon. 624 Kansas ave. I OK KENT A good six room house. Inquire - o( Dr. itobv. lis West ttu si. FOR SALE MISCELLANEOUS. "l-i,-K 8AI.K (iood family horse; cheap. 821 W ester u avenue. JOlt SALE Safe, cheap. 218 East Fifth. "OK SALE Cheap, or trade for a team of horses, a 4-room house and two lots on Sim Ash street. "I-TOR SALE Horses; several eleven to thir teeu hundred jiouuds. general work horses; some nine to eleven hundred pound driving and all purpose horses; one or two riding ponies, aud some good useful mares very cheap. K. J. small at American bank. .North Topeka. "IOR SALE At the Topeka Vinegar Works. -a- good berry crates, cheap. JOtt saleNo. 8 washboller. worth SI .50. how jc Kiverside store. 7 Kansas ave. "lOR SALE Short time loans as u percent interest. Simon 'irewpsyaq. "OR REAL estate or rental property see -Abeoedict a. Co.. cot Kansas ave. JOlt SALE- Gilt edge first mortgages. 7. a, i. o per cent Simou Greenspan. FOR "j'OR RENT Two downstairs rooms, good -a- pair, cheap, unfurnished; 714 Jackson. T70R KENT Rooms furnished or unfurnish--a- ed. 118 est Sixth st. 15Ei' r wo Hoors. 30xi4 and 3Sxsa half . om Ki4nsas avenue, suitable for bian bmldulgf pUrP X" Col- ITAND FO U N D. T OST A pair of gold glasses, bow over the aTdrtkiv t OST At cemetery Sundar. cane marked Vosemite. Advice 212 Fiiuuore st. T-T'Vft-" Trx place to have plumbing done; A. -a- Allen, sos Kausas ave. lei. ass. FOR lOsliKKH,X i?. SALE Desirable houses in M.jt o, 1 wu z, i jLan. ave. SALE REAL ESTATE TTSALETwo-yearTd'jerse Thomas and Chester, Oakland. 1OR SALE Cnoice suburbia tracts of S acre? ;, "r 10I;f- adjoining the city on the west, at FT , S1" lrola ia 7 Per acre. One tro-u. W. iL Forbes. bole Aent MISCELLANEOUS. T WILL sell the Amos Carpet Cleaning Form--a- ula for one-half that Eschelnian asks for it. J. S. Fosdick, 8o7 Chandler st. AT the earnest solicitation of manv voters in the Thirty-seventh representative district J. B. McAfee will be a candidate for nomination for representative train that district. "PRESCRIPTIONS tilled promptly and care fully at Walker's. Ill East Fifth st. rrHK best 5c smoke vou ever smoked at Walk--8- er'St 111 Jbs& Fifth street. OTICK To whom It may concern Be It known that my petition is on file in the pro bate court asking for a permit to sell intoxicat ug liquors at o. a32 Kansas avenue. In the Second ward of the city of Topeka. Hearing for same is set for July 21. 1894. at 9 a. m. - Fred Hollib. Topeka, Kan., June 18, ls&L ICE Cream soda with sherberts at Walker's, 111 East Fifth street. NOTICE Parties wishing a first class article of fresh mUk or sweet cream can secure the same by addressing it postal card to John G. Otis, box .164. Topeka. Kan. rpc J EXCHANGE A horse for a road wagon or buggy. E. J. Small, North Topeka. TOR RENT A grocery store and meat mar--a- ket. a No. 1 location, southwest corner of loth and Monroe St. IRUIT Sherberts with soda water at Walk er s. 111 East Fifth street. 1IA1LNESS AND REPAIR WORK. Harness aa and shoe shop; pateut leather polish for buggy tops; repairs In ail kinds of leather gooils; shoes half soied forty cents. E. F Ueu erson. lls'i West Sixth street. SODA W ATER, all flavors, at Walker's, ill East Fifth street. IJOR SERVICE A registered Holstein bull from Cheney herd at the Fair Grounds, be teen the east aud west gates. " T B. WAK1), A. M.. M. !.. ' 717 Kaxsas Avknuk. Hours: 2 to 5 p. m. Private hospital for women aaa Greenwood avenue. rili K best imported and domestic 6c and 10c -- cigars in the city at Walker's, 111 East Fifth st. PRACTICAL PIANO TUNER Years of fac tory experience. S. Tracy. 