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THE TOPEKA DAILY STATE JOTOETAIr-FRIDAY EVENING, JULY 12, 1907, TOPEEA STATE JOLTiIVL. 9. By FRAXK P. MAO LENNAN. r Entered July I. 1S7B. as second-class matter at the poatofTica at Topeka, K-aJJ- noei ne act ur congraa.j VOLUME XXXIV No. 168 Official Paper City of Tope km. i IEBM3 OF SUBSCRIPTION. -DjIly edition, delivered by car-ler. 10 rents a week to u nart of Toai. or uburbs, or at the soma price te any Kan- towa where ttn paper has a carrier ystem. . , If,,"11, three months... ,2 Saturday editv.n rtn on year...- ! TELEPHOSBfl gusfneea office Reporters Room ? 52 EfPortera- Room Jn2 -X I PFRHANKNT HOME. Tnek Btate Journal bu'latmr. no rfi? Kanaaa avenue, eorntf of Eighth. . N'f York office: Flallron huildine. at "wenty-thfrd street, comer Fifth avenue Broadway. Paul Bloelt manager. . ChfcHM nfT1w Hartford building. P" "lock, manarer. full ieiei irmK rfport OP THR ASSOCIATED PRf3' The Slate Journal is a member of the AsKoclated Preiis and receives the run nay leleeTBpt renort of that (Treat news or rsnfzatfon for the exclusive afterr.con triplication in Totielta. The ntTxrM im reorfvM In The fftate jour, Hl building oyer wires for this sola pur- foe. HOME NEWS WHILE AWAY. ' Snrwcrlber of the Statw Tonrnal way dnrtnar the Kumm.-r may have the paper mailed regtilnrlv -:ieh day t any address at the rate or ten cents ft week or thirty cents a month ;?y mall only). AiMres ?hamcd as often a desired. While Out ot town the State Journal .vlll be eo you like a dally letter from home. Advance payment la reqnestefi on these short time subscription, t& Mf2 bookkeeping expr ' " In the meantime Mr. Schmitz will liave plenty of time to practice up new pieces on his fladle. " Harry Orchard's confession that he ta a liar appears to have been amply proved by the defense. ... . There is this about City Attorney trenning: Nobody can charge that he doesn't try to earn his salary. Fairbanks saved a chambermaid from drowning-. Now who will save the Fairbanks presidential boom? Incidentally there are also fewer college boys taking- their vacations in the harvest fields this year than usual. Russia thinks Japan can lick the United States. "Now let's hear from Spain," suggests the Lawrence World. , By the way, was Mr. Rockefeller in such a hurry to get away from Chicago that he forgot to draw his witness fees? One of the funny things about The Hague peace conference is that it spends its time in formulating rules for making war. ; It "appears thatr'HrieTe are at' least two kinds of detectives. McParland, at present at Boise, -is representative Ot one kind; Burns, of San Francisco, of another. i "Governor Hughes, of New York. Wants to "put a damper on the man who talks without " thinking." If he Succeeds there will be a great slump in the talk market. i Since that heroic-rescue Fairbanks sjtory was set afloat, the Fairbanks supporters have been glancing in the direction of Taft with a beat-that-lf-you-can expression. : Another temperance sermon by the Atchison Globe: "Instead of taking your money to the joints and getting two per cent, take it to the banks and get three per cent." Now that Schmitz and Ruef are in Jail, Prosecutor Heney's next task is to send the ' corporation magnates who bought them to keep them company, and he says he will do it. The unwritten law is soundly de nounced In written language all over the country, but that makes little dif ference to Judge Loving, of Virginia. It worked all right In his case. It mieht have been known that the appointment of W. B. Ham to any sort of a public office like that of attorney to the railroad board would not be satisfactory to some people. You will note that the dispatch con cerning Mr. Falrbank's rescue of a chambermaid from drowning said nothing about his swimming to her assistance!.. Those who have seen Mr. Fairbanks will readily guess that he waded. - It U said that the state railroad com missioners will walk over those por tions of the Missouri Pacific that are alleged to be in bad condition. As the Missouri Pacific has over 2,300 miles of track in Kansas, the commissioners have considerable exercise ahead of them. ' ' - - Yon will notice that it is the cor respondent of a British paper who is the latest to find, out a lot of things that are not so about the alleged trou ble between America and Japan. It Is barely possible that - some British Journals would also enjoy a war be tween these two nations.. , ...1 ' v The report that a .Kansas house wife had a narrow escape from death while washing dishes,", remarks the Omaha Bee, "is significant only as showing that there still is a Kansas housewife who washes dishes." Yes, there are a few who do It Just to keep in. practice. . And it might be stated that they keep in practice a good deal. .