Newspaper Page Text
Fun and Fancy.
-A dreadful story-teller once as
serted that his voice was still for
truth-and so it was.
-The most tasteful hare-dresser
in the world-The cook.
-Steam is a servant that some
times blow up its master.
-Some authors die composing
some the other way.
-Our house-maid says the street
door doesn't talk, but she is answer
ing it all day long.
-The printer who has the devil
to pay, and doesn't pay him, ought
to be ashamed of himself.
-Some sons are chips of the old
-An ungrammatical judge is apt
to pass an incorrect sentence.
-A watch fitted with a second
hand need not necessarily be a
-"Get your sweetheart a new
set of teeth as a Christmas present,"
is the invitation of an advertising
-A farmer.has no right to pull
the ears of his corn ; it is unkind.
-A bachelor's face is often theI
worse for wear, a married man's for
wear and tear.
-"Boys will be boys" is non
sense. Boys will be men-if they
live long enough.
-Relative beauty - A pretty
-Why are handcuffs like guide
books ? Because they are made for
-What kind of molasses is no
molasses ? Why, N. O. molasses,
-Next to busy bees, boot-blacks
furnish the brightest example of im
proving the "shining hour."
-"Tell the mistress that I have
torn the curtain," said a gentleman I
lodger to a female domestic.
"Very well, Sir ; mistress will
put it down as rent.
-The correspondent who wishes
to know when Fastday is, is notified
that the day in which we live is I
about as fast a day as any the world r
-"Indeed, you are very hand
some," said a gentleman to his lady- a
"Pooh ! pooh !" said she "so you
would say if you did not think so."
"And so you'd think," he answer
ed, "if I did not say so."
-A little girl remarked to her
mamma on going to bed, "I am not
afraid of the dark."
"No, of course you are not," re
plied her mamma, "for it can't hurt
"But, mamma, I was a little afraid
once, when I went to the pantry in S
the dark to get a tart."
"What were you afraid of?" o
asked her mamma.
"1 was afraid I could not find ]
-A Connecticut fisherman one
day baited his hook with a live frog.
After patiently waiting some time
for a bite, as he chatted with a
friend, he found that his lively bait
had swum ashore, and was sitting
quietly on the rock by his side. Ie
wound up his line and went home"
-A Southern paper, having dis
cusrel the question propounded by
a New York paper, "Shall the next
President of the United States be a
woman ?" concludes as follows:
"W'e nominate Powers's 'Greek
Slave.' She has three of the quali- -
fications, at least-a marble brow, a
finely chiseled nose, and a silent
-There are two periods in the
life of a man at which he is too wise
to tell women the exact truth- Il
when he's in love, and when he
-"So, Wilkins, you're married, th
eh ? Well, how do you get along ?" G
"Not so well as I hoped. My wife P
gave me her hand previous to our
marriage, and it gratified me exceed
ingly. She now gives it to me every
day, and it doesn't gratify me at all. ra
-A minister at a colored wed
ding, wishing tomake some humor
ous remarks, said, "On such occa- tr
sion as this it is customary to kiss
the bride, but in this case we will
omit it." To this ungallant remark
the indignant bridegroom very J(
pertinently replied, "On such oceas
sions as this it is customary to give th
the minister $10, but in this case
we will Omiit it"
A cradle has been invented in
. Boston by which the baby can be
)r satisfactorily, securely and continu
ously rocked while the women go to
vote. So we my as well burn our
copies of Mrs. Akers' beautiful song,
"Rock Me to Sleep, Mother," and
b- try to forget the music.
g A cute Yankee went into a liquor
store, and asked for a half gallon of
wt whiskey, to be poured into a gallon
r- jug. This was done; but when pay
ment was demanded, the man re
il fused, and the liquor was emptied
out. The would-be purchaser had
probably anticipated something of
this kind, as be had previously filled
d the jug half full of water. As he
left the store his face was radian
it and jug half full of drinks, mcey
MEacamaT"' SOUTIEa PACeaT
g Foa ST. Lotis, CAIro,
MnuPms and the Bends
The steamers of this line will leave as
follows. at 5 P, M.