701 Kansas ave. WILLIAM LUVIGHT CHURCH Analytical and -Metallurgical Chemist and Assayar. Examination of mineral deposits and mines. Offices: Denver. Colo., Frescoct. Ariza. M RS. E. K. LILLY, nurse. can Oe lound at lla West Sixth street. SURGEONS. R. D. B. Colcord, Kidney and Private dis 725 Kansas avenue. eases. I R. G. A. TILL. Offiee 900 East Fourth Street. HEN RY W. ROB Y.M.D. (JTl If Lift V XorsKA. Kansas. ( k5 U llVX Xl.U . E. SHELDON. M. D.. SUKIJKltV AND DUITASIC-J Or WflMIf. Offlce: No. 72ii Kansas Ave. J. C. McOlintock. A. M.. M. D. Frances Storrs. A. B., M. D. MtCLIMOlK &. STOKRH, Practice limited to SURGERY aud DISEASES OF WOMEN, mi Kansas avenue, otiiee hours. 8 to 4 p. in. TAR. MARY E. STEWART. Ca4 Harrison St., corner of 7th St OBSTETRICS AND DISEASES OF WOMEN. Hours: 10 to 12 a. m.. 2 to 4 p. m. Tele. 237. DA C BARNES, M. D. OfHce and residence, 732 Kansas Avenue. Office Hours 9 a, in. to 11 a. m .and 3 p. m. to 6 p. in. Phone 99. MAGGIE L. MCCREA, M. D., ItL. 50. . 7X4 Ki.NSAi AVENTJB. OFFICE HOUHS: 8 to 10 a. in.. 12:30 to s p.m.. 6:30 to 7:30 p.m. 13 tt. EVA HARDING. Kansas Avkxoe. Tele. 402. "PR. J. K. MULVANE A-' Special attention given to chronic diseases. Omce open all hours. 600 Kai. Are. Phone 83. L. A. RYDER, M. D. , OFFICE and residence cor. Gordon street and Central ave.. North Topeka. Phone 214. Uses the Brinkerholt system of Rectal treat ment, a successful and painless treatment for piles, fistula, flsbure, ulceration, etc. MONEY TO LOAN. MONEY LOANED on horses, pianos, house hold goods, and ail kinds of chattel securi ties. L. Biscoe, fi Kansas avenue, room 3. I DESIRE 50 loans this month on Improved farms in Shawnee and surrounding counties. Privilege of paying $100 or more. Loans made in any amount, from 100 to $100,000. I. L. Bet zer. 619 Kansas avenue, Dudley's bank. 1Y1 U.Ntk' to loan uu bonds, nioraes or per sonal notes. SrMOX GRIE5SPAS. G OOD notes and mortgages bought and sold. Simon Greknspax. 1 ARTIE4 wishing a saf9 and paying Invest uieut for their money, call at 01104 ou M. Wood 6i Co. CM Kansas av. DENTISTRY. GEO. P. ASHTON. D.D. S.. T 1." 'I- T i . iiiiai. Topeka. Kansas. FIRE ALARM NUMBERS' c 4 Morse and Jackson sts. (V Kansas ave. and Railroad St. Gordon and Taylor sts. 7 Laurent and Harrison sts. Grant st. and Topeka ave. 9 "A" st. and Topeka ave. 12 .Kansas ave. and Fourth st. 18 Kansas ave and Second st. 14 No. 1 Station, Kansas ave. near Gordon. 15 Monroe and Klous sts. 16 Kansas ave. aud Garfield St. 17 Kansas and Tenth aves. 18 Kansas ave. and Thirteenth at. 19 Kansas and Euclid aves. 11 Crane and Adams sts. Ti No. 2 Station, 7th st. near Kansas ay. S Lake st. and East Sixth ave. 24 Fourth and Branner sts. i Seventh and Hollidav sts. Eighth ave. and Madison st. 87 Tenth ave. and Sac and Fox state road. 88 Seventeenth and Jefferson sts. 2 Third and Monroe sts. 81 Sixth and Topeka aves. 82 Sixth ave. and Clay St. 83 No. s Station, Jefferson st. near Fourth. 4 Western ave. and Ninth St. 85 Tenth and Topeka aves. 86 Fourth and Tavior sts. 87 No. 4 Station. Clay st. near Eighth ave. 88 Twelfth and Taylor sts. 43 Euclid ave. and Buchanan St. 48 Thirteenth and Lane sts. 45 Eleventh st. and Morris are. 48 Seventh and Lane sts. 47 Topeka ave. and Third st. 83 Eleventh and Monroe sts. 63 Tenth ave. and Lawrence St. 121 Klein and Seward aves. 128 No. 408 East Sixth ave. 124 Euclid and College ave. 41 Van Buren and Twelfth its. 81 Quiney and crane sts. 84 Fourth and LaFayette sts. Boxes north of river. Fire alarms are sounded upon the tewer bell at department headquarters by striking the Dumber 01 tne signal station nearest tne nre, m this manner: If for box 4, four distinct strokes and repeated: if for box is, one stroke, e Short Sause, then three strokes, and repeated, thus. Ill, I-III, etc "22" is sounded for all fires within the district bounded by Fifth. Kin to. Jackson and Quiney streets. ii iTnoxii, ana repeated. louowea wj tarn umoer of the signal station nearest the fire, is the bkcokd auks for a serious fire. Thrki strokes, followed by iwhti, en repeated, is the gekiral alarm for a very dangerous fire, and calls out the entire depart snent with a detail of police. x wo vtrok it, siowiy, inaicaies mu is ovr. One long whistle from water-works, for fire south of river. Three whistles from same, toi fixes north of river. TSS SAXTA FE ROUTE. TBAIXS TO KIDS OST. Xjs effect titer 194. WESTBOUND. Leave Kansas City. Arrive Topeka. Leave Topeka. Trains. Wleh.. Kingman & Pratt local.. Oklahoma & 113 8:15 am 48 am 10:85 am 10:40 am Texas Vocal 1184 10:85 am ll:ao am 8:85 pm 8:45 pm 8:40 pm 11:35 pm 40 am 50 am 40 pm 65 pm Den. j Tex. Ltm 9:80 am 1:40 pm 1:46 pm 4:80 pm California Lhn.. 6.F.