- James Rudolph Isn't the only one of the Garfield boys who is making a mark In the world. His brother, Harry. - A. Garfield, has been elected president of Williams college, of which not only President Garfield was an alumnus, but from which all of his sons likewise graduated. For the past three years Harry A. Garfield has been filling the chair of politics at Princeton, which he will resign to be come the president of Williams next year. AN ACKNOWLEDGMENT. It is a well-established maxim in the Journalistic world that among a newspaper's best assets are its ene mies, If they are the right kind. In fact, a newspaper, even more than an individual, is known' by the enemies it keeps. For that reason the State Journal takes considerable pleasure in the belief that Colonel Joe Richards, political agent for the Missouri Pacific railway, had this paper in mind when he wrote the following paragraph in closing a letter to the Fort Scott Tri bune: "Nor will I stop here to quarrel with your paper for giving unstinted and unjustifiable publication to such libel ous and infamous matter as you picked up from the spawning of the scurrilous Topeka sheet, which no toriously lives only from the excre tion of scandalous, scrofulous and di abolical matter, and to which mem ory the imps of perdition discount ing the future, if not ingrates, should push up before the sulphuric ciouds of huge black shaft with the inscrip tion: " "Dedicated to the Prince of Liars.' " While the colonel's pen evidently stubbed Its toe or twisted its tongue in that last sentence, making it impos sible to understand just what he is trying to say, we take it for granted that he meant all right by-making It bad as possible. The more vitu peration one receives from some sources the more creditable it Is, and the State Journal therefore desires to thank the colonel for this evidence of his ill will. This paper has made a practice to carefully cultivate the disfavor of cer tain kinds of Individuals. There were Colonel Richards' old political pals, for instance, Joseph Ralph Burton and Thomas Todd Kelly. The former has had little use for the State Journal since it began opposing him politically years ago, and it is suspected that Mr. Kelly has not been fond of this publication record. ' Possibly the distinguished railroad lobbyist of Fort Scott was first dis pleased at the policy of this paper when it told the facts about the careers of these friends of his, and its course in later years has not been of a character to mollify his ill will. The State Jour nal has not favored railroad domination In politics. The colonel has been pos sessed of an ambition to be a political factor In Kansas, and this journal has not done anything to promote that- am bltion not if it knew it. Of late years even his home county has decided to dispense with his services as a delegate to Republican state conventions, which has not softened the colonel's feelings towards those who oppose his ambitions. But there are some things about Col onel Richards which this paper can com mend, notwithstanding his attempted harsh statements concerning this pur veyor of news. For one thing, the col onel is thoroughly representative of the road for which he is the Kansas lobby ist. It has the reputation of being the poorest road in Kansas. Its ties are said to be rotten and its rails worn out. It Invariably tries to do things the wrong way. It is tremendously unpopular. For these reasons the State Journal Is grateful to the colonel for making pub lic his enmity towards it. Colonel Rich ards Is typical of the worst kind of rail road domination in affairs or govern ment, and his opposition is something to be desired. As has been repeatedly pointed out in these columns, there are good and conscientious men in the employ of the railroads even among railroad attor-neys---men whose personal friendship and good opinion are worth having. The approval of Colonel Richards, however, would lead this paper to suspect that something was wrong with it. Hence this acknowledgment of Its gratitude for his 111 will. STILL AT IT. A. G. Gates, who, as chaplain of the state reformatory at Hutchinson, tried to bring about a reform in the manage ment of that institution, is now connect ed with a Hutchinson business college, but incidentally he is keeping up his work of trying to bring about better methods of reforming the boys and young men who are sent to the reforma tory. Mr. Gates made a recent address In a Hutchinson pulpit, and, as reported in the News of that place, he "tried to show the folly of the endeavor to stop crime and cure the criminal by torture; that if skill and science and Christian principles are essential in dealing with the physically sick man, they are all the more essential In dealing with the morally sick man; that men directing the affairs of such institutions should be themselves, one and all, proper ex amples of clean manhood and thorough students of all that pertains to the causes of crime and the greater science Of treating the criminal; that the wrongs and cruelties inflicted upon the inmates of many of our penal institu tions designed by the state for the cor rection and cure of these wayward youths are often many fold greater and graver than the crimes of these men against society. The cure of the 'Moral Cripple,' If a real cure at all Is effected, as we all well know, can result only by the application of the great remedies of the