Giving through bills of lading over
the Illinois Central Railroad to al
points on Arkansas, White and Cumb
erland rivers. Through bills of lading
and passenger tickets issued to all
points on the Upper Mississippi. as
hih as St. Paul.
Plans of cabin may be see and state
rooms secured on application to
STEVENSON & VERLANDER.
135 Gravier street.
JOHN F. BAKER, President
Bills of lading over the Illinois Cent
ral Railroad signed only at the office of
r JAB. T. TUCKER.
26 Carondelet street.
, NEW ORLEANS, CHICAGO
AND THE WEST.
THE ILLINOIS CENTRAL RAILROAD
Blue Line, Via Cairo,
WILL TAKE FREIGHT
From New Orleans on firt
LEAVING DAILY, AT 5 P. M., FOR
CAIRO, CHICAGO, AND ALL
POINTS NORTH, WEST AND
EAST, AT THE LOWEST
All rates and all through bills of
lading from New Ot eans by above
route given, signed and recognized
only at the General Office of the Com
pany, No. 26 Carondelet Street.
Shippers by this route save all dray- I
age and transfer charges at Cairo,
and their goods are always under
cover, and no charges are made for
JAMES T. TUCKER,
ST. LOUIS. ' d
For St. Louis, Cairo and Memphis. F
• * Steamer KATIE,
J. M Warrm, Master; will
leave New Orleans for above ports on
Juno 10; June 24; G
SATURDAY, SATURDAY, a
July 8; July 22. o
For freight or passage apply on board,
J. JANNEY. No. 150 Common Street
A. A. GREEN, No. 196 Common Stree.
Where a plan of the cabin can be seen
New Orleans, Coast, Baton
Rouge andGr(,sse Tete Rail
road semi-weekly passen
V. I. GaArwnousa, Master;
JAMU McELRoY, Clerk,
Leaves every WEDNESDAY, at 5 P. M., B
and SUNDAY, at 10 A. M.
Returning. leaves Baton Rouge every
Monday and Thursday evenings.
For freight or .j;asage apply on board,
E. O. Mrnancox, 11 Conti street .
ST. Loris AND NEw OnELAs PACKET
FOR CAIRO AND ST. LOUIS.
Illinois Central Railroad Packets
SFOR MEMHPIS, CAIBO N
and the Bends-The fine ni
passenger steamers of g
this line will leave as follows: N
Giving through bills of lading to all
points on the Memphis and Charleston
Railroad, Nashville and Northwestern
Railroad, and Memphis and Ohio Rail- s
road-also to St. Louis.
Through Tickets furnished at lowest
rates to all points East, West and North, A
by all the various routes via Memphis,
Cairo and St. Louis. Staterooms se
cured at General Olffice, 104 Comam
A. A. WOODS, General Agent,
104 Common Street.
G. G. WAYNE, Preight Aent, .
87 Natchez Street,
JOHN N. BOFINGER. President,
Bills of lin for all freihts over
the Illinois aentadl ; signed
at the ofee of
JAMES T. TUCKEB,
pL 6-tt 96 Caroadelast Seet
in BAIL ROADS.
ir ST. LOUIS, IRON MOUNTAIN
)r THE ONLY ALL RAIL ROUTE
To St. Louis, Chicago, Omaha San
n Francisco, St Paul, Kansas City, Leav
r- enworth, St Joseph,
And all Foints North, Best and West.
TWO EXPRESS TRAINS leave the
d New Orleans, Jackson and Great
e Northern Railroad Depot daily, at 7
A. M. and 5 P. M.
y AN EXPRESS TRAIN leaves the foot of
Canal street daily at 8 A. M., via the
New Orleans, Mobile and Chattanooga
Railroad, making close connections
at Mobile with the Mobile and Ohio
Railroad to all points North, East
For tickets apply to
A. D. SHELDON.
Ticket Agent New Orleans, Jackson and
Great Northen Railroad, corner Camp
a and Common streets, under City
Hotel ; or to
r W. BEDELL.
Ticket Agent New Orleans, Mobile and
Chatanooga Railroad No. 150 Com
mon street, under St. Charles Hotel.
s J. H. WINGFIELD.
