The Topeka state journal. [volume], January 13, 1906, LAST EDITION, Page 6, Image 6

About The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980

Image provided by: Kansas State Historical Society; Topeka, KS

                
TII23 TOPE II A DAILY STATE
JOUE1TAL. SATURDAY NIGH T.
o-T i rrn
'"'"nil.
! i p. a Mi r. macu:x.ax.
e I for Every Day in Hie Year.
-"J Ju!v 1, as second class
t the postoff ice at Topeka, Kan.,
i;;e act ot congress. J
VO
' I- XXXIII.
.No. 13
Official Paper City of TopcUa.
CSetel Faj-wr Kansas State Federation
Women s CIuo-.
TERMS OF SUBSCRIPTION.
Week Day Edition and Edition for Sun
day Morning.
10 Cents Per Week Everywhere.
City, Town or Country.
RV M 4TT.'
pally, inch:1tn Sunday, 1 year 15 50
3 'a My. including Sunriav. fi months '-
I'a'ly, including Sunday. 3 months 133
J-:, without Sunday. 1 vear 4-00
l-aHy, without Sunday. 6 months U.00
I'aiiy, without Sunday. 3 montln 1-W
frunday edition, colored comics, year.. 2.00
TELEPHONES.
Business Office Bell. lf7
-uHsnps Office Ind. 107
importers' Room Hell 577
ii'-porters' Room Ind. 55
i rank P. MaeLer.nan Ind. 700
Ft T,L LEASED WIRE REPORT OP
THE ASSOriATF.I) PRESS EVERY
WEEK DAY AND PUBLISHERS
PRESS REPORT OX SATURDAY
NIGHT FOR THE EDITION FOK
S V S DAY MORXIXG.
i he State Journal ia a member of the
Associated Press and receives the full dny
I;ffraph report of that great news or
on for exclusive evening publi
cation. The State Journal receives for exclusive
runhcatton the leased wire report of the
J-u rubbers' Press for the edition for Bun-
mr,fnp.
The nws Is received In the State Jour
ral building over wires for this sole pur
rose. Kansas City has at last got 25-cent
gas in sight.
Mr. Rogers undoubtedly believes
that silence is golden especially in his
ease.
An exchange speaks of "the trouble
at Panama." But the trouble isn't at
Panama; it's in the United States
senate.
Just think of the United States sen
ate intimating that there is graft in
connection with the digging of the
Panama canal!
Problem in arithmetic: If Theodore
Roosevelt should become president of
the University of Chicago, what effect
would it have on the price of oil?
France must think it is the Japan
of Europe. It is not only making
faces at Germany but here it is arous
ing Castro's ire in Venezuela at the
same time.
The announcement is made that a
substitute for tobacco has been dis
covered. This discovery is nothing
new. The cabbage growers knew all
about it years ago.
Young Mr. Rockefeller asks, "Is it
ever right to do wrong in order to ac
complish a right end?" Is young Mr.
Rockefeller asking for information or
just out of idle curiosity?
The output of ignorance which Mr.
H. H. Rogers is able to show in the
course of a day's testimony has rarely
been excelled. It takes an exceed
ingly wise man to know when to be
Ignorant.
One of these days Mr. H. H. Rogers
is very likely to discover what the old
fashioned rack was like the kind that
was used in olden times to get in
formation out of people who knew but
ouldn't te!!.
Missouri may be breaking into the
limelight more with its Standard Oil
lawsuit than Kansas is with its little
difficulty with Colorado, but it can't
show up seventeen volumes of testi
mony not yet.
Diplomatic relations between France
and Venezuela have been severed, and
the ministers of each nation have taken
their respective doll rags and gone
home. Castro seems to be bound to
keep something doing.
Commissioner Garfield says he has
"never had the slightest difficulty in
getting Information about corpora
tions." Herbert Hadiey should ad
dress Mr. Garfield, asking for hi3
recipe and enclosing stamp for reply.
The story that a congressman once
franked a cow through the mails is
groing the rounds. Perhaps this was
the same congressman who is said to
frank his laundry home eai.h week
from Washington to save laundry
bills.
Pittsburg claims to have had a ban
quet recently at which the guests rep
resented a total of J 600.000.000. And
yt they probably did not have a quar
ter of the appetites of a dozen news
boys whose sole earthly possessions
represent less than six bits.
Jibe from the Chicago Tribune:
"There is talk of widening the Kaw
river. To the casual observer this
seems needless. There are times when
the Kaw widens itself to an extent that
ought to gratify the wildest ambi-
ion.
A Chicago paper says somebody in
authority in Washington has been try
ing to give away the Isle of Pines, and
it demands that his identity be made
public. By all means let us know who
he is. If anybody is around trying to
jtive away islands, or even offering
them for sale at bargain rates, the
public ought to know it. Why doesn't
he advertise?
It is related that recently in an east
ern town a. man died who was some
thing of a singer. He had been a
phonograph . fiend, and among his
"records" were several of his favorite
hymns sung by himself. During the
funeral services the phonograph was
placed on the coffin and the hymns
were ground out as sung by the de
ceased. Again science scores, by com
rrl'ing a man to sing at his own
funeral.
Sometimes people wonder why there
tre so many desertions from tbt army.