Great Physician. And to apply such remedies with skill, true sympathy and honest purpose is the work of men who must have such service in the true spirit of the Master." Mr. Gates was "resigned" from his post as chaplain for preaching this sort of- doctrine, but he appears to have con tinued in the reforming business, just the same. A Texas paper says that Texas will soon produce eighty per cent of the onion crop of this country. Why does a paper want to run down Its own state like that? "It's a wonder," Bays the Atchison Globe, "people do not hate George Washington and Abe Lincoln: they are so. much admired." Well, they were cordially hated in their day. The Britishers had no use for George, and the slaveholders thought x Abe ' was about the worst ever; It'a a poor statesman. who doesn't have some sort of enemies. A man named Cooley, who happens to be superintendent of the - Chicago schools, has been elected president of me .aiionai .educational association. Of course, this Is in a measure, fame, but it hardly comes up to the biand of fame that another member of - the Cooley family has corralled, as any baseball fan can testify. ' The first paragraph in the bulletin of a prominent Topeka church asks the women to remove their hats during the sermon, and almost one in ten complies with the request. - An Oklahoma editor puts forth this plea: "My friend, help the editor in his wildeyed search for news. When your friends come to you. If you are not ashamed of it, tell him; when your wife gives a tea party, if you have re covered from the effect of the gossip drop in with the news; when a baby arrives fill your pockets with cigars and call; if you go to a party, steal some of the good things and leave 'em with the item in our sanctum, if your wife licks you, come in and let us see your scars and tender sympathy through the paper. If your mother-in- law has died, don't be bashful about u. lve in all the commonplace news. In short, whatever makes you feel proud, sad, lonesome or glad submit it to our 24 carat wisdom and see our matted locks part and stand up on end with gratitude, which will pour from every pore like moisture from a dew-beBprinkled earth.". This department takes .no stock in that old story of the man who, while Spading up the warden, pretended to find a quarter and then a half dollar, thereby . working his wife up to the point of spading up the whole garden in the hone of making similar finds. This department, we repeat, takes rio stock In the story. It never worked for us. . J AY HA WKER JOTS The Minneapolis Messenger has a new uniform. Young Stuyvesant Fish did not go to Salina but to Muskogee, Okla., which leads Walter Johnson to believe that Fish cannot recognizo good bait when he sees it. " One stroke of lightning killed nearly forty heaa of cattle up in Gra ham county the other day. They were standing by a wire fence, as usual in such accidents. . '- . A Sabetha boy, rushed to his moth er under great excitement last week. "Mom," he said, "I ain't goin' to eat nothin" but game rooster aigs after this so I will be a good fighter." Out at Abilene the automobiles went into the passenger transportation business on the Fourth and nearly drove the hacks out of business. The Reflector says th speed limit was broken 874 times during the day. Salina Union: Here Is Kansas pluck ' for you as. It la- displayed and recognized in every county. Clarence Olson, young lawyer, formerly from Marquette, but now of Honolulu, was retained by the executors in a $350, 000 estate. There was. a tijree corner ed fight among the executor, a trustee named in the will, and the heirs. He won the case and the attorneys for the heirs felt that they got such a drubbing that they offered Clarence a nlac.e in the firm as a partner. He accepted and now he is a member of the best law firm on me lsiana Clarence is a native of Marquette, a graduate of Bethany and Harvard law school. He has many friends in Sa una and thev naturally rejoice to learn that he is making such head way. The story of Wathena, told by RalDh Tennal: When the writer of this was a little tad and lived in Troy. Kansas, if a person wanted to desig nate the most worthless spot on eartn he said it was as no 'count as Wa thena. Wathena. the town half a dozen miles this side of St. Joseph was surrounded by a country that was rugged, rocky, hilly and apparently worthless. For many years there was no attem.pt to do anything wltn tne eround. People merely existed there, The population was for most part the riffraff from St. Joseph, idle, lazy ignorant. But there was some good blood In the town, and it coursed through veins of men and women who were convinced that there was not a corner of Kansas that could not be turned to profitable use. These few people beean the growing of straw berries. The soil seemed suited to that ourpose. and the end of a suc cessful strawberry season was follow ed by trying blackberries. This crop was even a greater success, xne in dustry was increased until now thou sands of acres, or every available piece of ground in the vicinity of Wathena is planted to berries. It Is the great esc berry raising section in the state of Kansas and one of the greatest in the west. The poor people became enthused with the idea and bought ground at $10 an acre for which they now could easily secure $200 an acre. Last week Wathena shipped five car loads of berries in one day by freight. followed by fifteen car loads by ex press lots. Twenty car loads of ber ries a week shipped from Wathena Is an ordinary matter, ana irequenuy the shipments amount to six car loads a day. 