& ElPasoEx 8 1 Kansas City & lopeka plug.. Colorado Night Express.. Man. & B. Acc. 108j .7 :20 pm :45 pm SO am Ex. Sunday. .. 153 Between Kansas City and Topeka only. EASTBOUND. Leave Topeka. Arrive Kansas City. Trains. K. C. Local Columbian Lim. Chicago Vesti bule Llm Atlantic Express Missouri River Night Ex Topeka and Kausas City plug Man. Si B. Acc. Ex. Sunday 2:00 pm 4:25 pm 2:40 pinj 6:00 pm 5:05 pm 7:10 pm 5:15 am 7:35 am 4:85 am 7:00 am 7:80 am 8:40 am Between Kansas City and Topeka ouiy. ATCHISON AND ST. JOSEPH. !z! Arrive 9 .Topeka. 114 1:50 pm 4 2;20 pm 6 5:0Cpm 2 5:10 am 8 4:25 am 110 154 8:00 pm t. . j 1 Leave Leave Arrive 1 rains. jno. gt Joe Atchis'n Topeka. Pacific, Mexico ; & Texas Ex press 105 8:80 am 9:20 am 11:20 am Colorado Night Express....... 107 8:40 pm 9:80 pmll:23 pm Leave Arrive . Arrive Topeka. Atchis'n St. Joe. St. Joe Morning Express 108 5:15 am 7:15 am 8:05 am Bt. Joe Evening Express 106 5:05 pm 7:00 pm 7:50 pm Buy railroad, Pullman or steamship tickets of AUVVLM BltOS., Agents Santa Fe route, southeast corner Sixth and Kansas avenue. Topeka. Or W. C. Garvey, Agent at Depot, Or abxold Si Son, Agents. North Topeka. BOCX ISLAK3 BOUTS. In effect on and after April 89, 1884. WE8TBOUSD. Leave Trains. No. Kansas Arrive Leave City. Topeka. Topeka. Solid Vestibule Express A 11 11:20 am 1:25 pm 1:85 pm Through Fast Express B 8 9:20 pm 11:80 pm 11:40 pm Chicago, Texas Express A 1 10:35 am 18:40 pm 12:55 pm Southwestern LvS.J. Express A 13 9:83 am 18:40 pm ......... Southwest Night LvS.J. Express B 3 8:00 nm U :80Tm 11 :W0 Tm EASTBOUND. Arrive Trains. No. Arrive Leave Kansas Topeka. Topeka. City. Limited Ex- press A 12 8:25 pm 8:80 pm 0:85 pm B o 1 1 d Limited Vestibule Ex press A 1 8:45pm 8:50 pm E:66pm Bt. Joseph and Eastern Ex- Ar S. J. press A 14 8:89 pm 7:80pm Express and Mail via St. Ar S. J. Joseph C 4 5:85am 6:80 am 9:30am S x p r e s s and Mall via Ki- sas City c le 8:45am 6:00 am 8:00am A Daily. B Dally, except Saturday. C Daily, except Monday. For tickets, sleeping-car berths and general Information, call at City Ticket office, 601 Kan sas avenue, corner Sixth street, telephone 430): at Passenger Station, corner First street ana Kansas avenue, (telephone 884); or at Postofiioe, North Topeka, (telephone 364). H. O. GARVEY. City Passenger Agent, UNIOS FACIFIO, Eastern Vestibule No. 8, leaves 2:47 p. m. K. C. Accom. No. 6, leaves 7:18 a. m. Western Vestibule No. 7. leaves 12:58 p. m Salina Accom. No. 5, leaves 8 50 p. m. Daily except Sunday. All others daily. Train No. 8, solid vestibule to Chicago, dining ear, free chair ears, eta., running over the Chi cago 81 Alton from Kansas City, has through sleeper for St Louis via Missouri Pacific. Train Wo. 7, solid vestibule for Denver, making direct connection for Faclflo coast Througit Pullman cars for Salt Lake; through colonist car to Portland, etc.. eta. City ticket offiee. 525 Kansas ave. MISSOURI PACIFIC. Train. Ko Lv's Topeka Topeka and Fort Scott ao-l eommoaanon , 886 lO:eo a. m. A Vs Topeka Topeka and Fort Soot ao eonxmodatlon . , S9Si 8:80 p. m. I. T. 5c S. W. RT. EAST. Lear. Topeka. .. T;80 a.m Arrive Leavenworth., 11 :00 a.m WEST. Leave Leavenworth, via Oskaloosa.. 