I
Perhaps that long march which the
men of the Sixth tottery were com
pelled to make from Fort Riley to
Fort Sam Houston may throw some
light on the question. The dispatches
say that the battery has just reached
its destination, having marched eleven
hundred miles in fifty-five days. The
men are haggard and the horses mere
skeletons. Some of the privates are
scarcely able to travel because of the
hardships they have undergone. They
have suffered greatly on the march.
One man died from exposure and
hardships. Apd all to no purpose
whatever. The efficiency of the army
has been in no wise increased, and
nothing has been learned except that
some high officers have made a bad
blunder. Men can make such marches
when called to do so by the fortunes of
war, but it is almost criminal to force
them to undergo such hardships in
time of peace. Private soldiers are
subject to indignities by officers in the
name of "discipline" that are extreme
ly difficult for a self-respecting Ameri
can citizen to stand and retain his self
respect. If these conditions were
somewhat different perhaps desertions
from the army would not be so fre
quent. HARRIMAN AND ROGERS.
In connection with the recent in
vestigations of the conduct of corpora
tions, it is decidedly refreshing to com
pare the answer of Mr. Harriman in
the Insurance investigations with those
of Mr. Rogers in the Standard Oil
case now in progress in New York city,
conducted by that Kansas man, now
attorney general of Missouri, Herbert
Hadiey.
Mr. Hadiey Is pursuing Mr. Rogers
so closely that he may possibly pos
sibly, remember get a direct answer
to some of his important questions.
Mr. Harriman is an Interesting char
acter to the west because he is spend
ing enormous sums of money in west
ern railroads. The construction of the
Lucin cut off through Great Salt Lake
is one of the marvels of railroad en
gineering and was one of Mr. Harri-
man's projects. Nearer home, the
double track line now almost com
pleted on the Union Pacific between
Topeka and Kansas City, and to be
used jointly with the Rock Island, is a
project in which Topeka and Kansas
are especially interested. It is said
that this sixty-seven miles of work will
be one of the finest stretches of double
rack In the whole country. Mr. Har
riman seems to believe in spending
money on improving his lines rather
than on lobbyists, and he aided in ex
posing rotten methods of the insur
ance companies in the recent investiga
tions. Mr. Harriman appears to have come
out with a healthier bill than many of
his associates. His printed testimony
is at hand. He said he wanted to see
that matters were "on the square."
His answers were full and frank, not
evasive and refractory. There is none
of the impudence in his testimony that
constantly signalizes the Rogers an
swers now coming out day by day. One
of Mr. Harrlman's answers was: "If
It will help your committee in any way
I will be glad to do so."
Harriman was a member of the
Frick committee, and concurred in its
report. notwithstanding it reflected
seriously upon his young friend, Mr.
Hyde. Harriman advised Hyde to face
the music and he moved the adoption
of the Frick report which was severe
upon Hyde. The Frick committee
report pried Mr. Hyde loose from a
hundred thousand dollar job, and was
the herald of the downfall of the presi
dents of the two other big companies
involved in the insurance scandal.-
IX DEFENSE OF THE CAPITAL.
If anybody Is suggested as a candi
date for office In opposition to some one
the Topeka Capital wants that paper
promptly raises the cry that he is a
railroad candidate. Less than three
years ago the Capital was busy boost
ing railroad candidates, and its columns
teemed with railroad editorials. It is a
little too new a convert to warrant it
In assuming to be the entire anti-railroad
show. Kingman Leader-Courier.
Isn't the Leader-Courier a little bit in
clined to find fault with this earning
criticism? The State Journal sometimes
had its differences with its contemporary
across the alley, but it will not remain
silent under any uncalled-for criticisms
of its morning rival.
In the first place, the Capital is en
tirely consistent in its attitude. This is
the Eeason of the year when no election
is at hand and this is therefore a good
time for the Capital to put up a vigor
ous fight against the railroads and vari
ous other things. Later on, when it
comes time to vote, it can come into
line for the railroad candidates all right.
The Capital is used to that sort of
thing. A dozen years ago the Capital's
editor was writing free silver planks
for the Republican state platform in
Kansas, but when the powers that be
decreed that free silver was wicked, the
Capital was immediately converted and
was against free silve r at once and
forthwith; and although its faith in a
high tariff for the trusts is wobbling a
little of late, it is still against free sil
ver. Of course that is ancient history, but
coming down to a recent date it has a
record as a lightning change artist that
is entirely consistent with its course re
garding railroads. Less than 15 months
ago it was explaining that Tom Kelly's
furnishing A. A. Godard with $123,000 of
state money with which to finance the
notorious Comanche county bond deal,
and actually paying Godard interest on
the state's own money during the time
he was using it the Capital was ex
plaining that this was only "technical
embezzlement" on Kelly's part and that
he ought therefore to be re-elected as
state trasurer. Recently it has urged that
a "technical" violation of law on the
part of the cattlemen in fencing public
lands Is just as bad as any violation
and should be severely punished.