'rnis is in aaaiuon to me vast quantity of berries taken by the waaron load to the St. Joseph market. Great is Kansas. There is not a square foot in her domain that Is not worth cultivating. . POINTED PARAGRAPHS. From the Chicago News. A real good man doesn't have to use words to tell it. Falling in love Is almost as easy as falling out again. Professional pugilists carry their for tunes in their fists. To the tramp every man looks like an enemy except another tramp. The bleached blonde's method of keeping her hair light is a dark secret. Anyway the man who has no friends doesn't have to worry about losing them. The worst thing about work is that some men do too much and others not enough. We don't know, Cordelia, but doubt less Mother Nature and Father Time are twins. Even In this land of the free no 'man has the right to take unwarranted lib erties. .' A young widow never tires of trying to convince some bachelor of the error of his ways. i I JOVRNAL ENTRIES j KANSAS COMMENT SOME GOOD DOCTRINE. Wherein is your son advanced in any particular by using an airguh? It cre ates in him the desire to kill. No one can use a gun without wanting to hit tne mam with it. First the mark is a tin can, then a sparrow, then a robin, and possibly your neighbors' chickens. The gun habit is a bad one, a dangerous one, and one abolished by law in all cities. The air rifle starts it, then comes the 22" rifle, then the Winchester and finally the revolver.-- The vast number of murders, which .result in the habit of gun totin doubtless originate in a boy being presented with an airgun in his childhood. Give your boy a camera, I fishing rod, a bicycle, or one of the hun dreds of boy articles- he can use with pleasure and profit. Teach him to fear and hate a life-taking weapon. Sabetha Herald. CUT THE WEEDS. Don't you think the town would look a whole lot better to the visiting stran ger, and be a whole lot healthier for those who live here, if the weeds were cut and the rubbish cleaned up and burned from off the streets, alleys and vacant lots It would cost each of us a few dimes or a little effort to do this, but we believe it would be time and money ' well spent, and we believe it ought to be done, Clean up and put the streets in' shape with the poll tax, and then, if need be, compel every prop erty owner to mow the weeds and burn the rubbish on his personal premises. Minneapolis Messenger. LET, IT GO. Secrtary-Wilson 'has replied to Secret tary Coburn. Wilson claims credit for all that has been done of recent years to propagate Turkey red wheat in Kansas. The best thing Coburn can do is to allow Wilson's claim to stand, although it is not true. Only a few weeks ago Wilson wrote to Kansas advising wheat raisers to try Turkey red wheat. Now he saya he Is the fellow who Induced Kansas farmers generally,, twenty years ago, to raise that kind of wheat. A fellow who induces a state to take his advice and then doesn't know that the state Is do ing so is too funny to need answering. Lawrence World. ON THE MOVE. During the past six years the saloons have been driven out of 400 cities in the state of Tennessee. They are now run ning in only three cities in that state. In a spech at Nashville, last Sunday Sen ator Carmack was widely cheered when he predicted that Ihe "time was near when men, not now young, would live to see the day when there would not be a saloon in any land where men go to church and children to school." Jewell Republican. ' s PERHAPS. It Is often hard -to obtain the proper point of view. The canary bird's cheer ful warble may be only Its plaintive plea for liberty, while : the torn cat's wail may be in reality . the outpouring of a love-thrilled heart Mack Cretcher. RING OFF. English women are back of a move ment to make every married man wear a ring on his third finger. Some Ameri can women think every husband should wear a ring through his nose. Anna Carlson, . ; JOHN DIPN-T GIGGLE. The dispatches ffannounce that John D. Rockefeller- was dignified while on the witness stand.,' Who suspected that he would titter while being examined and would probably play "a prank or two on the court? Wichita Beacon. FROM OTHER PENS KANSAS. Kansas must- choose. She must either increase her population, or de crease her wheat crop. Every year now the story is the same. There is more wheat than help to handle it. The harvester becomes the most im portant man of the hour. Everybody wants him. Everybody needs him. Wages high enough to make him dizzy are dangled before his eyes. He is brought from a distance in a Pull man car, and driven to the field in a coach-and-four. He is fed on the fat of