5:00 p.m Arrive Topeka 8:80 p.m Accommodation, dally ex. Sunday. Wornarj You have your troubles, but w have the remedy. We know thi because ladies who use tell us so. If you are not fully convinced of Its merits, ask some of your friends about it. Some of them, probably, have used It. We are willing to stand or fall ob the testimony of ladies who have used Viavi. You should profit by their experience; Doit Rusb blindly into it. Infom yourself fully. "Be sure you are right, then go ahead.' Kansas Viavi Co., t Ceissikiaa BaH'ief. TOPEKA, KANSAS. Home Office and Laboratory, Ssa Francuce, C&l. rrKTryjnTr.-jjMTjnrJwiwt.pfTi ..J .jh J wmum Hi... 10.75 te Deiver m.md. Ketaro bv the tiaiitn Fe Boats. Ticket sold June 23 and 24. cood to return Juie 30, July iq or July 27, and gooa to stop on at Colorado Bpriairs and Pueblo. Read the "Wants." Manv nf tt,.-. as iatereaUnor aa news itema, See if it ia not so. KILAUEA'S MIGHTY THROES. Tbver lM sant Ernption of tKe HSTrsllaa Vol cjaoo Is a. Corker. News from Hil-a shows thav the great crater is in a state of violent ebullition. From all accounts the action seems to be more forious tban for 13 to 20 years. The scene, from accounts of tourists who have just returned, must be wonderfully impressive. At night the raging fires suggest the most lurid pictures of the in fernal regions. No conception can be -formed from the most vivid word pic tures of the wonderful reality. One must see to understand and appreciate, and there can be no real comprehension of anything so vast and so tremendous even from seeing. ' The last eruption, when the lavas were drained away, was in March, 1891; but, although very active up to the time the lavas were drained away, all statements show that nothing approaching the pres ent activity was visible at that time. When the break during 1891 occurred, a large section of the floor of the great caldera was plunged into the depths, leaving a hole 600 or 700 feet deep and perhaps a half mile across. The fires disappeared, and all was silent. The fiery goddess appeared to be sleeping. Some predicted that she had departed for all time. But in a few months at the bottom of the hideous abyss restless movements began. Far oif rumblings and quivering of the sullen walls, with further down plunges of the debris piles, made it known that Pele was still there and that she would soon resume her imperial sway. Then a red eye glared, up from the depths. Then silent ly a mouth opened, and a sudden gush of boiling lava surged into the upper world, only to fall back into the unseen depths, where muttering thunders threatened a coming storm. It came. With a start Pele awoke and hurled her defiance out into the world again. From a little pool at the bottom ot the pit the burning lava filled up aud spread widely over the pit, till in a year there was a little lake of fire. Then it pushed up higher, and in two years, in the summer of 1893, tha pit had become a depression 150 feet deep, in the middle of which was a magnificent lake of boil ing and spouting lava. It was perhaps 1,200 feet across and nearly round and represented an immense cone cut off 30 feet above the base. The enormous pressure of the liquid mass within con stantly opened the walls, while con tinual overflows built them up. Occa sionally a section would burst open, and a broad and splendid stream of burning lava poured into the surrounding pit. Sometimes a dozen, often 20, fine foun tains played over the surface, toss ing columns of fire many feet into the air, and then the wind caught the glassy liquid, and, spinning it into beautiful filaments, long tresses of Pele's hair floated away. At night the scene was one of rare beauty, if anything so imposing and aw ful can be beautiful. The clouds of steam, smoke and occasional fogs from the cold mountains which rolled into the crater would be lighted with vivid bril liancy. At times, when very clear, snow capped Mauna Loa, 80 miles away, or the soft banks of fleecy clouds over its summit, blushed a rosy red. From far at sea and on distant parts of the is land the light of Kilauea glowed a steady beacon in the clouds. In the past six months the mighty forces at her com mand have been summoned by the god dess of Hawaiian