During the last campaign, too, the
Capital was kept busy explaining to the
voters how pure-minded and upright
were the perpetrators of that Comanche
bond outrage, but recently it boldly sta
ted that even Attorney General Coleman
"was nominated by a railroad eombi
tion." Then there is the Capital's well known
endorsement of the present railroad
board during the last campaign. It
even joined in aiding A. D. Walker to
get his fraudulent delegation from
Jackson county into , the Republican
state convention. Of course the Capital
knew then that Mr. Walker was a rail
road candidate at least it might have
discovered it by reading the State Jour
nalbut at that time the "exigencies of
politics" demanded that it stand for the
railroad candidates and it stood.
There is therefore nothing inconsistent
in the way the Capital is fighting the
railroads now, and the Kingman pa
per's criticism is entirely uncalled for.
If the Capital can aid in steering the
new railroad reform movement in Kan
sas in favor of its friends it will doubt
less consider its course abundantly jus
tified, and if It doesn't It can easily line
up for the raiiroads again.
So why should the Kingman paper
break forth in carping criticism of the
State Journal's contemporary? If it
wishes to "assume to be the entire anti
road show," why shouldn't it do so?
It w ill probably get a lot of amusement
out of the assumption, and hardly any
one will be fooled by it.
JOURNAL ENTRIES j
Frank Jarreil always did "have it
in for Cyrus Leland. He says the
only difference between Boss Leland
and Boss Stubbs is that Stubbs has
rea nair.
a
One of a boy's serious troubles is
naing to wear a home-made hair cut.
m
t ersonal mention: Mrs. Cassie L.
t.naawtck is a new washerwoman who
nas lately moved to Columbus, Ohio.
Of course it is eminently proper for
ine united states senate to investigate
me rumors of graft at Panama. If
there Is graft anywhere you can trust
the United States senate to find out
where the graft is. Of course. Let
tne good work go on!
Some people object to old age and
wrinkles, but they never turn down a
twenty dollar bill on that account.
j - " - -TT-T. ,,-
ij J AY II A WKER JOTS jj
Work was begun a few days ago on a
new opera house foi Coffeyville.
Harper county paid off the last of its
county Indebtedness not long ago.
The Stafford Republican is another
country weekly paper that has installed
a linotype.
According to Ralph Tennal there is
a wonderful girl in Sabetha who nas
practiced until she can make the dim
ples in her cheeks show, no difference
what words she uses.. .
The county commissioners 'ot Wilson
county have offered a bounty of five
cents for each crow killed in that coun
ty between now and the first of July.
The man bthind the gun wll now- get
busy.
Mild remonstrance by the Coffeyville
Record: The newspapers of the state
have been making puns out of Rev.
Otto's Methodist revival, for nearly two
weeks and The Record has submitted
to it without a word, but it is getting
ancient now and we believe the ques
tion Otto be dropped.
There was a strike at Coffeyville the
other night. The white "turn-out-and-carry-in"
boys in a fruit jar factory,
seventeen in number in the night shift,
refused to work with four colored boys.
The plant was tied up during one night,
but the next day the strikers won and
the work continued.
Warning to Frank Jarreil by Father
Reek: Frcnk Jarreil, the editor of the
Signal, complains that "our wife" oc
casionally drops into the office and
proceeds to "blue pencil" his editorials.
Shucks! that's nothing. Let Frank
wait until "our wife" is reinforced, by
"our son" and "our daughter" and he
will begin to realize what trouble is on
this particular line.
Atchison Globe: "Who was it? A
white-haired man Is sweeping snow off
the walks in St. Joe. charging five cents
a job. and this is what he tells: I
guess this is the first time you ever had
a United States senator shovel the snow
from vour walk. I was one of the sen-
-nm the Sunnower aiaie
,-!, in Marshall county, Kansas.
I
,i inw for twenty-one
years
there. This shows what whisky will do
Farmers' are warned by the Troy
Chief to look out for a new grafter.
Nebraska farmers have been worked by
the water tank graft. A man offers
them a water tank warranted not to
freeze up w 1th the thermometer 30 de
grees below zero. If he cannot sell a
tank the agent leaves a sample lit re
qu.res a contract that the farmer re
turns it if not satisfactory. Of course
he contract turns up in the same old
way as a note for the farmer to pay.
QUAKER REFLECTIONS-
From the Philadelphia Record.!
A threatening letter T.
Figures never lie, except in election re-
tUStrar,ge as it may seem, a course in-
" To' make a long story short-The editor
ial blue pencil.
Few women can change color without
the aid of a make-up Dox.
seen a great
painting onct called 'Work-." T.
,.n--CT pf,f,r p ' Rollingst
Tatterdon
one No-
lorn .-i m . ,
moss-"Sure it was. It maae me u.eu.
The fellow who never makes way for
others is pretty sure to make his own
No Maud; vou should not be afraid of
a fisil bite. It only results fatally to the
fi The more a woman' coddles her dog the
more she is apt to regard her husband as
a brute. .
The advice of our friends comes m han
dy when we want to blame our failures
on something.
The man who is known among his in
timates as a "good fellow" doesn't al
ways have that reputation at home.
Blobbs "What a man says in an after
dinner speech is seldom charged against
him." Slobbs "No; but the wine that
ins. ires it is."
Wigg "Do you think the political con
tractors are a good thing for the city?"
Wa' "Certainly not. But the city seems
to be a good thing for the political con
tractors." POINTED PARAGRAPHS.