the land. He ends the season al most a plutocrat. And yet it was only a few years ago that the farmers of Kansas were In such straits they want ed to change the character of the na tional government in an effort to es cape from their woes. Great is Amer ica! And the farmer is now the favorite son. Washington Star. STIFFENING DIVORCE LAWS. Sioux Falls is doing a rushing di vorce business pending a stiffening up of South Dakota s divorce laws. The legislature passed a stricter law, but it has to go to the people on a referendum. Meanwhile, tremendous business. It is said that South Da kotans are serious in their resolution to check the export divorce evil. They are actually going to insist that un happy visitors from elsewhere shall stay a whole year in the state before getting their freedom from the chains. New York- Tribune. JUST LIKE JAPAN'S KICK. And now there Is the prospect of an international complication which may cause us to understand Japan's posi tion. The American ambassador to Italy has notified the Italian govern ment that the United States protests against American theological students In Rome being mobbed to make an anti-clerical holiday. Boston Tran script. WHAT MARK GOT. With the degree of doctor of litera ture, Lord Curzon "handed Mark Twain the following: "Vir Jocundissime, lepidissime, facetiossime, qui totus orbis terrarum latera natlva tua hilaritate concuti, ego auctoritate mea et totius universitatis admitto te ad gradum doctoris in literas honoris causa." Huckleberry Finn would probably have been shocked. If not insulted, by such language. Los Angeles News. WHO WILL FOOT THE BILL? If the Japanese are really going to insist upon a scrimmage with this country they must not expect to bor row the money of us to pay their part of the expenses of it. Philadelphia Press. - " AN EVEN BREAK. Mr. Tauje of Japan comes with the cheering intelligence that Japan has no present intention of wiping us off the map. Same here. We have no yearning to occupy Tokio with an ex peditionary force. Minneapolis Jour nal. AMERICAN STANDARDS. A man who steals $10 from an other's pocket goes to jail..- But the man wno grarts $1. 000, 000 is orten as proud and prominent a citizen as the man who steals a baan. Louisville Courier-Journal. , ! SONNET OF A CHORUS GIRL. He waits beside the entrance every night. And when we've et till I can't hold no more He takea ma in a hnnnm tn mv door: . -It may be that htn aJn't nn vprv briaht. But that don't tie no ribbons he's all right! ' I never met n kinrtpr erent before: It's sweet to hear the way he can fan rlore The right to buy me everything in sight. I Wonder if hia fnlka wilt ralsa a row - When him and me goes home to get their blesein'T Well, I can tell them one thing anyhow: If they freeee up on me they'll learn His slstera mav be nroud. but I'll allow Them handicaps and keep them busy -- suessin . ' Chicago Record-Herald. Snap Shots of Detectives. Have you ever noticed to use an Irishism that you hardly ever notice the portraits of Scotland Tara aetec fives in the illustrated papers until they are either retired, or are Just about to retire? . Did you, for instance, know how Detective Inspector Walsh looked prior to. his quitting his service the other day, or were you familiar with Chief inspector Arrow's features un til he accepted a month or .two ago, the post of chief of police of Barce lona? If you think carefully over these two questions, you will have to confess to yourself that you are unable to an swer either of them in the affirmative, the reason being that neither of the officers mentioned was ever previously photographed for publication. This is one of the many unwritten laws of Scotland Yard. Nevertheless, there is hardly a de tectlve in London who has not been photographed over and over again, for the simple reason that there is in existence a class of men who make a specialty of snapshoting police officers, with a view to selling the portraits so obtained to professional criminals. Such photographs are, for-obvious reasons, greatly Bought af ter. Certain detectives make a specialty of certain lines or crime. one, for example, aeais witn coiners, another with an arcmsts ana undesirable aliens gen erally, and so on. All really high class criminals also specialize in crime. There you have the thing in a nutshell. For a professional coiner to be familiar with the features of the man who is on the lookout for him is, from his point Of view, eminently de sirable. And he usually Is familiar with them, thanks to the snapshotters, themselves for the most part criminals or ex-criminals. In fact, one notorious counterfeiter arrested the other day by a clever ruse, was found to be in possession, not only of the photo graphs of the men who arrested him but of carefully tabulated written dscriptions of them into the bargain. .Pearson's Weekly. Paper Pails for Milk. For years London's milk supply has been blamed by medical men and health officers for a great deal of the infant mortality. Now the dairy companies are to de liver milk at the doors of houses in pa per pails or pitchers, which are said