General Superintending Agent St. Louis,
Iron Mountain and Southern Railroad
NEW ORLEANS, MOBILE
f CHATTANOOGA RAILROAD.
The Mobile division of this road will be
opened for business on
Monday, November 21, 1870,
and passenger trains will ran as follows :
Leave New Orleans, from the foot of
Canal street, for Bay St. Louis, Pass
Christian, Mississippi City, Biloxi, Ocean
Springs, Pascagoulaand Mobile at 8 o'clock
A. M. Arrivive at Mobile at 2:30 o'clock
P. M., connecting at Mobile with the
MOBILE AND OHIO, and the MO
BILE AND MONTGOMERY RAIL
ROADS for all points
Leave Mobile for New Orleans at 11:20
A. M. Arriving at 6:10 P. M.
Fare Between New Orleans and Mobile,
THROUGH FREIGHT TRAINS RUN
EACH WAY DAILY. c
Freight received at New Orleans, at
the foot of Julia street before 4:30 P. M,.
delivered at Mobile early next morning.
FREIGHT AS LOW AS BY ANY
For further information, call at the
General Office of the company, rooms one
and two, up stairs. STORY BUILDING,
corner Camp and Common streetj.
J. R. KENDRICK,
General Superintendent. P
The New Orleans, Jackson, and Great
Norther anid lississippi
Run their Passenger Coaches and Bag
gages Cars, their combined
length without change.
BAGGAGE CHECKED FROM RE
SIDENCE TO DESTINATION.
The 7 A I. I. ExpresTrain runs Daily,
Makes close connections for Vicksburg,
Mem phis, St Louis, Chicago, Louisville,
and all points beyond, Sleeping cars at
night, Canton to Grand Junction and
The Mail Train leas New Orleans Dily,
at bP.. .
Makes schedule connections with Light- ?
ning Exprees traine, to all points NOBTH,
EAST and WEST. Carries the great
Time to New York, 70 lnrs.
New and elegantly fitted up Sleeping
Cars run to Humboldt, Tennessee, Cleve
land, Tennessee, and Louisville, Kentuc
Express Train South arrives at 1:301
Mail Train South arrives at 11 .,5 . M.
Ticket Oiee, Galveston, Iron Building.
Ticket Offces, New Orleans, under City
Hotel, Cor. Camp and Common streets,
and at Depot.
K Q. SEWALLI General Superintendent;
. B. MOREY, General Ticket Agent
New Orleans, Jackson and Great ,
E. D. FBROST, GeneralSuperintendent
D. a. MORW, Genral Ticket Agat.
Smi Oai ms a rohad.
. a sooTW, Geinemi. hinguqAgwshu .
NEW A DVFERTISEMENT8.
TE InsR S Co-Co.
Nos. 9, II 13 Merer Street,
SIole amaufluar, under Cadlyr's
aid Ieyer's hatnts,
INDIA RUBBER COMB8,
he Twist Combs
at Fine Tooth Combs,
[A variety of Elegant Fanoy Patterns. ]
of Pocket Combs.
Ie Ridding Combs.
io ALSO, SOLE LANUFACTURERS
COMBINATION SIDE COMBS
[MnaD UNDE FAULTr' PATENT.]
d The sale of any Combination Side
t Combs, no matter of what material
made, unless sold under a license
from us, is prohibited by law.
d CBLES A. DAA, Editor.
A Newupape el the Present Times.
Intended tlr Peesle New . Earuh.
Inemag FPrsea. MNechales. xreaests, Pro.
eileaml lme Wed~re. T~uakere sad alt Man.
ser of Honest Folks. ed tShe Wives, Soum. and
e Daugerseof aIsULeb.
ONLY ONE DOLLAR A YARN I 3
ON HUNDRED. OPIEs IPO 8,0.
Or ees than one Opet a Cop. Lot tre be a
S Club as evr Post oaeg.
s .-WEELYT SUN, 09 A TEAR,
of the e nd general aracter ap
STHE WEEKILY, but with a greater variety of
mtieeUllaeous readinC, and fhranshla the news
to it su scriber wthb greater fteslahns. becaus e
t a mOes twice a wesk lste of once only.