volcanoes. She has filled the pit till it has overflowed. There is no longer a pit. It has grown into a towering hill of fire. Lava ia spouted far above the banks. Constant over flows render the vicinity one of hazard ous excitement, if not of danger. Pacific Commercial Advertiser. The Oldest Iron Warship. The Warrior, the oldest armor clad chip in the world, built entirely of iron, is about to be renovated and prepared for service abroad as a guardehip at one of the coaling stations. She was launch ed by the Thames Iron Works company at Blackwall Dec. 29, 1860, and commis sioned for the first time in August, 1864, by Captain A. A. Cochrane for service in the channel. She is to have new boil ers, certainly, and a new secondary bat tery of ojiick firing guna. London World. He Will Stand the Loss. Uncle Sam Beems to be very accurate in his bookkeeping. Postmaster Greene has just been informed by the sixth auditor of the postofiico department, who is known also as the auditor of the treasury for the postofflce accounts, that he overpaid two carriers a cent each for services. That is quite a large sum to lose at once, but Postmaster Greene will not make a formal demand for the amount due Uncle Sam. He will stand the loss. Worcester Gazette. Beared by st Joke. A certain lady of worldwide celebrity is in the habit of having baccarat parties at her house in London. A short time ago three or four intimate men friends of hers dressed themselves as police offi cers, and having knocked at the door boldly walked up to the room where they knew gambling was going on. Their en trance was the signal for a general stam pede, and great was the relief to all when the raid was found to be a joke. New York Times. The K. ot P. Eneftmpm.nt. President Cleveland has promised to review the Knights of Pythias at their triennial encampment at Washington in August, and General Schofield has con sented to inspect them. This is the first time the president and the commanding general of the army have so honored sim ilar organizations. The encampment will begin Aug. 27 and last three days. Washington Dispatch. SOME JOCULAR JINGLES- . A Great Schol-J Ho was primed In ancient Coptfo , and the earliest Egyptian. auA old Niiwvlt . -inscriptions were to him but '"") but ABC. He knew Basque and, old Ktmaoan, and was voluble in Sanakriv and could raad the ' Zend A veal with -... - great perspt. cacity. ' And be knew the old. Turanian, and the Javanese and Hebrew, and the W'am - panoag dialect, fiindooetanee and the rest, And the great old ancient lanrnage spoke before the tower of BabeL, and all. dialects and idioms spoke between the east and weet Bat be tried the fashion column in his wife's domestic paper, and no slightest trace of meaning did It anywhere betray. When be tried to decipher a complex crochet de scription, it brought on a brain congestion. Skj-id his grave was dug next , day. New Tork World. Too Sfnch Beslltm. O writers realistic. Wont yon. just to please m friend. Be not so pessimistic In the way your stories end? And can't you now and then contrive To let the lovers wed, Nor have the heroine arrive To find the hero dead? The fair appearing things of life Are not forever bad. And even in this vale of strife Are moments that axe glad. Oh, can't you to your world of doubt Admit a little flash Of sunlight now and then without Its going all to sxuash? Quit blasting every happy bud; Quit clouding every hour; . Quit plastering our gods with mud; Quit making sweet things sour. We're tired of repiners who Imbitter every cup. Ring off. ye bilious whinersl Do, For pity's sake, let up! Chicago Journal. At Last. She let her band be taken, and with confidence unshaken be tried his best to waken in her heart some sentiment. With a wondrous burst or feeling round her waist his arm was stealing, yet her face showed no revealing of her mind's ingenuous bent. His voice, quite low and pleading, for himself was interceding, but