to be absolutely proof against germs and water. The paper palls are being made at a new factory at the rate of 50,000 daily, but they will require to be turned out at the rate of some millions daily if the demand is to be met. These milk pails, made from wood pulp, ean, of course, be usedT only once, says What, to Eat. But they will be cheaper than metal pails, pitchers, or glass bottles, for one reason, because all labor of cleaning and sterilizing will be saved. The pall is a simple contrivance, twelve times lighter than the ordinary milk can, is strongly made, and is fin ished off, after . being rendered water proof, by being sterilized in a furnace heated up to500 degrees Fahrenheit. Every pail has a close-fitting flanged cover which can be quickly adjusted and when fixed effectually seals the milk from any outside influence. New York Sun. Cannon Balls of Stone. On either side of the entrance to the Naval Asylum, on Gray's Ferry Road, is an immense stone sphere, measuring about twenty-five inches in diameter. . There is a legena tnat these were used or intended for use in a Turkish mortar, "the largest piece of ordnance in the world. These balls were given to the insti-. tution soon after its founding by Commodore J. D. Elliott, who ob tained them during a cruise on the frigate Constitution in European wa ters. An Inscription on one of the balls relates that they were obtained on the Asiatic side of the Dardenelles, and it is within the realme of possi bility that the Turks may have in tended them to serve as shot in- a mortar. It is also more than prob able that with sufficient powder to project thm the stones would have been badly shattered. - - Commodore Elliott presented them in 183 8, and ever since they have ornamented the entrance and mysti fied curious visitors. Philadelphia Public Ledger. Wants Snakes- Protected. At a meeting of the Melon Growers' association it was decided to adopt resolutions for the preservation of all snakes of the chicken and Spreadhead variety In the melon belt, and the sense of the meeting was that the in crease of the reptiles should be wel corned. The chicken and the spreadhead snakes are the natural enemies of field mice, and destroy scores of .them each dny. Carml Correspondence St. Louis Times. QUAKER REFLECTIONS.. From the Philadelphia Record. Blue over-alls the skies. It's when he has nothing to do that the fireman is really between two fires. It makes some fellows chesty to think of all the medals coming to them. Unlike a thermometer, it's the girl of high degree that is apt to freeze you. . Blobbs "Up in the Arctic regions the nights are six months long." Blobbs Imagine a crowd of Eskimos singing We Won't Go Home Till Morning.' " Hoax "You say that peculiar looking dog of yours came from Peru What Is his name?" Joax "I call him Quinine." Hoax "Quinine V Joax "Yes, on ac count of his Peruvian bark!" Ria-liECTIONS OF A BACHELOR. From the New York Press. A nrettv sure wav not to be a good husband is to be married. ' From twenty to thirty a man seeks" honor, from then until he dies Comfort. A girl is never' sure she couldn't love a man just to be able to think so. A person's morals are like his best clothes to be worn on special occasions. The trouble with giving money . to charity is you haven't any chance to get even with anybody the way you have after a horse trade. i THE EVENING STORY With Tessa as Proxy. (By Jerome- Sprague.) "Tessa." said Miss Marlon, with de cision, "you are not making that bed properly." Tessa, tucking in the shee: of the doll's bed, raised limpid, inquiring eyes. "I told you I wanted hospital corners." Tessa wavered, curled a small red lip and overflowed. ."Don't cry; oh, Tessa, don't cry." Miss Marion expostulated c. on flj? m flung herse'f at fulllength Tessa did not movo "Well, I shall have to let Mary Ban nigan do it." said Mis wrinn Mary Brannigan and Tessa Votoldi mc.uk sworn rivals in the affections of tne settlement teacher, the small Italian raised a calculating eye. - Mary, every red curl bobbing, every freckle radiant, already had hold of one corner of the innnitesimal sheet. Then Mary pulled and Tessa pulled. remaps you'd better let Tessa fin- lsn it, Mary," said the teacher weakly. Mary blazed wrathfully, "Aw, shs aon t know how!" on, well," Miss Marion sighed, "see if ycu can make it, Mary. Tessa can watch you, and tell you if you don't do it properly." Tessa, sobbing a soft accompaniment to Mary's bedmaklng, squealed sudden ly: "She's gotta the hem out-a side." . Oh. Mary," said " Miss Marlon, re proachfully. "I thought you could, do it." "An' I can," said Mary, "but I won't, and straightway, like a small fury, she tore the bed to pieces, and flung the mattress on the floor. The twenty-small girls of the Little Housekeepers' Class looked at the teach er with expectant eyes. "Oh. Mary," quavered Miss Mason, isne felt unequal to discipline. It was very hot and the room was close, and the children had been restless and fussy all the morning. "Oh. Mary." she Quavered again, as a young man in a Panama hat and round. clerical collar poked his head In at the