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i DON'T BE A TIDEWAD ! I fe " ADVERTISE IN THE BUGLE j Mj Have yon got mnythink to aell or awap? Do gg M you want to buy enny think? THEN TRY A AD g 3 WITH US. Biggest and only newspaper in this 1 U end of the Co. & p Advertising rates furnished with great cheer. r C9 SircuUshlon books open to nobuddv. Sf Eg YOULL HAFT TO TAKE OUR WORD FOR IT j THDTTTnTH u TT -Oiil HJT V J. i iiit 5 In .It A Copyright, 1912, by E. A. Grozier. Pay up your back subscription to the Bugle & thus fill a long-felt want on our part. We Can't Rim a First Claw News paper on Hot Air and Cold Potaoxe. P. S. If we are not in leave the money with L , ,. mit na.t drtMT. - ' f t Aj( "f ttor I3S G . KTt A. T'-oV. ' V N MIS'T IT v -EW "ROCS l-tCTS. IS A. I - I r J? i O v . I i i r l i &fe-WrTcX il THE BINGVJLLE BUGLE I G-ro cJTrWSot HAS JK. "Boil, oi-r kj5- 1 0 w owO?r SX- r ,rVT" rE ht.mh.S BO D Vy AS A -TR.X , M To p o LZ-V " ? 3 ,WoV, WJr1i,""r,i "'WNTttV utr A FLAT" The Leading Paper of the County Bright, Breezy, Bellicose, Bustling ( Bow !th tin bear !ttt1 be Imprre acb ahtnlDg honr By ymtberins tioney all thm Amy From erery opening fleur. Tb chpwt tflTortlitof aMrUnn la and flee da.. For farther Information call ma or address the editor. KDDYTORIUL Goodness gracbious, here we've went and forgot to write a eddytor lul about George Washington's birthday and now George's birth day has went and got past us and is a part & parcel of the great be yond which can newer be recalled, but has went & goned forewer! We calkilate we ort to say some think about G. Washington's birth day in this ishue of the Buggle even if it is gone by, being as there is a hole lot of truth in that motto, "It is better newer than late," so here goes. (.However, our remarks will be breef.) G. Washington was a great man he was one of the greatest men which ever lived in his day or has sinst for that matter he was a greater man than Bingvule has ewer perdooced he was a bigger man than Cy Hoskins is even (even if Cy has got money m the bank & is one of the biggest property own ers in Bingville and a Deacon & Filler in the Bing-viU-e church), and if Cy desires to take excepshions to this statement when he reads these lines and says that he thinks he his self is a greater man than G. Wash ington and gits mad at tts and comes to this offis and stops his Buggle we don't keer so long as Cy pays tip his subscripshions when he stops becuz we would a blamed sight ruther loose a subscriber, even Cy Hoskins hisself, than to admit that enny person in Bingville is a bigger man than jest G. Washing ton. We don't keer a hang about the $2 (and no cts.) wich is involved, but its the principle of the thing which we keer about. G. Washington was not only the greatest man who ever lived when he did, but he was also the Father of his Country. We persoom there be them in Bingville who are so ignorunt that they don't know that George was the Father of His Country & 11 that s so we feel sorry for them, but He was, and that's all there is to it, and we've got the fackts to proove it. When G. Washington was in his prime this country was ruled by the irun hand of Kink George of Eng land (if we ain't mistaken and we generally ain't),., and as a result them as desired to conduckt their- selfs as patrits accordink to the dicktates of their own conshiensea, couldn't do so and as a result they got purty sulky about it. Finally George he says to the patrits, "I tell you what let's do let's deklare ourselfs free & independent 1 What do yoa fellers say?" And the patrits said, "B'gosh well do it !" and they did arid so war broke out and the red coats and the patrits fit and fit and bled and bled and fled and fled and they had a awful time. Think of the winter the patrits j spent at Valley r orge (wherever that is), when the snow was thick on the ground & the thermommetter was below zero! What if us folks in Bingville had to go through a winter like that! I gess we'd com plain and lament, but did the patrits do so? Answer No, sir ee bob, they didn't ! They jest