TUy DAILY SUN, W6 A TEAR. a
TERMS TO CLUEB
THE DOLLAR WIEKLY SUN.
Five ceplem, one a ber
Te copes,o one , searat addresse (and
ua esawaop to othe ga ep of elote.
Twae aq a ae a Bas teih defase.
et cIsIO i E Addresse
S sone. P estaan to ce adresd fah
hFifty eelPlte. oaea. y adresmed (and
Soemi· wleeyoaooa. etter uporft, ),
One hundred cnies ce year, to e asdres
(ad o SfsiiyOr on year otbleeltlmepoal
114b Caro elet DStla,
Oande hpurcndred copies, one farms, etpar, etc.
dre.,ed fundSeDetittorene _eerltote
Connmes b) r by nsrate as
TEn SEMI-WEEKLY SUN.
Fiv eoele4sons year, eaCparteleeadd.t
soon copies, one edr. les oterwl se trd (aed
an ditra copy to geter up of club).
on the Bill Dlof Li.
It ord, cheek or dTABLISHMraENT.
of every deseraptIon, just reoegved at
etween Catal and Customrouse
eN ws w Tet City.
MUTUAL LIFE INSURANCE
NO. 139 BROADWAY. m
LibGerl W.ddAnrt s i ade on .nnspi-n
mrnser. Promt, L ate nion iuaeno( . ah
Ansignnens oedml by Inaran& e Cas
F.ALL AND W INTER
ofevery descnptiom, rust recAmeie at
A~nkr XIv Qs~asra Vamr&hmrau
THE BALANCE WHEEL
4 times a second,
340 times a minute,
14,400 times an hour,
348,000 times a day,
292,00 times a week,
10,368,000 times a month,
196,144,000 times a year.
! MORE IS EXPECTED OFA WATCH,
THAN ANY OTHER KIND
OF YACHER .
It must not only run ll day, butall night;
not only on weekdays, but on Sundays and
Holidays. It w et r hanging upor lying
down--ide down or right side ap. It must
keep nmning when the wearer sits down or
stand up, When he walks or rides. In fact,
it is eapected to do its duty alt o times, in
j everyplace and in sery position,
s A Genuine Waltham Watch
will fulfil all these requirements. I wound
once a day, it will faithfully tick for you
SB a hundred and twenty-six million times in
a year, without even requiring fresh oil
le all that time.
d A Genuine Waltham Watch
5 Spring, 9 wheels, 51 Screws, and 98 other
- parts making alltagether 136 separate pieces.
ALL GENUINE WALTHAM
WatcJhem haves eveno
THE ZETcA JWZLLD RAVE I3El' JEWEL
TvE ruIe. JZWWELmD HAVE wrzxE
Every part of a Waltham Watch is made
by machinery, The machinery used in
making the movement of a single watch
coast over a Hundred Thousand Dolars,
yet we sell these Watches, in a solid Silver
Hunting Case, for $18. The same watch
could not be made by hand and fnisbeds
as perfectly for Taz Tmrs AS MUCE.
A Genuine waltham Watch
Is ihterchangeable, like a Springfield rife
that is, any part of one Watch is exacq y
like the same part in another ; and if ten
Watches of one grade were taken apart,
and the screws, wheels, springs, &e., were
mixed together, ten watches could be
made by putting these parts together
again, withuot any reference to their r
former combination. This is a
For, if any part of a Waltham Watch is b
injared we can always replace it at a
A SENUNE WALTHAM WATCH o
Is made with special reference to to
Other Watches will run for a year or two,
an require constant repairs ; but
A. Walthaa Watch
WILL RUN FAITHFULLY
FOR MANY YEARS.
We sell these Watches, le
IN SOLID SILVER HUNTING I
[N SOLID GOLD HUNTING CASES, $70 am
We have prepared an of
ILLUSTRATED PRICE UIT,
which describes the various grades of i
Watches in detail, gives the weight and Pa
quality of the Cases, and all other inform- 0
ation necessry for an intelligent selection.