window. Can't you and the little girls come over and have lunch with my boys In the parish office?" he asked. A sigh of blissful anticipation issuea from twenty throats. They have been so naughty," miss Mason hesitated. "I don't know whether I should let them." Twenty pairs of eyes reproached her, and the young rector said: . "No one ought to be naughty on such a day." Well, if you will promise to De very good," Miss Marion finally decided; and, like lion and lamb, Tessa and Mary led a decorous procession. The young rector's class In wood carv ing were having sandwiches and cake and lemonade, provided by the ladies of the parish. There was a big pitcher of the lemonade, and the ice tinkled de- liciously as the biggest boy filled twenty glasses for the twenty little girls. The young rector, beaming witn en thusiasm, sat down beside the little set tlement teacher. "It's lovely work, Miss Mason." he said. Marion shook her head. "Oh, no, It isn't," she said; "it's horrid. They are so" ungrateful. I wish I were out on a hotel porch, in my best linen frock, with my hair marcelled, and with the waves beating a soothing accompaniment to the conversation of some- " intelligent masculine." - ' ' " ' With a twinkle in his eye, the young rector asked, "Can't I masquerade as an intelligent masculine?". . "Oh," Miss Mason conceded, "you might. But I'm not dressed for the part. Shirt waists and serge skirts and tan shoes, and dusty ones at that" she poked out a small'foot in a shabby shoo are not the attire of attractiveness. We planted vegetables in the school gar den all the morning beans and things until we were grubby." I don't believe you would be really happy on that hotel porch," asserted the young rector, as he sat on the edge of his desk, and looked down at her, "I should! I want to be care-free and frivolous and to forget the problems and the suffering and the submerged people. I want to go where every one is clean and the air is pure and where can breathe ," as she caught her breath sharply he bent over her with sudden tender light in his eyes. "Poor little woman!" he murmured. "Don't pity me," Miss Mason said. with flaming cheeks, "but I do-like pret ty things. Why, I am a different crea ture in my pink dimity. You've never seen me in itr have yOu?" He smiled down at her indulgently. No," he said slowly, but I saw you unce in an old white linen that had been torn and trampled, and you held in your arms a little child that you had saved and you were beautiful " Oh. that was Tessa," Miss Mason eald Gdickly, "the morning the fire engine horses ran away. It was a wonder we weren't both killed." , . . I caw you for the first time and kaew then that I had found what I had been looking for all my life." Her startled eyes read the meaning In his. "Oh, no, no," she protested, "I am not good enough. I am vain and frivo lous and I long for the fleshpots." He went on steadily. "I have seen you since then, every day, teaching your little girls to be tidy and sweet and good and I have wondered at your bravery when you mignt De in luxury cool and comfortable. "Bo might you," she reminded him How many men Of your talent and in fluence would have chosen a downtown church?" Oh. that," he put it away lightly.- "I like it. and I am a man but not many women would do it." Don't," she said tremulously; "don't praise me," and she rose and went to meet Tessa, who was coming toward her, sobbing. "Oh, Tessa! Crying again?" It was discovered after some question lng that Tessa's conscience was hurting her. She was sorry, she whispered, that she had been bad in the morning. She did love her teacher, and at the end of the confession her arm went around Miss Mason's neck. 'Poor baby!" Miss Mason crooned as she gathered the small culprit in her arms, "dear heart," and the wet cheek lay against her own. As they sat in the alcove the stained glass window of the parish office made background of sapphire light, against which Miss Mason's fair hair shone like halo. Tessa, smiling and forgiven, lay with her limpid eyes shut. . The rector, still seated on the corner of his desk, looked at the pair with thoughtful eyes. Do you -- really think you would be happy on the hotel porch " he probed. It would be cool," . Miss Mason saia Wistfully, "but I should miss the love," and her eyes went toward the children playing peacefully at the end of the room. "Whose love?" he asked boldly. Tessa's eyes opened sleepily. "I love-a you!" she murmured fervently. The eyes of the rector held the eyes of the little teacher, masterfully. "You say it like that!" he commanded. "Oh, I I can't!" she breathed, all pinK and white -and tremulous, "but Tessa shall be my proxy!" (Copyrighted, 1907, by Homer Sprague.) HVMOR OF THE DAY "Do you think Dauber's picture worth catalogue price?" "It's still a quarter, isn't it?" Harper's Weekly. The Big Fish (boastfully) Yes, Sir, he was at least ten feet long and must have weighed 500 pounds if he weighed an ounce, but the line broke and I got away from him. Puck. She There is at least one woman In i the world who can thank you for ren dering her happy for life. He Why, I'm