From the Chicago News.
Fresh paint shows up better on fences
than on faces.
No man knows all there is to know
about his business.
It is time to look out when a thing will
not bear looking into.
A girl's idea of a coward Is a young
man who is afraid to propose.
Brevity may be the soul of wit, but
when a man is short it's no joke.
Some women spend half their time
quarreling and the other half gossiping.
A "surprise party" is one to which the
undesirable neighbors are not invited.
It isn't always the man with the high
est forehead that makes the most of h'S
brains.
A spinster says all angels arc beardless
because even the best men get into heav
en only by a close shave.
If husbands and wives loved each other
as they love themselves there would be
no need of divorce courts.
AltS AS COMMENT
B
THE CASE OF RAILEY.
Former Governor Bailey has paid the
state the money he used for his grocery
bill. The attorney general before he
used this money told Governor Bailey
that the law was plain in giving him
the right to use the money appropriated
for maintenance for his grocery bills
and the governor paid other bills in the
maintenance out of his own pocket.
These bills that he paid out of his own
pocket, should have been charged to the
state, and the court has held would have
been legally allowable. The governor
acted on the best legal advice the state
provided, and he has been made to pay
the money back on a mere technicality.
It is a disgrace to the state of Kansas
that a man whom every one knows is
thoroughly disreputable, who has evad
ed and violated laws with impunity, and
has profited thereby It is a. shame that
this man should be allowed to pursue
W. J. Bailey in this outrageous manner.
If Kansas ever had an honest governor,
1J .-I WJi-" ? H??
legally, and acted upon, and it cost him
$1,500; he had bad advice politically, and
it cost him his job as governor. But for
all that, personally W. J. Bailey is a
brave, honest man, and some day he
will come into his kingdom. The people
of Kansas are just as ashamed of the
way they treated Bailey as he is of the
advice he took, and before long he and
the people will kiss and make up, and
he will know enough to take his own ad
vice and let his scheming friends pad
dle their own canoes. That is about the
only way a man can get on, in politics
or out of it. Emporia Gazette.
TWO SUCCESSES.
Men have two kinds of ambition,
one for dollar-making;- the other for
life-making. Some turn all their
ability, education, health, and energy
toward the first of these, and call the
result success. Others turn them to
ward the second, into character, use
fulness, and the world is very apt to
call them failures; but history calls
them successes. The highest service
you can ever render the world, the
greatest thills' you can ever do, is to
make yourself the largest, completest
and the squarest man possible. There
is no other fame like this, no achieve
ment like this. Council Grove Guard.
WHY, OhTwHY?
Mr. H. H. Rogers says the claim that
he refuses to answer Hadley's questions
because he might incriminate himself is
absurd. Certainly it 1s, but why don't
he answer those questions. Salina Jour
nal. THE GUN-TOTING HABIT.
The ratio of homicides in the United
States last year was 115 to the million.
In Germany where the gun toting habit
is less well developed the proportion was
but 13 to the million. Leavenworth
Times.
NOT FOR HIS HEALTH.
Telegraph advices are to the effect
that John A. McCall will shortly leave
for Europe in the interest of his health.
This announcement is worthy of more
than passing notice, as during Mr. Mo
Call's long career as president of the
New York Life Insurance company he
was never accused of doing anything
"for his health. May he continue m
this laudable work. Coffeyville Record.
APOLOGIES.
It seems that when the dilatory law-
attempts to rlace its fish worm paw
upon a big rich man it takes off its hat
and apologizes for Its impertinence; and
when the attorney for the state, or the
government, asks the rich man a ques
tion and is invited by the rich man to
go to the government lawyers doesn't ex
actly go, but he apologizes to the rich
man for not going, ElDorado Republi
can. ,
FROM OTHER PENS
A HEALTH BULLETIN.
After the Armstrong committee has
finished its work, and Mr. Jerome has
turned his attention to other matters,
it is expected that a number of gentle
men who have gotten sick of late will
be convalescent. Birmingham News.
o
4' ' NOT MADE FOR USE.
A friendship is said to be indicated
between the emperor of Germany and
the sultan of Turkey by the courteous
warmth of their mutual New Year
greetings. But New Year greetings
and New Year resolutions belong to
the same general class. Washington
Star.
NO TIME TO KNOW THINGS.
Standard Oil officials presumably do
not know anything about their busi
ness because they are kejit so busy
counting the money as it comes in that
they have no time to look into details.
Chicago News.
o
HE DOES ALREADY.
"Now- the charge is made that Nick
Longworth plays the fiddle." The
chances are that in a few months he
will be playing second fiddle. Rich
mond News-Leader.
FAIRBANKS' BOOM.
Simply because the cut of the Pair
banks jib has occasionally been criti
cised, that justifies nobody in charac
terizing the senator's presidential
aspiration as a queer little jib-boom.
Richmond Times-DisDatch.
i?
SHOCKING.
For the next few dais New- York
will not know whether it feels a suc
cession of earthquakes or merely Gen
eral Bingham s emphatic way or put
ting on various lids. Philadelphia
Inquirer.
o
SURPRISING.