We wish every one would send for it Fi
before ordering a Watch.
Write for it as fodowts :
Messrs. HowazD & CO.,
No. 785 Broadtay,
Plese send me your Illustrated Price
List oj Waltham Watches, as per adter
tisenent in TEE LOumTIANLI.
(Sign name and address in full) I
ZEetbancI the 2t~oney*
We have sent out over tee Thousand of
these Watches upon these oonditions, and
have only been asked to refund the money
in three cases, and not one of these was
on account of dissatisfacton with the
Watch, but because the parties needed
the money more.
Wh~va we AomTS, arn oHs rmucs
ms vs uxa To ALL. A amins or
9a-aDo o3 TZCA nC a Wav A W
-- EDn W NW ouR. nI A S I
maurum a m Pma Lr. -
wi DO sor TsEL
Waltham Watches in any Imitation, Gilt,
Plated, Oride, Filled Cases whatever (these
are all other names for Bras aor German Co
Silver). The Waltham Watch is worthy
ofa solid Gold or Bilvers Case, and we do
not propas to sellit in any other.
Is~r vURr 03 BinD 1on a PlanLcnr.
HO lABD a Csa
JemuIwr qed slrsmsse,
No. lW sntueaZ, Now Tam.
WAT CiAn EA, ETC.
H -nDuansa a
GOLD AND SILVER
WA T CHES,
And Fine old Jewelry. Keep alwayson
and all classes and paterns of Gold,
Silver and Steel Spectacles and Eye
Glasses. Glasses changed and sent to
any part of the country. Watch repairs
done promptly and waruated. Address
'H, orders to
112 Carondelet Street,
Feb. 16 ly Nlw Osnass.
S$5. GOOD $8.
4t, AT KL PllI
in AS THE SOLE AGENTS in the United
States for the LIVERPOOL WATCH CO.,
we are authorized by them to close out
a large line of European Watches,
ad Chains. eta., now in stock, for Cash, at
on prices never before known. All beautiful
in in finish, artistic in design, reliable or
ail accurate time, durable, and of the lates
style. Every Watch will be retailed at less
than cost of importation, and forwarded
securely packed, prepaid, to any part of
the country on receipt of price. Money
can be sent to as by Express, with or
des foter Express Co.. to return Goods or
Cash, which will secure promptiness and
safety to purchaser. Among our list will
be found. A BEATIFUL ENGLISH
SILVER, SOLID DOUBLE CASE
WATCH, genuine English full plate
EL jeweled movements, adjusted regulator,
E steel cut hands, engine turn nerl, correct
and serviceable article, large or small size
in complete running order, wiih an
elegant Gent's Vest Chain, Locket and
key, all complete, mailed free for FIVE
in DOLLARS. 1
A VERY HANDSOME WATCH in fine
r 18 karat Gold plated Double Cases
h imitation of $100 Gold Watch--engraved
or plain, genuine English, full plate
jeweled movements, adjusted regulator,
correct, and in complete running or
der with elegent Gent's Vest Chain,
e withLocket and Key, mailed pre-paid for A'
only EIGHTEEN DOLLARS.
The Oride Gold Watch,
IN MASSIVE ORIDE GOLD Double
Hunting Magic Spring Cases, elegantly
engraved, or engine turned, Genuine
Patent Lever movements, full jeweled,
regulated and warranted to keep correct
time, and wear equal to Gold, preci- F]
sely like in appearance, make, finish,
brilliancy' bf color. $200 Gold Watch!
One of these splendid Watches will he
forwarded by mail free to any address, in
handsome morocco case, lined with velvet
and satin, (Ladies' or Gent's size Wtch, )for
only TWELVE DOLLARS. at
Watches for Holiday Presents manufac
tured to order.
GENUINE AMERICAN WATCHES
of all grades, in Gold and Silver Cases.
from $18 up to $200. Other Good Watches
equally low. With every Club of six
Watches, of any kind, we send one extra
of same kind free, as a premium to getter
up of the Club. A superior stock of Ge
nuine Oride Gold Chains, $2 to $6 each,
warranted fully equal to Gold in brilliancy Ut'
of color, wear, etc., Bills of over $12 col
lected on delivery, if desired. All Bills of ''`
$12, and less, must becash in P. O.