grinned and put up with it and when spring come they pitched in and licked the british and established justice, peace, prosperity, in the course of human events when it becomes necessary to have a conscitooshion, et cettery, et cettery, too numerous to mentshion that's what they done. Hooray for G. Washington and his birthday even if it is went & gone ! Personals to Write About This Wk-Scms-times ScKietfcink Important Like a Skandal or Scrcethink Hap pens, but Sich Is not the Case This VYk-Why Is This Thus, We Ask? "We Don't Know" We Answer Lafe Whittacre has had considerable pain In one of his toes for a spell back. He consulted Doc Lfvermore and Doc said he calkilated it must be frost-bit. H wanted Lafe to let him amputate same to see if that would give him entry relief, btrt Lafe he objeckted. He said he would ruther have the toe froze on than cut off. Mrs. Lige Green put out her wash last Monday and it was so cold that it all froze on the line. Mrs. Ore en says she is a-going to leave it out there til it thaws if she has to wait til spring. Amzl Gookins, our respeckted towns man who fit in the sivil war being hit with a bullet ki 1863, where it was never recovered, says he beleeves the the bullet has worked up into his right shoulder, becuz he has a pain there, of late. He was first shot in the foot. We got two new subscribers last week but no money. Gid Johnson has a boil on his neck. Gid has boits every spring, but he says they are coming a little mite early this year. Mrs. Jerushy Perkins left a mess of spare ribs on our desk recent. Thanks awful, Jerushy, they was tumble good eatin. They is some talk of getting up a dance in Bingville soon. It looks a good deal like snow as we go to press, but we hope it wont, we have enuff snow now to last til spring. Bud Hinckley who. ain't quite right in his head, got scratched by Peter Han son's cat tother day. Bud was a-trying to pull of the cats tale, but failed. Persunnels is considerable scsirse with us this week. If you happen to hear enny next week please let us I know. We git terrible disgusted with Fate some wks. Now take this wk. for instants here we've cudgeled our tired brain to think up somethink which we could write a long peece about for this ishue of the Buggle as uehual, but have we succeeded in thinking up something important ? No we have not Why is it that some wks there will be more big important things to write for the Bugle than we've got room for and then fust thing we know along!! come a wk when there ain't skeercely nothin a tall, like this wk. Hod Quigly and Lem Brown had a few words down to Hen Weathersby's store tother evg over a game of check ers, but nothin come of it. Lem, he said Hod moved one of his men when he wassent lookin, but Hod said Lem was a liar and then he called Hod a liar, and after they had called each other liars for a spell the Rev. Saml Moore, our beloved paster, drapt into the store, and when he seen that they was about to asalt each other he cammed them down and cooled them off by tellin them j that their conduckt was unseemly and not becaming to members of his flock. As for us we hoped that Lem and Hod would pitch into each other, becuz we wanted somethink to write, but Rev. Moore had to come along and spile it all. We spose Rev. Moore means well but we wish to goodness he would tend to his own bizness instid of spiling news for us when news is as skeerce as it is this wk. about a duzzen eggs a day. Who can beat Mrs. Skinner for eggs? While chopping kindling last Sunday morning to bild a fire with Rev. Moore, our beluwed pastor, cut his finger near ly almost haff off. Hank Dewberry says that's whot he gits for working on the holy Sabbath. Hank don't beleeve in working on Sunday or enny other day. Dad Henderson got a pair of boots recent, which, is too big for him and rubs his heels. Dad says he calkilates them boots has wore through seven pair of socks sinst he had em. This is awful hard on socks. S AS? IMS Locals Miss Phronicia Watkins is reported to be censiderin whether to git married this winter or wait until next June. Who