John Sharp Williams says he has not
had time to prepare a speech on the
tariff question. It is a little surprising
to find a congressman who can not
make a speech on the tariff without
preparation or provocation.- -Washington
Post.
THE "SHARP" LAWYER.
A movement is on foot in New- Jersey
to disbar "sharp" lawyers who try by
dragging in foolish technicalities to
thwart the ends of justice. This is en
couraging. The "sharp" lawyer is a
costly luxury, and it is time to abolish
him. Chicago Record-Iterald.
o- -
LET 'EM STRIKE.
Nor will it be necessary to view with
alarm the threatened strike of the
chorus girls until it Includes the mem
bers of the original Florodora sextette.
Indianapolis News.
A SLIGHT CHANGE.
Mr. Carm gie should have taught his
young men that in their cases the
phrase would be wine, women and
s'long. New- York World.
o
NEXT!
Governor Herrick. of Ohio, has taken
a parting shot at the lobbyists. The
country is now waiting to hear from
Governor Higgins, of New- A" ork. Chi
cago Record-Herald.
WHERE LAMBS ARE SHEARED
The stock-transfer tax does not pre
vent the price of seats in the Wall street
shearing-shed from going up. New
York World. I
JET A
THE INSURANCE MEN.
I shall not credit what they say
'-out those men so good and kind
V, used to come most every day
'J o cheer me and improve my mind,
Who gave me counsel wise and free
.About the brevity of life.
And bade me shield my family
From this cold world's financial strife.
Each year a calendar they sent
To show the rapid flight of time
And surplus statements, too, that meant
An optimism most sublime.
Strike downward my idols if you must'.
But few survive a lifetime's span.
But spare, oh, spare that friend so just
And true, the life insurance man!
Washington Star.
You Pay the Freight.
That loss has to be made up by some
body: it does not come out of the pock
ets of the railroad men. we mav be
Ftire of that. The railroad gets it back
in high rates on the farmer's products
for the farmers have no trust. They
get it back in rates on your hats and
shoes, your food, your coal, and other
commodities. You pay it: you are a
sort of unconscious phllan
KjstlnK Mr A us m h J
rUn Part of fVePgiTt r;
thropist as-
busmess by
""; f" 'i 'L1?" "1-..
asato the he ht" i
tnus witn tne destinies of cities, but
they go also to the depths of petty
trickery. Nothing seems too great nor
too small when a penny is to be turned.
One would suppose that when they
make millions In wholesale rate discrim
inations that they would not descend to
mean and trivial subterfuges. But ex
amine this condition of things. Beef is
hung up in the refrigerator cars. There
is a space underneath on the floor of
the car. It has been charged that this
space is sometimes crowded full of
dressed poultry, eggs, and so on. Poul
try and eggs take a high freight rate;
but thus packed. Armour gets them car
ried for nothing! It is his car: it is his
packing house; he has tremendous influ
ence with the railroads. Inspectors are,
of course, appointed to see that no con
traband freight is carried and that the
weights are correctly registered, but
there are many cars and few inspectors
as the tesimony in these cases plainly
shows. How .much of such business
goes on no one knows and no one can
find out but it has been shown to exist
in numerous cases. Of course .if Ar
mour can carry his poultry and eggs
from Chicago to New York free, that
is if he can save the freight charge or
even a part of it, he can undersell his
competitors and ultimately put them out
of business. Indeed, a very large part
of the poultry and egg business of the
country is now- in his hands and more
is drifting that way every year. From
"Railroads on Trial," by Ray Stannard
Baker, in the January McClure's.
Ourselves and Others.
Mrs. Russell Sage is one of the most
active workers of the movement to abol
ish the docking of the tails ot horses.
In a discussion of this movement she
said recently:
"If the horses already docked were out
of the way, we should have no trouble
In putting a stop to docking forever. But
many persons, advocates of our move
ment in the past, no sooner buy a pair
of show-y carriage horses witli docked
tails than they desert us and go over to
the enemy."
She smiled sadly.
"It is the old story," she said. "White
owned a dog. Black, who lived next door,
came, to him and said:
" 'Look here, that dog of yours howls
so much at night that my wife and 1 are
going mad for want of sleep.'
" 'Is that so?" said White. T hadn't no
ticed his howling. I think you must be
mistaken.'
"A week passed and Black oame lioive
one day with the objectionable dog on a
strme.
" '1 have bought this cur. Vie told his
wife. "I have bought it from Whit
1 am going to chloroform it.' 1
"Another w-eek and White, the dog's
former owner, said to Black
" 'You haven't chloroformed that dog
yet. have you?
" 'Why. no, not yet.' Black answered.
'The fact is. we have grown rather fond
of the critter, he is so playful and affec
tionate.' " 'But doesn't his barking annoy you?
White asked.
" 'No. I haven't noticed it.' said Black.
" 'Well.' White grumbled. 'I can't sleep
for the brute's 'continual howling.' "
Mrs. Sage smiled again.
"In the rase of ourselves it is one thing;
in the case of others it is a different mat
ter," she said. Washington Post.
Why She Yielded.
A small man sat in the corner of a
subway car. An extremely thin and
very well dressed woman sat down
next him. but placed herself exactly
on the live dividing two seats. The
car fileld up and strap hangers were
much in evidence. A man tried to
sit down between the woman and the
man in the corner. He gave it up.