Money Orders, or Registered Letters, at
our risk. Goods carefully selected, packed
and forwarded pre-paid by mail, or by The
Express, or reeipt of price. Safe delivr d
ofall good. guarenteed. Watches forward- Vit
ed to be examined to parties known I]
when express charges both ways are paid.
No goods forwarded westof the Miississippi Ev
River, with bill to collect on delivery.
Purchasers must pay all express charges
on goods sent C. O. D. for return me
of money. All Cash ordtl forwarded
(ree of charges to destinaticm. Catalognes
Free. Address all orders.
CHAS, P. NORTON d CO.,
Impoters of' Watches, etc. D.
Established 18i7. 86 Nassu St., N. Y.
Lock-Smith & BeU-langer
IR05 I AILIIGS FITTED E'P C
Zror Wiefer repa.ired to
206, COMMON STREET,
NEW ORLEANS. ma
Pw- Presses repaired, Bells and Gong
Hoases, and Steamboats Fitted a
COLORIED SAMEN'S IEL
NO. 91 FRONT LEVEE,
Boarding and Lodtgng
o0. oiO3Azr r. *JOUAIN.
GIGNAC & JOURDAIN,
Comma Corr amo Vna, No. 239.
ALWAYS ON HAND
thlk nrSmi V3, e TUe, ?D1i a,
wom a sMe str e
* m a
DRY GOODS, a
JOSEPH H. 7
S631C.... CANAL STREFT,
air, FIRST FLOOR:
reds DRY GOODS, GENTS F
LADIES ROOM FOR SHAWL, ,
CARPETS, MATTING ANDI
ed A visit to the store will
persons wishing to buy cheap a'
w 110.... CANA. STREET.. !01
of Near St. Charles,
y NEWI ORLE.41S, LA.
a MEN'S AND BOVw,
\oP s ow0 MAKE)
wt BOYS AND CHILDREN,'
BIES AND BOYS' SHImTS IDI Ti OU
Every Article Marked in
to Plain Figures.
, Goods sold on "one price" .sysgt. a
,r any article purchased which failr to
satisfaction can be returned and th m%
ey will be refunded.
S 'Moderate Prices and Fro
e Stock to select from are s;te
e the inducements offered at
B. T. WALSHE'S
i PREIXIU SHIRT AND CLOTHIIIG 1FPOll
s 110 Canal St., ncar St. Charyr,
e o vc Orloans.
N. B.--Letter l)rdcr- receive prumapt
attention and filk4 C. 0. D. it diluated
$785 rvory WTocr:
We want Smart and Enertetic A,1,a K
utroduce our popular ant justly ce.cbr
ted inventions, in every V'ilha. 71I0f
and City in the World.
Indispensable to Every
They are highly approved of, enkrtd
and anopted by Lwadies, Physidens ad
Dirin,.. and now a GREAT FAITO
ITE with them.
Every Family will Purchase One
of'more of them. Something thr: their
merits are apparent at a GLANCL
And all who keel, FANI. SIt
will find our excellent ,rtihc~, L
VERY RAPID)LY, gives 1,r:ct 'r.,
tion and netting
to all Dealers and Agents.
Country Rights Free
to all who desire engaging ir an 11,,,,,b
Respetabae and PrrfibUl, lminsss. at t'e
same time doing gool to their ,'"l
nions in life Sample $2,0), sent frr by
mail on receipt of price. SEND FO0
WHOLESALE CIRCULARB. ADIRES,
Jictoria Manuufacttrin9' C*
17 PARK PLACE. NEW yolK.
OF 'VEi Y DLlCRII!ON.
BOOTS AND 8HOE8,
BELTING, PACKING & II0 ,
BALL TOYS, ko.
303 BoP0oAATr.t @0. F3,IIKJJ SN., .
2 LaxIasrse , crcano.
807 sMauiu S.amu., 5szF3&5O
F. L SHFPP&PJ)
3 A. £a e, SwdM7J