the maiden paid no heeding to the words that he might say. And no lover persevering ever had so dumb a hearing to his terms of love endearing as she gave to him that day. Until his chance he waited with a guile pre meditated, and with cheek unmitigated up and kissed her. Then she cried: "There, you monster! I Just knew HI I was sure, or quite near to it, if I waited you would do it. Now I hope you're satisfied." Tom Masaon la Life. . Fose. "Yes," she whiepered. With a quick, startled glance behind her she glided across the floor. "Yes," the woman repeated, "I must cre ate a scene." With a few deft movements she arranged some trees and a waterfall about her, as sumed a sweet and pensive smile and called to the photographer that ehe was all ready and would like to have him get a move on him. Detroit Tribune. Both Mistaken. "Did you speak to me, sir?" said the pas senger on the seat in front, turning stiffly to stare at the passenger who had leaned forward to remark that it looked like rain. No,tir," replied the other pleasantly. "I spoke to a gentleman I thought you resem bled. I see I was mistaken." Chicago Tribune. 1 ; A Dangerous Exploit. M. Fermain (one of the seconds) My principal, the count, refuses to consent to a duel in the woods at dawn. M. le Comte Why not? M. Fermain Morbleul Think of the risks! Both of the gentlemen might catch cold I Chicago Record. Sally McMulligan (on the left) Poor lit tle girls! Dey fancy dey are havink fun play ink at dolls, but dey orter play wit real live babies if dey wants ter git de secret of en joy ink dis life. You kin bet I know wot real fun isl Truth. , t No Chances. Featherstone (nervously) Whose over coat is that in the hall, Willie, your father's or your brother's? Willie It isn't my brother's. Sister told him you were coming;, and he said be wouldn't trust it there. Clothier and Fur nisher. A Crank's Fate. Friend That old crank Whitehair, who always refused to have a doctor, died last night. Dr. Dosem I knew it. I knew it would happen. I prophesied 40 years ago that be would die some time. New York Weekly. " i Pleasant. Madge This weather, Mr. Pu fib rain, how does it suit you? Mr. Puffbrain Drives) me out of my mind. Madge How you must enjoy itl Chica go Inter Ocean. An Objection. Willy I hate these four ring circuses. Mamma Why, Willy? Willy Because they use up the circus too soon. If they had only one ring, the circus would be four times as long. puck. An Old Friend. She This is the first time this year you have worn your summer suit, isn't it? He Yea. How do you like it? She Oh, I always did like it, Clothier and Furnisher. - ' Real jajoyxuemt, . TAKINQ CARE OF HER FORESTS. France Farther Advanced In the Selene Tban Any Other Nation There is no country in Europe where the science of forestry receives so much attention from the govern ment as in France, and a tribute to the pre-eminence of that nation in this particular branch of culture was afforded by the Anglo-Indian govern ment, which for many years main tained a branch of its crown college of forestry at Nancy. It may there fore be of interest to state that tha ministry, after having had under con sideration various schemes of preven tion of the fires which annually de stroy hundreds of thousands of trees, has now decided to inaugurate a series of isolation tones. These spaces are to be traced out so as to go through the moistest ground, and at every pond there will bo a tower res ervoir with fire engines and long hose. As an illustra tion of the attention which the government pays to these matters the once bare heath or -"landes" of Gascony, covering an area of 1,500.000 acres, is now covered by a dense for est of pine and cork trees planted by the state. Another measure in this direction announced by the govern ment is the proclamation that a pre mium of 10 centimes will be paid to each person who brings - a kilogram of cock-chafers, which, do so much damage to the