Another tried on the other side, with
the same lack of success and he, too,
joined the strap brigade. At Four
teenth street more people crowded into
the car, but the thin woman serenely
held her position. At length the man
in the corner said, mildly:
"Madame, you are occupying two
seats."
The woman gave him a scornful
look and glancing at her attenuated
proportions said. very emphatically:
"Certainly not, sir."
"I did not say you were filling
them," answered the man.
A smile rippled from face to face
like a summer wave on a sandy beach.
The woman slid hastily away from the
man in the corner and incidentally
landed in the middle of a seat, where
upon the fat man clinging to a strap
sank slowly and heavily into the va
cant space, with a deep sigh of satis
faction, and peace reigned once more.
Exchange.
Senator Reveridgc Dutch?
In The World's Work for January, in
"The Last of the Territories." M. G.
Cunniff reports the sharp retort of a
Mexican in reply to Senator Beveridge.
He says:
Some of the residents of New Mexico
are descendants of aristccratic Spanish
families still conducting in almostfeudal
fashion vast sheep ranges in larids
granted to their ancestors by the Span
ish crown. Or they are progressive bus
iness men differing no more from their
American associates than the casual
Germans or Jews or Frenchmen with
whom they daily do business. They are
Spaniards or Mexicans, but American
ized. Senator Beveridge, on a flying
trip of investigation through the terri
tories, asked Mr. Isidro Armijo, the pro
bate clerk of Donna Ana county, if he
were not a Mexican.
"No." was the reply.
"But your parents were Mexican?"
asked the senator.
: "Yes," said Mr. Armijo, "and yours
were German, but that doesn't make
you Dutch."
Old Wine ii. New Bottles.
I would not so much mind a person
modernizing an old story, but I do re
sent it when a man makes himself an
actor in an ancient story. One of the
oldest anecdotes, stories, or whatever
you wish to call it, in the world is that
of a sign bearing the name: "I
Ketchum; U. Cheatam." I heard a man
say once that he had seen this sign. I
did not tell him that he had not, for it
wouid have been rude: but I might have
told him that if he had his eyes must
have looked a long way into the past.
This combination of names, of course, is
made up. Such a sign never existed.
But there did until very recently exist In
New York city a firm of women doctors
by the name of Ketchum, Peckham &
Killam. The Critic.
fr
THE EVENING STOR
lie Time ol Her Life.
(By Constance D'Archy Mackay.) .
One morning, when Billy and I were
lingering over our rolls and coffee, Bet
ty came in with a tragic air and an
open letter m her hand.
"Listen to this!" she exclaimed.
Eleanor Cuyler is coming to New
i oik to-visit her aunt, and she says
she simply must see us, because she's
always wanted to visit the 'shores of
Bohemia!' " .
"The shores of what?" said Billy.
I in sure there's nothing' Bohemian
about us.
"That's just it." wailed Betty. "But
Miss Cuyler doesn't see it that way
She's daft, about people who do
things,' and she says .she's never met
any, so she begs that she may come to
dinner some night (quit- informally)
and be one of us. She thinks that be
cause Kate writes, and you're an artist
and we all live in a little fiat I mean
apartment that we are well, that
wo are queer and unconventional
"Who is this Eleanor Cuyler?" said
Billy with a frown.
"She's a Philadelphia girl Kate and
I met when we were in the mountains
last summer. She was awfully nice to
us in ever so many ways, and now it's
our turn to do something for her. It's
no use suggesting the matinee or a
luncheon. Elenor s rich as Croesus,
and tired of all that. And there's noth
ing else we can afford. Oh, I don't see
what we're going to do." And B-tty
puckered her brows in despair.
'Do," cried Billy. "Why, it's as plain
as day! Satisfy her craving for the
unconventional! If we're not Bohem
ians, we can at least nut up a good im
itation of the real thing. We can ask
the Englishman, Harry Rockminster
he'll add a continental flavor. And
there's Periy Dash wood, he can sing
stein songs better than anyone I ever
knew. We'll get Cynthia to come and
recite, and Worthlngton to bring his
violin. They can pretend they're pro
fessionals. Cynthia will be an actress
just starting on her career, and Worth
ington a struggling musician 'strug
gling' is the right touch, isn't it? And
let's see this is Monday. Write and in
vite Miss Cuyler for Wednesday even
ing. Bohemians aren't supposed to give
much notice when they ask people to
their parties." And Billy looked over
at me and laughed. He's the dearest
brother in the world, and always comes
to the rescue when Betty and I are
hopelessly cast down.
While Betty was jubilantly writing
her note I went to explain things to
Aunt Pattie. Aunt Pattie has mother
ed us ever since we were children, and
nothing we do ever surprises her, so she
fel lin with our plan at once. "But I
couldn't be a Bohemian if I tried." she
declared. "I wouldn't know how- to
act, and I'd make you all miserable and
myself, too. You can easily excuse my
absence,"
"But you'll miss all the fun," I ob
jected. Aunt Battle's eyes twinkled. "Oh. I
mean to be there!" she cried. "Since
we have no maid I'm going to serve
the dinner myself."