not man led. She That's what I mean! Illustrated.Bits. "How is the colonel this morning?" "He's getting bettuh, suh." "I heard yesterday that he was too weak to lift an arm." "No, suh, there's nevuh been a day when he's been unable to take a drink, suh." Houston Post. Silas Hardacre Yes, every Tuesday and Thursday night is "ripping up night" with the ladies' sewing social in this town. City Drummer Indeed 1 And what do they rip up? Silas Hard acre Carpet rags, pedigrees and the absent members. Chicago News. George Washington had decided to retire. "Of course," he said, "that will bring up the old conundrum, 'What shall we do with our ex-presidents?' I wish I could give the newspapers some thing else to talk about." Then a hap py inspiration struck him, and he eat down and wrote his Justly celebrated farewell address to his countrymen. Chicago Tribune. Tourist What do the people round here live on, Pat? jarvey Pigs, sorr. mainly, and tourists In the summer. Punch. He Are you a vegetarian? She Oh, no! I love good beef. He Ah! I wish I were beef. She Well, I like veal also. Pick-Me-Up. Benevolent Old Party Well, well, but you are a little fellow to be playing in the street. Can you talk yet? The Little Fellow Naw, but I kin swear. Puck. "You really should be more economi cal," said Wiseman. "O!" replied Gal ley, "I will be some day." "Yes; some day you'll have to be." "All right; If I have to I won't mind it so much." Philadelphia Press. "Don't you think," said the candid member of the city board, "that wo ought to open the door and take the public in on this business?" "But, my dear colleague," returned another, "if we open the door, we can't take them in." Baltimore American. "Newton discovered why the apple fell, did he not?" "He did." "Well, then, it remains for some equally brilliant mind to discover why it is that plums fall to those higher up." London Tribune. "Met, Loved, Married, All In 24 Hours." "Good headline, eh?" cackled the art ist who had composed it. "Fine," assented the managing edi tor. "Keep the photos handy. We'll need 'em again in about a month." Washington Herald. . , . , , Actress Did my death scene seem realistic? Theatrical Manager I should say so! Whv. a life insurance director in the audience fainted dead away! Minneap olis Tribune. GLOBE SIGHTS. From the Atchison Globe. What fun people have being uncom fortable at a picnic! You can spoil some men by telling them they have ideals. People who are always saying, "Now listen to me," never get very far. The man who "doesn't care" at the soda fountain, usually gets vanila. Fortunately a man isn't always fined for contempt of court because he feels It. The man who carries accident Insur ance usually leads a very monotonous existence. The woman never lived who had the curtains at the right pitch or angle to suit the men folks. It's a wonder people do not hate George Washington and Abe Lincoln; they are so generally admired. Telling a man not to worry Is usually about as effective as warning a harvest hand against eating too much. The average man is pretty good at looking on the bright side of trouble. If it doesn't happen to be his own. You are not in need of a tonic If your appetite makes sawdust breakfast foods taste like something to eat. Funny how a little boy will wade In a creeK or muanoie an aay, ana re Dei when he has to wash his dirty feet t bedtime! "There is no sense In that," you hear people say many times every day. And it sometimes seems tney don't say it often enough. There Is one thing true of all farmers: They never have time to have their pictures taken ortener tnan once in ror ty years. After every sporting event, nearly ev ery man who hadn't the nerve to bet, will tell you he had previously picked the winner. The first year a boy Is away from home he never fails to speak, in his let ters, of the evenings he has spent In his room studying. An Atchison man has a new way of telling a fish story. "I caught so many fish when a Doy. ne says, -tnai I ao not care for them now." Every town woman thinks with scorn that if she were a farmer's wife, she would like to see the man who could make her do the milking. Nothing makes a man quite so mad as to be put to sleep in a bed that has to have a lot of fancy coverings remov ed before it Is ready to sleep in. II is about as hard for a widow to reconcile No. l's kin to her second mar riage as it is a widower to convince his Children they need a new mother. - If the average man has any knowl edge of statistics, it Is more likely to concern the percentage of the baseball league than the total acreage of winter wheat. Harvesting is properly regarded as hard work, but every old man will tell you it is child's play compared with when he was voting and the reaping was done with "cradles." Subject for discussion at the next meeting of the Lancaster Literary so ciety. "When a farmer Visits Atchison, how many timet does he shake hands before he returns?" : A New York department store Is go ing to handle real estate. The next move ot this commercial enterprise will probably be to establish a cemetery In the bargain basement.