trees. Notices to this effect have been printed and posted in every commune and village throughout tha country. The humor of the announce ment lies in the fact that the average number of cockchafers to a kilogram is 1,163, which enables one to appre ciate to the fullest extent the munifi cence of the government and the valus of cockchafer hunting, at the rate of 1 cent for every 600 insects, as a means of livelihood. THE PILLOW NUISANCER A Fad Requiring the Sleeper's Head to Lower Than Ills Baals. "I happened to be in Kansas City while the convention was on," said F. S. Niles, "and owing to the crowded condition of tho hotels was compelled to double up with a stranger. He was a very pleasant man of German descent and did nothing erratio until he went to bed. Then he removed the casters from the legs at the head of the bed, so as to make it lower than the foot, placed his pillows at the foot of the bed, and went to sleep with his head at inches lower than slept the sleep of least twelve his feet. He the just and had to be called half a dozen times in the morning We went down to breakfast together, and I ridiculed him for his peculiar sleeping posture. He quoted some German scientist with five-syllable name as his authority, and so convinced me of the fact that it is entirely a mistake to suppose that pillows and bolsters arji necessary that that night I discarded both and found to my surprise that he was right. The discovery wtas a revela tion to me, but it is certain that to wme people, at least, a pillow ia a nuisance instead of a comfort, if they only knew the fact." No Foreigners Need Apply. A new law of New York state re quires that employment on publio work, done by contract, shall be given . to citizens only. It is a law that will be adopted by other states in time. The citizens of Switzerland are said to be more fully employed than those of other countries because the system of employing citizens only is rigidly observed by the government. For ex ample, recently a railroad, which had been operated by a French company, passed into the control of the Swiss government, and it at once served no tice on some hundreds of French em ployes that their places would be filled by Swiss. Drinking- Blood. The Zoothermic institute in Home Is a "cure" place where people go to drink fresh blood for the cure of gout, rheumatism and the great prostration and anaemia caused by the malarial fever of the Tontine marshes. The blood to be imbibed is .first rapidly freed from fibrin, by a carefully aseptic , method, the animals from which it is derived having previously undergone inspection by a veterinary surgeon. Some patients bathe either a part or whole of the body In the warm blood, and, the Italian doctors think, with great benefit.' The Man With m WTlg. A suspicious looking stranger while witnessing an operatic performance In Bordeaux, was quietly approached by two detectives aud requested to accompany them to the police station. He was supposed, to be an anarchist. He had on a wig and false whiskers. He proved to be an innocent clergy man, who ia fond of- opera, and had thus disguised himself to escape rec ognition by his friends. A Potato Pointer. An English scientist, after careful experiments, finds that when potatoes are cooked without removing the skins they lose only 3 per cent of nu tritive quality through extraction of the juice. When the skins were re moved before boiling,, the loss was 14 per cent, which makes the process of cooking the potatoes without their jackets an exceedingly wasteful one. A Destructive Ship Worm. The Fast Indian ship worm will in a few months destroy any vessel by eating out the interior of the beams and planks. They will be left a mere shell that can be shattered by the fist. How Loa Angeles Does It. The sewage of Los Angeles, Cal.. is conveyed sixteen miles out into the Pacific ocean and there finds an exit thirty feet below the surface of tk water. -