In vain we all protested, coaxed, com
manded. Aunt Pattie was firm in in
sisting that as Miss Cuyler had never
seen her it could make no possible dif
ference. Yet somehow- it did to me, for
I could imagine with what horror my
Englishman might look on such pro
ceedings. Even after I had written to
him and explained the circumstances, I
was tortured by misgivings. For, al
though he didn't know it, his good opin
ion mattered more to me than anything
else in the world!
All Wednesday Betty and I worked
like majors. We had always -ather
prided ourselves on the artistic ar
rangement of our little parlor. Now, in
order to make it look Bohemian, we
had banked It with all the bizarre and
startling things we could lay our hands
on. Billy's delicate water .olor sketch
es were jostled by flamboyant posters,
theatrical photographs adorned the
mantle and sundry pipes and ash trays
littered the table. It certainly looked
queer, but as Betty and I confessed to
ourselves, we didn't. Betty was demure
In a erav eown. and I wore my black
net. I was just fastening one of Harry
Rockminster's roses in my hair when
the bell rang.
"There she is!" cried Betty hysteric
ally. "Now don't act as if anything un
usual were happening!"
Eleanor Cuyler was enthusiastic in
her greeting, and she was still telling
of her Jov in seeing us when we crossed
the threshold of the parlor. At sight of
the room she smothered a little gasp,
which showed that our work had not
been in vain. Then Billy came forward,
and the loose blouse and soft tie which
he wore for the occasion made him look
as if he had stepped straight out of
the Latin Quarter. But Miss Cuyler
wasn't any more surprised at his ap
pearance than he was at hers. Somehow-
neither Betty nor I had told him
what a beauty Miss Cuyler was a child
ish little beauty with a fluff of golden
hair, and deep blue eyes that opened
very wide when anything astonished
her.
Perry Dashwood and Harry Rock
minster came early, but there wasn't a
sign of Cynthia and Worthington.
"They're half an hour late already."
said Betty to me in an aside. "What
on earth can be keeping them?. I'm
afraid the dinner will be spoiled."
Something of our uneasiness reached
Billy, and he turned abruptly to Betty.
"I really think we'd better not wait
for the others." he said. "They may be
quite late. You never can tell what may
happen on the shores of Bohemia."
But we were hardly seated before
we heard the turn of Worthington's
latch key, and the swish of Cynthia's
skirt down the hall. She made a
dramatic pause at the dining room
door, and looked perfectly dazzling in
a crimson Spanish costume, glittering
with spangles.
"I hope you won't mind my coming
in costume." she said. "AVe were kept
late at rehearsal, and there wasn't
time to change. I met Worthlngton
on the stairs. she continued non
chalantly. "He'll be in in a moment.
He's a musician, Miss Cuyler, and you
know what uncertain hours thev are
forced to keen especially when thev
are young and struggling."
Cynthia moved toward her chair
with sinuous grace. She said after
wards that the Spanish costume had
entered into her blood, and she
wasn't responsible for anything she
did. Neither was Worthington, for he
wore a peculiar, shabby black coat,
and carried his violin under his arm.
But his crowning glory was his hair,
or perhaps I should say his wig, which
was very long and straight.
" 'The Music Master.' by Jove!"
ejaculated Harry Rockminster.
A'et not once did a triumphant
gleam illumine the eyes of Signor
Worthington. To this day I've always
wondered how he managed to keep
that dreamy abstracted expression. Of
course I knew- I could count on Cyn
thia and Worthington, but I never
knew- I could count on them to such
an extent as that. Eleanor Cuyler was
delighted. She looked at them, and
llslined to them in open-eyed wonder
as if thev were beings from another
world. And all my fears of what
Harry Rockminster would think were
set at rest when he whispered, "I say,
isn't this a stunning lark!"
And now if Aunt Pattie didn't act too
much like a lady, our Bohemian din
ner would be a complete success. But
one false note would ruin everything.
I toyed with the grape fruit as long as
possible. Then I rang the bell. As I
did so I kept my eyes fixed on Billy.
He sat opposite the kitchen door, and
would be the first to see Aunt Pattie.
The kitchen door creaked, swung open,
and the expression on Billy's face sig
nalled me that something had hap
pened.
"Aunty." he burst out. and then
checked himself.
From behind me came a soft voice
with the pleasant slurred accent of the
south. "I reckon you'ss 'sprlsed to see
me, Marsr Billy! You didn't know I
was to cook do dinnar, did you?"
I turned and beheld Aunt Pattie!
And yet not Aunt Pattie! j For the fac
that beamed from beneath a bandana
turban was as black as the ace of
spades!
To Miss Cuyler this apparition w
nothing more than a loquacious, dusky
servant, but the rest of us were in
ecstasies of mirth. We have vowed
ever since that v. e owed th w hole suc
cess of the evening to Aunt Pattie:. for
not only was the dinner deliciously
cooked and splendidly served, but it
went with a whirl. Harry Rockmin
ster was never more brilliant in his
life, and told stories of marvelous
escapades in which he had taken part.
Cynthia recited "Lasca" with true dra
matic fervor. Between courses Worth
ington played snatches on his violin,
and we all sang songs songs for
which Perry made up funny im
piomptu choruses. The men smoked
and through the blue haze shone the
radiant face of Miss Cuyler.