she is a-going to marry we have not learned. Miss Sally Hoskins, whose bewtiful pomes on "Love" have cheered up the readers of the Bugle from time to time, give a popcorn party to a few seleckt friends at her home last Tuesday evg. All report a pleasant time. Hen Smiley's wife give him a pen knife for Xmas and now he's went and lost it like a blamed fool. Hen never could keep a knife. Enny person finding said knife kindly return same to Hen. Otherwise hell haft to buy a new one, but what's the use becuz he would go and lose it also. Mrs. Abe Skinner tells us that her Country Correspondence CALAMITY CORNERS. Gale Hooker traded his mowin machine for a pair of oxes last week. You ort not to of did it, Gale yottll need that mower next harvest. Ezekiel Snodgrass was a Bingville vissiter last week. He reports several deep snow drifts betwixt here and there. Sam Snyder of Snake Bend don't visit our midst as often as of yore. We hope they ain't ennything wrong be tween you and Hetty, Sam. Jake Holmes caught cold recently and now he has a healing in his head. My goodness, but we'd hate to be Jake. PRO BONO PUBLICO. SORROW HOLLOW. Jemima Hoff had a chicken for din ner last Sunday. Mrs. Sam Bellew purchast a teakettle from a peddler tother day, and after he had left she diskuwered that it had a hole fn it. Mrs. Bellew beleeves the peddler knowd it all the time. Heck Plympton, while out hunting last week shot at a fox and says he only mist it by a few rods. Heck is a good shot when ennything ain't run nin. He prefers to shoot with a rest Ben McAllister went to a birthday party of Homer Wade's last Tuesday, Homer had a lot of hard sider on tap Ben he got a leetle too much in and had to stay all night at Homer's. The boys has been riggin him about it ever sinst VtKlTAS. I IIU l,A ,, 4111!. I'm gettin tumble sick hauling passengers and doing urnds for peepul between Bingville and the County seat free grattis for nothink and I hereby (five notisa that hereafter The Following; Rates Will Prevail. To hauling 1 passenjur from Bingville to the Co. seat 50 cts. For hauling one passenjur haff way, a quarter. For hauling babies, 10 cts. per head. For carrying a small pack age to Co. seat, 10 cts. For carry ing small package from Co. seat, same price. Large package, 15 cts. Very large package, ditto. For delivering word of mouth mes sage, nothink at all. These here rates go into effeckt at once. Fleece govern yourself accordin. Youri aiming to pleese, JAKE PEABODY BINGVILLE Stage Driver and Mail Carrier Good Ear Lugs Some peepul is born smart and then agin they is other peepul whot have to lern to be smart and still others whot newer can lern, but Jake Quimby is one of the smartest chaps in these here parts if we do say it ourself. When Jake's ole brindle cow died last summer Jake he cut off both her ears and naild em up agin the barn to dry. Well, when that awful cold snap come on last week Jake he goes and gits them cow's ears and he's been wearing them over hi? own ears ever sinst. He says his ears newer gits a mite cold. The cow's ears is sich a pertecshion to him that he wars em to bed. Hod's Foot Hurt Mrs. Hod Simmons exidentally let a flat iron fall on Hod s foot on last ironing day. Hod can't scairsly lift his fot offen the ground it is that sore, nor he can't hardly put it to the ground again when he gets it lined. Hod says he wishes to durnashion that it had fell on tother foot and knocked the daylights outen a corn which has been kens is laying for her at the rate of bothering him for the past 49 years. yiallw n A n n n n u n I will buy your bottles off of you if you have enny to sell and the price ain't too steep. I need these bottels to put my medisins into. The bicrcer the ho tels the better I will like if I won't pay enny more for a l,; bottel than I wood for a small one, becuz I haft to put more into the big bottel than I do in the small one. It you have enny bottels let me Know, and I will around and look at them. i.ivi.i tuny Jidliri TO ICwVs n them. come It won't Doc LIVERMORE mNGViiLLE Horse Dockter and Human SpeshiaJIUt 1