When dinner was over she leaned
back in her chair with a little sigh.
"It's just as I fancied Bohemia would
be." she declared. "Oh, what fun you
all must have gathering round the
table this way every evening. Of
course, it's Just a common occurrence
to you. but I shall never forget it.
Never! And I can't thank you enough,
for this glimpse of it."
Billy said she thanked him fervent
ly again when he saw her to her car
riage. "I've had the time of my life,"
she reiterated. "The time of my iife!"
"Well, she wasn't the only one."
said Worthington. He had taken off
his wig and was mopping his brow
while the rest of us sat about the din
ing room table nibbling at the remains
of dessert, and teasing Aunt Pattie to
have something more substantial
than lobster salad and a cup of cof
fee. "Miss Cuyler did seem to appreciate
it." said Cynthia.
"Appreciate!" cried Billy. "I think
it's we who ought to appreciate her
coming! Why, just to look at her is
a feast! She has exactly the kind of
eyes I want for my 'Queen Titania.' "
"Why don't you ask her to pose for
it. then?" suggested Cynthia slyly.
"I have," answered Billy quite sim
ply, "and we are going to begin to
morrow." "Whiff!" sniffed Betty. "I smell
orange blossoms!" And under cover
of the laughter Harry turned to me.
"Miss Cuyler's had the time of her
life. Billy's had the time of his, and
there's just one thing waiting to give
me the time of mine." His lips were
smiling, but there was no mistaking
the look in his eyes.
"I'd hate to spoil jour evening by
saying 'no. " I w-hispered back. And
then, although I was so happy, I had
an absurd desire to crv. and if Billy
hadn't suddenly Interrupted with a
toast to the shores of Bohemia good
ness knows what might have happen
ed. (Copy, 1906, by K. A. White
head.) 'Mv Uncle Tollivef is coming up to visit
me next week," says a raiddle-axed arch
itect. "He'll want to go to the theater.
and I'm sorry there's nothing Shakes
pearean to take him to see. He hasn't
been inside a heater since I took him to
see Othello' years ago. After the play I
asked him how- he. liked it.
' 'Well, said he. I didn t see but what
the coon did as well as any of them." "
New York Mail.
Scene Hairdresser's shop.
Barber to Customer Razor all right.
sir?
Customer My dear man. if you haunt
mentioned it I'd never have known thero
was a razor on my face.
Rnroer Thank you!
Customer (continuing I thought you
were using a file. Puck.
"Don't you think. Miss Sharp." said th
clergyman, "that since marriage is such
a holy thing it is singular marriages are
not made in heaven?"
"Perhaps, sir." replied the young wo
man, "it is difficult to find a clergyman
there." Boston Transcript.
"I think." declared the little daughter
of the widow to the millionaire, who was
calling, "that you are a charming and de
lightful man."
"How nice! What makes you think so?'
"Mamma told me to." Tit-Bits.
GLOBE SIGHTS.
fFrom the Atchison Globe!
Love may come like a summer's sigh,
but It goes in a manner to waken the en
tire neighborhood.
When a man doesn't want to take his
wife places he gays he would like to but
that she wouldn't be Interested.
There are too many men marrying who
could be caught by the heels and shaken,
and the price of a cook stove wouldn't
fall out of their pockets.
Answer to correspondent: No. that
piece of chamois a girl carries is not to
wipe her shoes, though the color looks
It: It is to dust off her complexion.
An engaged girl doesn't think less of
her girl friends than she used to, but she
has to drop them temporarily to keep
them from breaking in when He Is
there.
When a friend turns around and upside
down the piece of silverware you gave,
it is not so much to get the effect of dif
ferent views as to see if it is marked
sterling.
It is funny how a man w-iil get up In
church and confess that he is the chief
of sinners, ar.d deny it at home if any
one accused him of simply being tin out
side guard at the Sinners' club.
The Mothers' Mngazine. a new Elgin.
111., publication, asks this ouestion: "How
shall we fntertain the children on a Sun
day afternoon?" AVe don't know what
they do in Elgin. 111., but In Atchison
they send them over to annoy the neigh
bors. The Society of Whales Is a new organi
zation. Every young wife In town be
longs, and the title of the society Is ta
ken from the faith in a bride has in her
husband: She would believe him if he
said he saw a whale swimmips up Com
mercial street. After she lias been mar
ried for a few months she drops from tho
club.
The man who can carry a tune may b
useful at church and in the parlor, but
he should have an out-door job In tho
middle of an SO-aere farm.
There is many a woman wIth a Madonna-like
face who loses the resemb
lance to all who have seen her haggle
over the price of a mackerel.
REFLECTIONS OF A BACHELOR!.
From the New York Press.!
When a woman trusts her husband it is
a sign she doesn't let him know- it.
People can be friends as long as they
don't try to prove anything to each other.
Generally a girl picks out the wrnr?
man to fall in love with once; but the
man does it n hundred times.
Lots more bachelors would become hus
bands if their married friends weren't
always trying to convince them that it
isn't all miser;'.
The difference between a man and a
woman with money is that she can have
Just as much fun spending ten dollars ns
a hundred If she can spend every cent
of it.
NVM0R OF THE 'DAY j
L j
;1